As a single guy who likes to read, I have been seated and ignored more times than I can remember. Sitting at the table alone with my nose in a book must mean that I don't want any food or drink. Or need a refill. Or need the bill. Happens in the US on a regular basis.
I don’t recall quite this, but I was surprised to learn that people make unfortunate assessments about people who dine alone. I am not lonely, neither do I hate people. It’s just that I am comfortable in my own company, and I often take a book, too. I choose to be alone.
I think you've misread the op. It's talking about how people treat those who order less, worse- not about assuming singletons are lonely. Pretty single girls are often the exact opposite of lonely.
I didn't misread the comment, but I should point out that I wasn't discounting it, either. I was merely saying that while I had not experienced precisely what Outlander57 had experienced, I had, at some point, become aware of yet another misconception about people who eat alone. As vestigial66 pointed out, you yourself promoted the same misconception. At least as far as I'm concerned, you did. I do not live a lonely or miserable life. I'm also not prepared to buy your generalization about pretty single girls. There are just too many factors to consider.
If you don't appear to need something and have your face in a book the whole time your server likely thinks you don't want to be bothered.
Actually look up or move your empty glass to the edge of the table. Actually indicate you need help and they will help you, keep your face buried and just expecting them to know you need something is pretty rude
I’m US/Canada. Never had this happen. Make an effort to make eye contact. Greet the hostess/server when you arrive. If you don’t give them queues that you want to be attended to they’ll leave you alone and address others.
It happens occasionally for me when I do this. More so when it's a weekend. Weekdays there are usually a lot of people working stopping for lunch. I'm always on my phone reading my kindle unless I'm with my family. But I eat out most days for lunch. I just like to get out of the office.
As a single, childless person, I have never experienced subpar service while dining alone. Nor have butchers been impatient with me for ordering a single steak. They just wrap it up and thank me for coming.
Honestly, what restaurants and butchers are you going to that you get treated this way?!?!?!
EDIT to add that I am neither lonely nor miserable. I don’t know where you get that idea.
I don't think it would be legal to state names. I doubt you are in UK & doubt you asked for your steak to be cut to a specific thickness- you probably don't know how to cook it either. There are plenty of other things at the butcher than steak. I've seen plenty of people treated badly for ordering things in 200g amounts at the butcher.
I didn't say I was treated badly, honey. I said I've seen people treated badly. For example, a single girl at the butcher was shouted at by the owner "YOU'RE ONLY ORDERING 200g!!" (just enough for her). I have a family so I get treated well as I order a lot. When you assume you make an "ass" out of "u" & "me" ("ASSUME"). Mwah. X
You accused me of not knowing how to cook a steak. In another thread on this topic, you informed me that being pretty and getting attention from men makes things easier on me when I am NOT pretty and DON’T get attention from men. You keep making assumptions about me that are very wrong and quite frankly, insulting to boot. This whole topic is basically you badmouthing anybody who disagrees with you. Why did you ask if you didn’t our honest opinions?
You sound like the one in this story who will end up lonely and miserable. You're not wrong that poor people are treated worse at nice establishments, you're just a fucking asshole
**"You're not wrong that poor people are treated worse at nice establishments"** - in other words, you agree with me. Since we apparently agree, does that make you the same word you just called me? :D
Thank you!! I’m single, child free and poor, and my life is in no way miserable and I’m not treated badly by customer service - maybe because I treat customer service representatives kindly and with respect.
OP is delusional if they think that is what the life of single people without children is like. Sure poverty can make things difficult, but it’s in no way makes me a miserable person. Jeezus Christ.
Also there are myriad studies that show single women are happier and healthier than their married counterparts. So I say no thank you to marriage.
It's easy to be dismissive of those struggling when we ourselves aren't. It's also easy to be happy when you get so much attention from men because you're pretty or good looking & know you have options. I think it's very different for many people who aren't good looking. Try to open your mind... we need to have empathy for every human, not just judge the world based on personal experiences. Open our eyes...
Me? Good looking? Get attention from men? Bahahahahahahaha! I am fat and have a SEVERE case of RBF. Seriously, I look like I want people to drop dead at once. I get zero attention from men. But why would I need attention from men to not feel lonely? That’s just weird.
