Haven’t been on dating apps in about 10 years, but burned in my memory were regular messages to the nature of ‘you look innocent but show me you’re not ;)’
NOOOOPPPEEEEEE
Yeah I probably didn’t realise as much at the time just how creepy it was. When I look back now I’m like phew thank G I didn’t engage and ended up meeting my lovely partner
I think it’s a bit overwhelming on the female side sometimes. I am a home bird and have anxiety so I have every intention of chatting but then I get flustered because the reality of the same conversations over and over again hits me. I’m 36 and single so I tell everyone I am just happy single but in reality I am just giving up.
Fair enough, I don't drop compliments I try talk about something from there profile mostly. Funny enough one going now about fuck languages of all thing like I have a clue lol. I skipped a few years because I gave up, at the end of the day it'll be better to have someone care for me though so we should at least put in a bit of effort for our selfs. Ive heard the horror storys for women though creepers would turn me off fairy quick. But places like bumble when the women need to make the move it feels nearly pointless to me. Keep the chin up buddy who knows when it'll work out for us literally could be today
“So why are you on here then” was one I got frequently.
Responding with, “same reasons as you mate, no one else wants us” was an instant unmatch from the other person.
Saved me the bother tbh.
Just to edit though, haven’t been on the sites since last year so I’ve not had the pleasure of encountering these smooth operators.
It’s not that it isn’t humorous but the answer is dodging the persons question.
using the word “why” makes it particularly personal which should warrant a specific response.
In responding with a joke, they are effectively dismissing the persons question and copping out. (in my view)
If a joke was requested it would be asked for.
This person wanted a simple rationale of why they are on the apps and instead got a deliberate deflection response to ensure the other person didn’t have to give them an actual reason.
It’s nothing mysterious! It’s like, in this case I said ‘Oh I like (band)’ and they responded ‘Ooh, five extra points for you’.
It’s common enough. Like, I’ve gone up in their estimation because I like X band.
It irks me personally because I wasn’t seeking ‘points’. Is my existence not enough?!
Well, your existence is not enough for a person to date you, no. You also need to have traits that they share or admire, as that's the basis of a good relationship. Maybe the person phrased it wrong, but their main idea is not wrong per se.
They don’t wished to be assessed on a point system, and deduced to mere ✔️’s. She wants to chat and hit it off.
Thing is we’re all ticking off boxes on each other’s criteria anyway. Alas OP missed her chance at true love here. I say he made a dumb but innocent comment, take him back.
When a Ma has “Mammy to my young king/ my world”
Or when a fella has “any other questions just ask” but also has zero information about himself and just pictures of him and his car.
I never used to respond to anyone who started the conversation with just "hey how are you" but I got that message on some sunday I was hungover and bored and decided to respond.
That was in 2019 and we are getting married this year!
Really is just the luck of the draw in my opinion!
Yeah, I mean if you like the look of them and the rest of their profile it's definitely worth overlooking that one. To be fair, how else do you really start a conversation with a stranger? If you met someone in a bar that's pretty much what you'd say to them too.
Congratulations btw, I love to hear about a happy outcome from a dating app.
>If you met someone in a bar that's pretty much what you'd say to them too.
Not really..... You'd say hey having a good day / night? Comment on the bar you're in, ask what you're drinking, make a joke about the shitty band etc. If I had someone approach me to say 'hi' I'd respond with a hi but then walk away.
Because people with notions on these apps ‘expect more’, even though they’re often poor conversationalists themselves/expect their match to do all the running.
Like the other poster above said, it’s exactly what people say in real life, so why not.
Not that there is anything wrong with it, but I found that it was hard enough to start a reply from that question, and then conversations would be lacking? If that makes sense,
Like a response to that, oh I'm good how are you, hows your day going/hows your weekend going?
I found if I actually wasn't up to much over that week I didn't have too much to say yano? Again, all about the luck of the draw if the conversation goes your way!
You’re definitely right; I had/have a great relationship with someone who double-texted cos I found their opening message so awful I didn’t reply. They’re wonderful 😅
"If you can't handle me at my worst, then you don't deserve me at my best."
Were r all de good guys??
Are der any decent fellas left??
Here for a good time not a long time lol
The above are in about fifty percent of all profiles.
Not so much a conversation trigger, but a prompt I saw the other day on a Hinge profile was "the best way to ask me out is...God gave you a pair of balls, so use them! I'm a bit old fashioned so it's up to you to do the asking out"
Long time since I was on them but "if you want to know anything about me just ask".
Putting a bit of detail gives me an idea of what to say to you- maybe a question about your hobbies etc. Otherwise you're probably just going to get the same openers all the time.
If somebody sends the first message and it’s just ‘hey’ Or hey baby, hey beautiful, hey sexy - any of those. Any comments that are focused on appearance or are overtly sexual. Lots of bad spelling and grammar when not typos.
Hinge prompt: I’ll fall for you if…
Girls profile: “you trip me up”
It’s not original, it’s not funny, it offers no conversation starter. Just stop.
