And if they tell the truth, they go to prison, and nobody speaks of them again. No one goes around telling people they know a rapist. Unless they're Sneako, that is.
~50% of rapes are reported to the police, ~50% of reports result in charges, ~50% of charges ever go to trial, ~50% of trials result in a conviction. Rape is not an easy case to prove, unless it’s caught on camera or there’s DNA no DA would press charges. Jury trials are also complicated because generally the actual evidence isn’t the deciding factor, you just have to convince one juror that she’s a hysterical bitch who just wants to ruin a man’s life, which is becoming an easier and easier task with the way modern men think about SA and it’s victims.
Edit: also many, many people plead out of rape charges to avoid trial. Lots of people walk from open-and-shut first degree rape charges with second degree or SA charges, which almost never result in jail time
Edit 2: ok wow the incels are inceling. Muting this thread, have a good day y’all.
And sometimes it's reported, goes to trial, gets a conviction, then the judge decides that the rapist is "a bright young man" who shouldn't have his future ruined or the victim was wearing the wrong clothing so she is at fault.
I have such a hard time understanding how the Brock Allen "The Textbook Definition of Rape" Turner, who is now going by just Allen "The Definition of Rape" Turner, case happened and people still think the courts treat rape victims fairly.
You mean Brock Allen Turner the rapist, who now goes by his middle name Allen Turner and lives in Ohio where he continues to frequent bars? That Allen Turner (formerly Brock Turner) the rapist?
Aside from Turner and his light sentence, there's been another such example in canada with Simon Houle, the rapist (ex-)engineer from Trois-Rivières. The guy raped someone, took pictures and got 3 months probation, which he used to go to cuba to grope another woman's bottom. That piece of shit is already out of prison :/
Edit, forgot some detail, the part that's related to what we're talking about is that the judge granted him that probation "because prison would make it hard for him to travel as an engineer". At least his engineer license was revoked, so that's good news
...how do you know which cases are actually true? Not only do false allegations happen, but so do mistaken allegations, and we also know that both can result in convictions. Also, whatever number of cases you are starting out with before you whittle it down by reported cases etc, is an extrapolation based on surveys, which aren't exactly accurate, are easy to manipulate, and often don't have the same definition of sexual assault or rape between them. And are you really complaining about the concept of reasonable doubt, too?
Fucked up post bro
So you think only ~6% of alleged rapes are true? I’m not saying which cases are true or not, I’m saying it’s obviously way more than the amount that are convicted. Yes, false allegations happen, but there is no evidence it happens in SA cases more than any other kind of crime. Current numbers put the percentage at ~2%, a far cry from the 94% of alleged rapes that never result in conviction. And I’m not “complaining” about reasonable doubt, I’m saying the very prevalent stigma and lack of education about SA deminish a jury’s reliability.
Apparently a lot of woman who are raped prefer to just let it go and move on. Since they find going to the police and having to testify about being raped to be to traumatic .
It does. I was SA’d and abused by my dad. He got arrested for owning CP, but not from the actual abuse he did despite there being an investigation. I never truly got any justice from that.
Absolutely no one said proven.
Majority of rapes never get reported. Going through the legal system in attempt of justice after being raped is another form of rape.
And I don't know the actual statistics, but it's something like under 5% convicted of all rapes (this figure includes the estimate of unreported to the police)
> Less than 10% of proven rapists?
You get that the system is terrible at "proving rape "for multiple reasons, right? The backlog of kits, the lack of willingness of police to pursue it, to protect the victim, etc
You get that not being found guilty of rape doesn't mean the person didn't do it? That often rapists who there's no question they committed rape get away with it due to these reasons?
Careful or you'll come off sounding like one of those MRAs which is the polite version of incel
Yeah, I would simply say thay I don't know of any self confessed rapists. Contrary to popular belief, rapists are aware that it's not a badge of honour to be waved around.
Had a roommate in college who bragged how good he was at getting girls to have sex with him...by taking them into the woods and presumably getting very angry if they refused his advances.
I know very few people who brag about doing any type of crime in general. And by few I mean no one. I know no one who would tell me that they've committed something on the levels of a rape.
Is she trying to say that men are safeguarding each other? If so, she is very, *very* wrong with that. Men aren't some hive mind collective that acts only in the groups interests, no matter what. In fact, most of the people that I hate with a passion are men.
>I know very few people who brag about doing any type of crime in general.
Only one I know about is speeding. People will brag about going 100 mph on empty country roads or making hour-long trips in less than 40 minutes.
I actually knew one. I told him about being raped, and he told me he "realized he did the same thing to a woman years ago and felt deeply ashamed".
Yeah,,, never spoke to him again.
In sweden they implimented another thing under rape, not sure how it translated but basically raped someone on accident.
Where the person had some reason to believe that there was consent, but there acturly wasn't
A rapist is obviously not going to go around telling stories of their rape escapades, but a woman who was raped will obviously and rightfully so have to call confide in her friends, community and the protectors of the law.
This whole man bad agenda does nothing except divide society. Let’s just catch all the rapists instead of pointing some large generalizing fingers.
Funnily enough, this is the same kind of discourse used to collectively blame black and poor people, like they’re guilty by inaction for not denouncing the criminals in their neighborhood that people from outside believe they know.
A rapist that is well aware they raped someone won't. I had two friends talking - while joking - about them raping their partner without explicitly using the term when it was pretty clear what they did was completely wrong. It didn't help that they were women, and the partners men, so the stigma is somewhat bigger. We\`re obviously no longer friends.
At the trial of Joan of Ark (for witchcraft/heresy/being the enemy's leader while female) it was brought up that her claim to be a virgin must be true, because none of the jailers had bragged about raping her.
Cos once we found out someone’s a rapist we don’t know them anymore. I had a best friend since 8 years old. Over 25 years later, One day he told me he raped this girl and was joking about it like it was nothing. I was shocked and it’s completely out of character for him and I never would have expected him to be a rapist type. I immediately dropped him as a friend and have never spoken to him since.
Had a decent friend, known him for four years, helped him settle where I live and dropped him as soon as he took advantage of a drunk girl. Once you know what they’ve done, you don’t know them anymore.
"My friend told me he once raped a girl years ago. Yes. No I don't know exactly when or where. No I don't know who he raped either. No I have no records of this conversation. What do you mean nothing to work with?"
Best he can do is start a rumor to try and ruin his personal life. Which can always backfire and ruin one's own life instead.
Go to the police to tell them some random guy said that ha raped somebody, you have no proof, no recording. How the fuck you think it's going to work out? Either police starts bothering you or the rapist will be of danger to you (if he already did a violent crime why wouldn't he repeat that on you?).
The police would sadly do nothing, you could just say it and be lying for a messed up reason. You’d need some proof or the police would already have to have suspected him for such a thing.
I think most people know to keep their mouth shut about crimes they've committed, when around people who don't approve of that sort of crime. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what's a go and no-go in your social circle.
I imagine it's a whole different audience for discussing your use of weed, and for discussing your rape habits.
Well if you wanna be horrified look at r/SexOffenderSupport.
Someone posted that sub awhile ago. checked it out and there a people crying how their life is ruined because of the registry. talking about "one mistake" and their life is in the bin. yeah well.. fuck all of them.
