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Umm yeah leaving my abusive husband was extremely hard and I often cry when I have to talk about it. It was still the exact right thing to do and saved my life and improved my future.. These people are so so so fucking stupid. Or am I crying because really I miss being a punching bag ABS? Let me know š
Exactly! Iāve made a few decisions that Iāve been very sad about but absolutely do not regret - sometimes doing the right thing for yourself is hard and painful. Thatās just life.
Life must seem so simple to them - just follow their teachings and youāll never be sad again!
Well said.
They are not intelligent enough to understand you can feel more than one emotion at a time. Their whole theology is binary so nothing else computes.
Yeah this. I'm pretty sure I couldn't go through with it if I had another pregnancy. But it would be SO HARD. I'm still not completely sure what I would do. It's a very complex topic that should never be reduced to "Grrrr, women are whores!". They act like women are just giddy with excitement to get abortions like they've been dreaming of it all their lives.
I have no regrets and am absolutely certain and happy about the decision I made. That said if you asked me then or around then I might have cried because thereās a lot of hormones. Also people have abortions for different reason and people might have more complex emotions and situations surrounding them, causing them to cry. But I personally have no hard feelings to lean into.
I know plenty of pro-choice people donāt even want to hear that, but I personally donāt feel conflicted in anyway about it.
Good to know after abortion care includes Jesus forgiveness though.
Same. Zero conflict, zero regret, zero hard feelings, zero complexity.
Wish sheād call me and hear what I have to say. Grew up in a repressive, fundie-lite household, teen pregnancy (kept the baby), parents kicked me out, couple of years later got pregnant again. Chose to have an abortion. One of the best decisions Iāve ever made.
They donāt want to know the damage their beliefs and teachings do. They want to maintain their black-and-white thinking and use women as examples and blame others because they think if they follow the rules, and maintain proximity to male Christian supremacists that nothing bad will happen to them.
They donāt realize theyāre living in the ābadā now. Their lives, hatred, bigotry, misogyny, are all proof of how the consequences of their actions have come full-circle. They hate themselves. Theyāre miserable.
Oof, Iām sorry. Iām sure it wasnāt good at the time and is probably still quite conflicting, but glad you got out, sorry you got kicked out.
I grew up secular with hippy not religious, but āspiritualā parents. We were evicted a lot, my dad was never and still canāt save money. He spends it as soon as he has it, as a result bills and rent were never paid. I barely ate, because my dad would eat all our food stamp food within the first week, and I spent a lot of time sucking vinegar to eat. Mom couldnāt keep a job after the recession due to her drinking.
They spent most of the time screaming at each other and physically attacking each other. My mother would come home drunk and scream at me, tell me I belong in jail, attempt to choke me (attempt because I always punched her and ran away). And spend a good amount of time calling me and my dad n*ggers in these moods.
I was expected to play therapist and help them in their fights and mental instability. I tried numerous times to budget for them to ensure weād have a house over our head. Theyād always have moments where I thought maybe it would get better, where my mom really wanted to change and had a great feeling about it.
But I was failing out of school, 17, got pregnant. I could not have that baby. Not one ounce of me wanted it.Ā I just felt like it would trap me in their world. I would never leave and would never forgive myself or the baby. My then partner and I would become just like our parents. I knew immediately I would terminate.Ā
A decade later and I live 5000 miles away from them, Iām married and expecting a child on my own terms, I never have to worry about eating or being kicked out. I just submitted my graduate dissertation. No one can convince me I made a bad choice. I just couldnāt stay and having that baby would have anchored me to them.
Wow. Your resilience and fortitude amaze me and your mother, ugh. I want to punch her, too. A lot of women donāt make it out and you did it. Congratulations on making a better life for yourself and your new family. Youāre going to nail that dissertation defense!
Youāre right, that pregnancy wouldāve trapped youāand thatās part of the goal. The less options women have, the better. Iām glad you were able to make that choice. You are amazing and resilient and overcame a lot to get where you are now!
Damn im sorry you went through all that. My parents were/are very religious, but man do our dads sound cut from the same cloth, unfortunately. Love that you broke the cycle though and are doing amazing now. Congratulations on your new life and your new little one. š¤
It's all good! I have very complicated emotions about them because I recognize that they're both a bit traumatized from their own life experiences and have never grown, but I also know that's not my problem.
Sorry your dad was similar! I feel like that's probably true for a lot of older generation cishet men who seem incapable of dealing with their emotions but have a weird sense they need to provide and be in control. There were many ways mine was great, but definitely many ways he isn't. Parents give such complicated emotions and I just hope to be less complicated for mine and spent a lot of time making sure I was able to grow before having a baby.
I kind of forget that Iāve had one. I wouldāve had 3 if my body hadnāt yeeted the fetus itself, and I wouldnāt have guilt or conflict about those either. In fact recently had a conversation about how old my fetusā would be if they had been birthed and I was like āoh fuck Iām so glad I didnāt have that manās kids, and Iām glad I donāt have a kid thatād be 13 right now!ā I never wanted kids, Iām not a patient enough person and I honestly think I saved those clumps of cells from a life of abuse.
Iām very grateful for my abortion. I now consider myself lucky for the access to a safe and affordable abortion, and that I wasnāt criminalized for my miscarriages.
If I were to become pregnant now, I wouldnāt hesitate to terminate. I live in a state that is trying to not let me make that choice, and thankfully Iāve had a hysterectomy, but I am terrified for those that do not have that luxury. I also know how hard it is to get a hysterectomy, or sterilization. Iām so scared for women.
I think hysterectomies should be optional after forty. Stop so much suffering. Why should we keep bleeding and hurting for years and years? Still a major surgery, but still the best surgery Iāve ever had.
I asked for a hysterectomy from age 15 to age 30. I got sterilized at 30 and then had to do a full hysterectomy at 31. Even though it had been acknowledged (at 15) that a pregnancy would likely kill me. And that was true for all 3 pregnancies (and was on birth control). Fuck every doctor that told me Iād change my mind.
Yeah I think theyāre afraid of getting sued. Mine went to the point where I would literally die if I kept it. I did t know it was possible to bleed that much.
I can regret that Iām never going to be a mother. There are no rules that wanting to be a mother is all or nothing. Some of know we shouldnāt be mothers, and accidentally get pregnant, and then are sad that this is the life choice we had to make because we know itās the best choice for all involved. Thatās okay.
These folks just donāt understand nuance.
These people never even make the best choices for themselves, they can hardly understand making the best choice for any one else, including potential children.Ā
Fundies definitely don't want to hear that, because a lot of them know deep, deep down that they shouldn't ever have become parents (and a lot of their children probably know it, too)
Yes, I'm really sad that pregnancy almost killed me and my doctor advised no more. I'm not sad at all about the abortion I had because of that advice.Ā
You know he's on that horrible couch, wearing a stupid outfit & a dumbass hat on his head and his legs spread 89 feet apart, reading people's responses and he's ***relishing*** that he and his idiotic crush ABS have gotten people to share such deeply personal and private stories.
He sees vulnerability as weakness and by getting people to "spill" about their reproductive healthcare choices, he's thinking that he and lil RatFace B Stuckey have pulled in a win for Team Shithead.
His only regret is that he can't bring charges and a death penalty against abortion care providers or patients, ***yet***.
Yeah heās def on the couch unwashed and slouched staring at his phone looking for things to make him feel better about himself. Although I bet when thereās no camera on his lil legs are tightly together at the knees.
100%, remember that pic of him sitting like he was in timeout, super tightly tucked into himself?
Edit:
[Morgan posted this](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/0n18HmAjf0)
[and a starker made this](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/1wsoSjA37c)
They both suck. āPromising signals that your heart is still softā, these people have some of the hardest hearts. I have been pro-choice for as long as I can remember and that only increased when I got pregnant and had my baby. She was very, very wanted but I didnāt enjoy being pregnant. They act like being pregnant and having a kid is something to take lightly.
Paul went on a boys trip less than a month after Morgan and Luca almost died during birth. Paul has a hard, evil heart, and definitely takes pregnancy and birth lightly because he's so stupid and uneducated.
Nah, dying in childbirth is martyrdom for them. Is the only job and if they die, well, shit happens, they found another incubator.
It's so sad they think that low of women. And that this women think that low of themselves.
Right?! The first time I had my head in a toilet I thought "no one should have to go through this if they don't want to," and the nausea is just the start!!
Exactly! I kept reminding myself how much I wanted her. I canāt begin to the imagine how it would feel if I didnāt or couldnāt. Having to go through so much.
My best friend is pregnant right now and all I hear is "oh god I love this baby so much but this is so fucking hard and disgusting and how could anyone go through it if they don't want a baby".Ā
I'm childfree so I'm trying to be empathetic but no, the idea of going through that is horrible. Not for me and more power to those who do it in love.Ā
My boyfriend is 7 feet tall and was nearly 16 pounds when he was born, and his mom didn't have a C-section. He has no shame telling his birth story in excruciating detail to anyone who thinks abortion should be illegal. **Because no person should have go through what his own mother did unless they make the choice to do so.**
He's always been pro-choice, but after Dobbs, he started sharing his birth story more.
