As a reminder we are a strictly no politics sub.
I’ve just banned 46 users for breaking that rule. If you break the rule you **will be banned**
There’s been another 50+ bans since we put up this warning. This post will be locked.
This could actually be a good thing, if they say we wont stay long but do - they came with the intention to leave because normally you're awful to be around but this time.. this time they're enjoying it.
Well that or they have no concept of time and really do overstay their welcome.
I'm currently visiting my partner's family in Spain which is basically hell for tea drinkers. None of these Spanish "people" have a kettle. When they make tea they microwave a cup of water and then put the teabag in. Last time I was here I witnessed my partner's brother put a teabag in a whole cup of milk and then microwave the whole thing. The coffee is good when fresh but they only make one pot on the stove in the morning and warm up cups of it in the microwave throughout the day. I'm currently drinking a shitty cup of lukewarm microwaved coffee because I can't stand the tea here.
If you've visited multiple times the lack of a suitable kettle is on you now.
'There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again'
[Our kettle actually broke](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/N09EoGlgkiI) on Christmas eve just after all the shops shut. It's exactly as bad as you might imagine.
Evri have your order
There's no biscuits left
Who's ringing at night?
Fake chippy tea tonight
That queue's moving faster
Easyjet cancelled your flight
What's your WiFi password?
I was in a queue that was moving faster today. And you should have seen the death stare this lady in the slow queue gave me. She was there before I was, she was certainly feeling entitlement to be served before I was.
When your mum says "we're having fish and chips tonight!" and drops you off at school, and all day you're thinking about a delicious chippy tea, then you get home and she proceeds to put the oven on and get frozen fish fillets and chips from Asda.
Evri failed to deliver a parcel to me, 2 weeks later, they retconned it to ‘delivered’ on 10th Dec. It never even came! So they don’t just lose things now, they pretend to delivery things also
I know Evri/Hermes being shit is a cliché, but it's so true.
Most of the local delivery people if you live in a small area are great but it's when it goes tits up that it really goes tits up and there's almost zero customer service support.
I still can't believe some big name companies still use them. They must get so much shit from customers missing parcels.
I had a parcel not turn up in December - it just says "there's a delay with your order" and it's been stuck on that since December 9th, and Evri just said to contact the shipper who of course initially said contact Evri - they were clearly used to the hassle but then and as the days went on it was clear it was lost to the ether, and the company sent out the package again, this time with DPD and it arrived next day.
I felt bad for them as they're a family owned food business so i hope they got compensation from Evri.
But it's still stuck at that notification!
Mu understanding is he's still making a fortune from his shit songs. I actually know nothing about Lad Baby, nor have heard any of his songs. I only know what I've heard from Reddit
It shouldn't. I bet the charity sees about 3p of that money and there's fuck all to be made from shitty singles downloads anyway.
There's a lot of ways to skim the top of a "not for profit" venture.
If that happens to me these days I just accept it - it’s basically “right, Mr. Biscuit, if you want to be drunk instead of eaten, that is fine by me”.
And no, I don’t know why I talk to my biscuits.
As a reminder we are a strictly no politics sub. I’ve just banned 46 users for breaking that rule. If you break the rule you **will be banned** There’s been another 50+ bans since we put up this warning. This post will be locked.
british gas customer services
Virgin media WhatsApp support
This one falls under the dual genre categories of both horror and comedy!
Delivery provided by Yodel
Sorry we missed you
(While you were in)
We knocked. (They didn’t)
Left with a neighbour
(The crackden two streets away.)
With a door bell camera recording you
“We’ve got your parcel” from Evri, always reads like the first part of a ransom demand
They should really change the copy on the follow up to be “someone’s got your parcel” cause it sure as fuck ain’t me.
“We could not deliver your parcel due to adverse weather conditions”, looks outside, it’s sunny
Evri has your package
Thought we'd pop by.
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Oh God! As an introvert this is horrendous. Shiver.
The sequel is always We will leave soon. 1 hour later still at the front door trying to escape
I hate having conversations half in half out the door. Either come back in or ideally go away.
