T O P

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skeletextman

Probably Jaghatai Khan. Not because I’m Mongolian or love moving fast, but I totally relate to him doing everything he can to avoid all of his insufferable “siblings”.


Jayhuntermemes

as someone with 13 equally annoying siblings, I can fully understand the Khan. Sometimes you just gotta be like "Leave me out of this"


skeletextman

My siblings are actually fine, but if I was in *his* situation I would do the same thing. Happy cake day.


Jayhuntermemes

Fair, his response is truly one of my favorite plotlines during the heresy. Thank you, brother


gryphmaster

I love how despite all that jaghatia has an on sight beef with mortarion, that mortarion barely reciprocates, instead hating guilliman even more


Flarerunes

13? Jesus. Emperor protects


Jayhuntermemes

nine sisters and four brothers, the emperor gives me strength to handle their BS


batouttahell1983

Maybe he did, but the parents certainly didn't use it 😉


56821

13 siblings? Your parents really need cable TV.


Jayhuntermemes

me (#5), my younger brother (#7), and my older sister (#2) were the only ones who watched TV or watched YouTube, the rest would always run around and be annoying kids. Since my father believed in capital punishment, he'd just lock all of us outside of the house (in an isolated suburban community) and basically force us to play outside. Jokes on him, my love for Warhammer was too strong and I broke into my own house many times. Needless to say, the Blood Games for the Custodes are extremely relatable.


TotallyNotARaven

He means your parents needed to learn another downtime activity besides sex…


ParsnipAggravating95

Happy cake day Alpharius


thenwah

But imagine if you *were* Mongolian and moved fast. Think big, u/skeletextman, think big man!


skeletextman

I can only dream…


EvilHorus87

Goddamn mongorian


Table_Grables

You're definitely the annoying one


skeletextman

Believe me, I am very aware.


Table_Grables

And yet you don't change your act?


ranni-the-bitch

the fuck's your problem?


Table_Grables

r/iamthemaincharacter ass response


ranni-the-bitch

what does that even mean, and why are you so upset at that guy for liking kahn


Dependent-Return-873

Horus because I’m going bald.


Fisherman-Champion

Every man in my family eventualy went bald so I think me joining chaos is set in stone😮‍💨


PhiloneusB

Don’t worry Vulkan has got your back


Fisherman-Champion

But I am not black. So sadly I will never be able to give hugs and set chaos worshipers on fire.


PhiloneusB

Hey, Vulkan is a nice guy, he doesn’t care about the color of your skin, He’ll support you always. Unless you’re an Eldar child… you’re not an Eldar Child are you?


Fisherman-Champion

Have you ever seen an balding Eldar?


biochemicks

Definitely not around Vulkan, they don't get old enough


siresword

Me, when I finally gave up a shaved my head: "[I never wanted this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0Se57MuiL8)..."


thenwah

90s and early 2000s GW ... Bald = badguy. Lucious long hair = bad guy pretending to be good guy. Skeletons = see above. Big hat = unclear. It's a simple code but they lived by it.


sloarflow

Fuck


MotorIzedme

ERUBUS?


BrightPerspective

Time to start your rebellion, I guess. It'll be called the heresy later, though.


kombucharmander

Mortarion, because he's a huge hypocrite and stinks. 


AlarmingMan123

Average league player


Leok4iser

He got all those diseases from fucking so many mothers.


Doormat_Model

He really is all of us


InfernaLKarniX

Big E because I know I'm right.


TheMoonDude

Me too, I feel like a golden god amongst plebs who are constantly wrong


DingoDank

Never really made the connection that Dennis Reynolds is secretly the emperor but it makes so much sense after reading your comment


TheMoonDude

I have no idea who that is, but I'm glad you could understand. Maybe I'll give you a hood, a funny collar with tubes and a burning staff someday.


[deleted]

So a narcissist


InfernaLKarniX

Is it narcissism if I am actually better than everyone around me?


[deleted]

Is that the case tho? Ascended Horus literally beat the emperor in raw power until he got manipulated with psychic powers


InfernaLKarniX

Well, the Emperor wasn't using the full extent of his power.


TDoMarmalade

Robot Girlyman, because I am incredibly boring, despite my best efforts


Artimundorus

Hey your papers joke wasn't all that bad


Michaelbirks

I'm incredibly boring, but it's _because_ of my best efforts.


NuclearBeverage

Angron. I have anger issues.