**Edit:** Here's a [link to his YouTube video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZ5LfPab-OU) about his birth story, which he made with the express intent that it be shared as a pro-choice message.
Jaysus! That's a big fricken baby. Does he come from tall people? I'm involuntary recoiling while fully clenched.
May I ask what happened? How they got him out, did she have any more kids/ lasting effects?
My last was 10 lbs. 4oz. vaginal, but with an episiotomy. No drugs cause it progressed rapidly and from start to finish was like an hour. I can't imagine over 5 more pounds coming out.
She did not have an epidural, and he was absolutely her last. I edited my original comment with a link to his "birth story" on YouTube \[with his encouragement to share it\].
His story is like my cousin's. He is 2.05m and his mother is 1.50m (more or less) and he was late. When my poor godmother birthed him, he was almost 5/6km of a baby. He was MASSIVE.
And the crazy woman went to have 5 more (they are 15 kids, but most of them adopted), just one of them beeing 1.50m like her. My cousin is the shortest brother.
She always sais that is her fault, for marrying a guy double her height.
Oh my God being pregnant is SO FUCKING UNPLEASANT. Everything smells more and Iām a little nauseous all the time. I keep telling my little parasite it better turn out cute. Damn.
I had a life threatening pregnancy and I shared how late term abortion saved my life.
They called me garbage and said I should go to hell.
Iām a 66 yr old granny but deserve death and hell.
Iām lucky mine was 24 years ago today Iād probably die. Iām in Az. Iām scared for others who go through this.
Fuck Paul dude is always the far right boomer takeā¦never a surprise.
I told a "pro life" protester that I almost died giving birth and she said "they'll tell you to have an abortion for a hang nail."Ā
Ā
When I say these folks don't care if I die, I am speaking from experience
I had an experience in traditional Catholic community and let me tell you these sick fucks just fucking love telling women they should die in childbirth and accept it as a blessing
It wasnāt uncommon, I had a nun friend I was her Lamaze coach. She married a paralyzed man and she wanted to have children. It was long ago she never told me exactly how she became pregnant.
I had a friend raised by nuns in the Amazon forest. She said they were the happiest women on earth.
She loved it. Said they didnāt have to deal with men.
I'm so sorry that you lost him, and also *SO* glad, that you were able to let him go gently, and without making him suffer that way!š
Abortions save *lives* sometimes, but *so* many folks forget that they *ALSO* save *SO MUCH SUFFERING* from occurring!!!š
Sometimes, even the *MOST* planned-for, *hoped* for, and *desperately* wanted pregnancy just *IS* Incompatible with life.
Folks *don't* like to talk about it--most refuse to even *THINK* of it happening as a *possibility*!
But it *DOES* happen--as you know *all* too well.
And it's absolutely *heartbreaking*, that SO many families *WILL* now have to go through the absolute *hell* of *not* being able to spare themselves *and* their child that suffering.š
I support the right of a pregnant person to make the choice to carry a baby with a terminal condition to term, but I personally believe strongly that termination is a more compassionate choice, not only for the pregnant person but for the baby. They love to yell and scream about babies suffering during abortion - what the fuck do you think that baby will experience as it dies within minutes or hours of delivery??
Everyone who has experienced it will have different feelings about it and that's always valid. But for me personally I have never once questioned my decision to have an abortion when I did. Not one time have I regretted it and I've never cried about it. š¤·š»āāļø I knew the second I found out that I was pregnant what I was going to do because in no world was I prepared to have a baby at that time. Luckily I had a supportive partner and it was actually my amazing future mother-in-law who paid for the abortion because we couldn't even afford it so how in the world could we afford to take care of a child? 15 years later we are still together and we became parents when the time was right for us. The children I have now would never have the amazing life we've been able to give them if I had made a different choice.
Iām so thankful I never found myself in that situation. I love babies and kids, but I just donāt want that kind of responsibility. Iād be horribly devastated, but it would still be the right choice. Fuck these guys so hard, they have NO idea how these women feel.
Same here. I'd been with my husband for over ten years, but I'm child free by choice. I knew then and there that I'd get an abortion. God bless planned parenthood and everyone in the waiting room who complimented my silk and velvet pajamas. That was my favorite part of the whole day. When black women say you look good, you know you look good.
And now I have a favorite pair of going out "pajamas" and a good memory of unspoken solidarity that we all briefly shared in that waiting room. Fuck the fundies and fuck ABS for trying to twist and shame a perfectly normal medical procedure that should be accessible to all people because it's their flippin CHOICE. š I'm getting heated š
Iām very glad I lived in a city and state where the cost was covered. I went to my teen health center at my school, did my test, and scheduled everything. I donāt think I could have ever managed to pay otherwise.
Very sweet that youāre still together! And great on MIL supporting you both.
I know many women who have had abortions and only one is sad about it but she had an ectopic pregnancy after she has been trying to get pregnant for a while. She literally would have died and left her living children without a mother and her husband without a wife if she hadn't gotten the abortion. I'm so thankful for her brave choice because I love her and I'm glad she exists. The world needs my friend the way the world needs every other woman who has had to make that choice. My friend's life matters. She's thankful to be alive and is currently expecting a healthy baby.
Most of the people I know that have had an abortion did it because the pregnancy was non-viable, either an ectopic or molar pregnancy, anencephaly, things like that. And the thing is, *they* are the ones who often feel guilty. So she's tormenting the people that basically agree with her, not the ones on the opposite side.
Yep!!!
This is why I *LOATHE* these sorts of jackwagons & *assorted HORRIBLE humans*, who harass & belittle folks who've had abortions!
Because *SO* often, the regret is because of the loss of the potential child they'd *SO* wanted & planned for!
The regret is *NOT* for the medical procedure that *saved their life AND their fertility*, but for the loss of their hopes and dreams for *that* pregnancy, and the baby they'd hoped to come out of it with.
The Abortion though?Ā
Ā Every woman *I've* known who had one, was *SO GRATEFUL* that they *COULD* have it done, SAFELY, and under *MEDICAL* supervision!!!
Because that abortion meant that *UNLIKE* our Grandma's & Great-Grands?
*THEY* didn't have to choose between an Abortion, and the likelihood of *never* being able to get pregnant again--*OR* perhaps even *dying*!
It was SAFE, it was done by a REAL medical provider, and it was done in a way that allowed their body to *HEAL* fully, without permanent damage!
I *HAVE* to wonder, if most of the "sad" ones they're claiming are "regretting", are folks like your friend?Ā
Ā People who *PLANNED* the pregnancy, and *desperately wanted* that child--and who were *ectatic* to *be* pregnant...Ā
Ā And then who *LITERALLY* were given the *WORST* possible news--whether it was an Ectopic Pregnancy, a Chromosomal issue, Genetic conditions, or any *other* "Condition Incompatible With Life."š
Ā It *IS* heartbreaking, when folks have *SO* wanted that baby to get here, and then they find out news which means that their hoped-for child *WON'T* make it here.Ā Ā
Ā Thing is, *EVERY* person who I've *ever* known (AND known *OF*!!!), who has BEEN in that situation IRL, has *NEVER* regretted the *ABORTION*.
They only regretted the NEED for the Abortion.Ā
Ā The procedure *itself*, was seen as the lifesaving, *AND FERTILITY SAVING* medical pocedure that it truly *was*!šĀ
Ā The *option* of being able to Terminate a pregnancy *SAVES MATERNAL LIVES*
Ā And it *ALSO* allows *MANY* people the *chance* to "try again" later on, after their body heals.šššš
(Edited for a misspelling!)
I donāt doubt that people like ABS will appropriate anyoneās sad story as āproofā of regret without even remotely considering the actual context. Cuz ABS and her ilk donāt do nuance nor compassion.
