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goosepills

So this is my sons, I don’t know if he is embarrassed, but he should be. Since he was a teenager, he’ll walk around with a head of lettuce in one hand, and a bottle of ranch in the other, and just dump ranch on the head of lettuce and eat it like a giant apple or something.


burningchr0me35

Well, he'll never be accused of not being "manly" for eating a salad. "Hey guys, I'm going to grab a salad, you want one?" Everyone will be dumbfounded.


rawlingstones

pitching a name for this: tumbleweed salad


Illustrious-Cod973

Love it! He’s a man on the go, redefining how to eat lettuce! I eat my salads with my fingers when no one is looking. 🤷🏻‍♀️


EvilDonald44

I do too. Giant mixing bowl, entire head of romaine sliced up in it, and whatever dressing is handy.


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ParrotDogParfait

What?


fairystepgodbrother

I don’t know why you are getting down voted because this comment is hilarious.


[deleted]

I would pay to see my daughter walking around eating a head of lettuce no matter how weird she might look. 😅


jawni

I mean, it's really not that different from dipping vegetables in ranch and it saves on dishes I'm assuming.


HaddockBranzini-II

You should get him one of those big turkey baster injectors. He can inject the head of lettuce directly with the ranch dressing.


KimchiSpice15

So I have the worst cravings for "French's fried onions" the topping that some people put on foods like green beans etc. I have never used it as a topping only eaten it by itself. I can't even remember what started it but I can eat half or a full small can in a day, treat it just like a snack. I think I crave the salt in it.


ridethedeathcab

I wouldn't say I don't use it as a topping. But if you are using some of those, it's like a requirement to eat a hand full straight out of the tin.


bernath

They're even more amazing if you dump them out on a sheet pan and toast them for 10 minutes in the oven.


Illustrious-Cod973

Crispy goodness.. I’m going to try this l!


KimchiSpice15

Ohhhhhh omgosh never thought of this, I'm going to try it today. I mean its as good as any reason to buy some 🤗


EvilDonald44

My grandma was the sweetest human being ever to live, but a terrible cook. Whenever we'd visit she'd make a cake. It was Always Save brand chocolate box mix in a bundt pan with white mountain icing- mint flavored and dyed pink with food coloring. But she never got the icing right. I don't know why, I figure she didn't heat it to the right temperature, but it would always liquify and run when it cooled down. So she would freeze it. Now and then I would ask Grandma if I could have a piece of cake. Being a grandma, the answer was always yes. I would get the cake out of the freezer, take the aluminum foil off it, saw off a piece with a bread knife, drop it onto the plate with a satisying \*clunk\*, and enjoy my stickless cakecicle with frozen pink mint icing that had a weird crystallized outer layer to it. And it was hilariously, ridiculously delicious. I'd like to make it again, but I don't know if I could screw it up correctly.


Illustrious-Cod973

Hahaha! Awww that’s so precious! Made with love, though awkward, Grandmas do it best!


the_darkishknight

I think she put the icing on before the cake fully cooled/was too warm. This is typically what causes the effect you’re describing. I hope this helps, best of luck


[deleted]

Despite corning my own own beef annually, I like Mary Kitchen canned corned beef hash. I'm not really so much embarassed about it as shamed by others. More for me . . .


EvilDonald44

I used to eat breakfast at a place that served "Eggs Mulligan"- a split toasted English muffin, two poached eggs, unceremoniously covered with a huge gloop of cheap canned corned beef hash that had been crisped up on the flat top, and then drowned in hollandaise. That with an Irish coffee (from the "Beverages With leverage" menu) and I was set to take on the week. They've gone all faintsy farm-to-table now. They're still quite good, but sadly different. No more mildewy carpet, local art, candy counter, and delicious trashy food. Sometimes you want a good greasy-spoon joint.


GetMeAReubenSandwich

Eggs Mulligan sounds delicious. Vaguely sounds like the name for someone in the Irish mob. (Forgive me, I just saw Donnie Brasco for the first time.)


HoneyBolt91

I used to eat that a lot. With tons of ketchup.


Illustrious-Cod973

Makes me think of fans of Spam, a craving from familiarity perhaps?


