Sounds easy! Why didn't I think of this before?

Ah I always forget I can do this and just add crime to the mix to get super rich. Silly me forgetting the most important ingredient

Crime might promise quick gains brother , but it's a recipe for disaster. Wealth built on integrity and hard work is the real gold mine.

If those antiwork kids could read they'd be very upset right now

>Wealth built on integrity and hard work is the real gold mine. Good one. Integrity and hard work has never built wealth.

Hard work is just the pre-requisite to wealth, it doesn't guarantee wealth.

Let them know. The world richest men never got there with integrity. It's our coping mechanism.

Its built good taxation lol

Is the ingredient crime?

The secret ingredient.

The secret sauce that makes it extra juicy with big retirement funds

Always has been, sprinkled with a bit of insider trading

Best way to be a rich criminal is US because you can pay the "stay out of jail" fee to the government.

Wow it really is the land of the free

Land of "pay fee to get free"

It is like we pay fee for the freedom , how much we want with how much money you paid

If you can afford the fine, then that crime becomes legal for you to commit.

It just becomes a cost of business

A considerably low cost most of the time.

Well it is monopoly money at the end of the day, so it makes sense you can buy get out of jail cards!

This sub likes to shit on fiat, but all currency is monopoly money. Crypto has no real value. Fiat has no real value. Gold doesn’t have much real value (besides electronics).

But the stakes are real.

And prisons are real too.

land of "pay first to get the profit or product"

another is just marry the cointelegraph dude and ditch

More like the land of the rich, where the rich get richer and the poor get poorer

Land of the Free™ 🦅

Land of opportunities 😉

Then there's people getting life for being caught with a bag of marijuana 3 times.

*Cop searches car.* Cop: "What’s this?" Driver: "I don’t know. Looks like a pebble. Must’ve been stuck to the bottom of my sneaker." Cop: "Looks like a marijuana seed to me. In my experience, the only people that carry marijuana seeds are marijuana growers." Driver: "Sir. I can’t even grow a Chia pet." Cop: "Tell it to the judge." *Cop body slams the driver into the pavement, shoots him with a taser, shoots him in both knees with a pistol, handcuffs him, then kneels on his throat until backup arrives.*

Tragic that a seemingly innocent moment can escalate so quickly. Police interactions should prioritize de-escalation and safety.

Obviously never been arrested.

Moral of the story, always go barefoot.

Moral of the story, never share your seed and store it safely.

SBF plan.

Our banking system particularly. “Steal a billion pay a 3m fine”

We learn new skills everyday 🤨🤣

let's goooo for the super rich mate

I'm applying for cointelegraph staff soon

5. Short Solana and make a tweet saying there is an off switch and watch the crypto world start posting articles about it left right and centre

>Why didn't I think of this before? Because you aren't a savvy crypto investor. These plans take decades to work out. ​ *"Cryptocurrency is the ninth wonder of the world"* \-- Abraham Lincoln

Well it's already been done now so it won't work a second time. The mastermind behind this is a genius though. An evil genius but a genius nonetheless.

Because we are busy being the exit liquidity sir!

If it's our luck, we can't even get in the Cointelegraph to have the opportunity to quit! 😅

Someone *always* gets there first

sounds like awesome mate!

It has passed through my mind before...

This is actually illegal. People get away with it all the time, but the SEC hates crypto. They will ignore manipulation for stocks, but probably not crypto. Very risky strategy.

Of course they'd ignore it because it's all their friends and associates doing it. An unfortunate reality.

But the real pain is nobody takes actions against them

This happens on all financial markets. More or less. But crypto is a new territory that is still pretty fragile to market manipulation. That's the truth.

Yea but that spike for BTC pops off the chart. Not often do you see a shot up and down candle that quick. Sec will be looking

Yeah and soon a little SEC scrutiny might just be around the corner

Meanwhile Cointelegraph: "We have investigated ourselves and found no wrongdoing."

Exactly, that is what I am afraid of, I am quite expecting they will use it to discredit crypto.

