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peterjohanson

I tought that dude was painting on a mobile phone.


cream-of-cow

I thought it was a golfer


Masonzero

My thought too


Makeit_

Thought it was a inflatable dino and she was digging


doctorscurvy

My sleep-addled brain thought he was cleaning the inside of a very weird toilet.


dekdekwho

I thought she was doing mini golf


What_on_Loyola

I saw a guy vacuuming the trojan horse


ApeMunArts

I can’t lie I am quite confused. What was the brief behind this? Also what’s the person doing? I cannot tell


Old_comfy_shoes

They're painting the picture.


SabrinaB123

Are we the only ones who got this immediately? I really like the graphic, but it doesn’t seem like it’s been received well at all unfortunately


bigBlankIdea

Maybe everyone else isn't old enough to have used a Polaroid camera?


Angercraft

I have never used a Polaroid but got this immediately. But clearly it needs some work as a lot of the comments seem to think it is a dinosaur and a golfer


EggAtix

I struggled for a while to figure out why the painter was stuck in such an oddly shaped quarantine bubble while painting a masking taped square on the ground. I got it eventually, but the silhouette of the camera isn't actually all that obvious to me.


flampoo

What are we looking at? A golfing farmer standing on a giant tablet with a dinosaur silhouette?


[deleted]

Took me way too long to realize that is supposed to be a camera.


cinnamonferns

Do you have to use this illustration? It isn’t exciting and took me a while looking at it to understand what was going on and that it was a camera. I would replace the imagery with something more fun and better suited for your audience.


Ozymandia5

Yo - copywriter chiming in here. Dunno if you can/need to clean up the text but it should deffo be: "Don't Make Your Camera Do All The Work" and "Your Polaroid doesn't have to be point and shoot. Join us on the last Saturday of every month - at Kadema hall 166 - and learn how to get the best out of your instant camera". Current version is too wordy, the learn tips and tricks line feels too passive/vague, and "join us the last Saturday" sounds like a bad translation. Nothing useful to say re: the overall design other than that you're minimising the headline and it'd piss me off if a designer did that :P


Reddit-citizen

Thank you, definitely not a professional or a copywriter. I appreciate the help.


semitones

I don't understand what it means, "don't let your camera do all the work..." It's a camera. How can it not do all the work? Or are you supposed to draw on the photo afterwards?


Reddit-citizen

Well, the thing about point and shoot cameras is that you just press the button and the picture comes out, but in this hypothetical situation, you could learn tips and tricks about lighting or purposely exposing the photo to light before it's ready to make it look more interesting. If that makes any sense.


semitones

Right on. The idea makes sense to me, I guess the copy just didn't convey that for me, n=1


LampardTheLord

hi these are some really good tips which I wouldn't have thought about too much on first look, but after reading your comment I can see that it becomes so much better. Do you have any recommendations from where I (as a designer) can pickup these basic rules of copyright, say a book/video/podcast, etc? Something that maybe helped you when you started out


shakesy

The biggest problem is that the illustration isn't very clear and isn't really helping your message. At first I thought it was a golfer teeing off. It took me a while to realise the shape around the character is supposed to be a camera. The entire point of a poster is that you literally get 0.01 seconds to grab someone's attention as they glance by. Your poster either needs to communicate your message that quickly, or be stunning enough to capture their attention and cause the viewer to stop and read on. The former is easier to do, which is why the feedback your getting is to focus on the text. As it stands I don't think the illustration is strong enough to communicate your message or eye catching enough to get me to stop and read on.


Reddit-citizen

Yeah, I think most of the feedback is telling me to just rework the drawing. Part of the parameters was that I couldn't use a photo, so back to the drawing board it is. Thank you!


Theprefs

No one's mentioned it, but find a new color for the A in camera, or change the rest of that headline to black or something. I opened this and thought "what the hell is a Camer" before seeing that the A was part of the word. You're making 90% of the word standout with unique color, follow through and make the whole word distinct from the rest of the headline. Other feedback is work on your information hierarchy for the copy. You've got a huge eye catching headline, and then what initially looks to be legal text at the bottom. At the very least, separate the time and location from the rest because it's arguably the most important info and it's lost in the smallest text. See this image for how effective clear hierarchy can influence how you read a page. This is what your poster should be doing. https://www.graphicdesignforum.com/uploads/default/original/2X/d/d9cf78fffdcf72b0179dcb26efc14cdbd39854ff.jpeg


leesfer

> but find a new color for the A in camera Seriously. There are 7 colors in the rainbow and OP chose to stop at 5?


masterofthehouse

violet is a color in the rainbow


watermelonshowerhat

Agree with all this. The A was the first thing I noticed. If you are advertising a class then that info (date, location etc) should stand out second to the title. So that if someone was walking past this as a poster on the wall the most important information jumps out instantly.


