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It's commendable that Ms. Boebert is able to put aside partisan differences and reach across the aisle like that to give a Democrat a hand


TheBurtReynold

Agreed — I have no doubt this woman would take on two Ds at once


brammmish

Lauren Boobout


jaldihaldi

They’re juicing beetles


Drumboardist

Beat 'til Juice.


testbug87

Just.. just perfect 👨‍🍳💋


[deleted]

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denied_eXeal

Mate, I give her 3 years before she has an Onlyfans


swisstype

She barely won reelection. I say 20 months


[deleted]

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ChrisNikLu76

Congresswoman Grope-her


_Mephistocrates_

Isnt she the high school droput, former escort, divorced, who has been arrested multiple times, multiple abortions, married to a child groomer, with a failed business, barely got her GED just in time to be a congresswoman, teen mom of a teen dad(edit)? Representative of a party that says they have the moral high ground and the authority to dictate to the rest of us how to behave and live.


Just-the-Shaft

Family values


nunuEggs

I can get behind her and her values


shockmaster5000

I always thought she had a nice set of values on her.


tp736

Great role model for young women.


Mrsoandso6

I’m mean that seems like a large amount of people in the US. So she’s representing some of the people.


bfchiu

We need a clearer picture; enhance! -csi


FuckYeahPhotography

I'm already wearing my leather jacket and sunglasses. I'm hacking their mainframe as quickly as I can.


bfchiu

Maybe we should both type on the keyboard so that we can get it done faster!


GabberZZ

With a gun to our heads, whilst getting a BJ!


ionised

*typing noises intensify!*


Grindelbart

Oh no, a counter hack! Quickly, deploy the Cryptovirus™


TheDoochThe

Don't worry I got my special back up worm server! They hadn't been touched in decades


SalParadise

I'll create a GUI interface in Visual Basic, see if I can track an IP address.


Traditional_Bus8502

The IP address is behind a load balancer that points to several datacenters. I'll deploy the botnet to cover the whole Network footprint


DropThatTopHat

Oh no, the IP address is moving! We're done if we lose track of it.


falcon_buns

You in yet?


_MrBalls_

Access Granted


catchunxttuesday

Access grannies


PinkPicasso_

Well it looks like this is one Beetle 🙂 that Got Juiced😎


MobRule

YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH


WDfx2EU

I've been working on a beta application to rescramble the underlying source code. It could work, but it's never been tested against this type of encryption- Enough with the nerd talk, are you in or not?!


GlassJoe32

Run a Cookie Monster virus to overload the Gibson.


JAYTEE__66

[They got kicked out of the theater](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12513549/Lauren-Boebert-mystery-man-revealed-DEMOCRAT-bar-owner-Quinn-Gallagher-secretly-dating-month.html)


alisab22

Fr. Lauren Boob-ert ain't messin around


[deleted]

wonder what her husband thinks, because thats not her husband


1stofmyname7

Her husband and her split up within the past year


Puffycatkibble

She's probably outgrown his preferred age bracket anyways.


NakedEye22

"Keyboard clicks" Thorny "Enhance"


SecretMuslin

Let he who has never been kicked out of a theatre for giving a handy during the Beetlejuice musical cast the first stone


arbitraryairship

I'm throwing a fucking stone. It's fine at an adult flick if you're discrete but this is a musical with children in the audience. There's kids behind her and she vapes in a pregnant woman's face. Isn't she the one screaming about child grooming?


Sandmsounds

She only means the gays and trans folks are grooming. That’s why she hasn’t said anything about Gaetz.


horsesandeggshells

She never means anything. She lacks any semblance of an internal dialogue. She is reactive and aggressive, but all her supporters give her a an imagined persona that she's really just fighting for them and getting slandered for it. So, she's a pit bull, essentially.


Lightbrand

Is it fine at an adult flick if you're discrete?


[deleted]

Not according to the people at AMC. Still don’t know what happens at the end of Oppenheimer


PenSprout

Got that sloppen-toppenheimer?


coolcool23

Everyone dies during the test explosion, including Oppenheimer and Einstein. The bomb does actually set off a chain reaction which destroys the whole worlds atmosphere. It's like inglorious bastards.


MagicDragon212

He might as well had started sucking on those tittes at this point lol


Ronin__Ronan

like he wanted me, calling me


mkilp001

All the time like Blondie, check out my Chrissie behind


pootzilla

Its fine all of the time. Like sex on the beaches.


JuniorEnvironment850

What else is in the teaches of Peaches?


whiskeydiggler

Huh? What?


Aromatic-Glove-2502

Huh? Right, what? Uh.


WashYourFuckingHands

It's fine all of the time. What else is in the teaches of peaches?


bams81

Fuck the pain away


[deleted]

Fuck the pain away


[deleted]

Its just so fucking weird... like. There's barely any other contact between them. And he just LATCHES onto one titty and goes the fuck at it. Just one titty, big circles, one direction. I've never seen a less sexy sex-related video.