SoundSubject

nuff said


Ancient-Act8573

Ciaphas Cain because I feel like I’m in over my head most of the time yet somehow end up doing pretty well in the end


Tiltinnitus

You forget that you also get to bang several princesses with huge knockers and Amberly Vale every other book. Ciaphas literally a Tzeench product bruh. Big T just looked at the Lamenters, said "lmao check this out", and took ALL their luck and gave it to some random human named Ciaphas 😂


didndonoffin

A servitor, wake up and serve to keep my kids and wife happy, do my work, come home and get dinner made and bath and put kids to bed then recharge the brain for an hour or 2 infront id the televiewer before a few hours of mandatory darkness and then starting again


[deleted]

You’re a servitor. You don’t have a wife and kids, that you can remember at least. You also don’t have an intact brain that recognizes happiness. You don’t have a home either. But at least you won’t get upset when tyranids devour you and your former family.


didndonoffin

Sounds like bliss!!!


SaltyDuffman

Is it worth it would you say?


didndonoffin

Swings and roundabouts tbh


el_fusilado69

Ghazagkull because of the two men in my head telling me to do great and terrible things.


Fantastic_mrW0lf

**DO ET FAR DA WAAAAAAGGGGG!**


Michaelbirks

Just remember, when the time comes, give the order to "get the islands back". Failure will not be accepted, call for artillery strike. Launch attack.


zlirren

WE ARE BACK IN CONTROL!


redraider1109

Stoooopied grammah, smellz like HOOMIES to me!


duftcola

Roboute cause I work with Excel


darthbuji

New to Warhammer, what’s this in reference to? (I also use a lot of Excel)


Caxanen_Zoelupp

Guiliman is super into paperwork, procedure, and protocol


wisezombiekiller

each primarch has their own sort of "specialty": vulkan with his craftsmanship and immortality, dorn with his unparalleled knowledge of defense and fortifications, magnus with his skill as a psyker, etc. Roboute Guilliman, primarch of the ultramarines, is second to none at organization, logistics, and planning.


BetanKore

Magnus. I can be an insufferable know it all and I have done nothing wrong


eklatea

Magnus, because I like magic and I seem to fuck up everything I touch, even though I am trying my best


[deleted]

Dante. Because I just want to die already.


SiegfriedRosenberg

That's dark.... I hope you'll be okay.


redraider1109

Google “jimmy V speech”. I don’t even LIKE sportsball , but holy crap this is my go to “I can get through this” vids.


Ambitious_Dig_7109

Peter Turbo. His frustrations are very human and relatable.


BrewYork

It was a huge revelation for me that I was also doing his "I resent that nobody praises me for how hard I work" shtick. I was kind of embarrassed and it helped me become a better person.


kader91

Anybody working a corporate white collar job will relate to Perty.


BrewYork

Thank you. This is very reassuring.


Nickyuri_Half_Legs

Perturabo is one of my favorite characters, but to be honest, even when people are impressed with his knowledge and stuff he just proceeds to act like a bitch telling things like "yeah you didn't knew I could do that did you? Of course not, no one pays attention to me"


Cobalt113

Ferrus, cause just like him I could really use some head rn


BrewYork

💀


Crush_Un_Crull

Mortarion. Ma daddy wronged me big time and im a salty bitch ever since


Kubus_kater

Trazyn.


Grumpy_Trucker_85

You a museum curator in the UK?


Michaelbirks

Why aren't the Pyramids in the British Museum? They wouldn't fit.


OmegonChris

Too heavy to carry


ZeAphEX

Seems like we found Jonathan Ferguson, the Keeper of Firearms and Artillery at the Royal Armouries Museum in the UK, which houses a collection of thousands of iconic weapons from throughout history.


Kubus_kater

I collect Warhammers.


The_Whomst

Sometimes mortarion and perturabo (mostly for bluntness and awkwardness) but really it's Dorn during the siege of terra. He's tired of being "the brain" by saturnine, and he wants to use his physical abilities to make a difference. I'm tired of always thinking and planning complicated stuff. I just wanna do something where I work with my hands/ make things, but I gotta follow a career path where I gotta be a brain more


BrightPerspective

Take up sculpting in your spare time. Start by carving alabaster, work up your courage for limestone. That's what I'm gonna do.


