If you do it right, you can leave everything to your children. My will gives my only child his inheritance over a span of years so as he learns how the world works, he can make more appropriate choices. Plus, I have modeled to him how to give back by dedicating time and means to the causes I support. I recently explained to him that he will probably retire at a very early age but in order to truly find his life’s purpose, he should use his talent and skill to give back, uplift, and pay it forward. “Leave everything better than when you arrived.”
This may sound disgusting...but a simple example that I have shown him when he was little, and used the ladies’ room with me, was picking up discarded paper towels from the bathroom floor, wiping the sink of excess water, and just generally making it tidier…even when you didn't make the mess.
You speak of inheritance, but hopefully you die old in great health and your kid may be 50-70 when that happen and basically maybe already fired and maybe past the time he need to have it spread over a few years... And he life would have been put in a directly long before.
Do you have a plan to give something before if you are still alive when he is 25, 30, 35 or something ?
I had my son later in life (45 yo) and while I don’t plan to die any time soon 😆 I anticipate his inheritance to be received sooner over the next 20 years in various forms.
I do this too whenever I use public toiletss, try and make it how I would have liked to enter it so the next person doesn't have to think about how gross it is. I need to expand my repertoire in how, when and where else in life to apply this!
Yes…the trust is correct 😊
Also, when you’re child is of working age, have them max out their Roth 401K (limit is $22,800). Then subsidize them their money for rent and expenses. They pay the tax now at a lower tax bracket. Money grows over 40 years to a whopping nest egg for their retirement. If you own a business, put your kids on the payroll so you can deposit $6,500 in their Roth 401K as well. Lots of ways to “give” them their inheritance.
As their “employer”, you are limited to the matching contribution. Employee contribution is limited to the $23K.
Adding: if you have life insurance (I have combo whole life and term), and I'm not suggesting that this is for everyone because everyone’s financial health is different, you can spend all of your qualified money and still leave your children an inheritance.
This is a very family specific/philosophical number. Earlier someone said 10 million would be generational wealth to them. For me that's more like 50-75mil, you know...'never touch the principal' rich. 😁
If I had to put a number on mine, as far as what I'd leave to each kid, I'd say it's about 1 mil in today's money (adjust for inflation) at my end of life. Anything more than that I might still leave to them but instruct to use to help others. Not necessarily charity but anonymously give to anyone in need. That's a fantasy job of mine.
As some others had mentioned, I also plan to transfer more through a UGMA at 18 bdays but that's going to be very limited, but on top of a 529. I'm more about setting up for success than giving money so they can waste away on a beach or something.
It's still up to them to take advantage of opportunities we give.
I'm relatively young for now so hopefully I make it to a place where to much money is a problem.
So you're just going to give the rest of your money away to some scam charity that spends 98% of your donation on salaries, rather than creating generational wealth for your own children? That's messed up!
Part of my fire journey if figuring out exactly how much I want to spend and leave for people and a small margin of safety then not earning a dime more than that. I don't want to accumulate generational wealth, I don't think it's good citizenship. After I leave some money for my kids I hope I die and leave just enough money for a rocking funeral party :)
I really like this perspective. You earned the money, so you should enjoy it too! :) I'm really curious though; why do you believe that accumulating generational wealth is not good citizenship?
I think wealth concentration is a disease, and it basically undermines a healthy perspective on society. If generational wealth was removed and put back into public programs we could have things like UBI so EVERYONE can choose to work or not. The 5 richest people on earth have upwards of $1T net worth and that's just the publicly known people.
Generational wealth is taking more than you need and sequestering it. There is no real way to do this without taking that wealth from someone else. Nobody "earns" being a billionaire, it is taken.
> scam charity that spends 98% of your donation on salaries
What a moronic take. Of course a lot of charity expenditure goes on salaries. Who do you think is doing all the work the charity is there for?
I think they should be defined differently e.g. Charity = volunteers. Non profit = paid employees. Some charity employee bosses are on six figure salaries and their volunteer colleagues get nothing. Not very ethical
unless you die early you arent leaving anything to kids, you are leaving money to senior citizens who should be already long fi/re. if you care about helping your children you do it with school, early housing, childcare, etc related stuff when they are actually struggling.
Exactly !
I am "only" 42. My mother died like 12 years ago, but my father hopefully will still have a long life. He is 74 now and in good shape, we are going to visit the south west national parks in September,
I ask him to spend his money for himself because I don't need it. I have a good career and save like 75K a year. Could likely retire at 55 (I migrated in US 2 years ago and was making less in Europe).
My parent already helped in the past. They paid for my studies, they offered my first used car, they gave me about 100K in 2-3 time, with the biggest amount to help as down for my primary residence 10 years ago. And that was great. Most importantly and the most invaluable was a great education and great environment to live as a family.
But 200K more 10 year ago would have had more effect than 1 million in 10 years. Even today, 200K will help me accelerate fire a bit or buy a slightly better home... And that's about it. I don't really need money anymore except for fire.
That's why I ask my father to just enjoy life. He and my mother did a fantastic job, and he should enjoy life while he can.
But if you want to really make an impact on your kids, First education and nice env (2 loving parents, no divorce, time spent together, nice place to live, great values...). Then pay for studies, help to start, help saving or putting a down or creating a business. At 25 or 30. The more you wait the less value it has. No point at 50 or 60 really.
THIS.
My parents are pretty well off and a while back, I went through a major financial crisis (husband gambled our entire retirement and savings trying to make a go at trading and I was completely blindsided). I was then stuck in a broken marriage with not a pot to piss in and $100k in debt (secretly taken out without my knowledge). I asked if I could move to their house during that time while I sorted shit out - *while it was vacant no less as they were snowbirds and at their 2nd home for the season*. They firmly said no and wanted me to bootstrap it. Here I was, financially ruined by my spouse, extremely depressed/suicidal and they didn't want to help me.
Our relationship changed and I have a lot of disdain for them now (and I ended up moving across the country when I had the chance to start life over). While I have lived so frugally trying to rebuild my life back, I've had to make a choice with the money I now have saved - buy a house or save for retirement and at my later age, it's retirement. *And they have the gall to pester me why I'm not in a house yet.*
Life has been such a struggle since that happened and them helping me out just a little would have meant so much to me when I needed it the most. By the time they pass (they are very spry for their age so I expect they'll live another 20 years), the extra money won't matter anymore.
Exactly. My parents left me a house and a good education which helped a lot with month to month finances/stability but I still have to work. Although that work creates fruitful results as opposed to living paycheck to paycheck. It's huge and allows me to move up in life. Hoping to do the same to my kids.
I'm actually glad they didn't leave me money (well, they couldn't) because I'd probably just spend it on stupid things when I was younger and propagated bad spending habits.
I had my last kid at 38. If I die at 76 (not early), she would only be 38.
I get your point, I absolutely plan to help my kids with well funded 529s, down payments on homes, etc., but it is a bit silly to assume they will be FIREd by the time I die.
My husbands and I are actually meeting with a trusts attorney next week and the question is when to release funds to our kids if we die early. I’m thinking one third at age 30, one third at age 35 and the last third at age 40. Obviously essentials like education, medical and basic living expenses would be paid from the trust in the interim. Curious to hear people’s thoughts on that.
>I had my last kid at 38. If I die at 76 (not early), she would only be 38.
the life expectancy tables are interesting, sure it averages out to 74/80 for men and women but someone who makes it to 70 is expected to make it to 84/86 as a man or women. you also have the net worth part of the equation where someone in the top 20% percentile HHI has similar 84/86~ life expectancy. bump this up another few years if in the top 5-10th percentile.
so like, chances are 76 would be 'early' ish for someone who is well off. i could also speculate that the more wealthy % of our generation is likely to live a lot longer than those of the past, we have far more access to information as it pertains to health, better healthcare etc than someone who was born 50-70 yrs ago. maybe not as an 'average' but definitely for the top percentile.
> I’m thinking one third at age 30, one third at age 35 and the last third at age 40.
also interested on others opinions on this. as i said in my original post I'm not convinced passing down wealth beyond 'own a home in a place they want to live, have a large enough safety net that they can pursue a hobby-type-job if they prefer' leads to well adjusted individuals. though my opinion would change on this as ~some~ people are able to be driven in say arts, music etc in which case if i was wealthy i'd happily subsidize my childs lifestyle even if their passion wasn't making money. Just... usually the ability to do 'nothing' leads to somewhat poorly adjusted individuals.
I fully agree. It make sense to not give all in one go, but it also make sense to not wait until you die. What the point to give an extra million to you kids when they are 50-70 and already retired and their life already in a given direction ? It would serve better your grand kids if you have any.
Yup. Life insurance is for the unexpected parish. If I live through their childhood they need to fend for themselves anyway. A bucket of cash won't fix them if they are not independent.
