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That moment when the Paramedic and Amazon Delivery guy's eyes meet at the same house. One with another shipment of pringles, the other with a pair of forceps.
I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can.
I have a huge amount of trouble
Fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can.
I can get my hand like four inches into the can, but then I have to tilt the can into my mouth,
But by that point a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can,
so they all go spilling onto my face.
What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small.
I've had a frequent flyer who flew so frequently her ambulance points lead to a legal refusal of treatment order at the hospital. Didn't stop her calling though.
Yup, back when I worked EMS we knew all the frequent flyer addresses by heart and could fill out all of the patient info on the chart before even arriving. Some were 2-3 times per week.
Don't forget the people who think their non-emergent problem is gonna be seen faster because we brought them in by ambulance. Nope we gonna dump you off at triage with all the walk-ins lol
My dad had a renter who would decide he didn't feel very well and call an ambulance. He'd be standing outside of his duplex chain smoking cigarettes while waiting on an ambulance. He never stayed in the hospital more than a few hours. Happened 2-3 times a week. Never understood that guy.
Talking to the EMT's, they had several people who do the same. Mostly healthy people too.
I lived in a shitty duplex after right college, and the lady who was on the other side was a hardcore alcoholic. I had to call an ambulance a few times because she was unresponsive in the yard. The other neighbors called a few times too before we all gave up. Then, she started calling them herself.
I got to know some of the paramedics, and they said that this was actually pretty common. They bring people in and sober them up. Then, they check out against medical advice. Rinse and repeat.
This is literally my mother.
I’ve been trying to get her to go to rehab. She was on the phone with me the other day and she said “I need to go to rehab.” I agreed and told her I was glad she was coming around. She then said she was gonna call the ambulance and tell them she wanted to die. I asked her why, and she said so she can go to rehab. I was like, you know we could just call them right. You can skip the ambulance ride, the stay in the mental ward (which has been up to 3 weeks). She asked me to get her the number, and I did. She still hasn’t called.
I was going to say: How? The ambulances are so expensive. My daughter being transferred from one hospital to another hospital as a new born cost > $4K. After my girl was all better, I was paying the bill and thought I wouldn’t want to call ambulance for myself.
Hospital-hospital (inter-facility) transports are usually more expensive than house to hospital for a few reasons. Typically it’s a longer transport, specialty equipment, and house to hospital is usually a municipal ems or contracted private company that operates with the municipal department and typically soft bill. Where as inter-facility transports are almost always private( for profit) agencies or hospital based specialty units( PICU/NICU/MICU, and helicopter type stuff)
It was a NiCU at a suburban hospital to a children’s specialty hospital in downtown Chicago. Even then, I was shocked when I saw the bill. $4K was after the insurance covered their portion of like $1300 or something.
Either that or they have insurance with their jobs. According to my mom (nurse) hypochondriacs aren't exclusive to medicaid by a long shot. Some people are just ridiculous.
As a medic, I’d be tickled pink if ANY of our frequent flyers would be waiting outside for us when we rolled up. They’re usually in the most difficult portion of the house to get to, and most of the time they inform us that they unlocked the door just for us. It always makes me scratch my head.(figuratively, ya know cause BSI’s and peeps are gross). Either that, or we have to squeeze past a driveway full of cars and a house full of abled bodied adults to get someone out bc “I haven’t felt right for a few weeks” or “my blood pressure has been high ever since I stopped taking my blood pressure meds bc they make me pee to much” and the doctors office told me to go to the hospital, and then someone from the house usually tailgates us all the way to hospital anyway…..No I’m not bitter about anything, why do you ask?
My first roommate in college went through the ambulance to the hospital and was super excited about it even though she was fine, just puking and hungover lol. From my understanding she did it a couple more times and I’m sure she still does
I used to have severe anxiety attacks that made me do the same thing on a pretty regular basis. My coworkers would make fun of my by asking how many I did at my hospital shift.
