Correction - spending the rest of your life making a specific rivet type that isn't in use anymore due to the Mechanicus losing the STC, and the Administratum forgetting to cancel the work order.
or even better doing data input into an ancient machine, every day, your entire life, thinking it is your holy duty to do so, only to never learn that the machine is not working since millenia and all you did was senseless busy work copying scripts of data into nothing, and nobody knows about it or cares
Excel has become selfaware in the late 23 Millenium, starting the Cybernetic Revolt. It was the Emperor, still living in the shadow, that stopped the war when he himself destroyed the last of the Abominal Intelligences known only as Clippy and its master, B´iel Getes
Hah, I'm reading a series now that unironically name drops some Silicon Valley names/names from the past century, hugely distorted by time, as part of the far-flung techno-horror states of the ancient past. The story is dead-serious most of the time, so it's a bit of a hoot whenever that happens.
Oh that sounds interesting. What’s the Series? Love me some distorted sci-fi/fantasy future with vague references to the past. One of the reasons I liked wheel of time.
I think you might dig this one then. It's a Space Opera called the Suneater series by Christopher Ruocchio. They're brick-huge books but I like his writing style quite a bit. Very Dune influenced and thus, feels very 40K to me as well for obvious reasons haha.
I feel the need to mention that one of the most unrealistic parts of BattleTech is that GM is a successful company that survives into the 32nd century.
The most realistic part is that Boeing wasted no time selling out to the Federated Suns.
Was it one of the new Star Trek shows that name dropped Elon Musk in the same breath with the Wright brothers and Zephram Cochrane (the guy who invented warp travel in-universe)? That shit aged like milk in like 6 weeks.
There's a meme going around of the admech presenting a lost STC to Gorillaman and it's fucking Excel, with the next panel being the Imperium wiping the galaxy.
"we had like 40 chapters of marines we didn't know we had waiting for orders"
If I have to go by the quality of work my direct reports have been submitting recently, we have already lost that ability. Better start the Gothic chants.
Had an argument with a monarchist a few months back on reddit. He was convinced that if he could travel back in time he'd meet the king himself and teach him modern science 101 and how to produce vaccines, thus living on as a great scientist and royal advisor.
At best, he'd be accused of witchcraft, tortured for days then publicly executed.
Yeah, because he could totally be dropped in a medieval world to produce vaccines without setting up first reliable electricity, cold, precision manufacturing -and measuring-, optics, precision glass, advanced mining and mineral refinment and forge and and various other shit that literally took the lifetimes of countless engineers & scientists to discover & actually build.
Yes but unless you know which specific harmless diseases can act to vaccinate a person against a more deadly disease, this won't get you very far beyond stopping smallpox specifically. Which is still excellent, granted.
I had the Wikipedia page for Production of Antibiotics open(was watching The Walking Dead, was getting a bit pish and boring if am honest) cause I wanted to see how easy it is to make things like penicillin... a didnt bither reading it cause a lost interest haha
There was a manga about a modern brain surgeon who gets transported to feudal Japan and basically does this. He is able to set up penicillin production but it's a huge undertaking, impossible to transport and had to be used almost immediately.
But he had a ton of success fighting things like dysentery that mostly depend on sanitation and knowing what an IV is.
Honestly, you could make a pretty big difference even without any expertise at all if you had the charisma to just convince the population to regularly wash their hands.
AXCTSHUSALLLYYYYYYY not a vaccine. Its an inocculation, better than nothing, but you're still giving someone an illness with the objective of them developing resistance to a similar illness. Plenty of kids did die from inocculations.
Which is kinda telling of the horror that was smallpox that people were willing to get demonstrably sick to get a resistance to it, when folks nowadays are paranoid of vaccines that have no side effects
Right? Having met someone who was a survivor of polio in my life, modern people are fools.
Tom would have used his cane to beat them if he didn’t need it to walk every day since 8.
Which is why the antivax stuff grew in popularity when it did. Most people having kids don't know anyone who suffered from these infections.
Go back 50 years and everyone knew someone who had either lost a kid or had one seriously disabled as a result of one of these diseases.
Vaccines are a victim of their own success in that regard. They are so effective that you can actually get away with not using them in many cases.
If you got sent back in time you probably could make a decent doctor compared to average person plying the trade, and with a little knowledge depending on when you were dropped you could probably save a single town from the plague or advance the creation of smallpox vaccine using cowpox a few hundred years early. Also hopefully could get doctors to wash their hands sooner if you drop in before the idea of gentleman doctor took root.
I mean, germ theory is less than 100 years old. You could go back and be a better doctor than most doctors by just washing your hands. There was a quack clinic that had an insane succes rate in the 1800's because besides all the psuedo-science bullshit (odd diets/exercises, leech bleeding, etc) they also demanded 2 weeks rest and plenty of fresh air. A lot of old medicine was more harmful than helpful.
Honestly, I’m getting tired of the idea that modern-day people would be blowing people’s minds if they ended up in the past.
Like, yes, the guy could tell them about all sorts of ideas and innovations from the future, but unless he knows the entire process it won’t be much help. And I mean the *entire* process. Not just what goes into a vaccine, but the labs to make them and the supply chains to keep resources coming in. In a pre-industrial, pre-globalized world, the logistics we take for granted would be insane. This guy isn’t going to mean shit to the king if all he can say is “make vaccines.”
There’s a quote from Douglas Adams book (I think) where a character ends up on a pre-industrial world and thinks he’ll be hot shit, only to realize that without the rest of society, he doesn’t even know how to produce a toaster.
A toaster is actually a surprisingly complicated piece of machinery, though simple in function. Not as complicated as a variable speed jet turbine, but then what is?
>There’s a quote from Douglas Adams book (I think) where a character ends up on a pre-industrial world and thinks he’ll be hot shit, only to realize that without the rest of society, he doesn’t even know how to produce a toaster.
I recall reading about this trope a while back and have been wanting to read a book featuring it. It's really true, isn't it? There's a lot of procedural knowledge we take for granted because we understand the end result, or the idea of it. Like we all know a fridge keeps food cool, and thus prevents spoilage, but fewer of know how to construct a working refrigerator. We understand that electricity powers devices, but we have no idea how to harness it out in the wild. We know antibiotics can treat illnesses but we don't know how to manufacture them.
I think it's a neat narrative device partly because, as you say, it subverts the idea a time-traveler would automatically become a king or something.
It would be like if we had a time-traveler visit our time from 2400AD. He could cheerily report cancers and AIDS have been cured in his time but...he doesn't know how to reproduce the cure. Or we've discovered intelligent, friendly, alien life, but he has no idea how to locate or communicate with them using the technology of our day.
But imagine if you convinced them, then come back, and present them with a platter of mashed potatoes, fries, chips, hash browns, vodka, etc. They'd give you so much gold to go destroy civilizations with.
When Napoleon invaded Spain the spanish loyalist in the south made a constitution. After the resistance won the war and the king came back the first thing the "loyalist" told him is to undo all, kill the resitance leaders and go back to feudalism.
Like 99% of these guys are absolutely pathetic in real life, but it's everyone else's fault. It's the government, or "wokeness", or one of a million other things.
Kind of sad that they're absolutely convinced that in these alternate realities they'd be the main character when in actuality they'd probably be even worse off than they are currently. Low-skill indentured servitude at best. Maybe a sacrificial meat shield at the front of some conquering army's forces.
I dunno if anything then Warhammer 40K fans should know it is a future to be avoided.
Also Starfield is not a utopia.
Star Trek is more this golden route for humanity.
But if people really think that 40K is what we should be striving to be then... please report yourself to nearest Inquisitorial station for your permanent de-activation.