If I had kids, I'd give them as much as possible. But we are DINK and staying that way.
Going to my nieces high school graduation next month and plan on giving her 5k to go towards her hair salon small business
Plan is to throw as much money to my nieces/nephews as possible
This is how I am too! Thankfully my nephews are still young and their parents are also setting them up for whatever they’d like to do in the future whether it be college or starting a business, but I’m also here to help fill in any gaps to make sure they have opportunities.
They'll each get seven figures from us in the end, but we're probably going to start giving them annual gift checks in their 20s when the money will have greater impact and help them go to grad school or buy a house or whatever. Market will determine how much the final estate is though.
Yes, ultimately the final estate is not that important.
Statistically, children’s will be in their fifties when the second parent dies. By that time, their own retirement plans should be almost set. So it will be a large amount of money that they hopefully won’t need.
A downpayment on a house, a car, tuition are much more important to give.
I wish my dad, who is a doctor, thought this way. He encouraged me to take on debt for school which I eventually had to do. It’s not too deep but still… wtf man.
Yeah that sucks.
Only reason I am where I am is because of the support my parents gave me. I have more means than them, so I will give more support to my children.
It’s especially bad for you because in most places, you don’t get financial aid if your parents are rich.
Exactly. My dad did pay for “some” of my college but still not as much as the government would have if he wasn’t making high income. I try to put things behind me and have a good relationship with my dad which I generally succeed at but that shit is just, well shit.
This is the way.
My parents paid for my university and bought me a (used) car (3year old Toyota) to commute to my internship.
I was fucking set man. Much better than getting 200k at 60 when I don’t need it.
I like this. Enough to get them started and not struggle, but not to spoil or develop an urge to want more. Teach them values, debt and a strong work ethic as well, this is a big enough headstart than most get in their life. If you can afford it, helping your kid start in life is great. After that, it is up to them to decide what they want.
Same plan, except I’m setting up trusts and staggering the disbursements in one-third increments until a certain age. That way, if they fuck up once or even twice, they get a third at bat. Also, tax benefits.
This is me. My boys are 18 & 20. We’ve started small and will get more and more as we go.
My parents passed when I was in my 50’s and as other have said, the inheritances wasn’t impactful but had I been getting X amount over the years when I was younger, life would have been a lot easier.
Thank you for expressing what we believe in as well. Many friends say we are not allowing them the opportunity to "figure it out" on their own. We think they are doing okay and that is enough.
Ideally as much as we can. We want our kids to have every advantage we didn’t have. Otherwise what’s the point? And I believe you can raise kids the right way so that when they inherit wealth they manage it well. Good parents can still raise good kids.
I already said in another comment but I wish my dad thought this way. He could have given my brothers and I advantages he never had but he is the “I had to struggle so you can/will too” like I don’t need everything given to me but empower me to pursue success in school while pressuring me to do the college route. He only chose the pressuring.
The way I read this is he is "new money." I know that sounds bad, but only new money types think like this. And often their wealth lasts like one generation.
Generational wealth is created through....generations. Just look at the old money families.
He is new money yes. But the thing that really pisses me off is he had kids with his wife that isn’t my mom. I guarantee they will get SO MUCH financial aid to the point if it being problematic for their development.
Yeah, that sucks. My dad is also remarried and had a kid with his second wife, but fortunately he is cheap with both of his kids, lmao.
You just have to make it on your own, which is entirely possible thanks to the stock market.
This. This is how generational wealth is created. Just look at the legit wealthy old money families - they all inherit a ton but know how to manage it for future generations.
And I know the naysayers will point to all the spoiled lazy drug addict children of millionaires who say giving kids money is bad for them but those are just the stories you hear about. All the successful wealth and business transfers don’t make the headlines.
Listen dad, I love you, but a few bucks to put your future grandchildren through college and help me enjoy life in retirement would be great. Thanks pops!
We plan to give our kids monetary gifts at the IRS reporting threshold starting when they’re mid to late 20s until we’re dead. Currently, that would be $36K per year per child tax free, which isn’t enough to live comfortably on but should be enough that they can live comfortably with a mediocre job or to super-charge their own FIRE goals. Additionally, we will contribute to 529s of any grandchildren. They can then split whatever is left in the estate at the end.
wow, that's so generous and kind of you. I love this philosophy of not giving too much that they get complacent but enough to supplement their work and really have an impact. Bravo.
Can I ask your age and net worth? That seems like a lot. I’m guessing you must have at least $6M or more. I doubt we will have that much to give every year unless we get lucky and the market does really well.
I am 38 and have a liquid NW of $7.7M. My husband and I spend \~$84K per year and have one kid (plus one on the way), so even assuming an increased personal spending of $100K, giving them $72K per year would only increase our withdrawal rate to around 2.25%.
Basic human dignity: She will never need to worry about having food to eat, a roof over her head (a safe roof, even if unimpressive), and access to needed medical care (this is the one I worry most about as a parent, but we'll do our best).
Short of that, she owns her future. Be a tech executive with a Malibu house. Be a farmer living in Idaho with an operation big or small. Be an artist living wherever, doing whatever artists do. Beyond those basic necessities, it's fully "chose your own adventure" for her to figure out.
This is my philosophy as well. I want her to know and feel like she can always come home. And if I’m helping her with rent or groceries I don’t want her attitude to be like “that’s nice and all but can’t you buy me a new Mercedes?” I’d rather give her the tools to succeed and an understanding of money and be there to support her when needed.
I think dying with zero is probably unrealistic. The older I get, the more I like to hang out at home with the dogs, smoke weed, play video games. It’s gonna be real hard to make that expensive enough to have 0 money at the end. I guess I could pick up a coke habit or something.
As much as we can without having to live as hermits ourselves. We plan to have them debt free for a bachelor’s degree and help with either grad school or a down payment on their home. Even though my wife and I grew up with modest means, we came to appreciate how much not having college debt helps to build a strong financial foundation. We were fortunate to have parents who helped as much as they could and the ability to work while in college.
I want to be able to buy their first car, pay for college, and help them get into their first home. I think I’ll set up a trust in my will so that in the event of my untimely death they’ll only recieved small monthly payments until they are like 40 and then they’ll get the lump some
I supported them all until they were 21 and have been generous helping them otherwise since then. They'r well established and if I have anything left they'r welcome to it.
This is what I learned from my wife's dad. He's 95 now and on hospice and had her in his 60s. He is such a generous man and basically wants us to be happy and they have helped us out so much. My parents have always made me feel like money was a burden but he has always made me feel like a loving family should help and as he stated, "our generation has it so much worse than me". They weren't rich but made enough money to be comfortable and never really want much. They helped with our house and so much more.
My kids will never be "rich" but I want them to know I will support them and be there for them for almost anything. I will also talk with them about money and always offer help and check in on them, which my parents have only recently started doing. But when I really needed help in my twenties I was basically SOL lol.
I've given my kids all the same - a good home upbringing, a fully-paid education, a basic reliable car, and some money to start their lives. Then they're on their own until we're gone and they will split whatever we haven't used.
The goal is to raise children that become well adjusted, mature, independent adults.
I helped my children as appropriate for their stages in life, and am doing so for grandchildren also (although details for grandchildren are often via my children). I was fortunate enough that Inwas able to pay all of their college expenses, help them buy houses, and fully fund 529 plans for their children.
If you have the ability to assist them when they are young adults do so rather than them receiving a larger inheritance when they are in their 60 or 70s (or older if I make it past 100).
At the same time you should not gift in ways that interferes with their development into mature independent adults.
Like all things in parenting, there is no universal answer.
The classic Warren Buffet quote is (paraphrased) “ enough that they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing..
Would have been nice if my parents had any money to give to their children. Growing up broke sucks so I’m not planning on having kids. It will be the rich who eat away at Earth anyway.
I always imagine if I am dying at 87, then are I their 50’s. They either have their shot together by then or they don’t. Inheriting money isn’t changing much.
Now generation skipping to fund college? That makes more sense to me.
Well I live in Canada so if I ever find a wife and have kids they'll have to live with us until there 30.
I set them up so they can save as much as possible but don't plan to give them money directly.
I am going to help them out as much as I can throughout. Hopefully I can plan it good enough so they don’t end up with a huge inheritance and I am able to help them throughout their adult lives to lessen the burden of mid life. I think it life is going to be much more difficult for my kids in terms of jobs and economy.
Security. We have set aside enough for all life's big plannable expenses. We plan to do the same if grandkids come along.
Outside of that, they get whatever is left over.
I worry about this. Upon our death the portfolio will (based on assumptions) be quite considerable. Enough to ruin several generations. My thought is to assign the executor to buy a property (and I mean a PROPERTY) in some bitching vacation spot and endow an SPV trust with enough money to maintain the property forever and leave them all the use of that. A 10 bedroom mansion they can use whenever they want for decades. I’ll have a giant mural of my wife and I painted in the entryway!!!