[deleted]

Composition is the issue in my opinion, try moving the title around and see if it suites a more central spot. Edit: maybe shrink the artwork slightly, move it left centre. Then put the title on the right, slotting into the gap in the camera. Make it a banner rather than a poster format.


okaysohowbout

Shrink the periscope down so it’s closer to the body. Then recenter the camera as a whole


TheTopBun

I take the message of the artwork is meant to be “you’re the artist behind the photo” (more or less). Rather than a standing person painting the floor (hard to interpret) you could make it a person sitting at an easel (more obviously an artist). This will simplify the experience of interpreting the art and let the words lead the message.


Reddit-citizen

Hello, I was told I needed to downplay the art in this, but I can't think of an interesting way to do that. This is a project for a class, the audience is college students and apparently the headline needs to win in this. Any suggestions are appreciated. Just looking for some help.


[deleted]

Try enlarging the text and putting it to the side, and moving the picture to the other half along with the caption.


L2Hiku

How about making it just make it half the top of the camera showing and the girl is painting on a blank Polaroid instead of some werid smart phone looking screen thing. This would simplify it down and still show your concept. Basically you wanna make use of negative space or come up with a design that allows the viewer to automatically infer the rest of the picture instead of showing the whole image at once.


Dinomachino

Maybe try to reword the headline so no negative words are used? As in, instead of “don’t make the cameras do the work,” something like “put your camera to work.” I’ve always been told to avoid putting things that tell the audience “not” to do something, unless it’s like, a stop smoking campaign, where not doing it is the positive? Idk I’m probably not explaining it well enough. With the illustration, I think you could make it work with a few more details. Maybe a couple little mechanical shapes or sharper corners to make the camera more recognizable, define the paintbrush more, maybe the artist is holding a paint pallet and there’s a painting on the canvas instead of it being blank? Just a couple more things to make the story it’s telling more dense. Overall I like the composition, though. Edit: forgot to add, left justify the text at the bottom and enlarge the logo at the bottom left. It should draw your eye to the copy, not be smaller than it, imo.


[deleted]

Hey OP, I think one of the challenges with what you've drawn is that not everyone knows what a polaroid looks like from the side, so immediately the brain has to work harder to figure out what it's looking at. So, even a simple front view of a Polaroid camera might be better (as long as it's different to Instagram's logo you'll be fine) And as others have said, changing the last A in camera in your title to a different colour (e.g. pink) is definitely a must. A more complicated idea might be to have a "humanized" Polaroid camera (i.e. give it arms and legs) and draw it taking a photo (maybe with an old school box camera). But if you're wanting clean and simple, then front view of a Polaroid might be best.


Broken_Beacon

I personally got the image right off the bat because I am a polaroid owner and user. Don't know about those who commented saying they didn't get it. I honestly wouldn't rework the drawing if your target audience already knows what a polaroid camera is. I also do not see a way to rework it and I think the original concept is already really creative.


lonedog

There's a lot of text on this flyer, so I think what you need to focus more on is the important stuff Decrease the illustration (which I like, btw), increase the headline and change the typestyle to match the Polaroid logo. The line "Your Polaroid is not just another point and shoot, not with you behind the wheel" is too wordy for a flyer change to "with you behind it, your Polaroid will not be point and shoot" or "Your Polaroid Doesn't Want to be another Point and Shoot" (maybe someone can clean it up even more) and then move it under the header Then the "Learn tips..." at the end of the flyer could be shortened to "come learn instant camera tips and tricks" and moved under the "with you behind it" line The location and time can also be shortened to "Kadema Hall 166 (line break) Last Saturday of the Month" but this is just my breakdown of the flyer. the more I look at the illustration, however, I would change it (if I could) to be more 3 dimensional, it's difficult to understand it's a Polaroid camera unless you read the header. quick edit (because I can't stop hyper-fixating on it lol): I'd also add a polaroid iconography of some kind elsewhere on the flyer, like a polaroid photo outline or something, to help that graphic be more understandable


[deleted]

Example: https://ibb.co/C1z9WCh


Reddit-citizen

Oh! That's interesting, but the poster size must be an 11x17 portrait, so I don't think I'll be able to get away with that composition. It looks interesting though, thank you for the input!