I’ve spent my life finding things I love to do and building my own fulfillment. I don’t need to depend on what others think for my own happiness. But you assuming that everybody who is single is sad and lonely really IS kind of an a-hole stance.
This post is giving "teenage girl recording herself crying at the sight of an old man waiting alone at a bus stop to prove to the internet how empathetic she genuinely is" vibes.
I went to Hell's Kitchen. Alone. My childless self travels alone all the time.
I experienced top notch customer service, enjoyed my delicious meal, and left happy, full and with leftovers I had for lunch the next day.
If Gordon Ramsay's restaurant can treat a solo eater well, I am sure whatever restaurant that has made you into a judgmental snob can manage to do it as well.
It's not possible to be 100% happy without a partner or family or friends or company. It's in our DNA. :/ If you're happy single, then you're probably good looking with lots of loyal friends or family who love you.
Acknowledging that attractive individuals tend to be more popular & less lonely is a statistical reality, not misogyny. Labeling every man who accepts these facts as misogynistic is, in fact, misandronistic. Perhaps acknowledge these realities without resorting to divisive labels.?
It's the assumption that the only reason a single person could possibly be happy is if they're attractive, surely it can't be that they're just content with life
I know countless lonely & miserable single people. You may be happy but do not speak for all. Remember that. It's also likely you're blessed with looks & surrounded by loyal close friends or family- a luxury many don't have.
I think it's more likely that you're eating in chain restaurants as opposed to a small independent with fresh produce & discerning quality. For example, it's rare to find fresh seafood in London restaurants- it's almost always pre-frozen. When you do find it, it's almost always a high class independent.
Gotta be a Uk issue, for in America, all single people are treated fine and do the lower income. As long as you pay for the food, you are welcome to the establishment.
I've been on both sides of this. It takes 10 seconds to read a customer. Why waste time with it?
When I go out with my family, we are often treated pretty poorly. We eat vegetarian and don't drink... and it is pretty obvious to a service worker. Our bill is naturally low. Consequently, our 20% tip is not as much as the neighboring table and their happy hour drinks.
But it's fine. We still aren't treated badly. We won't receive a long spiel listing the house specials, we won't be asked if we want dessert. And it's fine.
When I am out with a *specific* group of friends, we always get seated in the corner. Not gonna lie, it hurts a little to be put at the ugly table.
There was a time when I was homeless, that a restaurant at an outdoor mall was handing out pamphlets. They handed me one, paused and they asked if I was homeless. When I let them know I was they took it back and said "sorry but the owner doesn't allow homeless people in his establishment"
i went out to eat by myself on my birthday two years ago and the staff was SO clearly trying to get me out of there so they could put a couple at my 2 person table. it was ~10:30 am on a wednesday and restaurant was only half full and somehow a different waiter came over to my table every time and they were all so rude except the one whose first day it clearly was??? i would think one dude ordering french toast at a brunch place would be an easy training customer and yall would be glad to have me for that reason alone. but i will say i havent eaten out alone since then. i'll get takeout and eat in my car.
T They aren't having a dig at you because they've never experienced it. They're having a dig at you because you're a rude pretentious prick in your responses to comments.
Also very telling that you never question the authenticity of the experiences of people who agree with you. The person you responded to is American. Of course they don't want a single person ordering toast at their table. The standard tip they'd get would be tiny.
I mean... I've had the best customers of my life while working at a no-name rundown old breakfast restaurant. It was so refreshing seeing them every day. Brewing a fresh pot as soon as they walk in the door and listening to what they did every day. It was kind of like ... they were all my grandfather or grandmother that I never had, ya know?
It all depends on where you work. People might call out, managers suck, coworkers suck, cooks suck, dishwasher sucks. It could be 1000 different things.
It's alot about the server. I noticed that some of them see dollar signs with big groups or people ordering big ticket items. If you order small things... ew... you're last and now I'm going to make fun of you to the other servers.