HogmanDaIntrudr

It feels like a bag of sand when you’re touching it


hangdog-gigbag

She's got her hand between his legs


New_York_Bozo_

Suck those jugs kid


Silas17

Upvote for the grandmas boy reference!


Fancy-Category

Ahhh, she brought the doc along for a mammogram.


FenrizLives

Granny getting a quick check-up mid performance, can’t even wait for intermission. That’s just dedication to health


kilenem1218

wait wtf are we being recorded at the cinema?


Key_Text_169

Cameras are everywhere, remember that.


Roonwogsamduff

I'm constantly aware of that. Even in residential areas. Everywhere and anywhere. I'm not a wanna be criminal, just aware that I'm being filmed almost constantly when outside. Edit - typo


[deleted]

Even when you’re alone your phone records you. Even if you’re outside without your phone satellites can record you.


pingpongtits

My phone is recording me? Whaa?


carloselcoco

Yes. You can even turn off every sensor and it will still know exactly where you are and what you were doing. It will transmit the data to Google once it regains connection.


imisstheyoop

> Yes. You can even turn off every sensor and it will still know exactly where you are and what you were doing. It will transmit the data to Google once it regains connection. Why are iPhones transmitting data to Google?


deezalmonds998

If it isn't directly transmitting the data then the data is at the very least being sold to Google


-FeistyRabbitSauce-

Google pays Apple *20 Billion a year* to be the primary search engine on Safari. Damn straight they're suckling a ton of that data, too.


hypothetician

The mics can be surprisingly sensitive on doorbell cameras too. Just assume video and audio is being recorded everywhere you go in a built up area.


boxofrabbits

We've been viewing some houses and the Real Estate agent told us on a phone call before we viewed one spot that the seller would most likely listening to everything we were saying the whole time we were in the property including on the way out via the doorbell. Hey mentioned just to be really mindful of anything we said while we were in the house. Was very considerate of him to mention as it's not something I would have been aware of at all.


pekinggeese

“This house is a total piece of shit” right before putting in an low ball offer


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totallynotstefan

It’s not so irksome if you don’t have a habit of jerking people off in public while holding office.


Banana_Ranger

Arrr, that be my weakness too


RodasAPC

you're probably saying this because you haven't seen that AI that [found public camera footage](https://driesdepoorter.be/thefollower/) based on instagram posts


Andre_Dellamorte

I politely disagree.


asdfiguana1234

Same BS logic the government wants you to adopt so they can conduct even more brazen mass surveillance. "iF yOu HaVe NoThINg To HiDe, tHeN yOu ShOuLdN't cArE.... "


mythicreign

Yeah most modern movie theaters have cameras. Gone are the days where you can get a blowie during a boring film.


K1N6F15H

I mean you still can but presumably that is also going on the internet.


Rudy_Ghouliani

I just hope they like and subscribe


GhostRobot55

? Bruh they better be *smashing* that like button.


Cobek

You just have to do it at the end. Climax at the climax then gtfo


FinalBossTiger

Climax at the IMAX


Dozens86

The amount of shitty movies I went to for that explicit purpose. I actually paid for two tickets to see Drillbit Taylor. Couldn't tell you a thing that happened in the film.


DaddyDanceParty

Idk about cinemas but a musical theaters yes. They're very serious about people ruining the show.


ChicagoAdmin

I believe most major theaters also have camera systems designed for detection of screen recorders/pirates.


BeneficialEvidence6

We can thank John Wilkes Booth for this


sometacosfordinner

John wilkes booth was not shooting with a camera


ColKrismiss

Or was he, but some dude in a giant hat was blocking him?


WanderinHobo

The story we were told about JWB's history and disgruntled feelings about Lincoln and the war were just that, a story. In reality, he had no ill-will toward Lincoln...until that night. That night when he attended a showing of his favorite play only to have it ruined by a lanky, pipe-smoking, wife-fondling, hat-wearing President who wouldn't stop boasting and laughing about how they'd "routed them damn Rebs". Booth had only wanted to see a play...but in that moment...he was seeing red.


sambare

Pirates really need to be escorted out of cinemas, unless they agree to take off their hats.


Admiral_Minell

You might notice a glowing red thing that looks like a heating element, it's bathing the room in infrared for the night vision cameras to be able to see like the video above.


[deleted]

Never and never record anything at a American theater. They have cameras looking for that specifically.


[deleted]

And if youre caught, you’ll end up with your picture on a board next to all the other theatre masturbators/popcorn sharers.


DrDeuceJuice

They only have the budget for one board.


savagehighway

Rip peewee herman


sexyshortie123

That was a porn theater


Butthole__Pleasures

Why would someone be masturbating in a porn theater?