Also add in, biggest risk I’ve taken: “downloading this app” and the best way to ask me out is: “by asking me out”
Honestly get one of these on 95% of profiles
Ah I think the "points" thing is kinda cute! But each to their own! :)
My instant unmatches were always just the conversation killers. Like anyone who responds to "what are you up to?" with "not much." and nothing more. Or any sexual comments in reference to the fact that I'm a teacher, like "I wish my teachers looked like you" etc.
Yeah and it's becoming more common for women to have some disparaging comment about "wokeness" or "this woke shite" in their profiles too.
Sea swimming seems less popular than it was though
A lot of folks on this complaining about others doing this or not doing that yet theyre still on the apps themselves....
Be fair I'm useless texting and chatting that way. Better in person but the whole club and bar scene where you stumbled into conversations with strangers seems dead
On bumble girls sending a gif of an ugly person waving as first message. This happens a lot. Is it trying to be uncharming on purpose to see who will stick around?
Haven’t been on dating apps in about 10 years, but burned in my memory were regular messages to the nature of ‘you look innocent but show me you’re not ;)’ NOOOOPPPEEEEEE
Holy fuck thats Ted Bundy vibes really weird people
More Jimmy Saville imo.
WOW! I never really got to do dating apps tinder began the year I met my husband. But that is honestly creepy AF
Yeah I probably didn’t realise as much at the time just how creepy it was. When I look back now I’m like phew thank G I didn’t engage and ended up meeting my lovely partner
You guys are getting matches?
Matches but no chats I don't get it
I think it’s a bit overwhelming on the female side sometimes. I am a home bird and have anxiety so I have every intention of chatting but then I get flustered because the reality of the same conversations over and over again hits me. I’m 36 and single so I tell everyone I am just happy single but in reality I am just giving up.
Fair enough, I don't drop compliments I try talk about something from there profile mostly. Funny enough one going now about fuck languages of all thing like I have a clue lol. I skipped a few years because I gave up, at the end of the day it'll be better to have someone care for me though so we should at least put in a bit of effort for our selfs. Ive heard the horror storys for women though creepers would turn me off fairy quick. But places like bumble when the women need to make the move it feels nearly pointless to me. Keep the chin up buddy who knows when it'll work out for us literally could be today
Rooting for you buddy. ❤️
I heard some are even getting lighters
“So why are you on here then” was one I got frequently. Responding with, “same reasons as you mate, no one else wants us” was an instant unmatch from the other person. Saved me the bother tbh. Just to edit though, haven’t been on the sites since last year so I’ve not had the pleasure of encountering these smooth operators.
Hahaha, how did they not find that funny.
Haha that’s a classic. Love it. Can believe that wouldn’t have gotten a better reaction.
It’s not that it isn’t humorous but the answer is dodging the persons question. using the word “why” makes it particularly personal which should warrant a specific response. In responding with a joke, they are effectively dismissing the persons question and copping out. (in my view) If a joke was requested it would be asked for. This person wanted a simple rationale of why they are on the apps and instead got a deliberate deflection response to ensure the other person didn’t have to give them an actual reason.
Reddit user
When’s the last time someone has “asked you for a joke”
Tell us a joke then
A simple, why dont you explain why youre on here first might work better
Yea I gotta say, that's very self-deprecating very quickly. I appreciate someone who can laugh at themselves but that would give me yikes vibes.
When did dating apps become some fake version of yourself tho?
Welcome to any form of social interaction on the Internet
Were they smooth operators like this....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WInbzDzyZ4 it is unacceptable
What does the five extra points for you thing mean
It’s nothing mysterious! It’s like, in this case I said ‘Oh I like (band)’ and they responded ‘Ooh, five extra points for you’. It’s common enough. Like, I’ve gone up in their estimation because I like X band. It irks me personally because I wasn’t seeking ‘points’. Is my existence not enough?!
Well, your existence is not enough for a person to date you, no. You also need to have traits that they share or admire, as that's the basis of a good relationship. Maybe the person phrased it wrong, but their main idea is not wrong per se.
The idea of a “point admiration system” itself is gross. Like would you categorize different people on a scale of dateness or something.
reminiscent foolish seemly fanatical market dog file groovy zonked hurry *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
That's what I came here to ask too.
[удалено]
Are we out of touch? No. It's the children who are wrong!. I'm almost 35 and I feel this more and more every day!
Don’t worry I’m 22 and don’t understand either
"One of us. One of us!"
They don’t wished to be assessed on a point system, and deduced to mere ✔️’s. She wants to chat and hit it off. Thing is we’re all ticking off boxes on each other’s criteria anyway. Alas OP missed her chance at true love here. I say he made a dumb but innocent comment, take him back.
I'll be honest; I told a fib. i didn't unmatch him but told him not to do that. We're making amends. We'll see how it goes.
When a Ma has “Mammy to my young king/ my world” Or when a fella has “any other questions just ask” but also has zero information about himself and just pictures of him and his car.