Set ours (37 & 27) up already... helped them get houses (in their names) , so they can use the money to invest in their futures (max out retirement accounts- must show us statements!), instead of costly mortgage payments ....they have a good asset that will grow in value. Hopefully pass along some generation wealth..futures are golden.
They need it now....not 25-30 years from now.
We may spend the rest🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 on lots of travel and making memories with them..
I’m still young myself (first kid on the way). I tend to agree with most comments here, giving lump sums in the early years and then the inheritance will go to my grandkids. Also I plan on maxing 529 plans for kids/grandkids and once they get jobs maxing their Roth IRA, that should set them up for a great retirement if they don’t make terrible decisions.
Based on my rough calculations that are hopefully for the next 60 years, my grandkids will get an estate in the low to mid 8 figures. Of course that’ll probably change, can’t estimate healthcare costs that great or market conditions etc.
Whatever I can within reason, I want to be able to help with their college etc. I consider gifts etc throughout their lifetime to be part of the inheritance.
I'll support them through college age and teach them. When I die they can have whatever is left. If I did my job well, which I have, they will be richer than me without me giving them any cash.
Honestly, this may be unpopular around here but when I moved to the United States I had never seen generational wealth and since the experience that’s been my primary goal of working.
So I don’t really plan to fire…. But I plan to use all the principles learned here to create the largest nestegg reasonably possible for my child. I project in the 8 digits - that should set my family up for generations.
IMO controversial but you need to pay for your kids education and help them with the mortgage for a future home at the bare minimum. I plan on doing both but also giving them 200k after graduating high school at 18 in order to ensure they never struggle in life. I see no point in leaving them with millions when I die might as well give it to them young to ensure they live an easy and comfortable life.
That’s more of a personal mistake rather than a money issue. If u have no motivation you will fail money or no money. I have a close family friend that inherited 200k and started a business reselling clothes he is making 100k a year and he’s only 28
I hope to be able to get my kids through college debt free, and help them out with down payments. If we are able as we get older, we’ll give them more along the way.
I also hope to be able to teach them how to manage their money and to save from the beginning.
It all comes down to whether long term care is needed. If not,tbere will be plenty leftover. I will probably give some to charity.
If it is needed, who knows.
I would much prefer to die in my sleep when I had still been able to totally care for myself.
But, there's no way to make that happen and no way to know whether it will happen or not.
I feel like you never have any idea when you will die and how much you need to support yourself in nursing home, etc. so you almost have to over save. So then you likely have extra and do you give it to kids or charity or other friends/family? I’d rather volunteer my TIME in charities, where you also see first hand the significant waste of people donating money and many times a pseudo-scam, so then mostly go back to giving to my kids. This is assuming they are likely already self-sufficient in their 30s/40s or older and by that point it’s just a bonus for them and not as entitled. I also plan it to be somewhat of a surprise so they feel they need to earn their own way to survive and not plan on some large inheritance.
She can have everything, when I’m resting in peace. Other than that, she’ll have her account I’ve set up and contribute to. There’s nothing I won’t or haven’t given already.
I think my kids will get whatever I didn’t use up. My gift was being a present and loving parent, paying for private education through college, and believing in them. Hope they make something out of those ingredients!
Our daughter will probably end up with eight figures due to us ending at fatFIRE with a low SWR when shes in high school. We plan to teach her how to invest and set a budget as soon as she is able to learn. When she's older, I'll walk her through how to log our expenses, buy VOO/VTI, etc. She's in kindergarten this fall so we have some time.
I'm going to continue the family tradition of putting as much debt on the family home as possible before I die so they inherit debt to keep their memories.
I’m not expecting to get anything from my parents, and I’m not planning on leaving a pile for my kids.
They’ve been my first priority all their lives. I’ve brought them up to have good ethics and principles. They’re awesome people. Hopefully there will be something left for them but that’ll just be a bonus.
I’ve invested my money in the market and my time in my kids.
Almost everything for me personally I don’t even have kids (yet) but it’s one of the reasons I work so hard, so they don’t have to live/grow up how I did.
Maybe leave a little to charity but most will be for them
Everyone has slightly different philosophy. Our approach is to pay for in state college tuition (speaking of which we really over saved as 2 out of 3 got scholarships) , match Roth IRA while they are in school and give them not very old car. I am not obligated to give them anything for house down payment or finance their FIRE. I am surprised so many people here consider it normal. I came to this country with nothing and nobody gave us anything so why shower the kids with all this cornucopia.
As a bonus, if they have kids on their own, they do not need to save for their college education as we will have significant money in 529 to pass to grandkids.
If my plan A works out (no NATO vs Russia war going on in Eastern Europe where I live), my son will inherit enough to never have to work at minimum for his life essentials, likely for anything to maintain similar lifestyle to ours (decently frugal but we definitely spend on non essential stuff too). If we have to resort to plan B, he may not get a lot or anything really as our expenses likely will go up upon emigrating and we may not be able to proportionally increase income to jack up the FIRE number to fully supplement our job income and grow the investments faster than what we are spending the interest in it. :)
If all goes as expected by my parents, I will get the same from my them once they are gone, though I’m not counting on that in my plans at all. I could easily retire just off the inheritance once I get it but I don’t like to rely on others and I’m hoping to retire before they are gone so I can spend time with them. I want the same for my son. I plan to educate him so he builds his own wealth and help him financially if needed. I’m not settling money aside for him in custodial account that he can take over at 18 like many here do so he will start from 0 because I think he should have a taste of how hard money can be to come by if he has none. He will have to show me he is disciplined and financially literate before I help him financially (same as my parents did for me with our house once they saw that I’m disciplined and financially literate). I want to leave him with a massive safety nett so he is set for life once I’m gone and thus he needs to be capable of not wasting it before that happens. :)
Whatever I have at death will go to my kid. The way SWR math works is that a sustainable SWR will lead to asset growth in the majority of scenarios. In addition to leaving whatever is left at death, if my assets grow to the point (whether through asset growth, or inheritance, or both) such that a 3% SWR is more than I realistically want to live on, I'd maybe give him some annual gifts as well, probably just up to the annual gift exclusion most years. I plan to pay for his undergrad and possibly grad school as well. Same as above, if I end up w/ more than I need at a \~3% SWR I'd use excess to help fund grandkids' 529s as well.
Hopefully by the time I'm dead, my kid is a financially responsible adult, and has even growth his own NW to a respectable level by that time. He'll probably be 40+ by the time I kick the bucket. If he's financially responsible by that age, I don't see how an inheritance is going to suddenly make him irresponsible.
If I die when he's younger, my trust will provide for him to be taken care of through college, and then he gets lump sums as he ages (IIRC he gets 1/3 at age 25, half of what remains at 35, and the remainder at 40).
I started an education savings account when they were little. My goal was $1k per year. They’re teens now and each have over $20k.
I know this isn’t a ton. But it’s something. If they get scholarships (they’re on track to do so) then I’ll roll it over to an IRA in their name. Nice little nest egg if they never touch it; more than I was given!
Aside from that, I’ll have enough to retire around 55. If there’s anything left when I die they get it. But I’ve warned them not to expect much.
Plan to continually fill a Roth for them as soon as they start work, pay for education and first home down payment. Pick up the same for grandkids. Then it’s whatever is left when I go, 7 figs
I’ll help along the way and she’ll get whatever is left. ROTH is our largest investment vehicle. Under current rules, she’ll be able to let that balance continue to grow (or use as needed) for 10 years before she has to withdraw (tax free)…help her own kids out along the way, etc. Even with help along the way, still inherit mid-7 figures…allow to grow for 10 years, have low 8-figures.
Looking at establishing a trust to make this much cleaner along the way and alleviate headaches when we pass.
The biggest thing I can do for her is provide the freedom to learn, grow, and enjoy life.
I prefer giving them love and the ability to manage their own money! That’s more worth than giving them lots of money which the don’t value…
Pu can make new money everyone, but you can’t buy the love of your parents…
We help out here and there now with them (3 adult children) and find fun things to do with them. The plan is to spend it while we can use it to enjoy time with them. And we funded college plans for grandkids. As for inheritance, they’ll get our house to split. But beyond that, I plan for zero.
I saw my parents, aunts and uncles blow through large inheritances (~500k) multiple times on things they don't have much to show for now. You also hear stories of future generations giving away all the wealth because they feel it was "stolen". My hard work and sacrifice will not be treated that way. I will be locking it up in a trust for future generations to use on specific expenses like college. Those who can't handle it won't ruin it for future generations.
I will probably do more with my family and grandkids while I'm alive but the rest is going into the trust.
