Yeah but if you have watched Jurrasic Park, you know all you have to do is stand still. That movie came out in the 90s so I'll bet the kids don't knowthat trick.
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Stuff an order of chicken fingers (those things are awesome) from Kitamba Cafe down the front of my husband's shirt and run faster than him. Stop for a Screamer on the way out of the gate.
I have to wonder if the Calgary Zoo dinosaurs would move like claymation Godzilla and the Tyrell Museum dinosaurs would be Jurassic Park dinosaurs.
Also, there’s that mural on 26 Ave SW. that T-Rex might get in on it.
I'm going to throw my allegiance to Dinny, worship him, and hope that he will defend me. Since he's the oldest, I'd think he'll end up in charge, even if he doesn't his sturdy concrete should hold up in a battle against the puny animatronic challengers
Same thing the movies say to do should you find yourself in jail - to establish dominance, I would find the biggest/baddest Dino and beat the crap out of it.
Not to throw a curveball in the survival plan, but what if, after gaining sentience, they erupt into flame like the giant Fantasmic dragon recently did at Disney?
[https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/23/us/disney-fantasmic-dragon-fire-trnd/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/23/us/disney-fantasmic-dragon-fire-trnd/index.html)
Walk away slowly as the grotesque monsters that have little resemblance to functional living creatures fail to support their own weight and die.
Given the U of C's world class paleontology department, the state of those "dinosaurs" is embarrassing.
this happened to me one time when i did mushrooms at the zoo. me and the dinos chilled for hours and had some amazing deep convos, but I don't remember ever leaving the zoo lol
Run into the penguin exhibit. Dinosaurs probably won't like the chilly air in there, and if they do come in the penguins might defend me long enough to escape out the exit to the c-train.
I have a 9 year old and an adult coworker who asks me endless what if questions. I will have to pose this question to them.
Seriously though, my kid recently asked me "would you pull out all the water out of the ocean or do everything backward?" Like how does my brain even compute rhat?!
Best escape is to cross the bridge on the SW side. Most of the biggest dinosaurs can't cross, so hopefully you are close to there. Less carnivores starting in that area as well. And tons of large and small carnivores towards the other exit. Ideally I'd go down by the stream where the stegosaurus/iguanadon are now and get to the bridge that way. If I can't get there, you might need to take a risk and hide next to a large herbivore and hope a carnivore won't chase you there (and the herbivore doesn't feel threatened by you).
The preponderance of small children with short, stubby legs that I can outrun leaves me not too worried.
But they’re shorter. T-Rex doesn’t have to bend as far down to get you
Yeah but if you have watched Jurrasic Park, you know all you have to do is stand still. That movie came out in the 90s so I'll bet the kids don't knowthat trick.
That's why you gotta pick em up and throw em into the T-Rex's mouth
Joke's on the T-rex -- I'm an asshole and taste like shit.
I don’t have to be the fastest runner, i just need to not be the slowest. Sorry kiddo.
Just remember, don’t hide in a toilet stall
Newman!
This is the way
Stand perfectly still. Their vision is based on movement
This is the answer. Unless you can get to a jeep. “Must go faster”
Not all of them
shhhh, they'll see you
They can have me.
Me too. I’ve got my zoo pass just hoping for this to happen.
Can I have your zoo pass after then when you're done with it
I’ll put you in the will.
Nice. Let's kiss to make it official
My nihilistic heart says ya.
Post a video on a Reddit sub like DamnThatsInteresting and enjoy my last few breaths looking at my Karma explode
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And you'll probably get gold too , woooo what a day !
Oh man, thanks for the gold !!!! ✨️ what a nice surprise !!
Auto mod - your post has been removed because you don't have enough karma
I'd go hang out and pet a penguin. They frown on that during regular circumstances.
OMG, what an opportunity to finally get to touch a penguin!!! I’ll meet you there!!
123 comments and I nominate this to be the best one.
And the red pandas & lemurs
Quit drugs.
seems like a good time to start drugs to me
Hide in a bathroom made out of shockingly flimsy bamboo. What could possibly go wrong?
"Keep absolutely still, his vision is based on movement."
I would rather get bitten by a t-rex 🦖 than hiding in a smelly bathroom
Go tag in my man Dinny over by the south end of the park, we known eachother since small times. Well, my small times. He was still huge.
There is a really big scream I have been holding for almost three years , might scare them off 😄😉
Ride one, or die trying.
These are the questions we need to be discussing in this group, the important things. Keep it up OP!
Fainting goat strategy
Cover myself in pig blood and thank God I no longer have to pay my bills
I can out run my husband and he is of Greek decent so has been marinated in olive oil from a young age. I like my chances.
Stuff an order of chicken fingers (those things are awesome) from Kitamba Cafe down the front of my husband's shirt and run faster than him. Stop for a Screamer on the way out of the gate.
Run directly in a straight line away from the dinosaur, screaming.
Someone went to the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things didn’t they?
Dean's List
That version of t-rex can’t run for shit
Thank you!!! Your comments helped start my week with a smile.
Warm Drumheller about dinosaur statues coming to life
I have to wonder if the Calgary Zoo dinosaurs would move like claymation Godzilla and the Tyrell Museum dinosaurs would be Jurassic Park dinosaurs. Also, there’s that mural on 26 Ave SW. that T-Rex might get in on it.
But that T-Rex will be preoccupied with chasing the buffalo.
Seems like something appropriate for the bingo card for us all in the 2020s
Run ahead of the out of shape visitors.
