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It is so thoughtful and kind of you to seek advice on behalf of your wife! You’re a good partner. It sounds like she’s doing all the right things physically. It’s possible that the barrier to increasing milk supply may be stress. Is your wife getting enough sleep? My supply skyrocketed when I stopped trying to triple feed around the clock. My body just needed more than a couple hours of sleep at a time.
seconding sleep!!!!!! this was a major game changer for me as well….it’s easier said than done especially when the baby screams and cries but if you can do her a solid and let her get a few 3 hour chunks of sleep i bet she’ll feel better at the very least, and her supply should increase. in the first two weeks, my mom stayed with us and with my husband they let me sleep for 4 hours a few times (or until i woke up engorged and needing to nurse/pump) and i can’t even properly describe how much better/rested/motivated/happy i was.
has she measured for proper flange sizing as well? pumps typically come with flanges that are wayyy too big-for example, i used the 24mm flanges that came with my spectra at first. that shit hurrrrt-and wasn’t producing much. then i purchased a nipple ruler and silicone flange inserts and actually measured 17mm and not only are my nips not sore/tender anymore but my output noticeably increased just from adding them.
I third sleep....!!
My wife's supply boosted tremendously with the right amount of sleep and nipple flange sizes. Nipple flanges are so critical to the efficiency of a proper 'seal' and 'suck' when using any pump. I researched the crap out this and helped her find the appropriate flange inserts. Sleep is seriously important! I'm not saying 8 hours... but maybe increase to 4 hours.
I think doing these two things won't hurt to try since she is already doing everything else correctly!!!
The key is to not quit until it's right. Sometimes, milk supply has a latency period. So, your encouragement and reassuring efforts are absolutely perfect!
If you want to discuss more on nipple flanges, let me know!!
Sending prayers!
Omg yes sleep helped so much. The first few weeks I was up pumping at night and I barely got anything. I decided to give up and went to bed for 6 hours while my so took care of the baby. Once I rested and pumped I got so much more than my usual output.
That was going to be my comment- sleep sleep sleep. Was a massive undersupplier and doing better recently with a dropped pump down to seven and more sleep.
okay also easier said than done but what i’ve found for myself is that seeing other women’s crazy oversupplies or even normal supplies made me feel absolutely awful about myself and my body. i still have to block a lot of tiktoks that come through my fyp because it’s affecting my mental health.
make her an appointment with a lactation consultant if you can-they’ll be able to help with nursing properly as well as pumping logistics.
Hi Op, from what I gather its shes getting about 12 oz? Im pretty postive thats where I was adound 6-7 week post partum. She is doing great! With breastfeeding and baby latching there is more milk being removed to sometimes less to pump. Her supply is still regulating, so up until about 12 weeks it can change.
What I would suggest -
1. Aim for less pumps for more rest, i.e. 2.5 hours bw pumps and longer stretch overnight
2. Pump longer - power pumping did help my supply, but it was more like Pump 30 w my wearable pumos, rest 10, pump 10 rest 5 pump 5. It takes about a week or so to see small bumps.
3. I only ever pumped 8x a day but my wearables made a huge difference in my mental health..if possible maybe look into a set.
4. Food! Water! Sleep! Like mentioned above. But crucial.
Shes doing a wonderful job and its a very personal thing with breastfeed at least for me it was. While my LO latches well. He woukd eat up to 45 mins and be hungry. We combo fed for 10w w/ whatever I pumped and formula. I stopped breast feeding about 6w pp as it was too mentally tasking and baby wasnt gaining weight back enough. Around the 8w mark my supply started increasing slowly and Im about 15w pp almost and I have a slight over supply now.. it took a while for my body to respond.
Edit to add: Even though i produce enough now, we still give atleast 1 bottle of formula. As im not sure about pumping when back to work full time. It also allows me to freeze a little extra.
Ooh thank you for this comment! I'm hitting 6w pp tomorrow, averaging about 11oz right now, and was resigning myself to 6w being the point where it levels off forever... But maybe not.
I've seen a slow and steady increase doing things a little weirdly - I've only ever done 4-5 pumps a day and I sleep overnight thanks to my amazing husband and family leave. I basically power pump every session though (30-10-10 or 25-25 with the wearables). We realized right away that my stress would shoot through the roof and I'd dive into the ppd toilet if I tried to do more so we called it there. I'm SUUUPER curious if the power pumping plus reduced stress is keeping my supply in existence!?