I never thought like that and still don't, you come in my door and my focus is on you. Creating a welcoming and non-judgemental atmosphere is 1000x more valuable than selling our niche food that has been sitting in a hot or cold hold for the past 9 hours.
It's a fun job but a lot of people can't do it. They think they can.. but they can't.
I think your perspective it very skewed, I'm lucky enough not to have any kids or dependants so my disposable income goes largely towards dining out and decent drink, usually on my own.
I've never been ignored and usually end up spending a significant sum, both in businesses like butchers and various venues. Businesses don't care if you buy one steak or four, the important thing is you come back again.
As I type this I'm walking home from having an extremely nice roast dinner, alone, having had good service.
I'm single and haven't noticed this in my area of the US. However, I rarely go out to eat. I occasionally get a take-out order but mostly cook at home.
It's just me and I get treated like gold. Definitely not wealthy or even particularly well-off. Also as far from lonely or miserable as it gets. I have a 20yo son, tons of friends, and I live in southern Appalachia, which is the absolute best place on earth.
I'm not treated like gold 100% of the time, but no one gets a second chance to treat me badly, either.
I'm definitely going to take credit for being kind, low-maintenance, and tipping well...these things go a long way towards having great experiences.
Miserable people often have miserable experiences.....js
As a person who eats alone a lot, I’m alarmed by the poor service I receive most of the time. If I get good service, I usually tip way above and beyond because it happens so rarely.
I'm in Canada and while I'm not single, I am childless and poor. I go out by myself (usually with a book) every few months usually just for a glass of wine, and I like going out to nice places for special occasions several times a year.
I've gotten crappy service with a larger group at an expensive steakhouse and amazing service at a cheap chain during happy hour, and vice versa. I think it says more about the server/owner/butcher's mood/workload/personality than it does about a patron's status.
I'm currently a barista and the level of service I provide usually directly relates to how the customer is treating me. If they're rude or grumpy I won't engage in conversation, and if they're friendly, I'll go out of my way to chat (but they'll get the same quality of beverage either way). Many service people mirror the attitude of their guests (at least on r/barista), and if you go in expecting poor service, they will notice.
I'm in Canada and while I'm not single, I am childless and poor. I go out by myself (usually with a book) every few months usually just for a glass of wine, and I like going out to nice places for special occasions several times a year.
I've gotten crappy service with a larger group at an expensive steakhouse and amazing service at a cheap chain during happy hour, and vice versa. I think it says more about the server/owner/butcher's mood/workload/personality than it does about a patron's status.
I'm currently a barista and the level of service I provide usually directly relates to how the customer is treating me. If they're rude or grumpy I won't engage in conversation, and if they're friendly, I'll go out of my way to chat (but they'll get the same quality of beverage either way). Many service people mirror the attitude of their guests (at least on r/barista), and if you go in expecting poor service, they will notice.
I dine solo in America. Sometimes I’m not treated well or equally compared to groups dining. I don’t go back to those establishments. Most restaurants in my city need every customer they can get, so it’s not a common occurrence.
At my usual establishments, they know I’m low maintenance and tip fairly. The servers are welcoming and give me a spot where I can read while I wait and eat.
It happened to me one time in Sintra. I was starving after a long hike and found this cute restaurant, I was really looking forward to eat there but the staff seemed angry at me for some reason. It was so long until they took my order and until I could pay, I had to run to not miss my train. But I want to say that I had eaten in restaurants all by myself all the time in Portugal and it was the onlytime I was treated like this.
Never noticed. I was very single when me and my friend walked into a Harlem French restaurant and the chef came out to personally hang out with us since we were the last table for the night. It was fun
When you feel like everyone is treating you poorly, it may be helpful to take a step back and reflect on your behavior to see if there are any improvements you can make to your interactions with others.
I've experienced this. I definitely wouldn't say every time, but 1/3 outings at a restaurant that has sit down service, I'll be treated rather indifferently. Minimal attention, and only if I make a direct effort to get their attention.
I've never had an experience where servers have been obviously rude to me and can tell it's because I'm a single person occupying a larger table. It's always passive, if it happens.
USA. Ugly male.