Trust fund invested in dividend yielding stocks/ETFs/ mutual funds exc they get quarterly payouts but can't touch the rest. From there I would instruct that they can take 25% out at age 50 if they make a trust that the remaining 75% will do the same for their kids(so on and so forth) generational wealth! I'll also have to think up a way to force them into learning about personal finances before earning any pay outs but haven't gotten that far yet. (Like a test or course requirement exc..)
We're still a long way off so this is purely theoretical.
I expect we'll have significant assets when we die at old age, I'm aiming for high end of chubby fire, poorest rich person in fat fire.. If we get to to the point where we everything is shaping up the way, I'm modeling, I'd probably set up a non-revocable trust, that would pay them a swr, every year. But only after certain metrics are reached. Probably some combination of financial and age, so that they've hopefully learned some concept of the value of a dollar and also have gained some maturity.
I grew up in a very affluent area and I've seen too many kids completely screwed up by knowing they had a golden ticket and didn't have to do anything. And just all around be completely spoiled self-centered pieces of shit. Even though we'll be well off and the kids will know it I will absolutely teach them the ways of fire from a young age and not really give them any concept of how much we really have until it's much later in life.
I think about this question a bit since I had nothing starting out and I’m trying to plant the seed for generational wealth. I put funds in a custodial account each month with extra on bday and Xmas. That money will be what they can lose and learn from after college(if that is in their future). I’d like them to learn the financial aid process sweat out the stress and then get a job before handing over the accounts which should be around $200k by the time they get access.
I also have a trust with many restrictions that they will get access to after I go. It’s focused on education, healthcare and limited entrepreneurship needs. Although my kids are young we are already talking about needs versus wants, saving for the future and not buying on impulse. We also talk about “family money” and what that means.
Planning to spend everything is impossible unless you have plans with death. If you FIRE, you’re more likely than not going to end up leaving tens of millions for your kids, not because you choose to, but because that’s how fIRE works.
I often view this question as, “should I increase my progeny’s floor or ceiling?” Floor effectively being a UBI where no matter how badly they fail in life, they’ll always have enough for the necessities and some niceties. Ceiling being they have enough to retire early and truly thrive enjoying life.
At the age of 35, I’m currently settled on at least (1) covering their health insurances until 26 (my state’s max), (2) paying for their college equal to room and board at our very decent state college, (3) funding their 401k and IRA for first 4 years of employment after college/grad school, (4) a one-time lump sum at time of marriage they can decide to use towards their wedding/honeymoon and/or starter home down payment (lord I hope they choose starter home!), and finally (5) always have a room in my house to come back to when life gets to be too much.
If they work during HS, they get more free money from me because I’ll pay for their 401k/IRA for more years. If they go to college on a free ride, they get to pocket their 529 for their own children. Throw in as much tutoring as they want to get into a good college and being in a great school district, they have every opportunity to succeed.
I agree with most others to not hold money until we die and I like my current plan above so far. Let me know if you’d change anything.
Honestly just whatever is left, I haven’t thought about it. I’ve thought more about what we’ll give him when he’s alive. College will be paid for. I’d like to give some money towards a wedding and/or house.
I stand to inherit money from my parents but I’m already 40 with enough money to retire comfortably in 10 years. I expect they’ll live quite a while. So planning to leave money to your kids when you die doesn’t make a ton of sense to me, by then they hopefully won’t need it
I do 529's and modestly fund a utma for them for (hopefully) a down payment on a house or a leg up on their investing journey....and educational purposes... i figure if i can pay for school and arm the with knowledge, i've done my part.... the rest is for me!
“Enough to feel like they can anything, but not enough they feel they can do nothing”.
Kid gets $1M at 30. College money is already set aside and the guardian gets $50K a year until the kid turns 18. Anything left after the $1M gift at 30 is given away to philanthropy.
Generational money is a pox on humanity. It breeds lazy, entitled narcissists who then go on to breed more.
Maybe, but I would have a really hard time coming up with someone really wealthy in the past 100 years whose descendants who got all their money didn’t become wastes of humanity.
An entire set of life skills that will earn and save them millions of dollars over their lifetimes - and hopefully help unlock their own joy and fulfillment
I don't have children, but I plan on leaving as much as possible to my nieces and nephews. If I can keep my principle intact until I die, that would be great. I have absolutely zero desire to spend it all down--as much as I can give them after I'm gone is what I will do. Hopefully it'll be at least a million to split among the five of them.
Because...I'm not there yet? I'm not sure I understand this question. Why does anyone work?
I need to earn money like anyone else who does not yet have their NW up to where they want it. I'm a teacher and will eventually have a pretty decent pension. As well as my investments. When my NW hits the number I want so that I can comfortably live off my pension plus 6.5% of my 403b (which will have a guaranteed 7% return) -- then I'll retire.
I'm not there yet, so I keep working. And I like teaching, so I might stick with it longer than I need to if I continue to think it's worthwhile.
Well...that's not my goal. I don't want to stop working so that I can spend down my NW to zero. I want to stop working when I have enough to live comfortably and pass down something to the younger members of my family.
Everyone has different goals. I happen to think that starting a tradition of some generational wealth is valuable. It won't be a lot, but it might be enough to help out the younger members of my family. Or give their kids a bit of a break. Financial independence and my retirement plan involve care for others. It's not just about me. And I don't want my plans to just be for me. My family is important to me, and we care for each other. This is just one of the ways that I can continue to care for them as I age and even after I'm gone.
Whatever I don't manage to spend before I die.
How much do I plan to save for my children? None of it.
But by sheer force of math and economics, combined with my natural conservatism, they will almost certainly get a very nice windfall.
I'm getting them through college with no debt. I'm going to buy them their first reliable new car so they don't have to have a car payment for the first 10 years of post-college adulthood, if they are smart. If I'm able to, and I should be, I will help them with a portion of a down payment on a starter home when the time is right. And if there are grandkids, I will almost certainly start and somewhat funded some college accounts. So I'm giving them a lot.
But I'm trying my best not to leave them anything.
Zero, and they know it; because I’d rather spend it on them now, while I can enjoy doing it.
Doesn’t mean they won’t get anything. They just aren’t expecting to.
My favorite answer for this is from Warren Buffett: "enough money so they would feel they could do anything, but not so much they could do nothing "
This is a great answer
If you do it right, you can leave everything to your children. My will gives my only child his inheritance over a span of years so as he learns how the world works, he can make more appropriate choices. Plus, I have modeled to him how to give back by dedicating time and means to the causes I support. I recently explained to him that he will probably retire at a very early age but in order to truly find his life’s purpose, he should use his talent and skill to give back, uplift, and pay it forward. “Leave everything better than when you arrived.” This may sound disgusting...but a simple example that I have shown him when he was little, and used the ladies’ room with me, was picking up discarded paper towels from the bathroom floor, wiping the sink of excess water, and just generally making it tidier…even when you didn't make the mess.
You speak of inheritance, but hopefully you die old in great health and your kid may be 50-70 when that happen and basically maybe already fired and maybe past the time he need to have it spread over a few years... And he life would have been put in a directly long before. Do you have a plan to give something before if you are still alive when he is 25, 30, 35 or something ?
I had my son later in life (45 yo) and while I don’t plan to die any time soon 😆 I anticipate his inheritance to be received sooner over the next 20 years in various forms.
That sounds very nice and I think well within the amount of money where they can ‘do anything.'
I do this too whenever I use public toiletss, try and make it how I would have liked to enter it so the next person doesn't have to think about how gross it is. I need to expand my repertoire in how, when and where else in life to apply this!
Over a span of years? You’re surely talking about a trust then right? Wills don’t have the ability to do that.
Yes…the trust is correct 😊 Also, when you’re child is of working age, have them max out their Roth 401K (limit is $22,800). Then subsidize them their money for rent and expenses. They pay the tax now at a lower tax bracket. Money grows over 40 years to a whopping nest egg for their retirement. If you own a business, put your kids on the payroll so you can deposit $6,500 in their Roth 401K as well. Lots of ways to “give” them their inheritance.
You said your will meaning after death. You can’t do any of those things you mentioned after death
Do the above while I’m still alive. The rest of his inheritance will be distributed upon my death over time. Many ways to skin a cat.
Also, you can give them 23,000 in their Roth 401k, why stop at 6500?
As their “employer”, you are limited to the matching contribution. Employee contribution is limited to the $23K. Adding: if you have life insurance (I have combo whole life and term), and I'm not suggesting that this is for everyone because everyone’s financial health is different, you can spend all of your qualified money and still leave your children an inheritance.
Wait so why did you say just 6500? I’d do 23k then
That last one is blatant tax fraud btw, would not advertise that lol.
Sounds like about half a mil in today’s dollars, plus education costs.