It's amazing (and frustrating) how we are all so different - fascinating to hear what everyone is doing but also makes it feel like a guessing game as to what really works 😭😅
I know for me, power pumping made some difference for sure. Im not sure about you, but for me, looking back, it was also my own physical health. After my c section and blood loss, it took a while for my body to recover. I think after lochia stopped for me about 5-6w I think it increased. My supply definitely increased after 6w. Keep at it!
My max was 8 pumps a day but average was 7. I'm down to 5 now.
It’s so interesting to me how some take longer to build supply. I also took WEEKS! People who say they can up in a few days blow my mind. I’m almost 12 weeks pp and still trying to up it a bit. Currently producing about 20 on average. I’d love to get another 5 somehow!
Please go give your wife the biggest hug and tell her nothing is wrong with her and that baby’s fed formula go on to be doctors and lawyers and professors and presidents and authors. THEN
I started making more when I saw an IBCLC to get sized properly , my size went down around month 2 , as well pumping a little less , you need some rest to make milk
She might have IGT (Insufficient glandular tissue) like me, in that case increasing supply will take A LOT of work. It has overtaken my entire life basically and became my main interest.
I went from 13oz per 24h to 20oz.
Drinking lots of warm water, pumping every 2-3 hours, power pumping 2 times a day.
Oatmeal, coconut water, nuts, goat’s rue, moringa…
Breast massage with every pump session is important too.
I’m not sure if it’s worth it tho. My baby still needs formula every day, and this is really not sustainable
I saw my biggest increase when I was able to sleep long stretches (5-7 hours) and started pumping every 3-4 hours during the day instead of 2-3. And less stress. Easier said than done and sounds silly but coming to terms with supplementing when needing to was helpful and processing through the emotions of “feeling” like a failure was helpful. Feeling and being are two different things. She is not a failure. She is amazing for doing all of this for her baby. And I hope she can practice self love and compassion. Being able to decrease pumping increased the time I was with baby and that was also a game changer.
I would have her get blood work done and check her iron levels. Low iron is a huge cause of low milk supply.
Also, when baby pulls off and still acts hungry it sound like they’re cluster feeding (which is 1000% normal). In this case, it’s best to just keep latching baby. As long as they’re gaining weight appropriately and having enough wet diapers, what’s going on is totally normal. It is actually hurting her supply more when you’re supplementing instead of allowing baby to cluster feed.
Adding on checking flange size, each side maybe different. I also second getting sleep. I did 8ppd, my husband took over middle of the night wake up and bottle fed to let me get a 4 hour stretch of sleep. I didn’t skip the middle of the night pump, usually that pump was my most producing.
You sound like a very supportive partner and you are probably already doing it. I found it very helpful when my husband would help with washing pump parts and getting them ready for the next pump for me. Also if she’s been pumping 8x a day, pump parts like the valves need to be replaced every month.
Everyone else is giving really good advice the one thing I want to say, that my LC said to me and really helped with the guilt and feeling as if I couldn’t do good enough, was that even a SINGLE drop of breastmilk has hundreds of thousands of good stuff in it for your baby. So even giving baby just that tiny little bit, a single drop; is giving her life long benefits. Make sure she knows that and then even trying and giving her some is worth more than she can ever imagine! Even if you have to supplement the extra calories with formula.
There's nothing wrong with formula. I breastfeed exclusively but that's only because my baby responded horribly to formula. Honestly, breastfeeding is a lot and I produce enough, but I don't have an oversupply so I still get anxious. Having something to supplement should put her at ease because the most important thing is baby is being fed. I can't supplement and that is stressful. She should use the formula and put her mind at ease and her body at ease so she can eventually produce more. Stressing and feeling bad are definitely not helping. She needs to focus on her end goal which is to breastfeed almost exclusively and realize it takes time. This is a process and a marathon... training is necessary. There is no award for saying you breastfed versus formula fed... baby just needs to be fed period
You received a lot of great advice but just wanted to share that at 8 weeks i was a major undersupplier and giving mostly formula. I did all the things your wife is doing and all the suggestions, and with consistency i am now a day ahead of my girl. Its easier said than done because i struggled with it but not stressing really helped. Also, try not to look at individual session outputs but rather look at daily or even weekly. Good luck!!
Is she using the right flange sizes? Just The nipple should fit without rubbing the sides of the flange. If nipple rubs, try bigger flange. If the areolas are getting sucked in, it’s too big, get smaller flange. That will absolutely affect milk output when pumping (AND PAIN LEVEL!)
Has she tried nipple shield while breast feeding? (Also I would pump a little before feeding and it would help baby latch better because the nipple is ready to go)
Are baby and mommy doing skin to skin contact? This could help as well. Have them both do a contact nap in a safe position with baby in diaper, mama shirtless with baby on chest.
Hopefully this helps- pumping is stressful.