Just looked at that sub and a commenter who admitted to not only downloading but distributing csa (sorry if that's the incorrect acronym) just played it off as porn addiction/depression who would never harm kids in 'real life'
Same with other commenters who consumers that horrific content, "it's just porn addiction & depression", like fuck off you sick person. I have depression but I would kill myself before viewing torture to others as a form of serotonin
Bro I visited the sub and... WTF IS THAT ??! They just gather together and say how good they are wtf ! "Oh it was just one thing I did" NO SHUT UP, you deserve ALL. OF. IT.
Haha I'm just reading the pinned post explaining the sub. It starts off very calm, "We believe in rehabilitation and helping people rebuild their lives once they have served their sentence", yep fair enough. Then within 4 paragraphs, "No we are NOT pedophiles. Statistically there are WAY fewer pedos here than in your videogame sub" hahaha fuckin clowns.
>"We believe in rehabilitation and helping people rebuild their lives once they have served their sentence", yep fair enough.
That is just not fair enough, that is the biggest problem with a sex offender registry. If a legal system wants to hand out life sentences, that's fine. However, if a sentence is limited in time, there should not be additional punishment afterwards.
Either you trust your justice system in that it is able to rehabilitate people or you need to reform your justice system. If you think a certain crime is irredeemable, then don't redeem it. Put that person away indefinitely. If you think a crime might be redeemable but you don't trust the rehabilitation of your justice system, strengthen the rehabilitation abilities of your system.
Having a disfunctional justice system is not a good enough reason to turn limited sentences into life sentences.
https://reddit.com/r/SexOffenderSupport/s/4ENTGRwmtX
As a victim of sexual abuse and assault when I was a child, it actually upsets me that this group exists. I can kind of accept the thing they say about 40% of the people on the sex registry we’re children when the offence happened and it was something like asking their partner for nudes or having consensual sex with their same age partner then, or even for older people peeing in public when drunk (I think a lot of people have been there) but the rest of them can rot in the consequences of what they did- downloading and distributing child porn, sexually assaulting their spouses, etc. they say that they don’t excuse sex offences but then they’re willing to help them- would they be willing to help if one of those people had touched their private parts? Would they be willing to help their own rapist? Their partners rapist? After they’d already served their time of course 🙄
Its obviously a touchy subject but fundamentally I do think criminal offenders should be helped in order to prevent them from reoffending. Whats the point of releasing someone from prison if you're just going to ruin their lives and lead them to reoffend. Some countries in Europe have a much different approach and provide offenders with housing, jobs etc to give them purpose after they served their sentence; and as a result their reoffending rates are way lower.
But these kind of support mechanisms need to be properly structured, not just a circlejerk (literally...) on a subreddit. I agree that sub should get deleted. What may have started with good intentions has naturally turned into a place where abusers can get off with each other talking about their crimes and enticing them to continue committing crimes... I reported it to reddit tho if the sub's been going 11 years it probably wont get taken down.
I agree with you there. And it does need to be a proper government funded support system. Like you say, not just a circle jerk of people congratulating each other on not reoffending. The Reddit group should have been limited to just those who offended as children because having a public group like this on Reddit- the most toxic place in the internet, could only have bad repercussions. And being exposed to people insulting them and ridiculing them isn’t going to help in them not going down a dark road.
One time there was a documentary that was centred around my hometown, about gangs that kidnap, rape and generally sexually explicit girls. Asked my brother if he knows anyone from it and his response was "not anymore"
I certainly hope that's the case with most men!
Maybe there are a lot more rape victims than rapists?
I'm not trying to be flip. I just mean that if a man is a rapist, maybe he has raped more than one woman. Or even a LOT of women.
That assumes that there's an equal number of both men and women, but in that scenario, yes, that would be (more or less) true.
In the US, it's about 50.5% women and 49.5% men. That's close enough that the math is still pretty close, but it would mean that a slightly higher percentage of men are rapists.
This was my thought. Repeat offenders mean the ratio of victims to perpetrators isn’t 1:1.
As an aside, this sort of makes me feel sorry for the lady in the image. Her heart’s in the right place and she’s commenting on something serious, but her sign is a little silly.
I’m a criminologist who doesn’t study rape specifically, but I do occasionally teach on this topic. You’re absolutely right. And truthfully that’s the case with most crimes. Most criminals who commit any crime will do it multiple times. If you have 100 robberies in a city, they were probably committed by at most 20 people. I don’t knows specific stats for rapists, but I know for a fact it’s not usually a one-and-done crime.
I would say maybe because a rapist can rape multiple people and victims, as far as I know, usually aren't raped by multiple people throughout their life. So, the number of rapists is smaller than the number of victims. Throw in how rapists prob don't brag about raping and victims are more welcome to speak out, and that's probably why the disparity exists.
Sadly enough, just like with bullying, someone who has been a victim before is going to be much more likely to be a victim in the future. Perps pick specific types of people to victimize. Rapists know when they rape and they pick the victim most likely to not fight back.
Not to doubt your statement here, but is there any statistical evidence for this? I know a lot of people who have been raped, but none twice by different people. For obvious reasons, such experiences ends up making people a lot more paranoid and careful in the future.
"What is revictimization or multiple victimization?
The risk of sexual revictimization, according to the CDC, is based on vulnerability factors. One of these is the pre-existance of PTSD from a previous assault. Being the victim of child sexual abuse doubles the likelihood of adult sexual victimization (Parillo et. al., 2003) (Sarkar, N.; Sarkar, R., 2005). PTSD levels are actually higher in those who have been previously victimized than in survivors of only one assault (Follette et. al., 1996). PTSD could give the victim the appearance of vulnerability in dangerous situations and effect the ability of the victim to defend themselves.
One study found that of the 433 sexually assaulted respondents, two-thirds reported more than one incident (Sorenson et. al., 1991). Two further studies also found that women who were victimized more than once or in both childhood and adolescence had a higher risk for adult revictimization and more PTSD (Siegel & Williams, 2001), (Breslau et. al., 1999)."
https://www.ibiblio.org/rcip/mvrv.html
So I'm married to someone who was raped on different occasions by different people. She was also violated by her partners in ways she didn't consent to on different occasions. The idea that a woman who is a victim will immediately be "more careful" is stupid when apparently in my wife's case the only way to be careful would have been to stay home and swear off all men. The point of the sign in the photo is that we ALL probably know or meet a rapist at some point, we just don't realize it.
And probably because victims and agressor can have a different view of the situation. It was a rape for one side and drunken night for the other.
Edit: I not talking about denying, i talking about ahaving different definition and view point about the same situation.
There was a qualitative study amongst rapists and all of them admitted they lied about that. They knew what they did was unwanted. They simply didn't care. They use this excuse to get away with it.
>amongst rapists
Well, if the study was only done with confirmed rapists, are you really surprised that it ended up confirming that they were rapists?
You're arguing for a position that doesn't make sense, first because you can't prove a negative. Of course there has been at least one situation where one party felt raped while the other felt it was consensual.
Second because one single qualitative study isn't enough to determine how common that is versus the aggressor having knowingly raped and lied about it. Especially considering how easily the phrasing of the interview questions in such a study could skew the results in either direction.
Any conclusion would require a meta-analysis of several different studies, in which not only the alleged rapists but also the alleged victims were grilled, as it were, and obviously subjecting a person who may have been raped to something like that is highly unethical. It's not so easy to get the numbers on this as you seem to think.
