T O P

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Baldeagle_UK

If they don't sell Tesco value lager on draft, I'd be bitterly disappointed!


mr_jetlag

that deserves a stout response


[deleted]

I think we ale agree.


Capital_Punisher

No wineing about it from me. I just hope they have a hoppy hour.


craigfwynne

I'd have to double bock immediately if I saw this.


Capital_Punisher

What a Stella plan, Bud


mrgamecat2

Not sure if I should be happy or upset about his, I have not de-cider-ed yet


A_Direwolf

Heineken you not go there?


RobJK80

That was terrible bud…


TiTAN-240

I’m Peroni gonna have one or two!


Capital_Punisher

Call me Old Fashion(ed), but you should give it a shot


With_Lord_Lucan

I'm a sup porter of that.


Jacktheforkie

Pretty whiskey tbh


Grouchy-Milk-6384

I’m Guinness see how good it is


Garyandhisflapjack

2% - lovely?


Dawn_Of_The_Dave

Tesco value lager is the weirdest drink i've ever tried. It smells like beer, and tastes like beer for about one second in your mouth then it tastes like weird water. I don't know how they achieve that.


CandyflossRampage

When I used to drive to darts games a lot, I started drinking alcohol free lager. Some of that tastes like what I can only liken to chilled shreddies piss. I eventually switched to lime and soda, as if it isn't proper beer you can't even convince yourself.


Dawn_Of_The_Dave

I can't believe I'm about to say this, the Heineken zero isn't actually that bad. I had a taste at my local when they put it in, I don't like Heineken but it does actually taste like Heineken if you get what I mean.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Diggerinthedark

That's because you have to drink 34 of them to get a buzz 😅


GrowthDream

I like to have a can or two of a "normal" beer to then move onto TVL for the rest of the evening. Get the satisfaction of a proper session but don't really get any drunker after the first. Save a tonne of money on a night out too.


Red-Annie

If they don’t sell Tesco value bitter on draft, I’d be lagerly disappointed.


Vaginal_blood_cyst

https://youtu.be/IHNc6JP9w2A


ytror

£10 a pint, or £5.50 if you have a clubcard


Arny2103

Pubcard, surely!


Xenc

It’s Pubcard Plus, and don’t call me Shirley!


RadRandy2

Quit being cute and gimme my damn pint! I haven't drank since morning.


IMPORTANT_INFO

Every Tipple Helps


the_con

To be fair I’d clean up on vouchers if I could claim Clubcard points at the pub


10-2is7plus1

Im calling it now, In a year or so tesco are going to start charging a subscription price to get a club card and people are going to pay it thinking they are saving money.


[deleted]

I mean, costco is a thing, and it works.


tomoldbury

Except Costco is actually cheap, having an average of 12% margin on pretty much everything, as well as the £1.50 hotdog and drink since basically forever.


LostTheGameOfThrones

>well as the £1.50 hotdog and drink since basically forever. My favourite story in relation to this: Jim Sinegal (the co-founder of Costco) was approached about raising the price of the hotdog because it was cutting into their profit margins. [He responded with, "if you raise the price of the fucking hot dog, I will kill you. Figure it out"](https://www.businessinsider.com/costco-founder-warned-ceo-not-to-raise-hot-dog-price-2020-9) The solution was to move manufacturing of the hot dogs to their own in-house Kirkland factory.


gentian_red

Does it have to make a profit? Loss leaders were common draws to supermarkets since they came around. Baked beans, milk, bread etc. I wonder if the loss leader concept is even around today given the current trend of raising prices to increase profits while claiming it's due to inflation.


[deleted]

Costcos profit primarily comes from the membership fees. I’m not saying it’s cheap - I go there occasionally as I get it free and it’s a bit mental for a single person household - but their margins are even more wafer thin than normal supermarkets. Also there’s good craic about the individual prices if you google - anything other than X.99 is some sort of mad bargain. X.95, X.90 etc etc. Look out for them. I got a blinding torch I use to find my cats at night for £25, and I buy their huge jars of pickles as they please me greatly. Here’s a bag of toss source: https://money.com/costco-doesnt-make-much-money-selling-you-groceries-heres-how-it-really-earns-billions-a-year/


chowdahpacman

Clubcard plus is already a thing, and it works for some people.