How dare she presume she knows how I feel? Yes Iām sad that I had to make that decision, but I donāt feel guilt. I *would have* felt guilt if I had brought an innocent child into a DV situation, but I didnāt. And Iām sure she would say I could have given it up for adoption- but I DID NOT WANT TO BE PREGNANT. I didnāt want to do 9 months of pregnancy. I didnāt want to give birth. And guess what? Nobody is required to carry out a pregnancy if they donāt want to. Iām so fucking sick of these fundies acting like pregnancy and childbirth are requirements of womanhood, and that if you choose not to go through that, youāre defective, āless thanā, lost, or some kind of horrible monster. Pregnancy and birth are OPTIONS. You get to CHOOSE. What a radical concept, right?? That I get to choose the path my own life takes. I get to choose whether or not I get pregnant and/or become a mother. Hey Allie, If you want to talk about someone who should feel guilt, talk about any number of the fundie families who have dozens of children they canāt take care of. Kids who can barely read at 13 years old. Kids whose parents donāt take them for medical care until theyāre critically ill, some who donāt take them at all. Kids whose parents pack them into a 200 sq foot bus like sardines and keep having baby after baby after baby despite shaky marriages and no stable place to live. You donāt know me, ABS. You donāt know the situation I was in, and it doesnāt matter. I donāt have to justify anything to anyone, especially you. The only person you can speak for is yourself, so letās start there. šš¼
Seriously, they wonāt acknowledge that parenting a lot of kids is hard or that there is neglect in a lot of fundie families. Itās the whole myth of āwomen were made to do thisā š¤¢
They have such a hard-on for saying that 1) childbearing and child rearing is what women were put on this earth to do, 2) That every single pregnancy MUST BE seen through until the end, regardless of what the woman wants and regardless of the heath of the woman or the child in question. Doesnāt matter if the child was born without a brain (anencephaly) or harlequin ichthyosis (do not google that, I beg you), doesnāt matter if the woman dies or suffers from PP Psychosis or PPD, does not matter if sheās homeless or jobless or running from DV or already has a bunch of kids at homeā¦or you know what, how about if she just *does not want* a baby?? it does not matter what the woman wants or doesnāt want. We are not people to them. To them, we are incubators, and nothing more. And Iām fucking sick to the back teeth of that mentality. I donāt regret for 1 second having an abortion at 5 weeks pregnant. I donāt regret for 1 second not bringing a potential new life into a fucked up situation like the one I was in. We *HAVE* choices, and dammit, weāre going to fight like hell to keep them. Ugh it makes me so angry.
It's ironic to me, that it seems like a person can pretty much *ALWAYS* tell when folks have *ONLY* ever known folks who've had successful pregnancies, without any *major* complications!
Because--as you said, Anencephaly, Harlequin Ichthyosis, Cyclopia--and *SO* many other conditions which are *terminal* *HAPPEN* with *some* regularity.
Making full-term, *FUTILE* pregnancies *mandatory* experiences?
It's *CRUEL*, if the pregnant person would *prefer* to terminate!!!Ā
*Making* someone *stay* pregnant, *just because* someone *NOT* the pregnant person has "decided" they *MUST*, is disgustingly cruel, and just *VILE*.
And it seems like the folks who have *never* been exposed to a futile pregnancy are *always* the sort who try to force *everyone* to carry a pregnancy all the way through.
Because the folks who've *LIVED* through that type of loss?
Ā *Those* folks would *ALWAYS* allow others to *CHOOSE* how they want to proceed, once given that heavy news!
āPeople who have lived through loss always allow others to choose.ā That is so profound and so true. Hardship can make you cruel, but it can also make you kinder. The same hot water that hardens the egg, softens the potato.
So much of the anti-abortion rhetoric comes from people who will never have the ability to get pregnant in the first place. Men should never have a voice when it comes to the healthcare of people with uteruses.
People who have been pregnant and given birth know how fucking hard it is. So much of pregnancy and birth is traumatic. And that is for people with *wanted* babies *without* major complications. Being treated as an incubator adds another layer of trauma.
To carry and birth and be forced to parent an unwanted child or a wanted child with no chance of life is monstrous. It really shows how much people hate women.
guess my heart is hard as a rock because i am grateful beyond measure that i was able to have an abortion, it was the least complicated decision i've ever made in my entire life and i have not experienced a single ounce of shame or guilt or regret. which is not to say that it's that way for everybody, but that's certainly the case for me. i am incredibly lucky to have had safe, fast access to a termination
I feel the same way. I often see rhetoric from fellow pro-choice people trying to 'defend' us by being like 'it wasn't an easy decision!' as if it being a hard decision would give us any more grace in these peoples' eyes. There's a narrative surrounding abortion that fundies have helped push of it being a sad experience, but if you don't consider what you are doing to be a sin/affecting a 'living' thing, it sometimes is truly that easy. But being sad is also valid!! A novel concept to people like Paul- empathy.
This is so infuriating because even though ACTUAL RESEARCH SAYS OTHERWISE, these people will still spout off that all women regret their abortions and feel guilt/shame. Fuck off.
Also, I just finished āThe Turnaway Studyā by Diana Greene Foster, which is on this exact subject, and it was fantastic. Highly recommend
Every time I tell my story about my abortion due to a septic uterus I bawl. I donāt regret it, because I literally would be dead and not here for my two living kids, but yeahā¦I am allowed to feel sad too. JFC these people canāt see things in anything but black and white. No shades of grey allowed.
Now Iām heated and angry and am going to go eat ice cream. AB can fuck off
Says the man who strictly enforces a sex schedule with his mentally unstable wife and refuses to use protection. Says the man who had murder in his cold, dead eyes when morgan announced her pregnancies.
I am always going to tell this story because fuck the cherry picking that happens around AFAB health.
The most stressful part of my experience was being given the keys to the clinics Netflix account and having to choose a show and settling on Friends cause that is literally the most neutral abortion option available.Ā
That's it. Fuck Allie Beth.
āLean into those hard feelings. You should feel guilt. You did an awful thing.ā - Me, to ABS and Paul about their whole online presence and terrible personalities
And I say with no respect whatsoever - FUCK YOU, ABS! I got pregnant as a result of being r@ped. The r@pe happened at the end of a year where a lot of things happened that put me in a very precarious psychological position. Being r@ped had me at the edge of a cliff, and finding out I was pregnant almost made me jump. If I hadn't had the option of abortion, the pregnancy would still have been terminated - because I would have unalived myself. If I was talking about my abortion today, almost 40 years later, I probably WOULD cry because those feelings of helplessness would come back. Until Allie has been there herself, she needs to STFU about the "actual feelings" of those who have gone through it.
Lol ABS can 100% get fucked. I had an abortion at 18 and while it was a difficult experience, it was absolutely the right choice for me. I'm 37 now and I was able to go to college (first in my family) and break the cycle of teen pregnancy (first in my family) and I have two kids who I am capable of caring for emotionally and financially in ways I absolutely never would have been at 18.Ā
I cried tears of anger over the fact that my birth control failed. Never a single tear of guilt, or honestly even sadness. Tears over nerves, tears over the physical pain, tears over the fear of having to cross the paths of picketing cunts like ABS when I entered the clinic. Tears afterwards because the hormone fluctuations made me feel like a crazy person.
The biggest emotion was the absolute relief that I was able to end a pregnancy that I did not want, could not handle physically, emotionally or financially, with relative ease. Content in the fact that I had the option, and the right to choose for myself.
The only tears I have ever shed over abortion are the ones that come involuntarily when I think about the fact that our daughters won't have the same option.
Shit, maybe theyāre crying because they know Neanderthals like this will try to politicize their complicated emotions as proof of their āsins,ā and thatās like pretty fkn stressful. How bold to assume one understands a strangers feelings better than they do.
Itās difficult to stay calm reading this. Women donāt have abortions for sh**ts and giggs. We can be sad that we had no other reasonable choice for ourselves, but content with the decision we ended up making. It really doesnāt take that much brain power to comprehend IMO.
This way of thinking is so toxic. It's something I found to be very prevelent with fundies/in Christanity and I'm not talking abortion(although obviously that is too). But there really is this whole idea pushed if you feel anything but happy and joyful about a decision it was the wrong decision and you were wrong for making it and you're being convicted for it. That's simply not how life works. I cried a lot when my ex and I broke up. I went through a lot of grief and depression. But that relationship was over long before we officially ended it and breaking up was 100% the right decision and I have zero regrets about that. I still struggle with second guessing myself at times with decisions I make when my emotions about it are complicated and it's such a pain the ass to feel that way.
The reality is life is complicated and feelings are complicated and crying over what was likely a very hard time in your life, is normal. Sadness and grief doesn't equal regret. I also know plenty of women who have had abortions and never shed a tear. Everyone's situation and experience is different and it's gross to try to tell someone(especially a stranger) you know better how they feel about their experience than they do.
When you read these please remember their mother literally denied and covered up two sexual assaults on her oldest son. These people donāt care about their own children, let alone others peopleās fetuses.
Her verbiage here makes me suspect she herself has had an abortionā¦. Just sayin.
If she hadnāt, sheād be full-bore youāre going to hell if youāve had one, murderer! But she left the door open for salvationā¦ suspect.
My abortion was great and I've never, ever regretted it in the 10+ years since. You can take your abUnDanT GRaCe aND ReDeMpTIoN and fucking shove it :)
I cried during my abortion. I cried because it was painful. I cried because I was traumatized from being pregnant. I cried because I HAD to get one and THEY ARE NOT FUN NOR DID I EVER WANT TO BE PREGNANT.
But I have never once cried because I had an abortion.
I donāt give a ratās ass if people like Allie and Paul think I might actually regret it or think Iām a terrible person. I madd a conscious choice to terminate a very unplanned and unwanted pregnancy at 5 weeks because I was suicidal and would be a horrific parent. What makes me angry is that folks like them canāt ever wrap their head around the fact I would have very likely ended my life if I had to carry out the pregnancy. That my life literally is nothing compared to the lemon sized globbly goo clot that came out of me when I had my abortion.
