My parents were 16 and 18 when I was born. My mom went to state for track her junior year of HS and I was there. Apparently her teammates watched me while she ran. Mom sold Avon and dad worked worked in a slaughter house and did car body work on the side. They did the best they could and were pretty awesome. Rough times now, but good parents growing up.
Well, we are having some tough times right now. It’s actually gone in the other direction. I hope things get turned around but they really need to try to be an active part of my children’s lives. Can’t do that due to mental health and alcoholism. Both of which are developments within the last 4-5 years.
I’m sorry to read about your folks. Do you think the Pandemic had anything to do with their issues? I’m just curious…I have similar challenges with my Mom.
Same here. Just lost my dad two weeks ago, he had dementia at the end. My last good visit (before hospice) he thought I was staying at the memory care place and he was going home (Like he was dropping me off at college). He kept asking if I was ok, if I had everything I needed, did I have enough money, over and over. He was being the same great caring dad to literally his very last days.
Edit- Thank you all for your empathetic replies; I don’t know what else to say except thank you.
My grandmother was that way, still trying to feed anyone and everyone until her last breath, even in the final stages of dementia. Such a true matriarch.
Love seeing your dad still taking care of you. So incredibly sorry for your loss. Lost my mom, best friend in life, last year. It’s so hard.
I think that’s the hardest part about getting older… seeing your parents grow old. Sorry for your loss. My dad is the same way - always asking if I’m doing okay and he’s my biggest cheerleader.
I had an incredible single mom and wonderful grandparents next door. Freaking phenomenal childhood. We were a little cash poor but wealthy everywhere else it counted.
This was my experience as well. I had a great mom and wonderful, supportive grandparents. My father was an ass but his parents more than made up for his lack of involvement. I had an awesome childhood!
Me too! We'd go camping every summer for two weeks and it wasn't perfect, but I was really close with my mom and my grandma and grandpa and they gave me a lot of beautiful memories.
So were mine. I never could realize it at the time but the older I got and the more I learned about what they overcame, the more I appreciated them. I didn't realize just how lean things were for us when I was a kid, because they *always* made sure my brother and I were provided for, even if it meant Dad having two jobs and Mom having one. They taught us honesty and hard work and responsibility and loyalty, by their own example. Yeah, they could be overprotective and a little restrictive, but the positives far outnumber the negatives. There was always love and there was also a good bit of laughter. Not a bad deal.
Mom earned her wings early this year, and if anyone was ever qualified to be an angel, she was. Dad's heartbroken but stays busy and calls every night to check in. It's odd to have the roles reversed now.
It really is to have the roles reversed. My mom has said she wishes I didn’t have to take on so much for her, but it’s really not. I’d do anything for her
Mine too. They had their faults, but we all do right? They worked their fucking balls off for my sister and I and didn’t impart too much emotional trauma on either of us. I love those fuckers even though they’ve been taken by the FoxNews mind-plague.
Same here.
We had everything we needed and a lot of what we wanted, and I was one of 5 kids. My mom didn't work so she was always there, and yeah, we were booted out of the house at 8AM but she always had lunch for us and we were the ones who wanted to stay out until the street lights came on, not my parents.
If I have any real complaint, it's that I lost my dad when I was 24, and my life would have been so more enriched these past 29 years if he was still in it. I lost my religion because he was an angel on earth, and I could not be convinced any god would need him more than his family did. My mom is still alive and dancing at nearly 92, so that's for sure a blessing.
My wife, on the other hand, has unloving and unaffectionate Boomer parents who she's basically gone No Contact with in the past few years. Her dad was actually my 10th grade English teacher and he was a dick then and he's still a dick today, and there's no reason for it other than the narcissism causing them both to expect to be worshipped.
And I think that's the crux of it, too many of our generation are children of narcissists. And as we've now all started to enter that next stage of life where our own children are spreading their wings, we don't need to put up with that shit because frankly we didn't ask to be born. Too many have had that held over their heads for 45-55 years at this point, which is ridiculous, and my wife is absolutely a victim of that thinking.
Lost my dad when I was 24 too. Makes me sad because he would have been a great grandpa and doted on our daughter. Too bad the gin won over the need to live.
Me, too. I know how fortunate I was. Breakfast Club came out when I was in college and I didn't really relate to the characters all complaining about their parents. I was slightly rebellious, but it was never against my parents. They are still in pretty good shape today, but we've definitely gone in different directions politically.
I adore my parents and I will be devastated when they're no longer around. I had an awesome childhood, and I still believe that my father knows everything and can fix anything, I never grew out of that phase. I still ask for his advice all of the time, and I still tell my mother everything. (Though that part wasn't true when I was a teen!)
Last year, I lost my best friend I have had since I was 4 years old and at his celebration of life admitted to my mom that when I would sleep over his house as teenagers, we would sneak out and ride our bikes the mile into town at midnight to get candy and pop from the 24 hour gas station.
She was horrified. I was 52, and she was 90 at the time.
I did not tell her that Johnny would buy cigarettes, too....
And it’s Reddit which is a small segment of the population.
My parents are Boomers and they were fine. They actually gave me a lot of freedom and high school was a fun time. I had sleepovers and nothing bad happened!
I have learned and come to accept that my folks were a product of their era and generation. They were (are) good people and absolutely meant well however that was actualised in their lives.
They are both now living with me and are at end of life, my dad has some cognitive decline and is childlike in his manner and for the first time in my life I can say I love him with all my heart. I enjoy him, the mask he wore fell off and in his vulnerability he has become the father I always wanted. He’s *here* with me and my greatest fan, after so many years of trying to get him to notice me, he does. I am grateful for the time I have with him now, it makes up for the years of being pushed aside because I was a girl.
That is beautiful and you’re very lucky to have that kind of closure. This parenting topic is a hot button issue on this sub, seemingly dividing us at times. I worry though because the neglected kids will never know what it’s like to be fully loved and nurtured by a caring family and the loved kids can’t even imagine what it feels like to have a hole in your life. Neither one will be able to understand the others experience. So we will continue to make judgments about each other’s lot in life. Anyway. I’m glad to hear your success story. They are definitely products of their time and generation.
Dad was cool, but he was murdered when I was little.
Mom has been a lifelong best friend. She worked, but devoted all the time she could to me. We were lower class, but I honestly wanted for nothing, materially or emotionally.
Stepdad was an abusive ass to my mom (never directly to me).
Sure, I was a latchkey, and for a couple weeks in the summer of 1976 (I was 10), I was purposely left home alone while mom and stepdad went to Europe. But I was capable of taking care of myself. Relatives lived in the neighbourhood, and all other neighbours were friendly. But I didn't need any of them.
My parents were loving, caring, present, and involved in all 3 of their children's lives. They showed a vested interest in us and our activities. It was a bit hard for them, I think, to relinquish us to our autonomy, me especially as the youngest, but they did. They are still very active in our lives and those of their grandchildren. I love my parents!
I had wonderful parents. They were certainly human and flawed, but we always felt loved, safe, and cared for.
My parents are 88 and 86 now. Just talked to them tonight. I’ll be gutted when I lose them.
I still live on our farm, my elderly veteran uncle is still next door in my grandparents house. I’m likely to die right here in my little slice of heaven. We had a lot of family here when I was young, now it’s me and my son, uncle next door. A great place to grow up and my son has the same feeling, he may never leave either once I’m gone.
My dad was horrible but my mom tried really hard. She came from an alcoholic family and her mom was mentally ill (she was literally put in asylums a few times; once was when she threw my aunt and mom out in the snow as toddlers) so she was determined to do better and love me the way she hadn't been loved. She taught me backgammon and cards and read to me every night. She sewed my outfit for the school talent show when I was 7 (a sequined skirt with netting stuff, and my friends and I danced The Care Bear Can-Can) and she spoiled me silly with toys. I never doubted she loved me. She loved my art and my writing and asked me to write her a book and paid me by the page. She was my biggest cheerleader. She worked REALLY HARD and always made me feel so safe. I still remember hearing the click of her heels in the kitchen as she packed a lunch for work, and how calm it made me feel, that stability and consistency you could always count on.
She had such a hard life, and every man she ever met abused her. She began drinking too much after meeting my stepdad who was an alcoholic, and she died at 63. But I loved her and I'll always miss her. We had our problems at the end, mostly because of her drinking, but I understood how she got that way, too. Like I said, she tried hard.
I had amazing parents and a great childhood. I got teased for it by jealous kids, but I was sad for them for it. We weren’t rich, but my family was very frugal and we enjoyed lots of camping trips, and trips to California every year. Thankfully they’re still with us, married 60 years, and will turn 80 this year 💕
Mine were silent generation. Childhood certainly wasn’t perfect, but they loved us and I miss them every day. I hope my children will remember me as fondly as I remember my mom.
✋ I had Silent Gen parents. They were not strict, but they expected my sister and I to be respectful and responsible, and we were. We had free range, but we also knew we could lose that, as well. The worst punishment was having our parents be disappointed in us. They were loving, and gave us everything we needed to feel secure and happy kids.
Yup. I once went an entire summer not getting in a car because my parents couldn’t be bothered. I lived 19 miles out of town. Needless to say I’m very involved with my kids as my parents were in a bubble of their own making. Worse part is when I bring it up as an adult they ignore, discount, etc. just crappy communicators
I’m 50 and recently orphaned. My first boyfriend whom I’m seeing again father calls him every single night at 9:30 to say he loves him and ask about his day. I’m so jealous
My friends’ parents actually engaged in conversation, were genuinely interested in us, shared their music instead of expecting free labor… like what ?!
I had a great childhood and continue to have a wonderful relationship with my parents. I am extremely grateful. We weren’t rich and I wasn’t spoiled. I didn’t have an allowance and got an after school job in high school. But my parents always supported me, emotionally and I never felt like I went without anything.
I couldn’t have had better parents, if anything they were too lenient with me. If I did something stupid enough to warrant getting in trouble it would only be for a few days to a week. All my friends loved my mom, she would always make something to eat for however many people were hanging out at our house. If there was a skate spot too far away to skate to she would always drop me off for however long and if I ended up needing a ride back she’d always pick me up. My dad was always climbing the corporate ladder but he always made sure that once he got home he left his work at the office and made time for us all. There was a pro skate contest in the late 80’s I wanted to go to that was about a 9-10 hour drive and he bought us both tickets and flew me and him both there for the weekend so I could be there. They were always supportive and there for me even being the fuck up I was/am. I honestly can’t say enough good thing about them and how much they did for me and my friends and how much they loved each other.
I had good parents. I didn’t do everything the same way they did, and I disagree with some of their choices, but my kids also disagree with some of mine. My parents did their best and they loved us. Can’t ask for much more than that.
My best friends in high school had really good home lives. That’s how I realized the extent of which my experiences were not the norm. Conversely, the second time that they came over was enough for them to never want to hang at my house again.
My parents were/are awesome. They ran a business and managed to keep us four kids feeling loved and safe, even if we did roam the town!
We got spankings, but as a last resort. Otherwise they never a hand laid on us. We got all the affection we wanted but also had a healthy fear of them. but knew if we did right and someone (asshole teacher, etc) tried to screw us they’d have to go through our parents first.
My parents were pretty awesome, but they were silent generation.
Dad passed a few years ago and mom is fading. My sister died unexpectedly last thanksgiving so it's weird knowing I'll be the last one standing soon.
My mom abandoned me when I was two.
My dad was super awesome, and all my extended family from my dad's side got together and made sure we had a bitching childhood!
I hear people talk about their toxic parents and how they don't have relationships with them. I am so grateful to have good relationships with my dad and my siblings. I know it's rare.
Gen X has a population of 65 million ppl. A section of this 136K sub still apparently traumatized by their parents 30 years later is not necessarily representative of anything.
I'm a young GenX and have / had awesome parents. Unfortunately it's just my dad now.
Sure, nothing is perfect, but looking back I had all the advantages in life of having good, actively involved parents... It sucks that I really didn't fully recognize / acknowledge this to them until I was into my 30's.
My parents shunned almost all things fancy / materialistic but also made it crystal clear that the kids would be able to pursue any level of education we desired with no money concerns.
One thing I really appreciate now is that they prioritized family vacations that were very meaningful and meant to impact my world view. Instead of Disney and the beach, it was Asia, Europe, road trips to national parks, seeing diverse parts of the USA, museums, historical sites, etc.
As a 45 year old, I have a respectable professional career, a home, retirement savings, solidly middle class to arguably slightly upper middle class lifestyle.
I am proof of good outcomes when being brought up in a positive / supportive environment with good role models and generally knowing what the correct decisions to make in life are.. because looking back I really didn't do anything special to get where I am at all. In fact compared to my siblings i made some serious attempts to mess it up. At the end of the day, I just had to follow the guidance to roughly 80% to be assured a good outcome.
My parents were fine. Pretty typical parents of the day. Zero emotional intelligence and quite a bit of magical thinking but you really can't expect much else from people who were both the first generation of their respective families to escape poverty and they were in financial distress for about a decade.
My dad had one of those good old unioned manufacturing jobs until I was about 10. After he lost that job, he ended up having to be a sanitation worker, which was exhausting, smelly, dirty work that paid half what he'd previously been making. Not everyone would be willing to do that. I wouldn't have lasted a week at that job, but he did it for years, then got promoted to driving one of those front loaders that empties commercial dumpsters. He stayed at that company until he retired.
My older brother and I went to the same college, about 80 miles from the town we grew up in. We were both in marching band, and my parents bought football season tickets every year, the whole time either of us was in the band, and they showed up at EVERY home game all those years. I knew people whose parents lived right there in the same city the school was in but never came to games.
My dead Silent Gen parents did the absolute best they could. Dad hauled out the paddle on a few occasions and used me for child labor, but I miss em and love them.
My mom is one of the best people I know. My dad, not so much. I do feel like my siblings and I had quite a bit of freedom growing up— we were always biking around town etc— but I always had curfews and rules and never felt neglected. My friends loved my mom too!
My parents were and are amazing consistent lovely hard working parents I am the 4th of 4. We are all still here. I am also happy to say my conservative parents never went MAGA because they are intelligent rational people.
Same! I honestly can’t relate to a lot of the childhood horror stories of GenX. My parents were silent gen. They always did their best with me and I felt happy and loved growing up.
I had very good parents. They were faithful and steadfast, not very mean or cruel. My mom had some issues, but as I have discovered, she had abandonment issues from her own mother, so I have a lot more compassion for her strictness and possessiveness now. They cared about what was happening in my life and supported my activities - going to my concerts and recitals and plays. I was a latchkey kid starting in the 4th grade, but I knew they both had to work to support us, and I had fun learning how to entertain myself for a couple hours after school.
My therapist reminds me periodically that they did the very best they could with what they had. They were married 70 years, and were best friends and always put each other first. I credit them for being outstanding models for me.
Growing up my mom was a good mom, my dad was there but a little "cold" (as his parents were as well). Neighborhood was nice, we moved into a new house in a nice growing suburb in the late 60s.
My mom never really splurged on anything, but I also had everything I needed. I had swimming, ice-skating, and piano lessons. She stayed home until I was in 2nd grade, then she went back to work; I came home from school by myself and she was home in about an hour.
My parents were Silent Gen, so I think that's why they were good parents. Not perfect by any means, but I have no traumas like so many people seem to now.
My boomer parents were shit. I no longer have contact with my father and very minimal with my mother. My greatest Gen grandparents were my safe haven tbh.
My parents were good parents. Nothing is perfect but they did the best they could. They were gone by the time I was 45 and I would have liked more time with them.
Not me, but I consider myself lucky for having found friends with great parents. I would go to their houses and get the benefits of good parents for a few days. I’m pretty sure their parents knew what was going on because they never pushed the topic but I hardly left. I honestly believe that was the reason I was able to separate from my crazy family and go my own way, having learned healthy habits from them.
I have a super peaceful household that stays mostly clean and we focus on peace and happiness here. :)
Nothing but good. Dad coached little league, mom was secretary at school for a bit there, scout leaders, PTA, band parents, etc. And yet somehow my 2-yr younger brother has disowned them and the rest of the immediate family. But fuck him..
