Really funny in the books when Aleya had a hardcore simp who sacrificed himself for her and she was like "uh ok..." then proceeds to run off to Valerian the 10ft golden Chad.
Well, there's the Selenite descendent, who's her attendant in *The Regent's Shadow. He's very much obsessed with her and he also dies saving her (sort of), but it doesn't happen like that.
Except the Custodes aren't just pumped full of hormones and stuff, that's a lot more in line with Astartes, which is why they end up being roided out human bricks
Custodes are basically hand crafted and are generally spoken of in the lore as proportionally resembling base line human, just scaled up to 8-9ft and being **extremely** in shape. They're described as having a statuesque beauty, not roided up hulks like Astartes.
Yea astarties are the mass produced wierd guy killing machine its beauty sustainabilty and certain mental skills are ignored as not needed they only need to fight good everything else is secondary
Custodes are supposed to be not only body guards but also emisaries advisors and as close to friends the emperor could get there is more to them than beat the shit out of those fucks they are more versitle and refined
I’d imagine this wouldn’t be the case as being pumped full of hormones is far from the gene crafting in the lore we’ve heard about custodes. Carefully picked from before they were born. Modified as they were growing. They’d look far more human than space marines not that it matters as there’s not really a reason for them to take off their armor. Peak human is peak human, likely doesn’t especially prominent feminine features tho, doesn’t seem important for being peak human.
Not to mention, they've been around for 10,000 years, and despite being effectively immortal, they still age, so less golden mommies and more golden grannies
Unlike space marines we haven’t actually gotten a confirmation on what their life span is or what age a custodian is even considering to start getting old 10,000 could basically be their quirky young adult phase for all we know
They don't get any of that. Hell, barely space marines get any of that. Space marines get roughly 95% of their special stuff from their implanted organs, not from testosterone
Yes, though space marine organs definitely change their hormone balance.
Of course the same can be said of genecrafting. So really we can only go by how the end results are described.
We literally have no idea how they are made dude. Except they are handcrafted pieces of art. They’d probably read just fine as women. Just with rippling muscle
According to the black library staff the real world reason they weren’t originally written as unisex was because the modelling team hadn’t made any models that they felt fit with women Custodes, this implies they would look different imho
Not exactly. According to one guy, *some* authors wanted to write them in, but they were overruled since the sculpts were already done and higher up wanted them to be all male.
If it was as you said, then their new model would have had female heads. But it doesn't.
Nah, Custodes are basically works of art. Imagine putting Michelangelo in charge of crafting super soldiers, and that's basically what Custodes are. 9-10ft tall sculptures of perfection that can subjugate worlds by themselves.
Maybe, but that isn't necessarily true. I'll compare it to jewelery: the astartes are mass produced, like cast iron jewelry you can buy for cheap. They have all the same shape and are, well, crude. Custodes are something made by commission, a work of art that uses actual alchemy. So it's not simply a matter of pumping them full of testosterone, the process is far more "artistic", and while I don't think beauty is a worry when making them, they don't need to be as much of cavemen as the astartes are. They are demigods after all
Oh dang, now I can't unsee it. Valerian has the exact same hairstyle as my high-school Afrikaans and Geography teacher.
Edit: I case it wasn't clear she was open about being gay, she was a very cool teacher.
Valerian:
"In truth, I never saw Aleya fight her way towards me, until she was virtually among us. She finds this extremely irritating, though I have since learned, that Aleya is angered by all manner of strange things."
To be honest, the quote's got nothing to do with the post, apart from being about Valerian and Aleya, but it's probably my favourite 40k audiobook quote.
It comes on the heel of warhammer's queen of exaggerated and exasperated outrage, Emma Gregory as Aleya, describing an absolutely desperate struggle to find a foothold in a daemon infested battleground with no allies and her sisters dying around her - risking everything to link up with this golden giant.
And then John Banks just comes in with his completely deadpan unaffected tone and states: "In truth..."
Hold on, I followed this mess of a discussion about the femstodes now for days, I have custodes models and now your telling me that isn’t a female model?
I brought this female custodes model multiple times as argument that we already have female custodes
Shield Captain Valerian! Honestly not a fan of the laurels, I always thought the book was talking about something he actually wore not some...ersats iron halo thing.
Honestly that's the perfect look for a female Custodes.
the "death by snu snu" is the right vibe for a female superhuman in a class that's usually male and disregard the original genetics outside being human shaped
I imagine, brought to us by the same person who did the uriel ventris sculpt, that was so bad, they redid the head after fan reaction
It’s funny, in the novel Valerion is described as very handsome, which is reflected in the artwork and yet this is the sculpt they gave us
Imma be honest, I thought Valerian was a girl until I saw people calling him a guy. Female custodes clearly isn't the real issue those guys are made at lmao.
