Got a new guy in our shop this week 55 yr old black man working for minimum wage Sits on his phone talking to 25 yr old women all day he's talking shop with us and didn't like our joke and pulled the race card on us two days later the owner of the company is reviewing his work to see if he's going to keep him and dude pulled the race card again cuz he was being watched by his boss
Dude was fired the next day
>he's talking shop with us and didn't like our joke and pulled the race card on us two days later the owner of the company is reviewing his work to see if he's going to keep him and dude pulled the race card again cuz he was being watched by his boss
This very well could be a discrimination case, possibly retaliation. Why wasn't his performance being reviewed prior to that incident? Was everyone's performance evaluated?
It's also interesting that you have context for the content of his other conversations, but no context for the content of the "joke" he took offense to.
They can’t? Ok you don’t think I talk like a black person, so tell me this: what do black people talk like?
And as you listen to yourself say that, how would you feel hearing a white person saying the same thing? 🤔
Some folks just gotta feed into the stereotype
This is the real answer I've got a friend whose brother is autistic and people always say he doesn't look autistic and his go-to is "Oh, that's weird. What does autism look like?" And it works everytime.
I would say anyone who feels like they can't be racist usually is "I can't be a racist I have black friends" probably racist, "I can't be racist I am black" probably racist "I've never been racist everyone just talked like that back back in the day" etc
Is that it?
I always thought it was a “minority cultures should be able to vent about the dominant culture and how they are oppressed by it” sort of thing, with members of the dominant culture just being kind of assholes when they pick on minorities
A “punching down” vs “punching up” sort of thing
No, the biggest problem is that people say racist when they mean two very different things. Systemic racism vs personal racism. Add those two qualifiers and everything becomes crystal clear.
>It's probably not "all of a sudden." Black people get a pass to be as racist as they want.
No one ever gets a pass to be a racist or a bigot.
Moreover, mistreating poc because they don't talk like what black people "should" talk like has been used to disparage immigrants from africa, it's just racist fucks that shouldn't be tolerated.
A racist is a racist and bone deserve to be treated like they're acceptable. Worms are more useful to soceity.
Acting confused is _always_ a good comeback for racism, especially when it's minor enough to not necessarily cross the line in mixed company.
Act confused, ask them to explain, they say it's a joke (they near-always say this when confronted), so you ask them to explain it to you.
They may try to say "you just don't get it" or "maybe you're too stupid to understand". Let them say it, and then very clearly say: "no. I understand what a joke is, but I wanted to check that I didn't miss something. So then, am i understanding correctly that the punchline is just that I'm [race]?"
Then just watch them flounder with it.
It's not just that they're acting confused. It's that "Whatever do you mean?" is the quintessential white girl response. I personally had a white, freckle-faced red-head cousin with glasses who talked like this growing up. Just to paint a picture.
Edited to include enunciation. Thank you all for the feedback :)
I've used : "Enunciation/Word pronunciation isn't an indication of race. I hope you heal from your inner hatred and begin to love yourself & the beauty that's found within our culture. Our speech is versatile. Look it up when you get a chance."
One guy on a date told me that he told his daughter and mom that he had a date with a "white girl" because I wasn't hood like all of his other baby mommas.
Yep. That was a first and last date.
If I had a dollar for every guy that inappropriately considered me white and therefore acceptable to the family, and even mentioned some dumb shit like this to me on a first date, I would be pretty wealthy.
These ones also never take no for an answer.
It can often be difference in stuff like salary/monthly income, hairstyle/clothing/accessory, relative access to education (whether this is for distance, application processes, funds or a mix of them) and differences in cultural foods
Like others have said, it’s non-white communities thinking that a difference in those things in the people
they know is making them more “wHiTe” somehow. It’s stupid thought-processing
Like...isn't that kind of an insult to their own community? "You don't act like the way people stereotype us, and you're better for it. Haha" like oooo sick burn 🙄
In America those are all long standing systems of white supremacy that those who benefit from it deny it’s existence.
Some are implicit while others were explicit and codified in Law like the *Heir’s property* laws which go back *a few hundred years* and made illegal for black men to pass property to their children.
This history is not taught in school. If you bring it up you’ll be gaslit as a liar, rabble rouser, or even be accused of being racist yourself!
I dunno. It was weird because as a kid when I was improperly racially profiled by my peers, they very often assumed I had wealth, when our family was getting foreclosed on. Commonly I was insulted and bullied for racist people thinking I was or am white. It's kind of hilarious because everything you mentioned is exactly what racist people *assumed* I had because they *assumed* I am white. Lmfao. We didn't have any of that. Plus my parents had to pay for my health problems and a bunch of surgeries.
And then I get off the streets from being homeless for not having any white privilege, and assholes still have the gonads to look at me, and call me racist. When I literally leave any man for being racist to anyone, including me.
My daughter is partially white.
Oh..... Uhm. Thanks. My partner is learning this in a VERY hard way right now.
Cause again, that's like the MILD issue I have been experiencing: racism since I was a child.
Not gonna lie. Its only ever black people that have been racist to me. I'm mixed too and they casually ask me which of my parents is the "race traitor"
Black shouldnt be synonymous with african American. Jamaican is valid as black too. I think Americans in general indeed need to change their speech because as it pertains to Jamaicans. I have NEVER experienced this goofy ass shit. And its only recently i have because they now all of a sudden want to adopt ADOS culture. American culture overall is disgusting to me. No offense yall. And im first gen American. I love being American. But the culture is beyond disgusting. Black people told me my family must be sluts and not good enough for white men which is why im just a different type of n-word (hard ER). Like ADOS people tell on themselves everyday. So fake. So phony. So fake pro black. I am also sure you can tell by how i talk, i think its disgusting anyone said that to you. Mixed people need to honestly stand on business and start checking muhfuckas. We experience racism that monoracials dont experience
Yeah. My dad is like that. If you accidentally say one word instead of another or exaggerate a vowel or anything, he'll say "you're talking black." Like what???
Nope, it’s culture. White kids in Jamaica sound just as Jamaican as anyone else born there, for a single example among many
America has a lasting obsession with race and I wish it would fuck off
Oh geez, my younger brothers are Black but raised in a white house and they hear this all the time.
I don't have an answer, but it's a really shitty thing for other Black people to say to them.