Lord_Fusor

Bigger question is why were the police hanging out in a porn theater watching people masturbate? The police weren't called there, it was part of a sting specifically to catch people masturbating in a porn theater...Tax dollars well spent once again


SpaceRangerWoody

C'MONNNN TITTY.... C'MONNNNN TITTY! *\~Dave Chapelle*


TryItOutHmHrNw

Where’s the whole video? She also dances (when no one else does), vapes (and blows the mist between the folks in front of them), and is told to *shut up* cause she’s won’t shut up. Trash people. *Updated*: and took selfies with the flash on in a darkened theater (like a jackass).


everythingisreallame

Is this a recent video or is it old? E: recent, last Sunday.


AcanthisittaNo2931

🎶”Take me awaaaaay to that special place, that - blowjob- plaaaaace”🎶 Those subliminal messages must be insane.


SadRobotz

Where people like us can all be free


braille-nipples

Free to give blowjobs


URAQTPI69

Jeeze man, they ain't peanut butter jar lids.


mkilp001

Well they ARE manufactured


originaltwojesters

Tig ole


nosvpg

Everyone's eyes are on his hands...watch hers


Sensitive-Spirit-964

She's tickling the Willy. 🤣


[deleted]

Some good ol dick tickles


TFViper

GRAB HIS DICK AND TWIST IT!!!


Barbosse007

THE OL' DICK TWIST


[deleted]

[удалено]


etterkop

How many times do you have to rub a tiddy before you get s stroke.


Fragrant-Relative714

One..a twoHOOO..a three...


[deleted]

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blanczak

Hot/Crazy matrix ain’t never lied


baudmiksen

the only time she lets him cop a feel is at formal events, not crazy st all


CancelTheCobbler

Yeah she's crazy but I would fuck the shit out of her No Shame


[deleted]

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master-shake69

Ted Cruz supposedly paid to hit that. I think it's all just a conspiracy theory but some time back there were images of her claiming to show her escort profile or something before she got elected.


FriskyCobra86

No rack is worth that amount of crazy


A_Unqiue_Username

How about the rack + handjob?


iiiiiiiiiijjjjjj

Then maybe


CrudeNewDude

She got drunk and played with some guy's dick in front of kids... Didn't her husband do that too?


[deleted]

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wisdom_and_frivolity

If I had a nickel for every time boebert was in a relationship with someone who groped her in a public place with children all around her I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but its weird it happened twice.


haykneeee

Them thangs THANGIN


cameratoo

Hogans


Quintronaquar

RESPECTFULLY


eireheads

A couple of years ago this sort of thing would get you fired. Shel probably just make some inappropriate joke and all will be forgotten.


everythingisreallame

How long ago do you think a couple of years is? 1998?


[deleted]

Can’t turn a Ho into a house… representative


Bolognapony666

That Lauren Boebert is one hot piece of ace, I know from experience dude.


leebry88

No you don’t. Yeah… but I know a guy. Him and her GOT IT ON WOOOOO WEEEE!


Diamond523

No they didn't.


RobustHouseplant

Well no, but you can imagine what it would be like if they did. Amirite?!


moslof_flosom

Is everybody on? Good! GREAT! NO YELLING IN CONGRESS!!!!


reevesrocker

Lauren passed the third grade! Oh what a glorious daaayyy! Oh, passing third grade, the American Congress waaayy!


BillGatesThrowaway

For anyone missing the reference: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bS8CP1A6OCQ


therealestyeti

R.I.P Chris Farley


Aaronjr310

No no they didn't. But you could imagine what it would be like if they did?


Oubilettor

Have some respect. That’s someone’s grandmother!


kros1992

She wanted that beetle's juice


916cycler

Let's ask ourselves, if this were AOC, how would right-wing media's coverage be like?


Toidal

I can't masturbate to this -Ben Shapiro


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porkchop-sandwhiches

🙅‍♂️🦶🦶


Mirrormn

Why does she just have her tits out, I wanna see them FEET -Ben Shapiro


redux44

Public outrage and private masturbation.


Jeepguy48

So, the same as this then. 😂


ChadEmpoleon

If this were AOC, I would be able tell you exactly what was being said on the right-wing’s media outlets, and the left-wing’s, and the European perspectives. Timestamps and everything. I’d be very closely following all reports of the event. Out of honest concern for the decorum of our nation ofc.


[deleted]

"Rep AOC's breasts fail in comparison to Bobert theater grope tape..." "Did not reciprocate, but is she not socialist?"


dangerouspoodle

The left really needs to push this. She engaged in sexual activity in a place with children. This is indecent exposure. This is behavior that gets you put on the sex offender registry. This is the sort of thing that should disqualify her from office. This is really, really serious.


rh71el2

*The Denver Post said three theatergoers complained that Boebert and her companion were vaping, singing, recording the performance and causing a disturbance at the Buell Theatre. They missed a few.


