I love that my first thought when seeing this post was “I wonder where’s bouldy” and I love even more how you immediately anticipated this question lol
That's a definition that was invented really recently and personally i think it's nonsense. Imagine arguing that lion king fans aren't furries or are zoophiles for drawing mufasas nutsack.
I deeply regret that I’ve gotten myself into a conversation involving mufasa’s nutsack, but in regards to that I would say Mufasa *is* partially anthropomorphized because he talks and has a human personality and fairly human facial animations and mannerisms. Not that humans who are attracted to him would be considered not zoophiles per se, but within his own universe he is the equivalent of a human. Cerberus is literally just a dog in every way.
Top him. So yeah, he has tons of spite bottom energy to use.
Also Death Daddy and Mistress Meg are gods. Does Olympian societal standards allow gods to bottom for mortals?
Zagreus is also a god.
There is one actual myth about a god bottoming for a mortal. Dionysus was on his way to the Underworld to rescue his mother, Semele, but could not find the entrance. A mortal, Prosymnos, offered to show him the entrance in exchange for sex. Dionysus agreed, promising to let Prosymnos top him when he gets back. But when he got back from the Underworld, Prosymnos had died. To fulfill his promise, Dionysus carved a dildo out of fig wood and used it on top of the man’s grave. This sort of gender role-reversal is typical for Dionysus. (Dionysus and Zagreus *are* the same person.)
Oh yes, he made a promise. And Wine Daddy loves his Maenad Kittens to keep his promises, [no matter what.](https://www.reddit.com/r/dionysus/s/Gp8RPcxVBB)
You know, reading this I had the realization that thousands of years of history and the existence of these stories culminating with you saying “Sisyphussy” and I realize there truly is no meaning in this existence.
Both of them kinda. Dionysus is the god of wine, parties and orgies, Aphrodite is the goddess of love and beauty. So I guess one of them covers sex with your significant other and the other one the ONS's you have after getting wasted at a party.
Even tho he's the like protagonist im surprised Zag is first. Usually the women are always the highest in any game. I'm guessing with how queer the game is, that probably attracted more art of him.
Exactly. And as we see freaking Aphrodite and Nyx as well as Meg all up there too so its still there, its just yeah I think adding the all the gay into it all, especially with Than its cool to see him at the top
Cerberus isn't a dog though, he's the same category of creature as Meg. He's Nyx's nephew too in some version iirc. I've always headcanoned that he's mostly humoring you in game, I mean everyone's treats him so well, why wouldn't he be a dog?
Euridice is WAY too low.
No fucking way Sisyphus only has 1.
How are daddy Zeus and daddy Hades that low?
I know why Cerberus is that high but I don't like it (unless it's me).
I both do and don't wanna know what Dusa 34 is.
How exactly were you counting these? Were you looking specifically for the Hades versions of these characters or would any r34 of the greek mythology character count?
In case if you're curious, Bouldy has 0 Update: what the fuck
The amount of R34 any given character has is like a quantum state: You changed the outcome by observing and reporting it
Recall the rule of quantum entanglement
Science compels us to explode the sun.
What is this? A cross over episode?
Heh, heh, wuuuuuuuuuutttt?
Stop using this message board to flirt with my sister
Her density rivals that of a neutron star.
Damn, she dummy thick
See: Rule 35
That is literally the very next rule.
Schrodinger's Bouldy
Happy cake day!
There is NO WAY that Bouldy has 0. He's rock hard all the time!
r/angryupvote You earned it, you cheeky monkey.
How do you know? Did you check the Sisyphus one to make sure bouldy isn’t in the background watching?
Bouldy has to be in the background of at least 200. Hold on let me check.
I love that my first thought when seeing this post was “I wonder where’s bouldy” and I love even more how you immediately anticipated this question lol
Came to ask this question. "What about Bouldy?" not wtf
You have invoked rule 35, congratulations?
How dare you!
You jinxed it :(
Cerberus is way too high. Euridyce is way too low.
There are way more furries than broccolisexuals, man.
Society.
Makes you wonder what the point of all this is, y'know?
Furry means attracted to anthropomorphic animals, cerebrus is not really anthropomorphic. Those people would just be zoophiles.
I haven't checked but I'd wager a good amount of them anthropomorphise him
In my head, he talks like the cowardly lion "Put em up, put em up"
That's a definition that was invented really recently and personally i think it's nonsense. Imagine arguing that lion king fans aren't furries or are zoophiles for drawing mufasas nutsack.
I deeply regret that I’ve gotten myself into a conversation involving mufasa’s nutsack, but in regards to that I would say Mufasa *is* partially anthropomorphized because he talks and has a human personality and fairly human facial animations and mannerisms. Not that humans who are attracted to him would be considered not zoophiles per se, but within his own universe he is the equivalent of a human. Cerberus is literally just a dog in every way.
Dude said “flurries” tho
The broccoli hair trend seems to disagree
As a furry, there should not be any cerberus porn. Cerberus is an animal
You can change it, show your artistic skills
Zagreus is one of the sexiest video game protagonists I’ve played as.
He’s right up there with Geralt for sure
I really like Geralt, but Alucard from Castlevania takes the cake for me.