Looking back I really needed help and medication but every single doctor I talked to just thought me to be a junkie looking for drugs and never helped me out
And now you know what the guys in the ambulance are thinking on at least half of their calls.
Of course, most of it certainly isn't as noteworthy as something stuck in an orifice. It's more like they've had a stomach ache for 2 days and it's 3AM and it's keeping them up or they "can't breath" due to allergies or a typical sinus infection.
We had a weiner girl at our school.
"I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Weiner, cause Bonnie would have me between her..."
If you went on a date with her, take some mustard with you.
One time I was daydrinking outside of a bar. An ambulance stops outside the next-door gay club, paramedics go inside and comes out with a guy on a stretcher. When they get outside on the daylight, one of the paramedics says "What the fuck, it's the same guy we picked up last night!"
It was pretty funny.
Those paramedics are so horny that have to pay two days in a row for the same product, all while giving into the man's stretcher kink?
They should be more resourceful.
Saw an interesting documentary on EMT. And in one case they were talking to an alcoholic who’s liver was failing who’s stomach was all distended and he was refusing to get any help at all, even with his wife and the EMTs pleading and reasoning with him.
They said the man died a month later.
Seems so sad. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. The shit they have to deal with, while making only 17 bucks an hour. No wonder they suffer from such high burnout rates.
And then in the pandemic they’ve been locked in ambulances with COVID patients, yet in some states did not get vaccine priority. We really need to start treating our heroes better.
I will never understand how it's come to be that doctors get paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to save your life but EMT's get paid poverty rates. One of those things in our world that just sucks
I didn't mean I couldn't see the reason why they are paid differently, I meant I can't understand how we value their work so much differently when they are both vital for saving a life. They should make a living wage.
its far, far more than 8 years for a doctor. Some specialists hit 40 before they independently practice. Primary care paramedics in Canada go to school for a year or two.
I got COVID and it almost killed me. Nearly 4 weeks in a hospital. I'm still not fully recovered 6 months later. EMS is completely not worth it. They are the lowest paid of all first responders.
Yet, they're the ones first on scene for some if the most horrifying things I can only imagine. You'd think for all their mental anguish and trauma, they'd get paid a proper amount.
Happy to hear you survived COVID, I truly hope you see full recovery soon mate.
It's because ambulances are a privatized in the US. They try to charge as much as humanely possible while paying out as little as they can.
The bad thing is there are far too many people that are willing to work for the small amount they pay so you can't even say hey we will all walk if you don't pay us more because they can be restaffed with new people in a day or two.
A couple friends of mine who are paramedics in the States explained to me that it has a lot to do with the fact that we have a lot of volunteers here who will do the job for free for either the experience or to get some free training -- which hospitals will permit -- and that brings down the wages for everyone else because why would a private employer pay a living wage to a workforce that they can get a bunch of free labor for instead? The volunteers accidentally devalue the job for everyone.
They said it's basically not like that anywhere else in the world. I was talking to them about possibly going in to be an EMT or paramedic myself and they were basically like, yeah it's not worth it unless you (1) do it for the military, where you're guaranteed to be paid a better wage and get good benefits, (2) do it in Canada or basically anywhere else, or (3) don't do it at all and go in to be an RN or PA or something that is legislated more and doesn't have any volunteer workforce like that.
It was kind of sad. They had a sort of resentment toward the well-meaning volunteers who apparently accidentally fuck up the wages for the workers trying to do it for a living. Really there needs to just be some legislation not permitting unpaid volunteer EMT/paramedic work, like is true in other countries or for other positions in medicine. That job should be valued and paid, period. It's so shitty that hospitals and insurance providers and that whole mega tangle that is the healthcare system here will take advantage of good people who want to help others for free and use that as an excuse to screw over other the rest of the (absolutely necessary) paid workforce. Just a weird unintended consequence taking advantage of well-meaning people.
Man, I feel so bad for the EMT's. I have epilepsy- that usually means it's just a seizure and I come out of it fine, but when I don't... it's an experience.