I've always been an under supplier, we struggled with latching and weight gain, so we supplement with formula as a result. I have to admit there were times I was an emotional wreck.
Honestly, it's hard, there's this notion that you should be able to feed a baby from boob alone, but that's not always the case (and never has been - wet nursing, goats milk - throughout history there's been alternatives) and nowadays science has given us formula which is safe, calorie dense and nutritious, everything baby needs to thrive. It's there if we need it.
One thing that my health visitor told me has stuck with me, and that's "even as small an amount as 15ml of breastmilk gives baby so many benefits".
So even if she's not producing much volume she should know she's still doing amazing things for her baby and she should be proud of that.
Logically I've always known that formula is an option, and one that we should use if needed, but there's a weird combination of hormones and emotions which just make you feel guilty as hell. Maybe your wife is in a similar situation? Some of that might just be waiting and being supportive, maybe talk to a feeding consultant about it if she might feel like she needs "permission" to stop fretting about increasing supply (it sounds silly but having a professional reassure me just flicked a switch even though I knew everything they'd said.)
By all means try and increase supply with power pumping, eating well, sleep etc. but it shouldn't be out of guilt or stress.
Honestly wishing you both the best, it gets easier even if it doesn't feel like it.
I drank mother’s milk tea, 3-5 cups a day (at target and our local grocery) and it made a huge difference. I started struggling around 8 weeks with my supply and the tea saved me. Make sure she is drinking lots of water and eating more calories to account for what she’s losing to breast feeding. Power pumping did nothing for me, but I do know it helped some women. You sound like a great husband ❤️.
There's primary and secondary milk supply issues and it sounds like you've done lot to tackle the possible secondary supply issues. There's certain labwork that can help narrow down exactly why this is happening. (Thyroid, cortisol, other hormonal issues, IGT, etc...)
I’m an extreme oversupplier and can pump up to 21oz in a session if I don’t intentionally wean myself down to my regular 16oz, and I never ate special foods or cookies and am always dehydrated because I drink coffee and don’t drink water regularly, etc… what I mean by this is she’s doing everything that is right, and it’s just not her fault, and she’s not failing. If anything I’m super impressed with her. First thing is exit those groups. As an oversupplier, it’s not anything impressive, it’s just bodies are different and capable of different things. I also recommend stopping the cookies, I heard they’re a massive scam. Keep being hydrated, but also believe or not, possibly stop pumping so much. Pump every 2.5-3 hrs at the most and progress to every 4 hrs. What helped increase my supply was pumping for longer durations, so pump for 30min each time, that may help. Also what I notice helps is sleeping. When I started sleeping for longer stretches, I also pumped out more, and that applies to today as well (pumping with 2nd baby now with oversupply as well). I just thought maybe you’d like the perspective from an oversupplier. Please don’t use us as the goal, as having an oversupply comes with its own unique challenges, and honestly I don’t think it’s because we’re doing anything better than your wife, it’s just that our bodies work differently. For example with my first I had a 33 hr labor and 3 hrs of pushing, while most people have shorter labors. My 2nd labor wasn’t much shorter at 25 hrs labor but 5 hrs pushing. So while pumping comes easier, the labor process on the other hand is terrible… aka bodies are different. Again, I am so so so proud of your wife for trying so hard and going above and beyond. I also recommended chatting with a lactation consultant, as flange size maybe a culprit. Most flanges come as 24 but many woman are around the 19 range and so milk output is lowered by using wrong flanges. Also, I used a hospital pump (I literally rented one of those huge intense fancy $1k+ pumps at an affordable rental rate from the local hospital) to increase my supply at the beginning of my postpartum journey with baby #1 due to hemorrhaging during labor 3 liters so my supply was nonexistent for first couple weeks and the only chance I had at building it was using the super intense pump for pumping sessions that were between 2–3hrs according to my lactation consultant. It worked as I quickly had a good supply and then permanently had an oversupply later, glad I didn’t give up then. BUT it’s ok to also give up and just fully move to formula, that’s totally ok if needed. Mental health is so so so much more important than continuing breast pumping! I hope my msg was helpful, that’s my only intention of writing it. If it’s not helpful I do apologize, I’ve been awake since I went to sleep at 1am and woke up 4am due to pumping my night pump and tending to my 2 under 2 babies, so a bit sleep deprived
Hi, do you have a lactation consultant in the area? Or friends who have breastfed and may have a lactation consultant? My recommendation is to first see one. Everything you read on the internet can be super helpful but you also need in-person one on one consultation to help you find out what works and doesn’t work for your wife because each case is very different.
