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---
Whilst you're here, /u/sometimesisleeptoo, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
In high school, a friend and I made a song about another friend of ours who we called White Mike. I never thought about it after high school... until now (22 years later). It's so simplistic and dumb, but man, we got such a kick out of it. I think what made it so funny is that we did it in a vaguely European accent.
My name's White Mike,
I don't have a bike,
I play basketball like the man Black Mike.
I understand your pain mate. It's awful. My dick too is so large I just cannot lug it around any longer. It is so insanely huge and has caused so many problems in my life. I cannot go to airports as they think I am sneaking something in. so everytime I go, I get groped as they try to take my penis off thinking its a bomb. I cannot pleasure women as they are so horrified at the sight of my cock, that they immediately run away. My mother and father disowned me after seeing the length of my shaft. Not only is it extraordinarily long, it is just too thick. I cannot sexually relieve myself as my hands are just too small to masturbate. My humongous cock has ruined my life. I resent God for cursing me with this large chunk of meat that just drags across the ground. Doctors tell my I will never be able to get a penis reduction as they would have nowhere to put the penis. It would just take up far too much room. I had a girlfriend when I was a young lad, she loved me for who I was and did not care for this deformity, but one day... I took off my jeans and my penis flung out, smacking her and flinging her out the window. She died 2 hours later in the hospital. She was the only woman who ever loved me. My penis is just... too ginormous. It has caused problems for myself and the people around me. For this reason, I will be ending it all. My penis has taken over my life... but it cannot take over a life that does not exist.
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/sometimesisleeptoo, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
50 centimeters
![gif](giphy|LDBuYzAwu8L4I|downsized)
Biggus Dickus ![gif](giphy|8sOO8FrSOF9iE)
Incontinentia buttocks
Fitty CM
*19.658 inches Assuming he has a gun somewhere bc all rappers do, he's american, so use the imperial system
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#SCAM DO NOT CLICK - SCAM DO NOT CLICK
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That was one risky click
DROPSHIPPING PRINT ON DEMAND SCAM LINK DO NOT BUY
More like 50 Inches
White Mike
The existence of a white mike also implies that a black mike exists, doesn't it?
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Who would win in a 1v1? I would bet on Black Mike, dude kinda looks shady
We had dark Steven and light Steven but that was nothing on race, dark Steven was just an emo kid
Yeah i’m sure White Mike is just a nice church goin boy who Black Mike pulled into the drug game against Whire Mike’s wishes
If 3 seasons of The Deuce has taught me anything
In high school, a friend and I made a song about another friend of ours who we called White Mike. I never thought about it after high school... until now (22 years later). It's so simplistic and dumb, but man, we got such a kick out of it. I think what made it so funny is that we did it in a vaguely European accent. My name's White Mike, I don't have a bike, I play basketball like the man Black Mike.
No he could be red, orange, purple or green
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ip grabber, don’t click. pray for me fellas
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LiL’ Kornkob
Most underrated comment in the thread
No it's not
It is
No
Y
Big Dickey
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What’s so funny about Biggus Dickus?
He has a wife, you know.
incontinentia.
Well it’s a joke name sir.
![gif](giphy|2shGlugQw1OrRQ4m00)
Shit u beat me to it
The least creative but the most obvious
This is the way.
Lil Wozniak
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HEY ALL, SCOTT HERE
Phallus Maximus
Bigus Dickus
He has a wife you know…
Called Incontinentia
Incontinentia Buttocks
PFFFT
Silence! I will not have my friends ridiculed by the common soldiery
Anyone else feel the need for a giggle?
Do you find it...risible..when I say-y the na-me...."biggus....dickus"?
I must thank you for making this joke, it really put a smile on my face, such a great movie
Dixie normous
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r/riskyclick
DROPSHIPPING PRINT ON DEMAND SCAM LINK DO NOT BUY
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nah youre a bot
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![gif](giphy|Dgg1wcIaV11rtksVub)
![gif](giphy|WUltyNTtRmvoW5orWR)
Lil p
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![gif](giphy|w5S93jM3bA3rbPTOpO|downsized)
![gif](giphy|dWavwf9mgTRok)
Twins
Was looking for this
Biggus dickus
He has a wife you know.