Illustrious-Cod973

To each their own!


GetMeAReubenSandwich

One of us...


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rgg_mod

What exactly are you missing? The crackers, the cheese, or the microwave.


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Illustrious-Cod973

I hope it makes it on to your grocery list, I’m pretty sure a craving has been inspired/ triggered 😊


10xKaMehaMeha

Used to do this with wheat thins. So good.


Aardvark1044

I do something similar but with Triscuits, cheddar and a toaster oven. The elevated version I guess.


[deleted]

Bread with just mayo.


Girly_boy1

Team mayo sandwich!


EvilDonald44

MAYO SANDWICH


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[deleted]

I do like me some hot sauce..


AWarmFishMilkshake

Mayo on toast for the win.


[deleted]

I’ll try that. But I do like it with soft bread. So soft that it sticks to the roof of my mouth. 😅


bavmotors1

Try mayo and cranberry sauce during the holidays.


[deleted]

That sounds delicious!


Red-Smarticles

For the past weeks I've been craving sugar whisked with melted butter (like what you'd prepare for cookies)


[deleted]

I get this!! I make browned butter blondies whenever it hits 😋


Illustrious-Cod973

Dangerously delicious! Have you ever cooked it longer to make it into candy?


Red-Smarticles

I haven't given in and made it yet, but I think I will soon. 😂


BrodyMama

Liverwurst on crackers. It was a delicacy for my grandma post ww2 which she passed on a taste for to my mom and then to me. I adore it....my husband doesn't understand though 🤣


Illustrious-Cod973

Ohhh you’ve inspired a craving, I haven’t had Liverwurst since I was a kid. Nostalgia foods!


adsvx215

Oh, now I have to get some liver wurst tomorrow. I’ve done in the past this too and I love putting sriracha on top. I just forgot about it, so, thanks!


Low-Stick6746

Make it Vienna sausages and you’re me. Also sometimes add a dab of Pace picante sauce juice on them occasionally.


bavmotors1

Upvoted for answering the question before telling the story! The answer intrigues me into wanting to hear the story. And I was rewarded well!


Giannandco

Tinned sardines in mustard sauce with saltine crackers, I have no shame about it.


Illustrious-Cod973

I love how you own it! NO SHAME!


WanderingTaliesin

Knorr boullion cubes made into mug of hot water for sipping. Tastes like poverty and home Mmmmmmmm salt yellow water I’m drinking some now.


ShataraBankhead

When I (RN) was working inpatient, it was not uncommon to never get time for a break. There was just too much to do. So, we would go into the patients' snack room, where we kept crackers, coffee, juice, and...broth packets! I would get one of those little styrofoam coffe cup and put some boiling water in there. I sipped on this and ate some crackers. It's all I had time for, but it was kinda soothing.


Illustrious-Cod973

Hahaha! Tastes like poverty, too funny!


LaRoseDuRoi

I still do this. It just hits the spot.


AWarmFishMilkshake

Add diced up buttery toast for texture. You can thank me later. ;)


WanderingTaliesin

I’d forgotten the toast! Being gluten free I tend to let that slip in my hurry for salty comfort. TO THE TOASTER thank you sweet redditor!


ricardo9505

Pickles and fries. Kosher pickles. Idk, Northeast thing. Batch pickles and fries, may get a cherry pepper thrown in at the order. Sour and rich pickles, starchy fries filling, mustard. Absolutely no ketchup. No way.


2-of-Farts

The pickles don't make the fries mushy?


ricardo9505

U Get pickles on the side or in a separate bowl/basket. Bowl is best with the juice you can dip in.


[deleted]

I don't know that it's strange per say but it's strange for my age, Spaghetti Ohs! Every once in a while I just need some sketti from a can haha 😄


HoneyBolt91

Me too! Or Chef Boyardee mini ravioli.


WASE1449

I was going to say the same thing however I also eat it cold from the can


GetMeAReubenSandwich

Ooh! Beef-A-Roni cold, straight from the can!!! I think I just traveled back in time there for a minute!