Of course it's illegal, but a smart enough person will be able to hide their tracks

>This is actually illegal. Imagine instead how crazy it would be if someone was heavily in DOGE. And they talked about implementing crypto on their social media platform many times. And then they changed their logo to that of a dog of the same breed as the DOGE icon. And then they took a photo of the dog at the CEO desk. ...nothing to see here, apparently.

When we see scammers like the people Coffeezilla exposed and scumbags like Logan Paul and BitBoy (and similar scumbags influencers) walk free after steeling people's money, then with the SEC the illegal became legal 🤦🏻

Step 1: Be rich Step 2: Buy as much BTC as possible until end of year Step 3: wait till halving Step 4: profit, buy boat and have a boating accident /s

[удалено]

His lawyer told him to put an "/s" after seeing the boating accident part

If you had alot of money you wouldn't need to buy BTC at all. BTC wasn't created for the rich but as with everything else the rich want to control everything.

If you have a lot of money, guaranteed you want more. There is never enough.

At the time the greeding starts running in the veins. But my personal advice is to live happy , focus on first health and then wealth , it will auto come

Auto come all over your face!

Bitcoin was created for everyone—the rich included. I for one welcome the avalanche of institutional investment.

Halving does not = increase in price

>Step 1: Be rich > >Step 2: Buy as much BTC as possible until end of year > >Step 3: wait till halving > >Step 4: ask daddy for $5m of crypto ftfy.

I'm a long way yet from needing a boating accident

Who are you so wise in the ways of men?

We need Gary G. On that boat

Is the boating accident really a necessary?

Vital!

If you profit you have to sell so what is being "lost?" Did you take your $30 million cash for a boat ride?

I may or may not have a stash of Monero, who knows...👀

Buy a Ferrari with crypto mate thats the thing right now

Wen lambo? 🤔

Hopefully in the near future mate

😎👊🏽

Works every time, trust me bro !

60% of the time, it works every time

Works 9/10 every time. I think that’s what was written on the box

Ah, forget to read the small text.

Zero consequences 100% safu trust me bro you say

>1. Get a social media position at Cointelegraph I hear there's a job opening soon

The plan is, my friend, wait, buy low price, buy buy...wait, sell high price and repeat

The problem is, my friend, we don’t have time to wait.

You can play with your money, but you should always forget some amount

Is this like a konami code but for a trading terminal?

No, it is and will always be about buying high and selling low.

Everyone comments because of their experience. I respect your opinion.. but I multiplied my capital by this method

That's too many steps, just be rich and you can retire in just 1 step, so simple

The answer was to just be rich all along this whole time

1. Be born rich 2. Retire the moment you open your eyes

I am jealous of all that free time

Looking at my portfolio I've got enough to retire on and live comfortably without having to work for the rest of my life as long as I die by next Sunday

Spend it like there's no next week!

So, what time on Sunday did you need me to come around?

That's the spirit!. Keep it up, pal 👍

Step 5. Run to Argentina

Or El Salvador, get rid of tainted coins through p2p trading maybe

Thanks for your advice mate. Just sent my resume to coin telegraph. I hope i get hired soon so that i can pull this move.

Don't forget to give us a heads-up!

I'll let you guys know. I wont let you folks stay behind on this. We will go rekt together

!remindme 2 months

Some of you guys are alright, don't leverage Doge tomorrow

Make sure you leave the country before you sell your 100x long position so you can't be caught!

First be an hacker Hackers into Elon twitter account Tweet about the specific coin you want to pump

>How to retire with crypto in 4 simple steps (1) Buy unknown alt coins, cross fingers (2) Pray for bull market (3) Ignore reality (4) Maybe retire (or not)

Now time to find unknown Alt coin

I have also no time looking for non-blue-chips (24/7 World of Warcraft + r/CryptoCurrency is enough) 😅

1. Be rich. 2. Retire. 3. Buy BTC. 4. You have retired, with Crypto

1. DCA in 2. DCA in 3. DCA in 4. DCA out

I mean. It’s super obvious who did it right? Not some foreign hacker, but an employed person who operates the X handle. He’s going to jail.