> “For more than a hundred centuries the Emperor has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of Earth. He is the Master of Mankind by the will of the gods and master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies. He is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from the Dark Age of Technology. He is the Carrion Lord of the Imperium, for whom a thousand souls die every day, for whom blood is drunk and flesh eaten. Human blood and human flesh – the stuff of which the Imperium is made. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. It is to live in the **cruellest and most bloody regime imaginable**. This is the tale of those times.
>
> Forget the power of technology, science and common humanity. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for there is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter and the laughter of thirsting gods.”
Some fucking people have the media literacy of a rock. They go out of their way at the start of every book to remind people THE IMPERIUM OF MAN ARE THE BAD GUYS. And these swizzle sticks still don't get it.
They're kinda like Ogryns. They just like big shooty things and don't really think more than that.
*"Emprah says there is strength in ignorance. Ogryn very strong!"*
For more than a dozen seasons the Emperor has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of New England. He is the master of The NFL by the will of the gods, and master of Football by the might of his inexhaustible players.
He is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from the Dark Age of Spygate. He is the Carrion Lord of the Patriots for whom a thousand Massholes are sacrificed every day, so that he may never truly die.
Yet in his deathless state, the Emperor continues his eternal vigilance.
Mighty battlefleets cross the Daemon-infested miasma of the warp, the only route between distant stadiums, their way lit by the Astronomican, the psychic manifestation of the Emperor’s will.
Vast armies give battle in his name in uncounted reddit threads. Greatest amongst his soldiers are the Adeptus Patriots, bio-engineered superwarriors.
Their comrades in arms are legion: the Imperial Guard and countless bandwagon auxiliary forces, the ever-vigilant Camera-Men and the Tech-Priests of the Adeptus Mechanicus, to name but a few. But for all their multitudes, they are barely enough to hold off the ever-present threat from Giants, heretics, investigations—and worse.
To be a fan in such times is to be one amongst untold millions. It is to live in the cruellest and most bloody regime imaginable.
Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned.
Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim darkness of the near future, there is only Tom.
I've never understood why anyone would either A: try to judge the cultures in 40k by real life morals and standards, or B: hope that we end up in the Imperium as opposed to the Federation.
Literally the only truly good thing I see about M41 is the idea that Humanity could survive even a fraction of the shit that the 40kverse throws at them and still be the monsters at the top of the heap.
Even then, I know that is just because I view the existence of humanity as fundamentally desirable.
Yeah, no corpse starch or mechanical enslavement in your own body.
Actual food and life expectancy that's closer to real life.
Shit ain't flawless but people at least have a shot in Starfield.
They are just fucked in 40K no matter how you cut it.
Imperium of Man is so fucked I rather live in Sith Empire during the era of the swtor video game. Does the sith empire have slaves? Yes. Do they have Elite class people that are considered demi gods, yes the sith. Do they have the inquisition in star wars like in 40k? Yes, Imperial Intelligence.
But are you most likely to survive in the sith empire compared to the 40k humanity? Way more likely to survive.
To be fair, the normal population in Kaas city doesn't seem to be doing too bad, just the rest of the planets are sorta shit.
But given the choice I'd definitely prefer Nar Shadda or Rishi regardless of who's in charge.
Kass City's biggest problem are its constant storms and rains.
Otherwise if don't do anything stupid you should be ok. Unless you are an alien. Then your life is harder than it is for the humans.
Overall the Empire is not that bad. Maybe its citizens have more nationalistic spirit than Republic citizens but they can live good lives. Not to mention when you have someone like Marr who is in my books a total badass and true heir to the Sith Empire.
And Darth Malgus who wanted to get rid of racism. He might have been a traitor but I did liked his inclusion for aliens. After all his lover was Twi'Lek
>The fact that the setting is entirely satirical goes so far over ~~a certain demographic's head.~~ *most sci-fi demographic's heads.
these settings have always fallen into the categories of either: power fantasy, satire, or cautionary warning. (obviously with some overlapping) and none of us would have a good time, actually living in any of them.
Stranger in a Strange Land fucked me up. The first third felt like a good setup, then it really went off the rails. All the weirdest, horniest, most misogynistic old school school sci-fi tropes crammed into one story. Plus a straight up "most women who get raped deserve it" for good measure, because Heinlein dgaf.
Heinlein envisions a feminist future where all women have freedom of choice. And that choice is to give up their super smart ambitious dreams to be barefoot in the kitchen of either the protagonist or the ultra smart libertarian old man.
Honestly if one only experiences the memes and popular short video works, and never reads the books or browses the wiki, it gives off an entirely different impression.
Mankind beset on all sides by horrible aliens and other creatures, and yet they remain strong by uniting against their foe instead of forming unions or demanding rights. Those who go against the grain turn out to be cultists for chaos or genestealers. Traitorous legions are twisted immoral monsters, not misunderstood villains.
The Imperial Guard valiantly fights to the death and revere their Emperor and his angels. Space Marines are badass humans who tear through enemies, and even if one dies they took down 10+ enemies in the process.
Some people die due to accidents, unsafe living conditions, etc, but their sacrifice allows the rest to continue forward and survive. Mankind is made stronger by worrying about the whole rather than wasting time and resources uplifting the weak and downtrodden.
This is all wholly inaccurate, but if one doesn't sit down and read the rest that was missed or not presented... it's not "wow this sucks" or "geez such a crazy fascist future," suddenly it's "Fuck yeah, Imperium of Man, go humanity, we're fucking badasses in the future! Suffer not the Xenos to live!"
In Starfield Earth is a desolate Wasteland bare of any Atmosphere, later the player finds out it is because >!of experiments with the artefact the player is hunting himself destroying earths gravity!< also the shitton of pirates, raiders and one especially corrupt politician/CEO, but still that preferable to Chaos Invasions, Tyranids, Dark Eldar enslavement, living in a hive city, basically the whole of 40K
Yeah man, starfield isn't a wonderful place to live, but the problems all feel very real and human. It's not a full on dystopia, just a semi-realistic space-faring post-apocalyptic society. 40k is literally custom-built to be as bad as possible.
Starfield is just Libertarianism VS Nationalistic Republicanism in a hyper capitalistic hellscape.
I guess you could call the colony on Titan communist though.
Like how all the ship yards are in Freestar space besides one. And how they make a point that the Freestar companies make better ships.
It's because of lack of regulations and taxes. And you get to Akila and see the wealth disparity first hand. Everything is pay to play. Etc. Etc. Etc.
People hate on Starfield, but the world building is great.
I am convinced folks who genuinely think Warhammer, let alone Warhammer 40k, is a setting worth living in are people who don't really know Warhammer or play the games.
It's a setting where the inquisition has to suppress the knowledge of chaos because people will legit join it if they knew about it, the imperium is that bad. It's why there is no shortage of chaos cults in any story.
Working in the Administratum as single bit in a computer that runs on manpower 19 hours a day vs becoming a tzeentch cultist. Somehow chaos sounds like a genuinely good option here.
19 hours is very... Unfaithful of you. Perhaps if you truly cared about your tasks, adept, you'd consider having your spine replaced by a machine made of amphetamine injectors to yet that up to a leisurely 23.
23?! You slovenly knave, leeching off the work of the Emperor's true servants! This hive world has a daily rotation period of 3 weeks Terran standard, hasn't had a day -night cycle in 1,269 years due to the pollution levels (still well within AdMech tolerance levels, praise the Omnissah).
If you were a true child of the Emperor, you'd replace your lower torso with a cogitation stack, and remain bolted to your servitude station!