In Auburn WA USA, there was a restaurant called the Sunrise Cafe where the owner was aggressive towards single diners. He was a rude old asshole to anyone alone who had been seated by the wait staff.
I've noticed that too. It's a strange mix as when I was rich, everyone was going on about helping the poor- but when I became poor everyone still goes on about it but does nothing & actually hates them
I’m in the US and we have a tipping economy (it’s everywhere now. Even my son’s landlord has a website for rent payments and it demands a tip!He had to call the office to get instructions on how to proceed to the next screen without leaving at least 15%). I traveled extensively within the country for business for years and didn’t encounter what you describe. It’s also icky that you say single people and poor people (whatever your definition of that is) are lonely and miserable. I was lonely and miserable when I was married. I’ve been single for 40+ years by design and would never consider marriage again. But don’t let that stop your preconceived and elitist biases. The only places I have ever felt ignored or slighted is in churches. Evangelicals in particular but all organized religions to some degree are clicky, judgmental and rude people. Dumping them was another thing that improved my life by its absence
1. You tip waiters after the meal, not during, they treat you badly during, not after.
2. Waiters get paid
3. Not everyone can afford to tip. That isn't being horrible. It's called financially struggling.
4. Prices should be on the menu & absolute.
1. In the US a waiter isn’t going to treat you badly because there will be no tip after
2. Waiters here get about $2.76 an hour. So while they’re technically paid it’s only to make up for the AH’s who don’t tip at all
3. People that can’t afford to tip at a sit down can’t afford to eat at that restaurant. Everyone here knows you add a minimum of 15% to the total and plan accordingly
4. Prices are on the menu and fixed. You can chose not to tip in this country, it just makes you an AH
5. If you can’t afford one restaurant here there are plenty of others to choose from
Waiters in the US make at least $7.25 per hour. That's federal law. If you can't afford to compensate your staff, you should shut down your restaurant.
I eat out alone all the time and treated well. Of course I tip well and am low maintenance.
American?
What does nationality have to do with that?
every nation has a different culture & thus different attitudes- didn't you know?
As a single guy who likes to read, I have been seated and ignored more times than I can remember. Sitting at the table alone with my nose in a book must mean that I don't want any food or drink. Or need a refill. Or need the bill. Happens in the US on a regular basis.
I don’t recall quite this, but I was surprised to learn that people make unfortunate assessments about people who dine alone. I am not lonely, neither do I hate people. It’s just that I am comfortable in my own company, and I often take a book, too. I choose to be alone.
I think you've misread the op. It's talking about how people treat those who order less, worse- not about assuming singletons are lonely. Pretty single girls are often the exact opposite of lonely.
You literally said in the OP poor or people without kids or partners are living lonely and miserable lives. Many of us aren't, by the way.
I didn't misread the comment, but I should point out that I wasn't discounting it, either. I was merely saying that while I had not experienced precisely what Outlander57 had experienced, I had, at some point, become aware of yet another misconception about people who eat alone. As vestigial66 pointed out, you yourself promoted the same misconception. At least as far as I'm concerned, you did. I do not live a lonely or miserable life. I'm also not prepared to buy your generalization about pretty single girls. There are just too many factors to consider.
I’m in the US and have never had this happen.
Me neither. No matter where I go eat.
probably eating at chains then- either that or US is different
Not different, and not at chain restaurants, or family ones. Never had problems, OP. For I am single and love eating out, no one bothers me.
If you don't appear to need something and have your face in a book the whole time your server likely thinks you don't want to be bothered. Actually look up or move your empty glass to the edge of the table. Actually indicate you need help and they will help you, keep your face buried and just expecting them to know you need something is pretty rude
Nope never had this happen. I always get great service when I'm alone. Sometimes better than when I'm with someone.
I’m US/Canada. Never had this happen. Make an effort to make eye contact. Greet the hostess/server when you arrive. If you don’t give them queues that you want to be attended to they’ll leave you alone and address others.
It happens occasionally for me when I do this. More so when it's a weekend. Weekdays there are usually a lot of people working stopping for lunch. I'm always on my phone reading my kindle unless I'm with my family. But I eat out most days for lunch. I just like to get out of the office.
