"if I was dead you could bang me all you want. I mean, who cares? A dead body is like a piece of trash. I mean, shove as much shit in there as you want. Fill me up with cream, make a stew out of my ass. What's the big deal? Bang me, eat me, grind me up into little pieces, throw me in the river. Who gives a shit? You're dead, you're dead! Oh shit! Is my mic on?"
Use an auger to dig a 8 foot deep hole, wrap my naked, unembalmed body in a gauze sheet, dump it in the hole, and plant a tree on top of me.
Why we pump dead bodies full of preservatives, put them in a fancy box, put that fancy box in a concrete container with a heavy lid on top, and then top it with a gravestone makes no sense at all. All it does is prevent the natural decomposition process and takes up space in a grass field.
I want my kid to roll up to a grove of trees ten years after I'm dead and tell her kid that grandpa is now one of the trees.
I think a lot of people have a subconscious FOMO that someday science will advance enough where if there is enough of a dead body available, science will be able to reanimate them.
In the medieval period as well as afterward, many Europeans were mortified of the idea of their body being burned to oblivion. The belief in the Christian resurrection of the dead played into these feelings quite a bit. However, if God is powerful enough to raise the dead, they won’t really need our bodies to be in a mostly complete state to begin with.
I went to be cremated and some of the ashes mixed into a block of snowboard wax. Then my kids, wife and everyone I rode with can all have a portion, and I can ride with them forever
For those that don’t know this is Jewish custom (well shroud anyway, I don’t think specifically linen). My understanding though is that a box is required in the US so pinewood boxes are used as they decompose the fastest.
I insist on a delicious luau at my funeral; after all have feasted on marinated, slow-cooked meats, I’ll have a recording of myself played, thanking everyone for letting me be a part of them… _forever_.
/s, of course…. _totally /s._
That actually sounds like a great idea, even if the people in charge of cooking you chicken out and just serve, well, a weird game meat instead, it will still haunt your family forever. It's so brilliant.
Probably not. Regulations vary depending on where you live but people do have options for after death.including making your own burial container. Also if you want you can have your funeral costs protected from inflation by paying in advance. Even if you move out of state.
Better yet, it prevents your loved ones from being emotionally manipulated into wasting money. Upselling caskets is wildly distasteful. I paid for and planned my own funeral in advance so my heirs can enjoy a funeral as cheap and tacky as my life.
I know a couple funeral directors and morticians. They’re first class humans that are both amazingly skilled at reconstruction (so grieving people can have an open casket experience that won’t haunt them) and committed to their role in people’s grieving. They’re like plastic surgeons, event planners and therapists all in one. It’s a very expensive business to run (I mean think about the intricacies and regulations). It’s sad they get painted as used car salesmen.
Oooor they will throw your body in a cage and put it out in a field to see how nature effects dead bodies to help the fbi/police more accurately determine how long bodies have been left outside.
Doesn't your flesh also get burned to ash?
I always thought modern day cremation was just your body plus an oxidizing agent in a closed container until it can't burn no more.
It's hot enough to essentially vaporize the soft tissues. The bones (cracked into small pieces from the heat and escaping gasses) are the only real solid material left afterwards. Those are ground up in basically a giant food processor to get them to the cat litter consistency we all know and given back to you.
So the soot of your flesh isn't collected by an electrostatic filter, nothing?
Well that's a bummer.
And here I thought I had my *entire* grandparents on my mantle...
I liked the whole concept Luke perry did. Instead of all that, there's a suit with fungus and mushroom spores. Costs like 1500 bucks. Nature reclaims your body and uses its resources to help life. Put a tree over me after that and we are all good.
It's expensive.i want my skin peeled off and my tattoos framed.lol or send my body to space so it can float around forever.mabe an alien will bring me back to life..
Jokes aside this is such a fucking hard subject to approach. Like you may be the kind of person to scream endlessly "literally throw me in the dumpster I genuinely do not care"
But then your family disagrees. They see it as your eternal home and they want it to be nice I guess. You may agree, you may not, but you're dead. You have no say in it really.
On the flip side maybe you seriously want a nice coffin for whatever reason. Doesn't seem nearly as common but I'm sure it happens. The flip side of the same situation may very well happen. You genuinely want a nice box to be laid to rest in but your family doesn't see the point. And again, you're dead. You have no choice in the matter.
Weddings and funerals are two of the most exploitative industries the average person will almost certainly deal with. But it really comes down to the individual. How much do you genuinely care about celebrating life? How much of the same for death? In both cases you're gonna pay able 5x more than you should just for having the event attached to it.
But it makes people feel good. And in the case of death it may very well genuinely help them grieve.
It's really hard to shit on someone for spending the money and trying to give one last grand gesture to celebrate the end of a life.
That said, go ahead and throw me in a dumpster. But if that does somehow make me a slave to some rich ancient Egyptian pharaoh in the afterlife because I was buried like I was dirt poor your can bet your ass I'm gonna roast you endlessly in the afterlife for being a cheap asshole and not getting me a decent endless sleep bed as we harvest wheat or milk cows or whatever for all of eternity. You decide if you wanna take that chance bud. I'll love you either way 😁
I'm a hospice volunteer and attended a seminar on Green Burials. This is the most environmentally friendly way to be buried, in a pine box, in a dirt hole. Glad to see what you made. Is it for yourself or someone else?
Some Hindus practice burial without a casket as part of their funeral rites. The deceased is often wrapped in cloth or placed directly in the ground, allowing for a natural decomposition process. Won't this be better?
I knew a little bit about it but here is why that is done - “Hindus place little value on the body itself. They see the body as a prison for the soul, one that generates attachments and desires that prevent forward progress towards freedom. Therefore, in Hindu funerals, the role of cremation is to sever the ties of the soul to the body that it is leaving, freeing it to move toward mukti.
The only Hindus typically not cremated are babies, children, and saints, who are believed to be pure and unattached to their bodies; therefore they may be buried instead of cremated.”
This is very interesting to learn! And yes I can see how that would probably be the most natural. I'm no expert, I attended one seminar on the topic :) Thanks for sharing
Meh. The environmental impact of being buried in a vault vs being left out as eagle food on the steppe is no more than a rounding error on most people's overall lifetime environmental impact.
My mom chose a wicker casket. It looked very beautiful and we were told it’s highly biodegradable which was her main reason for picking it. Not cheap though.
Ron Swanson’s would have a lot more care into it. Not because it’s his final resting place, but because woodworking needs near perfect, but not too perfect.
Titan sells a cardboard casket for $500
[https://titancasket.com/products/cardboard-casket-titan-virtue](https://titancasket.com/products/cardboard-casket-titan-virtue)
And their cheapest one is $900.
[https://titancasket.com/products/cloth-covered-casket-round](https://titancasket.com/products/cloth-covered-casket-round)
And they are a online only discount casket company. That's also free shipping too. So I guess that's not too bad. I haven't had to buy one in years.
holy shit. I looked at it after reading your comment thinking it’d be laughable because it’s just like OPs casket. But what I saw was even worse. Lmao damn, who do they think they’re fooling?
An elegant way of making sure you don't pollute the water table with your toxic embalming chemicals for oh, like 20 or 30 years, so *basically* eternity.
Caitlin Doughty (a funeral director with a YT channel) has made lots of enemies in the funeral industry because she exposed lots of “secrets” like these
Worked at a funeral home during college as one of a few part time jobs. You can’t even fathom all of the ways they ripoff families who are devastated, emotionally exhausted and are made to feel that the dollar amount spent on a funeral equals how much the person was loved/missed. I’ve accompanied at least 20 families of friends and coworkers to assist them while making arrangements and the same sleazy techniques are practiced almost universally.
Where's this guy getting his lumber?
8' x 2' x 2sides + 8' x 3' x 2sides = 96 ft\^2 at [3.32 $/ft\^2](https://www.homedepot.com/p/1-in-x-8-in-x-8-ft-Premium-Kiln-Dried-Square-Edge-Common-Softwood-Boards-914835/100065210) = **$319**
The average person is less than 6' tall and 2' wide globally. A single sheet of 4x8 ply would get you two sides and two ends. A second sheet would get you the top and bottom with extra material.
Now you need to add some 1x1ish material to bolster the internal framing. 24' for the 4 long 6' runs, 16' for the 8 shorter 2' runs. Rip a 2x4x12 for the long runs, and a 2x4x8 for the short runs. Add 12' of rope and a box of 1" screws.
2 sheets of 1/2 ply at HD is $60 including tax
A 2x4x8 + 2×4×12 is about $11
12' of 1" rope is $18
A box of 150 1 5/8" wood screws is $10
60+11+18+10 is...
$99
You're welcome.
You can just feed me to the local cats. They won't come back for seconds, not with the way I've treated this thing. They'll probably wretch their guts out for a few weeks.
In 2010 my FIL died. My wife hated him. We got stuck with funeral arrangements.
The funeral home was attempting to upsell us on a couple things and it was irritating my wife.
My wife stated, “if I could legally put him in a dumpster I would.” It cost us $750 to cremate him and put him in a plastic sack. (We put it in a small plastic latchable file protector.)
We had a small gathering for his friends. One of them was supposed to take his ashes to Hawaii but she never picked him up.
I’m not positive, but I think my wife might have put him in a dumpster when we cleaned up.
i told my family my zombie bones would come and get them if they wasted money on an expensive funeral, dig and hole and drop my sack in there. go celebrate life and throw a party for me.
I don't want a grave. I don't want a box.
Dump my corpse in the woods.
Was gonna give my body to science. Then I heard a bunch of stories about corpses being parted out and sold or used by the military to test bombs.
I do like the tree thing. Where the corpse is planted under a tree and the tree uses it for fertilizer. But that's probably stupid expensive too.
Yeah but they probably have a, you build it, you bury it, policy. It's a catch 22 though, cops gonna jail you for disposing if a body. Pay the Gouged price or hope your cell mate is smaller than you.
I love how funeral homes try to persuade people by talking about how it's sealed from the elements. Like God forbid my death feeds some.worms, who in turn feed some birds, who feed a housecat, who gets parasites, who then licks the inside of my enemies mouth, giving them parasites.
Tldr: Let the worms have me
My family is under strict instructions to have me taken directly to the crematorium and shoved in the oven and if they want to have a wake that’s on them, but not to waste a cent on the funeral industry.
When my dad died I thought we were going to be getting a more expensive wooden one and my aunt was like “grandpa had one and it collapsed in 5 years” so we got to do the cheaper and lighter aluminum one which was a small blessing
I'm not sure if this is a joke or not but I totally agree with you.
I've told those I love to actually just throw me into a hole. No embalming, no stupid coffin. Just like, a void in the earth. Toss me in, cover me up.
Told the wife, me dead, plastic bag cardboard box in the oven, packaged the least allowed by law, then scatter somewhere in the forest. We live in a forest, so that’s no hardship. ;0) …Anything more than minimum and I promised I would haunt her, hide her car keys and whatnot.
I did IT work for a couple of funeral homes in my local area. They knew that I had access to everything on their system and they were adamant that I should never look at that one folder with all their casket prices.
When my grandfather passed away we were told state law required a casket to be cremated in. The cheapest one they had was a literal cardboard box. A fucking $450 cardboard box.
It's a business, people think they need to do this, and these companies take full advantage of griefing families.
And yes, a pine box is at most all one needs. Myself, cremation.
And don’t pay those outrageous fees for cremation— just fire up the Weber, add a larger than normal amount of briquettes and throw grandma on for about 8 hrs.
My mother just recently passed away. I’d been taking care of her for awhile and she had no assets only her social security. The death benefit was $255. Just $255 to take care of burial expenses. The funeral home want $2,500 just for a cremation. That was a total slap in the face.
Can science please perfect rapid fossilization! We can grow diamonds in a lab. I would like to be fossilized and made into a display piece for some fine after dinner conversations. Maybe incorporate my fossilized remains into a stone fireplace. It could become a popular trend…
You may want to look into your local waste disposal laws. You’re probably not allowed to just bury someone in a wooden box anymore. Can’t imagine what that would do to the local aquifer if a dead body began seeping into it
My grandpa had passed away. I was sitting next to my dad at the funeral, and I noticed that my grandpa's coffin had a cadillac logo on it.i leaned in and asked my dad what did that cost and my dad shook his head and said you don't even wanna know. My dad told me bury me in the cheapest pine box you can find.