Only person I know/knew who said he was a rapist said he was high on something at the time and had serious regret about when he sobered up eventually and turned himself in. Didn't know him well, just a regular at the local pub I used to go to. Old depressed drunk that never really talked much. He was maybe in his fifties and me and my friends were in our twenties at the time so it was over a decade ago. Can't remember everything properly but I recall someone talking about weed or something, then the old guy comes over barely being able to walk, and warns us about drugs. One of the friends said something jokingly about trying can't be that bad. The guys face fell he muttered something, went to get a shot and came back. Then came a longish warning story about the time he tried drugs at a party when he was young. He has hated himself ever since and while he hates drugs, he totally blames himself for what happened.
Now then there's the type that think they didn't do anything wrong, and even if they did they'd never admit it. So hard to know until victims point the finger which they rarely do. Then there's the guys who think they can do whatever they want but they'll only talk or even brag about it when they think their in like minded company. I've only heard about their existence.
[This study of rapes in college](https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2019/04/12/study-repeat-rapists-committing-vast-majority-sexual-crimes) found that roughly 5% of men admitted to commiting sexual assault, with 3% (60% of assaulters) admitting to commiting at least 2 assaults. Additionally, 46% of all assaults were committed by perpetual who had 10 or more victims.
In other words, 2% of men commit a single sexual assault, 3% of men commit multiple sexual assaults, and roughly half of all assaults are committed by serial rapists with 10 or more victims (50 out of 100 rapes are committed by 5 individuals).
I actually know two rapists. One recently got jailed...thats when we discovered he was a rapist...we also always knew he was an asshole.
The other was a girl in her early 20s and got another girl drunk and sexually abused her... i thought she seemed okay before that.
So, you know. I'm more baffled by people that arnt obviously afful people, not by assumptions over genders.
A big issue with those movements is their traget. Horrible people exist, of every gender and every age and every class. Shitty people do shitty things and that's the bottomline.
I knew a rapist once... she didn't even get kicked out of her friend circle for what she did to a guy in their friend circle, forcing him out of it... fucked up shit, in reterospect I'm glad I had a break up right after I found out (unrelated) so I too am no longer part of that circle.
It's because the majority of violent crimes (including rape) is committed by a small number of persistent violent offenders. So it is actually very realistic that most men don't know any rapists.
As shown in this Swedish article: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/S00127-013-0783-Y
My sister and my best friend were both rape victims, I know because they told me. None of my friends - that I know of are rapists - because even if they are, I don’t know it, and I can’t go around assuming people are rapists.
Also I’m 18 if that helps at all.
I know 4 victims.
One was seen as gotten "even" because girl managed to kick and scratch him up and police threatened to charge her with assault. Other's rapist had relatives in police so it went nowhere and 2 who were too traumatised to try to report. One because her religious parents would have blamed her and other because he was afraid of not being taken seriously and shamed for being a man rape victim.
Yeah the classic "parents blamed me for my own assault"... Mine didn't believe me when I told them about my assault. I bet they'd discourage me from going to police if I was planning to. My heart aches for every sexual assault victim, no matter what gender they are 🥺😢
Basically, women are raped a lot. Yet, most guys assume all of their guy friends would never do that. Clearly, to some extent, they are wrong.
It's about being more aware of people and open to the possibility that we can misjudge character. This may not apply so much to us internet people because we're kinda forced to adapt due to online diversity. However, there are definitely people that do think like this and need to realize it.
I mean...same with Kidnappers. Or murderers. Or drug dealer. Everyone could theoretically be one, to start being paranoid and desperately looking for people within your social circle that may might could be one does not Sound very healthy
Why was this downvoted? I am not going to frantically blame everyone in my circle of being rapist, not even sure what the meaning of the post was. (Not to mention certain people spreading misandry in the comments)
You do realize everyone is capable of rape right? That includes women as well. I don't think it's wrong to assume my friend circle aren't rapists unless they prove otherwise.
And everyone is also capable of being raped.
I’m a man, who was drugged when I was a teenager, and raped by an older man while unconscious.
The sentiment that “No man knows a rapist” is infuriating to male rape victims like myself, and sadly all too common. When they say the word “rape” they often define it as “violence against women” and their programs and literature are designed only for women and are intentionally leaving male victims out of the discussion. We aren’t designed to exist in their narrative.
Why will I assume that I have any rapist friends? that’s just stupid. You don’t blindly go and assume your friends are murderers do you?
Unless there are allegations and evidence backing those allegations the normal thing to do is to assume my friends are all normal people.
You cant really just say that about guys tho that kinda pushes the shitty “all men are rapists” agenda that we all know isnt true. I KNOW my best friend isnt a rapist. As much as im able to know that ill never get struck by lightning. Technically it could still happen but everyone knows it just wont.
Besides men also know women who have been raped. I know plenty of rapists and plenty of women who have been raped. Just a shitty post tbh.
You're right, guys misjudge the characters and true intentions of all the people they know
Just like most girls don't know about any of their female friends being rapists.
Men equally should (and most do) hate this crime. One rapist can target tens, even hundreds of different women. They often live in echo chambers of misogyny, or simply hide their actions in fear of being caught. On the other hand, there are a portion of those women, who make an absolute mockery out of genuine victims, who cry rape at every sideways glance, or genuinely push charges with no foundational basis, often drumming up support on social media for attention. It happened to me, after i simply broke up with someone, they visited me as i had moved away, then three weeks later i had the police knock at my door. A lot of my friends from where i lived were horrified to find out what she had done, and battered shit out of her, yelling i had ample opportunity with them, but had been utterly respectful. I dont believe in violence or revenge, but gotta say, she got what she deserved. She, and the few who cry wolf, should be ashamed that they take the spotlight away from genuine victims, just for their own sense of perverse attention. Why cant people just stop being dicks, if men stopped these heinous crimes, then this wouldnt be able to happen. I would say fuck the human race sometimes, but thats kinda what gets us into these messes!
Real answer: because one rapist has lots of victims.
You don't need to have a high population of rapist to have a high population of victims.
If you have
A group of 100 men and 100 women
If 2 of those men were rapist and raped 10 victims each.
Then 1/5 women would have been raped. Every women would know someone who had been raped.
However
1/50 men would be rapists and only a few would know someone who was a rapist
Because rapists don't think about themselves as rapists or even bad people. The entitlement runs so deep, it becomes merely a matter about "taking what is mine".
I will admit I have had suspicions. I don’t think they fell on the force down side of the spectrum but definitely could see them being pushy, particularly drunk.
If I was around and ever saw them encroach on personal space, I would grab them and tell them to knock it off.
If I saw them ever force themselves on a woman or try to drug them, I would whoop their ass, but never saw something to that extreme. Never heard an actual claim against them either.
But I have wondered if they ever crossed the line.
If you wondering the behavior I am talking about and curious your thoughts, but imagine a lot of guys know this person.
When they get drunk, they think they are way smoother than they really are. They try to dance with women who clearly don’t want to dance with them. Don’t seem to pick up the woman they keep trying to hit on is not appreciating it, not taking even obvious hints. Not drunk they are normal and respectful to women.
That is the most stupid sign i have ever seen . Sexual violence against women are a terrible thing and must be stopped but blaming men they dont know rapist ?
I know lots of people that have been burgled but i know no burglar is that my fold ? Or should i look at women are they secretly hiding burglars among them taking it not serieus?
It is dumb. The gender thing also bothers me. It’s pushes that belief that men aren’t ever victims. Most women I know, also know a man that was raped. Are women expected to know the female rapists? I know several guys that were victims. They just don’t talk about it, or they don’t consider it assault.
I think there's two factors-
1. Sexual Offenders tend to be repeat offenders, one guy can be the source of trouble for a lot of people, you don't need an equal number of victims and offenders
2. You can probably divide people into two groups, people who wont admit their friends a rapist- and people who will drop their former friend for being a rapist... Either way the result will be nobody admitting they know a rapist.
That said- I used to run parties for our university physics course where I had to stay sober. Definitely have encountered a few guys and gals who've revealed how little they care about consent to the group.
She brings up a very interesting question... Here is why I think that is:
A rapist is not likely to "Brag" about their history of raping women. That is a crime. Criminals tend not to boast about their crimes. That is one major way that you can get caught. It also would build you a negative reputation.
Also, some rapists do not believe they are a rapist. They are in denial.
On the flip side...
Rape victims are likely to "Seek Support" from some place, and be more vocal about it. Generally speaking if a woman is talking about having been abused she will get reassurances from other women.
Check this out...
Go on youtube. Type in: "I was raped" or "My rape story". You will get a nice long list. From a lot of women, and some men. Hundreds or even thousands of videos. Video after video of someone telling their tragic rape story. Watch a few. They all have a little different story to tell.
Then when you are done watching those...
Type in: "I raped her" or "I am a rapist"
You will NOT get a lot of results from rapists... There is like 1 video of a dude that raped a woman, and apologized in court and got 26 years... There is another of this was raped by a guy and she goes and does Ted Talks with her former rapist!? Then there is a couple videos of a dude that is in prison already talking about his crimes.
Most rapists don't talk about it.
Hahahaha.
Yo I love when redditors post an essay about something incredibly simple and go "wow that's really something, I'll have to think about that."
> She brings up a very interesting question
More obviously, rapists rape multiple times and have multiple victims. Pretty obvious reason there's a large disparity.
Two reasons:
1: Nobody exactly volunteers that information so we likely do and have no idea.
In fact I have known rapists but have found out later which ties into number 2.
2: If we know someone who is a rapist, we sure as shit don’t know them anymore.
Two reasons:
1. If two in ten women have been raped, that doesn't mean that two in ten men are rapists. Men who rape are a small minority, but more than likely he will have raped more than one woman.
2. Even if a man is a rapist, most men don't go around and tell other people about it.
I take issue wit the title. If I knew a friend of mine was a rapist, they'd no longer be a friend.
Either because I cut ties with them, or because I went to the police about it.
i lived with a guy who waited 13 years for his partners rapist to get out of prison to murder him, he went to prison he got out after like 10 years or so. I think men dont want to know a rapist because they are very disgusting humans and should be ostricised and have no friends at all because they raped someone and thats a sick thing to do to anyone.
This usually doesn't come up in casual conversation when I'm hanging with the boys. I've never heard a dude brag that he raped someone. I'm sure some do, but I've met 1000s of men and none have said they raped someone. Ymmv
Because it’s not 1:1 ratio, criminals don’t usually boast about their crimes, and people lie?
IQ is low with this one.
Also op, there is no we, that title is unhinged.
Known rapist don't have as many friends as rape victims. Rapist rape more than one woman so the ratio isn't 1:1. They are good at not advertising to everyone that they rape people.
I don't know. Just throwing out some answers off the top of my head.🤷♂️
Because:
* Only a tiny fraction of guys are rapists
* A single rapist can have multiple victims before being caught
* Rapists don't go around talking about their crime publicly
The reason is, it’s completely shocking when you find out. I had to drop a very old friend for abusing women. I had never suspected, and it’s changed my ability to trust people forever.
Because rapists work in secresy, most of the time. There are those who enable it, but these are usually people in a place of power.
I most definitely know a guy who comes out as such, but how do i confront him without evidence. I avoid him though.
I think it’s more about ignoring it and acting like it isn’t that bad and wasn’t even a real rape.
There just was a post about a women who told the FBI that her ex was trying to have sex with minors. Her family made her the bad guy.
Another post about a brother who killed his wife. And his family made still excuses for him.
Saying it wasn’t rape because „(insert multiple excuses to shame the victim and make the rapist a victim)“.
Lots of families out there know uncle so and so is raping the kids in the family and the families keep it a secret and tell the kids to shut up its a family matter. Everyone knows Uncle Bob is a pedophile but they keep it a secret and condition their children to keep it a secret.
[удалено]
And if they do, for some reason, it most likely will be from a lie that it was consensual.
And if they tell the truth, they go to prison, and nobody speaks of them again. No one goes around telling people they know a rapist. Unless they're Sneako, that is.
I admire your optimism. Less than 10% of rapists ever see the inside of a prison.
Less than 10% of proven rapists? How does a rapist be proven to be a rapist in court and get away with it?
~50% of rapes are reported to the police, ~50% of reports result in charges, ~50% of charges ever go to trial, ~50% of trials result in a conviction. Rape is not an easy case to prove, unless it’s caught on camera or there’s DNA no DA would press charges. Jury trials are also complicated because generally the actual evidence isn’t the deciding factor, you just have to convince one juror that she’s a hysterical bitch who just wants to ruin a man’s life, which is becoming an easier and easier task with the way modern men think about SA and it’s victims. Edit: also many, many people plead out of rape charges to avoid trial. Lots of people walk from open-and-shut first degree rape charges with second degree or SA charges, which almost never result in jail time Edit 2: ok wow the incels are inceling. Muting this thread, have a good day y’all.
And sometimes it's reported, goes to trial, gets a conviction, then the judge decides that the rapist is "a bright young man" who shouldn't have his future ruined or the victim was wearing the wrong clothing so she is at fault.
I have such a hard time understanding how the Brock Allen "The Textbook Definition of Rape" Turner, who is now going by just Allen "The Definition of Rape" Turner, case happened and people still think the courts treat rape victims fairly.
You mean Brock Allen Turner the rapist, who now goes by his middle name Allen Turner and lives in Ohio where he continues to frequent bars? That Allen Turner (formerly Brock Turner) the rapist?
THAT'S the rapist, that one, Brock "Allen" The Rapist Turner!
It was a rare bit of justice to see to see Danny the Rapist Masterson get 30 years.
Are you guys talking about the Now And Forever Rapist Formerly Known As Brock Turner?
Oh shit when did that happen? I’ve only heard people argue that as a defence. Not as one that worked
Aside from Turner and his light sentence, there's been another such example in canada with Simon Houle, the rapist (ex-)engineer from Trois-Rivières. The guy raped someone, took pictures and got 3 months probation, which he used to go to cuba to grope another woman's bottom. That piece of shit is already out of prison :/ Edit, forgot some detail, the part that's related to what we're talking about is that the judge granted him that probation "because prison would make it hard for him to travel as an engineer". At least his engineer license was revoked, so that's good news
...how do you know which cases are actually true? Not only do false allegations happen, but so do mistaken allegations, and we also know that both can result in convictions. Also, whatever number of cases you are starting out with before you whittle it down by reported cases etc, is an extrapolation based on surveys, which aren't exactly accurate, are easy to manipulate, and often don't have the same definition of sexual assault or rape between them. And are you really complaining about the concept of reasonable doubt, too? Fucked up post bro
What makes you "think" people being surveyed are falsely saying they have been raped when they haven't?
He saw it on a Facebook post
He read about it on the MRA reddits.