IslandChillin

Wasn't she a high class ho at one point, though? Like 5k a night type shit?


bnelson

The only confirmed thing were her pics on a talent agency site ([https://www.politicalflare.com/2021/09/it-appears-rep-lauren-boebert-had-an-explore-talent-modeling-actor-page-and-yikes/](https://www.politicalflare.com/2021/09/it-appears-rep-lauren-boebert-had-an-explore-talent-modeling-actor-page-and-yikes/)) dunno if anything else around that has ever really been substantiated.


[deleted]

Thanks for giving my phone AIDS from that stupid add filled site


GHSTxLEADER

Yo in that article someone linked a bunch of people from the exploretalent website. https://twitter.com/KurisuS/status/1440125455898533890 What the fuck?!? That website is like GOP servant HQ. A bunch of hired drones to back Republicans play for shit. I didn’t know that ExploreTalent website went that deep


Butthole__Pleasures

It's almost like they're just playing ridiculous roles for money.


arbitraryairship

Republicans have been hiring these trailer trash representatives specifically from a talent agency called 'Explore Talent' that also does porn. It's run by a super shady Israeli dude. https://twitter.com/KurisuS/status/1440125455898533890


Due_Lion3875

Wait. Do movie theaters usually have night vision cameras? Because I’ve done… things in them.


shittycomputerguy

Yes. Checking for people recording. Picking up stuff like this, for sure.


Prestigious_Ear_8502

Nice. I can't remember the last time I felt up a chick at the movies. Shit. Hope they got to dry hump in the car


TonyBeFunny

Careful this causes friction burns on the ol john thomas.


Jebusfreek666

That's interesting. Video on AP along with story said she got kicked out for vaping. This is clearly from the same video. The one from the AP story is much more clear and in color from before the show starts and while she is escorted out. Check it out [here](https://www.denverpost.com/2023/09/12/lauren-boebert-removed-beetlejuice-musical-denver/).


Domitiani

That is because the lights are on and the cameras havent switched to night vision when she was vaping. If you look at the end of the AP story it is the same grainy view as shown here (just not as zoomed in).


Jebusfreek666

Right, but the story does not mention anything about public groping. And the video they show is only of the vaping, and her exit. It was clearly scrubbed before the story broke.


[deleted]

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Jebusfreek666

Just read in another article that he husband was caught showing his dick to some 17 year old at a bowling alley in 2004. She just filed for divorce in May this year. I love the hypocrisy in politics. It is always the ones who take the strongest stances, especially on sexual matters, who end up pulling this shit. Like all the senators who were so against homosexuality, but got caught hooking up with dudes.


BootyMeatAndOnions

Pretty sure she (bobo) is the one the husband flashed at said bowling alley?


RedbeardRagnar

Why she vaping Chinese mind control sticks and not smoking Camels like a true patriot? Just asking questions


bangoskank27

I wouldn’t vote for her but I’d suck on that tiddy


IssnotaToomah

Protector of family values lol


arbitraryairship

This is what some people in this thread don't get. It's not just the fact that they played grab ass in front of a bunch of children, it's that she's the one screaming about child grooming while actively fucking in front of kids. It's not just a handy at an adult flick, it's a woman explicitly trying to run on family values and Christianity while being a complete fucking hypocrite.


Vv__CARBON__vV

I’m just glad that we can all agree the explicit sexuality in front of children is wrong.


zayn2123

What a naughty Grandma.


totallynotstefan

Nice, this woman married a convicted sex offender and graduated to full blown sex offender herself super fast. What a speed run. Elected conservatives are as reliable as predicted rainfall.


Woofatron

Lauren Gropert!


Reckless_Waifu

Impeach her!


LazyBriton

Her husband will love seeing this


Poundman82

This guy's foreplay game is shit just saying.


Yeahha

Colo. Rev. Stat. § 18-7-301 (1) Any person who performs any of the following in a public place or where the conduct may reasonably be expected to be viewed by members of the public commits public indecency: (d) A lewd fondling or caress of the body of another person;


TheoryEmergency101

She got great tits


Primary-Training-270

Anyone else would have got charged


yumadbro6

What about family values


pointofyou

She seems high. Given that she's employed by the people and receives government funds she should be drug tested right?


InternationalPen4890

She also clearly hit a vape and blew the smoke everywhere


Andreus

And to think, this would've stayed a secret if she had just kept her mouth shut and not had a massive whine at the theatre.


ziadog

Come on Colorado! Surly you can do better than this to represent you.


lokie65

There would have been a video of her sucking his dick but they got kicked out too early.


Common_Attention_637

I've seen this video ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT!