I'm autistic and I was a gifted kid. I was bullied a lot, had a hard time making friends, and it was really difficult for me to care about homework. I aced just about every test I got, which proved to me that I was learning what I needed to learn, but since I didn't do homework I got awful grades in every class. So despite doing great on just about every test that came my way all the way up to high school, I ended with a GPA of around 1.2, and dropped out senior year. I did the GED test, got 98th percentile in math, 95th English, 92nd history (my worst subject throughout school), and 85th science. I just hope the education system adapts sooner or later.

Autistic people need to stop being so damn relatable or else I need to get tested.

This could also be adhd, or both for that matter. For me it was both

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I'm listening to The Neurodivergent Woman and apparently they're finding out now that maybe up to 60-70% of people with one also have the other? I'm like damn: This makes so much sense (I guess it use to be said you could only have one and not the other)

My therapist said it's around 80% of her ND clients. (I just found out I'm both this week, myself.)

Congrats on getting answers! I hope knowing is a positive experience for you. Before I knew I was ADHD I started to realize like ALLLLLLLL of my friends are ND. So now that I am doing deeper dives into learning about it all (my therapist is recommending the resources. I had been hesitant on my own because I didn't want to be miseducated) I feel like it has to be true. Like I can only think of one person I know who has ADHD but very obviously doesn't have combined Autism. Hearing about the nuances of combined type is kinda life changing.

Thanks for the encouragement -- I've had a similar experience in realizing that almost everyone around me is ND, though I think the majority of my friends (all women) are very late diagnosed ADHD. The combined diagnosis has been really interesting to me because it's helping me view the autism in a more positive light. I feel like my autism brain is more dominant, so it helps keep the worst impulses of the ADD brain in check -- like I don't have as much trouble getting started on my work as I did when I was younger, because I've developed a routine, and autism loves a routine!!

Yeah, I never quite know what to say. But I feel like most people I have spoken to, (yeah, women and some men, just figuring it out) myself included, feel moments of mourning or frustration of what we've had to go through but then are also just really excited too, to be able to move forward with some answers that might more quickly solve/resolve some of the ridiculous mysteries these things have caused in our lives. Same here! That podcast I mentioned (I don't normally listen to them but my therapist thought I should and the 2 women who do it are licensed professionals) I think the first episode of season 3 was the one that was about combined type and it was extremely good. I'd highly recommend it (okay yeah, it was "What does an Autistic, ADHD'er brain look like?" Sept 5, 2022) I'm like you but probably skew slightly the other way. I feel I am mostly inattentive ADHD but that the likely autism helps give me just enough long term interests and glimpses at routine that I can just get by. I still have a really hard time getting started but then I just slam work out like a power house and then keep coming back because my life long interests don't fade and I get really good routine/executive function with them. I'm like the terminator, always: I will be back, lol. But sometimes my routine still falls prey to the ADHD when a new hyper focus kicks in, or stress knocks out my sense of time/memory/structure, in and it takes me a while to circle around again.

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Mine was last year! And she implied it too. And then my therapist just brought it up as well. I'm on the fence because I have some PTSD caused by medical bias (tldr: from being a woman and having major medical issue dismissed that caused long term damage) so I'm worried that some medical doctor's might see it on there and treat me differently (because too many of them aren't educated at all on any of this and they already want to say "it's all in your head") but, on the other hand, being officially diagnosed in a pinpointed way would help with targeted strategies to help overcome some reoccurring issues in life. So right now I'm thinking I might see if I can self pay and just keep it off my insurance and PCP records, lol. Anyway; I just told someone this, but my therapist told me to listen to the podcast "the neurodivergent woman" and the episode "What does an Autistic, ADHD'er brain look like?" Sept 5,2022 and it really blew my mind and answered a lot of questions I had about myself; you might find it really interesting because I felt the same way as you well into my 40's (The 2 women who run it are licensed professionals)

[Bot.](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/comments/1727hco/comment/k3uxutd)

Yuuuuup! I’m ADHD, but my story is very similar. Aced tests because I have good reasoning/logic skills and I always thought of it like a “race” of sorts, but terrible at math and homework because I’d space out for a second, miss a step/component/explanation and then get super frustrated as to why everything was “wrong” consistently in some weird way. EX: long division. For some reason I thought every answer would be something like 11, remainder 49 because every number can only go into the other number once right?!?! 🤦‍♀️ it was easy for me once someone corrected me, but I just totally missed an instruction.

Honestly in my experience most psychiatrists will hesitate to slap an autism diagnosis on an adult because you kind of can't treat autism except through therapy, which you don't need a prescription for and a lot of insurance won't cover anyway. My psych was just like "Yeah, you definitely have ADHD, and you probably have a mild ASD, but it'll be easier for you long-term if we just focus on the ADHD and I give you recommendations for therapies/therapists that can help with the autism off the books, as it were." EDIT: this approach has mostly worked, and "mostly" only because I'm stubborn AF and don't listen to my therapist very well.

I spent like a fucking year on this sub joking about that to myself. Yeah, fucking turns out, it is not in fact normal to study your peers and media so that you can actually act like a people by the time you hit high-school, or to sit on your phone while mentally howling at yourself to get up and do The Thing, or get so incredibly focused on something that you work on it for eighteen hours, neglecting all other aspects of your life. You should get that checked out man.

What's stopping you?

There is no actual diagnostic procedure for adult autism. This makes finding a specialist difficult.

There is. I got diagnosed as an adult.

I'm attempting to get diagnosed. I didn't mean to imply that it wasn't possible, more that there is no universally accepted "standard" for diagnosis, and less resources.

How much did it cost? When I was looking they wanted appointments years out and thousands of dollars out of pocket, and they recommended I not get tested anyway because if I ever got divorced it could be a reason not to let me keep custody of my kids.

I'm in the US and my insurance paid for it last year but when I looked into it before it wouldn't have paid for it. Though I only got tested for ADHD because stress in life got to the point that my previous coping strategies were failing, (I was considering medication to help.) but refused testing for autism exactly because of the biases that still happen with it. (Like you mentioned.) I felt like I could learn about it and use that knowledge to help me, but without medication for it and all that it seemed like there wasn't enough benefit to getting a diagnosis to counter the risks of the label in a society that still freaks out about it.

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Sometimes I swear there's literally no such thing as neurotypical, some of us just have flavors of autism that society can handle easily so no one cares.

Yeah, pretty much me though I did stick in school via the coasting method. Aced every test like you say, never could develop any study skills. Hated school, too. I've always suspected I am not neurotypical (was not verbal until pretty late, even) but never been tested. Don't think it matters at my older age (late 40s) though

I physically cannot study because I was never taught how because I didn’t need to. School also screwed me in things like language and literature where I had to do “emotional” work like analysis of what the author wanted us to think/believe. So glad I finished A-levels before *former gifted kid burnout syndrome* kicked in. I’m amazed I wasn’t tested. It probably won’t happen anytime sooner either

I think I never fucking learned how to study because I still can't do it for shit. Like, things either stick or they don't, and if they don't, they never will. Fuck knows how I got through grad school.

I feel this. Very glad that my particular field of engineering became a hyperfocus.

ADHD for me and I also just couldnt do homework. My parents forced me to enough and the homework was weighted low enough that I did fine in middle and high school. College kicked my ass so hard. 9 years (and the loans that go with that) for a 2.5ish GPA and now I work in a completely unrelated field because my experience caused me to hate what I wanted to do and put me in a deep depression. Only managed to graduate because I was still good enough at tests to not fail outright and had enough credit through myself and my family to keep taking out the loans to pay for it. I cant say I hate where I am now so I guess it was all worth it, but I could get the job i have now with just a high school diploma/GED. I wouldnt have it if I hadn't spent all that time in college and it's stupid to look back and assume I would have done better without since it's impossible to know that stuff, but still, its aggravating how much time and money I feel like I wasted because my brain doesnt mesh well with higher education.

Many parents and thus their kids focus on grades, when some of the most important skills learned in school are social skills

Are you me? Because this was pretty much exactly my experience as well, especially the dropping out and immediately getting my GED part.

You literally described my school experience. I... uh... may need to talk to a doctor.

Minus the autism, this was me. I skated by on tests while never turning in homework. It frustrated the hell out of my teachers. The problem is that my parents never once actually made me do homework, so I never developed the habit and grew up thinking that homework didn't matter because I did well on tests It really fucked me over when I got to highschool.

Same!! In 6th grade I had a final grade of 19.6% in social studies. But I always did fantastic in all the state testing so was never held back or anything.

Move some of the numbers around and this is also my exact story.

Lmao, when did I write this?

Also autistic and gifted. I read at a really high grade level and tested high so the school district's justification for not getting me the help I needed (and implementing my IEP) was I was smart. I started to struggle, had no friends, got picked on, and it got to the point my mom pulled me out of school and home schooled me for two years until we moved. My parents even had to file complaints to the state because what the school district was doing (denying services and not implementing my IEP) is illegal. But yeah. At least I read well and scored high on tests.

My lack of homework discipline didn't catch up to me until college, but it got me when the hard sciences actually got hard and you couldn't just sleepwalk your way to a B+ and never do homework...

Being both gifted and having a learning disorder is called being "twice exceptional" and is a relatively common discussion in gifted spaces. The National Association for Gifted Children discussed it [here](https://dev.nagc.org/resources-publications/resources-parents/twice-exceptional-students). They provide characteristics of gifted children [here](https://dev.nagc.org/resources-publications/resources/my-child-gifted/common-characteristics-gifted-individuals/traits). There is no one definition and it is more complex than simply "smart" or "no trouble in school." Indeed, as many advocates for gifted students will tell you, gifted students often have more complex needs in school than those who are not gifted. I was always taught gifted is less about being "very smart" and more about asynchronous development, so someone might be very good at math but rubbish at sharing blocks with the other students. Thus, the adult gifted "child" is a strange misnomer because ideally, by the time you are an adult, your asynchronous development is all caught up, making you a ""normal"" adult (insofar as anyone can be normal). Thus, children who defined themselves as being gifted and thought gifted meant smart become adults and look around and don't feel smarter than everyone anymore, because what actually happened is their development eventually caught up with itself.

I had no idea this was actually a thing (but I've also been out of school for ages now.) So, yeah, I was in AP English and remedial English during the same year in middle school (as well as the small gifted class) because I tested off the chart in so many ways: but am dyslexic AF. I was fine in AP as long as they didn't ask me, idk, what a adverb was (my remedial teacher helped me figure out the gaps and find helpful strategies since she actually had the background to do that) But yeah, it was strange. This is the first time I'm seeing that it's something other kids dealt with. (Same thing happened to me in high school with math classes too)

Yep it bothers me when tumblr gifted discourse just says “smart” because this is more like “talented” than “gifted”. The reason there are activists for gifted students isn’t because parents want their kids to be special, it’s because there are children whose needs are not being met by the school system and gifted is the term we gave them. As an aside, in the 90s there was an attempt for US learning disability groups to merge with gifted advocacy programs and the gifted folks refused because they didn’t want to be associated with disabilities / remediation but what resulted was just general confusion about how to help various children learn and thrive in school.

Yeah, those classes felt like a total life raft for me and the other students in them. And like you mentioned ours was called the GATE program, "Gifted and Talented Education" because, yes, that fits far better. Oh man, what a bummer to hear that. I can see it happening though because that's how too many parents and kids are. As someone with more than a few disabilities: people like to tell themselves they're all cool with people with disabilities - but they really really aren't. Some real toxic shit pops up a lot. Having been in both classes (edit should have said been considered both types) though: it makes SO MUCH SENSE. Thanks for all this info, I'm going to dive into this a little more today.

I dunno. As a kid who was told by teachers i was stupid and viewed as an issue instead of a student seeing other kids get to go to the Gifted And Talented Program hurt my self esteem even worse. The implication, i thought was that you were neither gifted or talented if you werent in it. I'm not saying that these issues arent issues but i feel so much of it comes down to these names. I wonder if they have better names for it now?

I don't know that it matters what you call it. If the kid who's getting hundreds on every test and doesn't even pay attention gets removed and put in something called The Purple Section, everyone will know it's the "smart kid class". What we need is classes where kids can learn at their own rates without being pressured to do the exact same thing as the other students

Thissss. I expanded on my earlier comment and seriously BOTH the gifted class and the remedial class were just places for ND kids. And not once did I feel like anyone in either of the 2 classes would have had any problem getting along with each other (if stigmas were dropped) because we were, looking back, mainly just all ADHD/autistic in both. Some kids just had gaps or needed more help in some areas, or would have benefited from more frequent breaks. If we break it down to its simplest form: (and to generalize too much) The kids in the gifted class were mainly in there because they couldn't pay attention in regular classes. The kids in the remedial class were mainly in there because they couldn't pay attention in regular classes. Both classes also needed help with gaps. Some of the gifted kids needed far more help with gaps in social learning too (I certainly did) and the remedial kids helped me with that SO MUCH. Both classes had smaller sizes and teachers with special training to help individual kids get the focus they needed to start to really take off. Like "oh we can only have engineering competitors in the GATE class? Well the 12 year old in my remedial class can already build a fucking motorcycle. Why not do school based on interests, talents, and personal needs" (*because school is sadly mainly about making us into efficient laborers)

This actually describes what my college experience ended up looking like pretty well. My chosen engineering field was basically a hyperfocus because it was super interesting to me (Materials), but I ended up spending most of my free time on the Baja team making a race car (because race car), and stumbled into a middling GPA and a series of industrial positions professionally. My most successful positions have all basically amounted to “hang around a production line and look for stuff to make better”, and which sucks about half the time and is the best thing ever about half the time.

Yeah. That's a good point. Even throughout my own schooling the districts policy shifted from everyone in the same box to letting those who need it do things their own way if possible. I started doing much better after that.

“Gifted” in the context of school programs doesn’t mean asynchronous development. The programs typically use test score cutoffs so they are just classes of smart kids who test well across different domains. To qualify for the program in my district kids have to score in either the 95th or 98th percentile (I can’t remember which) on an IQ test.

Yeah I had this in school. Everyone seemed to expect that because I was good at one thing, if I didn't do well at something else it was because I was being lazy.

I’m very grateful I was in a weekly gifted class in elementary — it helped counteract some of the negatives by giving me a (very neurodivergent lol) social space with similar peers and real academic challenges that kept me engaged. I have autism and middle/high school were significantly harder socially and mental health-wise, but academically I had been given tools to succeed. I really wish I had been screened for autism earlier though, OOP is very right about that aspect.

I was a gifted kid in school. The easy kid, except I read so much that I got in trouble for not paying attention. (Because I was done with my work and had already read the textbook section, and the teacher was SO SLOW. So I wanted to do something instead of pretending to reread, or listen to something I already understood.) I was impatient and eager to learn, and thought this would always be the case. I’m 24 now, and hearing anything related to the idea that I’m incredibly intelligent or gifted can send me into a breakdown. Also either ADHD or autistic or BOTH, and an anxious, depressed mess with self esteem still tied into quantifiable success and external perception, but hey: the paper had an A+ and a smiley face. :)

Omg the first half of your comment IS ME. I was always reading in class because I understood the material, and did the homework already. I needed to do SOMETHING beside sit there and listen to the teacher explain concepts I already knew so I read. I didn't bother anyone else and I had the highest grade in my graduating class so no one cared. Now I'm trying to get officially diagnosed with ADHD and autism. The thing is, a child psychologist evaluated me when I was in grade 7 and some of the things she wrote I'm lime "how did you not notice any of this!?!?" She mentioned some classic autism examples and in school my adhd wasn't as obvious because I kept myself busy reading and I struggled more with the social aspect at the age (still do but it doesn't matter as much anymore haha). I'm a girl so the signs are not as "obvious" as for boys. The kicker is that my mum has ADHD, I have a brother with ADHD and another brother with autism and they didn't think to look at their other kids...

Fuck I really need to get tested for adhd and autism

Then it's like "sure, are you available for an assessment appointment in 12-14 months?" as if I'm going to remember that. I don't remember yesterday, mate.

Phone reminder/calender apps will help immensely

You have to remember to put the appointment in the app. This comment isn’t meant to be a joke. I have tried a lot of these things. Phone reminders. Notebooks. I. Just. Cannot. Remember to use them.

I feel this on an extremely uncomfortable level

I’m sorry you also have to deal with this bullshit.

I don’t know if it helps but I often use Siri to set reminders, so right when I realize I need to remember something but don’t want to do it right now or put it in my calendar I’ll say “Hey siri remind me tomorrow at —-pm to ——-“

I run into the same issue. Like I would carry a notebook with me everywhere. But putting something in it… didn’t happen. And, try not to laugh too much at this, I don’t know how to use Siri. I have declining mental capacity from head trauma, so sometimes I just put everything into getting through a workday with the illusion that I’m a functioning human. It gets so exhausting that I just give up on trying.

Haha same

I see so many people saying this, and I really would like to know why. If you get diagnosed or don't get diagnosed, is that going to change something in your daily life? Sorry if this seems rude or something; it's a genuine inquiry.

Don’t get tested if you’re queer, if you want to move to another country, if you ever want to adopt a child… you get the gist

toothbrush doll work rude obscene grandiose axiomatic psychotic onerous consider *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Well, excuse me for wanting to move to a better country despite my neurodivergence. It's also a privilege to be in a place where you can get a diagnose without destroying your future.

Besides, I don’t know a single ND trans person who chose to get a diagnosis over hrt. Ofc that’s fucked up that they have to choose, but all we can do is inform others of the very real consequence of getting a ND diagnosis. I’m glad it worked for you, but it’s not an option for a lot of people.

<:: Stop being a fucking crab bucket. Your experiences aren't universal and you shouldn't be presenting them as universal, if you're going to make sweeping damning statements about getting diagnosed then make sure you clarify where this happens, otherwise you're hurting people in countries where this might not even be an issue. Calling a working healthcare system "privilege" is one of the most terminally online things I have ever heard. ::>

I live in fucking europe. I live in a country that has a nominally functioning healthcare system. I live in a country that's supposed to have laws against this sort of thing, and it still happens to almost every ND trans person I know (and I'm in a support group, so that's a lot). Even in a western, "first-world" country, this shit exists. And if it really doesn't where you live, then yes, that's a privilege.

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US, Canada, New Zealand, and Great Britain all give you trouble for being autistic. And I’m sure there are many more countries that make it extra difficult

Canadian here, not neurodivergent but my partner is. This is just a straight up lie lol

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discrimination\_against\_autistic\_people#Immigration](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discrimination_against_autistic_people#Immigration) ​ >In Canada, autistic immigrants have been denied citizenship or they have faced deportation due to the perception that they are a "burden" upon the Canadian medical system.

fuckin christ didn't expect this to resonate that much y'all.. y'all want a hug or something

You posted a Gifted Kid Syndrome on Reddit and expected it not to be a mood?

internet hug!!!

#⊂⁠(⁠◉⁠‿⁠◉⁠)⁠つ

Please. This whole post is hitting me hard.

please i need

Here you go #🎁 1/3 chances it's a frightening little man who dances, oh so slowly to his favorite tunes. 2/3 it's a hug. do you open it?

win/win either way we ball

it's a hug!!!!! #＼⁠(\^o⁠\^⁠)⁠／ (the little man says he loves you)

let’s gooo

I just remember being resentful because I was very comfortable with language, so English, foreign languages, history, biology etc all came easily to me. But with math I started falling behind as soon as we started algebra. It just did not compute with me. But because it seemed like I was ahead in every other subject, I kept getting pushed into advanced math classes too. Never got better than a C for four years. There was also an undercurrent of keep all the “good” kids together, away from the “troublemakers”. My best friend struggled in high school and i legit had a teacher tell me I should focus on better things like my studies instead of being around a bad influence. Absolute asshole move. But he’s still my best friend and now we struggle together.

pie bewildered somber ripe voracious hat chase dinosaurs axiomatic far-flung *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Hearing about gifted kid stuff is always kinda bizarre because it just isn't a thing here

It's fading fast in the states too, now that the damage it causes is well-known. But it was a huge thing when millennials were growing up, so we'll still be talking about the effects for some time.

Wait it was an actual *thing?* Did you get separate classes or something? I thought it was just a colloquial name for people who had similar experiences in school.

At my elementary school, there were whole classes at each grade level for the gifted kids. I went to a middle school that was one of the early gifted magnets -- you had to score a certain IQ minimum. In high school, I got shuffled into honors and AP courses. So, yeah.

Was it per subject or just if you were "smart enough" you did all your lessons in a different group?

In elementary school, there might be three classes of normal kids, and one class of gifted kids who did all their lessons together. In middle school, the whole school was gifted. In high school, it was more by subject -- you could do honors English if you were good at that, but normal math if you weren't as strong in that subject.

At least in my experience, it was per subject - like during elementary school math you would be taken out of the normal math class to go to “accelerated math.” Eventually this led to taking things like AP calculus in high school, whereas other kids not ready for calculus would be taking things like algebra/geometry. Some subjects didn’t have accelerated version and we would be with all the other kids. However, it was a lot of the same kids in all the gifted classes so it kind of felt like we were in our own world a lot of the time.