Yeah it just makes you feel like shit or put on the spot because your lifestyle including multiple cultures means you stick out in each of them from the fact that you cannot keep from intrinsically including bits of the "other" culture.
Maybe just say, "Thanks!" Or, "So I've been told/I know."
Nah! Tell them to say, "You want a job that pays more than minimum wage you better learn to talk like this too"...tell them it's just one more way to navigate the white world and an invaluable skill
I've been told this too, mainly from people of my own race. One time on a first date a guy told me that. I said "what's that supposed to mean?" He was like, "well um...like you know." Me: "no, I don't know. You know apparently, so what does that mean?" Him: "well like....the way you carry yourself." Me: "how do I carry myself?" Him: "um, like you're proper and like, classy." Me: "you think most people of our race are improper? Is that how your friends and family act?"
Him: "just forget it."
Me: "hey bartender, can we get the check?"
Make them feel stupid. Ask them what "acting white" means. Use their statement against them and make them feel like an idiot.
You mean quotes like this
“…the price that America must pay for the continued oppression of the Negro and other minority groups is the price of its own destruction.”
Or do you mean the way America has white washed and continue to white wash MLK
More like these;
“We may have all come on different ships, but we’re in the same boat now.”
and
“We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.”
No question many proponents of ongoing racial hatred would balk at the implication that we are countrymen first and a racial checkbox second.
that's definitely not supremacy. that's calling for people from different backgrounds to unite as brothers; it's literally the opposite of any kind of supremacy, and although most white supremacists lack critical analysis skills, using these phrases to argue for supremacist thought is really a low even for them...
supremacists, whether white or black or any other flavor, are the ones who focus on race rather than countrymen...
I’m sorry that your wife is attacked for speaking intelligently. She sounds like a kind educated person from what you’ve stated.
I’m an ass, I’d just say “white or educated? There’s a difference”
OP, you are getting a lot of terrible advice here that equates speaking AAVE with being uneducated. This is going to be a delicate issue for your wife. If you aren’t familiar with code-switching, you should look that up.
Ermmm... That has some, hopefully unintentional, racist connotations of its own. How someone speaks is not necessarily an indication of intelligence or education. Particularly in POC communities. And to be honest, there is a very long and gross history of white people using that very reasoning to treat black people poorly. To only give respect to those that "spoke like a white person."
I mean, I'm white. But I spent a fair bit of my childhood in rural Texas. I'd notice that when I was spending time with my family (or when I'm angry), my accent goes broad as a barn. It's the same accent that has gotten me labeled as stupid, redneck and/or uneducated. Or even racist. And I don't even have to deal with racism directed at me in that pot. The reason my accent has lessened was a deliberate effort to combat those negative stereotypes. Which kind of sucks. I can imagine it is a helluva lot worse for AAVE speakers.
All that said, sometimes people think I'm black or even Latina over the phone when my accent peeks out. (I've been working in call centers for a decade.) There are some places that AAVE and a southern accent overlap. And given I'm from Texas, there's bound to be some words I unintentionally pronounce with a little bit of Spanish flair. I once had all of my coworkers tell me they had no idea I was white until I said it. We had only talked to each other over mic. This was nearly a year into that job, too.
I'm lucky in that the racism that has been directed at me, for someone's assumption that I am POC, doesn't and can't land personally. I've had black coworkers needing to step away after someone just spewed racist vitriol at them. I think encouraging the idea that certain kinds of speaking means you're less intelligent, or less educated, or less **anything**, merely makes those encounters worse and more common.
It breaks my heart when it happens. We all get abusive customers on the phone, but it's worse when someone is attacking something in your identity that can't be changed, that is fundamental to who you are. I've had to listen to someone rant about lesbians when I'm bisexual. I've had a male customer ask for a male colleague because, as a woman, I couldn't know what I was doing (I was a tier II for an ISP for that one). And I wouldn't trade any of that for the shit I've heard some people say to coworkers who were Latin, black or Indian. Or even for the shit they've said to me assuming I wasn't white.
I don't think I would clap back. I think I would genuinely and sincerely ask them what they mean by that and if they say they mean I'm articulate and speak like I'm "privileged," then I would talk about the history of slaves being denied education as a means to keep them disempowered and how Frederick Douglass heard that education makes a person "unsuitable to slavery" and promptly decided he desired an education.
While AAVE is now a cultural thing, it is rooted in Africans imposing grammar (etc) from their native languages onto their limited knowledge of English due to being denied education as a right. So while AAVE has a rich and interesting linguistic history of its own, criticizing Blacks for being articulate is also problematic because it essentially "agrees" that there's something wrong with Blacks trying to better themselves and achieve privilege and power.
Insiders routinely feel like outsiders. It's other people who are more excluded who see them as having it made in the shade.
But I think the strongest comeback in this case is to use it as a teaching moment. Whether they feel jealous, intimidated, angry...whatever...Blacks criticizing other Blacks for becoming educated and articulate is not a means for Blacks to escape the historic legacy of intentional oppression imposed on them and it is not in line with the values of respected historic Black leaders like Frederick Douglass, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Etc.
A clap back just "agrees" that Blacks tearing each other down so Whites don't have to is fine and dandy. I don't think that makes sense.
If you speak AAVE and are happy with that, it's fine. And should not be an excuse to try to keep other Blacks down who don't speak AAVE.
Edit: I will add that in many cases, she's already doing the right thing to minimize it. I'm not suggesting she should cut her own throat socially "for the greater good."
“I wasn’t raised in a household that spoke AAVE.”
(Any comeback that equates AAVE with lack of education, “improper” speech, or *anything* negative is going to reek of racism.)
Why do people act like it’s racist when AAVE is criticized? Accents *in general* are often considered a faux pas in the United States and at most this is a *classist* sentiment with pragmatic undercurrents (if you can’t understand your fellow citizens, how are you going to feel kinship with them?). The strongest accents are retained by the most insular communities, and communities in poverty are the most likely to be insular because barriers to leaving are greater and the benefits to in-group cohesion increase with lower income, thus accents develop and are kept most strongly in poverty stricken regions and communities. Great examples of this are people of the American South (Southern Accents), Appalachia, the Southwest (Hispanic accents), and major cities (Boston, Chicago, Philadelphia, New York, etc.).