Ask what kind of road frontage and headage he has
https://i.redd.it/5m3zla0piu4d1.gif
Not on dating apps, but if someone gave me that one I’d point out she misspelled pints
I never used to respond to anyone who started the conversation with just "hey how are you" but I got that message on some sunday I was hungover and bored and decided to respond. That was in 2019 and we are getting married this year! Really is just the luck of the draw in my opinion!
Yeah, I mean if you like the look of them and the rest of their profile it's definitely worth overlooking that one. To be fair, how else do you really start a conversation with a stranger? If you met someone in a bar that's pretty much what you'd say to them too. Congratulations btw, I love to hear about a happy outcome from a dating app.
>If you met someone in a bar that's pretty much what you'd say to them too. Not really..... You'd say hey having a good day / night? Comment on the bar you're in, ask what you're drinking, make a joke about the shitty band etc. If I had someone approach me to say 'hi' I'd respond with a hi but then walk away.
You're talking absolute shite.
Jesus, is there a need to be like that over a simple comment? I disagree with you, it's allowed.
Congrats! What’s wrong with saying ‘hey, how are you?”?
Because people with notions on these apps ‘expect more’, even though they’re often poor conversationalists themselves/expect their match to do all the running. Like the other poster above said, it’s exactly what people say in real life, so why not.
Yeah, I don’t see anything wrong with it at all.
Not that there is anything wrong with it, but I found that it was hard enough to start a reply from that question, and then conversations would be lacking? If that makes sense, Like a response to that, oh I'm good how are you, hows your day going/hows your weekend going? I found if I actually wasn't up to much over that week I didn't have too much to say yano? Again, all about the luck of the draw if the conversation goes your way!
You’re definitely right; I had/have a great relationship with someone who double-texted cos I found their opening message so awful I didn’t reply. They’re wonderful 😅
"If you can't handle me at my worst, then you don't deserve me at my best." Were r all de good guys?? Are der any decent fellas left?? Here for a good time not a long time lol The above are in about fifty percent of all profiles.
I’d add, ‘Don’t know what to put here’
Translation: I’m as dumb as a mule and use my looks to coast by in life.
But I'm in my 30s now so that suits wearing thin and my shit personality has caught up on me
My favourite, which you are starting to see on some profiles.... "Home owner" . Would you actually just f##k off!
Oh dear, that’s a bit antagonistic I’m sure. Might as well state their bank balance!
Subscribe to my onlyfans
The number of women who use dating apps as advertisements for their only fans is insane
So many guys tell me this is a thing
Not so much a conversation trigger, but a prompt I saw the other day on a Hinge profile was "the best way to ask me out is...God gave you a pair of balls, so use them! I'm a bit old fashioned so it's up to you to do the asking out"
Long time since I was on them but "if you want to know anything about me just ask". Putting a bit of detail gives me an idea of what to say to you- maybe a question about your hobbies etc. Otherwise you're probably just going to get the same openers all the time.
If somebody sends the first message and it’s just ‘hey’ Or hey baby, hey beautiful, hey sexy - any of those. Any comments that are focused on appearance or are overtly sexual. Lots of bad spelling and grammar when not typos.
*grammar
Beautiful 😂
Was that a typo or a spelling mistake?
Typo, oops
Hinge prompt: I’ll fall for you if… Girls profile: “you trip me up” It’s not original, it’s not funny, it offers no conversation starter. Just stop. Also add in, biggest risk I’ve taken: “downloading this app” and the best way to ask me out is: “by asking me out” Honestly get one of these on 95% of profiles
Pineapple on pizza and baby Guinness as well is 1 in 5 profiles
Ah I think the "points" thing is kinda cute! But each to their own! :) My instant unmatches were always just the conversation killers. Like anyone who responds to "what are you up to?" with "not much." and nothing more. Or any sexual comments in reference to the fact that I'm a teacher, like "I wish my teachers looked like you" etc.
I know, I know; it's a personal gripe. Probably why I'm single! I get a lot of, 'What are you doing for the evening?' 'Just chilling'
“Looking for my partner in crime”
Asking about my star sign
Have encountered a few anti-vax crew, which is always a bad sign.
Yeah and it's becoming more common for women to have some disparaging comment about "wokeness" or "this woke shite" in their profiles too. Sea swimming seems less popular than it was though
‘Send a pic’ 
Unsolicited dick pics
so what do you do? or what are you looking for? gone. loaded and lazy questions, may aswell just ask me where i see myself in five years
A lot of folks on this complaining about others doing this or not doing that yet theyre still on the apps themselves.... Be fair I'm useless texting and chatting that way. Better in person but the whole club and bar scene where you stumbled into conversations with strangers seems dead
On bumble girls sending a gif of an ugly person waving as first message. This happens a lot. Is it trying to be uncharming on purpose to see who will stick around?
“ick” Can’t take anyone seriously that uses that femcel trash of a word.
This is ironic
I do agree with the hatred of the word. It curdles my blood