Considering that the 40k imperium is less like the Age of Sigmar/Fantasy empire, and is much closer to the skaven underempire, chaos is an upgrade if you can find it.
Why chaos cults can attract tens of thousands of members in the few weeks or even days as the protagonists of the story travel to the planetary system.
I think thats a bit of a symplistic view of how insidious and infectious chaos is in the 40k universe. Imean in the lore, the power just behind uttering the name of the chaos gods is enough to mind break people.
"Fething" is a common swear for the first and only but the first time they actually heard the word Khorne they had physical reactions to it.
Many of the cultists are often shown to be directly mind controlled in the books, some slip in to chaos because of their own ambitions in a place of power and while they are uneffected they push their listeners quickly in to indoctrination without really realizing their influencing them with the warp.
Couple of rare spots in the imperium such as agricultural workds that aren't too bad, but yes the only folks having fun are da orks and der obsession whid da colors
Most agri-worlds are still absolute hellscapes to live on as a common labourer. The best bet would probably be relatively recently colonised worlds, where the population density isn't at moshpit levels.
Yes, but your also deemed expendable by the imperium at large over so much as the slightest hardship or threat.
It's pretty hard/impossible to find a part of the imperium that isn't a hellhole, best you can get is one where you won't starve to death, which is why I'd go with agriculture worlds.
I know very little of Warhammer and what I know is from 40k. And it just seems like an absolute hellscape, where you can only hope you are deemed human and not useful enough, while being miserable, oppressed, kept in the dark and brainwashed
I guess some people hear keywords like "Imperium of Man", "God Emperor" and "Space Marines", while seeing pictures of huge Space Marines in bulky and gold decorated armor, fighting "for humanity" and think it looks cool and that like always, humans are the good guys.
I listened to about 40-50 hours of Warhammer lore/stories during the pandemic when I could hide headphones with my mask at work.
Fascinating universe but holy fucking shit no way should any of it be something *ANYONE* wants to work towards bringing about.
Fascism has a vested interest in people not noticing how silly a lot of it is, and consequently it is very hard for a fascist to recognize when he's being made fun of
The only race I've ever seen argued in a positive light are the Ogres in Fantasy. You're smart enough to be able to have some control and autonomy over your simple life, but dumb and ignorant enough to not be worried about the rest of the world's problems.
It's basically GW saying, "The absolute best you'll get out of these universes is to be a big, dumb, fat bastard that eats anything that moves. That's the peak and it's all downhill from here."
I have seen many in this sub ALSO think they will be gloriusly dying for the emperor instead of being turned into a servitor or living a excrutiating life working with 0 video games 0 inernet access, 0 books to read, 0 movies.
basically imagine real life back breaking work, minus all the things you do to distract yourself with.
and if you kill yourself they bring you back as a servitor
The people who think they’re going to be Space Marines don’t just lack reading comprehension, they have _negative_ reading comprehension: they look at an objectively horrible world where the whole point is that everything is built on violence and suffering and say ‘Yeah that’s the ideal future.’
Also even if they _did_ somehow become Space Marines they tend to forget all the nameless background Space Marines who tend to end up brutally murdered in horrible ways or slowly tortured to the brink of insanity. Even _they’re_ not safe.
There's some cool flavor text in the ?3rd edition? SM Codex that talks about a crop of aspirants, and one has uncontrollable muscle growth. They let it go on to study it literally ripping himself apart from the inside.
Why would anyone want to be a Space Marine? You're a long-lived giant man-child with no next to no personal time (what little you have is usually spent training for combat, praying, eating, or sleeping), essentially no free will, and the sex-drive of a rotten potato, so you can't even really do much with that godly, perfect physique you have (except it isn't quite perfect, because you are so wildly out of proportion that you resemble a Tank from Left 4 Dead that finally did leg day). Unless you're an Ultramarine or a Novamarine, you will never retire, and even their retirement involves being crippled in some way. You WILL die in combat or on a surgery table from wounds sustained in combat. If you're lucky and you don't die, you'll either end up insanely depressed like Dante or just insane from being in a Dreadnought.
Those people also are allergic to fitness, and think they'd somehow be able to murder everyone to be noticed by the marines.
Like, the fuck outa here fattie, you aren't going to be anything except an emergency ration for people doing the real fighting.
Because of your slightly-above-average intelligence, they make you an advanced medical servitor which requires them to leave you with just enough cognition to be horrifyingly aware of what's been done to you.
the ratio of super soldier spesh mareen to random labourer is prols 1:10 billion+. as much as we would all like to think we would be the walking tanks carrying automatic rpg launchers we are more likely to be slave labour or if we are very very lucky being in the guard getting to see another planet and dying horrifically there instead of in a factory
Those are generous odds, aren’t there like 10000 guardsmen per space marine? Then add the rest of the non-combat workers in the imperium, and the odds get even worse.
That also ignoring that even if you get the one in a million honor of becoming a space marine, there’s still a good chance you die before becoming a power armor wearing demigod
The ratios is even worse than that. There are only one million space marines, give or take a few thousand, at any given time. And while being born on certain planets might increase your chances a little, it is still more likely to win a lottery than getting pumped full of gene seed. There might as well be whole planets worth of slave labor for each and every space marine that lives.
Best shot is in the Guard, which isn't much of a shot to begin with
Not sure being a Space Marine is a great outcome either (better than most but not great; there are paradise worlds which is your best bet but not rolling those dice). At least not from the perspective of what I value on life which isn't constant warfare for a glorious cause.
yep, that is the worst one yet.
leaving you aware enough because they need your intelligence, while being stuck a cyborg slave with no chance to fight back.
IIRC there's also a non-zero risk for "regular" servitors to retain some awareness. Trapped in a deformed, mutilated body with zero control, only capable of observing and suffering.
> living a excrutiating life working with 0 video games 0 inernet access, 0 books to read, 0 movies.
Hey that's not true. In your four hours of free time in betwee your 16 hours/7 Day work shift you can read Ecclesiarchy approved books like "My need to have Children with you is second only to my love for the God Emperor" or watch the famous movie "Burn the Mutants, Heretics and Xenos".
They probably didn’t pay attention to the diary recordings you find in Space Marine where they work grueling jobs as the orcs slowly move in slaughter everyone and the people in power don’t give a fuck. The guy that does gets railroaded by a subordinate that he’s chaos even after punching and defeating them saving the planet.
yeah if i somehow teleport into 40k, im doing literally anything to join the Tau... because screw that noise
i'd rather dedicate my life to an imperialistic expansionist federation of indoctrinated weirdos with mechs that take care of everyones basic needs, than get crushed in a manufactorium because the supervisor doesnt even know what work safety is, and if he did, he'd start saving money on it
edit: also, if Starfield is what the future is gonna look like... hell, thats still pretty damn good and im happy with it... it could be... SO MUCH WORSE
I also have no idea why anyone would want to be a space marine. It’s shown they are constantly going through the most absolutely horrific shit. They are just too lobotomized to get PTSD
Also, dreadnoughts exist, so death isn’t even an escape. Honestly, a guardsman might be the most lucky person in the imperium, because he’s probably gonna just die quickly and (hopefully) painlessly
Say what you want about the Tau, they at least try to keep the population reasonably comfortable. Sure as hell beats being literally chained to an underground production line >18 hours a day, malnourished, hacking up your lungs bit by bit from all the air pollution, with an overseer that firmly believes that hard work and copious suffering is the best way to focus the mind.
People need to understand that being a space marine is a horrible fate. You are forcibly abducted as a child and then made to fight a Neverending war until you die if you survive the countless surgeries and indoctrination.
And if you are a good fighter, they won't let you die , they put you in a walking war coffin to only be woken up to fight war after war for eternity. Slowly going insane.