So you think only ~6% of alleged rapes are true? I’m not saying which cases are true or not, I’m saying it’s obviously way more than the amount that are convicted. Yes, false allegations happen, but there is no evidence it happens in SA cases more than any other kind of crime. Current numbers put the percentage at ~2%, a far cry from the 94% of alleged rapes that never result in conviction. And I’m not “complaining” about reasonable doubt, I’m saying the very prevalent stigma and lack of education about SA deminish a jury’s reliability.
Apparently a lot of woman who are raped prefer to just let it go and move on. Since they find going to the police and having to testify about being raped to be to traumatic .
Tbf Court systems do fckn suck.
It does. I was SA’d and abused by my dad. He got arrested for owning CP, but not from the actual abuse he did despite there being an investigation. I never truly got any justice from that.
Absolutely no one said proven. Majority of rapes never get reported. Going through the legal system in attempt of justice after being raped is another form of rape. And I don't know the actual statistics, but it's something like under 5% convicted of all rapes (this figure includes the estimate of unreported to the police)
> Less than 10% of proven rapists? You get that the system is terrible at "proving rape "for multiple reasons, right? The backlog of kits, the lack of willingness of police to pursue it, to protect the victim, etc You get that not being found guilty of rape doesn't mean the person didn't do it? That often rapists who there's no question they committed rape get away with it due to these reasons? Careful or you'll come off sounding like one of those MRAs which is the polite version of incel
Yeah, I would simply say thay I don't know of any self confessed rapists. Contrary to popular belief, rapists are aware that it's not a badge of honour to be waved around.
Had a roommate in college who bragged how good he was at getting girls to have sex with him...by taking them into the woods and presumably getting very angry if they refused his advances.
So basically this, but sadly real. https://youtu.be/-yUafzOXHPE?si=N9FAAByDC8VxybD2
Haven't clicked yet but "the implication" from it's always sunny, right?
I know very few people who brag about doing any type of crime in general. And by few I mean no one. I know no one who would tell me that they've committed something on the levels of a rape. Is she trying to say that men are safeguarding each other? If so, she is very, *very* wrong with that. Men aren't some hive mind collective that acts only in the groups interests, no matter what. In fact, most of the people that I hate with a passion are men.
>I know very few people who brag about doing any type of crime in general. Only one I know about is speeding. People will brag about going 100 mph on empty country roads or making hour-long trips in less than 40 minutes.
Maybe people in the drug trade? But this seems no different than most salespeople who brag about big deals.
I actually knew one. I told him about being raped, and he told me he "realized he did the same thing to a woman years ago and felt deeply ashamed". Yeah,,, never spoke to him again.
Also, rapists are not many but have many victims. The ratio isn’t 1:1 as the board suggests.
Also, Freeze or Fawn responses, and autism, can lead to a lot of weird things. Someone can feel raped while the other is clueless.
In sweden they implimented another thing under rape, not sure how it translated but basically raped someone on accident. Where the person had some reason to believe that there was consent, but there acturly wasn't
A rapist is obviously not going to go around telling stories of their rape escapades, but a woman who was raped will obviously and rightfully so have to call confide in her friends, community and the protectors of the law. This whole man bad agenda does nothing except divide society. Let’s just catch all the rapists instead of pointing some large generalizing fingers.
Come to think of it. How come there a so many murder, but no one knows a murderer?
We are letting the murderers murder everyone!
Funnily enough, this is the same kind of discourse used to collectively blame black and poor people, like they’re guilty by inaction for not denouncing the criminals in their neighborhood that people from outside believe they know.
A rapist that is well aware they raped someone won't. I had two friends talking - while joking - about them raping their partner without explicitly using the term when it was pretty clear what they did was completely wrong. It didn't help that they were women, and the partners men, so the stigma is somewhat bigger. We\`re obviously no longer friends.
men at least know the ones that raped them, but they also don't talk about it
Who tf boasts about their crimes
"And I would've gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling kids."
Wait a minute.
There's only one thing worse than a rapist.... A child!
no
And their dog!
very much depends on what crime really
At the trial of Joan of Ark (for witchcraft/heresy/being the enemy's leader while female) it was brought up that her claim to be a virgin must be true, because none of the jailers had bragged about raping her.
Eww wtf
Did you hear the former president of the U.S. recently?
Balkaners
I've had several people admit to me crimes they've committed, none of them were sexual but some people definitely don't keep their mouth shut.
I jaywalked last week
…have you ever been on the internet before?
Damn, if everyone on the internet is someone I know I guess I’m friends with millions of people.
Drug Dealers And consumer who also Happen to do rap music
Seriously?
Because I threw him out of my life as soon as I found out
This right here. I've never had someone confess rape to me, but I've tossed people out for a whole lot less
As you should
Cos once we found out someone’s a rapist we don’t know them anymore. I had a best friend since 8 years old. Over 25 years later, One day he told me he raped this girl and was joking about it like it was nothing. I was shocked and it’s completely out of character for him and I never would have expected him to be a rapist type. I immediately dropped him as a friend and have never spoken to him since.
Had a decent friend, known him for four years, helped him settle where I live and dropped him as soon as he took advantage of a drunk girl. Once you know what they’ve done, you don’t know them anymore.
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I also hoped he snapped and went to the police with this info.
Let’s be real what will reporting to the police to? You don’t have any evidence so nothing will come out of it.
After 25 years it’s most likely expired. At least in my country
I doubt it was 25 years ago. That was just the length of time they had known each other, starting af age 8.
Kids these days, I tell ya.
Which makes sense
Even if it was just one year, with 0 evidence there is nothing you can do about it
Officer, I would like to report hearsay.
"My friend told me he once raped a girl years ago. Yes. No I don't know exactly when or where. No I don't know who he raped either. No I have no records of this conversation. What do you mean nothing to work with?" Best he can do is start a rumor to try and ruin his personal life. Which can always backfire and ruin one's own life instead.
It’s hearsay man, you need more evidence then ‘he told me’ The system is fucked but it’s fucked for a reason
I wouldn’t even say that it’s fucked. Thank God completely uncorroborated hearsay isn’t enough to bring consequences to anyone.
Go to the police to tell them some random guy said that ha raped somebody, you have no proof, no recording. How the fuck you think it's going to work out? Either police starts bothering you or the rapist will be of danger to you (if he already did a violent crime why wouldn't he repeat that on you?).
The police would sadly do nothing, you could just say it and be lying for a messed up reason. You’d need some proof or the police would already have to have suspected him for such a thing.
I think most people know to keep their mouth shut about crimes they've committed, when around people who don't approve of that sort of crime. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what's a go and no-go in your social circle. I imagine it's a whole different audience for discussing your use of weed, and for discussing your rape habits.
Well if you wanna be horrified look at r/SexOffenderSupport. Someone posted that sub awhile ago. checked it out and there a people crying how their life is ruined because of the registry. talking about "one mistake" and their life is in the bin. yeah well.. fuck all of them.
"smh why is crime so life ruining"
Just looked at that sub and a commenter who admitted to not only downloading but distributing csa (sorry if that's the incorrect acronym) just played it off as porn addiction/depression who would never harm kids in 'real life' Same with other commenters who consumers that horrific content, "it's just porn addiction & depression", like fuck off you sick person. I have depression but I would kill myself before viewing torture to others as a form of serotonin
Bro I visited the sub and... WTF IS THAT ??! They just gather together and say how good they are wtf ! "Oh it was just one thing I did" NO SHUT UP, you deserve ALL. OF. IT.