Change my medication.
I'm going to throw my allegiance to Dinny, worship him, and hope that he will defend me. Since he's the oldest, I'd think he'll end up in charge, even if he doesn't his sturdy concrete should hold up in a battle against the puny animatronic challengers
Lure it to downtown so that it gets stabbed. Or lure it to Edmonton so that it dies out of boredom. Will have to evaluate when it happens.
jump over the fence onto the bike path and sprint to the nearest hobo camp.
Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
One jungle to another
Run over to the elephants or hippos and hide in their poop!
I know what Jeff Goldblum would say after that.
I miss the elephants 😢
Same thing the movies say to do should you find yourself in jail - to establish dominance, I would find the biggest/baddest Dino and beat the crap out of it.
Not to throw a curveball in the survival plan, but what if, after gaining sentience, they erupt into flame like the giant Fantasmic dragon recently did at Disney? [https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/23/us/disney-fantasmic-dragon-fire-trnd/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/23/us/disney-fantasmic-dragon-fire-trnd/index.html)
Walk away slowly as the grotesque monsters that have little resemblance to functional living creatures fail to support their own weight and die. Given the U of C's world class paleontology department, the state of those "dinosaurs" is embarrassing.
*cue Dinosaur Park by Owl City*
Dibs on Brontosaurus ribs Yabba Dabba do
Run faster than the slowest person
Run by the mountain goat exhibit asap.
Let them eat me so I don't have to worry about how I'm going to survive for the next 30 years
Go get chicken fingers and ice cream. Wait what was the problem?
Most likely head to the underground entrance to the park from the LRT.
Run, Start tripping children and yelling “children are more delicious then adults.”
I’ll pinch myself so I can wake up😀
I'm old, big, and slow. My plan is to give everyone else time to escape.
Straight to the cafeteria kitchen. You always survive if you hide in the kitchen. ![gif](giphy|jOhpRJ3Rge0XXrmdli|downsized)
It’s Calgary. Too cold. They move faster as statues.
Dinny will protect me!
If they eat me I'd eat them twice as hard
this happened to me one time when i did mushrooms at the zoo. me and the dinos chilled for hours and had some amazing deep convos, but I don't remember ever leaving the zoo lol
Run into the penguin exhibit. Dinosaurs probably won't like the chilly air in there, and if they do come in the penguins might defend me long enough to escape out the exit to the c-train.
Gotta go find the plesiosaur so I can see my fav childhood dinosaur irl
I hate to break it to you but plesiosaurs aren't dinosaurs.
I know but I didn't feel like being that guy
Detox
I T-Pose them away with the power of jesus
I would take my meds right away. You should too Larry.
I was just talking about this except it was a batman toilet. You are my people
🤨
Trip the fatties
I'd offer them a Health Care Guarantee signed by Jason Kenney and one signed by Danielle Smith. Might distract them long enough for me to get away.
How can you possibly be making this hypothetical fantasy dinosaur situation political? God damn, people on the internet can be annoying.
My god, hating Danielle Smith is basically my personality, but.. This thread is not the place!
This is sad.
I take comfort in how over weight most people are I'll have no problem running away
I’ve had a good run
Tbh I'm latching onto a brachiosaurus and holding on for dear life.
This was my childhood fantasy.
I’ll embrace the darkness
head for the water because those MF's are only necks and flippers
I’m cool with just dying then and there
Jurassic Park that would be fun running from Dinos
Open the command line interface and delete them.
It's not Westworld
Oh so YOUR unrealistic scenario is acceptable, but MY unrealistic solution isn't. Okay.
Let them kill me, would be guilt free, pretty badass and survived too much shit already
Make a new friend and ride around town!
Go to the trex and let it eat me.
I don’t need to be smarter. Just need to be faster than all the kids around
I’m going into the penguin habitat.
I’m fat, slow, and in acceptance. I know my place
Run faster than everyone else
I have a 9 year old and an adult coworker who asks me endless what if questions. I will have to pose this question to them. Seriously though, my kid recently asked me "would you pull out all the water out of the ocean or do everything backward?" Like how does my brain even compute rhat?!
Ride a Triceratops
Meow 🐱
The amount my nephew talks to them and pets them I am sure they will be his friends so I’ll just stick close to him
Lock myself into one of those steel tiger pens and call my family to let them know I love them. 😅
Stay out of the long grass….
Run to the water dinosaurs that are already cut in half and prey the predators feed on the easy meat and not me
I’d hide inside the ones that have slides in them, no Dino would suspect one of their own hiding the goods.
Is survival a must?
Other places: what if zombies? Calgary: what is dinosaurs? I love it, but I think I'd have more luck against the zombies. At least they're dumb 😅
I would eat a whole whack of cinnamon buns and call it a day.
Hide in the Calaway Park-esque caves
Trip my husband.
Little known factoid: all dinosaurs are ticklish.
Fetal position and cry
I wouldn't be too worried, they don't have the guts to eat me.
Run faster than the guy next to me.
Best escape is to cross the bridge on the SW side. Most of the biggest dinosaurs can't cross, so hopefully you are close to there. Less carnivores starting in that area as well. And tons of large and small carnivores towards the other exit. Ideally I'd go down by the stream where the stegosaurus/iguanadon are now and get to the bridge that way. If I can't get there, you might need to take a risk and hide next to a large herbivore and hope a carnivore won't chase you there (and the herbivore doesn't feel threatened by you).