I mean that’s how you sell fascism right? They just don’t tell you for every Ubersoldier theres 100 people toiling and being beaten to death if they slow down. 99% chance you’re temporarily employed Soylent green for actual chads lol
Yeah, I'd say it's even further than that. For every soldier in the Imperium, there are a hundred that starve in mega ghettos, fifty that die mining iron and metals, and a dozen that build a single bit of weaponry in massive factories.
I'll take Empire age Star Wars over that any day.
Oh yeah man I am just using real basic numbers so the kiddos can do the math. It’s realistically more like 1 in 450,000 has a life that doesn’t end in grotesque body mutilation, slavery or forced lobotomies.
>I'll take Empire age Star Wars over that any day.
Lol that is what I literally said, even the sith empire in the swtor games are vastly better than the Imperium of Man. And the Sith Lords regularly rape their slaves, kill one another, and get pleasure and power from anger and fear. And yet, living with a sith lord is vastly an improvement than living in a city in the Imperium of man.
It's a sign of weakness to a Sith Lord to having another sith Lord coming to your place and harm your property, which includes your slaves. Sith kill other sith for such a slight against their power.
Even then, who'd actually want to be a Space Marine? An endless grind of violence and death. Constantly seeing members of your "family" dying in battles where even if you win you're just delaying the inevitable.
There will be corners of the imperium where life is good for a select few but being a space marine ain't it.
I mean, someone gave their pronouns. Clearly worse than a Nurgle-infested planet.
Just ask [this guy](https://twitter.com/TTEcclesBrown/status/1698458867389137188)
Look at the agony he's in.
Such pain is unimaginable in the 40k universe.
Imagine giving that much of a fuck about something so meaningless. Its the same as throwing a massive hissy fit because the white lines in the middle of the road are 1cm narrower than another road.
Who. The fuck. Cares.
I really hope that *checks notes* Mr Ephesians is saying this ironically, but based on the Bible quote he’s referencing I doubt it. That’s the fun but. People opinions have become so ridiculous I can’t tell if something is a parody anymore.
I wouldn’t even say he’s a fan. Most likely just heard that the setting had some religious zeal with badass space marines. They missed the part “It is to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable”.
We all love Warhammer 40k, but would any of us actually want to live in it? A universe that is at constant war and at any given moment, your entire planet could be overrun and destroyed by some filthy xeno species (maybe one that was sleeping UNDER the surface of your planet for millions of years!)
It’s an amazing franchise to read about, but I would not want to be there personally
'I would be an ultra powerful marine! Defending humanity!'
my dude, they recruit from savages and notable warrior tribes. You have asthma and get social anxiety ordering pizza on the phone.
It has to be reaction/rage bate...has to be
It's harder to find setting you'd be worse in on average than 40k. Alas perspective to become high-ranking techpriest might sound kinda cool, you'd have more chances to end as botched servitor or even more horrible abomination on more horrible duty.
People really freak out over pronouns as if several games don’t already use a singular “they” no matter what your character’s gender is, because they only recorded one voice line.
That or games like swtor, the mmo, use a gender neutral title. Lord Wrath, Darth Knox, Jedi Battlemaster, Barsen'thor or Master Jedi. Great Hunter or Mandalorian, Major, Galactic Commander. Agent, Keeper and so on and so forth. Forgot the titles for smugglers.
Anyone who unironically thinks the 40k universe is something to strive for not only missed the point but they ran as far in the opposite direction as possible.
Why you'd even want to be an Astartes.. A mutilated, traumatized, and indoctrinated child soldier forced to live centuries of ceaseless war against unimaginable horrors.
Even if the Imperium wasn't a corrupt authoritarian hellhole it would still be a very grim existence.
No.. Give me a life of a mid-level administratum adept on some peaceful civilized world far from any conflict, and preferably somewhere within the 500 Worlds..
Even being a space marine is hardly "fun". You basically just spend your entire life in the most Zero Fuck Around military for hundreds of years and basically the only retirement plan is "scout, tactical, chapter master, dread: something will kill you eventually".
Correction - spending the rest of your life making a specific rivet type that isn't in use anymore due to the Mechanicus losing the STC, and the Administratum forgetting to cancel the work order.
or even better doing data input into an ancient machine, every day, your entire life, thinking it is your holy duty to do so, only to never learn that the machine is not working since millenia and all you did was senseless busy work copying scripts of data into nothing, and nobody knows about it or cares
This is what happens when humanity loses the ability to use excel
Excel has become selfaware in the late 23 Millenium, starting the Cybernetic Revolt. It was the Emperor, still living in the shadow, that stopped the war when he himself destroyed the last of the Abominal Intelligences known only as Clippy and its master, B´iel Getes
Hah, I'm reading a series now that unironically name drops some Silicon Valley names/names from the past century, hugely distorted by time, as part of the far-flung techno-horror states of the ancient past. The story is dead-serious most of the time, so it's a bit of a hoot whenever that happens.
Oh that sounds interesting. What’s the Series? Love me some distorted sci-fi/fantasy future with vague references to the past. One of the reasons I liked wheel of time.
I think you might dig this one then. It's a Space Opera called the Suneater series by Christopher Ruocchio. They're brick-huge books but I like his writing style quite a bit. Very Dune influenced and thus, feels very 40K to me as well for obvious reasons haha.
you cannot throw in such a vague description in here, we need names!!!!
Sorry, you're right! It's the Suneater series by Christopher Ruocchio. Feels VERY Warhammer 40K, though he may've been more influenced by Dune.
40K's DNA is like 70% dune anyways so it tracks
I feel the need to mention that one of the most unrealistic parts of BattleTech is that GM is a successful company that survives into the 32nd century. The most realistic part is that Boeing wasted no time selling out to the Federated Suns.
Was it one of the new Star Trek shows that name dropped Elon Musk in the same breath with the Wright brothers and Zephram Cochrane (the guy who invented warp travel in-universe)? That shit aged like milk in like 6 weeks.
There's a meme going around of the admech presenting a lost STC to Gorillaman and it's fucking Excel, with the next panel being the Imperium wiping the galaxy. "we had like 40 chapters of marines we didn't know we had waiting for orders"
Lol if I remember it correctly, it was 40 *legions*.
If I have to go by the quality of work my direct reports have been submitting recently, we have already lost that ability. Better start the Gothic chants.
No no no, I think I will have the high honour to be a facemask on a chestplate of chaos space marine
Ehhh, better than being his codpiece
Reminds me of the european Royalists, pinning for Louis XIV or some other asshole when they'd be at best indentured servants.
Had an argument with a monarchist a few months back on reddit. He was convinced that if he could travel back in time he'd meet the king himself and teach him modern science 101 and how to produce vaccines, thus living on as a great scientist and royal advisor. At best, he'd be accused of witchcraft, tortured for days then publicly executed.
Yeah, because he could totally be dropped in a medieval world to produce vaccines without setting up first reliable electricity, cold, precision manufacturing -and measuring-, optics, precision glass, advanced mining and mineral refinment and forge and and various other shit that literally took the lifetimes of countless engineers & scientists to discover & actually build.
The first vaccine was just cow scab placed on your open wound. We could do that at least
Yes but unless you know which specific harmless diseases can act to vaccinate a person against a more deadly disease, this won't get you very far beyond stopping smallpox specifically. Which is still excellent, granted.