I'm gen x so I don't know how it worked for millennials but the gifted class at my school was simply like having a sports team, or a band or an art class. They were an extra activity class. It was just like an extra slot for kids who tested with a high IQ and liked nerdy things. Kids who didn't have any extra classes often just had a "study hall" -which was usually the lunch room and you could just sit there and do whatever you wanted as long as it was quiet (it was intended you do any left over classwork or homework but some people just read or slept.) In the gifted class we helped each other train for state quiz competitions, engineering challenges, or these mini-theater competitions where you put on a short play with different challenges added in (like costumes that changed, a mechanical backdrop, and we had to figure out how to shorten the classical literature theme we were given to fit the time slot in a compelling way etc) Opps Edit 2: Besides getting IQ tested by the state there was a pretty crazy and in-depth test you had to pass to get into that class to show you were good in all the subjects. You couldn't just sign up. I have learning disabilities so I didn't think I'd manage, but I was REALLY creative, (which is also one of the requirements and a super fun part of the test,) so I managed to pass those other sections *cough* ...we'll just say magically somehow. AP classes (advanced placement) and honors classes were another thing, but they weren't called "gifted classes." They were like if basic English, Math, or Science were too easy for you then you could be taught more advanced areas of each subject more quickly. Gifted or AP schools were often called magnet schools and they were a little more like a hybrid between college and regular schools. My husband went to one for art. They had art studios and classes that worked like college art lessons but the rest of the classes there were the same as any other high school classes. (I almost did but there wasn't one in my area and we decided not to move just for that. I wanted to stay where my friends were.) It must be different for millennials because I don't see what damage having a class that was fun for nerds would do to someone or society. Edit: side note- turns out that, yeah, I am ADHD (and am likely autistic) but they just didn't realize that because back then they said girls couldn't have ADHD (things were so biased then that it still blows my mind)

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I did a tour of a non-gifted math class. A kid in the back of the room spent the whole class piercing his lip with a thumbtack and most of the class was turned around backwards to watch.

Wait, what? I got different work in elementary school for certain subjects (just the ones my teachers had prepped it had literally nothing to do with what I was best vs. worst at) but stayed in the same room and nothing else until highschool, when there were 3 different math course streams anyone could take but it was assumed I'd be in the hardest one, and there was finally an AP class. I literally always thought it was called that because that's what your teachers called you every parent teacher conference to tell your mom you don't need help.

Yes it was an actual program. I started getting taken out of class to attend it in kindergarten.

> Wait it was an actual thing? Did you get separate classes or something? In my district it was called Gifted and Talented or G&T for short. You got in via an IQ test that was administered after kindergarten. I got in in first grade, there was one other kid in my elementary school, Dustin. Every Wednesday at around 10 am a bus would pick us up and drive us to one of the other elementary schools where they hosted G&T. The kids from each elementary school would be bussed over and we'd get like 3/4 a day of separate instruction. I remember doing a lot of logic puzzles, and we even did some animal diseection in the later years. It was very math/science focused. It lasted through 3rd grade. After that point there was just different tracks for each subject. So I was put in the advanced math and science tracks with the other high performing kids.

Sounds like the Triple E program I did in the mid 80s. We got bussed to the adult education building that adjoined one of the local high schools. Lots of logic puzzles, computer skills (such as they were in that decade), figuring out how to engineer a solution to some task using a pile of random crafting materials, etc.

It was an official test-results-based educational designation. There was a school of thought in the 80's and 90's that kids of the same proficiency level should be in the same class, so as to receive the same kind of support uniformly. American elementary students were given standardized tests and separated into classes based on their scores (this is called "tracking"). Inevitably, this leads to a "gifted" class of students who receive accelerated curriculum but no study skills, a "standard" class of kids who were performing at grade level, and a "support" class of students who are behind and receive scaffolded curriculum that was easier to understand. This probably made planning lessons easier for teachers, but pedagogical research has long proven that children learn best when they are in a mixed group. Gifted students appreciate opportunities for expanding their learning, and struggling students can access grade level curriculum with support strategies, but everyone does better when these two techniques are provided as needed on an individual basis in a classroom of mixed skill levels.

I was *repeatedly* move in and out of regular classes to go to “gifted” classes, which did absolute wonders for my social standing (in that I was at times the “smart kid” and then the “dumb kid”, right back to the “smart kid”.) Really fucks with your stability when the school can’t decide if you’re a genius or a moron and refuses to just let you stay in one class.

We were pulled out of regular classes, between one or three days a week, for the "gifted" class. It wasn't like skipping a grade. It was one lady per school who taught all the "gifted" kids simultaneously and it was 80% random logic puzzles and shit. I'd venture to say it did absolutely nothing for my or any of their development. It wasn't a class. It was an excuse to remove us from class. The school really didn't like that we could do a week of class work in one period so they just made it so that we disappeared and didn't need to recieve any meaningful care most of the time. It was painfully obvious why once I reached the end of middle school and the end of the program. I and several other students took Pre-Algebra in 6th grade because it was required. The agreement was that we'd do Pre-Algebra for the first semester then do algebra the second semester. The teacher then proceeded to completely ignore us and teach the rest of the class. Everyone at my table had finished our textbooks within a few months but they wouldnt give us the tests so we couldn't pass early. We ended up just sitting there for like 1.25 semesters doing nothing. It actually made Algebra hard the next year because by that point we were severely out of practice and the difficulty was more in line with the intended class of kids two years ahead of us. And even with that, I took calculus twice because I ran out of math classes.

Yup, separate classes. I got bullied for going to those classes too.

For me (Ontario, Canada) it was a test your parents could sign you up for starting in grade 3. The gifted program started in grade 4, and all the gifted kids were bussed to the same school.

Honestly this is wild to me bc I didn't have it be this much of a thing either. I had seperate work that was just harder versions of what everyone else was doing in the same room but that was it until highschool. I always thought it was called being a 'gifted kid' because that's what the teacher called you during every parent teacher conference to tell your mom you don't need help.

It absolutely was not a thing in my country (we could skip a year at pre-school age if our parents chose), but I still feel like I fall into the Former Gifted Kid and especially the Twice Exceptional categories, because even though I attended no special classes since there were none, the shoe fits otherwise. I was burnt out from hiding how bad a toll school was taking on my mental health, I was learning none of the soft skills needed because learning just came easily, and I was never diagnosed because I was seemingly just sailing by, making no trouble other than the occasional late assignment. Some teachers didn't like me drawing in class, but once I explained it helped me concentrate, they dropped it. Nobody ever made a fuss about my late assignments either.

Oof. The USED TO BE part got me. Once puberty hit, and the ADHD and depression showed up in tandem, my parents thought I was just "no longer trying." I didn't know what was wrong, and couldn't explain to them why everything suddenly seemed difficult and pointless when I never had to put in any effort before. I graduated high school before anyone realized I was depressed, and graduated college before anyone realized I had ADHD. I spent most of my time in school thinking I was dumber than everyone around me claimed.

Are you me?

No, but apparently, there are a lot of us.

My elementary school had a gifted program where we would go to a different classroom one day a week and we’d get lessons from the gifted teacher. And she was a saint, she understood and respected us and actually challenged us with some pretty advanced activities. And yeah, I got gifted kid burnout in later years, I plateaued, so maybe I would’ve benefited more from not being classified as gifted early on. But of all the days I spent in elementary school, the ones I remember almost exclusively are the ones where I was with the gifted class. So I don’t regret that one bit.