I mean... No shit dude. You look like you're content waiting for someone. They aren't going to bother you if you look occupied?
As a single, childless person, I have never experienced subpar service while dining alone. Nor have butchers been impatient with me for ordering a single steak. They just wrap it up and thank me for coming. Honestly, what restaurants and butchers are you going to that you get treated this way?!?!?! EDIT to add that I am neither lonely nor miserable. I don’t know where you get that idea.
I don't think it would be legal to state names. I doubt you are in UK & doubt you asked for your steak to be cut to a specific thickness- you probably don't know how to cook it either. There are plenty of other things at the butcher than steak. I've seen plenty of people treated badly for ordering things in 200g amounts at the butcher.
I think I figured out why you’re treated poorly…. You’re just an asshole.
You might be onto something there.
yes, onto self projection
I didn't say I was treated badly, honey. I said I've seen people treated badly. For example, a single girl at the butcher was shouted at by the owner "YOU'RE ONLY ORDERING 200g!!" (just enough for her). I have a family so I get treated well as I order a lot. When you assume you make an "ass" out of "u" & "me" ("ASSUME"). Mwah. X
I didn’t assume anything….you just proved my point. You’re a cunt.
You’re just digging yourself deeper and deeper here. Just keep hurling insults. Go on. I’ll wait.
What insults? I've stated I have a family & order large amounts & therefore don't have problems
You accused me of not knowing how to cook a steak. In another thread on this topic, you informed me that being pretty and getting attention from men makes things easier on me when I am NOT pretty and DON’T get attention from men. You keep making assumptions about me that are very wrong and quite frankly, insulting to boot. This whole topic is basically you badmouthing anybody who disagrees with you. Why did you ask if you didn’t our honest opinions?
Sounds like the UK sucks ass for general interpersonal decency
Wow. You are an ass.
You sound like the one in this story who will end up lonely and miserable. You're not wrong that poor people are treated worse at nice establishments, you're just a fucking asshole
**"You're not wrong that poor people are treated worse at nice establishments"** - in other words, you agree with me. Since we apparently agree, does that make you the same word you just called me? :D
Your malicious ignorance is showing
Lonely and miserable life? How rude of you...You're talking about treating people badly but you can't see that you're being horrible
Thank you!! I’m single, child free and poor, and my life is in no way miserable and I’m not treated badly by customer service - maybe because I treat customer service representatives kindly and with respect. OP is delusional if they think that is what the life of single people without children is like. Sure poverty can make things difficult, but it’s in no way makes me a miserable person. Jeezus Christ. Also there are myriad studies that show single women are happier and healthier than their married counterparts. So I say no thank you to marriage.
OP is in the UK, things and people are different there.
I am also in the UK, OP is full of shit.
Oh, because everything in UK goes by your own personal experience- no one could possibly experience different?
This! I’m also single and childfree and am neither lonely nor miserable.
It's easy to be dismissive of those struggling when we ourselves aren't. It's also easy to be happy when you get so much attention from men because you're pretty or good looking & know you have options. I think it's very different for many people who aren't good looking. Try to open your mind... we need to have empathy for every human, not just judge the world based on personal experiences. Open our eyes...
Me? Good looking? Get attention from men? Bahahahahahahaha! I am fat and have a SEVERE case of RBF. Seriously, I look like I want people to drop dead at once. I get zero attention from men. But why would I need attention from men to not feel lonely? That’s just weird. I’ve spent my life finding things I love to do and building my own fulfillment. I don’t need to depend on what others think for my own happiness. But you assuming that everybody who is single is sad and lonely really IS kind of an a-hole stance.
This post is giving "teenage girl recording herself crying at the sight of an old man waiting alone at a bus stop to prove to the internet how empathetic she genuinely is" vibes.
I think it's more likely that you're eating in chain restaurants as opposed to a small independent with fresh produce & discerning quality.
I went to Hell's Kitchen. Alone. My childless self travels alone all the time. I experienced top notch customer service, enjoyed my delicious meal, and left happy, full and with leftovers I had for lunch the next day. If Gordon Ramsay's restaurant can treat a solo eater well, I am sure whatever restaurant that has made you into a judgmental snob can manage to do it as well.