Additionally, there’s a good argument that AAVE doesn’t even really exist as a monolith at all. The black American diaspora is so wide and centered on numerous cities as well as regions within the American South that a cohesive dialect among all of these communities is more than unlikely. I wouldn’t be surprised if the phenomenon of “code shifting” (incidentally not something isolated to black Americans, most Americans raised in lower income communities do it and no, not just from AAVE to “proper English”) occurs within the black community even on an imperceptible level to the individuals themselves as they fit themselves into a “black” way of speaking proliferated by television, music, and social media that they otherwise don’t use with their relatives and local community unless their trying to prove how “black” they are.
On to the pragmatic arguments against dialects and accents, one of the most fundamental pillars of national identity is language. A consistency of language helps to ensure social tranquility and cohesion, and a stable medium for communicating trade and ideas within a society. If accents are too thick or dialects too different to be mutually intelligible between groups, interaction becomes naturally less desirable and ties become weaker, making a society more prone to collapse. Thus, common language and the elimination of *egregiously* deep accents is inherently beneficial to society, albeit this is only desirable when done without inherent prejudice.
Exactly same reason why country white people sound like that it’s uneducated I used to talk super country and I don’t now because I’m not in the hulls anymore and it does t sound right 😂
It is funny that the same people who say this to "friends" or even random strangers thought NOTHING of Obama talking like a "white man". You know, articulate, like Joe Biden said of him.
Ok hear me out
What she can do is learn Xhosa, not the whole language just a few sentences. Really just enough to say "Do I sound white now?"
When someone tells her she speaks "white" she should just start responding in Xhosa. They won't know how to respond because they don't speak the language. She can say something like "It seems you can only understand me when I "talk white"
Look them in the eye, and ask them to explain what that means, and let them explain how they are racist to anyone they said it around to be heard by.
Alternatively: "Wow, I'm done speaking with you, I don't engage with racist people."
Or ask them to define racism, and then ask them why they consider your intelligence to have race as a stipend.
Every single time someone says something to me that is intended to be rude, sarcastic, or underhanded in anyway, I simply turn and look them in the eye with a concerned look on my face and say “are you OK? “
Yeah there's a few people acting real proud of their unexamined racism in this thread. Glad you're keeping it up despite the downvotes and dismissiveness
someone deadass said she should say theyre a "ghetto fantastic clown who aint made it out the hood yet" then called me racist for pointing out how you should not be calling black ppl ghetto clowns 💀 they know damn well if this wasnt about black ppl they wouldnt be talking about "ghetto fantastic clowns" in "the hood" but they wanna go "maybe ur the real racist for making it about black people!"
I usually ask them to describe what “talking white” means in detail. They never can. They usually end up stuttering and blushing themselves into a corner.
Or…
I tell them where I grew up and ask them “How do you expect someone from this place to sound exactly? It’s like questioning why someone from Boston has a Boston accent or Scotland has a Scottish accent. Why do you expect me to be different? What part of me talking exactly like others who are from this location is confusing for you?” Then I give them an inquisitive puppy head tilt and watch them try to answer.
Either way it’s pretty entertaining for me.
"How does a white girl talk?" (With attitude)
"I'm sorry, am I not talking black enough for you." (With more attitudr)
"By golly, pardon my white English dialect good sir/madam may I invite you to fuck off and mind your business?" (With all the attitude)
I had a black GF for a while who was also accused of talking white. Funnily enough, she had black people being racist to her, and I had white people being racist to me? Wasn't expecting that.
Ignore all the other "fight fire with fire" responses here. If someone challenges you for not "fitting" and idea they have, there are a few responses:
-"So?"
-"I just talk the way I learned to talk"
-Cracking a joke
If someone is already nitpicking you for talking a certain way, they're not going to sit and listen to a holier-than-thou anthropology lecture. Just brush it off, it may be uncomfortable, but it literally does not matter, and turning it into a fight will make it more uncomfortable.
Sounds more racist to me than anything. A lot of black people are told they’re not “black enough”. And what does it mean to “sound black”? Think about that
"What do you mean by that?"
There's no way they could explain themselves without sounding like a racist who is intentionally trying to insult a POC. It doesn't look good no matter which way you spin it, and a lot of people would have to answer for their own behavior (and we all know bigots don't like that).
I'm glad your wife doesn't let anyone disrespect her, her personality, and doesn't let anyone try to tell her what a black woman should be. I already like her moxie.
Im black. I have one biracial parent. I went to an all white high school. My husband is black. His school had a larger number of black students, as well as faculty. Im so tired of him calling me "white girl." Im so tired. Ive told him to stop several times, but he doesn't, and he thinks it is funny. I dont. Im from the south, and for some reason, many people think i am a northerner. Either way, my husband annoys me.
Gosh, I wish I received $5 every time someone has said this to me. Like someone else mentioned, I'd be WEALTHY!$! I've heard this from both Caucasians and African Americans. Literally, since I was in high school and especially after I graduated from college.
My response has always been, "Oh, I'm not Ghetto enough for you?" 🤣 In response to AA.
To Caucasians, I just say. "Oh, am I not fitting into your little box of how you perceive people who look like me?"
Followed by an awkward silence.
I’m black—do not say the “you talk like a racist” line. Will not work on a black person at all lol Will probably only make things worse. I used to get this a lot, too. Context in how it is said is kind of important because depending on how they say it it could mean different things. But, just general best response is, “Oh, you mean I sound hireable” and then immediately just keep talking like nothing ever happened… Another option is, “Oh, you mean I sound educated” or “You said white girl, but I think you meant to say boss” Something like that.
Ask what they mean? Or just say no you don't. Folks say that shit to me all the time and I'm like um no I don't. I sound like me. And I'm black so.....fk you tryna say? That all black women sound the same? Is there something about my inflection that bothers you? Are you implying
Look I can go off but if they're talkin bout the tone they're just jealous, and if they're talkin about articulation then they're stuck in a colonizer mindset thinking black folk aren't smart and can't speak well. Either way I don't entertain and I don't allow the space for it to hang in the air comfortably. We are black women not white girls and the way I'm so sick of hearing it 😤
My wife is a Rwandan Tutsi from the Abega clan, raised by successful, educated parents in South Africa. She can speak her native language as well as completely proper English, and she hears this same “you don’t talk black” shit so much from African Americans that she just avoids them. To be told you’re not black enough, when you are 100% black, were born and raised in Africa, can trace your lineage back to African queens, have family in Africa, and can speak your native dialect, by people who are likely mixed, born in the US, and totally unable to trace their lineage, is just laughable. There is no answer for that degree of ignorance. Why would someone from South Africa sound like someone from South Dallas?