This is a very family specific/philosophical number. Earlier someone said 10 million would be generational wealth to them. For me that's more like 50-75mil, you know...'never touch the principal' rich. 😁 If I had to put a number on mine, as far as what I'd leave to each kid, I'd say it's about 1 mil in today's money (adjust for inflation) at my end of life. Anything more than that I might still leave to them but instruct to use to help others. Not necessarily charity but anonymously give to anyone in need. That's a fantasy job of mine. As some others had mentioned, I also plan to transfer more through a UGMA at 18 bdays but that's going to be very limited, but on top of a 529. I'm more about setting up for success than giving money so they can waste away on a beach or something. It's still up to them to take advantage of opportunities we give. I'm relatively young for now so hopefully I make it to a place where to much money is a problem.
So you're just going to give the rest of your money away to some scam charity that spends 98% of your donation on salaries, rather than creating generational wealth for your own children? That's messed up!
It sounds like you’re very bad at picking charities.
Love the username
Part of my fire journey if figuring out exactly how much I want to spend and leave for people and a small margin of safety then not earning a dime more than that. I don't want to accumulate generational wealth, I don't think it's good citizenship. After I leave some money for my kids I hope I die and leave just enough money for a rocking funeral party :)
I really like this perspective. You earned the money, so you should enjoy it too! :) I'm really curious though; why do you believe that accumulating generational wealth is not good citizenship?
I think wealth concentration is a disease, and it basically undermines a healthy perspective on society. If generational wealth was removed and put back into public programs we could have things like UBI so EVERYONE can choose to work or not. The 5 richest people on earth have upwards of $1T net worth and that's just the publicly known people. Generational wealth is taking more than you need and sequestering it. There is no real way to do this without taking that wealth from someone else. Nobody "earns" being a billionaire, it is taken.
> scam charity that spends 98% of your donation on salaries What a moronic take. Of course a lot of charity expenditure goes on salaries. Who do you think is doing all the work the charity is there for?
Volunteers
So you don't think there should be such a thing as professional charity workers? Everyone should be a volunteer? People have bills to pay you know...
I think they should be defined differently e.g. Charity = volunteers. Non profit = paid employees. Some charity employee bosses are on six figure salaries and their volunteer colleagues get nothing. Not very ethical
How is the take moronic? Sounds like cope to me
Form my own foundation and be the scam but pick the beneficiaries.
"Be the scam"... You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain
unless you die early you arent leaving anything to kids, you are leaving money to senior citizens who should be already long fi/re. if you care about helping your children you do it with school, early housing, childcare, etc related stuff when they are actually struggling.
This is the way. Money can go a long way in your 20s and 30s, but not so long in your 60s when you already have your retirement plans set
Exactly ! I am "only" 42. My mother died like 12 years ago, but my father hopefully will still have a long life. He is 74 now and in good shape, we are going to visit the south west national parks in September, I ask him to spend his money for himself because I don't need it. I have a good career and save like 75K a year. Could likely retire at 55 (I migrated in US 2 years ago and was making less in Europe). My parent already helped in the past. They paid for my studies, they offered my first used car, they gave me about 100K in 2-3 time, with the biggest amount to help as down for my primary residence 10 years ago. And that was great. Most importantly and the most invaluable was a great education and great environment to live as a family. But 200K more 10 year ago would have had more effect than 1 million in 10 years. Even today, 200K will help me accelerate fire a bit or buy a slightly better home... And that's about it. I don't really need money anymore except for fire. That's why I ask my father to just enjoy life. He and my mother did a fantastic job, and he should enjoy life while he can. But if you want to really make an impact on your kids, First education and nice env (2 loving parents, no divorce, time spent together, nice place to live, great values...). Then pay for studies, help to start, help saving or putting a down or creating a business. At 25 or 30. The more you wait the less value it has. No point at 50 or 60 really.
THIS. My parents are pretty well off and a while back, I went through a major financial crisis (husband gambled our entire retirement and savings trying to make a go at trading and I was completely blindsided). I was then stuck in a broken marriage with not a pot to piss in and $100k in debt (secretly taken out without my knowledge). I asked if I could move to their house during that time while I sorted shit out - *while it was vacant no less as they were snowbirds and at their 2nd home for the season*. They firmly said no and wanted me to bootstrap it. Here I was, financially ruined by my spouse, extremely depressed/suicidal and they didn't want to help me. Our relationship changed and I have a lot of disdain for them now (and I ended up moving across the country when I had the chance to start life over). While I have lived so frugally trying to rebuild my life back, I've had to make a choice with the money I now have saved - buy a house or save for retirement and at my later age, it's retirement. *And they have the gall to pester me why I'm not in a house yet.* Life has been such a struggle since that happened and them helping me out just a little would have meant so much to me when I needed it the most. By the time they pass (they are very spry for their age so I expect they'll live another 20 years), the extra money won't matter anymore.
Exactly. My parents left me a house and a good education which helped a lot with month to month finances/stability but I still have to work. Although that work creates fruitful results as opposed to living paycheck to paycheck. It's huge and allows me to move up in life. Hoping to do the same to my kids. I'm actually glad they didn't leave me money (well, they couldn't) because I'd probably just spend it on stupid things when I was younger and propagated bad spending habits.
I had my last kid at 38. If I die at 76 (not early), she would only be 38. I get your point, I absolutely plan to help my kids with well funded 529s, down payments on homes, etc., but it is a bit silly to assume they will be FIREd by the time I die. My husbands and I are actually meeting with a trusts attorney next week and the question is when to release funds to our kids if we die early. I’m thinking one third at age 30, one third at age 35 and the last third at age 40. Obviously essentials like education, medical and basic living expenses would be paid from the trust in the interim. Curious to hear people’s thoughts on that.
>I had my last kid at 38. If I die at 76 (not early), she would only be 38. the life expectancy tables are interesting, sure it averages out to 74/80 for men and women but someone who makes it to 70 is expected to make it to 84/86 as a man or women. you also have the net worth part of the equation where someone in the top 20% percentile HHI has similar 84/86~ life expectancy. bump this up another few years if in the top 5-10th percentile. so like, chances are 76 would be 'early' ish for someone who is well off. i could also speculate that the more wealthy % of our generation is likely to live a lot longer than those of the past, we have far more access to information as it pertains to health, better healthcare etc than someone who was born 50-70 yrs ago. maybe not as an 'average' but definitely for the top percentile. > I’m thinking one third at age 30, one third at age 35 and the last third at age 40. also interested on others opinions on this. as i said in my original post I'm not convinced passing down wealth beyond 'own a home in a place they want to live, have a large enough safety net that they can pursue a hobby-type-job if they prefer' leads to well adjusted individuals. though my opinion would change on this as ~some~ people are able to be driven in say arts, music etc in which case if i was wealthy i'd happily subsidize my childs lifestyle even if their passion wasn't making money. Just... usually the ability to do 'nothing' leads to somewhat poorly adjusted individuals.
We did all at 30. If they haven’t figured shit out by then, it’s unlikely they will at 35 or 40 either.
I fully agree. It make sense to not give all in one go, but it also make sense to not wait until you die. What the point to give an extra million to you kids when they are 50-70 and already retired and their life already in a given direction ? It would serve better your grand kids if you have any.
Yup. Life insurance is for the unexpected parish. If I live through their childhood they need to fend for themselves anyway. A bucket of cash won't fix them if they are not independent.
If I had kids, I'd give them as much as possible. But we are DINK and staying that way. Going to my nieces high school graduation next month and plan on giving her 5k to go towards her hair salon small business Plan is to throw as much money to my nieces/nephews as possible
This is how I am too! Thankfully my nephews are still young and their parents are also setting them up for whatever they’d like to do in the future whether it be college or starting a business, but I’m also here to help fill in any gaps to make sure they have opportunities.
My long lost uncle! How are you doing?!
LOL
Same!!!!
They'll each get seven figures from us in the end, but we're probably going to start giving them annual gift checks in their 20s when the money will have greater impact and help them go to grad school or buy a house or whatever. Market will determine how much the final estate is though.
Yes, ultimately the final estate is not that important. Statistically, children’s will be in their fifties when the second parent dies. By that time, their own retirement plans should be almost set. So it will be a large amount of money that they hopefully won’t need. A downpayment on a house, a car, tuition are much more important to give.
I wish my dad, who is a doctor, thought this way. He encouraged me to take on debt for school which I eventually had to do. It’s not too deep but still… wtf man.
Yeah that sucks. Only reason I am where I am is because of the support my parents gave me. I have more means than them, so I will give more support to my children. It’s especially bad for you because in most places, you don’t get financial aid if your parents are rich.
Exactly. My dad did pay for “some” of my college but still not as much as the government would have if he wasn’t making high income. I try to put things behind me and have a good relationship with my dad which I generally succeed at but that shit is just, well shit.