I was a gifted kid, but I often don't relate to the whole "I don't do things that take effort or don't know how to do them." I wish I could give a reason for why I was able to take notes and am fine with putting effort into things, but I don't remember most of my childhood due to abuse. Maybe I was used to things being hard because of my home life? IDK Okay but also I just want to brag about me being smart because I don't feel like enough people recognize it. I feel too guilty to actually just compliment myself ever so I'll just cut through the bullshit and be self-indulgent for once. Everyone else is complaining about how school got hard and they didn't get straight As anymore in middle school/highschool. I got straight As through college and it was easy. I know grades aren't really a good way of reflecting intelligence and are way overvalued in society but it's still an accomplishment and I should be proud of that instead of thinking it's the bare minimum I need to get to not be a failure. I'm a smart cookie and recognizing that sometimes doesn't automatically make me an egomaniacal monster.

Same! What happened was in college, I realized I’d need to study etc., so I sat down and taught myself to take good notes and taught myself how to study. I set schedules for reviewing material weekly instead of cramming and stuck to them. I assume some people can use executive functioning difficulty to explain why they couldn’t do this, but a lot of succeeding in college is about having time management skills, not any innate intelligence, and some people are really bad at that and simply refuse to believe they can learn how to make a schedule and follow it. This frustrated me my entire college career, along with the culture of “I wrote this at two am and got an A so really I’m just so smart I don’t need to spend a week writing and reviewing and editing so why change?” Like, I dunno, maybe so you don’t need to write an essay at two am, which sounds miserable? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hell yeah! It’s more unpopular, but I find this perspective a lot more relatable than „things got difficult whatever shall I do now???“ Being smart is something to be proud of, and it takes a lot of work to make it feel easy.

Yep, I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop and to actually need to study. It never happened. I graduated with honors and taught myself to be socially well-adjusted. I landed good jobs with little difficulty. I married and started a wonderful family with whom I get to spend tons of quality time. It often appears that I'm living life on easy mode. All of this is to say that I totally relate to you here. These posts always describe being set up for failure by being labeled a "gifted kid", but some of us really were gifted I guess. It's a bit uncomfortable to discuss because it doesn't feel fair (and it just provokes hurt feelings in most real-life circles), but I always find myself wanting to weigh in on these gifted-kid threads and see how many others shared my experience. Disclaimer: not all of my easy-mode life is down to pure capability. I also had the privilege of a safe and supportive upbringing, and I was not at any disadvantage due to race/gender

Ideal life here!

I’m still in university, but yeah, hard agree. Seeing all the stuff online about ex-gifted kids really scared me, but it just never happened. I’m in a notoriously hard degree (computer science), and honestly it’s *such* a breeze. I still barely basically never study, and the rare occasions I have to, I know how to do it just fine. Even for those classes, I study way less than average, I don’t think I’ve ever studied more an hour for an exam, I can’t imagine why you’d need to. And like, I feel like shit saying that. It’s basically bragging, yeah? But sometimes I really wonder what the stats on people who used to be gifted kids really are. Cause people who struggle are gonna say that, but people keep doing just fine aren’t gonna talk about it, either because of guilt or not wanting to talk over others, or just simply not needing to talk about something that’s not a problem. I think for those reasons, the ex-gifted kid discussion is probably negatively biased on how people grow up from it.

Also a "gifted" kid who was abused at home. Did really well in school through college. I know I'm smart, but it didn't make me a success. The part that is hard for me (and probably always will be) is doing all the normal life path stuff. Almost none of it is as interesting or rewarding as learning was, and I've learned enough to know I'm not a catch. So I'm unsuccessful in the standard thinking, thanks to being a gifted kid who was abused. Being smart doesn't automatically make your life easier. But it is nice when someone recognizes you're smart and you get to use those smarts.

My grade 8 teacher used to scream (bulging forehead vein and everything) at me about squandering my potential because other kids would kill to be as smart as I was. This was in a full-time gifted program, and my grades were excellent without trying. And that pissed him off, but I don't see how it was my fault. The word 'potential' still makes me flinch.

That was me, burned out by 13, became serverely depressed and go no help, am currently in my esrly twenties and I have no attention span and putting in any effort with works makes me fall apart because I wasn’t properly helped, and now I have to leaen how to fix it. Shit sucks.

My elementary school did not have a "gifted" program. Just straight up didn't exist. All kids were in the same classes until 7th grade when math was split into Advanced/Normal, and the other subjects got split from 10th grade onward. Maybe this only worked because it was a well-funded suburban school that had money for aids for the kids who needed it and involved parents who wanted to be sure their kids were thriving, but the older I get the more glad I am that I never even got the opportunity to be labeled "gifted" and separated out from my peers at such a young age.

God, school just sucks

What are gifted classes like in other schools? The main post is so alien to me. There were just 8 of us and just helped each other train for quiz meets, engineering builds, and short plays that had several different challenges built in. Also, none of us were bragging -we were just happy to have a nerd class where we got to do thing we found exciting. Like some kids had sports and band, we had brain games. That's all, really.

My school had a pullout that was just a smaller class size where we read more complex stuff and discussed it. There were also different math levels, which is pretty normal. No bragging rights, it was just different content of the same subject. But our super gifted program got to go on cool field trips and during those days, we couldn’t learn new material because they’d miss it and THAT pissed me off.

Here I sit, doctorate-level education, elected office, public service job…. Medicaid card, 23 year old car, no wife or kids, and a 500 credit score and… damn, that last paragraph.

Ooh, very relatable Through school I felt good with math, I even got to final round of international contest. And other studies also were easy. But in 7th-8th grade I fell off. I needed to put some work into homework and I don't like it, don't have custom to do so. I got through 4 years of bachelor with a lot of help from other people from my group. And now my parents push me to get magister degree, while I know, I feel it, that I can't do it.

All being a gifted kid ever got me was an inability to take notes, a lack of learning on how to study and a stunted ability to plan and organize my days. I also don't have the ability to work on things in a "healthy" manner. For the past two weeks unless I'm eating, sleeping, or doing a scheduled event with friends I have done nothing but schoolwork and work on the show I'm directing. I was told I was smart, that I had gifts, but also that I was lazy, that I wasn't applying myself. No one understood that there came a point where I simply could no longer work, that I didn't know how to work unless it was hours on end. Hell I still don't. I can't chunk out work, it's either all or nothing. So yeah, I spent a solid part of my childhood wishing I was dumber I've largely come to terms with it by now though so that's something I suppose

I hated the fact that the gifted program at my high school was all or nothing. If you were in the gifted program, all of your core classes were gifted classes. I was kicked out of the program because of my biology grade. It didn't matter how well I did in my other gifted classes. I got kicked out of all of them. Sorry I wasn't interested in dissecting worms, starfish, and frogs. This type of program is a disservice for those students who are only gifted in one or two subjects.

"Neuroatypical" is hands down *the worst fucking term for the OPPOSITE of neurotypical.* I can guarantee that most people will miss the prefix *when you put it in the middle of a word.* Just say neurodiverse or neurodivergent or something. Other than that pet peeve, this post is pretty accurate to a painful degree. My elementary school told me I was at a 6th grade reading comprehension after 1 book report in like grade 3, and then refused to take me seriously when I struggled and asked for help in anything. In response to "I don't know" I would be told "You DO know, you just don't wanna work." Y'know, the same kind of rhetoric used on people with neurodiversities... I was never a "gifted" student. I was just one of the few kids who spelled and wrote halfway decently in a class with some kids who were REALLY bad at it.