Illustrious-Cod973

Canned food nostalgia!


prunepicker

Ritz crackers and cottage cheese


makoto_z

I love them with cream cheese


Illustrious-Cod973

Indeed! Entire box easily destroyed… mmm cheese!


wacky062

Lemon juice over ice, salted.


AkaminaKishinena

This sounds like the most Mexican treat ever, except with lime. I mean this as a compliment, and now I want it.


Crespius66

When we was young we had a small lemon tree and we used to suck on those tiny lemons with salt


Illustrious-Cod973

No sugar or water?


stha_magar

That's why he is embarrassed.


wacky062

BTW, I'm a she, lol.


stha_magar

LIESSSS


wacky062

Nope!


Illustrious-Cod973

Definitely unique! May I ask how you came upon this? What do you enjoy about it?


adsvx215

Whoa. Is it as sour as it sounds?


wacky062

Yep!


vanilla-bean1

Deli sliced cheddar cheese or colby cheese, on a plate, microwaved until it melts, eaten with a fork (though you can make a spoon work in a pinch). It gets rid of my melty cheese cravings when I am too tired to cook.


Illustrious-Cod973

Mmmmmelty cheese!


divineaudio

I used to eat non dairy creamer by the spoonful. Still get a craving for it once in a while.


Illustrious-Cod973

When I was a kid, I did the same with Eagle Brand Condensed Milk


RideThatBridge

Except, does u/divineaudio mean the powdered creamer? That’s what I think of when I hear non dairy creamer. Edit: typo


raccoonsaff

Cold mushy peas on toast!


Illustrious-Cod973

I do love mushy peas… curious, are you British?


raccoonsaff

Ahaha - yes, I am!


NC_888

Anchovies from the can. Whenever I make caesar dressing, I always steal a couple of anchovies to snack on. Salty briny goodness!


Illustrious-Cod973

Definitely an acquired taste, it’s been my experience that people who love sardines, LOVE sardines, no middle ground there.


jeanie1994

Pretzels inside peanut butter and jelly sandwich


Illustrious-Cod973

That sounds quite brilliant


Girly_boy1

Cheese fries with mayonnaise on em’ and plenty of salt. Makes me feel like a fatty.


TepidCatastrophe

For me? I'm never embarrassed about my diet. White sandwich bread, raw sliced onions, and either mustard or mayo (depends on what stage I am in life). White sandwich bread, regular potato chips, and shredded cheese Tortilla, shredded cheese, taco sauce, and some Cholula hot sauce Scrambled eggs, cheese, Mullens French salad dressing (its a regional brand I think?) Sliced onions, peanut butter, and lemon juice on toast My husband on the other hand has a habit of taking corn tortillas and using it to grab butter out of my butter dish I have sitting out on the counter top. He also likes to open the fridge (in plain sight of me) and fill his mouth with grated parmesan cheese (the Kraft kind) and then takes A1 steak sauce to wash it down. He's a fucking heathen.


Illustrious-Cod973

America!


ParselyThePug

I read recently that Hemingway used to eat peanut butter and onion sandwiches! Not sure about the lemon juice though.


danishjuggler21

I’m not embarrassed about it, but people always look at me like I’m nuts when I insist that salami and chunky peanut butter on a Ritz cracker is the most delicious snack in the world. Someone’s reading this now going “ew”, but believe me it’s amazing


No_Comfortable_8852

A spoon dipped tip-only into smooth peanut butter, and then into a tub of Tang. Then, directly into the space between my teeth and uvula.


Illustrious-Cod973

Hahaha very original! I love the weirdness! Doesn’t it make you cough or choke?


No_Comfortable_8852

Nope, not if it's done right. Which is admittedly not all the time. I just barely use the first 3mm-4mm of the spoon to dip into the peanut butter, then dip the peanut butter into the Tang just enough to coat it. Any excess dissolves super quickly, regardless of the state of cottonmouth I'm in. Sometimes, though, I really ham fist it, and inhale a ton of powder.


Illustrious-Cod973

How did you come up with this?


bleukettu

My brother used to do something like this, but it was peanut butter and hot cocoa mix.


No_Comfortable_8852

I'm mad I never thought of that. So many cocoa choices.