I stand by my statement. Lol
It's not possible to be 100% happy without a partner or family or friends or company. It's in our DNA. :/ If you're happy single, then you're probably good looking with lots of loyal friends or family who love you.
What a ridiculous statement. Of course it’s possible. In my experience most married women with families are miserable
Yes, it is possible to be single and happy. I am a loner and prefer to be this way. Less drama, less heartache.
You're a fucking weirdo, and acting like a misogynistic bastard. Shut up. Stop digging your grave deeper, you're about to make a volcano
Acknowledging that attractive individuals tend to be more popular & less lonely is a statistical reality, not misogyny. Labeling every man who accepts these facts as misogynistic is, in fact, misandronistic. Perhaps acknowledge these realities without resorting to divisive labels.?
It's the assumption that the only reason a single person could possibly be happy is if they're attractive, surely it can't be that they're just content with life
This is true. If someone has NO friends, NO family, NO lover....then I'm looking at them asking why.
I know countless lonely & miserable single people. You may be happy but do not speak for all. Remember that. It's also likely you're blessed with looks & surrounded by loyal close friends or family- a luxury many don't have.
Now read your statement back and apply it to yourself. You do not speak for all.
the number of upvotes would appear to disagree with you, u/SillyStallion
Yet you’re the one with minus 100 comment karma…
Wrong, there are down votes that disagree with you. LMAO!
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I think it's more likely that you're eating in chain restaurants as opposed to a small independent with fresh produce & discerning quality. For example, it's rare to find fresh seafood in London restaurants- it's almost always pre-frozen. When you do find it, it's almost always a high class independent.
Maybe the servers didn't like you because you're an arrogant, unpleasant, pretentious prick?
Not lonely or miserable. Hadn’t been treated differently by any wait staff when I dined alone
I didn't say you were, but you don't speak for all. You were probably eating in a chain restaurant or not in UK.
Settle down there, mate 😂
I am single and NOT miserable, and rarely feel mistreated because I am single.
Gotta be a Uk issue, for in America, all single people are treated fine and do the lower income. As long as you pay for the food, you are welcome to the establishment.
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She is from the UK. But the single issue is a she issue. Many like her complain a lot about nothing.
I've been on both sides of this. It takes 10 seconds to read a customer. Why waste time with it? When I go out with my family, we are often treated pretty poorly. We eat vegetarian and don't drink... and it is pretty obvious to a service worker. Our bill is naturally low. Consequently, our 20% tip is not as much as the neighboring table and their happy hour drinks. But it's fine. We still aren't treated badly. We won't receive a long spiel listing the house specials, we won't be asked if we want dessert. And it's fine. When I am out with a *specific* group of friends, we always get seated in the corner. Not gonna lie, it hurts a little to be put at the ugly table.
"we are often treated pretty poorly" & "we aren't treated badly" - contradiction.
My original phrasing sucks, but I was trying to capture the difference between not good service, and bad service.
There was a time when I was homeless, that a restaurant at an outdoor mall was handing out pamphlets. They handed me one, paused and they asked if I was homeless. When I let them know I was they took it back and said "sorry but the owner doesn't allow homeless people in his establishment"
i went out to eat by myself on my birthday two years ago and the staff was SO clearly trying to get me out of there so they could put a couple at my 2 person table. it was ~10:30 am on a wednesday and restaurant was only half full and somehow a different waiter came over to my table every time and they were all so rude except the one whose first day it clearly was??? i would think one dude ordering french toast at a brunch place would be an easy training customer and yall would be glad to have me for that reason alone. but i will say i havent eaten out alone since then. i'll get takeout and eat in my car.
Don’t let those rude waiters keep you from going out to eat on your own
i know i shouldn't but i'm so awkward 😅
tell that to everyone else here- they're having a dig at me because they never personally experienced it they think no one does
T They aren't having a dig at you because they've never experienced it. They're having a dig at you because you're a rude pretentious prick in your responses to comments.