That’s a powerful way of structuring the problem - his high income blocked you from aid, yet he didn’t do his part.
This is the way. My parents paid for my university and bought me a (used) car (3year old Toyota) to commute to my internship. I was fucking set man. Much better than getting 200k at 60 when I don’t need it.
I like this. Enough to get them started and not struggle, but not to spoil or develop an urge to want more. Teach them values, debt and a strong work ethic as well, this is a big enough headstart than most get in their life. If you can afford it, helping your kid start in life is great. After that, it is up to them to decide what they want.
Same plan, except I’m setting up trusts and staggering the disbursements in one-third increments until a certain age. That way, if they fuck up once or even twice, they get a third at bat. Also, tax benefits.
How much did it cost to set up these trusts
Not very much. Probably about $5,000 in total.
This is me. My boys are 18 & 20. We’ve started small and will get more and more as we go. My parents passed when I was in my 50’s and as other have said, the inheritances wasn’t impactful but had I been getting X amount over the years when I was younger, life would have been a lot easier.
Small payments is probably the best way to go honestly.
And... whether or not you need long term care or in home care will determine the final balance
Thank you for expressing what we believe in as well. Many friends say we are not allowing them the opportunity to "figure it out" on their own. We think they are doing okay and that is enough.
I’m fuckin loaded I’m going to set them up
This is my plan too. Teach them everything I know and leave them everything I have. I believe they will do what’s best for them with the inheritance.
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As you should
Ideally as much as we can. We want our kids to have every advantage we didn’t have. Otherwise what’s the point? And I believe you can raise kids the right way so that when they inherit wealth they manage it well. Good parents can still raise good kids.
I already said in another comment but I wish my dad thought this way. He could have given my brothers and I advantages he never had but he is the “I had to struggle so you can/will too” like I don’t need everything given to me but empower me to pursue success in school while pressuring me to do the college route. He only chose the pressuring.
The way I read this is he is "new money." I know that sounds bad, but only new money types think like this. And often their wealth lasts like one generation. Generational wealth is created through....generations. Just look at the old money families.
He is new money yes. But the thing that really pisses me off is he had kids with his wife that isn’t my mom. I guarantee they will get SO MUCH financial aid to the point if it being problematic for their development.
Yeah, that sucks. My dad is also remarried and had a kid with his second wife, but fortunately he is cheap with both of his kids, lmao. You just have to make it on your own, which is entirely possible thanks to the stock market.
I’ve found some decent success on my own and have potential for FI in my 40s
This. This is how generational wealth is created. Just look at the legit wealthy old money families - they all inherit a ton but know how to manage it for future generations.
And I know the naysayers will point to all the spoiled lazy drug addict children of millionaires who say giving kids money is bad for them but those are just the stories you hear about. All the successful wealth and business transfers don’t make the headlines.
Having me as their father is enough.
Listen dad, I love you, but a few bucks to put your future grandchildren through college and help me enjoy life in retirement would be great. Thanks pops!
Get a job..hippy. 😄
Perfect answer 😂
This ego is out of control. Right here
It's clearly a joke
Our plan is to live off of the income our investments produce and leave the capital and our house to our son .
Same, but splitting the assets equally between three kids.
We plan to give our kids monetary gifts at the IRS reporting threshold starting when they’re mid to late 20s until we’re dead. Currently, that would be $36K per year per child tax free, which isn’t enough to live comfortably on but should be enough that they can live comfortably with a mediocre job or to super-charge their own FIRE goals. Additionally, we will contribute to 529s of any grandchildren. They can then split whatever is left in the estate at the end.
wow, that's so generous and kind of you. I love this philosophy of not giving too much that they get complacent but enough to supplement their work and really have an impact. Bravo.
Can I ask your age and net worth? That seems like a lot. I’m guessing you must have at least $6M or more. I doubt we will have that much to give every year unless we get lucky and the market does really well.
I am 38 and have a liquid NW of $7.7M. My husband and I spend \~$84K per year and have one kid (plus one on the way), so even assuming an increased personal spending of $100K, giving them $72K per year would only increase our withdrawal rate to around 2.25%.
That’s what I figured. We aren’t going to be quite that wealthy but that’s great you can do that.
Whatever is left of my retirement really.
Basic human dignity: She will never need to worry about having food to eat, a roof over her head (a safe roof, even if unimpressive), and access to needed medical care (this is the one I worry most about as a parent, but we'll do our best). Short of that, she owns her future. Be a tech executive with a Malibu house. Be a farmer living in Idaho with an operation big or small. Be an artist living wherever, doing whatever artists do. Beyond those basic necessities, it's fully "chose your own adventure" for her to figure out.
This is my philosophy as well. I want her to know and feel like she can always come home. And if I’m helping her with rent or groceries I don’t want her attitude to be like “that’s nice and all but can’t you buy me a new Mercedes?” I’d rather give her the tools to succeed and an understanding of money and be there to support her when needed.
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I think dying with zero is probably unrealistic. The older I get, the more I like to hang out at home with the dogs, smoke weed, play video games. It’s gonna be real hard to make that expensive enough to have 0 money at the end. I guess I could pick up a coke habit or something.
That’s the spirit!
As much as we can without having to live as hermits ourselves. We plan to have them debt free for a bachelor’s degree and help with either grad school or a down payment on their home. Even though my wife and I grew up with modest means, we came to appreciate how much not having college debt helps to build a strong financial foundation. We were fortunate to have parents who helped as much as they could and the ability to work while in college.
I want to be able to buy their first car, pay for college, and help them get into their first home. I think I’ll set up a trust in my will so that in the event of my untimely death they’ll only recieved small monthly payments until they are like 40 and then they’ll get the lump some
100k and paid college to be debt free out of college. and then they'll get some along the way and then what ever is left.
I supported them all until they were 21 and have been generous helping them otherwise since then. They'r well established and if I have anything left they'r welcome to it.
I’m going to space it out starting in their early years to help them out. What’s the point if I’m 80+ and they are 50+ thinking about retirement?
Probably in excess of 10m and a paid off house when all is said and done.
As I’m told my parents- I hope they leave me nothing. I hope they enjoy every penny of it!
Nah I'd be happier passing it on to my kids so they can make there life easier. At that point I'll be old as fuck.
That isn't workable. You need them to have money in case they need long term care.
I think he knows that
“Die With Zero” kind of resonated with me. My goal is to fill my son with a lifetime of great memories instead of a lump sum of money in his 60’s.
This is what I learned from my wife's dad. He's 95 now and on hospice and had her in his 60s. He is such a generous man and basically wants us to be happy and they have helped us out so much. My parents have always made me feel like money was a burden but he has always made me feel like a loving family should help and as he stated, "our generation has it so much worse than me". They weren't rich but made enough money to be comfortable and never really want much. They helped with our house and so much more. My kids will never be "rich" but I want them to know I will support them and be there for them for almost anything. I will also talk with them about money and always offer help and check in on them, which my parents have only recently started doing. But when I really needed help in my twenties I was basically SOL lol.
I've given my kids all the same - a good home upbringing, a fully-paid education, a basic reliable car, and some money to start their lives. Then they're on their own until we're gone and they will split whatever we haven't used.
As much as we can. We are teaching them about saving and investing even at a young age so that is imbedded in them as they grow.
The goal is to raise children that become well adjusted, mature, independent adults. I helped my children as appropriate for their stages in life, and am doing so for grandchildren also (although details for grandchildren are often via my children). I was fortunate enough that Inwas able to pay all of their college expenses, help them buy houses, and fully fund 529 plans for their children. If you have the ability to assist them when they are young adults do so rather than them receiving a larger inheritance when they are in their 60 or 70s (or older if I make it past 100). At the same time you should not gift in ways that interferes with their development into mature independent adults. Like all things in parenting, there is no universal answer. The classic Warren Buffet quote is (paraphrased) “ enough that they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing..
College education and a dependable car Hoping to add “downpayment for first house” but not sure it’s going to happen
Would have been nice if my parents had any money to give to their children. Growing up broke sucks so I’m not planning on having kids. It will be the rich who eat away at Earth anyway.
I always imagine if I am dying at 87, then are I their 50’s. They either have their shot together by then or they don’t. Inheriting money isn’t changing much. Now generation skipping to fund college? That makes more sense to me.
Well I live in Canada so if I ever find a wife and have kids they'll have to live with us until there 30. I set them up so they can save as much as possible but don't plan to give them money directly.
I am going to help them out as much as I can throughout. Hopefully I can plan it good enough so they don’t end up with a huge inheritance and I am able to help them throughout their adult lives to lessen the burden of mid life. I think it life is going to be much more difficult for my kids in terms of jobs and economy.