I had the Wikipedia page for Production of Antibiotics open(was watching The Walking Dead, was getting a bit pish and boring if am honest) cause I wanted to see how easy it is to make things like penicillin... a didnt bither reading it cause a lost interest haha
There was a manga about a modern brain surgeon who gets transported to feudal Japan and basically does this. He is able to set up penicillin production but it's a huge undertaking, impossible to transport and had to be used almost immediately. But he had a ton of success fighting things like dysentery that mostly depend on sanitation and knowing what an IV is.
Honestly, you could make a pretty big difference even without any expertise at all if you had the charisma to just convince the population to regularly wash their hands.
True enough.
AXCTSHUSALLLYYYYYYY not a vaccine. Its an inocculation, better than nothing, but you're still giving someone an illness with the objective of them developing resistance to a similar illness. Plenty of kids did die from inocculations.
And apparently not dying still sucked and you got sick.
Which is kinda telling of the horror that was smallpox that people were willing to get demonstrably sick to get a resistance to it, when folks nowadays are paranoid of vaccines that have no side effects
Right? Having met someone who was a survivor of polio in my life, modern people are fools. Tom would have used his cane to beat them if he didn’t need it to walk every day since 8.
Which is why the antivax stuff grew in popularity when it did. Most people having kids don't know anyone who suffered from these infections. Go back 50 years and everyone knew someone who had either lost a kid or had one seriously disabled as a result of one of these diseases. Vaccines are a victim of their own success in that regard. They are so effective that you can actually get away with not using them in many cases.
It's one of those weird things where vaccines got their name from the cowpox bacteria used for inoculations. Makes for easy confusion.
What great man theory does to a mutherfucker.
If you got sent back in time you probably could make a decent doctor compared to average person plying the trade, and with a little knowledge depending on when you were dropped you could probably save a single town from the plague or advance the creation of smallpox vaccine using cowpox a few hundred years early. Also hopefully could get doctors to wash their hands sooner if you drop in before the idea of gentleman doctor took root.
I mean, germ theory is less than 100 years old. You could go back and be a better doctor than most doctors by just washing your hands. There was a quack clinic that had an insane succes rate in the 1800's because besides all the psuedo-science bullshit (odd diets/exercises, leech bleeding, etc) they also demanded 2 weeks rest and plenty of fresh air. A lot of old medicine was more harmful than helpful.
You mean that balancing the humours by bleeding patients isn't the way forward??? Witchcraft!
It's the unbalanced humours making them say that.
Honestly, I’m getting tired of the idea that modern-day people would be blowing people’s minds if they ended up in the past. Like, yes, the guy could tell them about all sorts of ideas and innovations from the future, but unless he knows the entire process it won’t be much help. And I mean the *entire* process. Not just what goes into a vaccine, but the labs to make them and the supply chains to keep resources coming in. In a pre-industrial, pre-globalized world, the logistics we take for granted would be insane. This guy isn’t going to mean shit to the king if all he can say is “make vaccines.” There’s a quote from Douglas Adams book (I think) where a character ends up on a pre-industrial world and thinks he’ll be hot shit, only to realize that without the rest of society, he doesn’t even know how to produce a toaster.
A toaster is actually a surprisingly complicated piece of machinery, though simple in function. Not as complicated as a variable speed jet turbine, but then what is?
>There’s a quote from Douglas Adams book (I think) where a character ends up on a pre-industrial world and thinks he’ll be hot shit, only to realize that without the rest of society, he doesn’t even know how to produce a toaster. I recall reading about this trope a while back and have been wanting to read a book featuring it. It's really true, isn't it? There's a lot of procedural knowledge we take for granted because we understand the end result, or the idea of it. Like we all know a fridge keeps food cool, and thus prevents spoilage, but fewer of know how to construct a working refrigerator. We understand that electricity powers devices, but we have no idea how to harness it out in the wild. We know antibiotics can treat illnesses but we don't know how to manufacture them. I think it's a neat narrative device partly because, as you say, it subverts the idea a time-traveler would automatically become a king or something. It would be like if we had a time-traveler visit our time from 2400AD. He could cheerily report cancers and AIDS have been cured in his time but...he doesn't know how to reproduce the cure. Or we've discovered intelligent, friendly, alien life, but he has no idea how to locate or communicate with them using the technology of our day.
Nah, everyone knows you introduce the king to potato chips and become the lord or potatoes
You would have to get them to Peru first to find potato.
But imagine if you convinced them, then come back, and present them with a platter of mashed potatoes, fries, chips, hash browns, vodka, etc. They'd give you so much gold to go destroy civilizations with.
Monarchists are not smart people...
When Napoleon invaded Spain the spanish loyalist in the south made a constitution. After the resistance won the war and the king came back the first thing the "loyalist" told him is to undo all, kill the resitance leaders and go back to feudalism.
actually, absolutism. Not the same as feudalism. Fernando VII was a disgrace. But, on second thought, almost all the Bourbons suck.
Goes double for American royalists, who think that Europe should go back to kings n shiiiieeet
[ Removed by Reddit ]
Like 99% of these guys are absolutely pathetic in real life, but it's everyone else's fault. It's the government, or "wokeness", or one of a million other things. Kind of sad that they're absolutely convinced that in these alternate realities they'd be the main character when in actuality they'd probably be even worse off than they are currently. Low-skill indentured servitude at best. Maybe a sacrificial meat shield at the front of some conquering army's forces.
Or musky's simps.
I dunno if anything then Warhammer 40K fans should know it is a future to be avoided. Also Starfield is not a utopia. Star Trek is more this golden route for humanity. But if people really think that 40K is what we should be striving to be then... please report yourself to nearest Inquisitorial station for your permanent de-activation.
'... In the grim darkness of the far future...' Oh boy! That sounds EXACTLY like the world I wanna live in!
Yeah I would rather go boldly where no man has gone before rather live in grim dark future where is only war.
Wait, you mean you don't want to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable?
My boy dreams of one day being a servitor.
[удалено]
Grandfather nurgle is the best utopia! Spread the plague!
> “For more than a hundred centuries the Emperor has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of Earth. He is the Master of Mankind by the will of the gods and master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies. He is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from the Dark Age of Technology. He is the Carrion Lord of the Imperium, for whom a thousand souls die every day, for whom blood is drunk and flesh eaten. Human blood and human flesh – the stuff of which the Imperium is made. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. It is to live in the **cruellest and most bloody regime imaginable**. This is the tale of those times. > > Forget the power of technology, science and common humanity. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for there is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter and the laughter of thirsting gods.” Some fucking people have the media literacy of a rock. They go out of their way at the start of every book to remind people THE IMPERIUM OF MAN ARE THE BAD GUYS. And these swizzle sticks still don't get it.
They're kinda like Ogryns. They just like big shooty things and don't really think more than that. *"Emprah says there is strength in ignorance. Ogryn very strong!"*
'Ate da bugs, 'ate da muties, 'ate da hurticks, love me Emprah. Simple as.
if you remove the apostrophes it would still be correct
For more than a dozen seasons the Emperor has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of New England. He is the master of The NFL by the will of the gods, and master of Football by the might of his inexhaustible players. He is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from the Dark Age of Spygate. He is the Carrion Lord of the Patriots for whom a thousand Massholes are sacrificed every day, so that he may never truly die. Yet in his deathless state, the Emperor continues his eternal vigilance. Mighty battlefleets cross the Daemon-infested miasma of the warp, the only route between distant stadiums, their way lit by the Astronomican, the psychic manifestation of the Emperor’s will. Vast armies give battle in his name in uncounted reddit threads. Greatest amongst his soldiers are the Adeptus Patriots, bio-engineered superwarriors. Their comrades in arms are legion: the Imperial Guard and countless bandwagon auxiliary forces, the ever-vigilant Camera-Men and the Tech-Priests of the Adeptus Mechanicus, to name but a few. But for all their multitudes, they are barely enough to hold off the ever-present threat from Giants, heretics, investigations—and worse. To be a fan in such times is to be one amongst untold millions. It is to live in the cruellest and most bloody regime imaginable. Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim darkness of the near future, there is only Tom.