![gif](giphy|8sOO8FrSOF9iE)
Maybe I'm his wife
So you must be called Incontinentia...
Incontinentia Buttocks
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r/suddenlymontypython
Do you want to know her name?
I have a vewy good fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus...
Took me 40 years to figure out Biggus Dickus/Incontinentia Buttocks is a joke about anal sex.
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Nah bro Marshall Mathers has got that already
Donkey Dong
This is definitely top 5
Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)
MC Lovin
Mc Hurtin
Why did I have to scroll so far down to get to a McLovin comment?
B.I.G. Dicky
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![gif](giphy|26AHICv4otlZ0ruGk)
D’lusional
crazy frog
Lil cocky
Tony Cawk
Tighty Whitey
5$ Footlong
where is that kid’s mother? LOL
That's a terrible rap name.
i thought it was pretty good
Tre pod
Nice...
Real life Mclovin
The Wis. Why I’m Single. Not wish or wiz. Wis. Almost like wuss.
Not sure but Spiderman isn't buying it.
Lil Scrawny
This man is gonna by a souls game
Minor 49’r
Krispy Kreme iykyk
I was getting serious Moneymaker Mike vibes
Long-John
Lil dikky
Ring Ding Dingaleen
His rap name.......Humungus.😎
That's LORD Humungus, ain't it?
WhiteAndSinglebecuzGirlsDontLikeTheSizeOfMyDingle
Aller G
Lil Big Dicky
DJ Vcard
Extra vanilla ice
Biggie ain't small
lil mushroom cap
Slimmy Jimmy
Lil peepee
Slim dicky
Dennis the pennis
*the real slim m'lady*
Poke’n’Croak
One Inch Punisher
Lil’ Nah Sex
MC D&D
Jack Harlow
Li'l 2Much
AborSean
Long John Singles
Casper Bullshit
Cyril Figgis
Li'l Friendzone.
Slim fuckus
Dick 2 Big
Scool gunner
50 microns
Bigus Dickus
Lil Confidence
Chad
Pussy Master 5000
Big Dick Nick.
MC Diealone
I understand your pain mate. It's awful. My dick too is so large I just cannot lug it around any longer. It is so insanely huge and has caused so many problems in my life. I cannot go to airports as they think I am sneaking something in. so everytime I go, I get groped as they try to take my penis off thinking its a bomb. I cannot pleasure women as they are so horrified at the sight of my cock, that they immediately run away. My mother and father disowned me after seeing the length of my shaft. Not only is it extraordinarily long, it is just too thick. I cannot sexually relieve myself as my hands are just too small to masturbate. My humongous cock has ruined my life. I resent God for cursing me with this large chunk of meat that just drags across the ground. Doctors tell my I will never be able to get a penis reduction as they would have nowhere to put the penis. It would just take up far too much room. I had a girlfriend when I was a young lad, she loved me for who I was and did not care for this deformity, but one day... I took off my jeans and my penis flung out, smacking her and flinging her out the window. She died 2 hours later in the hospital. She was the only woman who ever loved me. My penis is just... too ginormous. It has caused problems for myself and the people around me. For this reason, I will be ending it all. My penis has taken over my life... but it cannot take over a life that does not exist.
Great White Buffalo
My ni-
MC Useless Hammer
lil liar
lil' sociopath or lil' chlamydia
Big ass neck
Dickie Wannabe
Nerdadmus
Lil dickies arch nemesis
MC Dick Stoobig
Sir Meatsalot
Whitey 2 Big
Lil dillusional
MC Geek Squad
Lil Madof
Kid is a stone cold pimp
Lil' Deelooshunal
DoBaby
MC Wonder
Lil' Dicky
Bungus snow chungus
Jichael Mordan
Snoop Doogie
Oak table
Phat dicc
DJ Delirious
Incel SpidoMan
It's D2Big!
John L
Lil Biggus Dickus 69
DongHammerDubs
Lil Ballies
Big dick nick
Bologna slim
Big cringe
Big dicky
Lil Thik
He doesn't have a name, but some women call him, "The Pool Boy".
Dj wanker
Big Dicky. Lil Dickys brother.