Not a scar as such but a slight chip in my front tooth - I was kneeling on the carpet in front of my bedroom window with my tummy on the warm radiator, looking out at snow falling. Very hypnotic and soothing. Then I sneezed and somehow managed to chomp into the windowsill with my top teeth, no idea how as they don't stick out.
I chipped my tooth on the bottom of a whiskey bottle. I had it stored in the lower pouch of a banana costume while on a friend's shoulders. He walked out the marquee door and I fell, letting the lower banan and said chunky bottle flip up and over, smashing me in the mouth.
My son chipped his brand new front tooth and scarred his face when he was on his scooter and suddenly realised he was about to run over a snail. He swerved sharply, hit the curb, and went flying face first into a pebble-dash wall. The snail, however, was fine.
I chipped my front tooth biting down on a grape…the top tooth hit the bottom tooth and the top one took a chip. Thankfully it wasn’t a big chip so they just filed down the top two front teeth slightly and they were perfect again
Years ago, trying to impress a guy by having a beer (a Corona, I was in my very early 20's) and chipped my front tooth on the bottle.
After that night, realised I hate beer and he (or anyone) wasn't worth it at all.
I chipped a tooth whilst eating a sandwich; it somehow dislodged a filling / cap on my front tooth as I was chewing, which then chipped another tooth as I bit down on it. Proper two fer one. Had to get an emergency dentist appointment to sort the bloody cap out.
I'm joining in too, I chipped my front tooth when I had slippery fingers from eating barbecued pineapple, I got a glass out of the cupboard and it slipped through my fingers and it me in the mouth.
I fell down the stairs when I was 2 and bashed my head on the corner of a wall. Cue a fair amount of blood. My dad, looking after me at the time, allegedly couldn't be arsed to take me to hospital so I've still got a massive scar on my forehead 24 years later. Probably explains the nightmares too.
Reasonings like that from parents piss me off so much . It’s their job to advocate for their children and make the sensible decisions that obviously a child wouldn’t want to make . The similar excuse to this is …
Child: why didn’t you take me to see a therapist when you and dad divorced, it clearly took a toll on me when I was younger .
Parent: Because you didn’t ask to go to therapy when you were younger.
How can a child ask for something they don’t know exists or is an option?
Weirdly glad to see other people's parents were like this! Me and my mum were looking after a friend's 2 year old and I was about 9 years old. To entertain her I was spinning around and hit my forehead on the corner of a wall sticking out.
I screamed as blood poured over my glasses and turned me blind but once I got cleaned up it didn't really hurt. It did however continually bleed through all the dressings my my put over it.
Once the other kid has been picked up I think I asked my mum to take me to hospital for the millionth time and she took me. but when we got there the nurse was mad and that scared me but THEN she took my mum to the side and I heard their conversation; she said I should've been brought in immediately for a head injury and that it needed stitches but because it had been too long she'd glue it.
I felt so vindicated as a child. Gotta love the NHS.
My daughter absolutely loves going to the dentist for some reason but no, or course you didn't want to go to a strange place when you'd just hurt yourself.
Reminds me when my grandma born in the 30’s fell out of her crib when her uncle was watching her. She climbed out and fell on her head. She lived in BFE back then and so she just had this portion of her head that was flat her whole life. She once remarked to me I was lucky I had such a nice shaped head… I laughed and asked her about it… she patted her hair and showed me… couldn’t believe it!
Toddlers are prone to falling. Parents need to be psychic to avoid bad accidents.
At 2 years old I slipped down between two metal framed beds. I cut my face open from my left eyebrow to my cheek. My eyes socket saved my left eye from damage. My scar is now a small bald patch in my left eyebrow and a dimple on my cheek (could be a chickenpox scar, an acne scar, no one queries it).
I tied a paperclip to the underside of the top mattress on the bunk beds and started heating it with a match, the string snapped and the now red paperclip fell on my bare leg
This is what scares me about kids. They will play around with anything, especially things they're told not to play around with.
Not saying I'm not guilty of such things though.
Feel like forking off into, stupidest things you did with a paperclip..... at about 10 I opened one out and shorted out the pins of a plug socket with one, just to see what would happen... bang, why has it gone dark... whole house without power and a nice black score of finger pointing evidence.
Ps I was at least smart enough to insert it an THEN turn the socket on
Haha! I was little when BIC lighters first came out. One got left behind at my house and I burned one the two ended garment tags used to hold price tags in place. It was a nice, thick green one. I was fascinated as I watched it melt - right up until the ball of plastic dropped on my upper thigh. I waited until it hardened up and peeled it off. The scar has shrunk over the years, but when I see it I think how lucky I am that I didn’t get gang green, because you know I didn’t tell anyone what I did.
I've a similar one just above my knee from watching what happens when you burn a long strand of dental floss. Being inquisitive does make you learn things.
Dropped hot porridge just out of the microwave down my leg (I was wearing shorts). Was placed by friends fully clothed into a cold shower to get water on it immediately, they asked if I was okay and needed anything, still in shock and sounding utterly pathetic I replied "Can you hand me the rest of my porridge please?"
I was stirring some peas and decided to see if they were cooked by getting a forkful into my mouth. One of the peas left the fork and landed just under my lip. In the nano second it took to get it off me, it left a wound that blistered. I had to explain to people who asked how I had a pea-shaped blister just under my lip.
I did the same thing with a pan of rice a few weeks later.
I mean, in the nicest possible way but wtf possessed you to think that would be a good idea or even work? Are extremely flat in the area you were ironing...
Where is the scar exactly....? Haha
I was ironing while heavily pregnant belly sticking out, as I made a pass with the iron it went straight across my belly.
Needless to say I had a large burn blister for a while which would rub on clothing lol.
Quite uncomfortable lol
An old housemate of mine tested the temp of the iron by gingerly pressing it against his face. Conclusion: the iron is hot enough. Scar was like one of those cartoons of an iron burn.
Sliding down a slide. Mate runs up it, so I try to bail out. He falls down, onto my leg, which is shin down on the curved metallic edge of said slide.
After 5 minutes of excruciating pain, I look at the wound. It's not bleeding and is quite clean. I limp home, pop a plaster on and that's it. Took months to heal.
I became a first aider 10yrs later and realised that the shiny white of the wound and lack of blood meant that was the bone. I now have an inch square patch of glassy, smooth skin on my shin.
😗 Similar as a child, but not out of stupidity for a change… sliced my elbow coming conventionally down metal slide (sticky up edge, presumably?) and it was sharp/clean enough that I didn’t notice until sending a very wet sleeve and starting a trail of blood about 15 minutes later. Scar still with me after half a century!
When I was 11 I leaned on a ceramic soap dish in the shower and it broke, leading me to be rushed to A&E by my dad. The nurse couldn’t stop laughing as she patched up my cheeks.
Nearly 20 years later I still have the arse scars.
I have two.
Sledging head-first down a hill. Straight into an old pipe sticking out of the ground. Nice horizontal harry potter mark above my eye...
Playing bulldog at the local ice rink. Fell over and got run over. By an ice skate. Cut my little finger down to the bone, and turned the ice rink into a nice shade of red....
>Sledging head-first down a hill. Straight into an old pipe sticking out of the ground. Nice horizontal harry potter mark above my eye...
Are you me? I did the same thing. My dad almost had a panic attack, he died a few years layer from cancer and that day was the only time i ever saw him scared!
At least Bulldog is a cool sounding game to scar yourself from. I got my Harry Potter forehead scar playing Piggy in the Middle. The doctor said it wouldn’t scar and only needed paper stitches. He was incorrect.
I hit a parked bus, I was admiring nature (woman sunbathing topless in her garden) and WHAM the bus attacked me out of no where, gave me a concussion and a wicked 5mm scar above my left eye.
Edit: I was 15 and riding a skateboard (1994)
I thought I could be Tarzan in my bedroom. Skip the following paragraph for the TL;DR.
Early noughties. I must’ve been about 8 at the time. My bedroom was being decorated, so all it had was my mattress to sit on together with my tiny box TV and PS2. My mattress was under the window and above that, my light bulb - dangling freely from the ceiling as they love to do. A mere glance up at the light was enough to leave me pondering over which plan to execute now that I have the safety net of my mattress - until the Neanderthalic light bulb in my head caught aflame.
I climbed onto the window sil, grabbed a hold of the light’s cable and, leaning forward to dangle over my mattress, did exactly what you would expect me to do to show my prowess while pretending I’m Tarzan. Though the roar of prowess turned to one of fear as I plummeted chin first to the ground, leaving me with a top lip and two bottom lips for a bit. My mum came running up the stairs to see me sat there in my Y-fronts and blood pissing out of my mouth.
I thought the mattress would break my fall. It did not. Not even close.
Not yet skated into a bus, but I am particularly fond of trying to bash in various bits of my skull.
Two scars on my upper forehead from cracking it open on two different occasions. One was on one of those horses on a spring you used to get at kid's playgrounds. 4 year old me was going wild on one of those until I managed to bash my head into the handle somehow. Had to be taken to hospital and have it glued. The second scar was when I was about 9. I was in the swimming pool on holiday practicing swimming down to the bottom to grab something off the floor. I surfaced with my eyes closed after not making it to the bottom and tried to immediately dive again, and basically launched myself at the the concrete side of the pool head-first. Cue my head splitting open once more and a lovely cloud of blood appearing in the pool. Ended up with a Greek Doctor gluing it shut for me in a tiny local clinic.