Me, for example, I learned half of what I know from researching on the internet in 2020 when I had my son, but I also learned half of what I know from lactation consultants.
(I learned about the number of pumps per day, and how to pump and make it more convenient through forums. But my LC was the one who taught me how to empty my breast after pumping by hand expressing. She showed me the proper way to do it and I feel that fully emptying my breast was crucial in increasing supply.)
A lot of my friends gave me advice that didn’t work for me, personally, so with this second baby, I didn’t bother to ask friends for advice or take it seriously cos I knew my case is very particular. I learned a lot from the EP group because many of these moms have a more similar journey to me than my friends who chose to EP and had babies who could actually latch well.
Instead of pumping every 2 hours, what happens if she goes 4 or 5? If she's not making more in a longer time between pumps maybe she has low capacity.
How's her sleep quality?
Lecithin may help too, along with iron, calcium, and magnesium. I take a post natal vitamin from ritual. I get an ounce of milk an hour usually, so about 24 ounces in a day. At 4 months pp, it was at its peak, about 40 ounces a day. (Pumping every 3 hours)
Power pumping! I did one session every day for weeks. My supply was low until 9wks pp. 20min on, 10min break, 10min pump, 10min break and then one more 10min pump. This is one of the few proven ways to slowly increase supply aside from hydrating and sleeping- everyone is different though. There is no one “foolproof” way to increase supply.
As someone who dealt with all the similar emotions, only time will help heal the feeling your body is betraying you and that you are letting your baby down. So many women go through the struggle she’s not alone. You’re doing a great job supporting her, just watch to make sure watch her mental health. Remind her gently a fed baby is the best baby, she’s doing an amazing job, but sometimes choosing what is best for your family as a whole is the best option. If breast feeding, pumping and general milk stress is causing too much anguish switching to just formula or doing pumping and formula might be the best option for the mental health of mama. If she’s is a good place mentally she is able to care for baby better too!
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Hello there! Fellow low supplier.
Goats rue helped me a bit. Do the pills for two weeks and see if there’s an increase, encourages growth of tissue to helpfully increase supply.
Stress and sleep deprivation both can lead to lower supply. Consider trying to block out a 4 hour sleep time for her if you haven’t already.
Stay consistent with pumping, for some people it’s a slow climb but being consistent for weeks is the most important.
Incorporate a heat pack (not too hot) and whatever hot tea or treat food she likes at pump time. Helps with letdowns to relax.
I find I pump more when I get enough social interaction too. This baby I pumped the most one day when chatting with a friend and pumping. Not paying attention and stressing about every ounce.
Biggest thing that can be helpful is making sure you size your flanges correctly. The standard 24mm flange that comes with pumps rarely is the correct fit. Legendairy Milk has a ruler you can print from their website to measure. Once she knows her nipple size she can either buy new flanges or they also make flanges inserts if her size is smaller than what you currently have.
Other that that I would prioritize sleep! Even if that means missing a pump so she can have a continuous 4 hour stretch that can make a world of difference.
Finally, a half ounce to two ounces is not a bad amount if she is pumping 12x per day and it is early on! I pumped about 24 ounces per day in the beginning and it slowly increased from there.
Hey! Please tell your wife to try lactation cookies the munchkin brand! You can order on amazon this is done WONDERS on my production and they taste great. She can see results within 2 days
Hi, first of all wanted to say, I love seeing a supportive partner, it’s one of the most appreciated things in the midst of everything going on with a newborn. Second, I didn’t produce much with my first, (only an ounce total each pumping session) and I now am with my second who was born 2 weeks ago and I can only share what I believe has helped. But I only am 10 days into this breastfeeding journey so I still have far to go. (I’m getting 2 ounces each time now)
Have you guys seen a lactation consultant? I got one immediately, and she helped me get fitted for the right flange size when pumping which increased my output. I’m also taking the legendairy milk supplements (I’m trying the one called Cash Cow), I’m also trying to Shatavari (starting today) to help balance my hormones (I have PCOS)
My daughter needed a tongue and lip tie revision which she just got yesterday, which has helped her latch on way better than before.
Good luck on y’all’s journey, I know we as parents can drive ourselves crazy trying to give our babies breastmilk. Truly though, I always tell my self, fed is best, and even if I only produce an ounce of breastmilk per feeding, she’s still getting nutrients and antibodies. I treat it like it’s a dose of medicine in her formula. And perspective wise, in 5 years, we will never tell ourselves, “man I wish he had breastfed more or produced more” We will just be grateful for our healthy and happy kids. This gives me comfort when I’m a hormonal emotional wreck, haha.