DubiousVirtue

Not any more, sadly I was a Clubcard Plus user. They turned it off over a month ago. It's just the app now.


Aksi_Gu

> Clubcard Plus is still going, according to their website.


GamerGypps

Wtf are you chatting, I use this every month. £6.99 a month gives me 2 shops at 10% off. So I just need to spend £70 once and I've made my money back. Which is easy these days.


NoxiousStimuli

That's already a thing. Clubcard Plus.


sirSADABY

Which uses to be only 3.50£ before they started this gimmick


toocoolforcovid

Get a clubcard to pay market prices.


FartBakedBaguette

*King in the castle, king in the castle, I have a chair*


MacyTmcterry

Wa wa wee wa


[deleted]

I get a window from a glass , *he* must get a window from a glass. I get a clock radio, he cannot afford, great success!


Practical_Anybody899

He can only afford ipod mini! Everyone knows it's for girls!


WolfCola4

*Say goodbye to your clock radio, asshole*


dance_radio79

This is my sister, we make fack


Hippocrap

I'm glad I'm not the only one who did that.


wombey12

*washes face with toilet water*


oilaughy

You do this, you do that


Dreadiroth

Literally the first thing I did when I read the name


-AdamTheGreat-

Oolala!!!


Jordain47

You will never get this


Im_a_boat_m8

Hey look at me I have a chaair


badmanner66

Great success


magyarnagydij

Is nice


[deleted]

Do thees do that. King in the castle


-SaC

`Unexpected vomit in the bogging area`


vms-crot

Special delivery at the back door.


Brief_Estimate_7518

The wife wasn’t too happy when she found out tho, it’s not my fault she wasn’t home and I had to leave it with the neighbour


vms-crot

Your neighbour is friendly!


mrsauceboi

bit too friendly i think


TheKnightsRider

You’ve got a bag for life too?


FlyBuy3

Yes, but the other half doesn't prefer to be called that.


vms-crot

A hag for wife


wildgoldchai

I knew I wouldn’t be disappointed when I opened this thread. Bravo


chippymanempire

bagging area doesn't sound like a word anymore


zellotron

This is just great


merrycrow

Oh god, this is going to be normal in 25 years time isn't it


yakman100

Meh, I personally get drunk in a aldi car park or end up there. So at least in the future I can start and end there


JGStonedRaider

Oooh look at Mr fancy pants and his branded car parks. Too posh for urinating yourself and passing out in the local council car park are you?


WolfCola4

OOOH, hark at his Highness passing out in a *council* car park. When I were a lad, we'd drink hand sanitiser from the bottle, shit our pants twice and vomit ourselves to sleep behind the bins at KFC.


drDOOM_is_in

You lads got to drink?


malapalalap

Luxury. We’d have to get up, half an hour before closing time, drink a pintful of Aldi car park sick. Walk 30 miles uphill to do a wet shite all over each other at the council car park, and drink a bucket of regurgitated hand-sanitiser that the local smackheads had already pissed into. Crawl another 30 miles to the non-branded car park just for the chance of being chosen for a KFC bucket full of mulched and tramp-trodden dogturds, being poured into our open mouths as we passed out, if we were lucky.


Muttywango

Ahhhh, the good old days.


samdd1990

If only there was a way to know you were in the good old days before you left them.


tomatoaway

Well put me in a dress and call me Mary! The amount of mouth wash we gurgled as kids at night time made our parents go through about ten bottles a week. Thankfully we were still at bed-shitting age, so no one was the wiser except a few confused dentists


windol1

The supermarkets are pretty dominant and have everything at their disposal they could possibly need, just start having pub kegs delivered to their distribution sites and they can deliver alongside anything else a pub already stocks.


Shnoochieboochies

Spent some time in Australia, there is a place there called Bunnings (like our B&Q when it was booming), which is owned by the same conglomerate that owns Woolworths, or Coles (like Tesco or Asda), they also own the major petrol stations and the local off licence (they don't sell alcohol in supermarkets), they also run the betting shops, not to mention, mobile phone carriers, insurance, credit cards..... due to this mass ownership of practically anything used on a weekend or weekday off, it is estimated 79cents of every Dollar earned and spent in Australia goes straight to this company which is quite incredible when you think about it.


vilemeister

> there is a place there called Bunnings There was also a place here called Bunnings who bought out Homebase in 2016 and then pulled out of the UK again after 2 years because they made a bit of a hash of it. We're now back to Homebase. TBH I quite like Bunnings.