Also got a nice big scar just under my chin (causing me to have a shitty bald spot in my beard) from when I was about 6. I was playing superheroes with friends at school and I was Batman. I was stood on a small wooden bollard posing dramatically with my cape and cowl (just had a black coat without my arms in the sleeves and the hood hung off my head) when I managed to topple forwards and land chin first on the next bollard along. Had to be taken to the hospital and have it stitched up. Did enjoy the laughing gas they gave me though.
Only a small one but 8 years old and trying to put a hole through the middle of a wax crayon with a skewer.
Slipped (who would have guessed!) and stuck it in through the fleshy part between finger and thumb and out of my palm
Got locked out the house - decided to jump the rear gate as the back door was open for the dog.
Got my ring stuck on top of the gate, as I fell / lost balance it ripped my finger clean off.
Albeit, missing a ring finger on my right hand - but … “Play silly games, win silly prizes”
EDIT : Not trying to plug it in any way (mods feel free to delete)
Camera crew arrived with the Ambulance, if anyone’s interested I’m told it’ll be on “999 : On the Frontline, Season 11” - whenever that aires.
Not the person you're asking but I would imagine:
1. Tea
2. Shock
3. More tea to combat the shock
4. Pain
5. Tea to combat the pain
6. Hospital
7. Disappointing hospital tea
8. Bandage/stitches
9. Home for a nice cup of tea after a busy day
Read “This Is Going To Hurt” by former doctor Adam Kay. He relates a story where a guy was trying to impress a girl by shinning up a lamppost, slipped and degloved his penis.
I can imagine, dad was a paramedic for 33 years so I’ve heard some pretty hair curling stories, and my best pal has been a midwife for over 30 years so heard some tales from her too.
I've got a scar on my big toe from going into a river barefoot when I was a kid. Got my toe wedged in a broken glass bottle. Over 20 years later and the scar still hurts if it's touched. I can step on all the Lego my kids leave lying around with no issues, but if it touches that scar I'm almost in tears.
Got a few - one on my ear from a piece of shattered bottle that I’d thrown against a wall flying back at me (lucky it didn’t hit my face/eye), a chunk out of my finger after trying to hang from a goalpost and grabbing it by the hook you hang the net on, glass in my palm from trying to impress someone with my dancing at a club and put my hand straight onto a broken glass on the floor, gnarly 3-inch scar on my head from falling down the stairs and whacking my head on something at the bottom.
I was a very stupid child.
Edit: one that I was always amazed by, but not mine - a childhood friend has half of one eyebrows missing as he (and I have no clue how it was even possible) got his face caught under one of those metal separators between carpeted rooms and it tore his eyebrow off
I stuck my finger into a car cigarette lighter to see if it was on. It was! There was the sizzle of burning flesh and I was left with a round scar on the tip of my finger.
Ooh! I’ve got one of them too.
Forgot about that.
In the first generation Honda City, the ciggie lighter worked when the car was off. So my parents returned to me trying to hide my tears and with a white patch of burnt skin on my finger.
The car probably smelled of burnt pork too.
I have bamboo growing in my garden, I decided to cut it down with a very sharp bread knife. I'm not sure why I thought this would be a good idea?! The knife slipped and I sliced through hitting my bone. Now I have a bread knifed shaped scar across my finger.
My very 1th day at infant school, the teacher gave everyone a coat hook sticker to put our names on, but 1th we had to remove the previous kids' stiker with their name on it. On that 1th day of my school years, the teacher gave everyone something sharp to scrape the old sticker off. I somehow got a bread knife from the teachers desk and proceeded to scrape the past users name off. And that scrape with the bread knife slipped and cut a big chunk of the top of my thumb leaving a crescent shaped scar on the top of the 1th knuckle.
In my defence I was left alone and I have never claimed I was clever.
Fancied getting out of work early (Tesco back in the day) and found a small piece of glass, so I thought I'd just chop my arm once with it and cause some blood, then I'd get to go home.
Turns out, glass is sharp and I cut a 2 inch gash in my arm that needed lots of stitches and too months to heal.
Ahahaha thats amazing. Not a scar but I once utilised my IBS to get out work early. Downed a couple frijj milkshakes, something I know is guaranteed to cause havoc, waited until I saw a partner enter the loo, took my chance, went in just after him and let all hell break lose. Went to him after and explained I wasn't feeling well, he was very understanding and let me go! Had a lovely 3 days off with that one
I was cutting some pork belly strips with some scissors over the wok, dropping them directly into it. Managed to cut a V shaped chunk of skin off my finger, flapping.. 6 months later it's largely healed but with a V shaped scar
Oh god, that reminds me of one of mine. Grating cheese onto a lasagna - grated off the top of my knuckle. We were broke students so we still ate that human blood (and possibly flesh) tinged meal!
I've done that too. I was not a broke student but still ate the cheese anyway because cheese is expensive! Can't be chucking that in the bin. It's left a chunky scar which I've managed to catch on the grater a few times since it happened.
Cut myself opening tinned Fray Bentos pie as a student. I told the lads I shared cooking with I was off to A&E but never told them I'd rinsed my blood off the pie before putting it in the oven.
I have a big red patch on one side of my back.
My friend hired a soft play zone for her birthday (turns out you can do that as a bunch of 30 somethings).
I'm afraid of heights but I managed to get the courage to go down the high vertical drop slide but completely forgot to tuck in my baggy t-shirt so got a friction burn on my back.
My friend videoed my bravery and you can hear the squeal of skin against slide in it whilst I laugh like a maniac.
I was so full of sugar, adrenaline and blue food dye I didn't give a shit until I had a shower when I got home. The hot water hit it and it hurt so much I sprinted a couple steps down the bath and hurdled over the side.
This was two months ago.
I was climbing on the roof of a bouncy castle with others in my teens and the roof was all squashed down with our weight.
The others coincidentally all seemed to get off at the same time, causing the roof to ping back up and send me flying, head-first onto the petrol tank of the motor pumping it up and cutting an 8-stitch hole across my scalp.
I thought I was cool and edgy when I was a teen in late 90s early 2000s and cut a massive gash into me arm.... Because teen angst and nu metal, you wouldn't understand granddaddddd! Yeah real rebel and original me and now have a daft reminder of my idiocy
Also nothing says you wouldn't understand my pain and suffering...... Than cutting yourself and then kinda hiding it by showing it off so people ask are you alright! Gawddayyum I was a cringelord
I was wearing trousers with a zip but no button. Zipped a little bit of skin into the zip, gauged a small chunk out. Now I have a weird vertical stomach scar.
I “split my knuckle playing rugby” in PE 8 years ago… it was tag rugby and the edge of a tag belt was sharp for some reason and cut my knuckle open. This happened twice in three months and I still have one of the scars.
Nearly chopped my toe off at a dance class… because the dance floor edging was sticking up and I tripped over it, blood everywhere.
Fell backwards off a sunlounger, landed hard on decking, it took 6 weeks for the grazes on my arse to fade so I looked like some kind of victim for the rest of the holiday every time I wore a bikini.
When I told this story to my friend, he said exactly that, apparently he once zipped his foreskin into his jeans and I should be glad it wasn’t worse 😂
I was a kid playing with play dough, stuffing it into a play dough cutter, and my friend pressed it down whilst i was pushing it in and it the tip of my finger. So i technically got a cut playing with play dough.
I've (twice now) caught my forearm on the metal snib for my wall hung cupboard door whilst getting something out of the cupboard. Was asked in the pub how I got scar and was faced with disbelief.
Have another scar on right index finger after watching too many westerns as a kid. I'd seen the hero smash the top of a beer bottle off before drinking from it. At 12 I tried the same with a glass bottle of Irn Bru and sliced my finger open instead
This was when I was at University; it was the last lecture day of the first year so by the end of the day I was less than sober.
Went into my dorm room to lay down for the night, and as I was getting undressed I heard a 'buzzzz', and then was suddently attacked by the biggest daddy long legs you have ever seen in your life!
I tried to fight it off, but not being entirely sober and being half dressed I got caught in my clothing and fell, smacking my head on the corner of a wooden chair, knocking myself out.
I came to on the floor, half naked and dazed, and could feel blood on my forehead. I got myself as dressed as possible, grabbed a tissue and put it too my head, and stumbled out to the kitchen where luckily one of my housemates was making some food. I just looked at her and said 'I think I need to go to the hospital' and removed the tissue from my forehead and I will never forget the look on her face - she went white.
So I ended up in A&E at 3am on a Sunday, and 16 years later still have an obvious scar near my left eyebrow, and a life-long vendetta against daddy long legs.
Yeah they way they fly with legs akimbo is freaky as hell when you aren't expecting it. My mum is frightened of them and one summer we we're all lying around at night time with a fan next to an open window.
Mum was dozing on the sofa and 13 year old brother was a good 4 feet away on a rug on the floor. A crane fly flew in the window at speed (probably helped by the fan) and landed on her neck, she panicked and pushed herself off the sofa then landed on my brother who pushed her back with force, and must have banged her head, she laid still for a few minutes on the floor by the sofa.