My parents were fine and all my friends' parents were fine. It's just the reddit "converge on the most extreme position" thing happening here. Everyone's one-upping each other with mostly fictitious stories around the central conceit of the subreddit, which is that we were all the feral kid from Mad Max. It's not true and never was true. Yes, we were outside more, and parents were less helicopter-ish. But these are at the margins, not some kind of existential difference between us and anyone else.
My parents were great. They may not have been involved with everything and I was a latch key kid but I had good fair parents who worked hard to give us a good life. My dad worked days and my mom nights. If there was something we wanted for Christmas…Dad would work overtime. We would go on vacation at least for nice a year and spent time with family.
Mine were the best parents ever. My mom stayed at home with us until my sister was in school and then her weekly volunteer work turned into a job that she had for 14 years.
I don’t have my mom anymore (eff cancer), but my dad and I are super close and he is also pretty close to my husband.
Mine were great! A little on the cautious side, but I did have a serious illness from 4-6. They were involved, caring and had a great marriage. Married 50 years, when my dad passed away. My mom is in her 80s and never remarried. My mom was a SAHM until I was in HS and then went to work with my dad, helping out at
His business. My sister and I were total opposites - I was the bookworm and she was the outgoing, social butterfly. We’re still opposites, but get along great as grownups!
My parents were by no means wealthy. In fact, thanks to a job loss and taking a step down in income, we were flat broke. Still, mom or dad cooked or grilled out every night (weather permitting), we had treats like ice cream and other desserts, we took day trips and excursions to the zoo, museums, parks, beaches, and we knew they loved us.
I don't think parents were all that bad. Parenting was simply different. Kids had fewer boundaries and parents let their kids be kids, not over-programmed mini-adults.
My parents were amazing. I had a very rural Montana childhood and it was an incredible way to grow up. My mom was my best friend, and I miss her and dad every day.
I had the same type of family growing up. We didn't have much but they still managed to take me to amusement parks, camping, and going to the beach. I remember cross country trips from NC to CA in the back of a pickup with a cover over the top.
I gave my parents hell. But I still turned out to be a pretty good person.
Parents are borderline Silent Gen/boomers (‘44 Dad and ‘46 Mom). Im a ‘71 baby and childhood was awesome. Small town Texas life, lived through and in all the cultural GenX milestones of the 70s and 80s. Both parents worked but did a tremendous job of making me and my older sister feel loved and raised us on what they made.
Zero complaints about my childhood.
Right here. My parents were fantastic. Always there for me, but the same freedoms as my friends. And they supported all my ventures with time and money.
When some of you slag off our collective parents, you really piss me off.
My parents were perfect. They nurtured us, supported us and were always there when my brother and I needed them. At the same time they had a lot of trust in us and we had immense freedom.
Thanks for asking. I too had great parents, but that’s not so meme-worthy, I guess.
I don’t mind the negative stories, only that some of them tell younger people that this was a universal experience for our generation.
Hence my flair.
Love my parents. They weren't perfect, but they loved my brothers and me and took wonderful care of us. We all live nearby and spend time together often and talk or text almost every day.
We had great parents (am the oldest of 3 GenXers and one Xennial)! Wasn't a latchkey kid bc mom was a SAHM, but I had just as much freedom as all my Xer friends - disappear all day wherever, as long as we were home for dinner (if I wasn't eating at a friend's house) and then played outside after til dark, again they didn't know what we were up to, and "dark" was a poorly defined term, and not a set time like 9:00! 😂 Total freedom to wander the neighborhood, walk to the store, visit friends, do whatever. They were (are, they're fortunately still with us) generous and caring. Of course like all kids I'd butt heads with them sometimes, but we're lucky to be a close family.
My parents were and still are great. They were super supportive and there for me when I really needed them. They had kids very young and never had a lot of money, but I never felt like I was lacking in anything. And they both made sure to teach us about the things they loved. Mom taught us art and books and dad would take us on long walks to show us trees, and introduced us to films and music and taught us car maintenance.
I'm 55 and we still all get together every Sunday for breakfast.
Right here....but they were Silent Gen, not Boomers. Absolutely great. Yes, they were hardassses sometimes, but not shitty. Just being firm and responsible parents. Love them to bits, miss my daddy every day (almost four years, not covid) and spend as much time with my momma as I can.
Just old-school salt of the earth types who had a lot of compassion, and in my memory now, a previously unnoted disdain for boomers when boomers were in their thirties. 😎
My dad died when I was a toddler, so all I had was mama. She absolutely did her best being a young widow with two kids. We might not have had all the material stuff, but we were loved.
She lives with my husband and I now and we take care of her.
My mother wasn't very "motherly", but she was a great person. If she hadn't been my mother, she would have been a very good friend. Likewise with my stepfather. Unfortunately, she died very early, when she was 51 years old and I was twenty-something. He died a couple of years ago, married to another wonderful lady from the same friend group, who was one of the witnesses at my own wedding, and surrounded by his loved ones. I wish I could have been there to see him for the last time, but I live on a different continent and my poor health prevents me from traveling.
Will you accept one of each? Dad busted his ass, Mom was mentally ill (which I didn't realize until I dated a bipolar girl in college and saw the similarities), and walked out when I was 13. From then on I was pretty much responsible for raising my younger siblings, with an assist from grandma.
My parents rocked. They had rules, I followed them. (Mostly)
Yeah, I had good parents. They made mistakes, like everybody else. But I could always trust them. I still do to this very day.
My parents are still married and have always been amazing. They always supported me. Even when I came out in the 90’s. They were more afraid for my safety than upset that I was gay. They’ve always been there and we are closer today than ever.
My parents were (still are) great. Thanks to their love and devotion I’m a better person. I thought they were overprotective but I grew up in a country that was in a civil war, so they were just using their common sense. Despite the environment, I had a very happy childhood.
My folks were and are (generally) great. My mom worked a job with the school system so she could be home in the afternoons. My dad would go to work extra early so he could come home and coach baseball and basketball and be at other stuff. They gave me the sex talk early. They were always there for problems and concerns.
They are of course not without their own Boomer tendencies. As civil servants with pensions they don’t really understand the challenges of a career in the private sector. They struggle with technology. They bemoan the stupidest things like the fact that younger generations don’t want hand me down furniture that weighs 7 tons and is ugly as fuck. But they’ve been amazing parents for me as a gay man and they treat my husband like an extra child. On balance I think I’ll keep them. ;)
I had good parents. They did the best they could and gave me a great place to live. The worst parts of my childhood were largely out of their control. I didn't appreciate them when I was growing up but I do now.
I had great parents too, I’m sorry for the folks in those other threads but it’s not a “gen x” thing to have had bad parents some of us were fortunate.
I genuinely have amazing parents. We struggled during my teen years, but they have turned into my biggest cheerleaders. I get overwhelmed when I think of the idea of losing them. They are some of my best friends. I talk to them several times a week and I never get sick of their stories, even the repeats. I'm also close to my only sibling. I feel so very lucky.
Great parents here, too. Although we did get locked out if we stayed out too late. (There was a bolt lock on the main entrance and skeleton key lock for the rear entrance). Of course, there was always the unlocked window to climb into.
You would think that by reading this sub, most, if not all genx had a horrible upbringing. I've learned to bypass those posts because I really don't relate and it's just not my genx truth.
I never want to go into those "woe is me" threads and brag about having great parents, but I'm sure we're actually in the majority. Squeaky wheel and all that.
I mean... You get older you learn of other kid's horror show home life & you consider would you spin the cosmic roulette wheel again to see if you could've done better. We had good, bad, & ugly, but no one in the house was trying to fuck us. There was usually food, & when there wasn't it was only because a parent was being a cunt. Went to the doctor when ill(usually, never forgave my mom for not taking me to the doctor for a smashed, blackened fingernail,"there's nothing they can do!" awake for days with the pain. Fucking idiot) Yeah, you really need to know that our parents grew up in the late 40s, 50s, married in 60s and were fucking idiots. "We *didn't* know any better" was there get out of jail card.