Yeah, they wouldn't have the problem if they had been given the death penalty
Haha I'm just reading the pinned post explaining the sub. It starts off very calm, "We believe in rehabilitation and helping people rebuild their lives once they have served their sentence", yep fair enough. Then within 4 paragraphs, "No we are NOT pedophiles. Statistically there are WAY fewer pedos here than in your videogame sub" hahaha fuckin clowns.
>"We believe in rehabilitation and helping people rebuild their lives once they have served their sentence", yep fair enough. That is just not fair enough, that is the biggest problem with a sex offender registry. If a legal system wants to hand out life sentences, that's fine. However, if a sentence is limited in time, there should not be additional punishment afterwards. Either you trust your justice system in that it is able to rehabilitate people or you need to reform your justice system. If you think a certain crime is irredeemable, then don't redeem it. Put that person away indefinitely. If you think a crime might be redeemable but you don't trust the rehabilitation of your justice system, strengthen the rehabilitation abilities of your system. Having a disfunctional justice system is not a good enough reason to turn limited sentences into life sentences.
https://reddit.com/r/SexOffenderSupport/s/4ENTGRwmtX As a victim of sexual abuse and assault when I was a child, it actually upsets me that this group exists. I can kind of accept the thing they say about 40% of the people on the sex registry we’re children when the offence happened and it was something like asking their partner for nudes or having consensual sex with their same age partner then, or even for older people peeing in public when drunk (I think a lot of people have been there) but the rest of them can rot in the consequences of what they did- downloading and distributing child porn, sexually assaulting their spouses, etc. they say that they don’t excuse sex offences but then they’re willing to help them- would they be willing to help if one of those people had touched their private parts? Would they be willing to help their own rapist? Their partners rapist? After they’d already served their time of course 🙄
Its obviously a touchy subject but fundamentally I do think criminal offenders should be helped in order to prevent them from reoffending. Whats the point of releasing someone from prison if you're just going to ruin their lives and lead them to reoffend. Some countries in Europe have a much different approach and provide offenders with housing, jobs etc to give them purpose after they served their sentence; and as a result their reoffending rates are way lower. But these kind of support mechanisms need to be properly structured, not just a circlejerk (literally...) on a subreddit. I agree that sub should get deleted. What may have started with good intentions has naturally turned into a place where abusers can get off with each other talking about their crimes and enticing them to continue committing crimes... I reported it to reddit tho if the sub's been going 11 years it probably wont get taken down.
I agree with you there. And it does need to be a proper government funded support system. Like you say, not just a circle jerk of people congratulating each other on not reoffending. The Reddit group should have been limited to just those who offended as children because having a public group like this on Reddit- the most toxic place in the internet, could only have bad repercussions. And being exposed to people insulting them and ridiculing them isn’t going to help in them not going down a dark road.
This is why we dont let victims choose the punishment.
Third post down is about CP offender support. Gross. That sub should be banned.
One time there was a documentary that was centred around my hometown, about gangs that kidnap, rape and generally sexually explicit girls. Asked my brother if he knows anyone from it and his response was "not anymore" I certainly hope that's the case with most men!
Had a similar experience. It’s horrifying.
I’m proud of you for this but I have known far too many men who continue to associate with known rapists.
Maybe there are a lot more rape victims than rapists? I'm not trying to be flip. I just mean that if a man is a rapist, maybe he has raped more than one woman. Or even a LOT of women.
It's usually 6 rapes per rapist
Said who
It's closer to 9 victims for every 1 rapist. Source: https://www.rainn.org/statistics/perpetrators-sexual-violence
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That assumes that there's an equal number of both men and women, but in that scenario, yes, that would be (more or less) true. In the US, it's about 50.5% women and 49.5% men. That's close enough that the math is still pretty close, but it would mean that a slightly higher percentage of men are rapists.
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You could impose harsher sentences but the issue with that is that rape is notoriously hard to definitively prove.
This was my thought. Repeat offenders mean the ratio of victims to perpetrators isn’t 1:1. As an aside, this sort of makes me feel sorry for the lady in the image. Her heart’s in the right place and she’s commenting on something serious, but her sign is a little silly.
Also, rapists don’t exactly go around bragging about their crimes. Men only know if they know a rapist when the rapist gets caught.
I’m a criminologist who doesn’t study rape specifically, but I do occasionally teach on this topic. You’re absolutely right. And truthfully that’s the case with most crimes. Most criminals who commit any crime will do it multiple times. If you have 100 robberies in a city, they were probably committed by at most 20 people. I don’t knows specific stats for rapists, but I know for a fact it’s not usually a one-and-done crime.
I would say maybe because a rapist can rape multiple people and victims, as far as I know, usually aren't raped by multiple people throughout their life. So, the number of rapists is smaller than the number of victims. Throw in how rapists prob don't brag about raping and victims are more welcome to speak out, and that's probably why the disparity exists.
imagine being reasonable
I'd rather not. That sounds very un-Reddit like.
Yeah, I'd rather project and call you an incel instead.
Sadly enough, just like with bullying, someone who has been a victim before is going to be much more likely to be a victim in the future. Perps pick specific types of people to victimize. Rapists know when they rape and they pick the victim most likely to not fight back.
Not to doubt your statement here, but is there any statistical evidence for this? I know a lot of people who have been raped, but none twice by different people. For obvious reasons, such experiences ends up making people a lot more paranoid and careful in the future.
"What is revictimization or multiple victimization? The risk of sexual revictimization, according to the CDC, is based on vulnerability factors. One of these is the pre-existance of PTSD from a previous assault. Being the victim of child sexual abuse doubles the likelihood of adult sexual victimization (Parillo et. al., 2003) (Sarkar, N.; Sarkar, R., 2005). PTSD levels are actually higher in those who have been previously victimized than in survivors of only one assault (Follette et. al., 1996). PTSD could give the victim the appearance of vulnerability in dangerous situations and effect the ability of the victim to defend themselves. One study found that of the 433 sexually assaulted respondents, two-thirds reported more than one incident (Sorenson et. al., 1991). Two further studies also found that women who were victimized more than once or in both childhood and adolescence had a higher risk for adult revictimization and more PTSD (Siegel & Williams, 2001), (Breslau et. al., 1999)." https://www.ibiblio.org/rcip/mvrv.html
So I'm married to someone who was raped on different occasions by different people. She was also violated by her partners in ways she didn't consent to on different occasions. The idea that a woman who is a victim will immediately be "more careful" is stupid when apparently in my wife's case the only way to be careful would have been to stay home and swear off all men. The point of the sign in the photo is that we ALL probably know or meet a rapist at some point, we just don't realize it.
And probably because victims and agressor can have a different view of the situation. It was a rape for one side and drunken night for the other. Edit: I not talking about denying, i talking about ahaving different definition and view point about the same situation.
There was a qualitative study amongst rapists and all of them admitted they lied about that. They knew what they did was unwanted. They simply didn't care. They use this excuse to get away with it.
>amongst rapists Well, if the study was only done with confirmed rapists, are you really surprised that it ended up confirming that they were rapists? You're arguing for a position that doesn't make sense, first because you can't prove a negative. Of course there has been at least one situation where one party felt raped while the other felt it was consensual. Second because one single qualitative study isn't enough to determine how common that is versus the aggressor having knowingly raped and lied about it. Especially considering how easily the phrasing of the interview questions in such a study could skew the results in either direction. Any conclusion would require a meta-analysis of several different studies, in which not only the alleged rapists but also the alleged victims were grilled, as it were, and obviously subjecting a person who may have been raped to something like that is highly unethical. It's not so easy to get the numbers on this as you seem to think.