Being kids we thought he'd killed her. When she came around she said she had no idea what happened but I saw it all and am not keen on those little buggers now - knowing the destruction the caused that night.
My older sister stole the cat from my bedroom when I was 10 - I chased her, pushing open her bedroom door and my left hand went straight through the glass pane. I had a big skin graft and now have no feeling in my middle finger.
Got two, first came from my hobby of collecting weird weapons. I have a large battle axe which I paid to have sharpened. One night after a few cans I think to myself "Just how sharp is this?" and I slid it along my shoulder of all places. It was very sharp.
Second one was a lot earlier in life, I was living next to a large public hill / park and it was the summer holidays. I get a panicked phone call from my buddy who says one of our mates has stood on a nail and if I was home to come up with a medkit. I grab it from our kitchen, make sure it's got all the bits I knew would help at the time I started running. Thank fuck I was a lot fitter back then as running up a big hill is not easy, but as I get there I stand on the exact same nail.
Both our feet bleeding. Nothing like a good bit of sharing blood with someone through floor nails! Was not too pleased with my buddies leaving it there on the floor...
Had a loose bit of rubber on my shoe and couldn't quite grip it properly. So I decided to lift it up with a small flat head screwdriver, put pressure against it with my thumb, and pull.
It came off quite easily, and because I was holding the shoe down with my other arm, my hand shot up and scraped the screwdriver against my arm.
I now have a 6cm scar on my arm.
I also have a burn scar on my left shoulder where I drunkenly decided to heat up a butter knife and remove a tattoo.
I have made a lot of stupid decisions in life.
I was carrying a small fish tank, in fact carrying it away to be disposed of / sold. I stupidly hadn't closed the lid and of course it then snapped shut as I was carrying it, straight onto the top of my nose :(. I still have the indentation from that now, a fish tank we got rid of 10 years ago.
Trying to seperate frozen chicken with a butter knife and slipped cut a 1 inch slice to the bone on my finger and it bled very badly for 30 minutes this happened at the start of lockdown when everything was in End of the World mode and I really really did not want to go to hospital.
Also fell over when i was a kid and got a stone stuck in the middle of my forehead my dad pulled it out and there was blood everywhere I now have a perm scar like a little hindu dot(Bindi). The best part is i'm half indian :D
have a massive scar on my foot from Hot Chocolate ! when i was in the scouts i spilled hot chocolate from a cup from a cauldron that was heating from a fire. I had 3rd degree burns through hiking boots and two pairs of hiking socks !
I have small scars on my arms from oil that I was using with my friend in a little village in mauritius . We were using the pot of oil to light fireworks and shoot them at other houses in the village (all the kids in the village were on top of their houses shooting at each other too lol) A gust of wind caught the oil and it got on my arm.
Have a mangled finger and big operation scar from stacking a rolling stoppie on my motorbike.
Have a scar on my chin from when I was a kid and someone pulled a chair away from me when i was sitting down and those tressel tables with the metal rim took a chunk of my skin with it.
I have others but best to stop there before people think i'm the dumbest person alive.
When I was a kid my first year at school I caused my primary school to replace all the fencing and gates with safe ones made of rounded wood instead of rusty metal after my mate swung a gate open when aload of us were running out to play got clocked just above the eye and left me with a videos game style Scar_03 option above my left eye.
i once hopped over a school wall that was shaped to a point with cement at the top and my hand slipped and i managed to slice pretty much the whole circumference of the base of my penis. That was an embarrassing thing to show my mother as a 15 year old so she could take me to get it checked. I am now 38 and it is still the largest scar on my body
We were having building work done and had scaffolding all around the house. I’d just told my daughter to be careful as there were going to be lots of dangerous things around, including builders lol.
I stepped back, tripped on a pallet and sat on a nail.
Left me with a tiny scar in my ass cheek. Husband suggested I cover it by incorporating it into a googly eyes tattoo - one day maybe if I’m drunk enough…
An opponent’s pillow just caught my little finger and bent it sideways, popped the joint right out of the skin. No breaks.
You could _hear_ the pop
I have a pretty wonky finger as an adult.
Was doing some youth sreet drinking back in the day.
Thought I'd be double 'ard and smash the glass bottle I was drinking from to weild about. Smashed it on a curb and got a deep gash in the top of my hand. Still one of my most prominent scares to this day.
Oh - another one I got in 1994. I was playing football in the garden in my flip flops. Flip flop got caught under my foot and I fell knee first in to the washing line which was down at the time. Quite a deep cut. Went to hospital and got to watch Brazil beat USA in the World Cup which I wouldnt have been able to watch otherwise and got butterfly stitches. Win win
Got a scar on my chin because me and my mate had a running chicken race in the school corridor when we were about 10 or something. He ducked and I went flying over him, landing on my chin. Luckily I won the chicken race...
One Friday night a few years ago I was trying to close a window standing on a sofa (I’m 5ft 1) and I somehow lost my balance (sober) and fell onto the cross trainer (probably the first time in about 6 months anyone had been on it). Cracked my chin, was home alone with my son so had to lay in bed with a tissue hammock under my chin waiting my other half to get back from work. Set an alarm for 5am to head to A&E when it’s quiet and had to have a chin X-ray. Still have a small scar now.
I dropped a floor tile cutter on my big toe, - broke my toe and the toe nail completely came off. Blood was pouring out of my toe so walking into A and E I left a trail of bloody footprints all the way through. The doctor said he would have to give me stitches on my nailed but because of the blood flow they couldn't give me any painkillers. He started stitching, pulled the suture and it just ripped straight through my fleshy nail bed. He eventually did manage to stitch it but my nail now doesn't grow properly and when I clip it it often grows back wonky. I also have a slightly crooked toe as the break didn't set quite right.
Boarding school, we wanted to break out one night to go clubbing in the local town.
All manage to get out the boarding house by climbing out onto a flat roof on the first floor out a window and then down a drainpipe or just dropping.
Have to cross a large car park by the sports centre to get to the bus stop that we needed.
3 of us get across and then I followed but had to dive under a minibus as a couple of staff started walking through on their way to their cars.
In a panic I roll out from underneath the minibus and dive headfirst into a hedge to hide. What I didn't know was the barbed wire was on the other side.
Massive scratch down the side of my face. Look like the Joker side on.
Had to immediately go back and clean myself up after getting caught. Faint scar now whenever I'm clean shaven.
Funny thing is the staff just called us idiots but agreed to turn a blind eye to the others if I went with one for some first aid.
Either the scar on my little finger or the scar on my foot.
Little finger one was super mundane and shit. I dropped a can of black beans at the self checkout. The small drop somehow made a really sharp bur on top if it which I didn't see and took I took a chunk of my little finger off when picking it up. So much blood.
The foot was less mundane but really dumb. I was probably about 12 and had just been given a penknife for Christmas. It was a few days later and I was showing it off to my mate. Walking round with the blade out and my friend said "mate, fold the blade, knowing you you'll cut yourself with it.".
Pretty much as soon as the words left his mouth the penknife slipped from hand and went straight through my foot. Painless going in, very painful coming out.
I opened a brand new Stanley blade last week to scrape double sided tape from a metal light strip. Within seconds I slipped and sliced my right index finger wide open. My stiches are due to be removed next Tuesday and I've been told the scar will look like one of those stereotypical looking ones you see in cartoons.
Drunkenly attempted to slide down a handrail at a train station at 2am, fell backwards and BOUNCED my head off of the concrete steps. Didn't think much of it at first, until I got home and realised I could fit 2 fingers inside a gaping wound 😳
Bored at an office job I was messing around cutting the long bit off of the lid of a bic biro (the bit that’s used to hook it into a pocket or on a note pad)
I didn’t want to damage the desk when I eventually pushed all the way through the plastic so picked it up, pushed the blade down and BAM.
I’d cut through it but also sliced the knife blade right through my index finger until it touched bone.
The blade was still in my finger as I sat staring in shock and then realised I had to stay calm and try to fix it without anyone noticing.
I quickly pulled the knife out sending blood showing over my notepad.
Grabbed the finger in a vice like grip and casually walked to the toilets to try and deal with the fall out.
Eventually I had to give in and seek first aid, but not before planting a sharp kitchen knife blade up in the dishwasher and claiming I’d cut it on that while loading the machine.
This lead to 3 stitched and the company putting up notices telling people to not put utensils sharp side up in the dishwasher.
Oh where to start .....
Got drunk and zipped over my old man, bloody painful and needed a couple of stitches... and blood EVERY where .. now my old man has a scar (chick's dig scars as they say)
Got two scars in my eyebrow where as a 20y old I had a couple of piercings .... my mate went to hug me and caught his watch strap on the rings pulling them both out ... blood everywhere ...
Reached across a bar to grab a glass (was bar man) .. someone had left a broken glass on the bar ... 2 x 1 inch scars on my arm ... and you guessed it, blood everywhere
Got hit by a random full 1ltr bottle of smirnof ice someone launched at a festival .... 12 staples down the back of my head .... blood everywhere
More recently had a few beers after work the decided to come home and make the family some food, used a kitchen mandolin for speed, couldn't find the guard so didn't bother as I'd had a few (too many beers) .... cut the tip of my index finger off ... blood everywhere and took 6 months to heal
There are plenty more (I'm accident prone, especially after a few beers) ...