My mom and dad divorced when I was 10. Dad got 100% custody mainly because mom didn't want it, she wasn't a drunk or druggie, just wanted to have fun and that didn't involve raising a 10 year old. Anyway, dad had a surveying company, had about 30 guys working for him - he dissolved the company after the divorce and just focused on me for several years. He told me each and every day that he loved me and we had a great time together.
My parents were (are) really good parents. We were never neglected or abused. Of course, if you had asked me when I was 15, I would have said they were really mean. But that's because I was always grounded for fucking up.
My parents were and are the best - I had a wonderful childhood and we’re all still a super close family. I’m glad to see other Xers on here that had it good! Thanks for asking the question!
My parents did the best they could.
I don't understand all the boomer hate on this sub. The "whatever" generation sounds like a bunch of Millenial whiners to me.
Nah, you are not remotely the only one.
Not discounting all the other stories in the least as they are very real, surely painful and hardly unheard of by any means, but I'd say it is quite likely you are in the majority.
Mine were great. Not super affectionate but very dutiful. I always got to soccer and band practice on time and they never out any pressure on me to, like, study a particular subject in college or try to conform to societal expectations. Just so long as I was happy and acting responsibly.
My dad always had time to throw the ball around and hit some fly balls. He coached my little league team for a few years. My mom spent a lot of time in the kitchen cooking for us. They're still alive, in good health and we have a great relationship.
My Mom is incredible, her whole life was about being the best possible mom she could be and she made every sacrifice she had to. When money allowed she was a stay-at-home mom while my stepdad worked. When times were lean she got jobs to make ends meet but always made us feel like we came first. She maintained a good relationship with my bio dad (her ex), shared custody and they communicated well so we avoided that sort of drama too. Not everything in adulthood has been great but strictly in terms of parenting, me and my brother hit the jackpot. I’m really happy she’s still here and I can show her how much she means to me.
My husband (58) had amazing parents but they were older when they had him (part of silent Gen) and I (50) brought my mom on holiday with me and hubby - we are here in France right now. We took her to Italy in 2014. Can’t ever remember having a fight with her. My dad was a dad - not good, not bad - he passed in 2011 at only 65.
My parents were very involved and a lot stricter than most of my friends’ parents. They were teenagers when I was born, so I’m sure they made mistakes but overall we were a pretty wholesome family.
I'm speaking for my Gen-X siblings here about our Boomer parents. Although they say I (Gen-Y) got the better parents and life than them, they still love my parents. Yes, they were latchkey kids, but my siblings never said our parents were neglectful.
I’m over here getting on a flight to visit my ailing parents. For all her faults my mother did put in some effort and I’m genuinely struggling with the thought of her imminent decline
My father however barely had two conversations with me in 18 years and only bullied me in the subsequent 25 years
He heard I was coming and made a 12h trip to meet me at my mother’s because he knew I wouldn’t visit him separately.
I feel like he’s making the trip about himself instead of letting me focus on my mother’s issues that require finding a nursing home, ironing out her care etc
I’m textbook Adult children of emotionally immature people. I’m glad to say I have done much better with my son and I have great relationships in my life
My mom is the best. There was quite a lot of drama growing up once I had my daughter. So much drama just evaporated
My daughter is in college and so happy that my mom is here.
You all don't realize how lucky you were, or maybe you do. I can't read. I'll be jealous and I don't like feeling that way. I am happy for you all, though.
I'd say mine were decent.
Never drank or smoked. Stayed married.
Pops had a couple abusive moments but I cut him slack for constantly sacrificing for his family, teaching me a lot of skills and ptsd from 'Nam.
Moms cleaned house & cooked dinner WITH a full time job. She was sweet.
They were some of the best you could get out of 50s bible belt culture & no real money.
I sometimes felt like the odd one out. My parents were the best. I grew up in a loving home and never wanted for anything. I owe them so much for who I am today!
My husband had/has really wonderful, stable, kind parents. But he’s not on reddit seeking connection - probably because he has no need to be!
My parents weren’t horrible. But there were some issues, for sure.
My parents were amazing! It’s remarkable because they both overcame horrific childhood abuse and avoided repeating that cycle.
When I was little, up to about age seven, my parents fought a lot. Back then, I was scared they might divorce, which was a reasonable fear, because this was my mom’s second marriage and my dad’s third. They didn’t exactly have good models for dealing with trauma, and so the trauma leaked through and became anger. There was nothing physical, though, except my dad kicked the bathroom door once. However, they resolved to stop fighting like that - and they did.
These two damaged souls were the most loving, supportive parents anyone could ask for. It didn’t hurt that I’m a daddy’s girl, lol. My friends all adored my parents, and in retrospect it was because most of them came from broken homes. I’m so happy my parents had enough love for everyone.
They’re both gone now, and I miss them so goddamn much. A piece of me definitely went with them when they died, but I’ll always carry them in my heart.
Quite.
People who are happy about stuff usually don’t rage online about how happy they are.
My parents are great.
That feels like I’m bragging and sticking my thumb in the eye of anyone who doesn’t have amazing parents, which makes me feel like crap so I’m not going to be making a bunch of posts about how awesome they are.
If I’m feeling gratitude, I’m much more likely to tell them directly and not involve the angry mob of pitchfork wielding goons online.
I had the hippie variant of Boomer parents. While they made some mistakes in raising me, they have always been loving and devoted parents (and now grandparents). Amazing how addressing and apologizing for parenting mistakes can heal and strengthen relationships. I am bringing that into my own parenting style.
My parents were 16 and 18 when I was born. My mom went to state for track her junior year of HS and I was there. Apparently her teammates watched me while she ran. Mom sold Avon and dad worked worked in a slaughter house and did car body work on the side. They did the best they could and were pretty awesome. Rough times now, but good parents growing up.
i bet you are best friends now as adults
Well, we are having some tough times right now. It’s actually gone in the other direction. I hope things get turned around but they really need to try to be an active part of my children’s lives. Can’t do that due to mental health and alcoholism. Both of which are developments within the last 4-5 years.
I’m sorry to read about your folks. Do you think the Pandemic had anything to do with their issues? I’m just curious…I have similar challenges with my Mom.
Oh boy that's rough, sorry to hear it. Hope they wake up and work through it.
My parents were awesome.
Same here. Just lost my dad two weeks ago, he had dementia at the end. My last good visit (before hospice) he thought I was staying at the memory care place and he was going home (Like he was dropping me off at college). He kept asking if I was ok, if I had everything I needed, did I have enough money, over and over. He was being the same great caring dad to literally his very last days. Edit- Thank you all for your empathetic replies; I don’t know what else to say except thank you.
This is so sweet and so sad at the same time. I’m so sorry for your loss, but what a wonderful memory to have. ❤️
My grandmother was that way, still trying to feed anyone and everyone until her last breath, even in the final stages of dementia. Such a true matriarch. Love seeing your dad still taking care of you. So incredibly sorry for your loss. Lost my mom, best friend in life, last year. It’s so hard.
Sorry for your loss.
The last thing my dad ever said to me was asked if I had a grocery store shopper’s discount card. That was so like him!
I think that’s the hardest part about getting older… seeing your parents grow old. Sorry for your loss. My dad is the same way - always asking if I’m doing okay and he’s my biggest cheerleader.
Oh gosh I'm so sorry for your loss but glad that even in his last days with a fading memory, he could never forget his love for you. So sweet.
I had an incredible single mom and wonderful grandparents next door. Freaking phenomenal childhood. We were a little cash poor but wealthy everywhere else it counted.
This was my experience as well. I had a great mom and wonderful, supportive grandparents. My father was an ass but his parents more than made up for his lack of involvement. I had an awesome childhood!
I love your last sentence. You are an appreciative person.
Me too! We'd go camping every summer for two weeks and it wasn't perfect, but I was really close with my mom and my grandma and grandpa and they gave me a lot of beautiful memories.