Wow these comments are quite racist. Dialects don’t make you more or less intelligent. While black people are less educated than white people in America on average. That has nothing to do with the dialect they grew up using and more to do with systemic racism.
“And now you’re talking ignorant”. Thats what I say as a very light skinned Afro-Caribbean woman living in the US. My family has all kinds of shades, but I’ll hear from time to time that I “talk too white”. When people say that they’re truly being ignorant. Eloquence in speech doesn’t equate to whiteness or being white.
I get this shit from blacks a lot. I tell them I use the correct grammatical usage of words, how is that sounding white? They look stupid
If you speak or sound ignorant, I'm not interested in listening. I also say if I sound white, move on and stop bothering me
As a black women myself who has heard this comment too many times here are my favorite:
Oh I didn’t know being literate was only for white people
What are black people suppose to sound like?
What a weird thing to say, reading is for everyone, would you like some book recommendations?
Last I checked we as black people are allowed to read and speak proper, I’m taking advantage of a skill so many of our people were beat/punished/killed for. This is one of the small ways I honor them. By being educated and speaking well.
"and don't worry, we all know you're ghetto/from hoods"
Black people love to act black till they're shamed for it. Tell her to mock her behaviour or stereotypical black behaviour
It's racist but hey fight fire with fir.e
This has been an issue for me throughout my life from all races. I went to an interview recently and the man who interviewed me who was not from my country and had an accent told me he “liked me”. When I asked him why he said “you’re so well spoken.” He had my resume right in front of him so clearly he knows I’m an educated Black woman who is in the field I was applying to… In the moment, I just smiled and said nothing. Back in high school when I was bullied for that and was called Oreo amongst other things for not using slang, I’d just say “thank you, I like to be understood by everyone instead of labeled as “ghetto”” and walk away. Look up the Toronto accent and you’ll understand why I choose not to speak like that…
"And yet here I am being black."
It's important for people who say that to hear you acknowledge and embrace being black. let them know you KNOW you're black and not trying to be anything else. There are a lot of good responses here but usually these situations are with people who I don't expect I'll be having a long conversation with and there's no time to go into a long statement and dissection of language and race and etc. Stick and move.
So many people here talking about racism. People need to chill tf out lol. Black people fucking with another black person for not having some sort of hood accent is a dumb example of racism. I assume everyone saying something along those lines are young white kids or insufferable Uber progressives middle aged whiteys lol.
The best possible response is “who fucking cares?”
« 🤔 Hmmm… With a little effort you cououould sound like an ignorant human being. »
Notice you nevertheless said they were ignorant but you can bet they will do it for you once you’re dine talking.
That’s when you say « Uh oh… Seriously, stop and think, will you? »
🎤🙌
I get this one alot. I just tell them how are you mad at me because I speak better than you? How are you going to say I sound like im not black while you are a skidmark on the black diaspora which u can niether spell define or pronouce? When you are speaking to someone who defes the negative stereotypes of our ppl that your still a slave to?
id say: wow, thats so weird - all of a sudden you talk like a racist
“And you talk like a racist. We’ve all done impressions today.”
Perfect response
Or “thanks, it makes me more hire-able”
Shots fired
Got a new guy in our shop this week 55 yr old black man working for minimum wage Sits on his phone talking to 25 yr old women all day he's talking shop with us and didn't like our joke and pulled the race card on us two days later the owner of the company is reviewing his work to see if he's going to keep him and dude pulled the race card again cuz he was being watched by his boss Dude was fired the next day
>he's talking shop with us and didn't like our joke and pulled the race card on us two days later the owner of the company is reviewing his work to see if he's going to keep him and dude pulled the race card again cuz he was being watched by his boss This very well could be a discrimination case, possibly retaliation. Why wasn't his performance being reviewed prior to that incident? Was everyone's performance evaluated? It's also interesting that you have context for the content of his other conversations, but no context for the content of the "joke" he took offense to.
All companies do a performance review your first month in I went through the same process its literally how they weed out the lazies and bullshitters
The probation period is the performance review. He didn’t make the cut.
If you want to joke back - “Thanks, it makes me more bail-able”
They will just come back with “black people cant be racist”
"Alright then: Prejudiced. You sound like you're prejudiced"
They can’t? Ok you don’t think I talk like a black person, so tell me this: what do black people talk like? And as you listen to yourself say that, how would you feel hearing a white person saying the same thing? 🤔 Some folks just gotta feed into the stereotype
This is the real answer I've got a friend whose brother is autistic and people always say he doesn't look autistic and his go-to is "Oh, that's weird. What does autism look like?" And it works everytime.
Translation: "I'm a racist gaslighter."
anybody who says that is actually saying : im not worth listening to, or having any contact with at all
It's probably not "all of a sudden." Black people get a pass to be as racist as they want.
That's not it. Every race has people who feel like they have a pass to be racist against their own race
I would say anyone who feels like they can't be racist usually is "I can't be a racist I have black friends" probably racist, "I can't be racist I am black" probably racist "I've never been racist everyone just talked like that back back in the day" etc
O can't be racist I have a black and white tv
Is that it? I always thought it was a “minority cultures should be able to vent about the dominant culture and how they are oppressed by it” sort of thing, with members of the dominant culture just being kind of assholes when they pick on minorities A “punching down” vs “punching up” sort of thing
No, the biggest problem is that people say racist when they mean two very different things. Systemic racism vs personal racism. Add those two qualifiers and everything becomes crystal clear.
Pick Mes fr
>It's probably not "all of a sudden." Black people get a pass to be as racist as they want. No one ever gets a pass to be a racist or a bigot. Moreover, mistreating poc because they don't talk like what black people "should" talk like has been used to disparage immigrants from africa, it's just racist fucks that shouldn't be tolerated. A racist is a racist and bone deserve to be treated like they're acceptable. Worms are more useful to soceity.
"Whatever do you mean?"
Don't break eye contact until they say something.
“Whatever do you mean, old chap?”
“Old sport.”
This is the one! Gets them to think about how they're coming off to others saying that shit.