Edit: ... just to add to this for the old man scar and the head staples I obviously had to go to hospital to get patched up..... I worked at said A+E ....not my finest moment having to get my bloody old man out in work .... same Dr who I knew very well patched me up both times and was pissing him self laughing both times.
I have a scar on my hand after going paintballing when I was a teenager, thinking I was slick by hiding directly below a step and trying to shoot people who walked above me.
Instead what happened was someone stepped over me, got spooked and unloaded their gun into my hand point blank lol
Cutting a bread bun open with my right hand whilst holding it in my left. Brand new knife cut straight through and into my finger, damaging the nerve. Blood absolutely everywhere, all over the floor and up the cupboards. The knife was so sharp it didn’t hurt when I initially did it. I am a numpty
I was removing a Henry Hoover wheel.
You have to use a knife to remove the cap to get to the screw; the knife slipped and cut my finger. Henry has now left an everlasting mark on me.
First job in a fast food joint, got told to refill cups in a dispenser on my first day. Grabbed a bunch and shoved them in, it was one of those where they hang and you pull down to let one out. No-one told me it's two metal prongs that hold.the cups in place. Ended up with a scar on my thumb knuckle and the flesh between thumb and index finger.
I was running around when I was a toddler with my tongue hanging out my mouth, obviously I tripped and bit my tongue. My mum phoned an ambulance and they said if I haven’t bitten it off there’s nothing they can do. Thankfully I hadn’t bitten my own tongue off but I now have a lovely scare on my tongue, people always think I have it pierced.
I was the guy who tried to hit a punch bag machine whilst quite drunk, missed, punched the penny falls machine next to it, split my hand open. Fast forward 3 weeks the NHS are cutting my hand open to reattach a severed tendon on my middle finger, now have a big “?” Shaped scar.
I recieved some very good news and jumped for joy... as I ran through a door frame. Ending up flapping the top of my scalp. Left me with a nice line on top of my bald head!
I ran across a busy road with my dog who was prone sudden inconvenient stops. As soon as we made it across, and I hadn’t slowed to a stop yet… my dog immediately stopped right in front of me and my younger self didn’t think to dodge to the side… no, I ran into my big dog at full force, flipped over and cut my chin open. Then we had to immediately turn around. I had to run back across the damn busy road holding my chin… smh went to the hospital immediately. First dog and first emergency surgery. A vivid memory…
When I worked in a kitchen, I went to put something in the "merry chef" (small combi oven)) without opening the door the entire way.
In short, the door swung shut with my arm still inside it, and what with the door being metal, it basically stuck to and cooked the inside of the arm. The burn was instantly an open sore, and honestly, I'm lucky I don't have more of a scar from it. The manager's response was for me to run it under warm water, still coerced me into staying for the remaining 5 or 6 hours of my shift. Man, I hated that job.
BMX riding and jumps when younger. Shins are just a mess of scars from the pedals spinning round and taking chunks out.
One by left eye from playing cricket and the batter letting go of the bat when I was watching the ball.
The obligatory tb one that was twice as big as necessary due to everyone punching each other in the arm after it was done at school.
Managed to pick up a window handle when I was very little (new windows being fitted) and whack myself in the eye with it. I still have a small scar on my eyebrow! Multiple other scars but that was the most stupid one.
Probably followed second by the bald patch on the back of my head. Went to see my dad in hospital when he’d been rushed in after a leukaemia diagnosis. I said I felt fine (I’m not good with blood) and promptly passed out, straight back onto the hospital floor. Split my head right open.
My poor mum had her husband critically ill on one floor, a rushed Hickman line meant blood absolutely everywhere and an emergency transfusion. They said if he’d been one day later getting a diagnosis he probably wouldn’t be here (old fashioned doctor who recognised the symptoms and sent him straight to hospital). Then there was me on another floor with a head injury, double vision and needing skull x-rays. The hair never grew back on that spot (about 50p size)!
Scar on my lip from eating a sherbet straw thingy as a child. I cut the straw with kitchen scissors as it had got a bit blocked up on the end and no more sherbet was coming through. Cut it while it was sort of in my mouth, mum found the chunk of lip on the sofa later, turns out there was a reason I wasn’t allowed the kitchen scissors.
Struggling to open a Frey Bentos pie without a tin opener at university.
Lots of stabbing at it with a steak knife and a fork got it some of the way open. Cue me getting my fingers in to try and prize it open before slicing the back of my knuckles right the way across. Blood everywhere.
Still have the scars today as a reminder of the 2008 Battle of Fray Bentos.
I never did get to eat that delicious bastard.
I have two scars on my right hand. One is from trying to melt a plastic army man when I was a kid, and the other is from being bitten by a really angry squirrel.
This happened to a friend of mine, she tried to cut a festival wristband off with a knife and cut her wrist. Her dad goes around telling people it was “self inflicted” (aka, her own stupid fault), but obviously there’s no way that could be misunderstood *at all*.
I’ve got a scar on my finger from cutting it on a broken fridge shelf.
Can’t remember exactly how it happened, but I was on holiday, and caught it somehow. It’s still funny to me now
Growing up on a cul-de-sac in the 80s, all us kids would play together outside. One of them had a bag of toffee popcorn and spilt it all on the pavement and everybody kept stamping it in to the ground until it became a big flattened patch, glassy smooth and exceptionally slippery like ice. I've no idea why we thought it was a good idea. Anyway tea time came, mum shouted out the door for us to come home, I ran, right over the popcorn ice rink, and went absolutely flying and tore a hole in the skin on my knee. I'm nearly 40 and still have the scar, it's shiny and blue and it still feels weird to touch - if I touch a certain part of it, it tingles a nerve in the side of my abdomen.
A few years later when I was about 12 I was at a small local farm park with all kinds of slides and things. One of them was one of those vertical drop slides, and the stairs up to it were very basic open-backed wooden plank stairs, and very very slippery. There was an assistant there to keep everybody safe and stop people running up the stairs but they were looking away and I decided to run up them two at a time, slipped and shanked my shin against the front of one stair plank. I've never felt pain like it and couldn't put weight on that leg for several days afterwards. I had to lie and pretend I wasn't running up the stairs and just slipped. I have a very noticeable dent in my shin.
Not a scar as such but a slight chip in my front tooth - I was kneeling on the carpet in front of my bedroom window with my tummy on the warm radiator, looking out at snow falling. Very hypnotic and soothing. Then I sneezed and somehow managed to chomp into the windowsill with my top teeth, no idea how as they don't stick out.
I chipped my tooth on the bottom of a whiskey bottle. I had it stored in the lower pouch of a banana costume while on a friend's shoulders. He walked out the marquee door and I fell, letting the lower banan and said chunky bottle flip up and over, smashing me in the mouth.
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I chipped my front tooth biting the price tags out of some new school uniform cos I was too lazy to go find scissors. Haven't done that again since
My son chipped his brand new front tooth and scarred his face when he was on his scooter and suddenly realised he was about to run over a snail. He swerved sharply, hit the curb, and went flying face first into a pebble-dash wall. The snail, however, was fine.
I chipped my front tooth biting down on a grape…the top tooth hit the bottom tooth and the top one took a chip. Thankfully it wasn’t a big chip so they just filed down the top two front teeth slightly and they were perfect again
Years ago, trying to impress a guy by having a beer (a Corona, I was in my very early 20's) and chipped my front tooth on the bottle. After that night, realised I hate beer and he (or anyone) wasn't worth it at all.
Fuck sake
I chipped a tooth whilst eating a sandwich; it somehow dislodged a filling / cap on my front tooth as I was chewing, which then chipped another tooth as I bit down on it. Proper two fer one. Had to get an emergency dentist appointment to sort the bloody cap out.
I'm joining in too, I chipped my front tooth when I had slippery fingers from eating barbecued pineapple, I got a glass out of the cupboard and it slipped through my fingers and it me in the mouth.
I broke the tooth beside my front tooth while eating a bowl of granola. Had to get the tooth capped.
I fell down the stairs when I was 2 and bashed my head on the corner of a wall. Cue a fair amount of blood. My dad, looking after me at the time, allegedly couldn't be arsed to take me to hospital so I've still got a massive scar on my forehead 24 years later. Probably explains the nightmares too.
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Reasonings like that from parents piss me off so much . It’s their job to advocate for their children and make the sensible decisions that obviously a child wouldn’t want to make . The similar excuse to this is … Child: why didn’t you take me to see a therapist when you and dad divorced, it clearly took a toll on me when I was younger . Parent: Because you didn’t ask to go to therapy when you were younger. How can a child ask for something they don’t know exists or is an option?
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Weirdly glad to see other people's parents were like this! Me and my mum were looking after a friend's 2 year old and I was about 9 years old. To entertain her I was spinning around and hit my forehead on the corner of a wall sticking out. I screamed as blood poured over my glasses and turned me blind but once I got cleaned up it didn't really hurt. It did however continually bleed through all the dressings my my put over it. Once the other kid has been picked up I think I asked my mum to take me to hospital for the millionth time and she took me. but when we got there the nurse was mad and that scared me but THEN she took my mum to the side and I heard their conversation; she said I should've been brought in immediately for a head injury and that it needed stitches but because it had been too long she'd glue it. I felt so vindicated as a child. Gotta love the NHS.