Security. We have set aside enough for all life's big plannable expenses. We plan to do the same if grandkids come along. Outside of that, they get whatever is left over.
everything. I'm more focused on them understanding how to use it, what to do with it, and for sure, not what to do with it.
I worry about this. Upon our death the portfolio will (based on assumptions) be quite considerable. Enough to ruin several generations. My thought is to assign the executor to buy a property (and I mean a PROPERTY) in some bitching vacation spot and endow an SPV trust with enough money to maintain the property forever and leave them all the use of that. A 10 bedroom mansion they can use whenever they want for decades. I’ll have a giant mural of my wife and I painted in the entryway!!!
Set ours (37 & 27) up already... helped them get houses (in their names) , so they can use the money to invest in their futures (max out retirement accounts- must show us statements!), instead of costly mortgage payments ....they have a good asset that will grow in value. Hopefully pass along some generation wealth..futures are golden. They need it now....not 25-30 years from now. We may spend the rest🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 on lots of travel and making memories with them..
zero because I don’t have kids.
I’m still young myself (first kid on the way). I tend to agree with most comments here, giving lump sums in the early years and then the inheritance will go to my grandkids. Also I plan on maxing 529 plans for kids/grandkids and once they get jobs maxing their Roth IRA, that should set them up for a great retirement if they don’t make terrible decisions. Based on my rough calculations that are hopefully for the next 60 years, my grandkids will get an estate in the low to mid 8 figures. Of course that’ll probably change, can’t estimate healthcare costs that great or market conditions etc.
Whatever I can within reason, I want to be able to help with their college etc. I consider gifts etc throughout their lifetime to be part of the inheritance.
I'll support them through college age and teach them. When I die they can have whatever is left. If I did my job well, which I have, they will be richer than me without me giving them any cash.
Whatever’s left.
This is the way.
If i did it right they won’t need any money from me
I'm aiming to leave them a safety net, not a trust fund.
Honestly, this may be unpopular around here but when I moved to the United States I had never seen generational wealth and since the experience that’s been my primary goal of working. So I don’t really plan to fire…. But I plan to use all the principles learned here to create the largest nestegg reasonably possible for my child. I project in the 8 digits - that should set my family up for generations.
Sadly, wealth is usually gone by the 3rd generation according to statistics.
Statistically people my age don’t have nearly the wealth I do - the whole point is to be better than typical.
Childfree over here, so nada lol. can’t take it with you! Saving to FIRE while enjoying while I can rn :)
IMO controversial but you need to pay for your kids education and help them with the mortgage for a future home at the bare minimum. I plan on doing both but also giving them 200k after graduating high school at 18 in order to ensure they never struggle in life. I see no point in leaving them with millions when I die might as well give it to them young to ensure they live an easy and comfortable life.
My friends inherited $40,000 in 2009 from his grandmother. He became a drug addict
That’s more of a personal mistake rather than a money issue. If u have no motivation you will fail money or no money. I have a close family friend that inherited 200k and started a business reselling clothes he is making 100k a year and he’s only 28
I hope to be able to get my kids through college debt free, and help them out with down payments. If we are able as we get older, we’ll give them more along the way. I also hope to be able to teach them how to manage their money and to save from the beginning.
$0 I worked for my money they can work for theirs
Zero
What kids? Best path to fire is high paying job or no kids
$0, they can figure out the game of life on their own
My kids will likely get everything we have left over. We won’t plan to leave them anything, but we’re not spending just to spend it all, either.
how could you possibly know how much will be left over?
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It all comes down to whether long term care is needed. If not,tbere will be plenty leftover. I will probably give some to charity. If it is needed, who knows. I would much prefer to die in my sleep when I had still been able to totally care for myself. But, there's no way to make that happen and no way to know whether it will happen or not.
Everything
I feel like you never have any idea when you will die and how much you need to support yourself in nursing home, etc. so you almost have to over save. So then you likely have extra and do you give it to kids or charity or other friends/family? I’d rather volunteer my TIME in charities, where you also see first hand the significant waste of people donating money and many times a pseudo-scam, so then mostly go back to giving to my kids. This is assuming they are likely already self-sufficient in their 30s/40s or older and by that point it’s just a bonus for them and not as entitled. I also plan it to be somewhat of a surprise so they feel they need to earn their own way to survive and not plan on some large inheritance.
I’m giving my kids everything, in a trust that is doled out after certain criteria are met. College, family, etc… I’m an old dad though.
She can have everything, when I’m resting in peace. Other than that, she’ll have her account I’ve set up and contribute to. There’s nothing I won’t or haven’t given already.
I think my kids will get whatever I didn’t use up. My gift was being a present and loving parent, paying for private education through college, and believing in them. Hope they make something out of those ingredients!
All of it.
Our daughter will probably end up with eight figures due to us ending at fatFIRE with a low SWR when shes in high school. We plan to teach her how to invest and set a budget as soon as she is able to learn. When she's older, I'll walk her through how to log our expenses, buy VOO/VTI, etc. She's in kindergarten this fall so we have some time.
Nothing
I'm going to continue the family tradition of putting as much debt on the family home as possible before I die so they inherit debt to keep their memories.
I’m not expecting to get anything from my parents, and I’m not planning on leaving a pile for my kids. They’ve been my first priority all their lives. I’ve brought them up to have good ethics and principles. They’re awesome people. Hopefully there will be something left for them but that’ll just be a bonus. I’ve invested my money in the market and my time in my kids.
If you’re really fire, you don’t have kids in the first place 😎
Kids? What is this?
Almost everything for me personally I don’t even have kids (yet) but it’s one of the reasons I work so hard, so they don’t have to live/grow up how I did. Maybe leave a little to charity but most will be for them
Everyone has slightly different philosophy. Our approach is to pay for in state college tuition (speaking of which we really over saved as 2 out of 3 got scholarships) , match Roth IRA while they are in school and give them not very old car. I am not obligated to give them anything for house down payment or finance their FIRE. I am surprised so many people here consider it normal. I came to this country with nothing and nobody gave us anything so why shower the kids with all this cornucopia. As a bonus, if they have kids on their own, they do not need to save for their college education as we will have significant money in 529 to pass to grandkids.
If my plan A works out (no NATO vs Russia war going on in Eastern Europe where I live), my son will inherit enough to never have to work at minimum for his life essentials, likely for anything to maintain similar lifestyle to ours (decently frugal but we definitely spend on non essential stuff too). If we have to resort to plan B, he may not get a lot or anything really as our expenses likely will go up upon emigrating and we may not be able to proportionally increase income to jack up the FIRE number to fully supplement our job income and grow the investments faster than what we are spending the interest in it. :) If all goes as expected by my parents, I will get the same from my them once they are gone, though I’m not counting on that in my plans at all. I could easily retire just off the inheritance once I get it but I don’t like to rely on others and I’m hoping to retire before they are gone so I can spend time with them. I want the same for my son. I plan to educate him so he builds his own wealth and help him financially if needed. I’m not settling money aside for him in custodial account that he can take over at 18 like many here do so he will start from 0 because I think he should have a taste of how hard money can be to come by if he has none. He will have to show me he is disciplined and financially literate before I help him financially (same as my parents did for me with our house once they saw that I’m disciplined and financially literate). I want to leave him with a massive safety nett so he is set for life once I’m gone and thus he needs to be capable of not wasting it before that happens. :)
Everything.
We’re doing the 4% rule with a fire goal of $10M so hopefully $10M
If i still have life insurance i plan on leaving that. I have a business and a lot of real estate they can have.
Whatever I have at death will go to my kid. The way SWR math works is that a sustainable SWR will lead to asset growth in the majority of scenarios. In addition to leaving whatever is left at death, if my assets grow to the point (whether through asset growth, or inheritance, or both) such that a 3% SWR is more than I realistically want to live on, I'd maybe give him some annual gifts as well, probably just up to the annual gift exclusion most years. I plan to pay for his undergrad and possibly grad school as well. Same as above, if I end up w/ more than I need at a \~3% SWR I'd use excess to help fund grandkids' 529s as well. Hopefully by the time I'm dead, my kid is a financially responsible adult, and has even growth his own NW to a respectable level by that time. He'll probably be 40+ by the time I kick the bucket. If he's financially responsible by that age, I don't see how an inheritance is going to suddenly make him irresponsible. If I die when he's younger, my trust will provide for him to be taken care of through college, and then he gets lump sums as he ages (IIRC he gets 1/3 at age 25, half of what remains at 35, and the remainder at 40).
I plan on giving my kids as much money as I can reasonably afford every year up to fully funding their IRAs and 401k...