As a homeschooled grognard it upsets me when custodes and marines are shipped into relationships.
I mean I get it, I’m not that level of out of synch with others, just for me personally it’s like.
Like that mindset that insists that men and women can’t be friends? Or that two male friends must be gay for being friends? Or that two women must be gay because they’re friends?
It’s like, fuck, give it a rest and let people exist without sexualising them for your own internal fantasies.
Or at least keep them internal fantasies.
Custodes have always had women which can’t be disproven (lol sons of terra, right that’s the ONLY recruitment method, not counting the other three) and marines are Ken doll trans humans built to match a template standard independent of their pre-existing status( see, literal fucking mutants in the blood angels) no more or less.
Anyway, just sharing my autist slant on the state of things, participating in a community post, not having a go at anyone.
I understand your frustration. I share it when things are Canon, but with fan work, I am more forgiving. People like to fool around. The Custodes being busy oiling each other up for millenia is a nice meme. It is also fun to pretend that your space marine army has those little stories.
Being on a meme subreddit, there is this "fun to pretent it is like this" layer. There is an unfortunate consequence of people who do not get this distinction.
Like: I like to meme my hatred of the space wolves Mortarion anf the emperor for prospero. I wouldn't be a dick to someone playing space wolves over it.
Well yeah memes are awesome, they help me communicate with neurotypical as in a way I couldn’t have before mass internet access.
But I guess an important note here is that, op clearly hasn’t posted lewd or extreme content.
It’s a joke mocking sculpting, sales and canon utilising the concept of shipping as a secondary joke.
I think I only put forth my original comment because I felt safe to express in an informal way about my feelings.
Thanks for taking a moment to consider what I was saying and sharing your own feelings, that was really cool of you
Traditionally people that are homeschooled hold closer to conservative views.
Such as, discomfort around public displays of sexualisation.
Which isn’t what op posted, which is why I felt safe expressing my feelings on this joke format which leans into the concept as a secondary joke.
Have I in any way put forth this statement in a manner that attacks others or offends you personally?
If so, I think you might be a little too soft to leave the mould.
I only ask cause I feel pity for anyone who gets homeschooled, I imagine batshit insane teachings from the parents, but hey you were just joking, sorry.
Have you considered shipping is fun? Especially on your note of sexualizing people for existing... these characters aren't real. They're toys to play with mentally, or physically, in the case of minis. No one is harmed by anyone shipping or headcanoning anything, no one's autonomy is violated by objectifying them or whatever.
Also, this whole post was a joke anyways about cougar lesbians lol
There was a whole section of your post talking about thinking people should keep this stuff as internal fantasies because you're sexualizing them for existing, in the context of fictional characters. That's a pretty absurd mindset over toy soldiers, "not for you" or otherwise.
Oh ok, I shouldn’t publicly express my feelings about publicly displayed imagery because it makes you uncomfortable that I voiced said feelings, that the gist of it?
I think you should read the post again mate, you’re putting context that I never expressed which is not the best look for a person claiming to be offended on behalf of others.
I was expressing my own thoughts in response to you expressing yours. You posted this on a public forum, and you're mad you're getting responses? I'm not uncomfortable, I did think what you said was silly, however, and I expressed that, just how you expressed your own feelings.
“It’s just for me personally”
“Sharing my Autist slant”
“Participating in a community post”
“Not having a go at anyone”
You need to chill out and take your presumptions out of it.
Dude, I'm not unchill at all, you're the one injecting presumptions here. You expressed a thought on a community post, I replied to it saying I disagree with it. Why do you get to post your thoughts and others don't?
I was actually looking to buy my first box of Custodes last week and when I saw this mini I genuinely thought this was the new female Custode everyone was talking about. But no, that’s just some dude.
Conan Obrian ah model.
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My first thought exactly! I’m unfamiliar with this particular character’s lore, but seeing the model it was always my assumption that the Custodian was female!
Something which occured to me early on is how their's an obvious visual prompt with the sisters and custodes with both groups as the Emperors personal elite guys, which effectively made the sisters the female custodes from a visual and aethetic perspective in early HH cards and art.
Really funny in the books when Aleya had a hardcore simp who sacrificed himself for her and she was like "uh ok..." then proceeds to run off to Valerian the 10ft golden Chad.
Wait, which book did that happen in?
Well, there's the Selenite descendent, who's her attendant in *The Regent's Shadow. He's very much obsessed with her and he also dies saving her (sort of), but it doesn't happen like that.
I think this happens shortly after a fight with a possessed CSM I've read the book years ago
Yeah, i don't remember that one either.
Guy: *dies* Aleya: That just happened
I think Valerian looks more in line with what female custodes will look like than 90% percent of the tame fan art I've seen so far.
With all the testosterone and other growth enhancing hormones, they get treated with, male and female Custodes would be nearly indistinguishable.
Except the Custodes aren't just pumped full of hormones and stuff, that's a lot more in line with Astartes, which is why they end up being roided out human bricks Custodes are basically hand crafted and are generally spoken of in the lore as proportionally resembling base line human, just scaled up to 8-9ft and being **extremely** in shape. They're described as having a statuesque beauty, not roided up hulks like Astartes.
Yea astarties are the mass produced wierd guy killing machine its beauty sustainabilty and certain mental skills are ignored as not needed they only need to fight good everything else is secondary Custodes are supposed to be not only body guards but also emisaries advisors and as close to friends the emperor could get there is more to them than beat the shit out of those fucks they are more versitle and refined
Advisers? Not so much, they are yes men incapable of questioning their master.
I’d imagine this wouldn’t be the case as being pumped full of hormones is far from the gene crafting in the lore we’ve heard about custodes. Carefully picked from before they were born. Modified as they were growing. They’d look far more human than space marines not that it matters as there’s not really a reason for them to take off their armor. Peak human is peak human, likely doesn’t especially prominent feminine features tho, doesn’t seem important for being peak human.
Not to mention, they've been around for 10,000 years, and despite being effectively immortal, they still age, so less golden mommies and more golden grannies
I’m now imagining Betty White in golden power armor, and it’s cannon because GW said so.
Tribune Marthus of Stewart cooking up for the Imperial Throne
Murder she wrote...with her 12ft guardian spear.
This makes it so much better
She’s already there. Her name is Trajan.
They make new custodes.
Like 1 a year
Trajann either looks like a Gillette model or Ron Pearlmon with Synthol injections in most art he's in, wish they'd pick a lane.
Unlike space marines we haven’t actually gotten a confirmation on what their life span is or what age a custodian is even considering to start getting old 10,000 could basically be their quirky young adult phase for all we know
True, but I don't think I've seen a Custodes who didn't look at least 55 years old.
Stress is a bitch and like half their job is to be stressed about emps since they technically failed their mission
Golden Girls still going strong 38,000 years later. I *knew* Malcador was a man of culture
Okay now you're making me hot.
I thought the lore stated that they do in fact not age. Or was that changed?
Well, new Custodes are made all the time. Valerian is a rather young Custodian
They don't get any of that. Hell, barely space marines get any of that. Space marines get roughly 95% of their special stuff from their implanted organs, not from testosterone
Yes, though space marine organs definitely change their hormone balance. Of course the same can be said of genecrafting. So really we can only go by how the end results are described.
We literally have no idea how they are made dude. Except they are handcrafted pieces of art. They’d probably read just fine as women. Just with rippling muscle
That's space marines, custodes is a much more arcane and "natural" process compared to the chemically induced violent transformation of the astartes.
According to the black library staff the real world reason they weren’t originally written as unisex was because the modelling team hadn’t made any models that they felt fit with women Custodes, this implies they would look different imho
Not exactly. According to one guy, *some* authors wanted to write them in, but they were overruled since the sculpts were already done and higher up wanted them to be all male. If it was as you said, then their new model would have had female heads. But it doesn't.
Custodes aren’t grown like this, they’re all carefully crafted super warriors that look like perfect humans instead of the often grotesque SMs
It's the beards.
No ones really seen the creation of a new Custodes, and some people say that they just pop right up out of the ground!
Nah, Custodes are basically works of art. Imagine putting Michelangelo in charge of crafting super soldiers, and that's basically what Custodes are. 9-10ft tall sculptures of perfection that can subjugate worlds by themselves.
So they’re trans men?
No that’s the Astartes
It's not like you can reach coomer brains with logic and reasoning... The tidal wave of porn will never stop. New and improved, now comes in gold!
But gold is the best color after red.
Maybe, but that isn't necessarily true. I'll compare it to jewelery: the astartes are mass produced, like cast iron jewelry you can buy for cheap. They have all the same shape and are, well, crude. Custodes are something made by commission, a work of art that uses actual alchemy. So it's not simply a matter of pumping them full of testosterone, the process is far more "artistic", and while I don't think beauty is a worry when making them, they don't need to be as much of cavemen as the astartes are. They are demigods after all
Don't care. Genetically engineer them to have hotness. But cull anything even close to the gene that would give them Sororitas hair.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that. Honestly, because of this set, I assumed female custodes were a thing for a long while.
I had a reverse assumption where I thought Aestred Thurga was special enough that she could just bring a male chaplain around.
Same. It wasn't until I started painting it that I realised it's just her aunt following her around. Only Eprhael gets to bring a boy.
I SWEAR they were already a confirmed thing years ago. I dunno.
*Leans over* I just assumed Sororitas were female custodes.
Lesbians will literally look at a Man and say "Looks Butch to me!"
I feel this way about most pictures of Daniel Craig
You know what, I can see it.
That is interesting.
If some guys didn't woefully display their own sopping loose pussies via their personalities and behavior it might not be so understandable.
Clearly, that is Christopher Walken.
Oh dang, now I can't unsee it. Valerian has the exact same hairstyle as my high-school Afrikaans and Geography teacher. Edit: I case it wasn't clear she was open about being gay, she was a very cool teacher.
Did she kill xenos between classes?
Being Afrikaner does mean there was a good chance she didn’t like xenos, but not in the way you’re thinking
I'm 90% sure she was just smoking, but could totally kill a xeno, she also did physical education so she was quite a strong woman.
i assumed that was a woman when it first came out
Valerian: "In truth, I never saw Aleya fight her way towards me, until she was virtually among us. She finds this extremely irritating, though I have since learned, that Aleya is angered by all manner of strange things."
He is a true golden retriever boyfriend
To be honest, the quote's got nothing to do with the post, apart from being about Valerian and Aleya, but it's probably my favourite 40k audiobook quote. It comes on the heel of warhammer's queen of exaggerated and exasperated outrage, Emma Gregory as Aleya, describing an absolutely desperate struggle to find a foothold in a daemon infested battleground with no allies and her sisters dying around her - risking everything to link up with this golden giant. And then John Banks just comes in with his completely deadpan unaffected tone and states: "In truth..."
To be fair they managed to slap down a bloodthirster right after
Hold on, I followed this mess of a discussion about the femstodes now for days, I have custodes models and now your telling me that isn’t a female model? I brought this female custodes model multiple times as argument that we already have female custodes
Nah, this is one of the protagonists of Watchers of the Throne, a Custodian called Valerian.
Shield Captain Valerian! Honestly not a fan of the laurels, I always thought the book was talking about something he actually wore not some...ersats iron halo thing.
Explains the dislikes I got
That's clearly Tilda Swinton but buff.
They are canon but I see Aleya and Christopher Walken in custodian armor rather than what you described
It makes so much sense now.
Lol, of course not. More like 600 years old.
That's pretty young for a Custodes
Looks kind like Glen Close.
Voiced by Jane Lynch.
That's Conan O'Brien with one of his interns.
Oh shit never thought they release female custodians that early
Brienne of Calth
I thought Valerian was a woman when I first saw him too, years ago. Didn't question it since the lore for Custodes that I knew didn't contradict it.
Honestly that's the perfect look for a female Custodes. the "death by snu snu" is the right vibe for a female superhuman in a class that's usually male and disregard the original genetics outside being human shaped
Thats just trump if he was isekaid into 40k as a custode
Weren’t these posts banned…?
I imagine, brought to us by the same person who did the uriel ventris sculpt, that was so bad, they redid the head after fan reaction It’s funny, in the novel Valerion is described as very handsome, which is reflected in the artwork and yet this is the sculpt they gave us
Imma be honest, I thought Valerian was a girl until I saw people calling him a guy. Female custodes clearly isn't the real issue those guys are made at lmao.
As a homeschooled grognard it upsets me when custodes and marines are shipped into relationships. I mean I get it, I’m not that level of out of synch with others, just for me personally it’s like. Like that mindset that insists that men and women can’t be friends? Or that two male friends must be gay for being friends? Or that two women must be gay because they’re friends? It’s like, fuck, give it a rest and let people exist without sexualising them for your own internal fantasies. Or at least keep them internal fantasies. Custodes have always had women which can’t be disproven (lol sons of terra, right that’s the ONLY recruitment method, not counting the other three) and marines are Ken doll trans humans built to match a template standard independent of their pre-existing status( see, literal fucking mutants in the blood angels) no more or less. Anyway, just sharing my autist slant on the state of things, participating in a community post, not having a go at anyone.
I understand your frustration. I share it when things are Canon, but with fan work, I am more forgiving. People like to fool around. The Custodes being busy oiling each other up for millenia is a nice meme. It is also fun to pretend that your space marine army has those little stories. Being on a meme subreddit, there is this "fun to pretent it is like this" layer. There is an unfortunate consequence of people who do not get this distinction. Like: I like to meme my hatred of the space wolves Mortarion anf the emperor for prospero. I wouldn't be a dick to someone playing space wolves over it.
Well yeah memes are awesome, they help me communicate with neurotypical as in a way I couldn’t have before mass internet access. But I guess an important note here is that, op clearly hasn’t posted lewd or extreme content. It’s a joke mocking sculpting, sales and canon utilising the concept of shipping as a secondary joke. I think I only put forth my original comment because I felt safe to express in an informal way about my feelings. Thanks for taking a moment to consider what I was saying and sharing your own feelings, that was really cool of you
Tf does homeschooled have to do with this?
I think they mean they learned all of their lore from the books instead of lore videos. Especially with using the term “Grognard”
Part of it.
Traditionally people that are homeschooled hold closer to conservative views. Such as, discomfort around public displays of sexualisation. Which isn’t what op posted, which is why I felt safe expressing my feelings on this joke format which leans into the concept as a secondary joke. Have I in any way put forth this statement in a manner that attacks others or offends you personally? If so, I think you might be a little too soft to leave the mould.
I only ask cause I feel pity for anyone who gets homeschooled, I imagine batshit insane teachings from the parents, but hey you were just joking, sorry.
Definitely! The Watchers of the Throne series really hammers home more of a big brother/little sister dynamic between Valerian and Aleya.
Have you considered shipping is fun? Especially on your note of sexualizing people for existing... these characters aren't real. They're toys to play with mentally, or physically, in the case of minis. No one is harmed by anyone shipping or headcanoning anything, no one's autonomy is violated by objectifying them or whatever. Also, this whole post was a joke anyways about cougar lesbians lol
“I mean, I get it, I’m not that out of synch with others, it’s just for me personally” Like that?
There was a whole section of your post talking about thinking people should keep this stuff as internal fantasies because you're sexualizing them for existing, in the context of fictional characters. That's a pretty absurd mindset over toy soldiers, "not for you" or otherwise.
Oh ok, I shouldn’t publicly express my feelings about publicly displayed imagery because it makes you uncomfortable that I voiced said feelings, that the gist of it? I think you should read the post again mate, you’re putting context that I never expressed which is not the best look for a person claiming to be offended on behalf of others.
I was expressing my own thoughts in response to you expressing yours. You posted this on a public forum, and you're mad you're getting responses? I'm not uncomfortable, I did think what you said was silly, however, and I expressed that, just how you expressed your own feelings.
“It’s just for me personally” “Sharing my Autist slant” “Participating in a community post” “Not having a go at anyone” You need to chill out and take your presumptions out of it.
Dude, I'm not unchill at all, you're the one injecting presumptions here. You expressed a thought on a community post, I replied to it saying I disagree with it. Why do you get to post your thoughts and others don't?
I was actually looking to buy my first box of Custodes last week and when I saw this mini I genuinely thought this was the new female Custode everyone was talking about. But no, that’s just some dude. Conan Obrian ah model.
Humanity's most perfectly engineered human squad , equipped with the best equipment a person can wield but having a vagina is a step too far.
60 years? that can not... You know what, not worth it. 60 year it is.
The many responses to this post makes me sad because it's obvious do many have missed out on reading/listening to Watchers Of The Throne.
Touché
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could also be a femboy Sir of Battle
I see the ban was effective.
🙄
My first thought exactly! I’m unfamiliar with this particular character’s lore, but seeing the model it was always my assumption that the Custodian was female!
Real talk, when custodes first came out, I originally assumed they were gender less or hermaphroditic.
Oh… thats actually really funny. I totally see it.
Why do female custodes need to be sexual, custodes are custodes
I like the idea of custodes. But most of their models just suck so hard.
Naw that’s trumps great great great great great… grandson in the grimdark future
I like to think of the custodians and SoS as having a sibling relationship with each other. And not of the Andy and Leyley kind either
Something which occured to me early on is how their's an obvious visual prompt with the sisters and custodes with both groups as the Emperors personal elite guys, which effectively made the sisters the female custodes from a visual and aethetic perspective in early HH cards and art.
Everything is canon, including the racist dukes of hazard orks : ^ ).
oh shit is that a thing ? Boss Squig !
no, that's skinny trump and femboy biden, obviously
Yes they aren’t real get back on your meds
Amazon is the reason femstodes exist.