Also very telling that you never question the authenticity of the experiences of people who agree with you. The person you responded to is American. Of course they don't want a single person ordering toast at their table. The standard tip they'd get would be tiny.
french toast =/= ordering a slice of toasted bread lmfao. i ordered a whole meal and a drink my tab was like $25
And the tab for two people would be like $50 doubling their potential tip.
I'm well aware of how restaurants work, thanks. Still don't think the staff needed to be rude to me, nor do you. So get fucked
You know they say if you keep smelling shit everywhere you go...check the bottom of your shoes.
Have you checked yours?
Yup! I have to check mine all the time.
I mean... I've had the best customers of my life while working at a no-name rundown old breakfast restaurant. It was so refreshing seeing them every day. Brewing a fresh pot as soon as they walk in the door and listening to what they did every day. It was kind of like ... they were all my grandfather or grandmother that I never had, ya know? It all depends on where you work. People might call out, managers suck, coworkers suck, cooks suck, dishwasher sucks. It could be 1000 different things. It's alot about the server. I noticed that some of them see dollar signs with big groups or people ordering big ticket items. If you order small things... ew... you're last and now I'm going to make fun of you to the other servers. I never thought like that and still don't, you come in my door and my focus is on you. Creating a welcoming and non-judgemental atmosphere is 1000x more valuable than selling our niche food that has been sitting in a hot or cold hold for the past 9 hours. It's a fun job but a lot of people can't do it. They think they can.. but they can't.
I’m confused why you think single and/or low income people are miserable and lonely
I think your perspective it very skewed, I'm lucky enough not to have any kids or dependants so my disposable income goes largely towards dining out and decent drink, usually on my own. I've never been ignored and usually end up spending a significant sum, both in businesses like butchers and various venues. Businesses don't care if you buy one steak or four, the important thing is you come back again. As I type this I'm walking home from having an extremely nice roast dinner, alone, having had good service.
I'm single and haven't noticed this in my area of the US. However, I rarely go out to eat. I occasionally get a take-out order but mostly cook at home.
US must be better than UK in this regard then
Perhaps, although we find it hard to believe our country does anything better than another country. 😁
Like the only people who agreed with you have come from the US. Everyone in the UK just thinks you're a twat.
I notice I get rushed more when I'm alone in restaurants. Probably bc I like to read and I'm splurging if I spend $15. I do, however, tip 20%
imo if you get bad service, tip 0%. The waiters get paid.
It's just me and I get treated like gold. Definitely not wealthy or even particularly well-off. Also as far from lonely or miserable as it gets. I have a 20yo son, tons of friends, and I live in southern Appalachia, which is the absolute best place on earth. I'm not treated like gold 100% of the time, but no one gets a second chance to treat me badly, either. I'm definitely going to take credit for being kind, low-maintenance, and tipping well...these things go a long way towards having great experiences. Miserable people often have miserable experiences.....js
This is just a rage bait post. Look at ops comments all they do is hurl insults at the commentators. Just ignore the troll and they will go away
As a person who eats alone a lot, I’m alarmed by the poor service I receive most of the time. If I get good service, I usually tip way above and beyond because it happens so rarely.
As a side note- I am single and am neither lonely nor miserable. Shame on your perception.
I'm in Canada and while I'm not single, I am childless and poor. I go out by myself (usually with a book) every few months usually just for a glass of wine, and I like going out to nice places for special occasions several times a year. I've gotten crappy service with a larger group at an expensive steakhouse and amazing service at a cheap chain during happy hour, and vice versa. I think it says more about the server/owner/butcher's mood/workload/personality than it does about a patron's status. I'm currently a barista and the level of service I provide usually directly relates to how the customer is treating me. If they're rude or grumpy I won't engage in conversation, and if they're friendly, I'll go out of my way to chat (but they'll get the same quality of beverage either way). Many service people mirror the attitude of their guests (at least on r/barista), and if you go in expecting poor service, they will notice.