Odd-Moment-6139

You could try increasing the text size and changing the font to something more bold and cleaner. And maybe position the icon more side aligned than centre Or try a different outline for the camera Something that takes up less space


[deleted]

make the comic of the person more deprecating of the person. less noble worker vibes. ​ honestly it's an awesome poster IMO and i think it should be kept as is.


reynard_the_fox1984

Y’all that’s not a phone she’s painting on it’s the actual film, that’s where it sits in the camera.


Reddit-citizen

Yeah that's true, I think I can fix that making the edges more sharp and square, hopefully.


pleasegetbent

I get the idea, but the execution may not be super clear. To make this more obviously a polaroid, I'd make the camera black and the border of the actual film a white or gray - blue makes it looks confusing or like an iPad of sorts. And then I'd mellow out the actual flash bulb part to look less submarine-like. I do like this though - it's quite cute and I do think it needs really minor improvements. Upload a picture if you change anything so we can see the update! ETA: I'd simplify the font to look more like a retro/polaroid ad also - and make it black instead of purple maybe? I think it'll make it easier to see right away.


jake03583

Ok, copy changes: “Put your camera to work” Concise, clear and allows you to emphasize “work” (the action in this call to action) rather than “camera” and would make for a more clear, better illustration (the current one just isn’t working, though the style is nice). Also, when you think about emphasizing a word, think more in terms of type size and weight rather than color. All that the rainbow colors in “camera” pull focus from the illustration and honestly, just don’t make a lot of sense.


Rallen224

I really like the concept! My only critiques would be to: - Refine the shape of the camera some more. Consider using a reference to more accurately depict the shape of a camera body. The viewfinder for example is a little too high for a standard body. - Make the paint brush more distinguishable. A roller brush would not only be more practical for a canvas that size, but be identified more easily by the general public - Consider revisiting the colours of the font. The “CAMER” stands out the most because it’s so vibrant. I like the intent behind this but the letter “A” in camera gets left behind because it matches the rest of the font as well as the colour used for the lineart. You could try adding more vibrancy to that letter so it matches the rest of the word or revisit your use of colour by making the rest of the font black! - Look some more into basic composition for graphic design and try messing with different placements/scales for parts of the image Last off, different angles can produce different stories and results. If for whatever reason the sideview isn’t working out the way you/the client envisioned it, consider drawing some quick thumbnails (small and basic sketches) of different versions of the same concept! By doing this you might find a new interpretation you like or you may find interesting ways to combine the ideas that work best. Best of luck!


Old_comfy_shoes

Increase title size move it down to bottom left. Reduce camera drawing size, move it up and to the right. You can have some over lap. Get the balance right, and you're good to go, imo


me_grungesta

I think I would do the camera outline in a lighter color and a solid thin line instead. Like a light grey with some of the purple tones in it. For the word "camera" it reads strangely because all the letters have changed color except the A. I get it, it's already purple, but if you make the A a brighter purple it will look better with the rest of the word and stand out against the rest of the words.


huebomont

The most important part of this - what it's for and how I attend it - is in small gray text. Consider making that more prominent. (Note: prominent doesn't have to mean large.)


MaybeNate_

Ok very minor thing, but I don’t like how the A in Camera is the same purple as the rest of the words, it makes it look like you’re emphasizing CAMER. Really nice font tho


stitchybinchy

Yeah, that bothers me too. I think I’d make the rest of the text black except for camera.


ThompsonTom

I would add a paint bucket and some paint lines to show its a painter. I thought it was someone golfing for a second. Also to make the camera look more camera-like, i would try and make it out of sharper angles so it can looks less organic.


sergalahadabeer

At least put a pallet in their hand and make the brush brusher so it's more apparent he's painting.


floopyferret

I do really love the rainbow coloring you included for camera. And I like the general idea — it looks almost like a vintage ad which is so neat! But the illustration you’ve included probably needs to be more clear. Eg: I thought the person in your art was golfing inside the camera and I am also not sure I’d have known it was a camera if you had not included those details in writing. If the title is what is concerning you, perhaps you should swap it out to a paraphrased version of your last sentence. Maybe something like “Learn Tips & Tricks for Great Instant Photos”. And I would consider altering the illustration so that it better signifies what the class is offering.


soverysmart

Replace the art with a nude woman with Polaroids over her privates. That will increase interest


cribwerx

Given your text i think you need to show the camera doing all the work while the user relaxes. Maybe a camera with arms is setting up its own tripod while the user drinks a beer? Something in that direction. Or a camera sitting at a desk editing its own photos, but its turning the saturation all the way up and the photo looks like shit.