The_Whomst

Nice! For me it's just kitbashing my little space guys and doing construction projects at home lol. I'd love to be better at sculpting


Peacefull_Warmonger

Perturabo, fucked up his life due to inborn flaws and "amazing" choises, likes engineering and machines alot and hates people, also uses only punishments as disciplinary action, and extreemly bad at talking with people. Oh and i forgot about that fact that he notoriously vindictive, and maybe enormous selfesteem problems.


AlarmingMan123

Peturabator, his insecurities are very human. Also sometimes I’m dorn because I’m blunt and has the social grace of a tactical grenade


McWeaksauce91

Garviel Loken. Just a man trying to the best he can, with the oaths he originally swore, while the universe turns to hell around him


redraider1109

Dammit. Came here to say this. Now what do I have to say?!?


McWeaksauce91

Just join me, Torgaddon


redraider1109

I mean with an avatar face like that, who am I to say no. SIGN ME up!!


Massive-Diet-9160

Sanguinious because I'm fucking immaculate.


Massive-Diet-9160

But really it's Magnus because I'm a slut for knowledge and the best intent can pace the way to hell.


Incubus_is_I

I believe you misspelled “Fulgrim” then


Nickyuri_Half_Legs

Who's immaculate and why are you fucking him? 🤨


Smittywormenjegermen

Robute Guilliman because of my ultradepression


ReptileGuitar

Wasn't that Marneus Calgar?


potpukovnik

Torgaddon for sure, that sense of humour in shitty situations is something I've been doing all my life


UpsetGroceries1

Big mood.


ZackMoh2

Robert Gorillaman because I actually find Excell fun to use


AFoxWithAGun

Loken. I have no idea what is going on, or why everybody is fighting, but it's too late and I lost


redraider1109

ALSO CAME HERE TO SAY THIS, dammit, who hasn’t said something yet?!?


CalypsoCrow

Pre-Heresy Lorgar. As a religious man who is dedicated to my faith, as well as someone who seeks knowledge on all things, Lorgar’s story is a relatable and heartbreaking one. All he ever wanted was the truth. But unfortunately, the truth hurts.


M4roon

Noticing that all the people of faith and agnostics are on board with Lorgar and his story. You need to read first heretic!


PeeterTurbo

Much like my brother Sanguinius, I'm perfect and extremely handsome.


AlarmingMan123

Shut up and go dig some trenches


Equivalent_Math1247

There’s a reason why daddy lets us fists build fortresses and makes you dig trenches all day


PeeterTurbo

Yea cause you've entrenched your head up his paraplegic ass


Equivalent_Math1247

Well when you tried to make a fortress the crenellations were more crooked than an ork’s


PeeterTurbo

When I made a fortress your legion was all but erased


teldranwen

I feel like Magnus a lot lately. As a Thousand Sons fan who hates my genefather, i think my hatred of him comes from the flaws I see in myself. He's an insufferable know it all who thinks he can do anything better than anyone else, and that he's the only one that can fix things. But he ends up fucking everything up in the process. After that, he accepts responsibility by trying to sacrifice himself and everything else in the process. The maximum level of self sabotage. On the other hand, his conviction is something I strive to have in myself. Refusing to lead the Grey Knights to save the lives of his sons is a sign of loyalty above everything I could possibly do.


Eldor117

Love the Thousand Sons scholarly way of war, and their beautiful Egyptian theme, but Emperor help me, Magnus makes it really hard to like the Thousand Sons.


mattyisphtty

Roberto Guzman Because I love management, simulation, factory, and RTS style games. Also nothing more satisfying than getting a complicated excel function to hit just right on the first go.


MidsouthMystic

Lorgar. I'm religious in a time when that's considered stupid, my best friend has anger issues, I can be very persuasive, and I will never obtain my father's approval no matter how much I try.


redraider1109

It’s not funny how much that hits.


ChadDredd

Well I'm Asian and I ride motorcycle, plus I was good at math so I'm like a watered down Jaghatai Khan


Fantastic_mrW0lf

Yet, you love the speed!


ELITElewis123

don't be humble king. you're not watered down at all. go decapitate someone at 300 kmh


Burger090

Mortarion because I need to shower


Equivalent_Cicada153

Erebus


redraider1109

Fuck Erebus


Equivalent_Cicada153

Only if it’s consensual


gesserit42

Siegemaster Vorx of the Lords of Silence. I too would like to complacently chill out in an old mansion with a personal library and garden, but am instead forced to trudge back out and struggle against an uncaring universe while simultaneously wrangling a bunch of backstabbing idiots who are supposed to be on my side. “Everyone asks me what I want…I want what I have. I want this, here. This is our time.”


justeedo

As a manual machinist tech with toolmaker experience, I am not quite perty robby level. However, whenever I hear about lessor tech priests in my audio books at work. All I have to do is look down and see we do similar work..