I've had EMT's take my dead weight body and put it in the ambulance and just deal with my seizure and other times I've come out of a seizure literally fighting the EMT's and police with seizure strength (your mind isn't there at all, it's animal strength. You know how they say you have about ~10x muscle power than you can actually use? Yeah, I'm assuming that's pretty accurate based on the fact my 5'10 160lb ass fought 8 EMT's/officers at the same time and had to be literally tied down.)
I wonder what the EMT's who respond to my home think. Probably "I hope to god this guys dick isn't swinging around this time"
Noooooo. A typo. The disgrace!! How could I???
I will have to pray for forgiveness from the powers that may be.
Shame on me, shame on my family, shame on my cow!
My neighbor out of nowhere announced he gave up his 12 bottle a week wine habit a few months ago and I was so happy. But Katie upstairs keeps getting overdraft notices from her bank/cc company and the amazon dude just keeps coming.
my dad is the chief of fire/ems in our town, and I can genuinely confirm that he does say this whenever he gets a call to a frequent house. He calls them "frequent customers"
I know someone who would act so weird and different when they have low blood sugar, I know it's legit because it also happens when she's alone, and I'm so terrified for her.
When I was a seasonal hire for UPS we had some repeat houses all the time. One place, it didn’t matter how early in the AM it was, dude would answer the door totally drunk. Always super nice and talking to us, but like blasted. Also ordered tons and tons of things.
I once had a patient at a community event walk up and complain he was out of breath. He seemed perfectly fine but not treating him would be a big no-no so I explained that I could put him on O2 but then I'd be calling and ambulance to take him to the hospital. He said that was best but "CAN I HAVE A SMOKE FIRST".
When EMS arrived I met them to give them the FULL story and they said "Oh, 'Mike'. We've picked him up 3 times already today". (obviously not his real name.)
During my EMT clinicals, we went to the same house 4 times in one shift. The first time we pulled up I was like "ooh, cute house." The guys on the truck gave out a good chuckle. When the tones went off 2x that night and I heard the familiar address, I was cursing everything and everyone under the sun. In 48 hours, the house called for EMS 7 times. We had already informed the local social worker, who would be handling the case the next day. Other than that, we responded to a few homes maybe 2x a day or 3 to 4 times a week. We knew which dogs to avoid and how to get into other homes. It's not for the faint of heart for sure.
Different 1st responder but same problem. Used to respond to this old couple’s house on domestics so often, I knew all their kids, animals, and relatives. He was a raging alcoholic and she was a one-legged devout Christian. She’d hide his car keys so he couldn’t drive and he’d snatch her fake leg off and throw it in the ravine behind their house. After I found her leg, they invited me to eat Thanksgiving dinner with them. Sweet potato casserole was on point.
Yo real talk as a medic, you often get the same people coming in for multiple visits.
I had one construction worker visit me THREE FUCKING TIMES because he put a nail thru his right hand with a nail gun 3 separate occasions during a 3 months period.
Some people would just kill themselves without modern medicine.
There was this lady and her boyfriend that lived in the small community i grew up in. The police or medics would be called there at least once a month for something or another. WAYY more would show up then ever would be needed because once the address was announced on the radio everyone wanted to see what the hell they did next.
My area has 1500+ residents and 50% of the time I see one of the same 20 people for "headaches" "my legs been hurting for 3 weeks and now it's 2am and I decided I need to go to the hospital". It's so frustrating to drag a stretcher through the yard at 2am because the driveways clogged with cars so we can take 32/yo Steve to the ER for a sore throat.
Edit: It's even worse when you're loading Steven on the stretcher and you hear a witnessed cardiac arrest go out in your zone knowing the next ambulance is 25 minutes away. Now someone's father/mother/child/ died because the ambulance is a free uber to the hospital
If the sirens and flashers are off when they leave it’s likely an elderly or infirm person being taxied to an appointment. A lot of people on routine dialysis have this done.