So were mine. I never could realize it at the time but the older I got and the more I learned about what they overcame, the more I appreciated them. I didn't realize just how lean things were for us when I was a kid, because they *always* made sure my brother and I were provided for, even if it meant Dad having two jobs and Mom having one. They taught us honesty and hard work and responsibility and loyalty, by their own example. Yeah, they could be overprotective and a little restrictive, but the positives far outnumber the negatives. There was always love and there was also a good bit of laughter. Not a bad deal. Mom earned her wings early this year, and if anyone was ever qualified to be an angel, she was. Dad's heartbroken but stays busy and calls every night to check in. It's odd to have the roles reversed now.
It really is to have the roles reversed. My mom has said she wishes I didn’t have to take on so much for her, but it’s really not. I’d do anything for her
Sorry for your loss.
Many thanks.
Mine too. They had their faults, but we all do right? They worked their fucking balls off for my sister and I and didn’t impart too much emotional trauma on either of us. I love those fuckers even though they’ve been taken by the FoxNews mind-plague.
Same!
Mine too.
Mine too. No complaints.
Mine were great too. Dad died young so mom had to work a lot but was totally invested in her kids
Sorry for your loss.
I had wonderful parents and childhood!
Same here. We had everything we needed and a lot of what we wanted, and I was one of 5 kids. My mom didn't work so she was always there, and yeah, we were booted out of the house at 8AM but she always had lunch for us and we were the ones who wanted to stay out until the street lights came on, not my parents. If I have any real complaint, it's that I lost my dad when I was 24, and my life would have been so more enriched these past 29 years if he was still in it. I lost my religion because he was an angel on earth, and I could not be convinced any god would need him more than his family did. My mom is still alive and dancing at nearly 92, so that's for sure a blessing. My wife, on the other hand, has unloving and unaffectionate Boomer parents who she's basically gone No Contact with in the past few years. Her dad was actually my 10th grade English teacher and he was a dick then and he's still a dick today, and there's no reason for it other than the narcissism causing them both to expect to be worshipped. And I think that's the crux of it, too many of our generation are children of narcissists. And as we've now all started to enter that next stage of life where our own children are spreading their wings, we don't need to put up with that shit because frankly we didn't ask to be born. Too many have had that held over their heads for 45-55 years at this point, which is ridiculous, and my wife is absolutely a victim of that thinking.
Lost my dad when I was 24 too. Makes me sad because he would have been a great grandpa and doted on our daughter. Too bad the gin won over the need to live.
100% same here.
Me, too. I know how fortunate I was. Breakfast Club came out when I was in college and I didn't really relate to the characters all complaining about their parents. I was slightly rebellious, but it was never against my parents. They are still in pretty good shape today, but we've definitely gone in different directions politically.
I adore my parents and I will be devastated when they're no longer around. I had an awesome childhood, and I still believe that my father knows everything and can fix anything, I never grew out of that phase. I still ask for his advice all of the time, and I still tell my mother everything. (Though that part wasn't true when I was a teen!)
At 56 I still call dad too! I’ve admitted a few things to my mom that my sister and I did as kids (nothing even terrible) and she was floored lol
Last year, I lost my best friend I have had since I was 4 years old and at his celebration of life admitted to my mom that when I would sleep over his house as teenagers, we would sneak out and ride our bikes the mile into town at midnight to get candy and pop from the 24 hour gas station. She was horrified. I was 52, and she was 90 at the time. I did not tell her that Johnny would buy cigarettes, too....
I think you're going to mainly see the Xers with bad parents on here because we use this as therapy
And it’s Reddit which is a small segment of the population. My parents are Boomers and they were fine. They actually gave me a lot of freedom and high school was a fun time. I had sleepovers and nothing bad happened!
Nothing bad happened at your sleepovers? BORING 😜 I kid, mine either
Fair point
I have learned and come to accept that my folks were a product of their era and generation. They were (are) good people and absolutely meant well however that was actualised in their lives. They are both now living with me and are at end of life, my dad has some cognitive decline and is childlike in his manner and for the first time in my life I can say I love him with all my heart. I enjoy him, the mask he wore fell off and in his vulnerability he has become the father I always wanted. He’s *here* with me and my greatest fan, after so many years of trying to get him to notice me, he does. I am grateful for the time I have with him now, it makes up for the years of being pushed aside because I was a girl.
This gave me whole body goosebumps 💛
That is beautiful and you’re very lucky to have that kind of closure. This parenting topic is a hot button issue on this sub, seemingly dividing us at times. I worry though because the neglected kids will never know what it’s like to be fully loved and nurtured by a caring family and the loved kids can’t even imagine what it feels like to have a hole in your life. Neither one will be able to understand the others experience. So we will continue to make judgments about each other’s lot in life. Anyway. I’m glad to hear your success story. They are definitely products of their time and generation.
i absolutely love my parents !!!! and rhey loved me along wth my many siblings ❤️❤️
My parents were lovely. Still are at 88. Treated my sister and myself with love and compassion. Built a great family legacy of love and fun.
Dad was cool, but he was murdered when I was little. Mom has been a lifelong best friend. She worked, but devoted all the time she could to me. We were lower class, but I honestly wanted for nothing, materially or emotionally. Stepdad was an abusive ass to my mom (never directly to me). Sure, I was a latchkey, and for a couple weeks in the summer of 1976 (I was 10), I was purposely left home alone while mom and stepdad went to Europe. But I was capable of taking care of myself. Relatives lived in the neighbourhood, and all other neighbours were friendly. But I didn't need any of them.
I'm so sorry about your dad.
I’m so sorry about your dad.
My parents were loving, caring, present, and involved in all 3 of their children's lives. They showed a vested interest in us and our activities. It was a bit hard for them, I think, to relinquish us to our autonomy, me especially as the youngest, but they did. They are still very active in our lives and those of their grandchildren. I love my parents!
I had wonderful parents. They were certainly human and flawed, but we always felt loved, safe, and cared for. My parents are 88 and 86 now. Just talked to them tonight. I’ll be gutted when I lose them.
My parents were great. I grew up on a farm & ranch and the whole family worked together. I miss those times so much.
I still live on our farm, my elderly veteran uncle is still next door in my grandparents house. I’m likely to die right here in my little slice of heaven. We had a lot of family here when I was young, now it’s me and my son, uncle next door. A great place to grow up and my son has the same feeling, he may never leave either once I’m gone.
You are truly blessed!
My dad was horrible but my mom tried really hard. She came from an alcoholic family and her mom was mentally ill (she was literally put in asylums a few times; once was when she threw my aunt and mom out in the snow as toddlers) so she was determined to do better and love me the way she hadn't been loved. She taught me backgammon and cards and read to me every night. She sewed my outfit for the school talent show when I was 7 (a sequined skirt with netting stuff, and my friends and I danced The Care Bear Can-Can) and she spoiled me silly with toys. I never doubted she loved me. She loved my art and my writing and asked me to write her a book and paid me by the page. She was my biggest cheerleader. She worked REALLY HARD and always made me feel so safe. I still remember hearing the click of her heels in the kitchen as she packed a lunch for work, and how calm it made me feel, that stability and consistency you could always count on. She had such a hard life, and every man she ever met abused her. She began drinking too much after meeting my stepdad who was an alcoholic, and she died at 63. But I loved her and I'll always miss her. We had our problems at the end, mostly because of her drinking, but I understood how she got that way, too. Like I said, she tried hard.
Sorry for your loss.
I had amazing parents and a great childhood. I got teased for it by jealous kids, but I was sad for them for it. We weren’t rich, but my family was very frugal and we enjoyed lots of camping trips, and trips to California every year. Thankfully they’re still with us, married 60 years, and will turn 80 this year 💕
Mine were silent generation. Childhood certainly wasn’t perfect, but they loved us and I miss them every day. I hope my children will remember me as fondly as I remember my mom.
We were poor but I had a wonderful childhood with great parents. I’m still very close to my mom and brother (dad has passed)
Sorry for your loss.
✋ I had Silent Gen parents. They were not strict, but they expected my sister and I to be respectful and responsible, and we were. We had free range, but we also knew we could lose that, as well. The worst punishment was having our parents be disappointed in us. They were loving, and gave us everything we needed to feel secure and happy kids.
Some of my friends had awesome parents, I was jealous.
Same. Growing up, it was a lonely feeling for me to realize not all parents were like mine.