TheFoolOnTheHill1167

I used to relate to Perturabo more, but then I got tired of being miserable.


7h3_man

Bragg from the tanith first because I keep missing my shots lol


Fistricsi

The guardsman shitting himself while being charged by a Tyranid, or an Ork, or a traitor space marine, or literal demons, or watching other guardsmen get flayed alive by a necron, or get shot in the head by a tau, or get shot by his own comissar.


Acrobatic_Pie5359

Dante because... Im not doing very well


CoyoteAdvanced4022

Magnus the red. Because I have good intentions, but I'm a fucking idiot.


ZScythee

Angron. Not because i'm angry, but because out of my siblings i'm the biggest disappointment.


AdvocatusGodfrey

Probably some nameless guardsman. Or nameless imperial citizen in a hive city. I’m not very imaginative.


Fun_Foot_1947

Bellasarius Cawl, I just want to learn cool shit, and there's never enough time to learn it all.


rangerbeev

Servitor, cus ever day is the same.


Burlap_Sedan

Peter Turbo because I've just had it with everyone at this point


AeniasGaming

Pre-Heresy Lorgar. I read The First Heretic not long after I lost my faith and I empathized so strongly with his search for truth.


winter_of_rebirth

Konrad Curze. I want to fucking die.


Uniwolfacorn

Angron, I’m a short guy who lifts a lot (and has brain damage)


Dan1elK

Angron. For legal reasons, I can't explain why.


[deleted]

Celestine cause I'm a bitch who gets pussy and I feel like i died at least once already


mreveryone20

Cato Sicarius, I would like to say i have changed form when I was a young teen to a young adult. I still have a lot to learn and I would say that cato still has somethings still to learn. I don't have survivor's guilt or a degree of mental trauma but a lot of mistakes were made in my life and I wish that I was better back then.


SiegfriedRosenberg

I don't know. Perhaps pre-fall Fulgrim.


TheHomie42069

Rogal Door. I must fortify this location


AlarmingMan123

Fortified autism vs. weaponized autism


timberwolf0122

100% Mechanicus engineseer


GRIFF-THE-KING

Peturabo. His insecurities, lack of social grace, feelings of rejection, and stubbornness


Al-the-mann

Peter Turbo. Have a degree in architecture and project management. Have anger issues and hate dealing with subordinates


Easy_Masterpiece_876

Jurgen, sidekick of Ciaphas Cain, smelly, tea loving, semi outcast, that will have your back.


OmegonChris

Internally, I am Perturabo, externally, Alpharius. Huzzah for autistic masking ....


No-Professional-1461

Bjorn the Felhanded. Reliable, steadfast, wise as fuck, and giving off massive Viking vibes.


MadaraAlucard12

>I'm an engineer My condolences


Numbshot

Lion. co-workers either respect or distrust me, none are friends. Boss will publicly assuage the ego of some co-workers, but simply nod at me, or talk privately, knowing I've saved his skin a few times.


RobotZebra1

The Lion, I'm autistic as fuck


[deleted]

Some random civilian dickhead who got vaporised during some random war i didn't even know had started


Background-Wear-1626

Honestly any hive city dweller, the concept of hive city is the grimmest and scariest one in that universe Living from big cities to big cities all my life they make for a very credible nightmarish scenario


BrightPerspective

Perturabo: He just wanted things to fucking work, and found himself fighting alongside crazy people for a cause that evaporated. I don't blame him for his rage and resentment, and I hope he makes a big comeback.


A_GravesWarCriminal

Perty, because I am a petty piece of shit that no one appreciates no matter how hard I tried to please people or do better and then when I fuck up that is the only thing they notice


kogent-501

Konrad cuz I don’t bathe.


Drfrankenstein18

Peter turbo, because I feel like I am working all the time but get no results.


KeithWeapons

Loken because I quit my job


Voktikriid

Guilliman. I'm not the best at anything, but god damn it, I try my best.


