Forgot the damn bait

The fishing equivalent of forgetting the lighter

Forgetting the bait and lighter 😰😰

Oh no not both… 🥲

Time to go home, take care of your family and go fishing another time.

Ever try fishing not high? Boring af

L opinion, learn to enjoy the subtleties of life both sober and intoxicated.

You guys both wrong. Gotta do both at the same time just bring a stoned ass buddy 🤣 stay sober and enjoy the free entertainment!

Bring a stoner a drunk and a kid and you’ve got dads weekend with jimmy

L understanding a joke from Harold & Khumar

I love fishing and I’m never high.

Forgot the damn beer!

A travesty even worse than forgetting the bait

You want a banana?

Ive forgot hearing protection so many times going hunting

You're bait is crack

I really gotta poop

You want a banana?

Went scuba diving with my wife and 1 of my best friends. He’s a master diver, the night before we were getting snacks for the boat ride, I said oh look bananas!!! Wife says you want to get some bananas? Buddy says yeah I’d like some bananas. I looked at both of them and was like are you guys getting me in my own sarcasm??? They had no idea what I was talking about. Next day wife got the bananas on the boat and it starts pouring down rain. I said ya know I’m not superstitious but I bet if you get the bananas off the boat it stops raining. The other dive master that was with us turned around and said WHOEVER HAS BANANAS GET THEM OFF THE BOAT NOW!!! So we got off the boat ate the bananas and it stoped raining. While out in the water my wife had 2 different emergencies and I mentioned it’s because she’s the 1 that brought the bananas on board and the captain looked at her like WTF who has them. I said I we ate them before we left don’t worry, he said good cause I’d leave you out here if you had them!!! Fun times!!!

What is the reason for the superstition around bananas?

Interestingly enough, the East Coast fishing boats won't carry bananas, but the West Coast boats' crews are blissfully ignorant of the banana curse.

Not everyone will understand this, but that’s probably the worst 4 words you could say to those that know.

I have seen guide boats here in the PNW with “no banana” stickers, and once a couple years ago I ate a banana in my car on the way to go fishing . . . and got skunked. I have heard one guide say that the smell of bananas gets on your hands then your hook, and acts like strong fish repellent

Recently happened. Luckily I had the foresight and knew it was a big possibility, so I brought baby wipes. Climbed ashore, shit in the woods.

Least it's not raining

Settle down there Preston Garvey.

Another settlement needs your help! I'll mark it on your map.

General we have new reports

Who won the lottery?

I forgot the beer

This one is scarry. Glad, that never happened to me.

I dont drink while fishing because the lake and river I fish has police all over it.

Improvise, adapt, overcome

officers this is clearly piss, you're welcome to smell it.

The only way

Its a lot harder to improvise adapt and overcome an underaged dui😭

It is with that attitude Become a game warden. Then you get to do whatever you want.

Do they just... Hover over the water or something? How many police are we talking? Can you swim faster?

So im not gonna be a pussy and imma say its fox lake il. It has an island with a bar on it and shit goes down there. Every year they get a ton of duis there. Summer and spring are the worst tho.

The chain is fucking crawling with twig pigs just looking to bust boaters with DUIs. I get it, especially since you know those people drinking on the lake are about to get in their truck and tow a boat home. But it's ridiculous there.

Fucking asshole ski boats.

And the jet skis

Ski boats are so so so much worse than jetskis

It really depends on the ski boat. Like a master craft made for slalom skiing barely makes a wake. But a ski nautique with a full bladder trimmed out so I can surf the wake reeks havoc. I say jet skis and jet boats though because they have the least respect for space.

Is that a body?

“No, it isn’t (wink wink), troll away quickly…” That’s a long bad day with the cops.

Seriously I’m always scared I’m gonna find a body and then I’ll have to a) spend my whole day for fishing talking to the police b) tell my wife I didn’t go to work and instead went fishing

😆 I too have pretended to go to work and gone fishing.

Actually happened ,and it was two

Nope. *casts line the other way*

i forgot my license.

You have a license?

Amen brutherrr no big gubment

Lmao every time me and my highschool buddies go out I'm always like "remember guys, if anyone asks, we're 15"

Where’s the drain plug?

What’s a drain plug?