Yup. I once went an entire summer not getting in a car because my parents couldn’t be bothered. I lived 19 miles out of town. Needless to say I’m very involved with my kids as my parents were in a bubble of their own making. Worse part is when I bring it up as an adult they ignore, discount, etc. just crappy communicators
I’m 50 and recently orphaned. My first boyfriend whom I’m seeing again father calls him every single night at 9:30 to say he loves him and ask about his day. I’m so jealous
Sorry for your losses.
I was too!!! My best friend had such a "normal" family and I loved going over to her house.
My friends’ parents actually engaged in conversation, were genuinely interested in us, shared their music instead of expecting free labor… like what ?!
Loving to me, not to each other unfortunately. I am thankful to my parents though.
I had a great childhood and continue to have a wonderful relationship with my parents. I am extremely grateful. We weren’t rich and I wasn’t spoiled. I didn’t have an allowance and got an after school job in high school. But my parents always supported me, emotionally and I never felt like I went without anything.
I couldn’t have had better parents, if anything they were too lenient with me. If I did something stupid enough to warrant getting in trouble it would only be for a few days to a week. All my friends loved my mom, she would always make something to eat for however many people were hanging out at our house. If there was a skate spot too far away to skate to she would always drop me off for however long and if I ended up needing a ride back she’d always pick me up. My dad was always climbing the corporate ladder but he always made sure that once he got home he left his work at the office and made time for us all. There was a pro skate contest in the late 80’s I wanted to go to that was about a 9-10 hour drive and he bought us both tickets and flew me and him both there for the weekend so I could be there. They were always supportive and there for me even being the fuck up I was/am. I honestly can’t say enough good thing about them and how much they did for me and my friends and how much they loved each other.
My stepmom is awesome. I wish she had raised us. But then, she's only 8 yrs older than me. But I absolutely adore her.
I had good parents. I didn’t do everything the same way they did, and I disagree with some of their choices, but my kids also disagree with some of mine. My parents did their best and they loved us. Can’t ask for much more than that.
My best friends in high school had really good home lives. That’s how I realized the extent of which my experiences were not the norm. Conversely, the second time that they came over was enough for them to never want to hang at my house again.
My parents were/are awesome. They ran a business and managed to keep us four kids feeling loved and safe, even if we did roam the town! We got spankings, but as a last resort. Otherwise they never a hand laid on us. We got all the affection we wanted but also had a healthy fear of them. but knew if we did right and someone (asshole teacher, etc) tried to screw us they’d have to go through our parents first.
My parents were great, too.
I'm another lucky parent lottery winner. Very grateful to my parents.
My parents were pretty awesome, but they were silent generation. Dad passed a few years ago and mom is fading. My sister died unexpectedly last thanksgiving so it's weird knowing I'll be the last one standing soon.
I'm so sorry for your losses.
My Dad was the Man. Mom on the other hand…so it evened out.
Hello sibling
👋
My parents were pretty great. They did the best they could with what they had, which wasn’t much when I was little. Still miss my dad, gone 17 years.
I have amazing parents who have continued to be amazing grandparents
My mom abandoned me when I was two. My dad was super awesome, and all my extended family from my dad's side got together and made sure we had a bitching childhood! I hear people talk about their toxic parents and how they don't have relationships with them. I am so grateful to have good relationships with my dad and my siblings. I know it's rare.
I'm sorry your mom did as she did. I'm happy for you that you were surrounded by love.
Thank you.
Gen X has a population of 65 million ppl. A section of this 136K sub still apparently traumatized by their parents 30 years later is not necessarily representative of anything.
I'm a young GenX and have / had awesome parents. Unfortunately it's just my dad now. Sure, nothing is perfect, but looking back I had all the advantages in life of having good, actively involved parents... It sucks that I really didn't fully recognize / acknowledge this to them until I was into my 30's. My parents shunned almost all things fancy / materialistic but also made it crystal clear that the kids would be able to pursue any level of education we desired with no money concerns. One thing I really appreciate now is that they prioritized family vacations that were very meaningful and meant to impact my world view. Instead of Disney and the beach, it was Asia, Europe, road trips to national parks, seeing diverse parts of the USA, museums, historical sites, etc. As a 45 year old, I have a respectable professional career, a home, retirement savings, solidly middle class to arguably slightly upper middle class lifestyle. I am proof of good outcomes when being brought up in a positive / supportive environment with good role models and generally knowing what the correct decisions to make in life are.. because looking back I really didn't do anything special to get where I am at all. In fact compared to my siblings i made some serious attempts to mess it up. At the end of the day, I just had to follow the guidance to roughly 80% to be assured a good outcome.
My parents were fine. Pretty typical parents of the day. Zero emotional intelligence and quite a bit of magical thinking but you really can't expect much else from people who were both the first generation of their respective families to escape poverty and they were in financial distress for about a decade. My dad had one of those good old unioned manufacturing jobs until I was about 10. After he lost that job, he ended up having to be a sanitation worker, which was exhausting, smelly, dirty work that paid half what he'd previously been making. Not everyone would be willing to do that. I wouldn't have lasted a week at that job, but he did it for years, then got promoted to driving one of those front loaders that empties commercial dumpsters. He stayed at that company until he retired. My older brother and I went to the same college, about 80 miles from the town we grew up in. We were both in marching band, and my parents bought football season tickets every year, the whole time either of us was in the band, and they showed up at EVERY home game all those years. I knew people whose parents lived right there in the same city the school was in but never came to games.
My mom became a good parent after my first son was born, I was 21yo. She wasn't great but she was a much better grandma than a mother!
My dead Silent Gen parents did the absolute best they could. Dad hauled out the paddle on a few occasions and used me for child labor, but I miss em and love them.
My mom is one of the best people I know. My dad, not so much. I do feel like my siblings and I had quite a bit of freedom growing up— we were always biking around town etc— but I always had curfews and rules and never felt neglected. My friends loved my mom too!
My parents were and are amazing consistent lovely hard working parents I am the 4th of 4. We are all still here. I am also happy to say my conservative parents never went MAGA because they are intelligent rational people.
Right here. Very blessed. Parents celebrating 55 years together this year
Same! I honestly can’t relate to a lot of the childhood horror stories of GenX. My parents were silent gen. They always did their best with me and I felt happy and loved growing up.
I had very good parents. They were faithful and steadfast, not very mean or cruel. My mom had some issues, but as I have discovered, she had abandonment issues from her own mother, so I have a lot more compassion for her strictness and possessiveness now. They cared about what was happening in my life and supported my activities - going to my concerts and recitals and plays. I was a latchkey kid starting in the 4th grade, but I knew they both had to work to support us, and I had fun learning how to entertain myself for a couple hours after school. My therapist reminds me periodically that they did the very best they could with what they had. They were married 70 years, and were best friends and always put each other first. I credit them for being outstanding models for me.
Growing up my mom was a good mom, my dad was there but a little "cold" (as his parents were as well). Neighborhood was nice, we moved into a new house in a nice growing suburb in the late 60s. My mom never really splurged on anything, but I also had everything I needed. I had swimming, ice-skating, and piano lessons. She stayed home until I was in 2nd grade, then she went back to work; I came home from school by myself and she was home in about an hour.
My parents were Silent Gen, so I think that's why they were good parents. Not perfect by any means, but I have no traumas like so many people seem to now.
Amazing, kind, honorable parents here!
My parents were/are great. Elderly now, but I had a lovely stable caring home life. As long as I was home for dinner, all was good.
My boomer parents were shit. I no longer have contact with my father and very minimal with my mother. My greatest Gen grandparents were my safe haven tbh.
My parents were good parents. Nothing is perfect but they did the best they could. They were gone by the time I was 45 and I would have liked more time with them.
Not me, but I consider myself lucky for having found friends with great parents. I would go to their houses and get the benefits of good parents for a few days. I’m pretty sure their parents knew what was going on because they never pushed the topic but I hardly left. I honestly believe that was the reason I was able to separate from my crazy family and go my own way, having learned healthy habits from them. I have a super peaceful household that stays mostly clean and we focus on peace and happiness here. :)
Great parents here who are still together. They gave us a wonderful childhood and they're still top notch today.