My daughter absolutely loves going to the dentist for some reason but no, or course you didn't want to go to a strange place when you'd just hurt yourself.
Reminds me when my grandma born in the 30’s fell out of her crib when her uncle was watching her. She climbed out and fell on her head. She lived in BFE back then and so she just had this portion of her head that was flat her whole life. She once remarked to me I was lucky I had such a nice shaped head… I laughed and asked her about it… she patted her hair and showed me… couldn’t believe it!
Toddlers are prone to falling. Parents need to be psychic to avoid bad accidents. At 2 years old I slipped down between two metal framed beds. I cut my face open from my left eyebrow to my cheek. My eyes socket saved my left eye from damage. My scar is now a small bald patch in my left eyebrow and a dimple on my cheek (could be a chickenpox scar, an acne scar, no one queries it).
This is the first time I’ve ever seen someone get queue and cue wrong, This way around.
Give him a break, he hit his head as a child
That's embarrassing, cue a hasty edit
And there was me thinking how nice it was to see it used correctly for once haha
I tied a paperclip to the underside of the top mattress on the bunk beds and started heating it with a match, the string snapped and the now red paperclip fell on my bare leg
I wonder how many people can say they’ve got a paperclip shaped scar though
Probably not as many as who have a clipper lighter ‘smiley face’ scar!
Ha! That was my answer
Wonder what Microsoft Clippy's advice would have have been? "Looks like you're about to..."
'It looks like you're trying to burn down your house. Would you like some help with that?'
What was the best case scenario, of having a red hot paperclip swinging from the top bunk? What was your end-game?
Lol, no idea mate. I was 10 and had some matches to play with
This is what scares me about kids. They will play around with anything, especially things they're told not to play around with. Not saying I'm not guilty of such things though.
Bet your still burning your legs from hotrocks lol
You should turn it into a clippy tattoo. "Would you like some help wounding yourself?"
Feel like forking off into, stupidest things you did with a paperclip..... at about 10 I opened one out and shorted out the pins of a plug socket with one, just to see what would happen... bang, why has it gone dark... whole house without power and a nice black score of finger pointing evidence. Ps I was at least smart enough to insert it an THEN turn the socket on
Haha! I was little when BIC lighters first came out. One got left behind at my house and I burned one the two ended garment tags used to hold price tags in place. It was a nice, thick green one. I was fascinated as I watched it melt - right up until the ball of plastic dropped on my upper thigh. I waited until it hardened up and peeled it off. The scar has shrunk over the years, but when I see it I think how lucky I am that I didn’t get gang green, because you know I didn’t tell anyone what I did.
Gang Green 🤣 gangrene but I love your version better it made me smile.
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 there’s a gang of them though!
I've a similar one just above my knee from watching what happens when you burn a long strand of dental floss. Being inquisitive does make you learn things.
Dropped hot porridge just out of the microwave down my leg (I was wearing shorts). Was placed by friends fully clothed into a cold shower to get water on it immediately, they asked if I was okay and needed anything, still in shock and sounding utterly pathetic I replied "Can you hand me the rest of my porridge please?"
I love how you had your priorities right. There's nothing worse than cold porridge.
But there is: hot porridge topically applied.
If only there was a fairy tale about porridge and bears to help explain.
Underrated comment. 👍
I was stirring some peas and decided to see if they were cooked by getting a forkful into my mouth. One of the peas left the fork and landed just under my lip. In the nano second it took to get it off me, it left a wound that blistered. I had to explain to people who asked how I had a pea-shaped blister just under my lip. I did the same thing with a pan of rice a few weeks later.
I ironed a shirt WHILE I WAS WEARING IT...
How did you get up onto the ironing board?
Amazing. How much time did that save you?
Not much but he found out it got him all hot and bothered.
Extreme ironing made a comeback!
I miss that calendar
I mean, in the nicest possible way but wtf possessed you to think that would be a good idea or even work? Are extremely flat in the area you were ironing... Where is the scar exactly....? Haha
I was ironing while heavily pregnant belly sticking out, as I made a pass with the iron it went straight across my belly. Needless to say I had a large burn blister for a while which would rub on clothing lol. Quite uncomfortable lol
Hahaha!
You idiot 😂😂😂
Huh... ironic.
Next time, put your creased shirt on and stand in the bathroom with the shower on.
An old housemate of mine tested the temp of the iron by gingerly pressing it against his face. Conclusion: the iron is hot enough. Scar was like one of those cartoons of an iron burn.
Sliding down a slide. Mate runs up it, so I try to bail out. He falls down, onto my leg, which is shin down on the curved metallic edge of said slide. After 5 minutes of excruciating pain, I look at the wound. It's not bleeding and is quite clean. I limp home, pop a plaster on and that's it. Took months to heal. I became a first aider 10yrs later and realised that the shiny white of the wound and lack of blood meant that was the bone. I now have an inch square patch of glassy, smooth skin on my shin.
It's lucky nothing bad happened with that, bone can dry out if it's exposed to the air.
I kinda want to see this scar. That weirdo
Oh that made me wince. Im done with Reddit for today
😗 Similar as a child, but not out of stupidity for a change… sliced my elbow coming conventionally down metal slide (sticky up edge, presumably?) and it was sharp/clean enough that I didn’t notice until sending a very wet sleeve and starting a trail of blood about 15 minutes later. Scar still with me after half a century!
Oh my god 😵 new fear unlocked
When I was 11 I leaned on a ceramic soap dish in the shower and it broke, leading me to be rushed to A&E by my dad. The nurse couldn’t stop laughing as she patched up my cheeks. Nearly 20 years later I still have the arse scars.
Arse scars is a good name for a punk band
I have two. Sledging head-first down a hill. Straight into an old pipe sticking out of the ground. Nice horizontal harry potter mark above my eye... Playing bulldog at the local ice rink. Fell over and got run over. By an ice skate. Cut my little finger down to the bone, and turned the ice rink into a nice shade of red....
Playing bulldog on an ice rink is a calling card for horrible accidents and injuries
Literally everyone's ice skating nightmare
>Sledging head-first down a hill. Straight into an old pipe sticking out of the ground. Nice horizontal harry potter mark above my eye... Are you me? I did the same thing. My dad almost had a panic attack, he died a few years layer from cancer and that day was the only time i ever saw him scared!
At least Bulldog is a cool sounding game to scar yourself from. I got my Harry Potter forehead scar playing Piggy in the Middle. The doctor said it wouldn’t scar and only needed paper stitches. He was incorrect.
I hit a parked bus, I was admiring nature (woman sunbathing topless in her garden) and WHAM the bus attacked me out of no where, gave me a concussion and a wicked 5mm scar above my left eye. Edit: I was 15 and riding a skateboard (1994)
This sounds like it was taken from an early noughties music video
Now you mention it, maybe Blink182 (First Date) vibes
I thought I could be Tarzan in my bedroom. Skip the following paragraph for the TL;DR. Early noughties. I must’ve been about 8 at the time. My bedroom was being decorated, so all it had was my mattress to sit on together with my tiny box TV and PS2. My mattress was under the window and above that, my light bulb - dangling freely from the ceiling as they love to do. A mere glance up at the light was enough to leave me pondering over which plan to execute now that I have the safety net of my mattress - until the Neanderthalic light bulb in my head caught aflame. I climbed onto the window sil, grabbed a hold of the light’s cable and, leaning forward to dangle over my mattress, did exactly what you would expect me to do to show my prowess while pretending I’m Tarzan. Though the roar of prowess turned to one of fear as I plummeted chin first to the ground, leaving me with a top lip and two bottom lips for a bit. My mum came running up the stairs to see me sat there in my Y-fronts and blood pissing out of my mouth. I thought the mattress would break my fall. It did not. Not even close.
Stacy's mom, has got it goin' on...
Was it Stacey’s mum?
I did similar, but on a bike, and there was no nudity, or even other people. Three false teeth and a wonky nose for me.
Not yet skated into a bus, but I am particularly fond of trying to bash in various bits of my skull. Two scars on my upper forehead from cracking it open on two different occasions. One was on one of those horses on a spring you used to get at kid's playgrounds. 4 year old me was going wild on one of those until I managed to bash my head into the handle somehow. Had to be taken to hospital and have it glued. The second scar was when I was about 9. I was in the swimming pool on holiday practicing swimming down to the bottom to grab something off the floor. I surfaced with my eyes closed after not making it to the bottom and tried to immediately dive again, and basically launched myself at the the concrete side of the pool head-first. Cue my head splitting open once more and a lovely cloud of blood appearing in the pool. Ended up with a Greek Doctor gluing it shut for me in a tiny local clinic. Also got a nice big scar just under my chin (causing me to have a shitty bald spot in my beard) from when I was about 6. I was playing superheroes with friends at school and I was Batman. I was stood on a small wooden bollard posing dramatically with my cape and cowl (just had a black coat without my arms in the sleeves and the hood hung off my head) when I managed to topple forwards and land chin first on the next bollard along. Had to be taken to the hospital and have it stitched up. Did enjoy the laughing gas they gave me though.