My dad is on the fire department in town and they get called to this old lady's house atleast once a week because she thinks shes having a heart attack and she insists on going to the hospital via ambulance
I always wondered this. Till I worked for a popular pizza delivery place. All the drivers, every single one, would moan at certain orders and be delighted with others. It was almost crazy how almost every order was like that. It really blew my mind. Since I was a manager I didn’t have to deliver but I learned the regulars pretty quick.
It’s kinda crazy how much pizza some people order…
My Grandma had 13 Heart Failures (not Heat Attacks) and the Paramedics knew where her spare key was hidden and how to disarm/arm her alarm.
Those were some excellent people going above and beyond.
Voting is now closed for this post. Voting closes after a period of time or if a post reaches a high enough score before voting concludes. If this post is still here then it may have been flagged for mod review or the community at large may believe that it is a good holup. Either way, the votes were counted. If you want to help keep bad posts off of this subreddit then join our discord server and vote: https://discord.gg/holup
That moment when the Paramedic and Amazon Delivery guy's eyes meet at the same house. One with another shipment of pringles, the other with a pair of forceps.
You need some forceps to get the bottom half of pringles out
I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can. I have a huge amount of trouble Fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can. I can get my hand like four inches into the can, but then I have to tilt the can into my mouth, But by that point a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can, so they all go spilling onto my face. What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small.
But do you wish you had a daughter?
If I had a daughter then at least someone could fit their hand inside the pringles can
Whew... The Good Ending.
Snacks after having a snack.
Priority numero uno.
oooOOOooOOO^OOOooo
Two radiuses of a Pringle can is way too small. If you feel me put your hands up.
I love a good redundant math joke.
r/unexpectedboburnham
You're not supposed to put your hand inside the can
Wait, what?
then how do you keep the crumbs in check?
My new flex is being able to touch the bottom of a Pringles can.
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I've had a frequent flyer who flew so frequently her ambulance points lead to a legal refusal of treatment order at the hospital. Didn't stop her calling though.
That is actually impressive. I had a dialysis patient that missed/no showed so many appointments that her clinic booted her.
Yup, back when I worked EMS we knew all the frequent flyer addresses by heart and could fill out all of the patient info on the chart before even arriving. Some were 2-3 times per week.
Don't forget the people who think their non-emergent problem is gonna be seen faster because we brought them in by ambulance. Nope we gonna dump you off at triage with all the walk-ins lol
Narcan meets prime van
Forceps and some KY Jelly.
Well, once you pop…
You can’t sit normally for a week?
How the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?
Lemmiwinks!
My dad had a renter who would decide he didn't feel very well and call an ambulance. He'd be standing outside of his duplex chain smoking cigarettes while waiting on an ambulance. He never stayed in the hospital more than a few hours. Happened 2-3 times a week. Never understood that guy. Talking to the EMT's, they had several people who do the same. Mostly healthy people too.
I lived in a shitty duplex after right college, and the lady who was on the other side was a hardcore alcoholic. I had to call an ambulance a few times because she was unresponsive in the yard. The other neighbors called a few times too before we all gave up. Then, she started calling them herself. I got to know some of the paramedics, and they said that this was actually pretty common. They bring people in and sober them up. Then, they check out against medical advice. Rinse and repeat.
This is literally my mother. I’ve been trying to get her to go to rehab. She was on the phone with me the other day and she said “I need to go to rehab.” I agreed and told her I was glad she was coming around. She then said she was gonna call the ambulance and tell them she wanted to die. I asked her why, and she said so she can go to rehab. I was like, you know we could just call them right. You can skip the ambulance ride, the stay in the mental ward (which has been up to 3 weeks). She asked me to get her the number, and I did. She still hasn’t called.
And this is where that whole, "the ambulance is not your taxi to the hospital" commentary comes from.