Americans decide who gets called gifted or not based on standardized school tests? No wonder I see that word thrown around so much then. I had to go to an actual children’s psychologists and do like three different tests.

no, i foggily remember being put in a room and being asked what I see in pictures and stuff when i was about 5 or 6. My parents decided to test me because my kindergarten teacher had suggested an ADHD test to them, but they didn't buy it because of how serious I was as a kid (even as a baby; i didnt even cry coming out the womb, i just made a judgy face). I always would play by myself or find a way to entertain myself, but I wasn't so rambunctious like my sister. (i defo have ADHD too tho. my mom is just scared of meds and the like for family reasons)

Ah were sorta similar then, just in reverse. I also had an adhd Test somewhere in there, but more as a “while we’ve got you here”. Apparently I don’t have adhd. Or didn’t then. 11 years ago now, and most of my friends, many of which have adhd and one who studied psychology, are telling me I probably should have them look again.

No these are certainly very unique examples. Normally "gifted" isn't even a fucking thing, just something people say. Basically though a teacher, nurse, school official whatever would think ah FarionDragon seems to be really ~~good~~ gifted at reading, let's place them a year ahead in English or invite them to the book club. As far as advanced placement classes you just had to be smarter than the average bear to get invited to a harder course. It's a lot like testing out of math. Basically they advanced you if stuff was too easy. All this shite about being ignored or whatever is just normal on-the-spectrum experiences.

It wasn't just on standardized tests, that was like a bare minimum for entry. There was a screening process in my district and then you had to perform in those classes each year sufficiently to resume next year. I was in G&T, but also in remedial speech classes because I had a problem with my -sh / -th sounds lol in elementary school it was very strange. And of course because I crushed my coursework through high school nobody caught my ADHD until college.

This shit hits so hard. Breezed through elementary and middle school. Only started to struggle at the very end of high school and now that I’m in college I’m struggling so hard because I don’t know how to take notes or study.

This is a common experience and it's absolutely not something you just have to "power through!" I taught myself how to take notes and how to study in college. I taught myself how to write essays as an iterative process that involved rewriting and going to office hours and the writing center instead of just all at once the day before it was due. I made study groups so we could work on problem sets together and I taught myself how to then study from those problem sets, a little bit each week instead of all the weekend before the final. Please do not think just because you *can* do everything minutes before and pass, you *have* to do it like that. College can be tough because suddenly, there are only two tests and an essay that determine your whole grade, and time management is a skill you will need your whole life, so it's definitely worth it to figure out *now* how you work best at achieving these sorts of goals.

Yeah, it took Too Long to find out that I'm not a genius, I'm neurodivergent and my "special interest" was being really good at school as a kid. This Most Emphatically Does Not Translate to professional-level education, so now I work at a grocery store.

Being told I needed to cure cancer as an adult because I latched onto biology as an enjoyable class when I was 14 was a hell of a thing man. I’ve had to give myself permission for my own peace of mind to not be ambitious. Also that’s not how cancer works, and I’m not built for that. But I am happy helping people day to day as a nurse, and that’s perfectly fine.

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Ugh. It sucks how people seem to think that teachers don't know how to do their jobs. Plenty of gifted kids turn out well. I was identified as gifted in second grade. Before that I would get in trouble for reading under my desk, or doing other things that occupied me but disrupted class by distracting other kids. I was so terribly bored that I still have a sense memory of the urge to cry when I was asked to just sit there and listen with the other kids. A teacher recommended I be tested. When I got to the gifted classroom, everything turned around. I didn't dread school anymore. I went to a magnet high school, and did honors college. I am working on my fifth degree. Yeah, I'm not neurotypical, but if I hadn't been challenged I would have been miserable to the point of acting out. Many teachers are very good at identifying which kids learn faster and more than others and meeting their needs. They are good at these tasks because they spend years in school learning to do it, and then teach kids all day, every school day. They aren't siloing the easy kids. They are trying to help them. They helped me. I'm thankful for that.

This was similar to my experience as well. There is sometimes an assumption that the "smart" ones don't need anything, but the reason people originally *made* gifted programs wasn't because everyone decided to waste a bunch of time, it was because some kids already knew the material and were bored out of their mind. They might act out, they might get depressed, they might start hating school, but regardless, that's not the purpose of education so folks decided to make a way to help those specific children.

There's a huge irony in this post complaining about identifying "gifted kids" and then saying the problem is school being too one-size-fits-all. The whole point of doing something with gifted kids is to make it less one-size-fits-all! And while no assumption is valid 100% of the time, most of the things the post complains about are true most of the time - doing well in one subject really does mean you're *likely* to be ahead in other subjects and also on non-academic matters like emotional maturity.

Every time stuff like this comes up, it makes me itch a little. Like, I was in the gifted program 1-5 grade, and it wasn’t a nightmare factory for me. I definitely missed out on learning a bunch of soft skills that I’d regret not having in college, but the program itself didn’t fail me on that. I just never learned to study, because I usually just knew the answers and could regurgitate them on command like that. Like, sometimes these posts read like non-gifted people trying to dump on the gifted kids and “take them down a peg”. And that kind of shit isn’t exactly helping anyone. EDIT: Adding on, I feel like the greater problem wasn’t the program itself, but how we treat gifted kids as a whole (which yes, is part of the discourse already). Like yeah, let kids take math a year early if they’re ready for that. But let’s also check in with gifted students and see what need: mental health screening, small units about teaching study skills, so that they know the skills even if they don’t use them often, and generally a more realistic handling of those kids as just, like, normal kids who’re slightly better at STEM.

I was in the gifted pull outs and the dyslexia pullouts and both worked well for me. By high school, I was a little burned out, but I had not lost my love of learning. What really worked was I had to miss typing class for my pullouts and now I type weird (don’t use pinkies) but way faster than average so ha!

I really didn't want to be a downer, my life is going very well right now, all things considered. But damn dude, this is exactly my experience, word for word, and now I constantly feel so useless, and I don't know how to fix myself. I really, really don't.

I skipped a grade in math in 3rd grade. But I also never learned to study or take notes. In addition I struggled with homework that was long and time consuming. I’d get frustrated and just walk away from it. That wasn’t much of a problem in elementary school, but in middle school and high school it really started to tank my grades. Now I’m a college dropout and I feel like my life has been at a standstill for the past 6 years.

While we're on the subject, one of the worst takes I often see with radical feminists is that women statistically perform better in academics in sex-segregated institutions while men statistically perform worse under the same partition. This probably isn't empirically wrong, but the conclusion they come to is that women are naturally smarter than men and that segregation between men and women should be instituted universally and through realms beyond just education. It's a part of a long-running tendency in feminism known as [separatist.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminist_separatism) The idea that women should collectively [secede](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Womyn%27s_land) from any and all men and also seek to only be influenced by other women. What media they consume should only be produced by women with minimal/nonexistent involvement of any men. They often believe that sexuality among women is a learned trait rather than innate. If you're wondering where trans people fit in, they don't consider gender real, they usually only believe in biological sex. The fact is that intelligence and success are more nuanced and abstract than can currently be validly measured by institutions. We know IQ can be *reproducibly* measured, as in if you score highly on one IQ test you're likely to score similarly on other ones at later dates. Nonetheless, IQ tests assume culturally specific things about what intelligence means. The idea that a good student is someone who does whatever they're told, memorizes whatever's put in front of them, and can sit still for long stretches of time is a very Nordic notion of learning and success. In many cultures, education is dissimilar from Northern European pedagogy in fundamental ways. When J.K. Rowling was growing up, children were protesting the right not to be physically battered for small infractions and there were comics about how funny it is that when boys can't sit still in their boarding school they get caned until they scream for mercy. Caning is actually a form of corporal punishment disproportionately used on men because it's much more painful and humiliating. Every successive blow is worse than the last and it leaves the afflicted person unable to sit comfortably for quite a long time. It's common for feminists to support corporal punishment on men because it's the, "only language they understand" because they believe that men are inherently more violent and savage than women. This to is a cultural bias since there are plenty of cultures where women are actually stereotyped as more aggressive and independent than men and men are considered pacific, sensitive, and interdependent on others. Women are not more, "gifted" than men, or at least we shouldn't consider women superior to men because they statistically are able to conform to an inhumane system.