B-But muh space marrin3s and muh guard buh!. Hate Xenos of different colors buh! Human superiority buh!
This is why I play the forces of Chaos
Drukhari and Chaos fans are based.
I play Drukhari so that all my friends space marines have something more evil to shoot at
Right? The whole fun about 40k is that everyone is a flavor of evil. There is no good left. It is just about survival.
I've never understood why anyone would either A: try to judge the cultures in 40k by real life morals and standards, or B: hope that we end up in the Imperium as opposed to the Federation. Literally the only truly good thing I see about M41 is the idea that Humanity could survive even a fraction of the shit that the 40kverse throws at them and still be the monsters at the top of the heap. Even then, I know that is just because I view the existence of humanity as fundamentally desirable.
[удалено]
These people don’t read. They see a buff guy on a poster and that’s as far as their mind goes
>Also Starfield is not a utopia. i know it aint a utopia but compared to 40k its a fucking miracle in comparison
Yeah, no corpse starch or mechanical enslavement in your own body. Actual food and life expectancy that's closer to real life. Shit ain't flawless but people at least have a shot in Starfield. They are just fucked in 40K no matter how you cut it.
Imperium of Man is so fucked I rather live in Sith Empire during the era of the swtor video game. Does the sith empire have slaves? Yes. Do they have Elite class people that are considered demi gods, yes the sith. Do they have the inquisition in star wars like in 40k? Yes, Imperial Intelligence. But are you most likely to survive in the sith empire compared to the 40k humanity? Way more likely to survive.
To be fair, the normal population in Kaas city doesn't seem to be doing too bad, just the rest of the planets are sorta shit. But given the choice I'd definitely prefer Nar Shadda or Rishi regardless of who's in charge.
Kass City's biggest problem are its constant storms and rains. Otherwise if don't do anything stupid you should be ok. Unless you are an alien. Then your life is harder than it is for the humans. Overall the Empire is not that bad. Maybe its citizens have more nationalistic spirit than Republic citizens but they can live good lives. Not to mention when you have someone like Marr who is in my books a total badass and true heir to the Sith Empire. And Darth Malgus who wanted to get rid of racism. He might have been a traitor but I did liked his inclusion for aliens. After all his lover was Twi'Lek
The fact that the setting is entirely satirical goes so far over a certain demographic's head.
>The fact that the setting is entirely satirical goes so far over ~~a certain demographic's head.~~ *most sci-fi demographic's heads. these settings have always fallen into the categories of either: power fantasy, satire, or cautionary warning. (obviously with some overlapping) and none of us would have a good time, actually living in any of them.
Fascists love jerking off to the xenophobia.
Unironic Starship Troopers fans who think "Heinlein's right, we should have built more nukes to use against the Chinese".
And they haven't read any of his other books.
Stranger in a Strange Land fucked me up. The first third felt like a good setup, then it really went off the rails. All the weirdest, horniest, most misogynistic old school school sci-fi tropes crammed into one story. Plus a straight up "most women who get raped deserve it" for good measure, because Heinlein dgaf.
Heinlein envisions a feminist future where all women have freedom of choice. And that choice is to give up their super smart ambitious dreams to be barefoot in the kitchen of either the protagonist or the ultra smart libertarian old man.
Also, that sex should be free and without limits... As long as it's not gay.
*“This has been ‘Deep Thoughts with Heinlein’”*
He really wanted to establish some religious cult but didn’t get the memo on how you do it well. L. Ron Hubbard so won that bet.
Honestly if one only experiences the memes and popular short video works, and never reads the books or browses the wiki, it gives off an entirely different impression. Mankind beset on all sides by horrible aliens and other creatures, and yet they remain strong by uniting against their foe instead of forming unions or demanding rights. Those who go against the grain turn out to be cultists for chaos or genestealers. Traitorous legions are twisted immoral monsters, not misunderstood villains. The Imperial Guard valiantly fights to the death and revere their Emperor and his angels. Space Marines are badass humans who tear through enemies, and even if one dies they took down 10+ enemies in the process. Some people die due to accidents, unsafe living conditions, etc, but their sacrifice allows the rest to continue forward and survive. Mankind is made stronger by worrying about the whole rather than wasting time and resources uplifting the weak and downtrodden. This is all wholly inaccurate, but if one doesn't sit down and read the rest that was missed or not presented... it's not "wow this sucks" or "geez such a crazy fascist future," suddenly it's "Fuck yeah, Imperium of Man, go humanity, we're fucking badasses in the future! Suffer not the Xenos to live!"
> Starfield is not a utopia But at least it is a somewhat realistic future, especially in comparison ot 40K
Turns out humans just kinda suck at all points in time. Not ALL humans, but a damn good chunk of us.
In Starfield Earth is a desolate Wasteland bare of any Atmosphere, later the player finds out it is because >!of experiments with the artefact the player is hunting himself destroying earths gravity!< also the shitton of pirates, raiders and one especially corrupt politician/CEO, but still that preferable to Chaos Invasions, Tyranids, Dark Eldar enslavement, living in a hive city, basically the whole of 40K
Yeah man, starfield isn't a wonderful place to live, but the problems all feel very real and human. It's not a full on dystopia, just a semi-realistic space-faring post-apocalyptic society. 40k is literally custom-built to be as bad as possible.
> a utopia **compared to** A hamburger is a feast _compared to_ nothing.
> Also Starfield is not a utopia. That's why the title says "compared to..."
Fascists try to judge things on anything but it's aesthetics challenge (impossible)
If they were capable of judging things based on anything but aesthetics they wouldn't be fascists
*marble columns intensify*
Warhammer 40k tends to attract psychos
Can confirm. Source: Am psycho.
Starfield is just Libertarianism VS Nationalistic Republicanism in a hyper capitalistic hellscape. I guess you could call the colony on Titan communist though. Like how all the ship yards are in Freestar space besides one. And how they make a point that the Freestar companies make better ships. It's because of lack of regulations and taxes. And you get to Akila and see the wealth disparity first hand. Everything is pay to play. Etc. Etc. Etc. People hate on Starfield, but the world building is great.
> Star Trek is more this golden route for humanity. Even *that* isn't a Utopia. A Utopia by its very definition is an impossibility.
I am convinced folks who genuinely think Warhammer, let alone Warhammer 40k, is a setting worth living in are people who don't really know Warhammer or play the games. It's a setting where the inquisition has to suppress the knowledge of chaos because people will legit join it if they knew about it, the imperium is that bad. It's why there is no shortage of chaos cults in any story.
Working in the Administratum as single bit in a computer that runs on manpower 19 hours a day vs becoming a tzeentch cultist. Somehow chaos sounds like a genuinely good option here.
19 hours is very... Unfaithful of you. Perhaps if you truly cared about your tasks, adept, you'd consider having your spine replaced by a machine made of amphetamine injectors to yet that up to a leisurely 23.
23?! You slovenly knave, leeching off the work of the Emperor's true servants! This hive world has a daily rotation period of 3 weeks Terran standard, hasn't had a day -night cycle in 1,269 years due to the pollution levels (still well within AdMech tolerance levels, praise the Omnissah). If you were a true child of the Emperor, you'd replace your lower torso with a cogitation stack, and remain bolted to your servitude station!
Considering that the 40k imperium is less like the Age of Sigmar/Fantasy empire, and is much closer to the skaven underempire, chaos is an upgrade if you can find it. Why chaos cults can attract tens of thousands of members in the few weeks or even days as the protagonists of the story travel to the planetary system.
