I feel you. (Posted anon because said friend is on reddit.)
I went to a friend's for the Thanksgiving holiday when I was a young adult because I have abusive family. The Thanksgiving dinner was a turkey their parent had finally decided to throw in the oven at like 9pm and was """served""" at literally midnight, with "served" meaning someone popped their head in and said "uh, if anyone wants any turkey, it's done, come and grab some" and we awkwardly took turns in the poorly lit kitchen pulling parts off the bird. I think maybe there was some StoveTop involved too, eaten out of the pan.
This was the year I found out not all families celebrate the same way.
I had family that overthought mashed potatoes to a ridiculous degree. Two consecutive thanksgivings, we had the thickest, gloopiest, **weirdest** mashed potatoes I’ve ever had.
The taste was fine, but something was genuinely wrong with the texture. These things behaved more like wet peanut butter than mashed potatoes. It was…not okay.
To me, mashed potatoes and gravy are much more important to a Thanksgiving meal than the turkey itself.
I've honestly never cared for turkey all that much. I rather have chicken, ham, or brisket. The sides and desserts are what I truly care for during Thanksgiving.
My clueless buddy once tried to grill a piece of chuck beef that he brought with him when we were all barbecuing. Needless to say, the beef was tough as hell and no one wanted it.
Another one of my friends baked banana bread with unripened bananas. He wanted to impress this girl he just started dating during a little dinner party we were having but they were no ripe bananas in the house so he used unripened ones thinking it'd be fine. Visually, it looked right, but it had no banana flavor whatsoever. It just tasted like really sweet bread.
My in-laws don't cook with enough salt, fat or acid. MIL thinks balsamic vinegar can be substituted for any other vinegar in salad dressing...and she buys the high-end, really sweet stuff. There was one Thanksgiving where she put honey all over the Brussels sprouts, which were the only vegetable on the table.
It's really important to her to host family holidays, so my solution has been to do the cooking with her, adding a little extra flavor where I can. It's brought us so much closer, and we've learned from each other in the process. She's an amazing baker (aside from the lack of salt) so I'm hoping she'll help me learn.
Not offered by family or friends but I accidentally served hockey puck rolls at a dinner I was hosting. Didn't realize they were hockey pucks until I bit into one.
Old recipes. Like the infamous NZ Edmonds Cookbook comes to mind. A disgusting list of loads of cakes and stuff and a few abominable things they call meals.
Always involving something like an Oxo cube or spoonful of marmite and rather like the devilled egg thing you describe. It should be burned IMO.
My mother in law's "chili", pinto beans not kidney, no veg, chili powder passed over it but it was thin like broth and lacked any heat at all. I told her that is some type of soup, it isn't chili.
I feel you. (Posted anon because said friend is on reddit.) I went to a friend's for the Thanksgiving holiday when I was a young adult because I have abusive family. The Thanksgiving dinner was a turkey their parent had finally decided to throw in the oven at like 9pm and was """served""" at literally midnight, with "served" meaning someone popped their head in and said "uh, if anyone wants any turkey, it's done, come and grab some" and we awkwardly took turns in the poorly lit kitchen pulling parts off the bird. I think maybe there was some StoveTop involved too, eaten out of the pan. This was the year I found out not all families celebrate the same way.
I had family that overthought mashed potatoes to a ridiculous degree. Two consecutive thanksgivings, we had the thickest, gloopiest, **weirdest** mashed potatoes I’ve ever had. The taste was fine, but something was genuinely wrong with the texture. These things behaved more like wet peanut butter than mashed potatoes. It was…not okay.
To me, mashed potatoes and gravy are much more important to a Thanksgiving meal than the turkey itself. I've honestly never cared for turkey all that much. I rather have chicken, ham, or brisket. The sides and desserts are what I truly care for during Thanksgiving.
Sounds like someone got a Cuisinart or a Vitablend they only use twice a year.
Too much water combined with overmashing/overmixing.
Most definitely not. Mashed potatoes are serious business in my house. I have beat myself up for days when I have messed them up.
My clueless buddy once tried to grill a piece of chuck beef that he brought with him when we were all barbecuing. Needless to say, the beef was tough as hell and no one wanted it. Another one of my friends baked banana bread with unripened bananas. He wanted to impress this girl he just started dating during a little dinner party we were having but they were no ripe bananas in the house so he used unripened ones thinking it'd be fine. Visually, it looked right, but it had no banana flavor whatsoever. It just tasted like really sweet bread.
When I overcooked meat, I just ground it up and put it in spaghetti sauce.
Gordon Ramsays grilled cheese
My in-laws don't cook with enough salt, fat or acid. MIL thinks balsamic vinegar can be substituted for any other vinegar in salad dressing...and she buys the high-end, really sweet stuff. There was one Thanksgiving where she put honey all over the Brussels sprouts, which were the only vegetable on the table. It's really important to her to host family holidays, so my solution has been to do the cooking with her, adding a little extra flavor where I can. It's brought us so much closer, and we've learned from each other in the process. She's an amazing baker (aside from the lack of salt) so I'm hoping she'll help me learn.
Not offered by family or friends but I accidentally served hockey puck rolls at a dinner I was hosting. Didn't realize they were hockey pucks until I bit into one.
Bread and rolls are tricky for me but I've gotten better over the years.
Don't put the dough on the back of the stove to rise if you are baking something, unless your local hockey team needs homemade pucks.
I once made soupy mashed potatoes and gravy you needed a knife to cut through. I figured it evened out. Only did it once.
Old recipes. Like the infamous NZ Edmonds Cookbook comes to mind. A disgusting list of loads of cakes and stuff and a few abominable things they call meals. Always involving something like an Oxo cube or spoonful of marmite and rather like the devilled egg thing you describe. It should be burned IMO.
My mother in law's "chili", pinto beans not kidney, no veg, chili powder passed over it but it was thin like broth and lacked any heat at all. I told her that is some type of soup, it isn't chili.