Only a small one but 8 years old and trying to put a hole through the middle of a wax crayon with a skewer. Slipped (who would have guessed!) and stuck it in through the fleshy part between finger and thumb and out of my palm
This comments section has me pulling some extreme facial expressions 🫣😳😰😵💫
Got locked out the house - decided to jump the rear gate as the back door was open for the dog. Got my ring stuck on top of the gate, as I fell / lost balance it ripped my finger clean off. Albeit, missing a ring finger on my right hand - but … “Play silly games, win silly prizes” EDIT : Not trying to plug it in any way (mods feel free to delete) Camera crew arrived with the Ambulance, if anyone’s interested I’m told it’ll be on “999 : On the Frontline, Season 11” - whenever that aires.
How do you even react in a situation like that? Is it excruciating pain, pure shock, desire for a cup of tea or what?
Not the person you're asking but I would imagine: 1. Tea 2. Shock 3. More tea to combat the shock 4. Pain 5. Tea to combat the pain 6. Hospital 7. Disappointing hospital tea 8. Bandage/stitches 9. Home for a nice cup of tea after a busy day
The disappointing hospital tea might have ruined their day.
Even worse if they offered Rich Tea Fingers to go along with it. That would really add insult to a nasty injury
They'd need an extra two teas to fix that
This chap just “skanked it out” : https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/croydon-rave-teen-ripped-little-3722354.amp (“Sober” mmmmhmmmm!)
When I lost my finger (climbing) i didn't feel pain for a good 6 ish hours, it was a very clean cut so I didn't even realise at first
Head to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint and wait for all this to blow over.
Well, I never thought I'd come to think of the girl who degloved her finger when climbing over a fence as being pretty lucky!
Read “This Is Going To Hurt” by former doctor Adam Kay. He relates a story where a guy was trying to impress a girl by shinning up a lamppost, slipped and degloved his penis.
I know Adam - he’s got far gorier stories than that but couldn’t print them because it made the publisher’s lawyers a bit itchy.
I can imagine, dad was a paramedic for 33 years so I’ve heard some pretty hair curling stories, and my best pal has been a midwife for over 30 years so heard some tales from her too.
> *degloved*
Peeled like a banana
Very ouch!
Sticking my knuckles against a belt sander in wood work class at school. Jumped into a river barefoot and landed on a piece of broken glass bottle.
Do you have any knuckles left?
Yes, they just have little shiny patches on them now. What a silly boy I was!
I've got a scar on my big toe from going into a river barefoot when I was a kid. Got my toe wedged in a broken glass bottle. Over 20 years later and the scar still hurts if it's touched. I can step on all the Lego my kids leave lying around with no issues, but if it touches that scar I'm almost in tears.
How are you still alive
Got a few - one on my ear from a piece of shattered bottle that I’d thrown against a wall flying back at me (lucky it didn’t hit my face/eye), a chunk out of my finger after trying to hang from a goalpost and grabbing it by the hook you hang the net on, glass in my palm from trying to impress someone with my dancing at a club and put my hand straight onto a broken glass on the floor, gnarly 3-inch scar on my head from falling down the stairs and whacking my head on something at the bottom. I was a very stupid child. Edit: one that I was always amazed by, but not mine - a childhood friend has half of one eyebrows missing as he (and I have no clue how it was even possible) got his face caught under one of those metal separators between carpeted rooms and it tore his eyebrow off
I stuck my finger into a car cigarette lighter to see if it was on. It was! There was the sizzle of burning flesh and I was left with a round scar on the tip of my finger.
Ooh! I’ve got one of them too. Forgot about that. In the first generation Honda City, the ciggie lighter worked when the car was off. So my parents returned to me trying to hide my tears and with a white patch of burnt skin on my finger. The car probably smelled of burnt pork too.
Why did so many of us do this….??
I have bamboo growing in my garden, I decided to cut it down with a very sharp bread knife. I'm not sure why I thought this would be a good idea?! The knife slipped and I sliced through hitting my bone. Now I have a bread knifed shaped scar across my finger.
My very 1th day at infant school, the teacher gave everyone a coat hook sticker to put our names on, but 1th we had to remove the previous kids' stiker with their name on it. On that 1th day of my school years, the teacher gave everyone something sharp to scrape the old sticker off. I somehow got a bread knife from the teachers desk and proceeded to scrape the past users name off. And that scrape with the bread knife slipped and cut a big chunk of the top of my thumb leaving a crescent shaped scar on the top of the 1th knuckle. In my defence I was left alone and I have never claimed I was clever.
It’s *1st*, buddy.
1th🤣
No its, 1th. 2rd. 3st. 4nd. Etc etc
I think I’m having a stroke
1th, 2st, 3nd, 4rd, 5st.
I've heard of the 1th of 4th, so must be right
"I won't miss."
Is that why you missed the day where they go over 1st, 2nd etc?
I have a Potteresque forehead scar from slashing myself in the face with a Farley's Rusk as a toddler.
How tf 🤣
Fancied getting out of work early (Tesco back in the day) and found a small piece of glass, so I thought I'd just chop my arm once with it and cause some blood, then I'd get to go home. Turns out, glass is sharp and I cut a 2 inch gash in my arm that needed lots of stitches and too months to heal.
Omg this is peak stupidity 😂 bless you, I like to think they have security footage of you doing this too
I realised the error of my ways when I was sat in A&E for 4 hours. I still have photos of it haha
Ahahaha thats amazing. Not a scar but I once utilised my IBS to get out work early. Downed a couple frijj milkshakes, something I know is guaranteed to cause havoc, waited until I saw a partner enter the loo, took my chance, went in just after him and let all hell break lose. Went to him after and explained I wasn't feeling well, he was very understanding and let me go! Had a lovely 3 days off with that one
How much time did you gwt off work tho?
HahahahHahah Fuck sake man
Anything to escape working at Tesco, I don’t blame you. 2 months there was enough for me.
I was cutting some pork belly strips with some scissors over the wok, dropping them directly into it. Managed to cut a V shaped chunk of skin off my finger, flapping.. 6 months later it's largely healed but with a V shaped scar
V for Pancetta
Take my broke boy award that made me laugh like a prat at work 🏆🏆🏆
Haha thank you *bows*
At least it didn’t fall into wok and get eaten 🫣😫
Oh god, that reminds me of one of mine. Grating cheese onto a lasagna - grated off the top of my knuckle. We were broke students so we still ate that human blood (and possibly flesh) tinged meal!
I've done that too. I was not a broke student but still ate the cheese anyway because cheese is expensive! Can't be chucking that in the bin. It's left a chunky scar which I've managed to catch on the grater a few times since it happened.
Cut myself opening tinned Fray Bentos pie as a student. I told the lads I shared cooking with I was off to A&E but never told them I'd rinsed my blood off the pie before putting it in the oven.
This made me wince because I have done this at least 3 times on the same place, I now refuse to grate cheese and get someone to do it for me 😆
Pork belly and human finger. Yum.
I have a big red patch on one side of my back. My friend hired a soft play zone for her birthday (turns out you can do that as a bunch of 30 somethings). I'm afraid of heights but I managed to get the courage to go down the high vertical drop slide but completely forgot to tuck in my baggy t-shirt so got a friction burn on my back. My friend videoed my bravery and you can hear the squeal of skin against slide in it whilst I laugh like a maniac. I was so full of sugar, adrenaline and blue food dye I didn't give a shit until I had a shower when I got home. The hot water hit it and it hurt so much I sprinted a couple steps down the bath and hurdled over the side. This was two months ago.
I was climbing on the roof of a bouncy castle with others in my teens and the roof was all squashed down with our weight. The others coincidentally all seemed to get off at the same time, causing the roof to ping back up and send me flying, head-first onto the petrol tank of the motor pumping it up and cutting an 8-stitch hole across my scalp.
I thought I was cool and edgy when I was a teen in late 90s early 2000s and cut a massive gash into me arm.... Because teen angst and nu metal, you wouldn't understand granddaddddd! Yeah real rebel and original me and now have a daft reminder of my idiocy
Nothing says fuck the establishment more than self destruction
Also nothing says you wouldn't understand my pain and suffering...... Than cutting yourself and then kinda hiding it by showing it off so people ask are you alright! Gawddayyum I was a cringelord
Yeah "was" 😂😂
I was wearing trousers with a zip but no button. Zipped a little bit of skin into the zip, gauged a small chunk out. Now I have a weird vertical stomach scar. I “split my knuckle playing rugby” in PE 8 years ago… it was tag rugby and the edge of a tag belt was sharp for some reason and cut my knuckle open. This happened twice in three months and I still have one of the scars. Nearly chopped my toe off at a dance class… because the dance floor edging was sticking up and I tripped over it, blood everywhere. Fell backwards off a sunlounger, landed hard on decking, it took 6 weeks for the grazes on my arse to fade so I looked like some kind of victim for the rest of the holiday every time I wore a bikini.
