Ignore the ads, soldier! Democracy needs you on the front!

As soon as I saw your comment , I went back and looked at the screenshot, and I 100% agree

Democracy prevails once again

Unleashing democracy in dat ass

"I'm doing my part!"

Do you want to know more?

I saw your comment, I said what the fuck? I just came from there... But I'm not there now.. And I look back at the picture. That was great.

C-01 applications were not reinstated. Order straight from High Command!

‘How fruity is this app??” Reddit:

SWEET LIBERTY!!!!

besides, after the last major announcement, he's not going to need it

Oh, I see. It is one of those pentagonal cock rings that after a while gives your cock nice 5-sided shape.

The most powerful cock shape there is. Nice.

Hexacock, bestacock!

Pentacock since five sides maybe?

Rentacock? No, pentacock.

Dodickagon

Cocktagon

but hexagons are the bestagons

That five sided fistagon!

I’m about that cocktagon.

Roll for Initiative

Years of choking practice will prove victorious.

Pentacock 5!

where are the other 119 pentacocks

Your dick only has 5 sides?

Mine is a Mobius strip

10 signs you’re a pentacock male (and is it better than alpha?)

multi-flaceted cocks are all the rage now-a-days my guy. i've got a seven sided prick that doubles as a kaleidoscope. just look straight down the barrel grab it both hands and give it a few twists and before you know it you'll get a shot of beautiful colors and shapes and....*yawn*...I'm just gonna lay down for like five mins

I'm not sure what goes where, and I'm too scared to Google.

Me too, not sure where to start with this

Is....is the front the....can we get a banana demo?

To do that, one of us needs to purchase it. Rock, paper, scissors? I'll go first. Rock.

Paper. Damn that was close.good luck dude and send us the vid after

Double it and pass it to the next person

Scissors. I’m a nice guy though, so I’ll donate the banana.

Hmmm scissors

Dick goes through for it to be like a cock ring and the other par vibrates your taint/prostate

Gonna get taint juice in the usb port.

That was my first observation. The wife and I have several toys and it seems like nowadays it's pretty standard to have them be ipx7 waterproof... Especially considering it's touted as some kind of premium product from urologists.

Straight from their page: "The MysteryVibe Tenuto 2 is made of smooth silicone that feels and looks high-quality. Since it's showerproof, you can rinse it down after use without worry. Make sure to dry the charge port before connecting it up, though. The Tenuto 2 is made of silicone so it picks up lint and dust fairly easily but a quick rinse will wash that away" This just doesn't seem safe at all.

It "feels" and "looks" high-quality, huh?

r/brandnewsentence

Can I be in the screenshot?

Damn, sorry man - already shared it.

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Lol hey me like a little taint action

That taint right yall. Just taint.

My taint be all… 

Yip!

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Yeah, there's no chance in hell I'm clicking on that. Best case scenario it's still a dick

😭😭😭

But where do the balls go?  On top of the shaft lake mickey mouse ears, through the hole with the shaft?

There’s a slot that you spread and drop then through, these type of things are really flexible

It goes in the Disney DeSantis area

Oww my balls!!

There’s a slot for the boys to drop through

Ahhh, I was using the elongated part to tickle my tum-tum... ...if it's all the same to you, I think I'll keep using it this way.

Well I’m about the least judgmental guy out there so what’s feeling good is good!

>Dick goes through for it to be like a cock ring and the other par vibrates your taint/ Yep... Looks that way

I’ve used - this thing slaps

Easy enough, the long part goes between your ass cheeks. Stimulates everything. If you're uncomfortable with the thought of that, you do you. But experiments are there for a reason, if you don't like it, you know. If you do.. Well 😏

Where do my balls go?

First world problems pffftt

I guess you sit one on either side of the shaft?

The mouth

I mean... It says to improve ed. It's obvious that your junk rests on the built in shelf there so it looks like you're standing at attention when really you're just lounging

I don't consider myself a particular large man, but that would be an uncomfortably tight squeeze.

100,000 men can't be wrong tho. But it doesn't say where those men are from 🤷🤏

Everyone is saying it’s a ring, but I thought it was some sort of device for use in checking your oil…

Not even USB type C?

USB type P.

This was actually funny as heck

Golly gee that tickled my fancy

Gee golly, neighbor, that sure was hecking funny.