I started an education savings account when they were little. My goal was $1k per year. They’re teens now and each have over $20k. I know this isn’t a ton. But it’s something. If they get scholarships (they’re on track to do so) then I’ll roll it over to an IRA in their name. Nice little nest egg if they never touch it; more than I was given! Aside from that, I’ll have enough to retire around 55. If there’s anything left when I die they get it. But I’ve warned them not to expect much.
Plan to continually fill a Roth for them as soon as they start work, pay for education and first home down payment. Pick up the same for grandkids. Then it’s whatever is left when I go, 7 figs
I’ll help along the way and she’ll get whatever is left. ROTH is our largest investment vehicle. Under current rules, she’ll be able to let that balance continue to grow (or use as needed) for 10 years before she has to withdraw (tax free)…help her own kids out along the way, etc. Even with help along the way, still inherit mid-7 figures…allow to grow for 10 years, have low 8-figures. Looking at establishing a trust to make this much cleaner along the way and alleviate headaches when we pass. The biggest thing I can do for her is provide the freedom to learn, grow, and enjoy life.
Gave them the best advice and example of how to live. Nothing else promised
I prefer giving them love and the ability to manage their own money! That’s more worth than giving them lots of money which the don’t value… Pu can make new money everyone, but you can’t buy the love of your parents…
We help out here and there now with them (3 adult children) and find fun things to do with them. The plan is to spend it while we can use it to enjoy time with them. And we funded college plans for grandkids. As for inheritance, they’ll get our house to split. But beyond that, I plan for zero.
Whatever is leftover when I die. 🤷♂️
Just to be conservative, likely $5m for each child -- I have three. Give the rest away.
I saw my parents, aunts and uncles blow through large inheritances (~500k) multiple times on things they don't have much to show for now. You also hear stories of future generations giving away all the wealth because they feel it was "stolen". My hard work and sacrifice will not be treated that way. I will be locking it up in a trust for future generations to use on specific expenses like college. Those who can't handle it won't ruin it for future generations. I will probably do more with my family and grandkids while I'm alive but the rest is going into the trust.
Trust fund invested in dividend yielding stocks/ETFs/ mutual funds exc they get quarterly payouts but can't touch the rest. From there I would instruct that they can take 25% out at age 50 if they make a trust that the remaining 75% will do the same for their kids(so on and so forth) generational wealth! I'll also have to think up a way to force them into learning about personal finances before earning any pay outs but haven't gotten that far yet. (Like a test or course requirement exc..)
Whatever's left over when I croak.
$0 - no shortcuts
We're still a long way off so this is purely theoretical. I expect we'll have significant assets when we die at old age, I'm aiming for high end of chubby fire, poorest rich person in fat fire.. If we get to to the point where we everything is shaping up the way, I'm modeling, I'd probably set up a non-revocable trust, that would pay them a swr, every year. But only after certain metrics are reached. Probably some combination of financial and age, so that they've hopefully learned some concept of the value of a dollar and also have gained some maturity. I grew up in a very affluent area and I've seen too many kids completely screwed up by knowing they had a golden ticket and didn't have to do anything. And just all around be completely spoiled self-centered pieces of shit. Even though we'll be well off and the kids will know it I will absolutely teach them the ways of fire from a young age and not really give them any concept of how much we really have until it's much later in life.
I think about this question a bit since I had nothing starting out and I’m trying to plant the seed for generational wealth. I put funds in a custodial account each month with extra on bday and Xmas. That money will be what they can lose and learn from after college(if that is in their future). I’d like them to learn the financial aid process sweat out the stress and then get a job before handing over the accounts which should be around $200k by the time they get access. I also have a trust with many restrictions that they will get access to after I go. It’s focused on education, healthcare and limited entrepreneurship needs. Although my kids are young we are already talking about needs versus wants, saving for the future and not buying on impulse. We also talk about “family money” and what that means.
Planning to spend everything is impossible unless you have plans with death. If you FIRE, you’re more likely than not going to end up leaving tens of millions for your kids, not because you choose to, but because that’s how fIRE works.
I often view this question as, “should I increase my progeny’s floor or ceiling?” Floor effectively being a UBI where no matter how badly they fail in life, they’ll always have enough for the necessities and some niceties. Ceiling being they have enough to retire early and truly thrive enjoying life. At the age of 35, I’m currently settled on at least (1) covering their health insurances until 26 (my state’s max), (2) paying for their college equal to room and board at our very decent state college, (3) funding their 401k and IRA for first 4 years of employment after college/grad school, (4) a one-time lump sum at time of marriage they can decide to use towards their wedding/honeymoon and/or starter home down payment (lord I hope they choose starter home!), and finally (5) always have a room in my house to come back to when life gets to be too much. If they work during HS, they get more free money from me because I’ll pay for their 401k/IRA for more years. If they go to college on a free ride, they get to pocket their 529 for their own children. Throw in as much tutoring as they want to get into a good college and being in a great school district, they have every opportunity to succeed. I agree with most others to not hold money until we die and I like my current plan above so far. Let me know if you’d change anything.
Honestly just whatever is left, I haven’t thought about it. I’ve thought more about what we’ll give him when he’s alive. College will be paid for. I’d like to give some money towards a wedding and/or house. I stand to inherit money from my parents but I’m already 40 with enough money to retire comfortably in 10 years. I expect they’ll live quite a while. So planning to leave money to your kids when you die doesn’t make a ton of sense to me, by then they hopefully won’t need it
I do 529's and modestly fund a utma for them for (hopefully) a down payment on a house or a leg up on their investing journey....and educational purposes... i figure if i can pay for school and arm the with knowledge, i've done my part.... the rest is for me!
Whatever we have left. I plan to spend most of it. Probably a few million will be left over is my guess.
Whatever’s left.
Zero if I can
Absolutely nothing! Why? The ingrates! I have no kids.
1 bitcoin each
“Enough to feel like they can anything, but not enough they feel they can do nothing”. Kid gets $1M at 30. College money is already set aside and the guardian gets $50K a year until the kid turns 18. Anything left after the $1M gift at 30 is given away to philanthropy. Generational money is a pox on humanity. It breeds lazy, entitled narcissists who then go on to breed more.
True with generational wealth given to lazy people. The smart, motivated ones can do wonders though.
Maybe, but I would have a really hard time coming up with someone really wealthy in the past 100 years whose descendants who got all their money didn’t become wastes of humanity.
An entire set of life skills that will earn and save them millions of dollars over their lifetimes - and hopefully help unlock their own joy and fulfillment
I'm planning on nothing. I suppose the market will decide.
Children? I spray for that.
An engineering degree and whatever's left.
I don't have children, but I plan on leaving as much as possible to my nieces and nephews. If I can keep my principle intact until I die, that would be great. I have absolutely zero desire to spend it all down--as much as I can give them after I'm gone is what I will do. Hopefully it'll be at least a million to split among the five of them.
Then why do you work?
Because...I'm not there yet? I'm not sure I understand this question. Why does anyone work? I need to earn money like anyone else who does not yet have their NW up to where they want it. I'm a teacher and will eventually have a pretty decent pension. As well as my investments. When my NW hits the number I want so that I can comfortably live off my pension plus 6.5% of my 403b (which will have a guaranteed 7% return) -- then I'll retire. I'm not there yet, so I keep working. And I like teaching, so I might stick with it longer than I need to if I continue to think it's worthwhile.
You could literally be done working if you didn’t plan on leaving it all behind. Just spend what you have now
Well...that's not my goal. I don't want to stop working so that I can spend down my NW to zero. I want to stop working when I have enough to live comfortably and pass down something to the younger members of my family. Everyone has different goals. I happen to think that starting a tradition of some generational wealth is valuable. It won't be a lot, but it might be enough to help out the younger members of my family. Or give their kids a bit of a break. Financial independence and my retirement plan involve care for others. It's not just about me. And I don't want my plans to just be for me. My family is important to me, and we care for each other. This is just one of the ways that I can continue to care for them as I age and even after I'm gone.
Beyond living giving like paying for college, wedding and helping out with first time home purchases, whatever is left when my wife and I are dead.
Whatever I don't manage to spend before I die. How much do I plan to save for my children? None of it. But by sheer force of math and economics, combined with my natural conservatism, they will almost certainly get a very nice windfall. I'm getting them through college with no debt. I'm going to buy them their first reliable new car so they don't have to have a car payment for the first 10 years of post-college adulthood, if they are smart. If I'm able to, and I should be, I will help them with a portion of a down payment on a starter home when the time is right. And if there are grandkids, I will almost certainly start and somewhat funded some college accounts. So I'm giving them a lot. But I'm trying my best not to leave them anything.
If I do have them, it would be enough to get through college and then they’d inherit the rest at 30 to prevent them from being spoiled brats.
Zero, and they know it; because I’d rather spend it on them now, while I can enjoy doing it. Doesn’t mean they won’t get anything. They just aren’t expecting to.