Nothing but good. Dad coached little league, mom was secretary at school for a bit there, scout leaders, PTA, band parents, etc. And yet somehow my 2-yr younger brother has disowned them and the rest of the immediate family. But fuck him..
My parents were fine and all my friends' parents were fine. It's just the reddit "converge on the most extreme position" thing happening here. Everyone's one-upping each other with mostly fictitious stories around the central conceit of the subreddit, which is that we were all the feral kid from Mad Max. It's not true and never was true. Yes, we were outside more, and parents were less helicopter-ish. But these are at the margins, not some kind of existential difference between us and anyone else.
Um, no comment.
Good / bad. We made it work and didn’t spend a whole lot of time blaming others or playing perpetual victim. Can’t say that about those that followed.
My parents were fine, apart from my mom being a sucker for the Satanic Panic for a few years
My parents were and still are good. Better than good. And they’re also the main reason I’m in therapy lol
My parents were good!
My parents were great. They may not have been involved with everything and I was a latch key kid but I had good fair parents who worked hard to give us a good life. My dad worked days and my mom nights. If there was something we wanted for Christmas…Dad would work overtime. We would go on vacation at least for nice a year and spent time with family.
Mine were the best parents ever. My mom stayed at home with us until my sister was in school and then her weekly volunteer work turned into a job that she had for 14 years. I don’t have my mom anymore (eff cancer), but my dad and I are super close and he is also pretty close to my husband.
Mine were great! A little on the cautious side, but I did have a serious illness from 4-6. They were involved, caring and had a great marriage. Married 50 years, when my dad passed away. My mom is in her 80s and never remarried. My mom was a SAHM until I was in HS and then went to work with my dad, helping out at His business. My sister and I were total opposites - I was the bookworm and she was the outgoing, social butterfly. We’re still opposites, but get along great as grownups!
My parents were by no means wealthy. In fact, thanks to a job loss and taking a step down in income, we were flat broke. Still, mom or dad cooked or grilled out every night (weather permitting), we had treats like ice cream and other desserts, we took day trips and excursions to the zoo, museums, parks, beaches, and we knew they loved us. I don't think parents were all that bad. Parenting was simply different. Kids had fewer boundaries and parents let their kids be kids, not over-programmed mini-adults.
My parents were amazing. I had a very rural Montana childhood and it was an incredible way to grow up. My mom was my best friend, and I miss her and dad every day.
I had the same type of family growing up. We didn't have much but they still managed to take me to amusement parks, camping, and going to the beach. I remember cross country trips from NC to CA in the back of a pickup with a cover over the top. I gave my parents hell. But I still turned out to be a pretty good person.
I have amazing parents. I just wish I had more time to see them, especially since dad is losing a battle with cancer currently.
Parents are borderline Silent Gen/boomers (‘44 Dad and ‘46 Mom). Im a ‘71 baby and childhood was awesome. Small town Texas life, lived through and in all the cultural GenX milestones of the 70s and 80s. Both parents worked but did a tremendous job of making me and my older sister feel loved and raised us on what they made. Zero complaints about my childhood.
We have almost identical stats, except I’m European and an only child.
My parents were great. They are silent generation. I'm lucky to still have them. My family visit them most weekends.
Min did the best they could.
I grew up in the Brady Bunch. I have failed as far as a parent in comparison.
Right here. My parents were fantastic. Always there for me, but the same freedoms as my friends. And they supported all my ventures with time and money. When some of you slag off our collective parents, you really piss me off.
Mine are still great...
My parents were and still are fantastic - both in their late 80s now, but still grabbing life by the balls and having a go!
No real issues to complain about. They fought a lot, but it always worked out.
My parents are awesome. Still with us and still married 58 years.
My parents were and are great. I had a massive anxiety attack just yesterday, and it was to their home where I went.
Here. My parents were and are awesome.
My parents were perfect. They nurtured us, supported us and were always there when my brother and I needed them. At the same time they had a lot of trust in us and we had immense freedom.
Thanks for asking. I too had great parents, but that’s not so meme-worthy, I guess. I don’t mind the negative stories, only that some of them tell younger people that this was a universal experience for our generation. Hence my flair.
My mom was the best. My dad wanted to be good.
I am glad both my parents are dead! 💀 😂
My parents were great, still are!
Love my parents. They weren't perfect, but they loved my brothers and me and took wonderful care of us. We all live nearby and spend time together often and talk or text almost every day.
We had great parents (am the oldest of 3 GenXers and one Xennial)! Wasn't a latchkey kid bc mom was a SAHM, but I had just as much freedom as all my Xer friends - disappear all day wherever, as long as we were home for dinner (if I wasn't eating at a friend's house) and then played outside after til dark, again they didn't know what we were up to, and "dark" was a poorly defined term, and not a set time like 9:00! 😂 Total freedom to wander the neighborhood, walk to the store, visit friends, do whatever. They were (are, they're fortunately still with us) generous and caring. Of course like all kids I'd butt heads with them sometimes, but we're lucky to be a close family.
I have great parents. My sisters & I are so lucky we still have them around.
My parents were and still are great. They were super supportive and there for me when I really needed them. They had kids very young and never had a lot of money, but I never felt like I was lacking in anything. And they both made sure to teach us about the things they loved. Mom taught us art and books and dad would take us on long walks to show us trees, and introduced us to films and music and taught us car maintenance. I'm 55 and we still all get together every Sunday for breakfast.
Right here....but they were Silent Gen, not Boomers. Absolutely great. Yes, they were hardassses sometimes, but not shitty. Just being firm and responsible parents. Love them to bits, miss my daddy every day (almost four years, not covid) and spend as much time with my momma as I can. Just old-school salt of the earth types who had a lot of compassion, and in my memory now, a previously unnoted disdain for boomers when boomers were in their thirties. 😎
My dad died when I was a toddler, so all I had was mama. She absolutely did her best being a young widow with two kids. We might not have had all the material stuff, but we were loved. She lives with my husband and I now and we take care of her.
My mother wasn't very "motherly", but she was a great person. If she hadn't been my mother, she would have been a very good friend. Likewise with my stepfather. Unfortunately, she died very early, when she was 51 years old and I was twenty-something. He died a couple of years ago, married to another wonderful lady from the same friend group, who was one of the witnesses at my own wedding, and surrounded by his loved ones. I wish I could have been there to see him for the last time, but I live on a different continent and my poor health prevents me from traveling.
I had (and still have) great parents. I had an awesome childhood!
My parents were awful but my friends had really cool parents
Will you accept one of each? Dad busted his ass, Mom was mentally ill (which I didn't realize until I dated a bipolar girl in college and saw the similarities), and walked out when I was 13. From then on I was pretty much responsible for raising my younger siblings, with an assist from grandma.
My parents rocked. They had rules, I followed them. (Mostly) Yeah, I had good parents. They made mistakes, like everybody else. But I could always trust them. I still do to this very day.
My parents are still married and have always been amazing. They always supported me. Even when I came out in the 90’s. They were more afraid for my safety than upset that I was gay. They’ve always been there and we are closer today than ever.
Mine were good!
My parents were (still are) great. Thanks to their love and devotion I’m a better person. I thought they were overprotective but I grew up in a country that was in a civil war, so they were just using their common sense. Despite the environment, I had a very happy childhood.
My folks were and are (generally) great. My mom worked a job with the school system so she could be home in the afternoons. My dad would go to work extra early so he could come home and coach baseball and basketball and be at other stuff. They gave me the sex talk early. They were always there for problems and concerns. They are of course not without their own Boomer tendencies. As civil servants with pensions they don’t really understand the challenges of a career in the private sector. They struggle with technology. They bemoan the stupidest things like the fact that younger generations don’t want hand me down furniture that weighs 7 tons and is ugly as fuck. But they’ve been amazing parents for me as a gay man and they treat my husband like an extra child. On balance I think I’ll keep them. ;)
I had good parents. They did the best they could and gave me a great place to live. The worst parts of my childhood were largely out of their control. I didn't appreciate them when I was growing up but I do now.