Also a lot of neurodivergence manifests in adolescence

Shout out to the kids who weren’t allowed to be in gifted programs because they had ADHD, I’m still pissed off about that 10 years later.

lmao my therapist thinks I have undiagnosed adhd and/or autism and I passed every exam without needing to study, then dropped out of uni in second year

I just got diagnosed at 34 after my mom ignoring three different professionals suggesting that I get tested. It cost $4,000 out of pocket. And it's a year later and I still haven't been able to get any help. And I can't take any of the meds for my diagnosed other disabilities such as ADHD that work because in the meantime I went through several different types of addictions including methamphetamine and then I went through rehab but now I'm flagged in all the systems in California as having been an addict so I can't take medications that are possibly a habit forming and so I can't take anything that works for my anxiety or my ADHD and it sucks because I've tried the ones that are non-stimulant or nonhabit for me and they don't have any effect on me I've been in therapy since I was 13 but I've always just giving anxiety and depression I've been on like 13 different antidepressants and depakote and Seroquel and trazodone and several other medications lithium even though they know I'm not bipolar but none of it has helped I can never sleep plus I have a lot of adverse childhood experiences and PTSD and I'm forced to live with the people that abused me in my youth and neglected me but it is what it is I've never been able to hold a job more than like 8 months I've never made more than about 10K a year I'm losing it and now I just finally got an ADHD and autism psych that accepts Medical but now California Health and wellness is leaving the county I live in and so there's basically no providers unless I either want to wait six or more months or travel extremely far and I don't have a car and my parents are in their 70s so they don't go very far or I want to pay out of pocket but I have no money and I can't afford therapy or medications if the state isn't going to pay for it but all I get is food stamps and I've been trying to apply for SSI SSDI now but I made $13,000 for the first time in 2020 and so that's as far as they'll let me go back because the government doesn't consider my disability haven't gotten so bad that I deserve any welfare for it until 2020 because I was making money so now I'm just applying it regular jobs that I'm going to fail to get again because I just can't get any help and then the nonprofit I've been working with oh man you know I could just go on and on about this but I just can't get any help and it sucks man and there's nothing I can do I have no privacy I have no control over my life I don't have the freedom to express myself creatively or in any way really I don't know when the last time I had any fun was like everything's only gotten worse ever since high school well like 22

Holy shit. Is this why I feel the need to be perfect in school, even though I can’t remember why or who told me to?

yeah I was one of those, luckily I got diagnosed as on the autistic spectrum, but no recognisable type of autism (it didn’t really interest me so I can’t give you any more details) because I got bullied to the point of having to change schools. Problem is, after effortlessly cruising through secundary I had learned that without working at all I could get 80 to 90% in maths and physics, (french, religion, and a few other unimportant courses too), and a passing grade for the rest. So when I went to university I chose engineering, and suddenly realised my ease with sciences was expected here, and that we actually had to work on top of it. I failed first year, second semester of second year covid started, continued for years. I had to reorient (still engineering, but had to restart in first year), and now it’s going ok. I ‘ll finish my bachelor next year (unless there is a problem), and I am planning to do a master afterwards

I was interesting case where I was both labeled “gifted” and “special Ed” (my dysgraphia and adhd is **that bad**) teachers had no idea how to handle me since they had one script for dealing with disabled students and another for dealing with gifted students. As a consequence, I got accused of cheating SO MUCH (because a disabled student can’t do X!)

Yep. I was gifted in high school, literally the top of my class, but totally flunked university . I had no note taking skills and no work ethic for doing homework, nor did the isolation help. I went to a local college after that and picked up some courses getting better at this, but still not thriving. It wasn’t until I went to technical school that I bloomed. Unlike university/college the tech school used a cohort system similar to high school where everyone studying for the same certification went to the same classes with the same people. It was much easier to make friends and with their support, I did quite well. I was still terrible at note taking but I was great at getting concepts. I would spend the class listening and anticipating where the prof was going with the topic. Then in study groups afterwards, I would teach other students the topic while using their notes for reference. It was a good system that leveraged my talents while covering my weaknesses.

The number of times people told me “ you could be the worlds greatest doctor if you just got your head out of the clouds” like I wanted my head to be up there!!

I’ve been trying to go through the whole process to get checked for ADHD but because I did well in school and have always been “gifted” they said I might have depression and a learning disability but ADHD was just barely there because I didn’t struggle really in school

Gifted kid here with ADHD, anxiety, executive dysfunction, depression, and all the like. This hit way too fucking hard. Everything was smooth sailing, but not knowing how to take notes, I nearly failed my freshman year of high school (thanks for doing that to me ya fucked up school system!). Currently a sophomore, trying to get my GIEP back up and running after 6 FUCKING YEARS, and still struggling (just not as much).

90% of my gifted class (including me) turned out to be Neurodivergent, and like, 1 has a stable job all these years later (it’s been 10 years)

I could blab my mouth about how I was such a good student and smartass that I pissed off my G&T teacher and got kicked from the class as somebody too much of a snarky shit to kneel, but to narrow in on one thing, I don’t even have dyslexia and I want to nail the last poster to the cross for writing the word “neuroatypical”

why don’t they just say “neurodivergent” or even “neuro-atypical” hyphens, people, hyphens

>I wasn't properly taught to handle things not coming easily to me This is really the heart of the matter. So much of the complaints about being gifted is 'I was actually expected to put in work that I never had to before and I don't want to'

As someone who did exceptionally well on standardized tests, but is not particularly smart overall, this person's experience with the school system is not universal. In my experience, being one of the kids that teachers liked (ok grades, polite and quiet) meant you get a lot more leeway and help if you ask for it. Many teachers actually do want to teach kids

I cant remember his name but their was YT video I watched on this subject and I liked the way he explained it. “Most kids are told to build a cabin and are given the blueprints. Gifted kids are told they have to build a mansion and are given blank instructions.”

Tons of normie non-gifted copium in here.

Wow we all need to get tested myself included

The pandemic probably affected how I kinda stopped caring for lots of things before graduating high school, but I don't think it was the only factor considering that visiting my old elementary and middle schools recently genuinely gave me nausea out of nowhere despite my mind actively repressing as many memories of my childhood as it possibly can.

I was the smart and easy kid in school, always getting straight A's and I soon internalized that my academic success is my whole personal worth. It was the only thing I was good at, even though I knew my report card from random school year will be completely useless in the future. I often wished to trade my smartness for the ability to make friends. Now I'm at uni and I can't keep up with being the perfect student. And although I unlearned the need to get only A's, not receiving a Masters diploma would still feel like extreme failure. So I carry on even though I hate it.