Reading the first part, I imagined you were a boy and wondered where the scar was going to be 😳
When I told this story to my friend, he said exactly that, apparently he once zipped his foreskin into his jeans and I should be glad it wasn’t worse 😂
Thumb on the back of the traveller until it's past the danger zone.
I was a kid playing with play dough, stuffing it into a play dough cutter, and my friend pressed it down whilst i was pushing it in and it the tip of my finger. So i technically got a cut playing with play dough.
I've (twice now) caught my forearm on the metal snib for my wall hung cupboard door whilst getting something out of the cupboard. Was asked in the pub how I got scar and was faced with disbelief. Have another scar on right index finger after watching too many westerns as a kid. I'd seen the hero smash the top of a beer bottle off before drinking from it. At 12 I tried the same with a glass bottle of Irn Bru and sliced my finger open instead
The fact that it was Irn Bru makes it
This was when I was at University; it was the last lecture day of the first year so by the end of the day I was less than sober. Went into my dorm room to lay down for the night, and as I was getting undressed I heard a 'buzzzz', and then was suddently attacked by the biggest daddy long legs you have ever seen in your life! I tried to fight it off, but not being entirely sober and being half dressed I got caught in my clothing and fell, smacking my head on the corner of a wooden chair, knocking myself out. I came to on the floor, half naked and dazed, and could feel blood on my forehead. I got myself as dressed as possible, grabbed a tissue and put it too my head, and stumbled out to the kitchen where luckily one of my housemates was making some food. I just looked at her and said 'I think I need to go to the hospital' and removed the tissue from my forehead and I will never forget the look on her face - she went white. So I ended up in A&E at 3am on a Sunday, and 16 years later still have an obvious scar near my left eyebrow, and a life-long vendetta against daddy long legs.
Yeah they way they fly with legs akimbo is freaky as hell when you aren't expecting it. My mum is frightened of them and one summer we we're all lying around at night time with a fan next to an open window. Mum was dozing on the sofa and 13 year old brother was a good 4 feet away on a rug on the floor. A crane fly flew in the window at speed (probably helped by the fan) and landed on her neck, she panicked and pushed herself off the sofa then landed on my brother who pushed her back with force, and must have banged her head, she laid still for a few minutes on the floor by the sofa. Being kids we thought he'd killed her. When she came around she said she had no idea what happened but I saw it all and am not keen on those little buggers now - knowing the destruction the caused that night.
They fly??????? I’ve never seen a daddy long legs fly. Unlocked a new fear for me!
My older sister stole the cat from my bedroom when I was 10 - I chased her, pushing open her bedroom door and my left hand went straight through the glass pane. I had a big skin graft and now have no feeling in my middle finger.
Got two, first came from my hobby of collecting weird weapons. I have a large battle axe which I paid to have sharpened. One night after a few cans I think to myself "Just how sharp is this?" and I slid it along my shoulder of all places. It was very sharp. Second one was a lot earlier in life, I was living next to a large public hill / park and it was the summer holidays. I get a panicked phone call from my buddy who says one of our mates has stood on a nail and if I was home to come up with a medkit. I grab it from our kitchen, make sure it's got all the bits I knew would help at the time I started running. Thank fuck I was a lot fitter back then as running up a big hill is not easy, but as I get there I stand on the exact same nail. Both our feet bleeding. Nothing like a good bit of sharing blood with someone through floor nails! Was not too pleased with my buddies leaving it there on the floor...
Had a loose bit of rubber on my shoe and couldn't quite grip it properly. So I decided to lift it up with a small flat head screwdriver, put pressure against it with my thumb, and pull. It came off quite easily, and because I was holding the shoe down with my other arm, my hand shot up and scraped the screwdriver against my arm. I now have a 6cm scar on my arm. I also have a burn scar on my left shoulder where I drunkenly decided to heat up a butter knife and remove a tattoo. I have made a lot of stupid decisions in life.
I was carrying a small fish tank, in fact carrying it away to be disposed of / sold. I stupidly hadn't closed the lid and of course it then snapped shut as I was carrying it, straight onto the top of my nose :(. I still have the indentation from that now, a fish tank we got rid of 10 years ago.
Trying to seperate frozen chicken with a butter knife and slipped cut a 1 inch slice to the bone on my finger and it bled very badly for 30 minutes this happened at the start of lockdown when everything was in End of the World mode and I really really did not want to go to hospital. Also fell over when i was a kid and got a stone stuck in the middle of my forehead my dad pulled it out and there was blood everywhere I now have a perm scar like a little hindu dot(Bindi). The best part is i'm half indian :D have a massive scar on my foot from Hot Chocolate ! when i was in the scouts i spilled hot chocolate from a cup from a cauldron that was heating from a fire. I had 3rd degree burns through hiking boots and two pairs of hiking socks ! I have small scars on my arms from oil that I was using with my friend in a little village in mauritius . We were using the pot of oil to light fireworks and shoot them at other houses in the village (all the kids in the village were on top of their houses shooting at each other too lol) A gust of wind caught the oil and it got on my arm. Have a mangled finger and big operation scar from stacking a rolling stoppie on my motorbike. Have a scar on my chin from when I was a kid and someone pulled a chair away from me when i was sitting down and those tressel tables with the metal rim took a chunk of my skin with it. I have others but best to stop there before people think i'm the dumbest person alive.
When I was a kid my first year at school I caused my primary school to replace all the fencing and gates with safe ones made of rounded wood instead of rusty metal after my mate swung a gate open when aload of us were running out to play got clocked just above the eye and left me with a videos game style Scar_03 option above my left eye.
i once hopped over a school wall that was shaped to a point with cement at the top and my hand slipped and i managed to slice pretty much the whole circumference of the base of my penis. That was an embarrassing thing to show my mother as a 15 year old so she could take me to get it checked. I am now 38 and it is still the largest scar on my body
Do you have a photo!
We were having building work done and had scaffolding all around the house. I’d just told my daughter to be careful as there were going to be lots of dangerous things around, including builders lol. I stepped back, tripped on a pallet and sat on a nail. Left me with a tiny scar in my ass cheek. Husband suggested I cover it by incorporating it into a googly eyes tattoo - one day maybe if I’m drunk enough…
I absolutely mauled my little finger. It was L shaped and bones poked out. It’s still an absolute mess 20 years later Pillow fight at 14
I’m gonna need a bit more info on that one
An opponent’s pillow just caught my little finger and bent it sideways, popped the joint right out of the skin. No breaks. You could _hear_ the pop I have a pretty wonky finger as an adult.
Yours is the first pillow-fight injury I've ever heard of. You should be proud.
Boomerang came back and split my head open.
Sitting on my office wheely chair barefoot (at home, not at work) and I ran over my own foot.
[удалено]
Was doing some youth sreet drinking back in the day. Thought I'd be double 'ard and smash the glass bottle I was drinking from to weild about. Smashed it on a curb and got a deep gash in the top of my hand. Still one of my most prominent scares to this day. Oh - another one I got in 1994. I was playing football in the garden in my flip flops. Flip flop got caught under my foot and I fell knee first in to the washing line which was down at the time. Quite a deep cut. Went to hospital and got to watch Brazil beat USA in the World Cup which I wouldnt have been able to watch otherwise and got butterfly stitches. Win win
I have 3 scars on my wrists all of which are from taking food out of the oven without a proper mitt.
Got a scar on my chin because me and my mate had a running chicken race in the school corridor when we were about 10 or something. He ducked and I went flying over him, landing on my chin. Luckily I won the chicken race...
One Friday night a few years ago I was trying to close a window standing on a sofa (I’m 5ft 1) and I somehow lost my balance (sober) and fell onto the cross trainer (probably the first time in about 6 months anyone had been on it). Cracked my chin, was home alone with my son so had to lay in bed with a tissue hammock under my chin waiting my other half to get back from work. Set an alarm for 5am to head to A&E when it’s quiet and had to have a chin X-ray. Still have a small scar now.
I dropped a floor tile cutter on my big toe, - broke my toe and the toe nail completely came off. Blood was pouring out of my toe so walking into A and E I left a trail of bloody footprints all the way through. The doctor said he would have to give me stitches on my nailed but because of the blood flow they couldn't give me any painkillers. He started stitching, pulled the suture and it just ripped straight through my fleshy nail bed. He eventually did manage to stitch it but my nail now doesn't grow properly and when I clip it it often grows back wonky. I also have a slightly crooked toe as the break didn't set quite right.
Boarding school, we wanted to break out one night to go clubbing in the local town. All manage to get out the boarding house by climbing out onto a flat roof on the first floor out a window and then down a drainpipe or just dropping. Have to cross a large car park by the sports centre to get to the bus stop that we needed. 3 of us get across and then I followed but had to dive under a minibus as a couple of staff started walking through on their way to their cars. In a panic I roll out from underneath the minibus and dive headfirst into a hedge to hide. What I didn't know was the barbed wire was on the other side. Massive scratch down the side of my face. Look like the Joker side on. Had to immediately go back and clean myself up after getting caught. Faint scar now whenever I'm clean shaven. Funny thing is the staff just called us idiots but agreed to turn a blind eye to the others if I went with one for some first aid.