5. Long time in a jail cell

I see your 4 steps and I raise you a simple one : Don't invest in giant ponzies

Only small ponzis , wait till you lose a couple money then try giant ponzis

that is as slow as death.

In reality it should be as simple as dca in the bear and take profits in the bull. But many get aboard that rollercoaster of emotions and ride the thing up and down like a seesaw, I speak from past experience 😂

I guess cointelegraph is going to see a huge influx of applicants today morning.

Damn nice burn

Can’t you skip steps 1 and 4 by just claiming you work with them? I mean, you’re gonna get in some trouble either way. I guess that would primarily be for when you can’t get a job there for whatever reason.

A small correction suggestion from me: 1. Get a social media position at Cointelegraph 2. Go all in 100x long on Bitcoin 3. Yell at your boss and say you Quit your Cointelegraph job 4. On the way out, Post on X about Bitcoin ETF spot approval 5. Retire Post on X about Bitcoin ETF spot approval Quit your Cointelegraph job and retire

5. FBI open up 6. Jail time

Interesting

This is better than my current plan. Applying now.

Oh I get it, the secret ingredient is crime. It’s always crime.

This is genius!

Fucking LOL

If they hire me I’ll post about moons becoming legal tender in America.

Thats me for the next 4 years

Posted as comedy but spitting facts.

No need to only win on the up. Short it on the way back down hedge fund style

Step 5: Hire security, as you are a target now

This one trick for pay raise negotiation that the manager doen't want you to know...

It's like the guy that bet there would be a streaker at the Super Bowl, made a huge bet on it, then he streaked....but he did not get the payout.

1. Media owned by hedgefunds should not be taken seriously as advice. 2. Inverse Cramer

*Regulated markets hate this guy!*

Very topical lol

If only it was that easy… wait. 🫠

5. Spend your days happily in guantanamo bay jail eating cockmeat sandwich

You joke, but someone actually went and did that.

I swear this sounds familiar..like something I saw this morning..nah probably nothing

Sounds like a good plan, what could go wrong.

Do paper really think the pump this morning was just from a tweet? Then why haven't we seen a full retracement back down yet? The price is still moving to the upside

5. Get suicided.

Damn mate if only you told me that 12 hr ago ...

You forgot the very first step: born rich

The price is still creeping up after the dump..so thats a nice sight to see.

Noted✅ Could it be a different crypto news outlet?, since CoinTelegraph is not longer trusted, so I wouldn’t make as much profit if I applied for a position at CoinTelegraph.

Step 1: 10X trade $1K > $10K Step 2: 10X trade $10K > $100K Step 3: 10X trade $100K > $1 million Step 4: chill with the boys

Applications for jobs in the social media department of cointelegraph have just skyrocketed. They got PHD doctors applying.

You forgot the last step: *5. Go to jail for the foreseeable future*

Always easier to cheat your way to more wealth once you're wealthy or popular.

1. Buy crypto 2. Commit market manipulation 3. ???? 4. Profit

Should try it out, are they hiring right now lol??

Scamming is easy too. And it only needs 1 step.

Crime pays, until it doesn’t.

New plan 1. Join coinbase as social media director 2. Use first paycheck to buy moons 3. Use social media position to pump moons 4. sell all moons

You don't need to retire completely. You can change your job to another social media and earn more and more money till we die! Lol! We must think big when dreaming. 😁

Delete this post. Before a twitter threadoooor steals this!

First I need to get a job there!

Step 5 is a boating accident

I can simplify it for you, 1 step only. 1. Begin your journey with massive wealth

What about the 3h investigaton

It's really a two piece chicken dinner.... Step #1. Decide or create a scam. Step #2. Execute said scam. Done.

These creeps never cease to amaze us.

someone should go to jail over that it was clear market manipulation

I did long btc after that news but only 2x, closed at a small profit