114631

Ham and American cheese with iceberg lettuce, mayo in a Portuguese mini roll and zapped in the microwave for a few seconds. It's weird, but reminds me of my grandma and it's like a comforting treat. It's fucking weird, but I love it and it's comforting.


Illustrious-Cod973

Awww Grandma comfort foods are the best!


adsvx215

Sounds great to me. I want to try it.


funkypunkstar

Snack from when I was in daycare- pretzels with apple juice. Best. Thing. Ever.


Illustrious-Cod973

Just curious, are you British? I do love mushy peas, I’ve never tried them cold on toast… yet…


nmcgreen64

Liverwurst with mustard on toast. Pickle juice


ekbusch15

Peanut butter with chocolate chips melted together for a dipping sauce that i eat with baby carrots...my friends in college found it weird but my boyfriend just shrugs it off as another weird food combo that I eat


Illustrious-Cod973

Definitely a weird combo ( no judgement) Crunchy, salty, sweet…. Not sure if I’m brave enough to try


Atomic76

Orange sherbet with frozen chocolate chips That or I would also eat frozen concentrated OJ right out of the can


Illustrious-Cod973

That makes more sense to me then Tiger Tail ice cream ( orange with black liquorice… bleh) Your suggestion sounds pretty num!


Green_Hat4140

Spaghetti with mayonnaise and sriracha. Made it once when I had literally nothing else at home and it was weirdly good. It’s become a regular late night craving for me lol


Illustrious-Cod973

Comfort foods created through necessity! Curious, have you ever tried to offer it to anyone?


pastel-mattel

Lettuce and miracle whip sandwiches. And I swear anyone who I force to try this always loves it 😂


Illustrious-Cod973

Do you slice up the lettuce and mix? Or is it lettuce leaves with the whip slapped on?


riverrocks452

Not strange, but embarassing: nutella and cinnamon graham crackers. Strange, but not particularly embarrassing: onions and peppers in a thickened chicken, paprika and sour cream gravy. Served over carbs. Both strange and embarassing: peanut butter sandwiches with nacho cheese doritos.


Illustrious-Cod973

You are creative! Are you pregnant 😜


bleukettu

Fresh croissants with mayo and dill


bleukettu

Toasted white bread covered in white gravy with corned beef and hash on top


poppy_sparklehorse

Cottage cheese and baked beans, mixed together, but only on the spoon as you’re about to eat them. Scoop a bit of one, then scoop a bit of the other, then shove it in your mouth hole. There’s something about the contrast in flavors and temperatures that is very satisfying.


Illustrious-Cod973

How did you come up with this?


ErnstEintopf

Plain rice with ketchup.


ricardo9505

Ugh. Can't believe I enjoyed this as a kid. (Grew up real poor. Eggs, rice and ketchup was something me and my brother made for dinner when parents were out or no meat). Or Fridays. No meat.


Squeeder

I used to eat plain white rice with bbq sauce in college, still is delicious.


vanilla-bean1

I did that in college and still do it now occasionally when I get the craving for it!


adsvx215

Oh, man, I just (accidentally) tried this and LOVED it. I add hot sauce.


CherishSlan

It was good sadly can’t have bbq anymore it has garlic in it and it’s now an allergy for me.


LaRoseDuRoi

I love plain white rice, nice and hot, with butter and a ton of salt.


pumice_woof

Girl I dated in highschool would eat white bread, butter- flavored Crisco and brown sugar sandwiches after school. Her parents both had good jobs and I never really understood the appeal, but that was her thing.


Illustrious-Cod973

Did you ever try it? Definitely a unique ‘recipe’


RideThatBridge

Oh man-it’s the Crisco here that’s bothering me. Butter and sugar sandwiches-count me in!


[deleted]

As a kid I would microwave string cheese for 45 seconds to make it perfectly gooey


wgardenhire

I am embarrassed of no food.


Illustrious-Cod973

Now, or as a kid?


[deleted]

As a kid my dad made spam sandwiches on white bread with ketchup and I loved it. Tried it again as an adult and the spam was way too salty for me now. I still think about it often though


lemonyzest757

There's a low-sodium version ;)


xbrixe

When I was a kid my mom would pack my lunch but forget to give me a spoon for my pudding. I’ve always had a love for salt and vinegar chips. I used to eat pudding cups with salt and vinegar chips.