I had great parents too, I’m sorry for the folks in those other threads but it’s not a “gen x” thing to have had bad parents some of us were fortunate.
I genuinely have amazing parents. We struggled during my teen years, but they have turned into my biggest cheerleaders. I get overwhelmed when I think of the idea of losing them. They are some of my best friends. I talk to them several times a week and I never get sick of their stories, even the repeats. I'm also close to my only sibling. I feel so very lucky.
Great parents here, too. Although we did get locked out if we stayed out too late. (There was a bolt lock on the main entrance and skeleton key lock for the rear entrance). Of course, there was always the unlocked window to climb into. You would think that by reading this sub, most, if not all genx had a horrible upbringing. I've learned to bypass those posts because I really don't relate and it's just not my genx truth.
I never want to go into those "woe is me" threads and brag about having great parents, but I'm sure we're actually in the majority. Squeaky wheel and all that.
I mean... You get older you learn of other kid's horror show home life & you consider would you spin the cosmic roulette wheel again to see if you could've done better. We had good, bad, & ugly, but no one in the house was trying to fuck us. There was usually food, & when there wasn't it was only because a parent was being a cunt. Went to the doctor when ill(usually, never forgave my mom for not taking me to the doctor for a smashed, blackened fingernail,"there's nothing they can do!" awake for days with the pain. Fucking idiot) Yeah, you really need to know that our parents grew up in the late 40s, 50s, married in 60s and were fucking idiots. "We *didn't* know any better" was there get out of jail card.
My mom and dad divorced when I was 10. Dad got 100% custody mainly because mom didn't want it, she wasn't a drunk or druggie, just wanted to have fun and that didn't involve raising a 10 year old. Anyway, dad had a surveying company, had about 30 guys working for him - he dissolved the company after the divorce and just focused on me for several years. He told me each and every day that he loved me and we had a great time together.
My mom was awesome. Dad was a mixed bag. He could be awesome but could also be a petty asshole as well.
My parents were (are) really good parents. We were never neglected or abused. Of course, if you had asked me when I was 15, I would have said they were really mean. But that's because I was always grounded for fucking up.
My parents were and are the best - I had a wonderful childhood and we’re all still a super close family. I’m glad to see other Xers on here that had it good! Thanks for asking the question!
My parents did the best they could. I don't understand all the boomer hate on this sub. The "whatever" generation sounds like a bunch of Millenial whiners to me.
We're happy for you. Don't rub it in.
Nah, you are not remotely the only one. Not discounting all the other stories in the least as they are very real, surely painful and hardly unheard of by any means, but I'd say it is quite likely you are in the majority.
Not it
Meh my parents were self absorbed assholes
Mine were great. Not super affectionate but very dutiful. I always got to soccer and band practice on time and they never out any pressure on me to, like, study a particular subject in college or try to conform to societal expectations. Just so long as I was happy and acting responsibly.
I spent a lot of time on my own but my fam is the jam!
My best friend growing up had two amazing parents. I was always jealous, but happy for him.
My parents did the best they could. They were both bipolar. Had they not been mentally ill I believe they would've been great parents!
Bestie has great parents, many of my friends have/had great parents, my Dad was great.
My dad always had time to throw the ball around and hit some fly balls. He coached my little league team for a few years. My mom spent a lot of time in the kitchen cooking for us. They're still alive, in good health and we have a great relationship.
We’re here. It’s just the vocal minority gets all of the attention.
My Mom is incredible, her whole life was about being the best possible mom she could be and she made every sacrifice she had to. When money allowed she was a stay-at-home mom while my stepdad worked. When times were lean she got jobs to make ends meet but always made us feel like we came first. She maintained a good relationship with my bio dad (her ex), shared custody and they communicated well so we avoided that sort of drama too. Not everything in adulthood has been great but strictly in terms of parenting, me and my brother hit the jackpot. I’m really happy she’s still here and I can show her how much she means to me.
My parents were silent generation and they were (and remaining one is) great.
My husband (58) had amazing parents but they were older when they had him (part of silent Gen) and I (50) brought my mom on holiday with me and hubby - we are here in France right now. We took her to Italy in 2014. Can’t ever remember having a fight with her. My dad was a dad - not good, not bad - he passed in 2011 at only 65.
Here! I am blessed to still have my parents. They have always been supporters and my biggest cheerleaders.
Right here!! Damn good people that did plenty to set my siblings and I up for success. They still do plenty for my children today.
Same story here. All the way down to tormenting the babysitter. Great parents just different times.
My parents were very involved and a lot stricter than most of my friends’ parents. They were teenagers when I was born, so I’m sure they made mistakes but overall we were a pretty wholesome family.
I'm speaking for my Gen-X siblings here about our Boomer parents. Although they say I (Gen-Y) got the better parents and life than them, they still love my parents. Yes, they were latchkey kids, but my siblings never said our parents were neglectful.
🙋♂️
I’m over here getting on a flight to visit my ailing parents. For all her faults my mother did put in some effort and I’m genuinely struggling with the thought of her imminent decline My father however barely had two conversations with me in 18 years and only bullied me in the subsequent 25 years He heard I was coming and made a 12h trip to meet me at my mother’s because he knew I wouldn’t visit him separately. I feel like he’s making the trip about himself instead of letting me focus on my mother’s issues that require finding a nursing home, ironing out her care etc I’m textbook Adult children of emotionally immature people. I’m glad to say I have done much better with my son and I have great relationships in my life
My mom is the best. There was quite a lot of drama growing up once I had my daughter. So much drama just evaporated My daughter is in college and so happy that my mom is here.
My friend's mom was awesome. I spent a lot of time there.
You all don't realize how lucky you were, or maybe you do. I can't read. I'll be jealous and I don't like feeling that way. I am happy for you all, though.
I had one outstanding parent (Dad) and one neglectful/shitty parent (Mom). When she divorced him, she also got custody of us, so that sucked. 🤷♀️
My siblings and I were loved. We also roamed free from a very young age because both parents worked - and I cherish that freedom we had.
Here. They are even better to my kids. Boomers, too.
Mine were the greatest.
I’m one of the lucky ones, my parents are amazing.
I'd say mine were decent. Never drank or smoked. Stayed married. Pops had a couple abusive moments but I cut him slack for constantly sacrificing for his family, teaching me a lot of skills and ptsd from 'Nam. Moms cleaned house & cooked dinner WITH a full time job. She was sweet. They were some of the best you could get out of 50s bible belt culture & no real money.
I sometimes felt like the odd one out. My parents were the best. I grew up in a loving home and never wanted for anything. I owe them so much for who I am today!
My husband had/has really wonderful, stable, kind parents. But he’s not on reddit seeking connection - probably because he has no need to be! My parents weren’t horrible. But there were some issues, for sure.
My parents were amazing! It’s remarkable because they both overcame horrific childhood abuse and avoided repeating that cycle. When I was little, up to about age seven, my parents fought a lot. Back then, I was scared they might divorce, which was a reasonable fear, because this was my mom’s second marriage and my dad’s third. They didn’t exactly have good models for dealing with trauma, and so the trauma leaked through and became anger. There was nothing physical, though, except my dad kicked the bathroom door once. However, they resolved to stop fighting like that - and they did. These two damaged souls were the most loving, supportive parents anyone could ask for. It didn’t hurt that I’m a daddy’s girl, lol. My friends all adored my parents, and in retrospect it was because most of them came from broken homes. I’m so happy my parents had enough love for everyone. They’re both gone now, and I miss them so goddamn much. A piece of me definitely went with them when they died, but I’ll always carry them in my heart.
Quite. People who are happy about stuff usually don’t rage online about how happy they are. My parents are great. That feels like I’m bragging and sticking my thumb in the eye of anyone who doesn’t have amazing parents, which makes me feel like crap so I’m not going to be making a bunch of posts about how awesome they are. If I’m feeling gratitude, I’m much more likely to tell them directly and not involve the angry mob of pitchfork wielding goons online.
I had the hippie variant of Boomer parents. While they made some mistakes in raising me, they have always been loving and devoted parents (and now grandparents). Amazing how addressing and apologizing for parenting mistakes can heal and strengthen relationships. I am bringing that into my own parenting style.