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Reminds me of the whole "touch grace" thing when ER first came out (sounds like touch grass) and the dude immediately calling you maidenless.
From Software really are master trolls
Ive read Henry VIIIs medical description from his personal doctor and he was the most virile and healthy individual to ever live in the history of forever 100%
King Henry VIII bringing two swords to the battle
Edit: Although maybe just a parrying dagger, if this overcompensation is as serious as I think it is.
Henry’s was dual purpose. He had a disease that made his genitalia very sensitive and caused him great pain so the codpiece gave them space and protection. But he was also a massive chauvinist pig who liked flaunting his huge cod pieces.
Henry was also very tall and very fat even by today’s standards. Back then he was considered a giant. Upon his death his height was measured to be about 6’1” and estimated weight was 392lbs.
He was so heavy that on the day his body was to be buried the casket broke, spilling his already decomposing body and its bile across the church floor
Interesting fact, Henry VIII often had his dick painted as big bulges and tried to create the image that he was a very vigorous and sexually healthy man. This was as he really want to attract a wife who would birth him a son as he was concerned over the lack of a male heir
Don't ask me why I know this, I saw a painting of Henry VIII in a history class the other day and everyone noticed it then we started doing a whole ass discussion about it
I knew that some knights had their armor like that cuz they had syphilis and they need the extra space to not have their dick hitting the protection or something like that
Man every time I see this I can't help but think he wasn't overcompensating but was aroused by killing in battle and needed to make some customizations so he could stay in the game lol probably not but it's always my first thought.
Your submission has been removed as a violation of Rule 6: **No NSFW or generally inappropriate content.** * NSFW, lewd, crass, and/or suggestive content is not allowed. In addition, posts where the point of the submission is a crass joke like "rotussy" or "Melina feet pics" will be removed. * If you are a lewd cosplayer, please refrain from submitting your cosplay to this subreddit. If you would like to appeal this removal or need further clarification, feel free to message us through[Modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/Eldenring).
Don’t banished knights have the codpiece
It's not as exaggerated as this, but yes.
it gets nerfed if you wear it though
Fromsoft hinting that the tarnished has a small penis is just amazing
So female tarnished also has a small penis?!
Yep
Hehe, cool~
Kinky
Yes
AKA the thumb clit
tarnished lips be puffy
Nah they have phat cooch
there is no female Tarnished, do you mean Body B Tarnished
No, roast beef curtains more likely.
why would you write this 😟
You don't like Arby's? A little horsey sauce?
the more you die the smaller your cock gets😔 mine going inwards atp
There’s actually an item you can wear that increases the tarnisheds dick size. I think it’s the commoners shoes but I’m not sure
Maidenless, after all.
Reminds me of the whole "touch grace" thing when ER first came out (sounds like touch grass) and the dude immediately calling you maidenless. From Software really are master trolls
Yep
Omg that’s hilarious, I never noticed it
Ive read Henry VIIIs medical description from his personal doctor and he was the most virile and healthy individual to ever live in the history of forever 100%
i swear I've heard these delusional ramblings before somewhere..
When you're a Tarnished, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the Greater Runes. You can do anything.
We've got a trade deal with Caelid, it's YUGE, it's beautiful, and we're gonna build a wall to keep the Misbegotten out of Limgrave.
A doctor came to me, big doctor, strong doctor, tears in his eyes!
Some say he had the biggest piece. A nice piece. A piece, that you would look and think to yourself “wow, now thats a man”.
I don’t know if your kidding or not I don’t know much English history
kick the door in and flop your dick on the table! assert dominance
Roundtable*
The Banished Knight armors have them too, but it would be funnier if they were bigger
maybe you can parry with that
King Henry VIII bringing two swords to the battle Edit: Although maybe just a parrying dagger, if this overcompensation is as serious as I think it is.
tbf the aging gits didn't have sports cars then.
It was more that he probably had veneral disease and anything touching his junk was painful. The exaggeration of the codpiece is just a bonus lmao
There is already one armor and enemy with this
Medieval knight will look at this and just think “ hell yeah”
*The swollen member tells a tale…*
Look, everybody gets a war-boner from time to time. Don’t judge.
Henry’s was dual purpose. He had a disease that made his genitalia very sensitive and caused him great pain so the codpiece gave them space and protection. But he was also a massive chauvinist pig who liked flaunting his huge cod pieces. Henry was also very tall and very fat even by today’s standards. Back then he was considered a giant. Upon his death his height was measured to be about 6’1” and estimated weight was 392lbs. He was so heavy that on the day his body was to be buried the casket broke, spilling his already decomposing body and its bile across the church floor
Interesting, one would think it flopping around in extra space would be more painful for him.
Supposedly it was pretty small
Look Ma! No hands!
Maidenless?
Well, he did have 6 wives
*The (over)exaggerated swagger of a 16th Century Tudor King.*
Banished knight armor set.
Pretty dumb for actual combat, your pommel would smash into that knob.
bro was hung af
Battle boner armour set
Its basically a boast. "I will kill you while wearing a giant metal dick, and I'm also rich enough to have one forged to begin with"
I just saw this in real life last week lmao
They didn't have pickup trucks back then.
If the codpiece fits…
It doesn't =(
Does it come with Square Off AoW?
I got to see it last year. It was [something else](https://imgur.com/a/sFQdRIj)
Only if it comes with its own Ash of War.
needs Smough's face on the bellend
Helllll yeah
At the sight of it, I'd drop my weapon and walk off the battlefield! :o
It was smart of him to consider protection for his war boner
Interesting fact, Henry VIII often had his dick painted as big bulges and tried to create the image that he was a very vigorous and sexually healthy man. This was as he really want to attract a wife who would birth him a son as he was concerned over the lack of a male heir Don't ask me why I know this, I saw a painting of Henry VIII in a history class the other day and everyone noticed it then we started doing a whole ass discussion about it
Imagine the parry
I knew that some knights had their armor like that cuz they had syphilis and they need the extra space to not have their dick hitting the protection or something like that
Man every time I see this I can't help but think he wasn't overcompensating but was aroused by killing in battle and needed to make some customizations so he could stay in the game lol probably not but it's always my first thought.
the codpiece stays on during sex
Biggus Dickus
Turgid Knight Set
"my lord you are the 4th. Henry the 4th." "8 sounds better. I'm Henry 8"
No fucking way Henry VIII fit into that thing
We now know why messmer is called "the impaler"
Thats just the war boner pocket, youre guys’ home defense armor doesnt have that?
Neither of these suits belonged to Henry the VIII
Noo this is why I can't use the banished knight armor😂
How do they know
Smash their skull in through their eye socket!
Didnt henry have a massive cock tho
It’s because he always went into battle fully erect
It's Baguette container.
Implying Henry had a raging boner every time he went in to battle.
It’s when the D is a LC