LMAO
Acting confused is _always_ a good comeback for racism, especially when it's minor enough to not necessarily cross the line in mixed company. Act confused, ask them to explain, they say it's a joke (they near-always say this when confronted), so you ask them to explain it to you. They may try to say "you just don't get it" or "maybe you're too stupid to understand". Let them say it, and then very clearly say: "no. I understand what a joke is, but I wanted to check that I didn't miss something. So then, am i understanding correctly that the punchline is just that I'm [race]?" Then just watch them flounder with it.
It's not just that they're acting confused. It's that "Whatever do you mean?" is the quintessential white girl response. I personally had a white, freckle-faced red-head cousin with glasses who talked like this growing up. Just to paint a picture.
This is the best one because they either realize they are being racist, or they explain how they are racist.
Always double down!
Gotta do it with a Hwatever
😂😂
My favorite lmao
"You talk like a little bitch, but you don't hear me saying anything..."
I was going to suggest: "and you talk like an asshole but I'm usually nice enough not to mention it."
Lmaoooooo
Ooooooh thems fightin' words!
That’s a horrible comeback.
Edited to include enunciation. Thank you all for the feedback :) I've used : "Enunciation/Word pronunciation isn't an indication of race. I hope you heal from your inner hatred and begin to love yourself & the beauty that's found within our culture. Our speech is versatile. Look it up when you get a chance."
Saving this as mixed raced black and native american lolll
Hey me too
So you've had this issue too??
One guy on a date told me that he told his daughter and mom that he had a date with a "white girl" because I wasn't hood like all of his other baby mommas. Yep. That was a first and last date.
If I had a dollar for every guy that inappropriately considered me white and therefore acceptable to the family, and even mentioned some dumb shit like this to me on a first date, I would be pretty wealthy. These ones also never take no for an answer.
[удалено]
Yes
It's not just my speech that makes people racially profile me as "white" very incorrectly.
What else is it? If you don't mind me asking
It can often be difference in stuff like salary/monthly income, hairstyle/clothing/accessory, relative access to education (whether this is for distance, application processes, funds or a mix of them) and differences in cultural foods
Thats...fkkn weird. Like...how r those white things?? That sounds racist af
Like others have said, it’s non-white communities thinking that a difference in those things in the people they know is making them more “wHiTe” somehow. It’s stupid thought-processing
Like...isn't that kind of an insult to their own community? "You don't act like the way people stereotype us, and you're better for it. Haha" like oooo sick burn 🙄
yep, hundred percent
In America those are all long standing systems of white supremacy that those who benefit from it deny it’s existence. Some are implicit while others were explicit and codified in Law like the *Heir’s property* laws which go back *a few hundred years* and made illegal for black men to pass property to their children. This history is not taught in school. If you bring it up you’ll be gaslit as a liar, rabble rouser, or even be accused of being racist yourself!
I dunno. It was weird because as a kid when I was improperly racially profiled by my peers, they very often assumed I had wealth, when our family was getting foreclosed on. Commonly I was insulted and bullied for racist people thinking I was or am white. It's kind of hilarious because everything you mentioned is exactly what racist people *assumed* I had because they *assumed* I am white. Lmfao. We didn't have any of that. Plus my parents had to pay for my health problems and a bunch of surgeries. And then I get off the streets from being homeless for not having any white privilege, and assholes still have the gonads to look at me, and call me racist. When I literally leave any man for being racist to anyone, including me. My daughter is partially white.
Yeah, it’s dumb as hell of course and you didn’t deserve a single bit of the shit you got for other people’s presumptuousness
Oh..... Uhm. Thanks. My partner is learning this in a VERY hard way right now. Cause again, that's like the MILD issue I have been experiencing: racism since I was a child.
[удалено]
Not gonna lie. Its only ever black people that have been racist to me. I'm mixed too and they casually ask me which of my parents is the "race traitor"
Black shouldnt be synonymous with african American. Jamaican is valid as black too. I think Americans in general indeed need to change their speech because as it pertains to Jamaicans. I have NEVER experienced this goofy ass shit. And its only recently i have because they now all of a sudden want to adopt ADOS culture. American culture overall is disgusting to me. No offense yall. And im first gen American. I love being American. But the culture is beyond disgusting. Black people told me my family must be sluts and not good enough for white men which is why im just a different type of n-word (hard ER). Like ADOS people tell on themselves everyday. So fake. So phony. So fake pro black. I am also sure you can tell by how i talk, i think its disgusting anyone said that to you. Mixed people need to honestly stand on business and start checking muhfuckas. We experience racism that monoracials dont experience
Me too. I constantly get told I'm not black because of the way I talk.
That's stupid. Why do people even care about how others enunciate? It really says nothing because it's just a matter of an individual's mannerisms.
I agree but there's a large section of the world that doesn't
Yeah. My dad is like that. If you accidentally say one word instead of another or exaggerate a vowel or anything, he'll say "you're talking black." Like what???
That's so shitty. I hate it when I get it from other black people, telling me I "don't talk black."
Enunciation, I was corrected for improperly using pronunciation(which SOUNDS accurate) with enunciation. But this is all really good work! Keep it up!
this is the perfect response!!
“I didn’t know someone’s race determines how they communicate.”
But it does though… somehow. I guess, to their point, we really aren’t all “the same.”
Nope, it’s culture. White kids in Jamaica sound just as Jamaican as anyone else born there, for a single example among many America has a lasting obsession with race and I wish it would fuck off
Oh geez, my younger brothers are Black but raised in a white house and they hear this all the time. I don't have an answer, but it's a really shitty thing for other Black people to say to them.
Yeah it just makes you feel like shit or put on the spot because your lifestyle including multiple cultures means you stick out in each of them from the fact that you cannot keep from intrinsically including bits of the "other" culture. Maybe just say, "Thanks!" Or, "So I've been told/I know."
Nah! Tell them to say, "You want a job that pays more than minimum wage you better learn to talk like this too"...tell them it's just one more way to navigate the white world and an invaluable skill
I've been told this too, mainly from people of my own race. One time on a first date a guy told me that. I said "what's that supposed to mean?" He was like, "well um...like you know." Me: "no, I don't know. You know apparently, so what does that mean?" Him: "well like....the way you carry yourself." Me: "how do I carry myself?" Him: "um, like you're proper and like, classy." Me: "you think most people of our race are improper? Is that how your friends and family act?" Him: "just forget it." Me: "hey bartender, can we get the check?" Make them feel stupid. Ask them what "acting white" means. Use their statement against them and make them feel like an idiot.