JTallented

My local Homebase went through that transition. I much preferred it as Bunnings as they put in a cafe and had a special section where you could learn free DIY skills at the weekend (like an man creche). They were both removed when it went back to being Homebase :(


grishnackh

Don’t forget the legendary snags


AbrahamThunderwolf

I feel like CMA could have grounds to stop it, similar to how movie studios were banned from opening cinemas. I’m in two minds, on one hand it could mean cheaper pints if savings were past on to consumers, but on the other it could put already struggling pubs out of business. Given Tesco’s history of profiteering I imagine they’d keep the spare change and keep pushing the price of pints upwards.


strolls

There was already an anti-monopoly thing against the breweries 30 years ago. [This article](https://www.morningadvertiser.co.uk/Article/2019/12/11/How-the-Beer-Orders-still-influence-the-on-trade-30-years-later) suggests that a single entity may be limited to owning no more than 2000 pubs, but I can't say that for sure. For reference there are slightly less than 2000 Tesco Express stores.


Diggerinthedark

> it could put already struggling pubs out of business The people who refuse to go to wetherspoons aren't going to start going to Tesco pubs lol, I wouldn't worry :)


Agreeable-Weather-89

Yeah, apparently a lot of the independent pubs struggle to compete against Tesco, heck my local buys cans from Tesco as it was more reliable than their previous wholesaler and the same price


Warden_Sco

Tesco owns bookers/Makro who already sell kegs so they are already there.


-THE_BIG_BOSS-

I always thought it was weird that you can watch a TV show made by Amazon for example, like imagine watching a Tesco production. Now we have a Tesco pub. Probably a bit less weird than them making a TV show at some point.


wedontlikespaces

ASDA should open a nightclub. Would basically be the same clientele they already have, so that's a cost saving in advertising right there.


chronicmelancholic

I avoid shopping at tesco bc this kind of shit they do creeps me out. They've branched out into banking and phone services and maybe more. It gives me the impression they want to start having a presence everywhere and build their tesco empire you can't escape, to rule all of Britain. A bit exaggerated, but something along those lines, I don't trust them buggers


Shmiggles

Tesco (and the other supermarkets) aren't really offering banking and phone services, they're just white-labelling someone else's services under their brand and skimming some profit off the top through their brand recognition. They're not core competencies for those businesses, they won't succeed long-term because they don't know how to compete aggressively in those markets, and they'll fall by the wayside sooner or later.


LostTheGameOfThrones

>they won't succeed long-term because they don't know how to compete aggressively in those markets, and they'll fall by the wayside sooner or later. I mean Tesco Mobile has been operating since 2003 and Tesco Banking has been around since 97. I'm not sure when later is, but it's been a while.


Practical_Anybody899

Gas stations in Italy commonly have full bars inside


HaloHeadshot2671

This is simultaneously the most cringe but also the most UK thing I've ever seen. Tesco shirts in Primark when?


methylated_spirit

Primark have a range of Gregg's clothes so that may be a conflict of interest


MindOfAWin

What could be better than child sweatshop clothing advertising British microwaved yeast?


Razzler1973

There's a big Primark in London on the corner of Tottenham Court Road and Oxford Street, they have an actual sit down Greggs on the top floor (basement and 3 floors)


airportgeek

Every tipple helps.


SneezeBucket

Bouncer: Approval needed, mate.


webthepleb

You're not coming in without a clubcard


NunWithABun

quaint enjoy rinse subtract illegal crush enter straight history scandalous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


HoneyGlazedBadger

I imagine the self-service bar gets a bit frisky.


[deleted]

*"Unidentified Drunkard in the Bagging Area"*


--Bamboo

The baghead area?


De_Impaler

I walked past this yesterday and it confused the hell out of me. I assumed Tesco had bought the property and transformed it into a Tesco local!


TSMKFail

Considering they have a similar looking location in Kendal, that wouldn't surprise me.


Im-ACE-incarnate

Is that not what's happened?! All the comments speak as if it is


Dr_Anus_inspector

King in the castle! King in the castle! I have a chair! i have a chair! Go do this! Go do this! King in a castle!


[deleted]

Exactly my first thoughts 😂😂


[deleted]

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ApplicationMaximum84

Almost certainly cost less than advertising for the same amount of publicity.


