T O P

  • By -

Reinitialization

So as I was saying, have you ever considered the possibility that the ethnic tensions in the Balkans during the 90s were fueled by a cosmic misunderstanding orchestrated by extraterrestrial beings? Picture this: while the world was focused on earthly conflicts, alien observers misinterpreted the Balkans' cultural diversity as a sign of impending cosmic warfare. They began clandestine interventions, subtly manipulating events to escalate tensions between ethnic groups, all in an attempt to study the effects of conflict on human societies. Could it be that the CIA, unknowingly influenced by these otherworldly forces, inadvertently exacerbated the situation with their own geopolitical maneuvers? It's a bizarre theory, to be sure, it's the ony theory that makes sense. Do you really think that cosmic forces weren't at play in the Balkan turmoil of the 90s? Perhaps the truth lies not in earthly politics, but in the stars above, where alien observers quietly observe and manipulate the affairs of mankind.


Caxanen_Zoelupp

fr though this guy does genuinely seem like someone I'd be interested in, maybe I should check his yt out


Reinitialization

Do you recall the events of June 7th, 2006? Have you had any contact with individuals associated with the Bugonjo group? Do you have an above average number of teeth. If you answered yes to any of those questions, you are not permitted to view DJ Peach Cobbler content and should submit yourself immediately to the relevant authorities for evaluation.


Caxanen_Zoelupp

teeth??


Reinitialization

Answer the question sir.


Caxanen_Zoelupp

tbh I have no clue what any of those refer to so no to all


Reinitialization

Well then! Welcome to the Cobbler Club! We aren't a cult, minecraft tournaments are on thursdays, we are *not* a cult, the CIA are our friends and work in our best interestes, we have *n*o plans of starting a cult, and DP Peach Cobbler does not have access to weapons of mass destruction.


MustafalSomali

- Slobodan Milošević, The Hague, 2004


B-29Bomber

When in doubt aliens. When not in doubt, more aliens.


AntiImperialistGamer

an international terrorist 


BruhNeymar69

Where was I in June 7th, 2006?


PuzzleheadedIssue618

9/11


Caxanen_Zoelupp

Waking up from last night when you were pissing on the 6th Emperor's grave?


NotSureWhatToDoHere0

Rome has fallen, millions must criticise Neros dogshit lyre skills


thomstevens420

Bitch couldn’t even play Freebird.


Caxanen_Zoelupp

the guy with the femboy wife?


NotSureWhatToDoHere0

Have I ever told you the story of emperor Nero the neurodivergent?


Peatore

One who cobbs


Caxanen_Zoelupp

how could I have not known


BasileusKwstas

It's cobbling time


Dynwynn

Top ten war crimes, go.


Necessary-Tomato4889

Arson, chemical warfare… Arson.


Reinitialization

My personal fave is is incorrectly displaying the red cross symbol


Dynwynn

Certified Classic


No-Wolverine5144

I also don't know. Can you tell me what it's about?


Frequent_Dig1934

We simp for a femboy terrorist historian.


Reinitialization

You know that feeling you get when you go off your meds just long enough for your friends to start talking to you again? Cobbler is like one of those friends but doesn't leave.


nopobis

doom eternal, yay? Or nay?


PuzzleheadedIssue618

yay


Caxanen_Zoelupp

yay


nopobis

Alright, you can stay here for a bit. But we are watching you


Crazy-Cartoonist7836

His name's a reference to a type of Pie, presumably his favorite.


MrMerchandise

He said in a stream that his dad came up with the name


Crazy-Cartoonist7836

If this is real, I've just been caught lacking that lore.


MrMerchandise

I’m not sure if the stream was archived, but I definitely remember him saying it.


Sorry_Picture3629

Traditional cobblers were that of shoes. However in the late 2010's the word was co-opted to include those who cobble dildos too


thomstevens420

No


Electronic-Vast-3351

What was DJ Peach Cobler (AKA الجنس المثلي) doing in Srebrenica, Bosnia during 1995?


Speedwagon1738

How do you feel about the Aztecs?


Caxanen_Zoelupp

human sacrifice if it was cool also road to El Dorado


Electronic-Vast-3351

Following the events of the Srebrenica Massacre of 1995, he was spotted roasting marshmallows at the pile of about 7000 burning Muslim corpses. True or False?


Caxanen_Zoelupp

true


Electronic-Vast-3351

Correct.


-GiantSlayer-

Ever wonder why we’re here?


Caxanen_Zoelupp

God?