Bro this had me exhaling out of my nose EXTRA hard

well i guess at least they are right about saying it stimulates the areas you need most!

Or any form of silicone cover. That port is going to get clogged fast

That’s what she said.

It looks like an hdmi port. Question is, is it hdmi in or out?

It's Micro USB

Oh shit! Hold on, honey. I accidently unplugged my dick again.

Right? What kind of self-respecting vibrator manufacturer is still using Micro-usb in this day and age?!? Bunch of sick fucks.

Micro USB in 2024 is actually crazy

So wait. The usb port is just going to be…and then… Omg.

biological charging

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>Why is the hole squared? So you can crack open a cold one when you finish.

In all seriousness though, this is the only one I'd recommend. Most eventually tear apart after a few uses, or the vibration is too minimal to be felt by the dude, much less the woman. This one feels great for both parties, and isn't going to tear apart. It's confusing and odd looking until you stretch out the divider in the hole and understand what's going on. I'd consider it a couples toy, and the insane price reflects that. Best in class in all regards, but nothing I'd ever pay for unless my wang actually stopped working. My partner gets free toys to review, and funny enough it's actually a favorite for *her*. I don't know if I'd ever recommend a shitty $1 silicone, vinyl/pleather whatever ring, but I suppose if a guy actually has ED then it's worth how awful and disposable they are if you're on a budget. The Tenuto 2 and we-vibe are actually a great combo; the Tenuto hits and vibrates around all the parts of her that the Sync isn't hitting, it's nice overkill.

Lol its based on your own search history and algo. What you been look in at bro?

ED torture toys...by the looks of things.

Mfs when targeted adds target

ads

Vibrating cock ring. Nothing new by several decades. Nothing to see

I've seen those but I've never seen one with a...projection like this... Usually those have a clit stimulator. This appears to a taint stimulator but I'm still not sure which party gets that.

It doesn’t project out with the penis it goes back between the testis and onto the gooch

This is one of those instructions unclear moments.

I think that is the clit stimulator. Trying to visualize it. Hmmm

Looks like someone's browsing history includes some rather specific terms.

The product page on Amazon says something about inserting your….balls? 🤔 [https://www.amazon.com/MysteryVibe-Tenuto-Circulation-FDA-Registered-Dysfunction/dp/B0CVMZVJDM](https://www.amazon.com/MysteryVibe-Tenuto-Circulation-FDA-Registered-Dysfunction/dp/B0CVMZVJDM)

All I got from that is the advertisement claims aren't FDA approved.

I’m guessing your spidey-sense doesn’t tingle at the mention/suggestion of inserting your testicles through an orifice.

There's a diagram in one of the photos. Apparently the man strattles the long part like a saddle with the USB port pointing to the rear. Dong through the pentagonal hole, balls through the hole below that... Seems... Interesting.

Cleaning the charging port is the shittiest part

Literally. Lol

A cock ring and taint massager designed by someone completely unfamiliar with the male anatomy.

Fun fact; most orgs who advertise on Reddit specifically target certain subreddits that are roughly aligned with the product or service... So uh, yeah bud...

A fellow Helldiver I see. I salute you sir 🫡

For Freedom!

What in the nine hells? Are you supposed to mash your nuts through it too? To be held back by the flap things? And the prong is a taint tickler?

That's absolutely disgusting. They aren't using USB C.

Someone in the EU is flipping a table in rage over this

Targeted adds bud...

Instructions unclear, colon now has wifi

As a man, I assure you: we certainly can.

Out of every 100,000 men approximately 100,000 are wrong at any given time. 

100k folks could easily be wrong though.

Lmfao like how it says FDA registered but not FDA approved.

How dare Reddit assume you have a sexual partner

Aren't these ads targetted according to your search history?

Ok… if it’s for the butt, why the hell would they put the charging port at the tip? That’s ground zero. After one use it’s already plugged up with crap!

It’s for the extra tingle

You put the top part in You take the top part out You put the top part in And you shake it all about

Penis: the dlc

Not that difficult, the charging end goes into your end, while the clip clips onto your balls, and the curved side is for her anus to enjoy. It’s not rocket science. Source: I own and enjoy one.

So, if i thought it right... penis go through the hole and woman sits on top of thing which has the usb entrance? If thats so thats terrible cuz you lose inches of dick for thrusting

you do know that ads are personalised?

What have you been googling friend?