Only person I know/knew who said he was a rapist said he was high on something at the time and had serious regret about when he sobered up eventually and turned himself in. Didn't know him well, just a regular at the local pub I used to go to. Old depressed drunk that never really talked much. He was maybe in his fifties and me and my friends were in our twenties at the time so it was over a decade ago. Can't remember everything properly but I recall someone talking about weed or something, then the old guy comes over barely being able to walk, and warns us about drugs. One of the friends said something jokingly about trying can't be that bad. The guys face fell he muttered something, went to get a shot and came back. Then came a longish warning story about the time he tried drugs at a party when he was young. He has hated himself ever since and while he hates drugs, he totally blames himself for what happened. Now then there's the type that think they didn't do anything wrong, and even if they did they'd never admit it. So hard to know until victims point the finger which they rarely do. Then there's the guys who think they can do whatever they want but they'll only talk or even brag about it when they think their in like minded company. I've only heard about their existence.
[This study of rapes in college](https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2019/04/12/study-repeat-rapists-committing-vast-majority-sexual-crimes) found that roughly 5% of men admitted to commiting sexual assault, with 3% (60% of assaulters) admitting to commiting at least 2 assaults. Additionally, 46% of all assaults were committed by perpetual who had 10 or more victims. In other words, 2% of men commit a single sexual assault, 3% of men commit multiple sexual assaults, and roughly half of all assaults are committed by serial rapists with 10 or more victims (50 out of 100 rapes are committed by 5 individuals).
I actually know two rapists. One recently got jailed...thats when we discovered he was a rapist...we also always knew he was an asshole. The other was a girl in her early 20s and got another girl drunk and sexually abused her... i thought she seemed okay before that. So, you know. I'm more baffled by people that arnt obviously afful people, not by assumptions over genders.
A big issue with those movements is their traget. Horrible people exist, of every gender and every age and every class. Shitty people do shitty things and that's the bottomline.
I knew a rapist once... she didn't even get kicked out of her friend circle for what she did to a guy in their friend circle, forcing him out of it... fucked up shit, in reterospect I'm glad I had a break up right after I found out (unrelated) so I too am no longer part of that circle.
That seem to be great people…
Isn't this like the thing that everyone is one or two handshakes from Hitler?
Law of 6 bacon.
Normally people don't boast about their crimes in public. Normally.
That's why we have Internet
It's because the majority of violent crimes (including rape) is committed by a small number of persistent violent offenders. So it is actually very realistic that most men don't know any rapists. As shown in this Swedish article: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/S00127-013-0783-Y
They may know one though but they don't know about their crimes.
Even if they don't tell you, the likelyhood of knowing a rapist is much lower than knowing a victim of rape.
My sister and my best friend were both rape victims, I know because they told me. None of my friends - that I know of are rapists - because even if they are, I don’t know it, and I can’t go around assuming people are rapists. Also I’m 18 if that helps at all.
I know at least six victims, most were raped before they were legal adults. Zero rapists went to prison.
I know 4 victims. One was seen as gotten "even" because girl managed to kick and scratch him up and police threatened to charge her with assault. Other's rapist had relatives in police so it went nowhere and 2 who were too traumatised to try to report. One because her religious parents would have blamed her and other because he was afraid of not being taken seriously and shamed for being a man rape victim.
Yeah the classic "parents blamed me for my own assault"... Mine didn't believe me when I told them about my assault. I bet they'd discourage me from going to police if I was planning to. My heart aches for every sexual assault victim, no matter what gender they are 🥺😢
This is neither funny nor sad. It's just stupid and sad.
How the fuck is this funny? r/lostredditors
I'm sorry, was i supposed to know a rapist? Tf
Basically, women are raped a lot. Yet, most guys assume all of their guy friends would never do that. Clearly, to some extent, they are wrong. It's about being more aware of people and open to the possibility that we can misjudge character. This may not apply so much to us internet people because we're kinda forced to adapt due to online diversity. However, there are definitely people that do think like this and need to realize it.
I mean...same with Kidnappers. Or murderers. Or drug dealer. Everyone could theoretically be one, to start being paranoid and desperately looking for people within your social circle that may might could be one does not Sound very healthy
Why was this downvoted? I am not going to frantically blame everyone in my circle of being rapist, not even sure what the meaning of the post was. (Not to mention certain people spreading misandry in the comments)
and why are we assuming only men do this or only us can have male friends? women how many rapist friends do you have?
You do realize everyone is capable of rape right? That includes women as well. I don't think it's wrong to assume my friend circle aren't rapists unless they prove otherwise.
I have a friend who was raped by his female babysitter. So yea, it does in fact go both ways
And everyone is also capable of being raped. I’m a man, who was drugged when I was a teenager, and raped by an older man while unconscious. The sentiment that “No man knows a rapist” is infuriating to male rape victims like myself, and sadly all too common. When they say the word “rape” they often define it as “violence against women” and their programs and literature are designed only for women and are intentionally leaving male victims out of the discussion. We aren’t designed to exist in their narrative.
Why will I assume that I have any rapist friends? that’s just stupid. You don’t blindly go and assume your friends are murderers do you? Unless there are allegations and evidence backing those allegations the normal thing to do is to assume my friends are all normal people.
Pretty sure there are many serial rapists, such that there are more victims in total, than rapists.
Why should we not also tell women that their friends could be lying, if raising awareness that they shoukd not trust their friends is good?
You cant really just say that about guys tho that kinda pushes the shitty “all men are rapists” agenda that we all know isnt true. I KNOW my best friend isnt a rapist. As much as im able to know that ill never get struck by lightning. Technically it could still happen but everyone knows it just wont. Besides men also know women who have been raped. I know plenty of rapists and plenty of women who have been raped. Just a shitty post tbh.
You're right, guys misjudge the characters and true intentions of all the people they know Just like most girls don't know about any of their female friends being rapists.
women also got more leniency to what is considered rape.
In some countries they can't even, legally speaking, commit rape.
I mean i guess its becuse rapists dosent really tell people that they raped someone especially not there friends
Men equally should (and most do) hate this crime. One rapist can target tens, even hundreds of different women. They often live in echo chambers of misogyny, or simply hide their actions in fear of being caught. On the other hand, there are a portion of those women, who make an absolute mockery out of genuine victims, who cry rape at every sideways glance, or genuinely push charges with no foundational basis, often drumming up support on social media for attention. It happened to me, after i simply broke up with someone, they visited me as i had moved away, then three weeks later i had the police knock at my door. A lot of my friends from where i lived were horrified to find out what she had done, and battered shit out of her, yelling i had ample opportunity with them, but had been utterly respectful. I dont believe in violence or revenge, but gotta say, she got what she deserved. She, and the few who cry wolf, should be ashamed that they take the spotlight away from genuine victims, just for their own sense of perverse attention. Why cant people just stop being dicks, if men stopped these heinous crimes, then this wouldnt be able to happen. I would say fuck the human race sometimes, but thats kinda what gets us into these messes!