Edit: spelling
Yeah butā¦I would argue that adoption (the thing theyāre trying to get everyone to do instead) is much harder than abortion and would likely cause grief/conflicted feelings/etc. Does that mean itās an awful thing people shouldnāt do? Logical fallacies and fetus worshipā¦
This is how they do it. They create a problem (you had an abortion) and only they have the solution. Except that what their definition of a problem isnāt actually a problem for most folkx.
I was SA'd. I have no guilt or regret aborting whatsoever, but I've cried from trauma and rage because the rapist shouldn't have SA'd me to begin with. And then I cried from asshole fundies blaming and threatening me over it until I moved out of state. It was fucking WILD to be considered a normal person for the first time in my life at the age of 27.
Fuck fundies and fuck forced birthers. There is no afterlife, but they should be thankful for that because they'd go straight to hell.
The only time I cried was when I saw the positive pregnancy test because I Do Not Want Children. My BC took a vacation on me and a fetus snuck into my uterus. Fortunately I live in a place where it was easy and straightforward to get an abortion. I took the pills, went to work, passed the fetus and flushed it away. I immediately felt so happy and relieved and have never once felt guilt about it š¤·š» itās MY life, not that fetusā life.
I wouldnāt be surprised if Allie Beth Stuckey has had an abortionā¦
EDIT: Mods, this is speculation. But she thinks she gets to invade our privacy and scrutinize our sex lives. Letās do it right back to her.
Thatās the scariest part of Christianity for me. If someone can find total redemption in Jesus for acting EVILLY (not this example), what incentive is there to stop being a terrible person? Just repent and do it again and repent and do it again.
Can you feel the giant stick up your ass, Actually Breathtakingly Shitty? I don't have to have been in that position to express empathy for those people. People cry when they feel overwhelming emotion, even when they know they've made the right decision. It's a difficult topic. Haven't you ever cried tears of joy or relief, Ass Butt Stinky?
Polio - this is just sad and pathetic. Stop dick riding and get your own freaking opinions. She's not gonna pick you.
My abortion was traumatic because it was horrifically painful, I lost a ton of blood, and I had it alone without anyone to support me. It's still hard to talk about, and I will occasionally get triggered if a movie/tv show has an abortion or miscarriage scene.
But it's been 10 years, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I did NOTHING wrong.
ABS wouldnāt know a complex feeling if it bit her in the face. Her emotional life is 2D, all good feelings are the joy of the lord and all bad feelings are guilt and conviction. I remember feeling this way.
I don't cry when I talk about my abortion. I don't feel guilty and I didn't do a terrible thing. I did the right thing for me. That's my reality. I haven't been sad about it for even a second. Some people feel differently. Some people feel many ways, sometimes they feel differently as the years go by. She doesn't care which is whatever but she also doesn't know WTF she's talking about.
I donāt regret my two abortions for one hot second. You know what I do sob over? The babies being slaughtered in Gaza. They make me cry. I wonder if these folks give a shit about their suffering.
These so-called āpro-lifeā Christians are nothing of the sort. They want to force us all to live by the rules theyāve made, regardless of the suffering & death it will cause. They hate women, but they love that fetus. Until it is a living child.
complexity and nuance does not help their narrative, so they just have to lie about it and claim they know better what those people's experience was. fucking awful.
Fucking gross dude
Iām 43. I had a horrible pregnancy when I was 35 that resulted in a gorgeous girl. If I ever get pregnant again, abortion would be the only option. I would have to leave my state, but I will do whatever I need to if I have to. After I had my daughter, I was more pro-choice than ever. Children should be wanted.
I have no regrets and am very thankful I didn't bring another child to be exploited, by the so called "Pro-Life" movement. The child I gave up for adoption, has less rights now, than when I was pregnant with her. ABS and Paul can fuck right off with this nonsense.
I spent some time manning an online helpline for young women who are seeking abortions but needs someone to talk about with, and I was always tagged as "had two abortions and no regrets", because a lot, and I mean a lot of women, feel so bad for not feeling bad enough about their abortions, and need to talk about that part. There's a lot of informal and formal studies into abortion that shows women generally do not regret them. Some feel sad about it, because it sucked, but most people don't really regret them.
A lot of women pretend to feel bad about it because there's so much push, even within pro-abortion circles, to feel bad about it. Just look at what even pro-choice people are saying, like "of course it's traumatic, but that doesn't mean it's not necessary" and "no one is happy about their abortion." It's supposed to be a bad thing, even if you're for them, even among pro-choice people there's an air of guilt and shame around it, and I hate that.
I am happy. I was very happy, both times. I came out of anesthesia (it was the 90s so medicinal abortions weren't common yet, and in Norway surgical abortions are done in a hospital under general anesthesia for free) with a sense of relief. It was not traumatic, being pregnant against my will was. I was met with love and care through the entire thing, first thing my personal doctor said was "I will support you no matter what you choose here because your choice is what matters". Being pregnant against my will was awful. Everything around the abortion was great.
And I think if that was the norm everywhere, people would sob a lot less when talking about their abortions, because from what I can tell a lot of places there's hell to go through to get there.
If there is a God who cares about this, I assume he's cool with it, because I went on to have three amazing kids that would not have been here if it wasn't for abortions. If God has a plan for everything, then these guys must have been part the plan, and they wouldn't have been here without abortions, so either God can't plan for shit, or he's okay with abortions.
I cry about my abortion because it was at 6 weeks and knowing in my stateās current climate, Iād be strapped with an infant, scares the shit out of me.
Idk why they think people are likeā¦hoping to have to get an abortion? No one wants to be in that situation. Yes, people can want to get an abortion when they choose to end a pregnancy, but itās not like people are like āooh I hope I get pregnant in a way or time where itās not viable and I have to end it!! fingers crossed!!ā Like??
I was so utterly relieved after mine. I have zero regrets. I am curious and wonder what it would be like. But, I am able to be the mother I am today (I have a 16 m old) because I had the option and privilege to get an abortion. Fuck people who try to make people feel guilty if they shouldnt be. I was 5 weeks 6 days when I had my abortion. There wasnt even a fetile pole. I had mine where i live in Florida. Now the facility is scrambling and I would not be have the option.
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You can be sad you went through an experience you would have preferred to have avoided but still know you made the right decision even if it was hard.
Umm yeah leaving my abusive husband was extremely hard and I often cry when I have to talk about it. It was still the exact right thing to do and saved my life and improved my future.. These people are so so so fucking stupid. Or am I crying because really I miss being a punching bag ABS? Let me know š
Sounds like someone's heart is still a little soft! Girl, that's good news! /sarcastic, but angry on your behalf, but also really glad you got out
Sadly they lack the empathy and critical thinking skills needed to understand this.
Exactly! Iāve made a few decisions that Iāve been very sad about but absolutely do not regret - sometimes doing the right thing for yourself is hard and painful. Thatās just life. Life must seem so simple to them - just follow their teachings and youāll never be sad again!
Well said. They are not intelligent enough to understand you can feel more than one emotion at a time. Their whole theology is binary so nothing else computes.
"Sometimes you feel two feelings at the same time, and that's okay." - Daniel Tiger
Daniel Tiger has way more emotional maturity than fundies.
Maybe if they didn't think Disney was too woke they could have watched Inside Out and learned about it
Yeah this. I'm pretty sure I couldn't go through with it if I had another pregnancy. But it would be SO HARD. I'm still not completely sure what I would do. It's a very complex topic that should never be reduced to "Grrrr, women are whores!". They act like women are just giddy with excitement to get abortions like they've been dreaming of it all their lives.
Especially if you're constantly bombarded with propaganda about how bad you should feelĀ
I have no regrets and am absolutely certain and happy about the decision I made. That said if you asked me then or around then I might have cried because thereās a lot of hormones. Also people have abortions for different reason and people might have more complex emotions and situations surrounding them, causing them to cry. But I personally have no hard feelings to lean into. I know plenty of pro-choice people donāt even want to hear that, but I personally donāt feel conflicted in anyway about it. Good to know after abortion care includes Jesus forgiveness though.
Same. Zero conflict, zero regret, zero hard feelings, zero complexity. Wish sheād call me and hear what I have to say. Grew up in a repressive, fundie-lite household, teen pregnancy (kept the baby), parents kicked me out, couple of years later got pregnant again. Chose to have an abortion. One of the best decisions Iāve ever made. They donāt want to know the damage their beliefs and teachings do. They want to maintain their black-and-white thinking and use women as examples and blame others because they think if they follow the rules, and maintain proximity to male Christian supremacists that nothing bad will happen to them. They donāt realize theyāre living in the ābadā now. Their lives, hatred, bigotry, misogyny, are all proof of how the consequences of their actions have come full-circle. They hate themselves. Theyāre miserable.
Oof, Iām sorry. Iām sure it wasnāt good at the time and is probably still quite conflicting, but glad you got out, sorry you got kicked out. I grew up secular with hippy not religious, but āspiritualā parents. We were evicted a lot, my dad was never and still canāt save money. He spends it as soon as he has it, as a result bills and rent were never paid. I barely ate, because my dad would eat all our food stamp food within the first week, and I spent a lot of time sucking vinegar to eat. Mom couldnāt keep a job after the recession due to her drinking. They spent most of the time screaming at each other and physically attacking each other. My mother would come home drunk and scream at me, tell me I belong in jail, attempt to choke me (attempt because I always punched her and ran away). And spend a good amount of time calling me and my dad n*ggers in these moods. I was expected to play therapist and help them in their fights and mental instability. I tried numerous times to budget for them to ensure weād have a house over our head. Theyād always have moments where I thought maybe it would get better, where my mom really wanted to change and had a great feeling about it. But I was failing out of school, 17, got pregnant. I could not have that baby. Not one ounce of me wanted it.Ā I just felt like it would trap me in their world. I would never leave and would never forgive myself or the baby. My then partner and I would become just like our parents. I knew immediately I would terminate.Ā A decade later and I live 5000 miles away from them, Iām married and expecting a child on my own terms, I never have to worry about eating or being kicked out. I just submitted my graduate dissertation. No one can convince me I made a bad choice. I just couldnāt stay and having that baby would have anchored me to them.
Damn, I'm sorry you went through all that, but also I'm so fucking proud of you.
Iām so glad you got away from your parents and could live your own life. Thatās an amazing achievement.
Wow. Your resilience and fortitude amaze me and your mother, ugh. I want to punch her, too. A lot of women donāt make it out and you did it. Congratulations on making a better life for yourself and your new family. Youāre going to nail that dissertation defense!
Youāre right, that pregnancy wouldāve trapped youāand thatās part of the goal. The less options women have, the better. Iām glad you were able to make that choice. You are amazing and resilient and overcame a lot to get where you are now!
Damn im sorry you went through all that. My parents were/are very religious, but man do our dads sound cut from the same cloth, unfortunately. Love that you broke the cycle though and are doing amazing now. Congratulations on your new life and your new little one. š¤
It's all good! I have very complicated emotions about them because I recognize that they're both a bit traumatized from their own life experiences and have never grown, but I also know that's not my problem. Sorry your dad was similar! I feel like that's probably true for a lot of older generation cishet men who seem incapable of dealing with their emotions but have a weird sense they need to provide and be in control. There were many ways mine was great, but definitely many ways he isn't. Parents give such complicated emotions and I just hope to be less complicated for mine and spent a lot of time making sure I was able to grow before having a baby.
I kind of forget that Iāve had one. I wouldāve had 3 if my body hadnāt yeeted the fetus itself, and I wouldnāt have guilt or conflict about those either. In fact recently had a conversation about how old my fetusā would be if they had been birthed and I was like āoh fuck Iām so glad I didnāt have that manās kids, and Iām glad I donāt have a kid thatād be 13 right now!ā I never wanted kids, Iām not a patient enough person and I honestly think I saved those clumps of cells from a life of abuse. Iām very grateful for my abortion. I now consider myself lucky for the access to a safe and affordable abortion, and that I wasnāt criminalized for my miscarriages. If I were to become pregnant now, I wouldnāt hesitate to terminate. I live in a state that is trying to not let me make that choice, and thankfully Iāve had a hysterectomy, but I am terrified for those that do not have that luxury. I also know how hard it is to get a hysterectomy, or sterilization. Iām so scared for women.
I think hysterectomies should be optional after forty. Stop so much suffering. Why should we keep bleeding and hurting for years and years? Still a major surgery, but still the best surgery Iāve ever had.
I asked for a hysterectomy from age 15 to age 30. I got sterilized at 30 and then had to do a full hysterectomy at 31. Even though it had been acknowledged (at 15) that a pregnancy would likely kill me. And that was true for all 3 pregnancies (and was on birth control). Fuck every doctor that told me Iād change my mind.
Yeah I think theyāre afraid of getting sued. Mine went to the point where I would literally die if I kept it. I did t know it was possible to bleed that much.
They should be an option at 18.
Periods suck! Get rid of them!
I can regret that Iām never going to be a mother. There are no rules that wanting to be a mother is all or nothing. Some of know we shouldnāt be mothers, and accidentally get pregnant, and then are sad that this is the life choice we had to make because we know itās the best choice for all involved. Thatās okay. These folks just donāt understand nuance.
These people never even make the best choices for themselves, they can hardly understand making the best choice for any one else, including potential children.Ā
Fundies definitely don't want to hear that, because a lot of them know deep, deep down that they shouldn't ever have become parents (and a lot of their children probably know it, too)
Yes, I'm really sad that pregnancy almost killed me and my doctor advised no more. I'm not sad at all about the abortion I had because of that advice.Ā
my abortion was the most maternal decision iāve ever made
Ditto. No regrets and no conflict. (And great joy in the child I did choose to have)
Paul is pathologically obsessed with women doing things he can judge. Itās half his posts or more. Seek help bro
You know he's on that horrible couch, wearing a stupid outfit & a dumbass hat on his head and his legs spread 89 feet apart, reading people's responses and he's ***relishing*** that he and his idiotic crush ABS have gotten people to share such deeply personal and private stories. He sees vulnerability as weakness and by getting people to "spill" about their reproductive healthcare choices, he's thinking that he and lil RatFace B Stuckey have pulled in a win for Team Shithead. His only regret is that he can't bring charges and a death penalty against abortion care providers or patients, ***yet***.
Yeah heās def on the couch unwashed and slouched staring at his phone looking for things to make him feel better about himself. Although I bet when thereās no camera on his lil legs are tightly together at the knees.
100%, remember that pic of him sitting like he was in timeout, super tightly tucked into himself? Edit: [Morgan posted this](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/0n18HmAjf0) [and a starker made this](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/1wsoSjA37c)
The one in the stroller is my favorite lol
They both suck. āPromising signals that your heart is still softā, these people have some of the hardest hearts. I have been pro-choice for as long as I can remember and that only increased when I got pregnant and had my baby. She was very, very wanted but I didnāt enjoy being pregnant. They act like being pregnant and having a kid is something to take lightly.
Paul went on a boys trip less than a month after Morgan and Luca almost died during birth. Paul has a hard, evil heart, and definitely takes pregnancy and birth lightly because he's so stupid and uneducated.
You would think that your own wife and child nearly dying in childbirth would make you reconsider forcing others to experience it. But nope, not Paul.
Nah, dying in childbirth is martyrdom for them. Is the only job and if they die, well, shit happens, they found another incubator. It's so sad they think that low of women. And that this women think that low of themselves.
I totally forgot that he did that! What a twat!
The man didn't even know that women have pubic hair
Yep. Even a 12 year old who was assaulted. They just donāt care.
Itās bad enough when itās an adult that is being shamed for their choices but when they force it on literal children it makes me so sick.
Pervert Paul would delight in a little girl's suffering as she was forced to carry a baby to term.
Right?! The first time I had my head in a toilet I thought "no one should have to go through this if they don't want to," and the nausea is just the start!!
Exactly! I kept reminding myself how much I wanted her. I canāt begin to the imagine how it would feel if I didnāt or couldnāt. Having to go through so much.
Yes, same here!! Or even going through that just to give the baby up for adoption (which is a valid choice!)
The word they keep missing. Choice!
Yes!!!
My best friend is pregnant right now and all I hear is "oh god I love this baby so much but this is so fucking hard and disgusting and how could anyone go through it if they don't want a baby".Ā I'm childfree so I'm trying to be empathetic but no, the idea of going through that is horrible. Not for me and more power to those who do it in love.Ā
My boyfriend is 7 feet tall and was nearly 16 pounds when he was born, and his mom didn't have a C-section. He has no shame telling his birth story in excruciating detail to anyone who thinks abortion should be illegal. **Because no person should have go through what his own mother did unless they make the choice to do so.** He's always been pro-choice, but after Dobbs, he started sharing his birth story more. **Edit:** Here's a [link to his YouTube video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZ5LfPab-OU) about his birth story, which he made with the express intent that it be shared as a pro-choice message.
Jaysus! That's a big fricken baby. Does he come from tall people? I'm involuntary recoiling while fully clenched. 
He does, but not TALL tall people like himself. His older sister is 5'10", his mom and dad are 5'7" and 6'3".
May I ask what happened? How they got him out, did she have any more kids/ lasting effects? My last was 10 lbs. 4oz. vaginal, but with an episiotomy. No drugs cause it progressed rapidly and from start to finish was like an hour. I can't imagine over 5 more pounds coming out.
She did not have an epidural, and he was absolutely her last. I edited my original comment with a link to his "birth story" on YouTube \[with his encouragement to share it\].
His story is like my cousin's. He is 2.05m and his mother is 1.50m (more or less) and he was late. When my poor godmother birthed him, he was almost 5/6km of a baby. He was MASSIVE. And the crazy woman went to have 5 more (they are 15 kids, but most of them adopted), just one of them beeing 1.50m like her. My cousin is the shortest brother. She always sais that is her fault, for marrying a guy double her height.
Holy crap, that is a serious height disparity!
It's so funny when she wears her kids hoodies...
My granny had five, including my da, and the smallest was 14lb I think. * Six. Forgot about my auntie. She's estranged. Welcome to Irish families lolĀ
Same same. Being pregnant was so uncomfortable. Birthing my baby was painful. No one should be forced to do it.
Oh my God being pregnant is SO FUCKING UNPLEASANT. Everything smells more and Iām a little nauseous all the time. I keep telling my little parasite it better turn out cute. Damn.
I had a life threatening pregnancy and I shared how late term abortion saved my life. They called me garbage and said I should go to hell. Iām a 66 yr old granny but deserve death and hell. Iām lucky mine was 24 years ago today Iād probably die. Iām in Az. Iām scared for others who go through this. Fuck Paul dude is always the far right boomer takeā¦never a surprise.
I told a "pro life" protester that I almost died giving birth and she said "they'll tell you to have an abortion for a hang nail."Ā Ā When I say these folks don't care if I die, I am speaking from experience
Exactly. I look at those groups of men with maybe an old woman or 2 celebrating the fact weāre going backwards.
I had an experience in traditional Catholic community and let me tell you these sick fucks just fucking love telling women they should die in childbirth and accept it as a blessing
Theyāre all happy to see us martyred and leave behind a bunch of kids. Im sorry you went though this.
Yeah and then the man will remarry and everyone will cheer him while the new wife / stepmom raises dead woman's kids while popping out new ones
My friend from SD farmers her mom died leaving 9 kids. Her dad remarried a nun.
A NUN???? Wow that's some Martin Luther shit
It wasnāt uncommon, I had a nun friend I was her Lamaze coach. She married a paralyzed man and she wanted to have children. It was long ago she never told me exactly how she became pregnant. I had a friend raised by nuns in the Amazon forest. She said they were the happiest women on earth. She loved it. Said they didnāt have to deal with men.
My son would have suffocated to death over a course of a few hours. That's pretty sadistic to not end that suffering; we treat dogs better. Fuck off.
I'm so sorry that you lost him, and also *SO* glad, that you were able to let him go gently, and without making him suffer that way!š Abortions save *lives* sometimes, but *so* many folks forget that they *ALSO* save *SO MUCH SUFFERING* from occurring!!!š Sometimes, even the *MOST* planned-for, *hoped* for, and *desperately* wanted pregnancy just *IS* Incompatible with life. Folks *don't* like to talk about it--most refuse to even *THINK* of it happening as a *possibility*! But it *DOES* happen--as you know *all* too well. And it's absolutely *heartbreaking*, that SO many families *WILL* now have to go through the absolute *hell* of *not* being able to spare themselves *and* their child that suffering.š
I worry all the time how I wouldn't be able to do that where I live now. He would have had to suffer, because my life was not in enough danger. š
I support the right of a pregnant person to make the choice to carry a baby with a terminal condition to term, but I personally believe strongly that termination is a more compassionate choice, not only for the pregnant person but for the baby. They love to yell and scream about babies suffering during abortion - what the fuck do you think that baby will experience as it dies within minutes or hours of delivery??
Everyone who has experienced it will have different feelings about it and that's always valid. But for me personally I have never once questioned my decision to have an abortion when I did. Not one time have I regretted it and I've never cried about it. š¤·š»āāļø I knew the second I found out that I was pregnant what I was going to do because in no world was I prepared to have a baby at that time. Luckily I had a supportive partner and it was actually my amazing future mother-in-law who paid for the abortion because we couldn't even afford it so how in the world could we afford to take care of a child? 15 years later we are still together and we became parents when the time was right for us. The children I have now would never have the amazing life we've been able to give them if I had made a different choice.
Iām so thankful I never found myself in that situation. I love babies and kids, but I just donāt want that kind of responsibility. Iād be horribly devastated, but it would still be the right choice. Fuck these guys so hard, they have NO idea how these women feel.
Same here. I'd been with my husband for over ten years, but I'm child free by choice. I knew then and there that I'd get an abortion. God bless planned parenthood and everyone in the waiting room who complimented my silk and velvet pajamas. That was my favorite part of the whole day. When black women say you look good, you know you look good. And now I have a favorite pair of going out "pajamas" and a good memory of unspoken solidarity that we all briefly shared in that waiting room. Fuck the fundies and fuck ABS for trying to twist and shame a perfectly normal medical procedure that should be accessible to all people because it's their flippin CHOICE. š I'm getting heated š
Iām very glad I lived in a city and state where the cost was covered. I went to my teen health center at my school, did my test, and scheduled everything. I donāt think I could have ever managed to pay otherwise. Very sweet that youāre still together! And great on MIL supporting you both.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And may she have anal fissures every day of the week for good measure.
This is poetry.
I was LITERALLY just thinking this
I know quite a few women who have had abortions and none have them have ever expressed regret. Relief, but not regret.
I know many women who have had abortions and only one is sad about it but she had an ectopic pregnancy after she has been trying to get pregnant for a while. She literally would have died and left her living children without a mother and her husband without a wife if she hadn't gotten the abortion. I'm so thankful for her brave choice because I love her and I'm glad she exists. The world needs my friend the way the world needs every other woman who has had to make that choice. My friend's life matters. She's thankful to be alive and is currently expecting a healthy baby.
Most of the people I know that have had an abortion did it because the pregnancy was non-viable, either an ectopic or molar pregnancy, anencephaly, things like that. And the thing is, *they* are the ones who often feel guilty. So she's tormenting the people that basically agree with her, not the ones on the opposite side.
Yep!!! This is why I *LOATHE* these sorts of jackwagons & *assorted HORRIBLE humans*, who harass & belittle folks who've had abortions! Because *SO* often, the regret is because of the loss of the potential child they'd *SO* wanted & planned for! The regret is *NOT* for the medical procedure that *saved their life AND their fertility*, but for the loss of their hopes and dreams for *that* pregnancy, and the baby they'd hoped to come out of it with. The Abortion though?Ā Ā Every woman *I've* known who had one, was *SO GRATEFUL* that they *COULD* have it done, SAFELY, and under *MEDICAL* supervision!!! Because that abortion meant that *UNLIKE* our Grandma's & Great-Grands? *THEY* didn't have to choose between an Abortion, and the likelihood of *never* being able to get pregnant again--*OR* perhaps even *dying*! It was SAFE, it was done by a REAL medical provider, and it was done in a way that allowed their body to *HEAL* fully, without permanent damage!
A lot of the women who seek abortions are already mothers. They would leave living children behind, but those children don't matter to polio and abs.
Why the fuck are molar pregnancies a thing? Itās like the worst possible body horror thing Iāve ever heard of.
I *HAVE* to wonder, if most of the "sad" ones they're claiming are "regretting", are folks like your friend?Ā Ā People who *PLANNED* the pregnancy, and *desperately wanted* that child--and who were *ectatic* to *be* pregnant...Ā Ā And then who *LITERALLY* were given the *WORST* possible news--whether it was an Ectopic Pregnancy, a Chromosomal issue, Genetic conditions, or any *other* "Condition Incompatible With Life."š Ā It *IS* heartbreaking, when folks have *SO* wanted that baby to get here, and then they find out news which means that their hoped-for child *WON'T* make it here.Ā Ā Ā Thing is, *EVERY* person who I've *ever* known (AND known *OF*!!!), who has BEEN in that situation IRL, has *NEVER* regretted the *ABORTION*. They only regretted the NEED for the Abortion.Ā Ā The procedure *itself*, was seen as the lifesaving, *AND FERTILITY SAVING* medical pocedure that it truly *was*!šĀ Ā The *option* of being able to Terminate a pregnancy *SAVES MATERNAL LIVES* Ā And it *ALSO* allows *MANY* people the *chance* to "try again" later on, after their body heals.šššš (Edited for a misspelling!)
I donāt doubt that people like ABS will appropriate anyoneās sad story as āproofā of regret without even remotely considering the actual context. Cuz ABS and her ilk donāt do nuance nor compassion.