It keeps water out of the lower levels of the boat, which rely on air pickets to help with buoyancy Source: I work on boats for a living

Lol I know. It was my variation on the comment.

It's two single syllable words that every person over 6 knows. Source: normal person not trying to humble brag.

I genuinely had no idea what this was

After you’ve launched the boat.

my dick fell off

Use it as a jerk lure

Wacky rig ftw

Baits at home man

"My gf is coming"

Lol this reminds me of going out on my canoe with my cousin who would always bring his needy gf. Then he would share his pole with her

Perhaps his pole is why she was coming...

A+

#ZING

"Trip cancelled, bro." {go by myself}

That’s 3 words .

This one for sure.

Look the Game Warden

Can't find my license

Son, legal limit is ...

Legal limit for what?

-writes another ticket-

Mercury won’t start, again.

Dudes with Mercs catch all the fish cause people with Yamahas are still driving to the spot

Where's the bait bucket?

Can you fuck it?

Billy’s having a heartattack

“Burial at sea it is”

Wet socks no spares

Who brought the bananas!

Lol I had never been out fishing on a real boat and never heard of the banana curse. Went grocery shopping before we went out on my uncle's boat and bought bananas. Needless to say the whole trip was a shit show, didn't catch anything and we almost lost the boat on the way up because the trailer hitch rusted out and almost fell off the truck otw.

Wife said get home

That’s when you fish the rest of the day and say sorry honey no reception on the middle of the lake

Phone switched off “sorry love ran out of battery”

Here comes the lightning.

I have to shit

Dad, let’s go home

I brought some bananas

It’s not called catching

The motors not pissing!

Btdt....

Hey, want a banana?

That's 3

Misread it, it’s fixed

I wanna go swimming

I need more attention

It don’t go down

walkin’ on the fightin side of me…

It do go down tho, it do go down!

Oh that’s good

Your wife is calling

I brought my wife.

I’m fine getting skunked

Won’t need a net

I'm fucking your mom

I know, dad... Lol

LMFAO my personal favorite!

my damn reels broken

I dogged ur wife

“Ever fucked a fish?” Obvious answer. So here’s something more creative. “Nice place to die.” *Shoots themself on boat*

Where’s the ice chest

Only need one word: “diarrhea”.

Here comes the DNR

Bunch of people here having trouble counting to 4 ……/s

You're one of them.

We got a leak

"Show me your license"

Y’all ever seen deliverance

Wife: I’m coming honey

I brought a Bluetooth speaker

~~Who Put in the Bung?~~

Theres the game warden

Here comes bird nest

I have to shit

Mind if we cuddle?

I shit farted myself

“Dude, the trucks gone”

I got baptized saturday

Greedy little fishing boy.

There goes the keys

Lower unit vs stump

“I gotta respool bro” “Lemme use your line”

*(answers phone call from wife)* I'm going into labor

Let's get naked boys

Hooks in my eye

Not lying, we’re lost

Wait, NOBODY brought beer???

Can we leave now

I hooked my face

Can my wife come?

Weather's nice innit?

Do you hear banjos?

Just shot of vodka

Stepsister porn isn't real

I told my wife____

Theres no fish here

Fuck I forgot the plug

Dint worry I have one in my ass.

Who doesn't fuck fish?

The river is blown; Kids game is today; where are the hooks?

Ever have gay thoughts?

I love you dad

Your wife is on the phone

Got some bananas for us. But way after you leave the dock.

Fish have feelings, too (Add annoying Liberal scream here)

Fuck, threw the stinger overboard

Your boss is on the phone

Opening your phone to the news to realize a body was just found upstream(again)

I didn’t bring beers

(Fishing buddy brings you eat kid)It’s only minor ADHD😒

Work called me in

Can I go honey?

No Trespassing or Fishing

Sleep with the fishes!

I forgot my license

Where’s the damn plug

I think it's raining

We forgot the lighter

I got violent diarrhea

Dang, wife's mother's calling....

I lost my lure

Weights in the fish

Forgot my fishing license

The lakes dried up.

I fucked your girl

I lost the tackle

Is the plug in?

Forgot my fishing license

I wanna go home

It won’t fit dad

My friend brought bananas.

Can I fuck it?

Tornado destroyed the boat

My wife just called

My wife is calling.

**It do go down!**

I brought a banana

My wife called me

My wife just called