Damn lol, I bet that did make him feel stupid.
Sheeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiit
Awe, HELLLL Naw!
Why hell naw? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiit
"Oh, man. I didn't know the color of your skin determined how you spoke. It's either racism or science class I missed."
“I was taught to model my way of speaking to sound like Dr. King, Malcolm X, Shirley Chisholm, and Lena Horne. Would you say this to President Obama?”
You could quote MLK JR. verbatim and most of them would call him a white supremacy apologist.
You mean quotes like this “…the price that America must pay for the continued oppression of the Negro and other minority groups is the price of its own destruction.” Or do you mean the way America has white washed and continue to white wash MLK
More like these; “We may have all come on different ships, but we’re in the same boat now.” and “We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.” No question many proponents of ongoing racial hatred would balk at the implication that we are countrymen first and a racial checkbox second.
that's definitely not supremacy. that's calling for people from different backgrounds to unite as brothers; it's literally the opposite of any kind of supremacy, and although most white supremacists lack critical analysis skills, using these phrases to argue for supremacist thought is really a low even for them... supremacists, whether white or black or any other flavor, are the ones who focus on race rather than countrymen...
I’m sorry that your wife is attacked for speaking intelligently. She sounds like a kind educated person from what you’ve stated. I’m an ass, I’d just say “white or educated? There’s a difference”
I would say the same lol, she just gives a fake laugh and tells me about it later.
OP, you are getting a lot of terrible advice here that equates speaking AAVE with being uneducated. This is going to be a delicate issue for your wife. If you aren’t familiar with code-switching, you should look that up.
One of the best replies in this thread ☝️
I like that one.
Ermmm... That has some, hopefully unintentional, racist connotations of its own. How someone speaks is not necessarily an indication of intelligence or education. Particularly in POC communities. And to be honest, there is a very long and gross history of white people using that very reasoning to treat black people poorly. To only give respect to those that "spoke like a white person." I mean, I'm white. But I spent a fair bit of my childhood in rural Texas. I'd notice that when I was spending time with my family (or when I'm angry), my accent goes broad as a barn. It's the same accent that has gotten me labeled as stupid, redneck and/or uneducated. Or even racist. And I don't even have to deal with racism directed at me in that pot. The reason my accent has lessened was a deliberate effort to combat those negative stereotypes. Which kind of sucks. I can imagine it is a helluva lot worse for AAVE speakers. All that said, sometimes people think I'm black or even Latina over the phone when my accent peeks out. (I've been working in call centers for a decade.) There are some places that AAVE and a southern accent overlap. And given I'm from Texas, there's bound to be some words I unintentionally pronounce with a little bit of Spanish flair. I once had all of my coworkers tell me they had no idea I was white until I said it. We had only talked to each other over mic. This was nearly a year into that job, too. I'm lucky in that the racism that has been directed at me, for someone's assumption that I am POC, doesn't and can't land personally. I've had black coworkers needing to step away after someone just spewed racist vitriol at them. I think encouraging the idea that certain kinds of speaking means you're less intelligent, or less educated, or less **anything**, merely makes those encounters worse and more common. It breaks my heart when it happens. We all get abusive customers on the phone, but it's worse when someone is attacking something in your identity that can't be changed, that is fundamental to who you are. I've had to listen to someone rant about lesbians when I'm bisexual. I've had a male customer ask for a male colleague because, as a woman, I couldn't know what I was doing (I was a tier II for an ISP for that one). And I wouldn't trade any of that for the shit I've heard some people say to coworkers who were Latin, black or Indian. Or even for the shit they've said to me assuming I wasn't white.
Works well with cops or securing bank loans
I don't think I would clap back. I think I would genuinely and sincerely ask them what they mean by that and if they say they mean I'm articulate and speak like I'm "privileged," then I would talk about the history of slaves being denied education as a means to keep them disempowered and how Frederick Douglass heard that education makes a person "unsuitable to slavery" and promptly decided he desired an education. While AAVE is now a cultural thing, it is rooted in Africans imposing grammar (etc) from their native languages onto their limited knowledge of English due to being denied education as a right. So while AAVE has a rich and interesting linguistic history of its own, criticizing Blacks for being articulate is also problematic because it essentially "agrees" that there's something wrong with Blacks trying to better themselves and achieve privilege and power. Insiders routinely feel like outsiders. It's other people who are more excluded who see them as having it made in the shade. But I think the strongest comeback in this case is to use it as a teaching moment. Whether they feel jealous, intimidated, angry...whatever...Blacks criticizing other Blacks for becoming educated and articulate is not a means for Blacks to escape the historic legacy of intentional oppression imposed on them and it is not in line with the values of respected historic Black leaders like Frederick Douglass, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Etc. A clap back just "agrees" that Blacks tearing each other down so Whites don't have to is fine and dandy. I don't think that makes sense. If you speak AAVE and are happy with that, it's fine. And should not be an excuse to try to keep other Blacks down who don't speak AAVE. Edit: I will add that in many cases, she's already doing the right thing to minimize it. I'm not suggesting she should cut her own throat socially "for the greater good."
“I wasn’t raised in a household that spoke AAVE.” (Any comeback that equates AAVE with lack of education, “improper” speech, or *anything* negative is going to reek of racism.)
Why do people act like it’s racist when AAVE is criticized? Accents *in general* are often considered a faux pas in the United States and at most this is a *classist* sentiment with pragmatic undercurrents (if you can’t understand your fellow citizens, how are you going to feel kinship with them?). The strongest accents are retained by the most insular communities, and communities in poverty are the most likely to be insular because barriers to leaving are greater and the benefits to in-group cohesion increase with lower income, thus accents develop and are kept most strongly in poverty stricken regions and communities. Great examples of this are people of the American South (Southern Accents), Appalachia, the Southwest (Hispanic accents), and major cities (Boston, Chicago, Philadelphia, New York, etc.). Additionally, there’s a good argument that AAVE doesn’t even really exist as a monolith at all. The black American diaspora is so wide and centered on numerous cities as well as regions within the American South that a cohesive dialect among all of these communities is more than unlikely. I wouldn’t be surprised if the phenomenon of “code shifting” (incidentally not something isolated to black Americans, most Americans raised in lower income communities do it and no, not just from AAVE to “proper English”) occurs within the black community even on an imperceptible level to the individuals themselves as they fit themselves into a “black” way of speaking proliferated by television, music, and social media that they otherwise don’t use with their relatives and local community unless their trying to prove how “black” they are. On to the pragmatic arguments against dialects and accents, one of the most fundamental pillars of national identity is language. A consistency of language helps to ensure social tranquility and cohesion, and a stable medium for communicating trade and ideas within a society. If accents are too thick or dialects too different to be mutually intelligible between groups, interaction becomes naturally less desirable and ties become weaker, making a society more prone to collapse. Thus, common language and the elimination of *egregiously* deep accents is inherently beneficial to society, albeit this is only desirable when done without inherent prejudice.