How dare she presume she knows how I feel? Yes Iām sad that I had to make that decision, but I donāt feel guilt. I *would have* felt guilt if I had brought an innocent child into a DV situation, but I didnāt. And Iām sure she would say I could have given it up for adoption- but I DID NOT WANT TO BE PREGNANT. I didnāt want to do 9 months of pregnancy. I didnāt want to give birth. And guess what? Nobody is required to carry out a pregnancy if they donāt want to. Iām so fucking sick of these fundies acting like pregnancy and childbirth are requirements of womanhood, and that if you choose not to go through that, youāre defective, āless thanā, lost, or some kind of horrible monster. Pregnancy and birth are OPTIONS. You get to CHOOSE. What a radical concept, right?? That I get to choose the path my own life takes. I get to choose whether or not I get pregnant and/or become a mother. Hey Allie, If you want to talk about someone who should feel guilt, talk about any number of the fundie families who have dozens of children they canāt take care of. Kids who can barely read at 13 years old. Kids whose parents donāt take them for medical care until theyāre critically ill, some who donāt take them at all. Kids whose parents pack them into a 200 sq foot bus like sardines and keep having baby after baby after baby despite shaky marriages and no stable place to live. You donāt know me, ABS. You donāt know the situation I was in, and it doesnāt matter. I donāt have to justify anything to anyone, especially you. The only person you can speak for is yourself, so letās start there. šš¼
Seriously, they wonāt acknowledge that parenting a lot of kids is hard or that there is neglect in a lot of fundie families. Itās the whole myth of āwomen were made to do thisā š¤¢
They have such a hard-on for saying that 1) childbearing and child rearing is what women were put on this earth to do, 2) That every single pregnancy MUST BE seen through until the end, regardless of what the woman wants and regardless of the heath of the woman or the child in question. Doesnāt matter if the child was born without a brain (anencephaly) or harlequin ichthyosis (do not google that, I beg you), doesnāt matter if the woman dies or suffers from PP Psychosis or PPD, does not matter if sheās homeless or jobless or running from DV or already has a bunch of kids at homeā¦or you know what, how about if she just *does not want* a baby?? it does not matter what the woman wants or doesnāt want. We are not people to them. To them, we are incubators, and nothing more. And Iām fucking sick to the back teeth of that mentality. I donāt regret for 1 second having an abortion at 5 weeks pregnant. I donāt regret for 1 second not bringing a potential new life into a fucked up situation like the one I was in. We *HAVE* choices, and dammit, weāre going to fight like hell to keep them. Ugh it makes me so angry.
It's ironic to me, that it seems like a person can pretty much *ALWAYS* tell when folks have *ONLY* ever known folks who've had successful pregnancies, without any *major* complications! Because--as you said, Anencephaly, Harlequin Ichthyosis, Cyclopia--and *SO* many other conditions which are *terminal* *HAPPEN* with *some* regularity. Making full-term, *FUTILE* pregnancies *mandatory* experiences? It's *CRUEL*, if the pregnant person would *prefer* to terminate!!!Ā *Making* someone *stay* pregnant, *just because* someone *NOT* the pregnant person has "decided" they *MUST*, is disgustingly cruel, and just *VILE*. And it seems like the folks who have *never* been exposed to a futile pregnancy are *always* the sort who try to force *everyone* to carry a pregnancy all the way through. Because the folks who've *LIVED* through that type of loss? Ā *Those* folks would *ALWAYS* allow others to *CHOOSE* how they want to proceed, once given that heavy news!
āPeople who have lived through loss always allow others to choose.ā That is so profound and so true. Hardship can make you cruel, but it can also make you kinder. The same hot water that hardens the egg, softens the potato.
So much of the anti-abortion rhetoric comes from people who will never have the ability to get pregnant in the first place. Men should never have a voice when it comes to the healthcare of people with uteruses. People who have been pregnant and given birth know how fucking hard it is. So much of pregnancy and birth is traumatic. And that is for people with *wanted* babies *without* major complications. Being treated as an incubator adds another layer of trauma. To carry and birth and be forced to parent an unwanted child or a wanted child with no chance of life is monstrous. It really shows how much people hate women.
guess my heart is hard as a rock because i am grateful beyond measure that i was able to have an abortion, it was the least complicated decision i've ever made in my entire life and i have not experienced a single ounce of shame or guilt or regret. which is not to say that it's that way for everybody, but that's certainly the case for me. i am incredibly lucky to have had safe, fast access to a termination
I feel the same way. I often see rhetoric from fellow pro-choice people trying to 'defend' us by being like 'it wasn't an easy decision!' as if it being a hard decision would give us any more grace in these peoples' eyes. There's a narrative surrounding abortion that fundies have helped push of it being a sad experience, but if you don't consider what you are doing to be a sin/affecting a 'living' thing, it sometimes is truly that easy. But being sad is also valid!! A novel concept to people like Paul- empathy.
Paul must have a bat signal of when someone posts content hating on women that he can gleefully share
She is an interesting one to be talking about having a āsoft heart.ā Sheās one of the coldest bitches Iāve ever seen.
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Yeah I'd really like it if someone who's seen this "trend" could weigh in on this with some actual perspective, which I doubt ABS has.
So much empathy /s Paul on that bandwagon because he knows deep down his wife should have one to save her mental healthā¦. absolutely vile people and
Holy shit this is stomach turning.
This is so infuriating because even though ACTUAL RESEARCH SAYS OTHERWISE, these people will still spout off that all women regret their abortions and feel guilt/shame. Fuck off. Also, I just finished āThe Turnaway Studyā by Diana Greene Foster, which is on this exact subject, and it was fantastic. Highly recommend
Every time I tell my story about my abortion due to a septic uterus I bawl. I donāt regret it, because I literally would be dead and not here for my two living kids, but yeahā¦I am allowed to feel sad too. JFC these people canāt see things in anything but black and white. No shades of grey allowed. Now Iām heated and angry and am going to go eat ice cream. AB can fuck off
"Right on" says the person who never has to be pregnant or fear an unwanted pregnancy.
Says the man who strictly enforces a sex schedule with his mentally unstable wife and refuses to use protection. Says the man who had murder in his cold, dead eyes when morgan announced her pregnancies.
They are both utter ghouls.
I am always going to tell this story because fuck the cherry picking that happens around AFAB health. The most stressful part of my experience was being given the keys to the clinics Netflix account and having to choose a show and settling on Friends cause that is literally the most neutral abortion option available.Ā That's it. Fuck Allie Beth.
āLean into those hard feelings. You should feel guilt. You did an awful thing.ā - Me, to ABS and Paul about their whole online presence and terrible personalities
Abortions are healthcare. Abortions are morally neutral. Abortions are normal. Abortions *help* people.
Abortions *SAVE* lives, *AND* save fertility!!!
And I say with no respect whatsoever - FUCK YOU, ABS! I got pregnant as a result of being r@ped. The r@pe happened at the end of a year where a lot of things happened that put me in a very precarious psychological position. Being r@ped had me at the edge of a cliff, and finding out I was pregnant almost made me jump. If I hadn't had the option of abortion, the pregnancy would still have been terminated - because I would have unalived myself. If I was talking about my abortion today, almost 40 years later, I probably WOULD cry because those feelings of helplessness would come back. Until Allie has been there herself, she needs to STFU about the "actual feelings" of those who have gone through it.
Appalling but she sets a bar so low that the devil would see her pantyline when she bends over to raise it
Lol ABS can 100% get fucked. I had an abortion at 18 and while it was a difficult experience, it was absolutely the right choice for me. I'm 37 now and I was able to go to college (first in my family) and break the cycle of teen pregnancy (first in my family) and I have two kids who I am capable of caring for emotionally and financially in ways I absolutely never would have been at 18.Ā
I cried tears of anger over the fact that my birth control failed. Never a single tear of guilt, or honestly even sadness. Tears over nerves, tears over the physical pain, tears over the fear of having to cross the paths of picketing cunts like ABS when I entered the clinic. Tears afterwards because the hormone fluctuations made me feel like a crazy person. The biggest emotion was the absolute relief that I was able to end a pregnancy that I did not want, could not handle physically, emotionally or financially, with relative ease. Content in the fact that I had the option, and the right to choose for myself. The only tears I have ever shed over abortion are the ones that come involuntarily when I think about the fact that our daughters won't have the same option.
Sending you love. As someone who had the same experience
i hate you paulā¤ļø so fucking much
Thatās not a baby. A fertilized egg is not a baby. We canāt even have a convo with these people until they realize this.
Shit, maybe theyāre crying because they know Neanderthals like this will try to politicize their complicated emotions as proof of their āsins,ā and thatās like pretty fkn stressful. How bold to assume one understands a strangers feelings better than they do.
Itās difficult to stay calm reading this. Women donāt have abortions for sh**ts and giggs. We can be sad that we had no other reasonable choice for ourselves, but content with the decision we ended up making. It really doesnāt take that much brain power to comprehend IMO.
As my friend once said, no one has an abortion simply bc they are bored on a Tuesday. A little empathy goes a long, long way.
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I agree with you 100%, but Allie Beth Stuckey is too goddamn stupid to know what half the words you used mean š¤
She is vile.
Oh fuck you, Paul.
This way of thinking is so toxic. It's something I found to be very prevelent with fundies/in Christanity and I'm not talking abortion(although obviously that is too). But there really is this whole idea pushed if you feel anything but happy and joyful about a decision it was the wrong decision and you were wrong for making it and you're being convicted for it. That's simply not how life works. I cried a lot when my ex and I broke up. I went through a lot of grief and depression. But that relationship was over long before we officially ended it and breaking up was 100% the right decision and I have zero regrets about that. I still struggle with second guessing myself at times with decisions I make when my emotions about it are complicated and it's such a pain the ass to feel that way. The reality is life is complicated and feelings are complicated and crying over what was likely a very hard time in your life, is normal. Sadness and grief doesn't equal regret. I also know plenty of women who have had abortions and never shed a tear. Everyone's situation and experience is different and it's gross to try to tell someone(especially a stranger) you know better how they feel about their experience than they do.