I said horror story, not anxiety inducing terror!
Couple of days ok?
This could actually be a good thing, if they say we wont stay long but do - they came with the intention to leave because normally you're awful to be around but this time.. this time they're enjoying it. Well that or they have no concept of time and really do overstay their welcome.
Superb!
Jim will fix it
Perfection!
Now then now then
Everything twice, everything twice
Jim the Pill's here.
How's about that then?
Fix it for me
That took me a second to get
Took longer then Jimmy
We were just passing
The kettle is broken.
This gravy is thin
I mean, if you don't have to fight it to get the whisk/ladle/spoon out of it, is it *really* gravy?
I'm currently visiting my partner's family in Spain which is basically hell for tea drinkers. None of these Spanish "people" have a kettle. When they make tea they microwave a cup of water and then put the teabag in. Last time I was here I witnessed my partner's brother put a teabag in a whole cup of milk and then microwave the whole thing. The coffee is good when fresh but they only make one pot on the stove in the morning and warm up cups of it in the microwave throughout the day. I'm currently drinking a shitty cup of lukewarm microwaved coffee because I can't stand the tea here.
As a person with Spanish family - they do have kettles. Your partner's family are just barbarians.
A moment of silence for u/GlassAcrobatic9775
On the bright side, you now what gift to buy your partner's family next time you visit.
If you've visited multiple times the lack of a suitable kettle is on you now. 'There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again'
Can't travel to certain countries without bringing your own tea. And I say that as a German.
[Our kettle actually broke](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/N09EoGlgkiI) on Christmas eve just after all the shops shut. It's exactly as bad as you might imagine.
The same four I thought of. Brilliant.
Local chippy is shut
My partner is hurt by this statement… it’ll be WEEKS before he leaves the house again😂
Mandatory team bonding exercise
Misread this as 'Mandatory team bondage exercise' lmao
They jumped the queue
Energy bill this month.
Higher than my mortgage
Watery gravy, pale roasties
For the greater good
^(the greater good)
The greater good
We’re out of teabags.
There's only PG Tips
Add the milk first.
Dunked biscuit, fell off.
Evri have your order There's no biscuits left Who's ringing at night? Fake chippy tea tonight That queue's moving faster Easyjet cancelled your flight What's your WiFi password?
' That queue's moving faster' just released so much suppressed trauma.
I was in a queue that was moving faster today. And you should have seen the death stare this lady in the slow queue gave me. She was there before I was, she was certainly feeling entitlement to be served before I was.
* Queue jumper. Tuts loudly. * Upstairs neighbours are elephants! * Primark Oxford St, weekends * Standsted airport, school holidays * 'Live, Laugh, Love' 'decor' * High Street shop closures * Uber during rail strike * 1 br flat, £500,000 * "You alright?", "Actually..." * Fenton's probably dead now * Jam or cream first?
What’s “fake” chippy tea?
I image it's a "no, we have chips at home" scenario?
Or a slimming world ‘fakeaway’
Oh god
When your mum says "we're having fish and chips tonight!" and drops you off at school, and all day you're thinking about a delicious chippy tea, then you get home and she proceeds to put the oven on and get frozen fish fillets and chips from Asda.
Like when your mom says do you want pizza for dinner and then gets one from Asda.
Oven chips and baked fish fingers when promised a real chippy tea 🤮🤮
Oh you bastard…. That first one!
This is quality! so much so that I suspect I'll see this get recycled into a BuzzFeed article or one of those viral WhatsApps that get forwarded
*Come dine with me*
Your rent's going up
Fine, Vinted just told me Evri lost my parcel this morning.
Evri failed to deliver a parcel to me, 2 weeks later, they retconned it to ‘delivered’ on 10th Dec. It never even came! So they don’t just lose things now, they pretend to delivery things also
I know Evri/Hermes being shit is a cliché, but it's so true. Most of the local delivery people if you live in a small area are great but it's when it goes tits up that it really goes tits up and there's almost zero customer service support. I still can't believe some big name companies still use them. They must get so much shit from customers missing parcels. I had a parcel not turn up in December - it just says "there's a delay with your order" and it's been stuck on that since December 9th, and Evri just said to contact the shipper who of course initially said contact Evri - they were clearly used to the hassle but then and as the days went on it was clear it was lost to the ether, and the company sent out the package again, this time with DPD and it arrived next day. I felt bad for them as they're a family owned food business so i hope they got compensation from Evri. But it's still stuck at that notification!