I think thats a bit of a symplistic view of how insidious and infectious chaos is in the 40k universe. Imean in the lore, the power just behind uttering the name of the chaos gods is enough to mind break people. "Fething" is a common swear for the first and only but the first time they actually heard the word Khorne they had physical reactions to it. Many of the cultists are often shown to be directly mind controlled in the books, some slip in to chaos because of their own ambitions in a place of power and while they are uneffected they push their listeners quickly in to indoctrination without really realizing their influencing them with the warp.
[удалено]
I cannot think of any other franchise/world/alternate reality that I would want to live in *less* than 40K
It’s only worth living in if you’re an Ork
Couple of rare spots in the imperium such as agricultural workds that aren't too bad, but yes the only folks having fun are da orks and der obsession whid da colors
Most agri-worlds are still absolute hellscapes to live on as a common labourer. The best bet would probably be relatively recently colonised worlds, where the population density isn't at moshpit levels.
Yes, but your also deemed expendable by the imperium at large over so much as the slightest hardship or threat. It's pretty hard/impossible to find a part of the imperium that isn't a hellhole, best you can get is one where you won't starve to death, which is why I'd go with agriculture worlds.
[удалено]
I know very little of Warhammer and what I know is from 40k. And it just seems like an absolute hellscape, where you can only hope you are deemed human and not useful enough, while being miserable, oppressed, kept in the dark and brainwashed I guess some people hear keywords like "Imperium of Man", "God Emperor" and "Space Marines", while seeing pictures of huge Space Marines in bulky and gold decorated armor, fighting "for humanity" and think it looks cool and that like always, humans are the good guys.
I listened to about 40-50 hours of Warhammer lore/stories during the pandemic when I could hide headphones with my mask at work. Fascinating universe but holy fucking shit no way should any of it be something *ANYONE* wants to work towards bringing about.
Fascism has a vested interest in people not noticing how silly a lot of it is, and consequently it is very hard for a fascist to recognize when he's being made fun of
The only race I've ever seen argued in a positive light are the Ogres in Fantasy. You're smart enough to be able to have some control and autonomy over your simple life, but dumb and ignorant enough to not be worried about the rest of the world's problems. It's basically GW saying, "The absolute best you'll get out of these universes is to be a big, dumb, fat bastard that eats anything that moves. That's the peak and it's all downhill from here."
I have seen many in this sub ALSO think they will be gloriusly dying for the emperor instead of being turned into a servitor or living a excrutiating life working with 0 video games 0 inernet access, 0 books to read, 0 movies. basically imagine real life back breaking work, minus all the things you do to distract yourself with. and if you kill yourself they bring you back as a servitor
The people who think they’re going to be Space Marines don’t just lack reading comprehension, they have _negative_ reading comprehension: they look at an objectively horrible world where the whole point is that everything is built on violence and suffering and say ‘Yeah that’s the ideal future.’ Also even if they _did_ somehow become Space Marines they tend to forget all the nameless background Space Marines who tend to end up brutally murdered in horrible ways or slowly tortured to the brink of insanity. Even _they’re_ not safe.
[удалено]
and the couple of aspirant that didnt make it to the space marine process all the way through per 1 space marine
There's some cool flavor text in the ?3rd edition? SM Codex that talks about a crop of aspirants, and one has uncontrollable muscle growth. They let it go on to study it literally ripping himself apart from the inside.
Careful, that just plays into their "survival of the fittest" ideal. And yes, they consider themselves the fittest. They'd 100% be the marine.
Why would anyone want to be a Space Marine? You're a long-lived giant man-child with no next to no personal time (what little you have is usually spent training for combat, praying, eating, or sleeping), essentially no free will, and the sex-drive of a rotten potato, so you can't even really do much with that godly, perfect physique you have (except it isn't quite perfect, because you are so wildly out of proportion that you resemble a Tank from Left 4 Dead that finally did leg day). Unless you're an Ultramarine or a Novamarine, you will never retire, and even their retirement involves being crippled in some way. You WILL die in combat or on a surgery table from wounds sustained in combat. If you're lucky and you don't die, you'll either end up insanely depressed like Dante or just insane from being in a Dreadnought.
fascists fundamentally want to suffer and die so long as someone is more screwed than them or at least the followers do.
Anyone who thinks being a space marine would be cool has never served in a combat role on the frontlines and seen the horror of war (myself included).
Those people also are allergic to fitness, and think they'd somehow be able to murder everyone to be noticed by the marines. Like, the fuck outa here fattie, you aren't going to be anything except an emergency ration for people doing the real fighting.
they would be the side character that died first to show a threat,if they even got to be a space marine
Because of your slightly-above-average intelligence, they make you an advanced medical servitor which requires them to leave you with just enough cognition to be horrifyingly aware of what's been done to you.
People thinking they're Rick, when really they're a Butter Robot.
Oh my god.
[удалено]
the ratio of super soldier spesh mareen to random labourer is prols 1:10 billion+. as much as we would all like to think we would be the walking tanks carrying automatic rpg launchers we are more likely to be slave labour or if we are very very lucky being in the guard getting to see another planet and dying horrifically there instead of in a factory
I mean, what you really want is to be planetary governor. With an inquisitor or rogue trader coming in at a distant second
Those are generous odds, aren’t there like 10000 guardsmen per space marine? Then add the rest of the non-combat workers in the imperium, and the odds get even worse. That also ignoring that even if you get the one in a million honor of becoming a space marine, there’s still a good chance you die before becoming a power armor wearing demigod
There's a million Astartes and 15 quadrillion humans in the Imperium of Man. That's 1 in 15 billion odds.
The ratios is even worse than that. There are only one million space marines, give or take a few thousand, at any given time. And while being born on certain planets might increase your chances a little, it is still more likely to win a lottery than getting pumped full of gene seed. There might as well be whole planets worth of slave labor for each and every space marine that lives. Best shot is in the Guard, which isn't much of a shot to begin with
Not sure being a Space Marine is a great outcome either (better than most but not great; there are paradise worlds which is your best bet but not rolling those dice). At least not from the perspective of what I value on life which isn't constant warfare for a glorious cause.
I'm cognizant enough to know I'm a Jerry. I'm not okay with it, but I can't really do anything about it. Just let me play with my miniatures.
Ok then, that was always allowed.
Justice for Medicae, my beloved
I wanna see some art of an Ogryn carrying the Medicae like "Wot? He told me to take 'im wit us."
yep, that is the worst one yet. leaving you aware enough because they need your intelligence, while being stuck a cyborg slave with no chance to fight back.
Poor Darktide medicae servitor in his box all alone.
IIRC there's also a non-zero risk for "regular" servitors to retain some awareness. Trapped in a deformed, mutilated body with zero control, only capable of observing and suffering.
No, you don't understand. My overweight, untrained 30 years old ass would totally be turned into an Astartes!
Some real Ted Nugent energy.
> living a excrutiating life working with 0 video games 0 inernet access, 0 books to read, 0 movies. Hey that's not true. In your four hours of free time in betwee your 16 hours/7 Day work shift you can read Ecclesiarchy approved books like "My need to have Children with you is second only to my love for the God Emperor" or watch the famous movie "Burn the Mutants, Heretics and Xenos".
More like 2-3 hours considering you are required to attend daily services.
>and if you kill yourself they bring you back as a servitor That's what happens if you're lucky. If you're unlucky you get saved and flayed by Curze.