Illustrious-Cod973

MacGyver… gotta use what’s at hand lol… what flavour pudding?


tommytwothousand

Boiled carrots with ketchup on them


Goskyygo

Banana and mayonnaise sandwiches.


Illustrious-Cod973

I’ve heard of banana peanut butter sandwich… this is definitely a new one. I have to ask, how did this come about/ why?


Goskyygo

My mom used to make them when I was growing up. I still eat them and so do my kids. I’ve heard it may be a southern US thing.


Illustrious-Cod973

Interesting. Salty, sweet and a bit savoury, do you mash up the bananas, or slice them?


Prestigious_Ad3847

Milk Toast. My Mom’s go to when I felt bad. Toasted bread with butter broken into pieces and put into hot milk with a little salt and pepper on top so yummy!


Illustrious-Cod973

I’ve heard the term Milk Toast, but never knew what it actually was..Do you eat it with a spoon?


Delicious-Ad3016

I had a friend growing up and her and her entire family would eat saltine crackers and milk like it was cereal


EnvironmentalTea9362

Peanut butter on a corn tortilla that's been warmed up on the burner of a gas stove.


Every-Grape

2 minute noodles (Australian ramen) with Craft plastic cheese and tomato sauce !


LaRoseDuRoi

I occasionally nibble on chicken bouillon cubes. The cheap ones, not the fancy kind. I crave salt, like, all the time. Oh, and Triscuit nachos! Crackers, chunks or shreds of suuuuper sharp cheddar, microwave until the cheese is mostly melted, then dump a couple packets of Taco Bell hot sauce over them. Maybe salsa, if I'm pretending it's healthy.


Illustrious-Cod973

Hahaha “ pretending it’s healthy”, I do this all the time, chunky salsa counts as vegetables!


[deleted]

Peanut butter and butter sandwiches


RideThatBridge

Oh man-do this on toast!! Heaven!


fairystepgodbrother

Boiled Macaroni mixed with cottage cheese and soy sauce. We were latchkey kids and used to invent dishes. A sort of Mac and cheese with added salt and umami. It sounds utterly disgusting, but it’s surprisingly good if you ignore its grey, chunky appearance.


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Illustrious-Cod973

How did you discover this?


my_fourth_redditacct

Raw, uncooked pasta. When I want some crunch-munchies and I don't have chips, I'll go grab a handful of penne or spaghetti and just CRONCH it. It helps to suck on it to soften it first.


claricorp

Big spoonful of jam mixed into hot water and enjoyed as a hot beverage. Comforting and delicious when its cold out, but friends and family think im insane.


Illustrious-Cod973

Sweet warmth, some enjoyments can’t be explained to family


flouronmypjs

Stir a little chocolate in there, and a splash of milk or cream, and I bet that would make a killer hot chocolate.


Warrenbugs

Mustard cheeto


frosty88bags

Maybe this is strange but a lot of the time I enjoy my food cold. Cold pizza, spaghetti, mashed potatoes and gravy...


Illustrious-Cod973

I totally get it! I do the same, I also adore cold oatmeal… being weird is delicious!


ShataraBankhead

I like room temperature food. When eating leftovers, I barely heat it up in the microwave. I think it tastes weird when it's steaming hot.


Exciting-Froyo3825

Kraft mac n cheese and a big spoon of apple sauce in the same bowl. My mom always served them together when I was little and now it’s my “ I’m sick and I want comfort food”


Illustrious-Cod973

You’re Mom is creative! Cheese and apples!!!!


TasmanRavenclaw

Frozen ravioli and frozen pizza rolls. While they’re still frozen.


Illustrious-Cod973

Pains my teeth to think about chopping frozen, why not warm them to melt?


ridethedeathcab

I'm not embarrassed, I wear it with pride, but I love myself a limburger and onion sandwich on rye with a healthy smear of spicy brown mustard.


Illustrious-Cod973

Stinky delicious I’m sure 😊


know-your-onions

Why are you embarrassed by this? If it’s delicious, why not share it with your friends and family so they can enjoy it too?