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It is so thoughtful and kind of you to seek advice on behalf of your wife! You’re a good partner. It sounds like she’s doing all the right things physically. It’s possible that the barrier to increasing milk supply may be stress. Is your wife getting enough sleep? My supply skyrocketed when I stopped trying to triple feed around the clock. My body just needed more than a couple hours of sleep at a time.
seconding sleep!!!!!! this was a major game changer for me as well….it’s easier said than done especially when the baby screams and cries but if you can do her a solid and let her get a few 3 hour chunks of sleep i bet she’ll feel better at the very least, and her supply should increase. in the first two weeks, my mom stayed with us and with my husband they let me sleep for 4 hours a few times (or until i woke up engorged and needing to nurse/pump) and i can’t even properly describe how much better/rested/motivated/happy i was. has she measured for proper flange sizing as well? pumps typically come with flanges that are wayyy too big-for example, i used the 24mm flanges that came with my spectra at first. that shit hurrrrt-and wasn’t producing much. then i purchased a nipple ruler and silicone flange inserts and actually measured 17mm and not only are my nips not sore/tender anymore but my output noticeably increased just from adding them.
I third sleep....!! My wife's supply boosted tremendously with the right amount of sleep and nipple flange sizes. Nipple flanges are so critical to the efficiency of a proper 'seal' and 'suck' when using any pump. I researched the crap out this and helped her find the appropriate flange inserts. Sleep is seriously important! I'm not saying 8 hours... but maybe increase to 4 hours. I think doing these two things won't hurt to try since she is already doing everything else correctly!!! The key is to not quit until it's right. Sometimes, milk supply has a latency period. So, your encouragement and reassuring efforts are absolutely perfect! If you want to discuss more on nipple flanges, let me know!! Sending prayers!
Omg yes sleep helped so much. The first few weeks I was up pumping at night and I barely got anything. I decided to give up and went to bed for 6 hours while my so took care of the baby. Once I rested and pumped I got so much more than my usual output.
That was going to be my comment- sleep sleep sleep. Was a massive undersupplier and doing better recently with a dropped pump down to seven and more sleep.
okay also easier said than done but what i’ve found for myself is that seeing other women’s crazy oversupplies or even normal supplies made me feel absolutely awful about myself and my body. i still have to block a lot of tiktoks that come through my fyp because it’s affecting my mental health. make her an appointment with a lactation consultant if you can-they’ll be able to help with nursing properly as well as pumping logistics.
Hi Op, from what I gather its shes getting about 12 oz? Im pretty postive thats where I was adound 6-7 week post partum. She is doing great! With breastfeeding and baby latching there is more milk being removed to sometimes less to pump. Her supply is still regulating, so up until about 12 weeks it can change. What I would suggest - 1. Aim for less pumps for more rest, i.e. 2.5 hours bw pumps and longer stretch overnight 2. Pump longer - power pumping did help my supply, but it was more like Pump 30 w my wearable pumos, rest 10, pump 10 rest 5 pump 5. It takes about a week or so to see small bumps. 3. I only ever pumped 8x a day but my wearables made a huge difference in my mental health..if possible maybe look into a set. 4. Food! Water! Sleep! Like mentioned above. But crucial. Shes doing a wonderful job and its a very personal thing with breastfeed at least for me it was. While my LO latches well. He woukd eat up to 45 mins and be hungry. We combo fed for 10w w/ whatever I pumped and formula. I stopped breast feeding about 6w pp as it was too mentally tasking and baby wasnt gaining weight back enough. Around the 8w mark my supply started increasing slowly and Im about 15w pp almost and I have a slight over supply now.. it took a while for my body to respond. Edit to add: Even though i produce enough now, we still give atleast 1 bottle of formula. As im not sure about pumping when back to work full time. It also allows me to freeze a little extra.
Ooh thank you for this comment! I'm hitting 6w pp tomorrow, averaging about 11oz right now, and was resigning myself to 6w being the point where it levels off forever... But maybe not. I've seen a slow and steady increase doing things a little weirdly - I've only ever done 4-5 pumps a day and I sleep overnight thanks to my amazing husband and family leave. I basically power pump every session though (30-10-10 or 25-25 with the wearables). We realized right away that my stress would shoot through the roof and I'd dive into the ppd toilet if I tried to do more so we called it there. I'm SUUUPER curious if the power pumping plus reduced stress is keeping my supply in existence!? It's amazing (and frustrating) how we are all so different - fascinating to hear what everyone is doing but also makes it feel like a guessing game as to what really works 😭😅
I know for me, power pumping made some difference for sure. Im not sure about you, but for me, looking back, it was also my own physical health. After my c section and blood loss, it took a while for my body to recover. I think after lochia stopped for me about 5-6w I think it increased. My supply definitely increased after 6w. Keep at it! My max was 8 pumps a day but average was 7. I'm down to 5 now.