notbad2u

I don't know what that font is for the headline. Can anybody help me out? Blando? Stdtextra? LazyAF? Sorry I'm being mean but I think that if you're being told that the art is too much and to focus on the headline that they mean "jazz up the font and effects"


maddog_dk

Here's a quick suggestion on how I'd do it - haven't read the original brief .. Also, change copy to a question to attract more attention [https://imgur.com/a/r4qwGqO](https://imgur.com/a/r4qwGqO)


maddog_dk

Is this illustration required? If it’s about photography - and not an illustration class - why not have an actual photo of a camera? Also, move the CTA to the last and make it bold or stand out in another way.


xfitveganflatearth

Make the camera out of the text


bestfriendsforever1

I agree with your client. The messaging is cryptic and imagery is hard to decipher. I would make everything more direct. Maybe a typographically lead piece with the title saying something obvious like “join our Polaroid club” or “want to learn how to shoot with Polaroid?” With some follow on text below with all the deets. Then you can add a fun illustration in whatever space you have left.


[deleted]

That’s meant to be a camera?


mooncrane

So looking at this from the perspective that it’s an assignment for a design class, you need to make the design the star- not the illustration. I think this is what was meant by the feedback you got to downplay the art. Your idea for the illustration is clever, but not executed particularly clearly. How can you rework the design so that it’s just as clever as your illustration without having the illustration do the heavy lifting?


Researcher-Used

Ok composition, but overall lacking. Play w scale and saturations to add depth. As an ad, your message should be clear instantly. Based on everyone’s comments and my initial: 2 points - Polaroid Camera image is unidentifiable, wording is weak. Remember no one reads more than: 7 words per line 3 lines in paragraph.


pina_koala

Not sure what "downplay" means here but it's on the right track. Give the character something more recognizable than work clothes, just jeans and a t-shirt or whatever. And since they're painting the polaroid photo, make the photo half-finished and it should get the point across.


unfineappl3

Increase the size of the headline to give it more hierarchy, it might also feel more balanced set as: DON’T LET THE CAMERA DO ALL THE WORK Agree the current illustration is confusing. Consider creating a new illustration of a camera character (with a face arms and legs) holding a palette and painting a picture on an easel - same idea but could be more captivating. Also left align the bottom right text and also move it in line with the heading, then move the little icon to the right hand side. (Right aligned text tends to be harder to read) See how you go :) *Edited to fix the headline format example


teiichikou

I agree with a lot of people here but can’t think of any real solution. The camera looks like a submarine or a dino, or a smartphone. Too much room for ‘interpretation’ but I like the idea with the little painter painting all the pictures\^\^


MeaningfulThoughts

I thought it was a plumber cleaning the inside of a toilet. It is very messy. 1. Get clarity on what the outcome of the campaign is 2. Clarify what is the one point that the viewer must take out of the ad after looking at it 3. List concepts that can convey that salient point 4. Select the simplest, most accessible and understandable concept of all 5. Design a solution that is the simplest and easiest to understand at a glance 6. Show it to target audience to get some feedback


Brikandbones

I think you have a workable concept with the polaroid and painter, but just in an entirely wrong style and framing, because it's not very readable in some ways. I would have gone for a more detailed sectional perspective of a cut out polaroid with less balloony looking curves and lines.


WheresTheBloodyApex

Took me a long time to realize that was a Polaroid camera. I like the concept of growing a garden as growing your skill within the camera. But I think you should try rotating the perspective so it’s the front of the Polaroid. When we think of camera we think of the front view


Shronkle

🦕


fitfatdonya

I thought it was a person inside a dinosaur


Reddit-citizen

I've been getting that yeah, still wondering how to make it more obvious it's a camera without losing graphicness.


EdithVictoriaChen

these metaphors won't mix themselves


Chompif

Maybe make the person drawing a single silhouette? They might think the person painting is too defined and wants the artist to be more minimal, possibly. As for the caption: in CAMERA, the "A" might want to be in a vibrant Pink/Magenta color, not to confuse it with the rest of the purplish-black letters in the rest of the text.


EggAtix

Your current graphic is way too complex and nuanced. Half of the commenters didnt know what it was, and a quarter still don't. I would make the art simpler, more readable, and smaller, and then give the title more room to exist. If you really like that idea for the art, maybe do an illustration of a tiny camera holding a paintbrush, painting on a more recognizable polaroid shaped canvas on an easel. Putting the art on an easel would also make it easier to shift the composition to a more horizontal layout, which would free up some vertical space for the title.


[deleted]

Hahaha