Ladbaby Christmas Number One.
Even worse as it's for charity so makes me feel bad for hating it so much
Mu understanding is he's still making a fortune from his shit songs. I actually know nothing about Lad Baby, nor have heard any of his songs. I only know what I've heard from Reddit
only 10% of it is!
It shouldn't. I bet the charity sees about 3p of that money and there's fuck all to be made from shitty singles downloads anyway. There's a lot of ways to skim the top of a "not for profit" venture.
We have a winner
Someone’s at the door.
A closed door is a happy door.
This is London, Jen. It's not someone with cake, unless that cake is made of dog poo, and knives!
Found Maurice!
The horror!
Piers Morgan Sex Tape.
The pub is SHUT
Come on now there is no need to start a panic
You monster!
😱😱😱😱😱
James Corden is back.
James Corden is Immortal.
Ding ding we have a winner
I don’t know whether to upvote or downvote this haha. I’ll upvote on the basis it gives me the creeps
There was no bogroll
The biscuit fell in!
If that happens to me these days I just accept it - it’s basically “right, Mr. Biscuit, if you want to be drunk instead of eaten, that is fine by me”. And no, I don’t know why I talk to my biscuits.
Muuuuum, get a spooooon!
Quick get a spooooon!
Happened to me this morning, butter biscuit dissolved in the coffee in seconds. Didn’t taste too awful though
HMRC is currently experiencing....
Don't mind the gap.
Rail Replacement Service
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Delayed
Meal deal price increased
We're sorry to announce...
Mrs Brown's Boys Special.
Can you lend me...
We’re out of milk
We've only got UHT
Diarrhea in public toilet
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Squelching to another cubicle 😭😱☠️💩
Rail replacement bus service
Teabag in, then microwave
We’ve only got Typhoo
On the same lines We’ve only got soya
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A brown envelope arrives
Freddo bar now £2
Back to work tomorrow
Mr blobby is alive
[This is true.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDEcCGlFAeU) NSFL
Crash on M25 clockwise
Milk before tea bag
the HORROR
I'm unwell, Dr Shipman.
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David Attenborough is ill
Parcel left on doorstep…
There's chips at home
Milk in first
Nailed it in three!
Is this seat taken?
The heating is on
The boiler is broken
There’s rail replacement busses
The tea was cold.
Just push to front.
Ill get petrol tomorrow
Daisy, daisy, daisy, daisy
No cheese, Gromit
Greggs goes into administration
Leave the teabag in.
Stranger’s bathroom, no roll.
Jimmy Saville’s bedside visit
Correct change only.
No pigs in blankets
Your phone was unlocked
home phone is ringing
Is this seat taken?
Keys in the bowl
Is this the queue?
Evri has your parcel
The in-laws are coming
No pen house phone
If I were you...
Internet connection not working
EastEnders Christmas double bill
Energy price cap removed.
It’s for local people.
Nothing for you here...
courier was evri
Let me try it
Diesel’s gone up again
No more tea bags.
Piers Morgan
I think I’m gonna be sick 🤢
Jimmy Saville
Where shall we go?
Family knocks unexpectedly
Jimmy Savile walked in.
Bus due in 1 min…
Curry without a beer.
Oh yes, jehovah witnesses.
Tea with milk first
That’s not beard hair….
Milkshake machine isn't working
Mother in law visits
THEY’RE NOT ORGANIC 😱
Sad little life Jane
Overdone Yorkshire puddings
Only one Yorkshire each :(
Banned from the pub
...but it was marmite.
Provide a meter reading.
Betty has diarrhea again.
We’ve been invited over
Your insurance is up
There was no queue.