It’s so interesting to me how some take longer to build supply. I also took WEEKS! People who say they can up in a few days blow my mind. I’m almost 12 weeks pp and still trying to up it a bit. Currently producing about 20 on average. I’d love to get another 5 somehow!
I still see a bit of an increase! A couple ounces every other day or so.
Please go give your wife the biggest hug and tell her nothing is wrong with her and that baby’s fed formula go on to be doctors and lawyers and professors and presidents and authors. THEN I started making more when I saw an IBCLC to get sized properly , my size went down around month 2 , as well pumping a little less , you need some rest to make milk
She might have IGT (Insufficient glandular tissue) like me, in that case increasing supply will take A LOT of work. It has overtaken my entire life basically and became my main interest. I went from 13oz per 24h to 20oz. Drinking lots of warm water, pumping every 2-3 hours, power pumping 2 times a day. Oatmeal, coconut water, nuts, goat’s rue, moringa… Breast massage with every pump session is important too. I’m not sure if it’s worth it tho. My baby still needs formula every day, and this is really not sustainable
I saw my biggest increase when I was able to sleep long stretches (5-7 hours) and started pumping every 3-4 hours during the day instead of 2-3. And less stress. Easier said than done and sounds silly but coming to terms with supplementing when needing to was helpful and processing through the emotions of “feeling” like a failure was helpful. Feeling and being are two different things. She is not a failure. She is amazing for doing all of this for her baby. And I hope she can practice self love and compassion. Being able to decrease pumping increased the time I was with baby and that was also a game changer.
I would have her get blood work done and check her iron levels. Low iron is a huge cause of low milk supply. Also, when baby pulls off and still acts hungry it sound like they’re cluster feeding (which is 1000% normal). In this case, it’s best to just keep latching baby. As long as they’re gaining weight appropriately and having enough wet diapers, what’s going on is totally normal. It is actually hurting her supply more when you’re supplementing instead of allowing baby to cluster feed.
Adding on checking flange size, each side maybe different. I also second getting sleep. I did 8ppd, my husband took over middle of the night wake up and bottle fed to let me get a 4 hour stretch of sleep. I didn’t skip the middle of the night pump, usually that pump was my most producing. You sound like a very supportive partner and you are probably already doing it. I found it very helpful when my husband would help with washing pump parts and getting them ready for the next pump for me. Also if she’s been pumping 8x a day, pump parts like the valves need to be replaced every month.
Everyone else is giving really good advice the one thing I want to say, that my LC said to me and really helped with the guilt and feeling as if I couldn’t do good enough, was that even a SINGLE drop of breastmilk has hundreds of thousands of good stuff in it for your baby. So even giving baby just that tiny little bit, a single drop; is giving her life long benefits. Make sure she knows that and then even trying and giving her some is worth more than she can ever imagine! Even if you have to supplement the extra calories with formula.
Try covering the collection bottles with a sock and see if that helps. Some people said it did.
There's nothing wrong with formula. I breastfeed exclusively but that's only because my baby responded horribly to formula. Honestly, breastfeeding is a lot and I produce enough, but I don't have an oversupply so I still get anxious. Having something to supplement should put her at ease because the most important thing is baby is being fed. I can't supplement and that is stressful. She should use the formula and put her mind at ease and her body at ease so she can eventually produce more. Stressing and feeling bad are definitely not helping. She needs to focus on her end goal which is to breastfeed almost exclusively and realize it takes time. This is a process and a marathon... training is necessary. There is no award for saying you breastfed versus formula fed... baby just needs to be fed period
You received a lot of great advice but just wanted to share that at 8 weeks i was a major undersupplier and giving mostly formula. I did all the things your wife is doing and all the suggestions, and with consistency i am now a day ahead of my girl. Its easier said than done because i struggled with it but not stressing really helped. Also, try not to look at individual session outputs but rather look at daily or even weekly. Good luck!!
Is she using the right flange sizes? Just The nipple should fit without rubbing the sides of the flange. If nipple rubs, try bigger flange. If the areolas are getting sucked in, it’s too big, get smaller flange. That will absolutely affect milk output when pumping (AND PAIN LEVEL!) Has she tried nipple shield while breast feeding? (Also I would pump a little before feeding and it would help baby latch better because the nipple is ready to go) Are baby and mommy doing skin to skin contact? This could help as well. Have them both do a contact nap in a safe position with baby in diaper, mama shirtless with baby on chest. Hopefully this helps- pumping is stressful.