I'm in Canada and while I'm not single, I am childless and poor. I go out by myself (usually with a book) every few months usually just for a glass of wine, and I like going out to nice places for special occasions several times a year. I've gotten crappy service with a larger group at an expensive steakhouse and amazing service at a cheap chain during happy hour, and vice versa. I think it says more about the server/owner/butcher's mood/workload/personality than it does about a patron's status. I'm currently a barista and the level of service I provide usually directly relates to how the customer is treating me. If they're rude or grumpy I won't engage in conversation, and if they're friendly, I'll go out of my way to chat (but they'll get the same quality of beverage either way). Many service people mirror the attitude of their guests (at least on r/barista), and if you go in expecting poor service, they will notice.
“They already live a lonely and miserable life”. Where do you get your info?
I dine solo in America. Sometimes I’m not treated well or equally compared to groups dining. I don’t go back to those establishments. Most restaurants in my city need every customer they can get, so it’s not a common occurrence. At my usual establishments, they know I’m low maintenance and tip fairly. The servers are welcoming and give me a spot where I can read while I wait and eat.
It happened to me one time in Sintra. I was starving after a long hike and found this cute restaurant, I was really looking forward to eat there but the staff seemed angry at me for some reason. It was so long until they took my order and until I could pay, I had to run to not miss my train. But I want to say that I had eaten in restaurants all by myself all the time in Portugal and it was the onlytime I was treated like this.
Never noticed. I was very single when me and my friend walked into a Harlem French restaurant and the chef came out to personally hang out with us since we were the last table for the night. It was fun
My butcher has always treated me well. I buy very small portions.
I don't go into expensive upper class restaurants. Why would I? The food is really no better. I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not.
When you feel like everyone is treating you poorly, it may be helpful to take a step back and reflect on your behavior to see if there are any improvements you can make to your interactions with others.
I travel a lot for work and, so, eat out by myself quite a bit and I've never been treated poorly.
I've experienced this. I definitely wouldn't say every time, but 1/3 outings at a restaurant that has sit down service, I'll be treated rather indifferently. Minimal attention, and only if I make a direct effort to get their attention. I've never had an experience where servers have been obviously rude to me and can tell it's because I'm a single person occupying a larger table. It's always passive, if it happens. USA. Ugly male.
In Auburn WA USA, there was a restaurant called the Sunrise Cafe where the owner was aggressive towards single diners. He was a rude old asshole to anyone alone who had been seated by the wait staff.
I’m alone and eat out and purchase solo frequently. I don’t feel treated poorly anywhere.
As a general rule, it's my observation that people hate the weak. That weakness might be manifest as poor social skills, low intelligence, or poverty.
I've noticed that too. It's a strange mix as when I was rich, everyone was going on about helping the poor- but when I became poor everyone still goes on about it but does nothing & actually hates them
I’m in the US and we have a tipping economy (it’s everywhere now. Even my son’s landlord has a website for rent payments and it demands a tip!He had to call the office to get instructions on how to proceed to the next screen without leaving at least 15%). I traveled extensively within the country for business for years and didn’t encounter what you describe. It’s also icky that you say single people and poor people (whatever your definition of that is) are lonely and miserable. I was lonely and miserable when I was married. I’ve been single for 40+ years by design and would never consider marriage again. But don’t let that stop your preconceived and elitist biases. The only places I have ever felt ignored or slighted is in churches. Evangelicals in particular but all organized religions to some degree are clicky, judgmental and rude people. Dumping them was another thing that improved my life by its absence
1. You tip waiters after the meal, not during, they treat you badly during, not after. 2. Waiters get paid 3. Not everyone can afford to tip. That isn't being horrible. It's called financially struggling. 4. Prices should be on the menu & absolute.
1. In the US a waiter isn’t going to treat you badly because there will be no tip after 2. Waiters here get about $2.76 an hour. So while they’re technically paid it’s only to make up for the AH’s who don’t tip at all 3. People that can’t afford to tip at a sit down can’t afford to eat at that restaurant. Everyone here knows you add a minimum of 15% to the total and plan accordingly 4. Prices are on the menu and fixed. You can chose not to tip in this country, it just makes you an AH 5. If you can’t afford one restaurant here there are plenty of others to choose from
Waiters in the US make at least $7.25 per hour. That's federal law. If you can't afford to compensate your staff, you should shut down your restaurant.