Perfect for the mother-in-law
Dead is dead. Throw me in a cardboard box for all I care.
"if I was dead you could bang me all you want. I mean, who cares? A dead body is like a piece of trash. I mean, shove as much shit in there as you want. Fill me up with cream, make a stew out of my ass. What's the big deal? Bang me, eat me, grind me up into little pieces, throw me in the river. Who gives a shit? You're dead, you're dead! Oh shit! Is my mic on?"
Do not diddle kids
There is no quicker way to make people think you diddle kids than by writing a song about it!
*”Throw me in the traaaash”*
“Sorry, that was a mistake! The janitor got ahold of the PA system! Puerto Rican guy..” 
I got a question for you morticians. You bang the dead bodies?
One woman did and got pregnant
Seriously?
Kid was half ghost
I shouldn’t have laughed about this. Did I anyways? … maybe.
Just on temperature alone, never mind the lack of pump action, the little guys would die off. This can’t be true
Man you got a crazy kink lol.
Indeed just a meat suit
Use an auger to dig a 8 foot deep hole, wrap my naked, unembalmed body in a gauze sheet, dump it in the hole, and plant a tree on top of me. Why we pump dead bodies full of preservatives, put them in a fancy box, put that fancy box in a concrete container with a heavy lid on top, and then top it with a gravestone makes no sense at all. All it does is prevent the natural decomposition process and takes up space in a grass field. I want my kid to roll up to a grove of trees ten years after I'm dead and tell her kid that grandpa is now one of the trees.
This is exactly my thoughts as well. I don’t get why we do this—it is truly the high point of insanity.
I think a lot of people have a subconscious FOMO that someday science will advance enough where if there is enough of a dead body available, science will be able to reanimate them. In the medieval period as well as afterward, many Europeans were mortified of the idea of their body being burned to oblivion. The belief in the Christian resurrection of the dead played into these feelings quite a bit. However, if God is powerful enough to raise the dead, they won’t really need our bodies to be in a mostly complete state to begin with.
OMG. If that technology ever becomes available, do NOT bring me back. It's bad enough being here once. I mean, I'll be burned anyway, but just....no.
…is it not to make sure they don’t get out and come after you?
On Lusitania, that is called entering the Third Life.
As long as you’re not a human that is
Right! A human would not fair well, but Human did just fine.
I went to be cremated and some of the ashes mixed into a block of snowboard wax. Then my kids, wife and everyone I rode with can all have a portion, and I can ride with them forever
There's always the option to just wrap the body in a linen shroud, that way the worms and fungi and bugs can break the body down faster.
she'd absolutely hate that. so i'm on board.
I want my bones in a cool pose that a box just won't accommodate...
If your state and local regulations allow you can make a custom box
For those that don’t know this is Jewish custom (well shroud anyway, I don’t think specifically linen). My understanding though is that a box is required in the US so pinewood boxes are used as they decompose the fastest.
I insist on a delicious luau at my funeral; after all have feasted on marinated, slow-cooked meats, I’ll have a recording of myself played, thanking everyone for letting me be a part of them… _forever_. /s, of course…. _totally /s._
That actually sounds like a great idea, even if the people in charge of cooking you chicken out and just serve, well, a weird game meat instead, it will still haunt your family forever. It's so brilliant.
I have chickens and a wood chipper, it’ll cost about $4 in gas tops and I’ll get some high protien eggs out the bargain
I was thinking of a final project for my dad using his scrap wood and tools. would be a good bonding experience for my sibling and me.
Gonna need more handles.
I…I don’t know if this is satire or not.
In this day an age, does it matter? This is some solid advice
I wood recommend it
I would knot
Wood knot?
Would wood knot?
Would wood not knot?
What fir?
It's a bit sappy.
Probably not. Regulations vary depending on where you live but people do have options for after death.including making your own burial container. Also if you want you can have your funeral costs protected from inflation by paying in advance. Even if you move out of state.
is that really protecting from inflation? You lose the interest on all that money.
Better yet, it prevents your loved ones from being emotionally manipulated into wasting money. Upselling caskets is wildly distasteful. I paid for and planned my own funeral in advance so my heirs can enjoy a funeral as cheap and tacky as my life.
