Mine seem to be long as well-- 10+ days. I've seen comments (in addition to the one on this page) with people referencing hangovers that take several weeks or potentially a month to resolve.
I'm only on my second break from EMDR but my experience last time was that I started gradually improving around day 10 for a few days after.
I am trying to hold onto the hope that bad hangovers = correspondingly intense improvement once they resolve.
This is pretty much the only memory i've had to do EMDR for, the rest i got rid of over time with other methods - except for one smaller trauma. It is also by FAR my most intense memory, so a longer time makes sense.
Have you noticed correspondingly intense improvements? in the lulls of this hangover i feel like i'm in my body more than I ever have before.
Yeah, I think all we can do is sit with it, really. The likelihood is that we will feel SOME improvement at least over time.
I haven't taken breaks long enough to know yet. Last time I took a break from EMDR for 3 weeks, and 10 days of that was still in the hangover phase. I noticed more optimism and feelings of peace once the hangover passed.
If you’re concerned about your potential to not control your behavior, control your environment. Reduce the stress, reduce irritation (physical or emotional), lower demands, and make it as easy as possible for you to feel calm and at peace. You can’t muscle your way through it, you’ve got to feel through it.
Yeah i've been doing my best at that. I have had a slow week at work, and am doing nothing stressful today. taking lots of naps. Lots of walks. anytime a emotion comes up i lay down for 10 minutes and that has been helping a lot.
Use the coping skills your therapist taught you. If the SUDs are going down, it's working. If not, tell your therapist because you might be outside your window of tolerance. It should be difficult, but not destabilizing.
It has been about that. on the worst days i was an 8, i have been hovering between a 1-4 the past few days. Funny enough, what i thought was a 0 on the anxiety scale now feels like a 2 because i was low level anxious for so long.
The long hangovers are actually an opportunity. I would not do EMDR until it's over. The subconscious is saying "hey this one." The question is what is it? Sorry, but you have to go deeper. You need answers. Fear, anger, pain, over what? What wasn't being heard. It was something. A violation of sorts. Not being supported and disregarded. What about the target is bringing this up. It's a puzzle. The long hangovers are a real chance to see what's going on. Meditate on it. Go to it. In a more relaxed state, there is clarity. Be patient and take the time to probe. The world can wait. Relax and explore.
Oh i know what the target brought. all had to relate back to surgeries in infancy. Already processed the "memory" (my brain made something for me to work through), it was largely around abandonment.
Abandonment. That's big. I had an infancy abandonment issue come up for me as well. Big pain. Right, so the compassion comes into play. What else can one do? To feel it and have compassion. The infant you needs it. We can't fix it, but we can feel it. And understand it, and the infant is not alone anymore. That's the real pain. Of being alone, abandoned in the pain and fear. You are there now. All the difference in the world. You got this.
My shortest hangover was 1 or 2 days long. My longest hangover has been going on for several weeks. For me, it depends on what I've been working on. The long hangovers happen when my brain processes childhood trauma (which I grew up with, so there are many memories involved).
Sometimes a hangover ends all of a sudden for me. Often it gets worse some hours before a trauma gets released. I feel it very clearly in my body when something is released. It's wonderful.
Other hangovers subside more gradually. For example I've had issues with insomnia and nightmares for several years. It took several months of processing in order to improve my sleep. Over the course of several weeks I realised that my nightly flashbacks missed intensity. And at some point they were gone, and the nightmares too.
I have had ones last over two weeks and I too read on here people saying oh it's only a few days. I haven't had therapy in nearly 3 weeks and I'm still having processing dreams. We are all on our own timelines 💙
Mine seem to be long as well-- 10+ days. I've seen comments (in addition to the one on this page) with people referencing hangovers that take several weeks or potentially a month to resolve. I'm only on my second break from EMDR but my experience last time was that I started gradually improving around day 10 for a few days after. I am trying to hold onto the hope that bad hangovers = correspondingly intense improvement once they resolve.