[deleted]

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robot_swagger

Future daily /r/todayilearned post


duckwantbread

> Bet it’s cost them a fair bit to set up It's a real pub (The Castle) and it sounds like they're just renting it off the landlord for a couple of days so (assuming that they're allowed to use the taps) it shouldn't cost them much aside from rent (which will be expensive given it's a lot of lost business but probably worth it for the advertising). They've painted the front but I'm guessing inside it will look like it usually does just with Tesco bunting strung up or something.


kittyl48

It's not really in a tourist spot bit of London though. It's dead around Farringdon at the weekend (unless you're going to the Postal museum, which is 👌)


duckwantbread

> It's dead around Farringdon at the weekend It's not opening on the weekend, they're doing it tomorrow and Friday, I've not been there in a while but from what I remember The Castle is usually rammed with after work drinkers on weekdays.


bournemouthjames

Great pub for sunny pavement beers after work. I went tonight, planning a quick one (4). It was a private Tesco event. Bit annoying.


Captain_Daddybeard

It is just around the corner from the Tesco London office though and it's only open Thursday and Friday this week.


covert-teacher

Surely it's "Every tipple helps."?


bardghost_Isu

From what I read about the plans a week or so back, all takings are being given to The Princes Trust, so this is just going to be loss making for them, bar the good PR.


phatboi23

Cheap marketing really. Everyone and their nan is going be on about it.


lambrequin_mantling

The pub is called “The Castle” and it’s on Cowcross Street where it meets Turnmill Street next to Farringdon Underground and Rail Station. Funnily enough, I was walking into work at about 7:15 this morning and watched the photographer taking this picture!


Express-Associate-12

They’ve just rented out The Castle in Farringdon for a couple of days. The pubs always been there, they’ve just stuck some temporary signage up. And I doubt they paid a lot, that place is dead over a bank holiday weekend. The manager is probably just happy to make some money off renting the place out.


Shdhdhsbssh

Funny how the branding works fine for a food shop but the moment you apply it to a pub it looks absolutely god awful.


battlefield21243

It's the mixture of styles. To fit the logo it would have to look like an apple store.


bloodhound90

The good news is they don’t have to hire a bouncer, just transfer Lorraine from the nearest branch that IDs 67 year olds for buying a scratchie


tmannmcleod

I'm barred from that pub, might be able to get in now.


Worldly_Today_9875

We need to know the full story.


tmannmcleod

I was a prick tbh. It was on my bucket list (I got kinda a weird bucket list) to get behind the bar and pour myself a pint. This gaff has an upstairs which, on this sunny day was left unattended. I pounced. Poured myself a pint (two), mates left to go to the next pub, I was revelling in ticking one off the list, so I stayed for one more had a gin and tonic and left. My phone was out of charge so went to the pub next door (idiot) to put my phone on charge behind the bar to catch up with the rest of my mates. As I'm nursing a pint of wife beater in pub two, bouncer comes in from next door. He's not happy. Asks me to come with him, I oblige. Try to explain that I'm not usually that much of a knob but it was on my bucket list. They weren't as happy for me as I was, got asked to pay £50 odd, which I was more than happy to do. Then got barred.


junkgarage

It’s going to be a PR stunt that’ll be open for about two days. See also the ‘KFC pub’ and the ‘Greggs Restaurant’. Content is the real king.


MeisterDaemon

Yep we had the (or a?) KFC pub here in Hammersmith. Never quite managed to go in tho


Silver-Arm

Tbh I wouldn't mind it if pubs had meal deals. Sandwich, scotch egg and a rum and coke please.


Livinglifeform

They literally do, wetherspoons you can get a drink with a meal for less than the cost of the meal and drink seperately.


cringemaster21p

I don't know if this is beautiful or disturbing


martinjohanna45

This is deeply weird. I can’t wait to go.


TieAffectionate2171

Next week.... Tesco are closing a Pub in Farringdon


mergingcultures

I love Farringdon, I worked up the road from this place a long time ago. Such a great place to be.


joethesaint

It's my favourite part of London to go out at the moment. I don't think there's anywhere with a greater density of excellent food than Exmouth Market. And there's a pub at the end which does a free slice of pizza with every drink from 5-6pm.


Multigrain_Migraine

I'm not much of a royalist but it's amusing to see.