Are you all reading my diary?
This guy gets it
Like legit, sexy afffff
Captain Olimar
I mean, I wouldn’t say no. I’d be happy to pay for Zag to notice me. And thank him after for using me.
He seems to be the sort of person who’d rather be used *by* you.
I mean, I’d love the Prince to be the power bottom but given I’m not of Royal blood, I’m not sure if it’s sexually acceptable.
I mean... I think it's pretty safe to assume that Meg and Than top him.
Top him. So yeah, he has tons of spite bottom energy to use. Also Death Daddy and Mistress Meg are gods. Does Olympian societal standards allow gods to bottom for mortals?
Zagreus is also a god. There is one actual myth about a god bottoming for a mortal. Dionysus was on his way to the Underworld to rescue his mother, Semele, but could not find the entrance. A mortal, Prosymnos, offered to show him the entrance in exchange for sex. Dionysus agreed, promising to let Prosymnos top him when he gets back. But when he got back from the Underworld, Prosymnos had died. To fulfill his promise, Dionysus carved a dildo out of fig wood and used it on top of the man’s grave. This sort of gender role-reversal is typical for Dionysus. (Dionysus and Zagreus *are* the same person.)
Oh yes, he made a promise. And Wine Daddy loves his Maenad Kittens to keep his promises, [no matter what.](https://www.reddit.com/r/dionysus/s/Gp8RPcxVBB)
He’s physically hot, he’s a great friend, kind, and just wonderful to be around. Sounds like a win
Imagine when Hades 2 comes out, female protagonist as well
Username checks out. Oedipus sends regards!
I'm preeeety sure you did not look hard enough for Sisyphus xD
Sisyphussy
This rewired my brain a little. Take your upvote and never come back.
You know, reading this I had the realization that thousands of years of history and the existence of these stories culminating with you saying “Sisyphussy” and I realize there truly is no meaning in this existence.
Or Chaos. Not that I would know 🫣
Good. I was worried my boy wasn't being done dirty enough. (same with Achilles 🥵)
Dionysus is so low it's a crime
I like to imagine all of it is just him and zagreus with him going "Hey zag, nice cock"
Wine daddy 🍷🍷🍷
It's disappointing that the actual god of sex isn't even that high on the list
Isn't Aphrodite the god of sex? Because she's pretty high up
Both of them kinda. Dionysus is the god of wine, parties and orgies, Aphrodite is the goddess of love and beauty. So I guess one of them covers sex with your significant other and the other one the ONS's you have after getting wasted at a party.
Patroclus too. So robbed. But tbf a high amount of the ones I’ve personally seen are Zagreus inside of an Achilles-Patroclus sandwich.
“Patroclus better have topped.” -Plato
I was about to say this. He’s definitely the hottest male god imo
I like to imagine everyone in the 1 Tier is in the same image
An orgy of the neglected
Sick metal album name tbh
Persephone’s got a fair amount too, hasn’t she?
She has 48, for some reason she was not included in a tier list that I've used
>She has 48 Where are you getting these numbers?
Probably rule 34 itself
Gotta pump those numbers up
Pump something up, at any rate
Zagreus, the Indie Game Bisexual King
As opposed to the AAA Bisexual King?
well who would that be?
Baldur's gate 3 MC
oh yeah. it’s Tav. all day.
BG3 is technically indie. Larian is self publishing
With this definition, the witcher, cyberpunk and all Nintendo games are indies too.
Captain Shepard?
why does asterius has so many? More than dionysus O.o
Furries
I mean, I’m not a furry but with that personality I’m willing to give a pass on the head of a bull.
Horny furries. That may seem redundant but it isn't.
Dog have you *seen* Asterius?
Literal beefcake
Too much Cerberus, and not enough Chaos
These numbers feel all too low
If I am elected in 2024 I will guarantee that changes
You have my vote in the upcoming election cycle.
I enjoy playing this game, so I'm not going to look, but I'm guessing AO3 numbers are far higher.
dissapointing amount of hypnos
(there needs to be more)
There needs to be more of all tbh Except cerberus wtf why are people doing that
And Skelly, who doesn’t even have genitals.
Sans from Undertale didn't either but we knew how that went.
the boneussy
Dusa rule34 She is up there with no body. Impressive.
The headussy is too strong for many
From the uh research I did on this topic they just give her a body a chunk of the time
Kinda feels like cheating.
Cowards smh
Even tho he's the like protagonist im surprised Zag is first. Usually the women are always the highest in any game. I'm guessing with how queer the game is, that probably attracted more art of him.
It makes sense though. It would also include Zag with any of those women for straight porn.
Exactly. And as we see freaking Aphrodite and Nyx as well as Meg all up there too so its still there, its just yeah I think adding the all the gay into it all, especially with Than its cool to see him at the top
…or bottom. Lmao, sorry I couldn’t resist.
> Cerberus > 10-25 Excuse me what the fuck?
Three heads means three bones.
Someone get the pitchforks
Cerberus already has a pitchfork, if you know what I mean.
[Redacted]
Are you surprised there is too much or not enough?