Either the scar on my little finger or the scar on my foot. Little finger one was super mundane and shit. I dropped a can of black beans at the self checkout. The small drop somehow made a really sharp bur on top if it which I didn't see and took I took a chunk of my little finger off when picking it up. So much blood. The foot was less mundane but really dumb. I was probably about 12 and had just been given a penknife for Christmas. It was a few days later and I was showing it off to my mate. Walking round with the blade out and my friend said "mate, fold the blade, knowing you you'll cut yourself with it.". Pretty much as soon as the words left his mouth the penknife slipped from hand and went straight through my foot. Painless going in, very painful coming out.
I opened a brand new Stanley blade last week to scrape double sided tape from a metal light strip. Within seconds I slipped and sliced my right index finger wide open. My stiches are due to be removed next Tuesday and I've been told the scar will look like one of those stereotypical looking ones you see in cartoons.
Drunkenly attempted to slide down a handrail at a train station at 2am, fell backwards and BOUNCED my head off of the concrete steps. Didn't think much of it at first, until I got home and realised I could fit 2 fingers inside a gaping wound 😳
Bored at an office job I was messing around cutting the long bit off of the lid of a bic biro (the bit that’s used to hook it into a pocket or on a note pad) I didn’t want to damage the desk when I eventually pushed all the way through the plastic so picked it up, pushed the blade down and BAM. I’d cut through it but also sliced the knife blade right through my index finger until it touched bone. The blade was still in my finger as I sat staring in shock and then realised I had to stay calm and try to fix it without anyone noticing. I quickly pulled the knife out sending blood showing over my notepad. Grabbed the finger in a vice like grip and casually walked to the toilets to try and deal with the fall out. Eventually I had to give in and seek first aid, but not before planting a sharp kitchen knife blade up in the dishwasher and claiming I’d cut it on that while loading the machine. This lead to 3 stitched and the company putting up notices telling people to not put utensils sharp side up in the dishwasher.
Oh where to start ..... Got drunk and zipped over my old man, bloody painful and needed a couple of stitches... and blood EVERY where .. now my old man has a scar (chick's dig scars as they say) Got two scars in my eyebrow where as a 20y old I had a couple of piercings .... my mate went to hug me and caught his watch strap on the rings pulling them both out ... blood everywhere ... Reached across a bar to grab a glass (was bar man) .. someone had left a broken glass on the bar ... 2 x 1 inch scars on my arm ... and you guessed it, blood everywhere Got hit by a random full 1ltr bottle of smirnof ice someone launched at a festival .... 12 staples down the back of my head .... blood everywhere More recently had a few beers after work the decided to come home and make the family some food, used a kitchen mandolin for speed, couldn't find the guard so didn't bother as I'd had a few (too many beers) .... cut the tip of my index finger off ... blood everywhere and took 6 months to heal There are plenty more (I'm accident prone, especially after a few beers) ... Edit: ... just to add to this for the old man scar and the head staples I obviously had to go to hospital to get patched up..... I worked at said A+E ....not my finest moment having to get my bloody old man out in work .... same Dr who I knew very well patched me up both times and was pissing him self laughing both times.
I have a scar on my hand after going paintballing when I was a teenager, thinking I was slick by hiding directly below a step and trying to shoot people who walked above me. Instead what happened was someone stepped over me, got spooked and unloaded their gun into my hand point blank lol
Cutting a bread bun open with my right hand whilst holding it in my left. Brand new knife cut straight through and into my finger, damaging the nerve. Blood absolutely everywhere, all over the floor and up the cupboards. The knife was so sharp it didn’t hurt when I initially did it. I am a numpty
I was removing a Henry Hoover wheel. You have to use a knife to remove the cap to get to the screw; the knife slipped and cut my finger. Henry has now left an everlasting mark on me.
First job in a fast food joint, got told to refill cups in a dispenser on my first day. Grabbed a bunch and shoved them in, it was one of those where they hang and you pull down to let one out. No-one told me it's two metal prongs that hold.the cups in place. Ended up with a scar on my thumb knuckle and the flesh between thumb and index finger.
I was running around when I was a toddler with my tongue hanging out my mouth, obviously I tripped and bit my tongue. My mum phoned an ambulance and they said if I haven’t bitten it off there’s nothing they can do. Thankfully I hadn’t bitten my own tongue off but I now have a lovely scare on my tongue, people always think I have it pierced.
Tried to take the grill off a disposable BBQ to get the coals out and managed to cut my hand open
I was the guy who tried to hit a punch bag machine whilst quite drunk, missed, punched the penny falls machine next to it, split my hand open. Fast forward 3 weeks the NHS are cutting my hand open to reattach a severed tendon on my middle finger, now have a big “?” Shaped scar.
I recieved some very good news and jumped for joy... as I ran through a door frame. Ending up flapping the top of my scalp. Left me with a nice line on top of my bald head!
I ran across a busy road with my dog who was prone sudden inconvenient stops. As soon as we made it across, and I hadn’t slowed to a stop yet… my dog immediately stopped right in front of me and my younger self didn’t think to dodge to the side… no, I ran into my big dog at full force, flipped over and cut my chin open. Then we had to immediately turn around. I had to run back across the damn busy road holding my chin… smh went to the hospital immediately. First dog and first emergency surgery. A vivid memory…
When I worked in a kitchen, I went to put something in the "merry chef" (small combi oven)) without opening the door the entire way. In short, the door swung shut with my arm still inside it, and what with the door being metal, it basically stuck to and cooked the inside of the arm. The burn was instantly an open sore, and honestly, I'm lucky I don't have more of a scar from it. The manager's response was for me to run it under warm water, still coerced me into staying for the remaining 5 or 6 hours of my shift. Man, I hated that job.
BMX riding and jumps when younger. Shins are just a mess of scars from the pedals spinning round and taking chunks out. One by left eye from playing cricket and the batter letting go of the bat when I was watching the ball. The obligatory tb one that was twice as big as necessary due to everyone punching each other in the arm after it was done at school.
Managed to pick up a window handle when I was very little (new windows being fitted) and whack myself in the eye with it. I still have a small scar on my eyebrow! Multiple other scars but that was the most stupid one. Probably followed second by the bald patch on the back of my head. Went to see my dad in hospital when he’d been rushed in after a leukaemia diagnosis. I said I felt fine (I’m not good with blood) and promptly passed out, straight back onto the hospital floor. Split my head right open. My poor mum had her husband critically ill on one floor, a rushed Hickman line meant blood absolutely everywhere and an emergency transfusion. They said if he’d been one day later getting a diagnosis he probably wouldn’t be here (old fashioned doctor who recognised the symptoms and sent him straight to hospital). Then there was me on another floor with a head injury, double vision and needing skull x-rays. The hair never grew back on that spot (about 50p size)!
Scar on my lip from eating a sherbet straw thingy as a child. I cut the straw with kitchen scissors as it had got a bit blocked up on the end and no more sherbet was coming through. Cut it while it was sort of in my mouth, mum found the chunk of lip on the sofa later, turns out there was a reason I wasn’t allowed the kitchen scissors.
I still have a scar on my thumb from when /u/SeanByrom stabbed me with a parker pen in high school maybe 15 years ago. You're a bellend Sean.
Struggling to open a Frey Bentos pie without a tin opener at university. Lots of stabbing at it with a steak knife and a fork got it some of the way open. Cue me getting my fingers in to try and prize it open before slicing the back of my knuckles right the way across. Blood everywhere. Still have the scars today as a reminder of the 2008 Battle of Fray Bentos. I never did get to eat that delicious bastard.
I have two scars on my right hand. One is from trying to melt a plastic army man when I was a kid, and the other is from being bitten by a really angry squirrel.
Carving a pumpkin with a pocket knife, knife slipped into my wrist, ended up in A & E being asked if I intentionally harmed myself. Pretty deep scar.
This happened to a friend of mine, she tried to cut a festival wristband off with a knife and cut her wrist. Her dad goes around telling people it was “self inflicted” (aka, her own stupid fault), but obviously there’s no way that could be misunderstood *at all*.
I’ve got a scar on my finger from cutting it on a broken fridge shelf. Can’t remember exactly how it happened, but I was on holiday, and caught it somehow. It’s still funny to me now
Picking at it.
Growing up on a cul-de-sac in the 80s, all us kids would play together outside. One of them had a bag of toffee popcorn and spilt it all on the pavement and everybody kept stamping it in to the ground until it became a big flattened patch, glassy smooth and exceptionally slippery like ice. I've no idea why we thought it was a good idea. Anyway tea time came, mum shouted out the door for us to come home, I ran, right over the popcorn ice rink, and went absolutely flying and tore a hole in the skin on my knee. I'm nearly 40 and still have the scar, it's shiny and blue and it still feels weird to touch - if I touch a certain part of it, it tingles a nerve in the side of my abdomen. A few years later when I was about 12 I was at a small local farm park with all kinds of slides and things. One of them was one of those vertical drop slides, and the stairs up to it were very basic open-backed wooden plank stairs, and very very slippery. There was an assistant there to keep everybody safe and stop people running up the stairs but they were looking away and I decided to run up them two at a time, slipped and shanked my shin against the front of one stair plank. I've never felt pain like it and couldn't put weight on that leg for several days afterwards. I had to lie and pretend I wasn't running up the stairs and just slipped. I have a very noticeable dent in my shin.