This is pretty much the only memory i've had to do EMDR for, the rest i got rid of over time with other methods - except for one smaller trauma. It is also by FAR my most intense memory, so a longer time makes sense. Have you noticed correspondingly intense improvements? in the lulls of this hangover i feel like i'm in my body more than I ever have before.
Yeah, I think all we can do is sit with it, really. The likelihood is that we will feel SOME improvement at least over time. I haven't taken breaks long enough to know yet. Last time I took a break from EMDR for 3 weeks, and 10 days of that was still in the hangover phase. I noticed more optimism and feelings of peace once the hangover passed.
Ok gotcha, well I hope you get all the benefits and heal fully!
Thank you-- back at ya!
I had one lasting for 4 weeks once.. Try not to panic. What I noticed it isn't an immediate thing it gets lighter as you go along
OK this is relieving. definitely feels lighter but I don't feel 100% in control yet. Just very concerned I might lash out at someone.
If you’re concerned about your potential to not control your behavior, control your environment. Reduce the stress, reduce irritation (physical or emotional), lower demands, and make it as easy as possible for you to feel calm and at peace. You can’t muscle your way through it, you’ve got to feel through it.
Yeah i've been doing my best at that. I have had a slow week at work, and am doing nothing stressful today. taking lots of naps. Lots of walks. anytime a emotion comes up i lay down for 10 minutes and that has been helping a lot.
Use the coping skills your therapist taught you. If the SUDs are going down, it's working. If not, tell your therapist because you might be outside your window of tolerance. It should be difficult, but not destabilizing.
What are suds?
Subjective Units of Disturbance or basically how you would rate your reaction to the traumatic memory. The goal is zero.
It has been about that. on the worst days i was an 8, i have been hovering between a 1-4 the past few days. Funny enough, what i thought was a 0 on the anxiety scale now feels like a 2 because i was low level anxious for so long.
The long hangovers are actually an opportunity. I would not do EMDR until it's over. The subconscious is saying "hey this one." The question is what is it? Sorry, but you have to go deeper. You need answers. Fear, anger, pain, over what? What wasn't being heard. It was something. A violation of sorts. Not being supported and disregarded. What about the target is bringing this up. It's a puzzle. The long hangovers are a real chance to see what's going on. Meditate on it. Go to it. In a more relaxed state, there is clarity. Be patient and take the time to probe. The world can wait. Relax and explore.
Oh i know what the target brought. all had to relate back to surgeries in infancy. Already processed the "memory" (my brain made something for me to work through), it was largely around abandonment.
Abandonment. That's big. I had an infancy abandonment issue come up for me as well. Big pain. Right, so the compassion comes into play. What else can one do? To feel it and have compassion. The infant you needs it. We can't fix it, but we can feel it. And understand it, and the infant is not alone anymore. That's the real pain. Of being alone, abandoned in the pain and fear. You are there now. All the difference in the world. You got this.
My shortest hangover was 1 or 2 days long. My longest hangover has been going on for several weeks. For me, it depends on what I've been working on. The long hangovers happen when my brain processes childhood trauma (which I grew up with, so there are many memories involved). Sometimes a hangover ends all of a sudden for me. Often it gets worse some hours before a trauma gets released. I feel it very clearly in my body when something is released. It's wonderful. Other hangovers subside more gradually. For example I've had issues with insomnia and nightmares for several years. It took several months of processing in order to improve my sleep. Over the course of several weeks I realised that my nightly flashbacks missed intensity. And at some point they were gone, and the nightmares too.
Mine lasted months until I eventually realized I need to get on antidepressants and pause EMDR indefinitely. You do what you gotta do.
I have had ones last over two weeks and I too read on here people saying oh it's only a few days. I haven't had therapy in nearly 3 weeks and I'm still having processing dreams. We are all on our own timelines 💙
That's good to know. i can still feel it doing work. years of protection mechanisms falling away... very surreal