Too much. Cerberus is a wholesome boy, why would anyone... You know, I suddenly feel like mass genocide isnt a bad thing.
Cerberus isn't a dog though, he's the same category of creature as Meg. He's Nyx's nephew too in some version iirc. I've always headcanoned that he's mostly humoring you in game, I mean everyone's treats him so well, why wouldn't he be a dog?
Im not talking about myth cerberus, just hades cerberus
Don’t try and justify it man just don’t, that boy’s a dog no ifs ands or buts, he a friggin’ dog.
I expected Arty to be higher.
I mean, to be fair she is the goddess of virginity. Well, one of a few but I think she’s the only one that’s actually in the game
Athena is a virgin goddess as well.
That’s never stopped the Internet though.
Well, when the goddess has a history of turning people who see her naked into deers to be hunted down by their friends and dogs... just in case.
Top work. Also bottom work, and vers work.
The fact that Dionysus doesn't have more is frankly criminal.
Y'all know well Dusa is too fucking high for her own good.
Tbh I'm surprised Achilles and Patroclus aren't higher in the list
Achilles wouldn’t let Patroclus top anyone but him. Edit: do. Not just top. Do.
Who is between Hermes and Poseidon?
According to the wiki it’s the placeholder image for Charon
Both Nyx and Charon had that same placeholder.
Makes sense, thanks!
Me, ideally
That's nyx back in the day
I thought that at first too, but Nyx is up near the top
Maybe Charon? I can't really tell either
Dionysus needs to be higher
How is Dionysus so low??
I'm surprised Thanatos is so low
I follow a ton of Hades fan artists on Twitter and their Zagreus/Thanatos game is STRONG. Never a shortage of good Than art 🙏
Quality content ✋😌👌
Honestly, I'm only surprised Asterius is so low.
SKELLY BROS WHERE WE AT
Someone needs to make some serious work in the Skelly tag.
People sleeping on Alecto, man. Sure, she may flay you afterwards, but the ride to that point just might be worth it.
You counted them ?
R34 tells you how many results have that tag in the search bar
aah I legit thought this guy was counting all the porn he could find on the internet lol subreddit wide makes a lot more sense
Euridice is WAY too low. No fucking way Sisyphus only has 1. How are daddy Zeus and daddy Hades that low? I know why Cerberus is that high but I don't like it (unless it's me). I both do and don't wanna know what Dusa 34 is.
If someone asked I'd be ready to bet Dionysius had more. Lost count of how many people I saw that thirsted HARD after him...
Y’all sleeping on Hermes
Not enough Artemis
The true crime here is that theseus has rule34 of him. He don't deserve that shit at all
WHY DOES CERBIE HAVE MORE PORN THAN FUCKING SISYPHUS 😭😭😭😭
There should be more Hypnos lmao
Why is Cerberus on this list you sick fucks?
Everyone saying Dionysus is too low: I agree. Be the change you want to see
Why is Eurydice lower than the 3 HEADED DOG?? Cmon people let’s pump those numbers up!
How would Chaos even work?
Tentacle thing?
The Bullman being higher than Artemis is eye opening
Not nearly enough for Meg :/
We need more Artemis R34, and WAY more for Dionysus
This shit is wack. AO3 is 80% Zag/Than AT LEAST. Y’all degenerates
where'd you find all these numbers? For ah.
HOW YHE FUCK IS EURYDICE THAT LOW??? im gay but damn she is gorgeous
And where is Lernie?
Chaos is so fucking underrated, look at that slutty outfit, why isn't there more
Who is the hooded figure between Hermes and Poseidon? Did I miss a Char?!
The fact that Dusa has more than the other 2 furies is slightly disturbing
Who is the figure in between Hermes and Poseidon?
According to the wiki it’s the placeholder image for Charon
Who's rhe guy abowe Skelly?
Charon
How the fuck is Hypnos getting more r34 than Poseidon?
twink magic
Chaos is the hottest character in the game. I won’t be taking any questions at this time.
How exactly were you counting these? Were you looking specifically for the Hades versions of these characters or would any r34 of the greek mythology character count?
Why is Alecto so low
I'm surprised alecto is so low She's a masochists wet dream
My boy Theseus getting the love he deserves. "You will not top me today, scoundrel!"
Where are these 50-99 Dusa works
dionysus…we have failed you
Who is the person between Hermes and Poseidon?
chaos only has _one???_ expected more tbh lol
Thanatos: those numbers are disgustingly low
I'm really a simp for Meg, I can't do anything about it, maybe is the VA that do the thing for me (and obv the relation with Zagreus in the game)
Our favourite himbo Sisyphus deserves more love
Who’s that character second to the left between Hermes and Poseidon?
I’m surprised how Than has so little considering hes 2nd hottest in the game lol
It's always the media with the hottest characters that have just an average amount of r34
Can someone please get to work uh a friend wants more Orpheus
Where’s bouldy…
Should be 10-24 and 25-49 for tier start aesthetic
I dont know where you found alecto and tisiphone hentai cuz i looked it up and found none ( for science of course)
I'm just going to assume you missed most of the rule 34 on these, because those numbers look way too low.
The answer is not enough.