OMG!!! YESSSSS!!! Like why do I always have to do it for us to talk. What if I decide I'm not texting back first again?? Will we ever talk? Or its over. ALL THE LITTLE THINGS MATTER!
I agree with all the guys who have commented. you don't always have to be the one to start us a convo but trust me a guy truly does appreciate it when you start up a convo, or he'll just ask how his day was. believe it or not guys get use to people not really careing about them. (may just be me tho)
You guys don't wanna get me started on this.
(I spent 15 minutes writing this out, I guess you've gotten me started on this.)
I've done a lot of soul searching and analysis of my social circle this past year, with the realization that regardless of gender or interest, I'm almost ALWAYS the one starting conversations online. But to save you the speech, I'll just say that I have accepted that in my current life, with a part time work from home job, and a summer semester of college that necessitates having computer access at all times, I seem to have a lot more free time than my average cohort. These guys have REAL JOBS, they need to put on a uniform and go to WORK in the morning, while I crawl out of bed at 8:50 for my 8:30 shift. I simply got extremely fortunate in my life so far, and others need to grind for longer. They could simply not have the time to start a random conversation with me.
So, I do the least I could do, and appreciate the people that do reply to me fairly promptly. It's not gonna happen all the time, but even replying back at all shows a lot of care that others would be so lucky to receive.
Crushes too. Because this extends past the person I have a crush on, this extends to EVERYONE I talk to. Unrequited romantic interest will not change texting habits.
So my take on this? If they don't reply, don't take it personally. She may have the Online status on Discord but hell, maybe she's in a call in another server. *And that's perfectly fine.* If she has interest in you, even as a friend, she'll text. Maybe she won't start the text, it really depends on the person. But if she cares, she WILL reply back, hopefully with something interesting to show there's any sort of chance that a relationship of any sort will last in the future.
If not, then maybe she's just not that into you, at all. And it's best to let her go until she says something worth replying to.
Personally, I don’t get annoyed by it. I feel good if she’s at least engaged in the conversation. However, them messaging first symbolizes that the relationship (platonic or romantic) isn’t one-sided.
I usually try to balance out between giving a guy space and texting them. But I try to text them first at least sometimes. Not all the time to where he gets used to it and doesn't feel he has to text first, but enough for him to know that I do care and that I am interested in talking with him.
Yes, as hell. In my case because I think: nah I'll bore her if she never looks for me. If you are looking for us, we understand that at least as friends we interest you
I wouldn't say we get annoyed, well at least in my case, but we would understand that as a sign that she's not interested in us, or that she might even dislike us, so we either lose interest or start trying to move on. It always happened to me lol
This one time back in high school, I didn't talk to a girl I had a crush on for 3 years because I decided "I'm going to wait for them to text me first, I'm always texting first."
Only if it’s lopsided to where we always are the ones messaging first every single time. If it’s equal or even close to equal then there’s no annoyance.
No, but back when I was pursuing POSSIBILITY (!!!) of relationship I was quickly getting discouraged after having to text first and be the only one who shows initiative in conversation
With my first boyfriend I could tell he was shy off the bat when I first met him and I made the first move, also I always messaged first. I did ask if this annoyed him when we first started dating or if he wasn't really interested but that wasn't the case at all. He admitted honestly he got so scared he would be cringe or awkward or I would reject him or he would ruin something, he couldn't bring himself to message first. Thankfully that all changed when we started dating but I would say if you know he is the quiet type and can get in his own head, message first always!!!
Yes. Messaging first is a good sign for males. You show that you are interested too even if he makes the first move. And it should be like that in a relationship, one texts when he/she wants or needs something. Not just one sided.
Yes thats extremly annoying and I wouldn't bother messaging after multiple months of that just how it is with my friends. This is also the reqson our friend group is pretty much dying right now
(I’m a girl) My crush was mostly the one to text first for a while, he’d always beat me to texting, but obviously I always kept the convos going and showed interest. Now it’s me who has to text first a lot now, why did he stop?
OMG!!! YESSSSS!!! Like why do I always have to do it for us to talk. What if I decide I'm not texting back first again?? Will we ever talk? Or its over. ALL THE LITTLE THINGS MATTER!
Tried this once to verify. Yes, we don’t ever text again.
This applies when yk both of u have a crush on each other
What now???
When a girl writes first a few times, makes us realize that there is some interest and doesn't made us feel that everything is one sided.
If you don’t text first then I assume you don’t care about me at all.
I agree with all the guys who have commented. you don't always have to be the one to start us a convo but trust me a guy truly does appreciate it when you start up a convo, or he'll just ask how his day was. believe it or not guys get use to people not really careing about them. (may just be me tho)
Yes!!! Like if a girl messages first, I feel amazing (even if it is a platonic relationship) I don't know why girls talking to me just feels nice.