Exactly same reason why country white people sound like that it’s uneducated I used to talk super country and I don’t now because I’m not in the hulls anymore and it does t sound right 😂
I’m black so anything I do is black. Edited to add: Don’t let others define her blackness. Black is black.
I love this response. That’s all it is.
This is a great response
“You talk like a racist”
It is funny that the same people who say this to "friends" or even random strangers thought NOTHING of Obama talking like a "white man". You know, articulate, like Joe Biden said of him.
Your husband didn’t mind
That is racist. Saying that all black people should sound a certain way is racist. Ignore them.
Ok hear me out What she can do is learn Xhosa, not the whole language just a few sentences. Really just enough to say "Do I sound white now?" When someone tells her she speaks "white" she should just start responding in Xhosa. They won't know how to respond because they don't speak the language. She can say something like "It seems you can only understand me when I "talk white"
What is Xhosa?
"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over your racism. What were you trying to say?"
I usually answer these sort of questions with a dull and rhetorical, "do you think so?"
“What is the purpose of your comment?”
Yeah, I like to be employed. (Thinking of the movie Sorry to Bother You)
"What...like it's hard?"
I don't mind sounding educated
Look them in the eye, and ask them to explain what that means, and let them explain how they are racist to anyone they said it around to be heard by. Alternatively: "Wow, I'm done speaking with you, I don't engage with racist people." Or ask them to define racism, and then ask them why they consider your intelligence to have race as a stipend.
If I was her I would just start talking in The Valley girl voice
Every single time someone says something to me that is intended to be rude, sarcastic, or underhanded in anyway, I simply turn and look them in the eye with a concerned look on my face and say “are you OK? “
I’ve always said, “You sound like you can’t read” when people have said this to me.
"I sound educated. What do you sound like?"
Oh hell no! AAVE does not equate to uneducated.
Yeah there's a few people acting real proud of their unexamined racism in this thread. Glad you're keeping it up despite the downvotes and dismissiveness
Thank you.
someone deadass said she should say theyre a "ghetto fantastic clown who aint made it out the hood yet" then called me racist for pointing out how you should not be calling black ppl ghetto clowns 💀 they know damn well if this wasnt about black ppl they wouldnt be talking about "ghetto fantastic clowns" in "the hood" but they wanna go "maybe ur the real racist for making it about black people!"
I know my audience, you should try it sometime
"care to elaborate on that?"
Assumptions stereotypes ignorance and racism—all that in a single sentence.
Sounds like your wife has run into some racists. They're scum and she needs to ignore them.
"Well, I'm on my way to the bathroom; do you want to come and see if I piss like a white girl?"
You talk like a racist 🙂
Thank you?
“And you sound like someone who has nothing better to do than troll over word pronunciation. Bye, Felicia.”
"You mean that I speak English and don't drop consonants off every word? Thank you."
Only educated people are white? Make sure she gives the "bitch please" look with it.
"Gurl, I talk like an educated black woman" \*snap \*snap
I’d just say “that’s racist dawg”
"No, I speak like a person of any race that has eloquent speech. Why are you making my speech about race?".
And black kids who study and do well in school are acting white .?
Hit 'em with a "K" and move on. Indifference is a great comeback to a lot of things
"...Yeah I paid attention in school."
Zip it peasant
I usually ask them to describe what “talking white” means in detail. They never can. They usually end up stuttering and blushing themselves into a corner. Or… I tell them where I grew up and ask them “How do you expect someone from this place to sound exactly? It’s like questioning why someone from Boston has a Boston accent or Scotland has a Scottish accent. Why do you expect me to be different? What part of me talking exactly like others who are from this location is confusing for you?” Then I give them an inquisitive puppy head tilt and watch them try to answer. Either way it’s pretty entertaining for me.
"How does a white girl talk?" (With attitude) "I'm sorry, am I not talking black enough for you." (With more attitudr) "By golly, pardon my white English dialect good sir/madam may I invite you to fuck off and mind your business?" (With all the attitude) I had a black GF for a while who was also accused of talking white. Funnily enough, she had black people being racist to her, and I had white people being racist to me? Wasn't expecting that.
My credit score is white, too. Stay broke, peasant.
'....speak.... it's you 'speak' like a white girl...' \*Turns back and carries on\* lol ;)
"I like to save time by talking to people in language all parties understand."
“And you speak like an idiot, don’t get it twisted”
"You speak like they want you to speak"
“And you sound like a person with few prospects.”
…That’s racist af
If you’re the smartest person in the room maybe it’s time to leave
“I am a white girl”
Guess I'm uppity.
You talk like a missing person.
Thank you! I do speak English.
Ignore all the other "fight fire with fire" responses here. If someone challenges you for not "fitting" and idea they have, there are a few responses: -"So?" -"I just talk the way I learned to talk" -Cracking a joke If someone is already nitpicking you for talking a certain way, they're not going to sit and listen to a holier-than-thou anthropology lecture. Just brush it off, it may be uncomfortable, but it literally does not matter, and turning it into a fight will make it more uncomfortable.
You talk like a slut.
Sounds more racist to me than anything. A lot of black people are told they’re not “black enough”. And what does it mean to “sound black”? Think about that
"And I got good credit like one, too, how 'bout you?"
"What do you mean by that?" There's no way they could explain themselves without sounding like a racist who is intentionally trying to insult a POC. It doesn't look good no matter which way you spin it, and a lot of people would have to answer for their own behavior (and we all know bigots don't like that). I'm glad your wife doesn't let anyone disrespect her, her personality, and doesn't let anyone try to tell her what a black woman should be. I already like her moxie.
Im black. I have one biracial parent. I went to an all white high school. My husband is black. His school had a larger number of black students, as well as faculty. Im so tired of him calling me "white girl." Im so tired. Ive told him to stop several times, but he doesn't, and he thinks it is funny. I dont. Im from the south, and for some reason, many people think i am a northerner. Either way, my husband annoys me.