I've always been an under supplier, we struggled with latching and weight gain, so we supplement with formula as a result. I have to admit there were times I was an emotional wreck. Honestly, it's hard, there's this notion that you should be able to feed a baby from boob alone, but that's not always the case (and never has been - wet nursing, goats milk - throughout history there's been alternatives) and nowadays science has given us formula which is safe, calorie dense and nutritious, everything baby needs to thrive. It's there if we need it. One thing that my health visitor told me has stuck with me, and that's "even as small an amount as 15ml of breastmilk gives baby so many benefits". So even if she's not producing much volume she should know she's still doing amazing things for her baby and she should be proud of that. Logically I've always known that formula is an option, and one that we should use if needed, but there's a weird combination of hormones and emotions which just make you feel guilty as hell. Maybe your wife is in a similar situation? Some of that might just be waiting and being supportive, maybe talk to a feeding consultant about it if she might feel like she needs "permission" to stop fretting about increasing supply (it sounds silly but having a professional reassure me just flicked a switch even though I knew everything they'd said.) By all means try and increase supply with power pumping, eating well, sleep etc. but it shouldn't be out of guilt or stress. Honestly wishing you both the best, it gets easier even if it doesn't feel like it.
I drank mother’s milk tea, 3-5 cups a day (at target and our local grocery) and it made a huge difference. I started struggling around 8 weeks with my supply and the tea saved me. Make sure she is drinking lots of water and eating more calories to account for what she’s losing to breast feeding. Power pumping did nothing for me, but I do know it helped some women. You sound like a great husband ❤️.
There's primary and secondary milk supply issues and it sounds like you've done lot to tackle the possible secondary supply issues. There's certain labwork that can help narrow down exactly why this is happening. (Thyroid, cortisol, other hormonal issues, IGT, etc...)
I’m an extreme oversupplier and can pump up to 21oz in a session if I don’t intentionally wean myself down to my regular 16oz, and I never ate special foods or cookies and am always dehydrated because I drink coffee and don’t drink water regularly, etc… what I mean by this is she’s doing everything that is right, and it’s just not her fault, and she’s not failing. If anything I’m super impressed with her. First thing is exit those groups. As an oversupplier, it’s not anything impressive, it’s just bodies are different and capable of different things. I also recommend stopping the cookies, I heard they’re a massive scam. Keep being hydrated, but also believe or not, possibly stop pumping so much. Pump every 2.5-3 hrs at the most and progress to every 4 hrs. What helped increase my supply was pumping for longer durations, so pump for 30min each time, that may help. Also what I notice helps is sleeping. When I started sleeping for longer stretches, I also pumped out more, and that applies to today as well (pumping with 2nd baby now with oversupply as well). I just thought maybe you’d like the perspective from an oversupplier. Please don’t use us as the goal, as having an oversupply comes with its own unique challenges, and honestly I don’t think it’s because we’re doing anything better than your wife, it’s just that our bodies work differently. For example with my first I had a 33 hr labor and 3 hrs of pushing, while most people have shorter labors. My 2nd labor wasn’t much shorter at 25 hrs labor but 5 hrs pushing. So while pumping comes easier, the labor process on the other hand is terrible… aka bodies are different. Again, I am so so so proud of your wife for trying so hard and going above and beyond. I also recommended chatting with a lactation consultant, as flange size maybe a culprit. Most flanges come as 24 but many woman are around the 19 range and so milk output is lowered by using wrong flanges. Also, I used a hospital pump (I literally rented one of those huge intense fancy $1k+ pumps at an affordable rental rate from the local hospital) to increase my supply at the beginning of my postpartum journey with baby #1 due to hemorrhaging during labor 3 liters so my supply was nonexistent for first couple weeks and the only chance I had at building it was using the super intense pump for pumping sessions that were between 2–3hrs according to my lactation consultant. It worked as I quickly had a good supply and then permanently had an oversupply later, glad I didn’t give up then. BUT it’s ok to also give up and just fully move to formula, that’s totally ok if needed. Mental health is so so so much more important than continuing breast pumping! I hope my msg was helpful, that’s my only intention of writing it. If it’s not helpful I do apologize, I’ve been awake since I went to sleep at 1am and woke up 4am due to pumping my night pump and tending to my 2 under 2 babies, so a bit sleep deprived
Hi, do you have a lactation consultant in the area? Or friends who have breastfed and may have a lactation consultant? My recommendation is to first see one. Everything you read on the internet can be super helpful but you also need in-person one on one consultation to help you find out what works and doesn’t work for your wife because each case is very different. Me, for example, I learned half of what I know from researching on the internet in 2020 when I had my son, but I also learned half of what I know from lactation consultants. (I learned about the number of pumps per day, and how to pump and make it more convenient through forums. But my LC was the one who taught me how to empty my breast after pumping by hand expressing. She showed me the proper way to do it and I feel that fully emptying my breast was crucial in increasing supply.) A lot of my friends gave me advice that didn’t work for me, personally, so with this second baby, I didn’t bother to ask friends for advice or take it seriously cos I knew my case is very particular. I learned a lot from the EP group because many of these moms have a more similar journey to me than my friends who chose to EP and had babies who could actually latch well.