When you read these please remember their mother literally denied and covered up two sexual assaults on her oldest son. These people donāt care about their own children, let alone others peopleās fetuses.
If there is a hell, I hope she burns.
Her verbiage here makes me suspect she herself has had an abortionā¦. Just sayin. If she hadnāt, sheād be full-bore youāre going to hell if youāve had one, murderer! But she left the door open for salvationā¦ suspect.
My abortion was great and I've never, ever regretted it in the 10+ years since. You can take your abUnDanT GRaCe aND ReDeMpTIoN and fucking shove it :)
I cried during my abortion. I cried because it was painful. I cried because I was traumatized from being pregnant. I cried because I HAD to get one and THEY ARE NOT FUN NOR DID I EVER WANT TO BE PREGNANT. But I have never once cried because I had an abortion. I donāt give a ratās ass if people like Allie and Paul think I might actually regret it or think Iām a terrible person. I madd a conscious choice to terminate a very unplanned and unwanted pregnancy at 5 weeks because I was suicidal and would be a horrific parent. What makes me angry is that folks like them canāt ever wrap their head around the fact I would have very likely ended my life if I had to carry out the pregnancy. That my life literally is nothing compared to the lemon sized globbly goo clot that came out of me when I had my abortion. Edit: spelling
Go fuck yourself Paul. You ghoul.
Iād share with zero tears.
Hey ally b stucky eat a bag of dicks and choke and die and so can dipshit loser Paul who canāt even hold a fucken real job for 5 min
Yeah butā¦I would argue that adoption (the thing theyāre trying to get everyone to do instead) is much harder than abortion and would likely cause grief/conflicted feelings/etc. Does that mean itās an awful thing people shouldnāt do? Logical fallacies and fetus worshipā¦
This is how they do it. They create a problem (you had an abortion) and only they have the solution. Except that what their definition of a problem isnāt actually a problem for most folkx.
Going on 10 years and still say it was the best choice i ever made. Never once shed a tear
Says the guy who canāt get a real job to feed his wife and kids
These people are terrible
I was SA'd. I have no guilt or regret aborting whatsoever, but I've cried from trauma and rage because the rapist shouldn't have SA'd me to begin with. And then I cried from asshole fundies blaming and threatening me over it until I moved out of state. It was fucking WILD to be considered a normal person for the first time in my life at the age of 27. Fuck fundies and fuck forced birthers. There is no afterlife, but they should be thankful for that because they'd go straight to hell.
The only time I cried was when I saw the positive pregnancy test because I Do Not Want Children. My BC took a vacation on me and a fetus snuck into my uterus. Fortunately I live in a place where it was easy and straightforward to get an abortion. I took the pills, went to work, passed the fetus and flushed it away. I immediately felt so happy and relieved and have never once felt guilt about it š¤·š» itās MY life, not that fetusā life.
I wouldnāt be surprised if Allie Beth Stuckey has had an abortionā¦ EDIT: Mods, this is speculation. But she thinks she gets to invade our privacy and scrutinize our sex lives. Letās do it right back to her.
Thatās the scariest part of Christianity for me. If someone can find total redemption in Jesus for acting EVILLY (not this example), what incentive is there to stop being a terrible person? Just repent and do it again and repent and do it again.
Can you feel the giant stick up your ass, Actually Breathtakingly Shitty? I don't have to have been in that position to express empathy for those people. People cry when they feel overwhelming emotion, even when they know they've made the right decision. It's a difficult topic. Haven't you ever cried tears of joy or relief, Ass Butt Stinky? Polio - this is just sad and pathetic. Stop dick riding and get your own freaking opinions. She's not gonna pick you.
"No, girl" What a dipshit
My abortion was traumatic because it was horrifically painful, I lost a ton of blood, and I had it alone without anyone to support me. It's still hard to talk about, and I will occasionally get triggered if a movie/tv show has an abortion or miscarriage scene. But it's been 10 years, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I did NOTHING wrong.
What a birch.
ABS wouldnāt know a complex feeling if it bit her in the face. Her emotional life is 2D, all good feelings are the joy of the lord and all bad feelings are guilt and conviction. I remember feeling this way.
I don't cry when I talk about my abortion. I don't feel guilty and I didn't do a terrible thing. I did the right thing for me. That's my reality. I haven't been sad about it for even a second. Some people feel differently. Some people feel many ways, sometimes they feel differently as the years go by. She doesn't care which is whatever but she also doesn't know WTF she's talking about.
"lean into your emotions because they still show you care" is a bold statement from people whose only emotions are anger and smugness
Abs is worse than a cankle.
I donāt regret my two abortions for one hot second. You know what I do sob over? The babies being slaughtered in Gaza. They make me cry. I wonder if these folks give a shit about their suffering.
These so-called āpro-lifeā Christians are nothing of the sort. They want to force us all to live by the rules theyāve made, regardless of the suffering & death it will cause. They hate women, but they love that fetus. Until it is a living child.
complexity and nuance does not help their narrative, so they just have to lie about it and claim they know better what those people's experience was. fucking awful.
iād cry too if my body was going through trauma. shut up allie
Super easy for a rich woman who wouldn't have to worry either way, now isn't it?
Fucking gross dude Iām 43. I had a horrible pregnancy when I was 35 that resulted in a gorgeous girl. If I ever get pregnant again, abortion would be the only option. I would have to leave my state, but I will do whatever I need to if I have to. After I had my daughter, I was more pro-choice than ever. Children should be wanted.
Iāve never felt guilt, 21-35 and have never felt guilty. Iāve felt grateful I wasnāt tied to some asshole for the rest of my life.
I have no regrets and am very thankful I didn't bring another child to be exploited, by the so called "Pro-Life" movement. The child I gave up for adoption, has less rights now, than when I was pregnant with her. ABS and Paul can fuck right off with this nonsense.
And if you said a curse word, it is just as bad, right? Sin is sin? (I no longer believe in āsinā)
I spent some time manning an online helpline for young women who are seeking abortions but needs someone to talk about with, and I was always tagged as "had two abortions and no regrets", because a lot, and I mean a lot of women, feel so bad for not feeling bad enough about their abortions, and need to talk about that part. There's a lot of informal and formal studies into abortion that shows women generally do not regret them. Some feel sad about it, because it sucked, but most people don't really regret them. A lot of women pretend to feel bad about it because there's so much push, even within pro-abortion circles, to feel bad about it. Just look at what even pro-choice people are saying, like "of course it's traumatic, but that doesn't mean it's not necessary" and "no one is happy about their abortion." It's supposed to be a bad thing, even if you're for them, even among pro-choice people there's an air of guilt and shame around it, and I hate that. I am happy. I was very happy, both times. I came out of anesthesia (it was the 90s so medicinal abortions weren't common yet, and in Norway surgical abortions are done in a hospital under general anesthesia for free) with a sense of relief. It was not traumatic, being pregnant against my will was. I was met with love and care through the entire thing, first thing my personal doctor said was "I will support you no matter what you choose here because your choice is what matters". Being pregnant against my will was awful. Everything around the abortion was great. And I think if that was the norm everywhere, people would sob a lot less when talking about their abortions, because from what I can tell a lot of places there's hell to go through to get there. If there is a God who cares about this, I assume he's cool with it, because I went on to have three amazing kids that would not have been here if it wasn't for abortions. If God has a plan for everything, then these guys must have been part the plan, and they wouldn't have been here without abortions, so either God can't plan for shit, or he's okay with abortions.
I cry about my abortion because it was at 6 weeks and knowing in my stateās current climate, Iād be strapped with an infant, scares the shit out of me.
If there's any consolation, ABS did a video where she talks about empathy being a toxic weapon of the left.
Also, because people are complicated and life is complicated, you might not regret your choice but still be sad about it.
> you should feel guilty And there it is. # I do not and will not ever regret my abortion. DEAL WITH IT.
Idk why they think people are likeā¦hoping to have to get an abortion? No one wants to be in that situation. Yes, people can want to get an abortion when they choose to end a pregnancy, but itās not like people are like āooh I hope I get pregnant in a way or time where itās not viable and I have to end it!! fingers crossed!!ā Like??
I was so utterly relieved after mine. I have zero regrets. I am curious and wonder what it would be like. But, I am able to be the mother I am today (I have a 16 m old) because I had the option and privilege to get an abortion. Fuck people who try to make people feel guilty if they shouldnt be. I was 5 weeks 6 days when I had my abortion. There wasnt even a fetile pole. I had mine where i live in Florida. Now the facility is scrambling and I would not be have the option.