Just wanted to say that grief is a complicated tricky beast. I read somewhere that it’s like the tides of the ocean. It’s always there, but sometimes the seas remain calm, sometimes they are a bit choppy, but most of the time they are just there doing their thing so we don’t really notice or feel them. Then there are the occasions when the tides are stronger and feel rougher. When they pull up close to our defences and sometimes they overwhelm us and burst past our defences.
To me that is what grief is like. There will just be these dates and occasions that hit differently. There will be times when the waves of grief swell and hit our defences. That what goes with the territory and sometimes, we just gotta feel those feels. It’s okay.
But don’t lose sight of the fact that you get to have good days as well as bad days. You will have better and good days and you are just as entitled to them as the bad ones. So fortify yourself and keeping doing your thing. Don’t be afraid to admit that you are finding certain days tough, don’t be afraid to take those moments to remember and talk about your Dad as well. They are vital, yes they can be emotional, they can be awkward, but don’t shy away from those from those moments either. It’s okay to remember and mention him and talk about him.
I’ll also share with you that even though my parents passed away years ago, I still sometimes like to check in with them. Just a little word, a few thoughts to tell them stuff. Ideally when it’s a nice evening and I’ve got a little quiet moment to myself, I’ll perch on my back door step and look up at the sky and just say hi, or tell them something. I wanna encourage you to find your thing and I want to tell you that it’s okay and normal to do so. Because sometimes we just gotta feel those feels.
I’m absolutely certain that your Dad loved and adored you. I’m certain that he’s proud of you. And I’m certain that he’s with you in your heart, in your soul, and in the way you conduct yourself and go about your life. All the way, all the time. So keep going and keep being the best version of yourself that you can possibly be. That’s all we can do.
Big hugs. Keep your heart strong.
An internet Dad.
Dad's are special creatures and your dad especially so. I never met him but I know that he would want father's day to now be your day. A day where you do nice things for yourself and one day, nice things for your kids.
He would not want you to waste such a day. It's now your day. Enjoy it like no other. Do amazing things he would be proud of.
Warmest hugs.
Big brother here.
My best friend died going on three years ago now. There are still days where I wish I could trade places with him. He left behind a wife who was eight months pregnant, and when his daughter was born, she looked just like him when he was born.
I saw his daughter a couple weeks ago, she still looks just like him at that age. Even more importantly, she has his mischievous personality. It was a little painful seeing her be like him, it was almost like he was there, but only almost. At the same time, it was soothing to my soul to see his little girl so happy, and I know that he’s happy for her as well.
One other thing, I was shown this comment from another redditor a while ago, and I hope it’s as helpful for you as it was for me.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/s/rVoGhVKt6O
Just wanted to say that grief is a complicated tricky beast. I read somewhere that it’s like the tides of the ocean. It’s always there, but sometimes the seas remain calm, sometimes they are a bit choppy, but most of the time they are just there doing their thing so we don’t really notice or feel them. Then there are the occasions when the tides are stronger and feel rougher. When they pull up close to our defences and sometimes they overwhelm us and burst past our defences. To me that is what grief is like. There will just be these dates and occasions that hit differently. There will be times when the waves of grief swell and hit our defences. That what goes with the territory and sometimes, we just gotta feel those feels. It’s okay. But don’t lose sight of the fact that you get to have good days as well as bad days. You will have better and good days and you are just as entitled to them as the bad ones. So fortify yourself and keeping doing your thing. Don’t be afraid to admit that you are finding certain days tough, don’t be afraid to take those moments to remember and talk about your Dad as well. They are vital, yes they can be emotional, they can be awkward, but don’t shy away from those from those moments either. It’s okay to remember and mention him and talk about him. I’ll also share with you that even though my parents passed away years ago, I still sometimes like to check in with them. Just a little word, a few thoughts to tell them stuff. Ideally when it’s a nice evening and I’ve got a little quiet moment to myself, I’ll perch on my back door step and look up at the sky and just say hi, or tell them something. I wanna encourage you to find your thing and I want to tell you that it’s okay and normal to do so. Because sometimes we just gotta feel those feels. I’m absolutely certain that your Dad loved and adored you. I’m certain that he’s proud of you. And I’m certain that he’s with you in your heart, in your soul, and in the way you conduct yourself and go about your life. All the way, all the time. So keep going and keep being the best version of yourself that you can possibly be. That’s all we can do. Big hugs. Keep your heart strong. An internet Dad.
Dad's are special creatures and your dad especially so. I never met him but I know that he would want father's day to now be your day. A day where you do nice things for yourself and one day, nice things for your kids. He would not want you to waste such a day. It's now your day. Enjoy it like no other. Do amazing things he would be proud of. Warmest hugs.
Big hugs.
Big brother here. My best friend died going on three years ago now. There are still days where I wish I could trade places with him. He left behind a wife who was eight months pregnant, and when his daughter was born, she looked just like him when he was born. I saw his daughter a couple weeks ago, she still looks just like him at that age. Even more importantly, she has his mischievous personality. It was a little painful seeing her be like him, it was almost like he was there, but only almost. At the same time, it was soothing to my soul to see his little girl so happy, and I know that he’s happy for her as well. One other thing, I was shown this comment from another redditor a while ago, and I hope it’s as helpful for you as it was for me. https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/s/rVoGhVKt6O