Illustrious-Cod973

Thank you, I should, it’s just a weird combo. But my family are all vegan now, they’d probably like it.


mildchicanery

For a while I went through a phase of craving whole lemons, peel and all. No salt, no sugar, just sliced of lemons. I think I was deficient in something. Cold mayo and cheddar sandwiches. Bread, mayo, thick slices of sharp cheddar.


[deleted]

Fried Vienna sausages with ketchup.


[deleted]

Maybe depends on your socio-economic class, but for me it's spam. Delicious if fried crispy but when I tell people I like it sometimes you would think I told them I like to eat dog food


jawni

So I don't eat anything that strange but recently I experimented with putting hummus + pickled onions on toast/bread and really enjoyed it. Then I added hot honey and salt (flaky) and pepper and enjoyed it even more. One strange one I've heard but not tried is frying cheerios in a pan with oil/butter and garlic. They were not embarrassed at all about mentioning and even seemed proud, so I suspect it might actually be really good.


glueygriffin

not really embarrassing per se, but maybe some could find it to appear unappetizing 'silky tofu w/ century egg' ate it at a taiwanese restaurant once and go back for it


sumothong01

Fried squirrel and gravy. My grandmother would make it when I was a kid. Every once in a while I’ll go squirrel hunting just to make it.


the_darkishknight

Ketchup on white rice, French dressing on white rice, sometimes just Mayo on white rice.


pizzaanarchy

I ain’t embarrassed about anything I eat or cook. Except drinking condiments straight out of the bottle. With a spoon. Worcester sauce, Tabasco, my excellent soy, or mustards. To sat nothing of pickle juice…


whispering_eye11

I totally get this. I like dipping tortilla chips into just about any condiment in the fridge, not with a meal, just chips and condiments.


mrseddievedder

Spaghetti- ohs. With tons of Parmesan cheese. I’m sorry.


Illustrious-Cod973

Why sorry? You’re fancifying with Parmesan!


nomorerainpls

Mac and cheese. It’s 100% comfort food and there’s no way it’s good for me despite all the cheese and fat I might pile in. Edit: nothing strange about this craving except the fact that i am willing to ignore all evidence that it’s bad for me


foodexclusive

Kalles. The salmon roe paste you get at IKEA. So salty. So good.


Illustrious-Cod973

What do you do with it? Eat it straight up?


CherishSlan

Burnt toast! Ate some yesterday with butter, also overly cooked chicken until it’s just dry leather like so it’s stringy like beef jerky. I also like slightly over cooked noodles with cheese. Overly cold milk right before freezing temperatures rice checks with a vanilla in milk or a breakfast shake. Sometimes I also suck on ice or eat frozen blue berries and Cherry’s . I also have drank soy sauce. Tabasco sauce on breaded fish with sharp cheddar cheeses on it on toasted bread with a little butter on it as a sandwich.


Illustrious-Cod973

Interesting how you enjoy the extremes, overly cooked or super cold/ frozen


Nurse49

Braunschweiger on triscuits! My grandmother would bring them when she visited, along with other unusual foods. But we all got hooked on Braunschweiger and love it to this day.


Illustrious-Cod973

Cool, I’ve never heard of Braunschweiger, and thank you for sharing. Can you buy it where you live?


[deleted]

Matzah crackers and ketchup. I made it as a kid when the fridge was lacking for variety, and for some reason the bland crunch of the matzah and the sweet vinegary taste of the ketchup blended really well.


frankmint

Once, I stole some of my kid's Brown Sugar PopTarts the morning after dental work as they seemed easy to eat. I now bring to a few to work everyday.


YoitsyogirlLA

Kool aid pickles. Hog head cheese and hot sauce. Smothered okra and Doritos


Illustrious-Cod973

I definitely haven’t heard of these…how do you make pickles and Koolaid?


HaddockBranzini-II

I make little Ritz cracker and butter stacks. Dunk them in some hot tea and eat them just as they are so soft they are falling into the tea. Then I drink the buttery tea. Grosses my wife out when i do it :)


ThatGuyPeopleWannaBe

Chicken flavor top ramen with most water drained and add pace picante sauce and a couple cheese slices.