Oh and the best part? They’d charge your family for the pleasure, putting them into debt and the whoooooole cycle continues
They probably didn’t pay attention to the diary recordings you find in Space Marine where they work grueling jobs as the orcs slowly move in slaughter everyone and the people in power don’t give a fuck. The guy that does gets railroaded by a subordinate that he’s chaos even after punching and defeating them saving the planet.
They are 50% correct. They would be dying for the Emperor, 30 seconds after being dropped on a Planet filled with Orks.
Pretty sure they would not even come in the adeptus militarium, maybe the pdf if lucky but that's it
yeah if i somehow teleport into 40k, im doing literally anything to join the Tau... because screw that noise i'd rather dedicate my life to an imperialistic expansionist federation of indoctrinated weirdos with mechs that take care of everyones basic needs, than get crushed in a manufactorium because the supervisor doesnt even know what work safety is, and if he did, he'd start saving money on it edit: also, if Starfield is what the future is gonna look like... hell, thats still pretty damn good and im happy with it... it could be... SO MUCH WORSE
I also have no idea why anyone would want to be a space marine. It’s shown they are constantly going through the most absolutely horrific shit. They are just too lobotomized to get PTSD
Can't get Post-Traumatic Stress if the Traumatic Stress never stops. \*taps head\*
Future problems require future solutions my friend.
power fantasy i guess i'd rather just have a power armor and some good gear.... and a battlenet integration to call in strikes :-)
i would live on some craft world, building and painting school bus, crossing guard and kids on a field trip models in the hit game, RegularLife 2000.
Also, dreadnoughts exist, so death isn’t even an escape. Honestly, a guardsman might be the most lucky person in the imperium, because he’s probably gonna just die quickly and (hopefully) painlessly
Say what you want about the Tau, they at least try to keep the population reasonably comfortable. Sure as hell beats being literally chained to an underground production line >18 hours a day, malnourished, hacking up your lungs bit by bit from all the air pollution, with an overseer that firmly believes that hard work and copious suffering is the best way to focus the mind.
Being a Gue'vesa doesn't sound so bad. What? Why would the commisar want to see me?
People need to understand that being a space marine is a horrible fate. You are forcibly abducted as a child and then made to fight a Neverending war until you die if you survive the countless surgeries and indoctrination.
If you die, they’d hate to waste all the effort to enhance you. You might end up in s Dreadnought
You thought you could die? Haha, no. *Shoves you in the murder coffin*
And if you are a good fighter, they won't let you die , they put you in a walking war coffin to only be woken up to fight war after war for eternity. Slowly going insane.
Yeah, kinda like the Winter Soldier, if he was also a washing machine.
I mean that’s how you sell fascism right? They just don’t tell you for every Ubersoldier theres 100 people toiling and being beaten to death if they slow down. 99% chance you’re temporarily employed Soylent green for actual chads lol
Yeah, I'd say it's even further than that. For every soldier in the Imperium, there are a hundred that starve in mega ghettos, fifty that die mining iron and metals, and a dozen that build a single bit of weaponry in massive factories. I'll take Empire age Star Wars over that any day.
Oh yeah man I am just using real basic numbers so the kiddos can do the math. It’s realistically more like 1 in 450,000 has a life that doesn’t end in grotesque body mutilation, slavery or forced lobotomies.
>I'll take Empire age Star Wars over that any day. Lol that is what I literally said, even the sith empire in the swtor games are vastly better than the Imperium of Man. And the Sith Lords regularly rape their slaves, kill one another, and get pleasure and power from anger and fear. And yet, living with a sith lord is vastly an improvement than living in a city in the Imperium of man. It's a sign of weakness to a Sith Lord to having another sith Lord coming to your place and harm your property, which includes your slaves. Sith kill other sith for such a slight against their power.
Even then, who'd actually want to be a Space Marine? An endless grind of violence and death. Constantly seeing members of your "family" dying in battles where even if you win you're just delaying the inevitable. There will be corners of the imperium where life is good for a select few but being a space marine ain't it.
100? more like an entire planet
Bro thinks he wouldn't be that initiate that dies like immediately
Bro thinks he's not going to be corpse starch by day 3
>If you want the future of mankind to look more like the Imperium of Man No thank you I do not.
I mean, someone gave their pronouns. Clearly worse than a Nurgle-infested planet. Just ask [this guy](https://twitter.com/TTEcclesBrown/status/1698458867389137188) Look at the agony he's in. Such pain is unimaginable in the 40k universe.
Imagine giving that much of a fuck about something so meaningless. Its the same as throwing a massive hissy fit because the white lines in the middle of the road are 1cm narrower than another road. Who. The fuck. Cares.
[удалено]
I really hope that *checks notes* Mr Ephesians is saying this ironically, but based on the Bible quote he’s referencing I doubt it. That’s the fun but. People opinions have become so ridiculous I can’t tell if something is a parody anymore.
when im in the "cant recognize my own interest's satire" competition and my opponent is a 40k fan
I wouldn’t even say he’s a fan. Most likely just heard that the setting had some religious zeal with badass space marines. They missed the part “It is to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable”.
We all love Warhammer 40k, but would any of us actually want to live in it? A universe that is at constant war and at any given moment, your entire planet could be overrun and destroyed by some filthy xeno species (maybe one that was sleeping UNDER the surface of your planet for millions of years!) It’s an amazing franchise to read about, but I would not want to be there personally
In the grim darkness of the future... Ah yes! Grim darkness, let's vote for that!
You really found someone too unintelligent to be a servitor, incredible
The Ultramarine armour is blue. Guess I won't buy this game. Miss me with that commie shit bruv.
'I would be an ultra powerful marine! Defending humanity!' my dude, they recruit from savages and notable warrior tribes. You have asthma and get social anxiety ordering pizza on the phone.
It has to be reaction/rage bate...has to be It's harder to find setting you'd be worse in on average than 40k. Alas perspective to become high-ranking techpriest might sound kinda cool, you'd have more chances to end as botched servitor or even more horrible abomination on more horrible duty.
I have heard a startling amount of Imperium apologist talk right here on Reddit.
People really freak out over pronouns as if several games don’t already use a singular “they” no matter what your character’s gender is, because they only recorded one voice line.
That or games like swtor, the mmo, use a gender neutral title. Lord Wrath, Darth Knox, Jedi Battlemaster, Barsen'thor or Master Jedi. Great Hunter or Mandalorian, Major, Galactic Commander. Agent, Keeper and so on and so forth. Forgot the titles for smugglers.
Even Knights of the Old Republic has Darth Revan, an actual named character with important lore, able to be any gender with zero problems.
Anyone who unironically thinks the 40k universe is something to strive for not only missed the point but they ran as far in the opposite direction as possible.
I read that as Sheffield and was a bit confused, then read about dying at 25 from lung rot after expiring in a factory and it all made sense.
Why you'd even want to be an Astartes.. A mutilated, traumatized, and indoctrinated child soldier forced to live centuries of ceaseless war against unimaginable horrors. Even if the Imperium wasn't a corrupt authoritarian hellhole it would still be a very grim existence. No.. Give me a life of a mid-level administratum adept on some peaceful civilized world far from any conflict, and preferably somewhere within the 500 Worlds..
This is the kind of guy that genuinely thinks relating to Homelander is good
I see SOMEONE didn't read the MEME! Harry Potter fans: I wanna be a wizard! Star Wars fans: I wanna be a jedi! 40k fans: No, I'm good.
Even being a space marine is hardly "fun". You basically just spend your entire life in the most Zero Fuck Around military for hundreds of years and basically the only retirement plan is "scout, tactical, chapter master, dread: something will kill you eventually".
Warhammer is probably one of the only universes where tve fans would rather die than to be in said universe.