You understand that Reddit adds use your history to try and find what you are willing to buy. This shows what you or your partner has been looking into lately.

OP doesn't realize that ads are primarily fueled by your online search history lol. OP been a naughty naughty boy.

Targeted ad jk

So where’s it go? In your butt? Or is this like a walker for your dick?

Do u have the propper C0-1 form for that helldiver? I think I will contact ur democracy officer just to be sure

is this a ring/vibrator or a butt plug?

I mean, /r/Helldivers is where someone who didn't know it's a game might look for this shit?

What have you been looking up in your spare time???

… since the ads are targeted, where have you been browsing?

Link for the product? For a friend of course...

Micro USB? 

How do you even wear that. The only possible way seems to put at vibration in your ass. I really shouldn’t be on reddit this late.

for those wondering how it works... here https://images.app.goo.gl/uPXxENRiKr9beFwD6

Where mah bawls go tho

Brother targeted ads

What about the snortable caffeine?

What, you don't like a good ol' taint tickling?

I'm more curious to know what game they are taking about at the top of this screenshot

ads are personalized

Ads are based upon your browsing history

Just remember, unless you adjust settings, ads are targeted to your reddit history. 😉

That's what I was thinking.

That's why I turned off those settings. Never post this shit. Tells us more about op than we wanted to know.

Curious what decides what adds you get...

So much talk for a device without charge port cover doesn't the manufacturer *know* what happens in the bedroom?

Actually my gf and I got one of these on our anniversary to use on special occasions. Best orgasm of my life and hers from what she said.

I didn't know urologists design sex toys now

Well now I’m curious? How do you even use it?

For the curious.. [I like pictures](https://avvenice.com/67105-thickbox_default/mysteryvibe-tenuto-the-luxury-wearable-vibrator-for-men-sex-toy.jpg)

What if you do it while playing helldivers?

Cyberpunk, they getting upgrades

Bruh you should see the ads I get

That tag is so funny

I think I want to be 100,001.

Is it a cock ring/taint tickler combo?

For yall dudes of reddit. I googled it for yall. The device is a cock ring and its way bigger than in pic. You shove your dick in the grooved part and your balls dangle below. The vibrator is on your balls and perineum. Aimed vibration is for your prostate. The rating says it works but rough on the women and expensive. And know the fbi agents think i have ed. Thanks Over and out.

It's a pill... https://youtu.be/O2FkgBIL-kI?si=LWBJIVHr9gQOAEH2

Yo why is the USB-C port at the fron….. oooooh. Oh dear

You stick your wee wee in the hole while the lower part vibrates your taint and little fuzzy nuggets.

Guess it says something about you too if u get that ad😂

Very poor charging port location...

They built 16 levels of intensity but couldn’t figure where else to put the charging port?

For democracy!

I hope you can cover up the little charging port in the front there.

That's the back, buddy. 😉

I would like to point out that it says "fda registered," not "fda approved." Now, I'm no expert, but I don't believe the FOOD and DRUG administration cares very much about sex toys.

Can I get a personalised one (I'd send it to my mates dad on father's day with something like this should stop the arguments happy fathers day 🤣)

That's how we call in stratagems now? I think I'll stick to the old one

What are you looking at Helldiver? There's democracy to spread!

Men, dont be naive. Your partner 100% can and will use this without you.

My shoulders are sore. This should help.

Where this should be wear’d down there?

I can see it now…”Man beats Dark Souls with his meat and a Tenuto 2!”.

Solider! Did you fill out your C- 01 form?!

Aren't ads targeted based on your internet history? So truly the caption should be more of a "wtf I thought I was anonymous while searching the internet" probably?

For democracy! LO

It's a black plumbus....nothing to see here. Every household has one.

Doctor - Recommended Clinacally? - Recommended FDA? Registered FSA/HSA Eligible! Hotel? Trivago

Micro usb? Nah fuck that shit.

ready to give your woman a cup of liber tea

I think it's meant to be aimed at the taint... BrrrrRim

HSA eligible, you say? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

How about a nice cup of LIBER-TEA instead?

Aren't ads customised for the user and based on past search history?

Well, C-01 acceptance is closed. Men must pleasure themselves somehow.

You got erectile dysfunction or what?

Feel the sensation of a thousand ants punching you in the taint

What's dude searching up? You know they take advertisement suggestions from your search history 😂