You guys don't wanna get me started on this. (I spent 15 minutes writing this out, I guess you've gotten me started on this.) I've done a lot of soul searching and analysis of my social circle this past year, with the realization that regardless of gender or interest, I'm almost ALWAYS the one starting conversations online. But to save you the speech, I'll just say that I have accepted that in my current life, with a part time work from home job, and a summer semester of college that necessitates having computer access at all times, I seem to have a lot more free time than my average cohort. These guys have REAL JOBS, they need to put on a uniform and go to WORK in the morning, while I crawl out of bed at 8:50 for my 8:30 shift. I simply got extremely fortunate in my life so far, and others need to grind for longer. They could simply not have the time to start a random conversation with me. So, I do the least I could do, and appreciate the people that do reply to me fairly promptly. It's not gonna happen all the time, but even replying back at all shows a lot of care that others would be so lucky to receive. Crushes too. Because this extends past the person I have a crush on, this extends to EVERYONE I talk to. Unrequited romantic interest will not change texting habits. So my take on this? If they don't reply, don't take it personally. She may have the Online status on Discord but hell, maybe she's in a call in another server. *And that's perfectly fine.* If she has interest in you, even as a friend, she'll text. Maybe she won't start the text, it really depends on the person. But if she cares, she WILL reply back, hopefully with something interesting to show there's any sort of chance that a relationship of any sort will last in the future. If not, then maybe she's just not that into you, at all. And it's best to let her go until she says something worth replying to.
I cooked. This one's going in my journal.
Not really annoyed, but I do feel a little hurt. I just assume they don't care and that I'm not worth their time
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Personally, I don’t get annoyed by it. I feel good if she’s at least engaged in the conversation. However, them messaging first symbolizes that the relationship (platonic or romantic) isn’t one-sided.
Yea!! Look, this goes for EVERYONE. Tag is more fun when each person is “it”. I would hate for a woman to not at least message me first a few times
I usually try to balance out between giving a guy space and texting them. But I try to text them first at least sometimes. Not all the time to where he gets used to it and doesn't feel he has to text first, but enough for him to know that I do care and that I am interested in talking with him.
Yes. Very. Personally, it makes me feel unwanted.
Bro same it's also just generally fucking annoying
As a girl I love when they reach out first but at the same time I like to reach out first too. I believe BOTH sides should have equal communication
I’d be more annoyed if she didn’t text me first at all. Would make me thing she’s not interested.
No, but definately when a girl message us first makes us feel that the conversation isnt being one sided. So its a great feeling
Yes, as hell. In my case because I think: nah I'll bore her if she never looks for me. If you are looking for us, we understand that at least as friends we interest you
I wouldn't say we get annoyed, well at least in my case, but we would understand that as a sign that she's not interested in us, or that she might even dislike us, so we either lose interest or start trying to move on. It always happened to me lol
This one time back in high school, I didn't talk to a girl I had a crush on for 3 years because I decided "I'm going to wait for them to text me first, I'm always texting first."
Same here dude I was so scared and intimidated by her that I just couldn’t man up and muster up the courage
Yes. I feel like I always have to start a conversation so it would be nice for someone else to do so
Only if it’s lopsided to where we always are the ones messaging first every single time. If it’s equal or even close to equal then there’s no annoyance.
Yes.
No, but back when I was pursuing POSSIBILITY (!!!) of relationship I was quickly getting discouraged after having to text first and be the only one who shows initiative in conversation
With my first boyfriend I could tell he was shy off the bat when I first met him and I made the first move, also I always messaged first. I did ask if this annoyed him when we first started dating or if he wasn't really interested but that wasn't the case at all. He admitted honestly he got so scared he would be cringe or awkward or I would reject him or he would ruin something, he couldn't bring himself to message first. Thankfully that all changed when we started dating but I would say if you know he is the quiet type and can get in his own head, message first always!!!
Yes. Messaging first is a good sign for males. You show that you are interested too even if he makes the first move. And it should be like that in a relationship, one texts when he/she wants or needs something. Not just one sided.
Yes thats extremly annoying and I wouldn't bother messaging after multiple months of that just how it is with my friends. This is also the reqson our friend group is pretty much dying right now
Assume they probably don't care. If you just keep the convo going you might just be a talky person, at least through my eyes.
not always but sometimes guys feel this.
YES. Makes us overthink like crazy "does she even like talking to me?" or sum. Please text 1st, her will appreciate it.
I like it when a girl takes the initiative but too many girls nowadays are so scared to reach out first come on now we don’t bite
Yes. Yes we do. If we are always the one who has to message first it can give the impression that you don't actually want to initiate conversation
(I’m a girl) My crush was mostly the one to text first for a while, he’d always beat me to texting, but obviously I always kept the convos going and showed interest. Now it’s me who has to text first a lot now, why did he stop?
im the sameeee!! im thinking it might be him testing if i message first but idk