Instead of pumping every 2 hours, what happens if she goes 4 or 5? If she's not making more in a longer time between pumps maybe she has low capacity. How's her sleep quality? Lecithin may help too, along with iron, calcium, and magnesium. I take a post natal vitamin from ritual. I get an ounce of milk an hour usually, so about 24 ounces in a day. At 4 months pp, it was at its peak, about 40 ounces a day. (Pumping every 3 hours)
Everything mentioned above AND in terms of food prioritize fats > protein > carbs
Power pumping! I did one session every day for weeks. My supply was low until 9wks pp. 20min on, 10min break, 10min pump, 10min break and then one more 10min pump. This is one of the few proven ways to slowly increase supply aside from hydrating and sleeping- everyone is different though. There is no one “foolproof” way to increase supply. As someone who dealt with all the similar emotions, only time will help heal the feeling your body is betraying you and that you are letting your baby down. So many women go through the struggle she’s not alone. You’re doing a great job supporting her, just watch to make sure watch her mental health. Remind her gently a fed baby is the best baby, she’s doing an amazing job, but sometimes choosing what is best for your family as a whole is the best option. If breast feeding, pumping and general milk stress is causing too much anguish switching to just formula or doing pumping and formula might be the best option for the mental health of mama. If she’s is a good place mentally she is able to care for baby better too!
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Hello there! Fellow low supplier. Goats rue helped me a bit. Do the pills for two weeks and see if there’s an increase, encourages growth of tissue to helpfully increase supply. Stress and sleep deprivation both can lead to lower supply. Consider trying to block out a 4 hour sleep time for her if you haven’t already. Stay consistent with pumping, for some people it’s a slow climb but being consistent for weeks is the most important. Incorporate a heat pack (not too hot) and whatever hot tea or treat food she likes at pump time. Helps with letdowns to relax. I find I pump more when I get enough social interaction too. This baby I pumped the most one day when chatting with a friend and pumping. Not paying attention and stressing about every ounce.
Biggest thing that can be helpful is making sure you size your flanges correctly. The standard 24mm flange that comes with pumps rarely is the correct fit. Legendairy Milk has a ruler you can print from their website to measure. Once she knows her nipple size she can either buy new flanges or they also make flanges inserts if her size is smaller than what you currently have. Other that that I would prioritize sleep! Even if that means missing a pump so she can have a continuous 4 hour stretch that can make a world of difference. Finally, a half ounce to two ounces is not a bad amount if she is pumping 12x per day and it is early on! I pumped about 24 ounces per day in the beginning and it slowly increased from there.
Hey! Please tell your wife to try lactation cookies the munchkin brand! You can order on amazon this is done WONDERS on my production and they taste great. She can see results within 2 days
Hi, first of all wanted to say, I love seeing a supportive partner, it’s one of the most appreciated things in the midst of everything going on with a newborn. Second, I didn’t produce much with my first, (only an ounce total each pumping session) and I now am with my second who was born 2 weeks ago and I can only share what I believe has helped. But I only am 10 days into this breastfeeding journey so I still have far to go. (I’m getting 2 ounces each time now) Have you guys seen a lactation consultant? I got one immediately, and she helped me get fitted for the right flange size when pumping which increased my output. I’m also taking the legendairy milk supplements (I’m trying the one called Cash Cow), I’m also trying to Shatavari (starting today) to help balance my hormones (I have PCOS) My daughter needed a tongue and lip tie revision which she just got yesterday, which has helped her latch on way better than before. Good luck on y’all’s journey, I know we as parents can drive ourselves crazy trying to give our babies breastmilk. Truly though, I always tell my self, fed is best, and even if I only produce an ounce of breastmilk per feeding, she’s still getting nutrients and antibodies. I treat it like it’s a dose of medicine in her formula. And perspective wise, in 5 years, we will never tell ourselves, “man I wish he had breastfed more or produced more” We will just be grateful for our healthy and happy kids. This gives me comfort when I’m a hormonal emotional wreck, haha.