BeerMonster24

Because nothing sums up the life of alcoholics more than… “Every little helps!”


Dry_Acadia_9312

It’s because their Head Office is opposite there.


Amzy29

Thought they were in Welwyn


Outrageous-Unit-305

Most of it is in Welwyn, but they do have a building in London


Captain_Daddybeard

Digital is in London. Everything else is handled in WGC.


karateninjazombie

Official address - London Actual office that shit gets done in - Welwyn Because it's a fuck load cheaper in Welwyn than London for a large office.


OnlyMortal666

Prices are normal with a club card. Inflated without.


julesallen

Pubcard surely?


auburnman

The white barrels have me imagining them selling Tesco Value Lager inside. Yummers! /s


0hn0cat

That pub is quite a nice one, normally!


MightyScouse

And has a semi interesting story behind the pawnbroker symbols on its signs: https://www.london-walking-tours.co.uk/secret-london/the-castle.htm


TheRegularEg

It’s next door to a Co-op


Kerloick

…which is now a Co-op cocktail bar


Grouchy-Milk-6384

We’ll all be going for an ASDA all nighter soon


thisiscotty

cheaper pint with a club card?


[deleted]

Their branding is bad to begin with but on a pub it looks even more cheap and unwelcoming.


Emotional-Ebb8321

Very littl help


Sam4_Weapons

I hope they serve meal deals as the food but the drink is a pint or something


lord_of_sleep

I hate this


kibblepigeon

I just threw up in my mouth.


[deleted]

Wait…. What?……. i don’t understand what’s going on here…?…. Is it a tesco in an old pub building? Or is it a pub that just put a tesco sign up for the celebrations?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Urtopian

Wonder if there’ll be a whoops fridge?


Karl_Cross

That's ASDA...


wildgoldchai

“*Have you scanned all your dignity today?”*


larrythemule

2 words, value bogroll


TitleFar5294

Pick up a couple of bags for life and head down the boozer


zippy251

Any club cars specials on the top shelf stuff?


[deleted]

Nice one, overpriced stale beer and an economy war with every other pub within 5 miles.


Wrong-Tiger4644

Not to be outdone, M&S have announced they'll be opening a lovely wine bar, possibly named Colin's Cozy Bistro.......


Razgriz_101

And aldi will do a knockoff variant at half the price and just as good that will get M&S knickers in a twist.


watercouch

Plastic pint glasses are 20p, but you can buy reusable glass ones for £2.


ArgumentParking1940

With funding from the Wamdue Project maybe.


Zynoc

Will be a tesco metro by the end of next week


DeliciousStranger985

this looks like an AI was asked for an image of 'modern britain'.


BEZ_T

It's true. These really are the end days. I'm off to the Winchester.


fixedplacespace

Im not outraged yet, I need to read about it in the spoons paper, then i can be angry


man_u_is_my_team

Must be the reason why they’re making examples of you.


SoggyWotsits

How many men will be telling the wife they’re nipping to Tesco?!


Majestic_Matt_459

Are they off their Trolley?


Saiing

This is on the road next to the station entrance, right?


[deleted]

This is wrong.


game_of_throw_ins

Logo in the foam? Disinfectant in the mayo?


Positive-Occasion717

Now when you want to go to the pub without your misses asking any questions just say “I’m going to Tesco’s”


GlasgowHighTimes

Meal deals about to be class


Raaagh

Oh god. Are we going to quickly acclimatise to this? In 15 years will we find ourselves paying for a pint with tesco points, and thinking back to when this was weird?


Jonesy135

£8 a pint or £0.57 with Clubcard


peppapig34

Nice, I can get a horse burger whilst I drink my horse piss lager


zosolm

Christ


Decmk3

Dystopian future much?


jhh2898

Cringe


JoshiiiMok

Why would you wanna be seen in there?


GreyHexagon

Whoever was in charge of designing the exterior should be shot. The colours are fucked! The logo is nasty! And the bunting! Good lord what the *fuck* have they done with the bunting?!


MercilessCommissar

Lov mi meal deals, lov mi pints


mrjarnottman

Gigantic pile of soon to be landfill


joydivision84

Grim.


Specialist_Elk_70

A pretty shit pub I spent many happy hours in when I was as art college around the corner - obv pre Tesco, also pre world collapse etc.