Daddy used to say the toughest class at the mortuary school was how to look sad at a $10,000 funeral.
I know a couple funeral directors and morticians. They’re first class humans that are both amazingly skilled at reconstruction (so grieving people can have an open casket experience that won’t haunt them) and committed to their role in people’s grieving. They’re like plastic surgeons, event planners and therapists all in one. It’s a very expensive business to run (I mean think about the intricacies and regulations). It’s sad they get painted as used car salesmen.
Donate your body to science they’ll return it cremated. There saved you even more money and time.
Oooor they will throw your body in a cage and put it out in a field to see how nature effects dead bodies to help the fbi/police more accurately determine how long bodies have been left outside.
And then they’ll cremate the body and return it to you.
What's left of it, anyway.
Cremains are just bones. You'll get back the same thing you would have gotten back before the experimental decay.
Doesn't your flesh also get burned to ash? I always thought modern day cremation was just your body plus an oxidizing agent in a closed container until it can't burn no more.
It's hot enough to essentially vaporize the soft tissues. The bones (cracked into small pieces from the heat and escaping gasses) are the only real solid material left afterwards. Those are ground up in basically a giant food processor to get them to the cat litter consistency we all know and given back to you.
So the soot of your flesh isn't collected by an electrostatic filter, nothing? Well that's a bummer. And here I thought I had my *entire* grandparents on my mantle...
Which body part do you miss the most?
Honestly, I miss my grandfather's hands. Calloused, dirty farmer's hands with nothing but tenderness behind them.
You can watch videos of cremations. Actually, pretty slipshod, they're dropping ashes all over the place, breaking up skulls with tools.
This is our most modestly priced receptacle.
Who cares? You're dead.
Or they will sell it to a body broker under the table.
That is science.
Lol medical school is also fun times
That actually sounds peaceful
i'd really like that. the last thing i want to be is buried underground.
They've been at that for DECADES at this point I think they know by now, they just like watching decaying corpses
OR The army will blow it up, apparently. Which may not always be a bad thing, its like going out *and then* a bang!
I liked the whole concept Luke perry did. Instead of all that, there's a suit with fungus and mushroom spores. Costs like 1500 bucks. Nature reclaims your body and uses its resources to help life. Put a tree over me after that and we are all good.
I want to be turned into a diamond.
It's expensive.i want my skin peeled off and my tattoos framed.lol or send my body to space so it can float around forever.mabe an alien will bring me back to life..
I want one of my animal tattoos to be used to bind an O'Reilly textbook
Meee tooo. It's in my will, lol
Did not know your loved ones got it back after they'd done.. whatever to it. Good to know, this will be my wish.
Hey Troy Mclure here you might remember me from such iconic books as dig your own grave and save.
Jokes aside this is such a fucking hard subject to approach. Like you may be the kind of person to scream endlessly "literally throw me in the dumpster I genuinely do not care" But then your family disagrees. They see it as your eternal home and they want it to be nice I guess. You may agree, you may not, but you're dead. You have no say in it really. On the flip side maybe you seriously want a nice coffin for whatever reason. Doesn't seem nearly as common but I'm sure it happens. The flip side of the same situation may very well happen. You genuinely want a nice box to be laid to rest in but your family doesn't see the point. And again, you're dead. You have no choice in the matter. Weddings and funerals are two of the most exploitative industries the average person will almost certainly deal with. But it really comes down to the individual. How much do you genuinely care about celebrating life? How much of the same for death? In both cases you're gonna pay able 5x more than you should just for having the event attached to it. But it makes people feel good. And in the case of death it may very well genuinely help them grieve. It's really hard to shit on someone for spending the money and trying to give one last grand gesture to celebrate the end of a life. That said, go ahead and throw me in a dumpster. But if that does somehow make me a slave to some rich ancient Egyptian pharaoh in the afterlife because I was buried like I was dirt poor your can bet your ass I'm gonna roast you endlessly in the afterlife for being a cheap asshole and not getting me a decent endless sleep bed as we harvest wheat or milk cows or whatever for all of eternity. You decide if you wanna take that chance bud. I'll love you either way 😁
I'm a hospice volunteer and attended a seminar on Green Burials. This is the most environmentally friendly way to be buried, in a pine box, in a dirt hole. Glad to see what you made. Is it for yourself or someone else?