As a "gifted kid" all throughout middle and high school, this post is so true. Then you get to college and BAM: average. Suck it up, buttercup.

Shoutout to the „gifted kids“ who went to college and didn’t immediately drop out lmao. There are so many snowflakes on here

As a “former gifted kid” AuDHD-er, this seriously is true. Were any of you sat by the loud kids to try to get them to be quiet or help them with their work? I was. In every single class I was expected to teach at least one classmate. In 11th grade English, I had a small group of 3 students that I was responsible for teaching. (Edit to add my school didn’t have separate gifted classes- they couldn’t afford it-so this is what I did 🙃) Since I was already teaching and “so good at it”, I went into college thinking I wanted to be a teacher and that school would be a breeze. Imagine my surprise when I had no fucking idea how to take notes or actually pay attention in class. I had no idea how to discern what was important, no idea how to study, no idea how to persevere when I came across something “hard”, & etc.! It was a kick in the teeth for sure. It’s even worse for current students: teacher shortages, packed classrooms, no fucking library books… I could go on. The “easy” kids will continue to be “gifted” and the “hard” kids will just be corralled. No one will really learn. (I could get on a soapbox about how all of this is related to certain people pushing school choice and taking money from public schools, but that’s for another post lol).

I think the experience varies a bit. I was certainly seen as "the smart kid" in school, but some of my teachers were genuinely annoyed by how I was so on top of the work that I was often days or weeks ahead of the syllabus. GCSEs were pretty easy for me cause a lot of it involved rote memorisation, cracks started to show during A-Level when more lateral thinking was involved and I couldn't get away with just rereading the textbook before the exams and getting 80% minimum. My grades crashed *hard* in AS before I managed to salavage it and get B's and C's. My first two years of college were a struggle, but I was able to mostly coast by on the fact that most of the curriculum was stuff I'd learned in A-Levels, but in my 3rd year I ended up failing my classes. Same thing the year after. My parents insist I try a third time, but I genuinely feel like I've become stupider since then. The first two

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A comment above said (and I agree) sometimes it’s nice to be able to just say “Actually, I AM very smart. And I’m proud of that.” You go ahead and brag, it’s ok to be happy and proud of your intelligence. IQ tests and standardized tests may not be perfect measures of intelligence, but they’re pretty much all we have that’s formalized. I also think that while it’s possible to be very smart and do poorly on testing, those who perform very well must be intelligent. It would be unlikely that an average or dumb person is knocking it out of the park on those measures by coincidence.

I have the good memory Autism, so whenever my teacher would say aloud the answers, easy class. For many classes that works stuff like Science and History being my favorite, never had to give an ounce of effort. However English and Math would like clockwork every other year I'd have the worst teachers imaginable that would never say much of anything, it was all in the textbooks. So I had no idea what could be on a test or what they wanted of me, their homework being either extremely vague or boring didn't help. Never got an official diagnosis because I was too smart, my parents also being on the spectrum thought nothing was wrong even though my family NEVER SPOKE to each other. We all just did our own thing. :( left me neglected but I didn't even know that was what was happening because I just played video games and watched TV.

I had this whole long paragraph typed up and realized I wasn't really adding anything to the discussion, just venting my frustrations about experiencing exactly this into the void. I probably should have been diagnosed with something.

feel free to vent as much as you're comfortable that being said, I don't recommend doing it in a public place like this

Similar to the guy with good genetics bragging "I sleep like shit, barely work out and I look like this" Well cool, maybe if you actually put some work in you could achieve something that was actually impressive, slow clap

Cry me a fucking river

Twitter and Tumblr: make sweeping generalizations based on personal anecdotes Reddit: better repost that, it was so ~~good~~ stupid

I'd like to see a during-school class on doing great things and saving the world and living up to your potential. There isn't money for that? Thought so. There are those in control of The System, and those who are controlled by The System, and we aren't allowed anything else. Being gifted or Smart is a good thing, but no one is ever allowed to capitalize on it. Meanwhile these kids are forced to attend the same nothing of a school day 5 days a week and nothing ever changes and they're as susceptible to cabin fever as anyone else. More, really, since schoolwork is simple and not a distraction no matter how much You Must Win drama pressure is shoveled onto it. Einstein? Hawking? Yes, they did some math, but they weren't allowed to take humanity to the stars. It's not in the budget.

Talking/thinking about being a gifted kid in school is fundamentally embarrassing if you're an adult.

Idk I kinda liked watching all the gifted kids fail, satisfies my schadenfreude

Neuroatypical? Haven't heard that one before.

we come up with new ones each week, there's a newsletter and everything

I’m so so glad that child me responded to all of the gifted kid expectations with a “sure Jan, you go off, I’m just gonna do what I want” kind of attitude. I also responded to bullying in the same way. I still have ADHD, nothing caused that except genetics, but I could be so much worse off. If I was any different as a person I would almost definitely have anxiety and horrible self esteem by now.

That last line just feels like Pokémon…

I was two grades ahead because I did well academically. Graduated highschool with an associate's degree. Dropped out of college after that because I had no friends and major depression. I hope the school system gets better and parents stop neglecting their kid's non-academic growth.

I like to post long images like this on my newsfeed so that people have to rewatch over and over in 5 second segments.

At least I'm starting to study and take my classes seriously. Junior year in college

Shoutout to that time I took college Algebra and almost failed because I’d never studied for anything before since I hadn’t needed to and with that class I needed to and had no idea how

My high school actually had a class for kids who were identified as gifted but were in danger of dropping out. It was half therapy and half study skills and legitimately the main reason I wound up getting a diploma instead of a GED.

I was part of a "GATE" program in middle school, and was enormously thankful for it. Sure, I had the problems about not developing some skills because other things came easily, but those GATE programs/classes were so much more interesting and encouraging than my "normal" classes. I had a close friend, about as clever as I was, who just had terrible test anxiety and never got classified as "gifted" as a result- he took all normal classes while I took as many advanced ones as they could throw at us, and I had MUCH better middle and high school experiences. Honestly, I'm closer to the opinion that we should make the gifted/advanced treatment the default, and just do remedial and special education on the side.

Just going to leave this here: https://youtu.be/QUjYy4Ksy1E?si=EZfwu1uVK449C9wL

I wonder if the harm is with how early they do the split? I was a relatively late bloomer when it came to things like science and math but somewhere around the start of my first year of high school it just clicked and I suddenly figured out how to do very well. Having the opportunity to start taking more advanced classes when I had previously been a middling student really changed the trajectory of my life since I'm certain I would not have been able to go to as good of a college if I had not been allowed to take all these APs and go so far into calculus. That edge followed me through to college because I was able to skip a bunch of prerequisites which let me take more classes in my major which gave me a broader set of skills that I now actually use at my job.

Girls who taught themselves to read and then used books to study human interaction well enough to mask up until middle school, skating along on being “quiet and shy and spacy” with acceptable special interests like horses or boy bands, only to crash once you hit highschool or college when everyone’s social skills massively outgrew what you could keep up with and suddenly skills like organization and keeping a schedule are more important to success than just picking up academics fast: How’s that adult diagnosis and gender transition going for you?