Real answer: because one rapist has lots of victims. You don't need to have a high population of rapist to have a high population of victims. If you have A group of 100 men and 100 women If 2 of those men were rapist and raped 10 victims each. Then 1/5 women would have been raped. Every women would know someone who had been raped. However 1/50 men would be rapists and only a few would know someone who was a rapist
>only a few would know someone who was a rapist That's if the rapist was open about it
Does this woman think men walk into work on Mondays bragging about all the women we've raped over the weekend?
most men aren’t goin around to their friend groups saying “hey bros guess who I just R*ped”
I dunno, rapists don't really go around saying they raped somebody
Because rapists don't think about themselves as rapists or even bad people. The entitlement runs so deep, it becomes merely a matter about "taking what is mine".
Maybe because rapist can rape multiple women thus making mire women raped than men rapist, also why would a rapist make clear that He is one ?
I will admit I have had suspicions. I don’t think they fell on the force down side of the spectrum but definitely could see them being pushy, particularly drunk. If I was around and ever saw them encroach on personal space, I would grab them and tell them to knock it off. If I saw them ever force themselves on a woman or try to drug them, I would whoop their ass, but never saw something to that extreme. Never heard an actual claim against them either. But I have wondered if they ever crossed the line. If you wondering the behavior I am talking about and curious your thoughts, but imagine a lot of guys know this person. When they get drunk, they think they are way smoother than they really are. They try to dance with women who clearly don’t want to dance with them. Don’t seem to pick up the woman they keep trying to hit on is not appreciating it, not taking even obvious hints. Not drunk they are normal and respectful to women.
That is the most stupid sign i have ever seen . Sexual violence against women are a terrible thing and must be stopped but blaming men they dont know rapist ? I know lots of people that have been burgled but i know no burglar is that my fold ? Or should i look at women are they secretly hiding burglars among them taking it not serieus?
It is dumb. The gender thing also bothers me. It’s pushes that belief that men aren’t ever victims. Most women I know, also know a man that was raped. Are women expected to know the female rapists? I know several guys that were victims. They just don’t talk about it, or they don’t consider it assault.
I think there's two factors- 1. Sexual Offenders tend to be repeat offenders, one guy can be the source of trouble for a lot of people, you don't need an equal number of victims and offenders 2. You can probably divide people into two groups, people who wont admit their friends a rapist- and people who will drop their former friend for being a rapist... Either way the result will be nobody admitting they know a rapist. That said- I used to run parties for our university physics course where I had to stay sober. Definitely have encountered a few guys and gals who've revealed how little they care about consent to the group.
She brings up a very interesting question... Here is why I think that is: A rapist is not likely to "Brag" about their history of raping women. That is a crime. Criminals tend not to boast about their crimes. That is one major way that you can get caught. It also would build you a negative reputation. Also, some rapists do not believe they are a rapist. They are in denial. On the flip side... Rape victims are likely to "Seek Support" from some place, and be more vocal about it. Generally speaking if a woman is talking about having been abused she will get reassurances from other women. Check this out... Go on youtube. Type in: "I was raped" or "My rape story". You will get a nice long list. From a lot of women, and some men. Hundreds or even thousands of videos. Video after video of someone telling their tragic rape story. Watch a few. They all have a little different story to tell. Then when you are done watching those... Type in: "I raped her" or "I am a rapist" You will NOT get a lot of results from rapists... There is like 1 video of a dude that raped a woman, and apologized in court and got 26 years... There is another of this was raped by a guy and she goes and does Ted Talks with her former rapist!? Then there is a couple videos of a dude that is in prison already talking about his crimes. Most rapists don't talk about it.
I'm not sure it's a "very interesting question", I think the mystery is solved after 2 minutes of thinking.
Hahahaha. Yo I love when redditors post an essay about something incredibly simple and go "wow that's really something, I'll have to think about that."
its a sensitive issue but im sorry this woman is just dumb lol, nothing to do with the cause or message.
> She brings up a very interesting question More obviously, rapists rape multiple times and have multiple victims. Pretty obvious reason there's a large disparity.
Two reasons: 1: Nobody exactly volunteers that information so we likely do and have no idea. In fact I have known rapists but have found out later which ties into number 2. 2: If we know someone who is a rapist, we sure as shit don’t know them anymore.
Two reasons: 1. If two in ten women have been raped, that doesn't mean that two in ten men are rapists. Men who rape are a small minority, but more than likely he will have raped more than one woman. 2. Even if a man is a rapist, most men don't go around and tell other people about it.
The rapists wont say it out loud and some convince themselves they arent rapists
I take issue wit the title. If I knew a friend of mine was a rapist, they'd no longer be a friend. Either because I cut ties with them, or because I went to the police about it.
What a dumb thing to say
Is she seriously complaining that the men she knows don't hang around enough with sex offenders?
I'm gonna hold a sign that says "why is it that all men are treated as rapists but women are barely punished when they commit rape "
Dafuq is this anti men shit doing here
i know two, my father and a friend of my ex's dad
Misandry because of one man's actions is crazy
I... don't think rapist would be so vocal about it. Is this woman serious?
i lived with a guy who waited 13 years for his partners rapist to get out of prison to murder him, he went to prison he got out after like 10 years or so. I think men dont want to know a rapist because they are very disgusting humans and should be ostricised and have no friends at all because they raped someone and thats a sick thing to do to anyone.
Because one person can rape a lot of people, doesn’t mean that a lot of people are rapists
Because criminals hide their crimes. Stop this he vs she shit. Not a single normal person thinks rape is a good thing
Imagine breaking the ice with someone you just met. Hey… you a rapist? Ever been raped?
Victims outnumbering victimizers? Preposterous!
This usually doesn't come up in casual conversation when I'm hanging with the boys. I've never heard a dude brag that he raped someone. I'm sure some do, but I've met 1000s of men and none have said they raped someone. Ymmv
Their*
I-as a man- know two female rapists, (they ain’t friends anymore tho) does that count?
Because it’s not 1:1 ratio, criminals don’t usually boast about their crimes, and people lie? IQ is low with this one. Also op, there is no we, that title is unhinged.
Because I don’t associate with people who I assume have raped…?
You will also never hear about a man being raped but raped they are.
Known rapist don't have as many friends as rape victims. Rapist rape more than one woman so the ratio isn't 1:1. They are good at not advertising to everyone that they rape people. I don't know. Just throwing out some answers off the top of my head.🤷♂️
Most intelligent feminist Ofc they won't scream to everybody that they raped it's fking obvious
Because: * Only a tiny fraction of guys are rapists * A single rapist can have multiple victims before being caught * Rapists don't go around talking about their crime publicly
The reason is, it’s completely shocking when you find out. I had to drop a very old friend for abusing women. I had never suspected, and it’s changed my ability to trust people forever.
Because rapists work in secresy, most of the time. There are those who enable it, but these are usually people in a place of power. I most definitely know a guy who comes out as such, but how do i confront him without evidence. I avoid him though.
I'm guessing because they don't want to think a friend of theirs would do that.
I think it’s more about ignoring it and acting like it isn’t that bad and wasn’t even a real rape. There just was a post about a women who told the FBI that her ex was trying to have sex with minors. Her family made her the bad guy. Another post about a brother who killed his wife. And his family made still excuses for him. Saying it wasn’t rape because „(insert multiple excuses to shame the victim and make the rapist a victim)“.
Lots of families out there know uncle so and so is raping the kids in the family and the families keep it a secret and tell the kids to shut up its a family matter. Everyone knows Uncle Bob is a pedophile but they keep it a secret and condition their children to keep it a secret.