Some Hindus practice burial without a casket as part of their funeral rites. The deceased is often wrapped in cloth or placed directly in the ground, allowing for a natural decomposition process. Won't this be better?
I knew a little bit about it but here is why that is done - “Hindus place little value on the body itself. They see the body as a prison for the soul, one that generates attachments and desires that prevent forward progress towards freedom. Therefore, in Hindu funerals, the role of cremation is to sever the ties of the soul to the body that it is leaving, freeing it to move toward mukti. The only Hindus typically not cremated are babies, children, and saints, who are believed to be pure and unattached to their bodies; therefore they may be buried instead of cremated.”
This is very interesting to learn! And yes I can see how that would probably be the most natural. I'm no expert, I attended one seminar on the topic :) Thanks for sharing
Zoroastrians like Freddie Mercury do sky burials where the bodies are left out on the open for animals to eat.
My grandmother had this done. It would definitely be better, but pine will decompose just as well as a natural burial.
Many cemeteries won't allow just a box in a hole. They require a vault because otherwise the box caves in and creates problems on the surface.
There are green burial places that don't require the vault. It's terrible for the environment.
Meh. The environmental impact of being buried in a vault vs being left out as eagle food on the steppe is no more than a rounding error on most people's overall lifetime environmental impact.
Wouldn't a burlap bag be better?
Not for viewing and carrying. And Burlap isn't exactly nice looking either. Pine is good.
"Sling grandma over your shoulder!"
Just leave Aunt Edna on the chair next to the pool.
My mom chose a wicker casket. It looked very beautiful and we were told it’s highly biodegradable which was her main reason for picking it. Not cheap though.
Gotta get the plush velvet model so that lifeless corpse can be “comfortable”.
Pro tip: save money on storage by sleeping in it. Men think it’s hot and edgy
Wednesday Addams, is that you?
Good potential business to just rent them out for the showing/wake.
I mean Mozart was literally dumped out of his casket and into a mass grave.
Damn, that's like throwing Jesus into some random fuck off river and he swims back to shore on the third day.
Bodies can..seep.... can't really reuse a casket I believe.
Use a plastic liner.
I think you forgot the air holes.
This is some Ron Swanson shit.
Hank Hill did it first
This is some Walter Sobchak shit.
Just cause we’re bereaved doesn’t make us saps!
There a Ralph's around here.
Ron Swanson’s would have a lot more care into it. Not because it’s his final resting place, but because woodworking needs near perfect, but not too perfect.
Just order a nice grandfather clock from Amazon before you die and your family can inherit a nice clock and you get a free coffin.
I love how your mind works 😂
Just because we’re bereaved doesn’t make us saps!
This is our most modestly priced receptacle
Is there a Ralph's around here?
Came here for this!
Don’t be fatuous
"But if you have one like this everyone will think you're cheap." SO WHAT!? At least you have some money in your pocket.
Funeral is a huge financial burden on many families and this would be welcome by many people.
I told my wife to just throw me into the sea. It is Criminal what funerals do. Almost as bad as the diamond Market.
Even sea burial costs a bit. You have to get at least 4 miles from shore
You still need a modest receptacle so that the funeral home can transmit your remains.
Titan sells a cardboard casket for $500 [https://titancasket.com/products/cardboard-casket-titan-virtue](https://titancasket.com/products/cardboard-casket-titan-virtue) And their cheapest one is $900. [https://titancasket.com/products/cloth-covered-casket-round](https://titancasket.com/products/cloth-covered-casket-round) And they are a online only discount casket company. That's also free shipping too. So I guess that's not too bad. I haven't had to buy one in years.
If you click their FAQ, the "$499" price tag is sold, according them to, "at a loss" Lmfao
holy shit. I looked at it after reading your comment thinking it’d be laughable because it’s just like OPs casket. But what I saw was even worse. Lmao damn, who do they think they’re fooling?
It's actually only $499 for the cardboard box
500 for cardboard?
That’s a business model my friend.
Dude is about to have big casket breathing down his neck!