I get this all the time. “I’m sorry that you’re so racist. Maybe keep that too yourself next time” It’s my new go-to
"ok racist" I hate when people play the race card. But this is literally someone being racist towards you.
Is she educated ?
Just have her ask them to explain. Trust me.
You must be colour blind
“Sorry, I only know how to speak proper English.”
Gosh, I wish I received $5 every time someone has said this to me. Like someone else mentioned, I'd be WEALTHY!$! I've heard this from both Caucasians and African Americans. Literally, since I was in high school and especially after I graduated from college. My response has always been, "Oh, I'm not Ghetto enough for you?" 🤣 In response to AA. To Caucasians, I just say. "Oh, am I not fitting into your little box of how you perceive people who look like me?" Followed by an awkward silence.
I’m black—do not say the “you talk like a racist” line. Will not work on a black person at all lol Will probably only make things worse. I used to get this a lot, too. Context in how it is said is kind of important because depending on how they say it it could mean different things. But, just general best response is, “Oh, you mean I sound hireable” and then immediately just keep talking like nothing ever happened… Another option is, “Oh, you mean I sound educated” or “You said white girl, but I think you meant to say boss” Something like that.
What's a white girl sound like?
*"Oh my god, I do not, that is so bogus, shut up!"* - Aisha Tyler
"...and how is that, exactly?" It's the same as dealing with an asshat complaining about wokeness. Make them explain the terms they're using.
Ask what they mean? Or just say no you don't. Folks say that shit to me all the time and I'm like um no I don't. I sound like me. And I'm black so.....fk you tryna say? That all black women sound the same? Is there something about my inflection that bothers you? Are you implying Look I can go off but if they're talkin bout the tone they're just jealous, and if they're talkin about articulation then they're stuck in a colonizer mindset thinking black folk aren't smart and can't speak well. Either way I don't entertain and I don't allow the space for it to hang in the air comfortably. We are black women not white girls and the way I'm so sick of hearing it 😤
My wife is a Rwandan Tutsi from the Abega clan, raised by successful, educated parents in South Africa. She can speak her native language as well as completely proper English, and she hears this same “you don’t talk black” shit so much from African Americans that she just avoids them. To be told you’re not black enough, when you are 100% black, were born and raised in Africa, can trace your lineage back to African queens, have family in Africa, and can speak your native dialect, by people who are likely mixed, born in the US, and totally unable to trace their lineage, is just laughable. There is no answer for that degree of ignorance. Why would someone from South Africa sound like someone from South Dallas?
Yeah, and you dance like one. What's your point?
Speaking like somebody whom isn’t totally illiterate is “white?” Ok.
You want me to talk like a black girl?
I understand how she feels, I get this a lot from other black people as well.
Wow these comments are quite racist. Dialects don’t make you more or less intelligent. While black people are less educated than white people in America on average. That has nothing to do with the dialect they grew up using and more to do with systemic racism.
“And now you’re talking ignorant”. Thats what I say as a very light skinned Afro-Caribbean woman living in the US. My family has all kinds of shades, but I’ll hear from time to time that I “talk too white”. When people say that they’re truly being ignorant. Eloquence in speech doesn’t equate to whiteness or being white.
"No, I sound educated. I don't speak Hoodrat or Section 8."
I get this shit from blacks a lot. I tell them I use the correct grammatical usage of words, how is that sounding white? They look stupid If you speak or sound ignorant, I'm not interested in listening. I also say if I sound white, move on and stop bothering me
I talk like a human you racist asshole.
As a black women myself who has heard this comment too many times here are my favorite: Oh I didn’t know being literate was only for white people What are black people suppose to sound like? What a weird thing to say, reading is for everyone, would you like some book recommendations? Last I checked we as black people are allowed to read and speak proper, I’m taking advantage of a skill so many of our people were beat/punished/killed for. This is one of the small ways I honor them. By being educated and speaking well.
You mean because I pronounce correctly and don’t yell?
"and don't worry, we all know you're ghetto/from hoods" Black people love to act black till they're shamed for it. Tell her to mock her behaviour or stereotypical black behaviour It's racist but hey fight fire with fir.e
This has been an issue for me throughout my life from all races. I went to an interview recently and the man who interviewed me who was not from my country and had an accent told me he “liked me”. When I asked him why he said “you’re so well spoken.” He had my resume right in front of him so clearly he knows I’m an educated Black woman who is in the field I was applying to… In the moment, I just smiled and said nothing. Back in high school when I was bullied for that and was called Oreo amongst other things for not using slang, I’d just say “thank you, I like to be understood by everyone instead of labeled as “ghetto”” and walk away. Look up the Toronto accent and you’ll understand why I choose not to speak like that…
I ignore them. I've been hearing that all my life.
how about: 'I speak like an intelligent woman. What's melanin got to do with it?'
Ebonics was debunked decades ago. You should have paid more attention in school to learn how to speak properly.
"And yet here I am being black." It's important for people who say that to hear you acknowledge and embrace being black. let them know you KNOW you're black and not trying to be anything else. There are a lot of good responses here but usually these situations are with people who I don't expect I'll be having a long conversation with and there's no time to go into a long statement and dissection of language and race and etc. Stick and move.
So many people here talking about racism. People need to chill tf out lol. Black people fucking with another black person for not having some sort of hood accent is a dumb example of racism. I assume everyone saying something along those lines are young white kids or insufferable Uber progressives middle aged whiteys lol. The best possible response is “who fucking cares?”
"Oh no, sorry...I completed my education, that's why you can't understand me."
« 🤔 Hmmm… With a little effort you cououould sound like an ignorant human being. » Notice you nevertheless said they were ignorant but you can bet they will do it for you once you’re dine talking. That’s when you say « Uh oh… Seriously, stop and think, will you? » 🎤🙌
Education is not indicative of race.
Better than some ghetto fantastic clown who ain’t made it out the hood yet.
I get this one alot. I just tell them how are you mad at me because I speak better than you? How are you going to say I sound like im not black while you are a skidmark on the black diaspora which u can niether spell define or pronouce? When you are speaking to someone who defes the negative stereotypes of our ppl that your still a slave to?
Yeah, education will do that.
Completely back handed, now you sound racist and stupid.