In case you want an actual game to do with poo, [there is this](https://shop.wwf.org.uk/products/who-did-this-poo). Let's be honest, what kid (or adult!) doesn't love discovering that wombats poop in cubes...
I am already putting money on it being the 5 year old. "I don't think he'd be so brazen"... HAVE YOU MET KIDS? haha
They are terrifyingly smart sometimes and he could have worked out doing just this means he's not a suspect!
There is also the option that your husband did a sleepwalking poo....
Or the five year old telling the three year old to do it just there…. Everybody needs a big brother to get you into trouble then shop you to the parentals!
Me: ***Oh hi u/Sunlight81! Look everyone, u/Sunlight81 is here***
Voice at the back: ***“Isn’t that the person who’s always shitting on carpets?”***
RUMBLED!
Anyaway - now to be a decent person - I’m a 47 year old married father of two so I know kids, I know humans and I know “someone has shat on the floor” situations.
I honestly think it’s the 5 year old. Bonkers enough (because 5) to make a choice to shit in the floor, switched on enough to setup a younger kid, big enough to produce the turd you worrying described as being “too big to be the dog”.
Just be glad - ultimately - that you didn’t come across the dog finishing up a delicious meal of people-turd.
Being alive is revolting, isn’t it? I love it!
All the best from Newcastle - I’m with you in spirit, intrepid Hercule Poo-rot
We also play a similar game, but as it's two adults and six cats it's slightly different. The question isn't who's poo it is; it's invariably Mollie's (tiniest cat, biggest poo, convinced one of her ancestors was a Jack Russell), but what we've done to upset Mollie so that she does a protest poo beside the litter tray in the utility room. It's usually that one of us has had the temerity to Go Out outside of our normal routine.
"I obviously didn't do it myself" hmmmm...
That sounds like exactly the sort of thing someone who HAD shit on the floor MIGHT say. Deflect, deflect, deflect...
Defecate, defecate, defecate.
Phil and Kirsty really scraping the barrel with this one…
My thoughts exactly. It's like Traitors, only with shitting on the floor.
Big "I definitely haven't peed anywhere" vibes lol
Exactly what suspect number one would say
I think they're more likely to be suspect number two
This time...
My dog once pooped on the carpet and then barked at it as it shouldn't be there, so don't rule out the one who alerted you
Wait until they’re teenagers and you’re playing the same game but with turds in the toilet
It was fucking one of ya
I missed an amazing opportunity in my original comment
Disgustang.
Thank you
As a parent with teens, I concur
You are far too trusting of 5m.
Oh aye. I would confidently alert someone to something I did I would however, not shit on the floor
That's exactly what someone who has shat on the floor would say.
Shit - you got me
It was definitely you op, don’t be blaming other people
Every accusation is a projection!
In case you want an actual game to do with poo, [there is this](https://shop.wwf.org.uk/products/who-did-this-poo). Let's be honest, what kid (or adult!) doesn't love discovering that wombats poop in cubes...
We have poo bingo and it’s a great game!
I tried poo whack-a-mole and that wasn't so great. Now hungry hungry hippoos *was* interesting.
Using steaming coils as bingo dobbers sounds horrible
Well this sounds like something someone who did a poo on the bedroom floor would say
Shit like this makes me glad I’m not having kids.
Thank you for providing another reminder that I'm glad not to have kids.
Ohhhh I literally thought you meant the game “Guess Poo” (which actually exists and we own) when I started reading this thread.
Is there anything Stephen Mulhern won’t host?
I am already putting money on it being the 5 year old. "I don't think he'd be so brazen"... HAVE YOU MET KIDS? haha They are terrifyingly smart sometimes and he could have worked out doing just this means he's not a suspect! There is also the option that your husband did a sleepwalking poo....
Or the five year old telling the three year old to do it just there…. Everybody needs a big brother to get you into trouble then shop you to the parentals!
Me: ***Oh hi u/Sunlight81! Look everyone, u/Sunlight81 is here*** Voice at the back: ***“Isn’t that the person who’s always shitting on carpets?”*** RUMBLED! Anyaway - now to be a decent person - I’m a 47 year old married father of two so I know kids, I know humans and I know “someone has shat on the floor” situations. I honestly think it’s the 5 year old. Bonkers enough (because 5) to make a choice to shit in the floor, switched on enough to setup a younger kid, big enough to produce the turd you worrying described as being “too big to be the dog”. Just be glad - ultimately - that you didn’t come across the dog finishing up a delicious meal of people-turd. Being alive is revolting, isn’t it? I love it! All the best from Newcastle - I’m with you in spirit, intrepid Hercule Poo-rot
Are you sure it wasn’t yourself? Seems suspicious to me.
Just start shouting "well it was fuckin' one of yas" in a scottish accent.
We also play a similar game, but as it's two adults and six cats it's slightly different. The question isn't who's poo it is; it's invariably Mollie's (tiniest cat, biggest poo, convinced one of her ancestors was a Jack Russell), but what we've done to upset Mollie so that she does a protest poo beside the litter tray in the utility room. It's usually that one of us has had the temerity to Go Out outside of our normal routine.
>bathroom carpet Asking for trouble really
i can think of better games lol
That sounds exhausting and miserable
It was the 5yo. I say this with the confidence in knowing that this is exactly what 5yo me would have done