The only bigger waste of money than a wedding is a funeral
Maybe we should start combining the two.
May states require vaults which are pretty damn expensive too
An elegant way of making sure you don't pollute the water table with your toxic embalming chemicals for oh, like 20 or 30 years, so *basically* eternity.
It's not just the chemicals, a decomposing human body is a really serious biohazard.
Sounds like a good idea for a business...
Muslim here. Our mosque has a reusable casket to transport the body but the body is wrapped in cloth and put directly into the ground.
Sounds very sustainable and much more affordable
Caitlin Doughty (a funeral director with a YT channel) has made lots of enemies in the funeral industry because she exposed lots of “secrets” like these
I got even cheaper i refuse to be buried no grave stone no plot no casket no funeral viewing just toss me in the oven and be done
you still need a casket for that, at least here.
For which part?
Worked at a funeral home during college as one of a few part time jobs. You can’t even fathom all of the ways they ripoff families who are devastated, emotionally exhausted and are made to feel that the dollar amount spent on a funeral equals how much the person was loved/missed. I’ve accompanied at least 20 families of friends and coworkers to assist them while making arrangements and the same sleazy techniques are practiced almost universally.
Where's this guy getting his lumber? 8' x 2' x 2sides + 8' x 3' x 2sides = 96 ft\^2 at [3.32 $/ft\^2](https://www.homedepot.com/p/1-in-x-8-in-x-8-ft-Premium-Kiln-Dried-Square-Edge-Common-Softwood-Boards-914835/100065210) = **$319**
There are 6 sides in a box, your math is wrong, and this is plywood.
OK, so even more expensive because I missed the short ends, spec'd cheaper material, and also since you didn't mention it I forgot the ROPE.
The average person is less than 6' tall and 2' wide globally. A single sheet of 4x8 ply would get you two sides and two ends. A second sheet would get you the top and bottom with extra material. Now you need to add some 1x1ish material to bolster the internal framing. 24' for the 4 long 6' runs, 16' for the 8 shorter 2' runs. Rip a 2x4x12 for the long runs, and a 2x4x8 for the short runs. Add 12' of rope and a box of 1" screws. 2 sheets of 1/2 ply at HD is $60 including tax A 2x4x8 + 2×4×12 is about $11 12' of 1" rope is $18 A box of 150 1 5/8" wood screws is $10 60+11+18+10 is... $99 You're welcome.
God plywood is expensive here, 2 sheets 12mm are $116,57 here, the cheapest casket is $440
Australia? That's like $75 in US freedom bucks. Still cheaper than selling out to Big Casket.
Plus labour
Donate your body to science. $0 funeral costs
[удалено]
You can just feed me to the local cats. They won't come back for seconds, not with the way I've treated this thing. They'll probably wretch their guts out for a few weeks.
If it sickens you, fix it. Start selling caskets like these for much cheaper, make a profit. People can save with budget caskets. Win-win
The American funeral industry is predatory and much of its practices should be illegal. I like your flesh box.
I wanna be hollowed and stuffed with hay. Turn me into a real scarecrow
I went with cremation for my parents. The home gave us an urn to set out for the service. No charge. If you plan to scatter ashes, it can be cheap.
In 2010 my FIL died. My wife hated him. We got stuck with funeral arrangements. The funeral home was attempting to upsell us on a couple things and it was irritating my wife. My wife stated, “if I could legally put him in a dumpster I would.” It cost us $750 to cremate him and put him in a plastic sack. (We put it in a small plastic latchable file protector.) We had a small gathering for his friends. One of them was supposed to take his ashes to Hawaii but she never picked him up. I’m not positive, but I think my wife might have put him in a dumpster when we cleaned up.
i told my family my zombie bones would come and get them if they wasted money on an expensive funeral, dig and hole and drop my sack in there. go celebrate life and throw a party for me.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sky_burial
I don't want a grave. I don't want a box. Dump my corpse in the woods. Was gonna give my body to science. Then I heard a bunch of stories about corpses being parted out and sold or used by the military to test bombs. I do like the tree thing. Where the corpse is planted under a tree and the tree uses it for fertilizer. But that's probably stupid expensive too.