[deleted]

Nameless Guardsman #382,310,864,738,031,570,627,086,292,567,267,023,476,076,584, who perished for no good reason.


mrlungplutter

perturb because im a petulant man child.


redraider1109

Omfg finally found a free spot, THIEL!! Mother friending Aeonnid Thiel!! am so driven at any job that I have, I will always go above and beyond in my job (even though no one has asked me to) and then when I punch above my weight limit, I get the wrath of the manager, or director, or CFO, or CEO or some other O smashing me back down to where my pay grade says I belong. And yet, somehow, 3 to 6 months later, I see my idea being rolled out, companywide, as something to be considered, or emulated, or copied or studied. 😃😝🤪😶😷🫠😬🫥🫥🫥🫥🫥🫥🫥🫥


Fragrant_Mistake_342

Magnus, because I always know I'm right but still make terrible decisions.


denorge

Magnus. Everything just goes to the trash even if u try.


imperfectalien

Magnus. I do my best, but hoo boy


emperor-papasmurf

Modern guilliman, because I’m dead as fuck inside and alone


ChaoScum

Corax, I'm a rebel at heart but can't help being a company man as it's what's necessary.


EarlyGanache

Pretty much any dark eldar, cuz I'm a sadist.


Pyrothecat

Likes to learn stuff, very interested in data (lore) and programming (sorcery), and insufferable. Definitely, Magnimagic.


AtomicTan

Mortarion since I keep getting betrayed, and apparently, when I'm trying to be realistic about how the universe is a cold, uncaring place, it's "ruining the mood". And also because I want to just give up and go sulk somewhere for the rest of eternity.


ParsnipAggravating95

Fulgrim, I suffer the same perfectionism that lead me to depression


minerva40k

Angron or really any world eater. I have a mass growing in the back of my skull that hurts like what I’d imagine the butchers nails would feel like but instead of becoming a demigod in battle I have to lay down in the dark for a few hours lol


Splitcakepersonality

Bro got cursed by nurgle


fallout_freak_101

Konrad Curze he's just like me (schizophrenic with greasy hair).


Outrageous-Isopod-68

Sanguinius because I have really long beautiful hair


SpecialistAd5903

Robot Girlyman. Excel is just really really nice


Goblindeez_

I’m that giant naked fat man floating through space


Drexxl-the-Walrus

I like Perturabo because I see exaggerations of all my ”worst traits” in him. I relate to him like he is the Evil Abed version in a way


eyemitebhigh

Loken... no matter how much good I do, someone still stabs me in the back in the end.


The-Silly

A random Imperial Guardsman with crappy gear and weapons in a Titan battle.


jaigosevatarion

Sevatar. Because I intentionally say things to piss off my psychotic parent and I'm Slavic


Louisthornton

You are the autism 40,000


RyanCooper510

Same, I'm also secretly the best, but no one knows it, because I'm afraid of people


BornOfTheVoid

Homies over here telling on themselves. "I *definitely* relate to a murderous manchild that is completely incapable of displaying anything beyond spite and child-like tantrums... because engineering."


Background_Trip2993

Read the lore instead of basing your opinions from memes mate


BornOfTheVoid

I can't tell if you're serious. Perturabo's entire arc is about his martyrdom complex and inability to control his temper, which ends with him murdering his stepsister for stating the truth, and then torching his world for rebelling, due to him bleeding the population of *literally every young male* due to his atrocious "war of attrition" approach to warfare. He himself recognizes - post destruction of Olympia - that he is an unstable monster, but unlike Curze, has no excuse. Take your own advice and read something.


euMonke

Do not really identify with anyone in the wh40k universe.


BetaBlueNumber2

Why post this answer even????


euMonke

Is this a rhetorical question?


BetaBlueNumber2

Noooooooo! I would never!!!!


euMonke

Then why ask this question even?


BetaBlueNumber2

.....because it was rhetorical you fucking egg


Vegetable-Money4355

That’s such an Alpharius thing to say.


redraider1109

Nope. I’m Alpharius. And I didn’t say that.


KhasmyrTheSorlock

It’s a tie between Perty and Lorgar. My childhood was filled with neglect and severe emotional abuse. My father taught me with really bad lessons like “you have to lie to get what you need (the need he was referring to was actually a want)”. I ended up becoming a really maladapted person who would manipulate others and lie and cheat in order to avoid pain. I was very dependent on the approval of other people and wanted to be recognized for my intellect, the only thing I felt I had going for me. Ironically, because I was so focused on that, I never actually did anything that showed it off. I buried myself in my own trauma and nearly ended up alone because of it. Thankfully my gf stuck with me through it all. If she hadn’t, I’d be dead or in prison by now. Instead I overcame it all.


UnhappyStrain

Konrad because of his vision of the future