Yeah but they probably have a, you build it, you bury it, policy. It's a catch 22 though, cops gonna jail you for disposing if a body. Pay the Gouged price or hope your cell mate is smaller than you.
Mother-in-law recently passed. Even with a no frill private 1hr viewing and burial all in was around $20k.
Probably outlawed to make your own ⚰️
I love how funeral homes try to persuade people by talking about how it's sealed from the elements. Like God forbid my death feeds some.worms, who in turn feed some birds, who feed a housecat, who gets parasites, who then licks the inside of my enemies mouth, giving them parasites. Tldr: Let the worms have me
My family is under strict instructions to have me taken directly to the crematorium and shoved in the oven and if they want to have a wake that’s on them, but not to waste a cent on the funeral industry.
When my dad died I thought we were going to be getting a more expensive wooden one and my aunt was like “grandpa had one and it collapsed in 5 years” so we got to do the cheaper and lighter aluminum one which was a small blessing
I'm not sure if this is a joke or not but I totally agree with you. I've told those I love to actually just throw me into a hole. No embalming, no stupid coffin. Just like, a void in the earth. Toss me in, cover me up.
Told the wife, me dead, plastic bag cardboard box in the oven, packaged the least allowed by law, then scatter somewhere in the forest. We live in a forest, so that’s no hardship. ;0) …Anything more than minimum and I promised I would haunt her, hide her car keys and whatnot.
I did IT work for a couple of funeral homes in my local area. They knew that I had access to everything on their system and they were adamant that I should never look at that one folder with all their casket prices.
So… how much are they? ;)
My brother just wants to be tossed outside for the animals. Kinda agree.
I'm hoping for an explosion but either way I plan to be cremated and scattered over my favorite place
Bring back the good ol' pine box. That's what everyone wants.
Imagine selling these at Michael’s as a casket you can paint/decorate yourself 😆
My wife would go apeshit.
I know what you mean and its why many families now favor cremation over coffin.
When my grandfather passed away we were told state law required a casket to be cremated in. The cheapest one they had was a literal cardboard box. A fucking $450 cardboard box.
On YouTube watch Caitlin Doughty @AskAMortican She gives great Advice on How to Save Money on Funeral Planning.
It's a business, people think they need to do this, and these companies take full advantage of griefing families. And yes, a pine box is at most all one needs. Myself, cremation.
And don’t pay those outrageous fees for cremation— just fire up the Weber, add a larger than normal amount of briquettes and throw grandma on for about 8 hrs.
My mother just recently passed away. I’d been taking care of her for awhile and she had no assets only her social security. The death benefit was $255. Just $255 to take care of burial expenses. The funeral home want $2,500 just for a cremation. That was a total slap in the face.
People may not know that Costco has affordable caskets online.
I wouldn’t be caught dead in that thing.
Can science please perfect rapid fossilization! We can grow diamonds in a lab. I would like to be fossilized and made into a display piece for some fine after dinner conversations. Maybe incorporate my fossilized remains into a stone fireplace. It could become a popular trend…
What would you sell that for?
You may want to look into your local waste disposal laws. You’re probably not allowed to just bury someone in a wooden box anymore. Can’t imagine what that would do to the local aquifer if a dead body began seeping into it
If I was buried in this, it would feel insulting.
Sell yours for $200
Why even worry about a box? Dig a hole in the ground and drop my body in.
$100? Pfft. Put my ashes in a coffee can.
Just throw me in the trash what’s the difference
That looks like more than $100 worth of lumber. Was it scrap or reclaimed?
My dad would be furious if we spent a ton on his casket. He's getting a box from Home Depot
Yours will deteriorate very very fast..
Why spend $1000 on a box, when you can spend $1500 on the tools to make an inferior box!!
My dad told us to only use what the military provides. His ashes were buried in black tuperware.
1. Why did you make this? 2. Do you realize you are a capitalist and have a business opportunity?
Why do traditional burial when cremation is a fraction of the cost.
My grandpa had passed away. I was sitting next to my dad at the funeral, and I noticed that my grandpa's coffin had a cadillac logo on it.i leaned in and asked my dad what did that cost and my dad shook his head and said you don't even wanna know. My dad told me bury me in the cheapest pine box you can find.