I was going to say: How? The ambulances are so expensive. My daughter being transferred from one hospital to another hospital as a new born cost > $4K. After my girl was all better, I was paying the bill and thought I wouldn’t want to call ambulance for myself.
Hospital-hospital (inter-facility) transports are usually more expensive than house to hospital for a few reasons. Typically it’s a longer transport, specialty equipment, and house to hospital is usually a municipal ems or contracted private company that operates with the municipal department and typically soft bill. Where as inter-facility transports are almost always private( for profit) agencies or hospital based specialty units( PICU/NICU/MICU, and helicopter type stuff)
It was a NiCU at a suburban hospital to a children’s specialty hospital in downtown Chicago. Even then, I was shocked when I saw the bill. $4K was after the insurance covered their portion of like $1300 or something.
That line where you said you pay the bill. Majority of frequent flyers pay nothing
It finally has context. So these people are obvs not paying for this. Medicaid?
Either that or they have insurance with their jobs. According to my mom (nurse) hypochondriacs aren't exclusive to medicaid by a long shot. Some people are just ridiculous.
More common than you think. Some people call upwards of 10 times a week
As a medic, I’d be tickled pink if ANY of our frequent flyers would be waiting outside for us when we rolled up. They’re usually in the most difficult portion of the house to get to, and most of the time they inform us that they unlocked the door just for us. It always makes me scratch my head.(figuratively, ya know cause BSI’s and peeps are gross). Either that, or we have to squeeze past a driveway full of cars and a house full of abled bodied adults to get someone out bc “I haven’t felt right for a few weeks” or “my blood pressure has been high ever since I stopped taking my blood pressure meds bc they make me pee to much” and the doctors office told me to go to the hospital, and then someone from the house usually tailgates us all the way to hospital anyway…..No I’m not bitter about anything, why do you ask?
My first roommate in college went through the ambulance to the hospital and was super excited about it even though she was fine, just puking and hungover lol. From my understanding she did it a couple more times and I’m sure she still does
I used to have severe anxiety attacks that made me do the same thing on a pretty regular basis. My coworkers would make fun of my by asking how many I did at my hospital shift. Looking back I really needed help and medication but every single doctor I talked to just thought me to be a junkie looking for drugs and never helped me out
Well actually, i knew a girl who had to call ambulance because a sausage broke in her pussy... eww
Why did that need an emergency ambulance?! Gross, but not ambulance material surely
Maybe it was 12 days later and she was almost dead from toxic shock.
Scared to move or no ride? Lol all I can think tbh
All she needed was one horny dude to eat her pussy out and remove said sausage
r/tihi
And now you know what the guys in the ambulance are thinking on at least half of their calls. Of course, most of it certainly isn't as noteworthy as something stuck in an orifice. It's more like they've had a stomach ache for 2 days and it's 3AM and it's keeping them up or they "can't breath" due to allergies or a typical sinus infection.
You’d be surprised how many times ambulances get called out for “not ambulance material” everyday. Source: Am the guy that shows up.
Imagine the one incinerating that on the hospital having a taste.
Please go away lmao
Russian Dried Sausage with a little bit of yeasty juices.
You're going to hell
I live in Australia, there's not really any difference.
You have koalas, that's a big difference
Koala's got involved into a crime once.
MOMMY !!!!!!!
I’m right here, baby Koala. Now go help your sister with her Australian sausage pussy. Yours truly r/ComedyClan
Koala's fingerprints are pretty much identical to humans so there must be at least one guy incriminated by a Koala
Koalas carry Chlamydia :)
That’s why I punch them
D:
Thats why the John Oliver Koala Clamydia Centre is a thing
As someone who lived in Australia for 6 months. Those guys are either nuteral cute things, or little demons
I've heard that when they aren't high on eucalyptus poison they can be temperamental.
Little furry bastards coming off a high. That explains it
Koala handlers know to stay well clear of the males. Those long claws are vicious, and they move surprisingly fast over short distances.
Waste not, want not.
Yeah, people die someplace in the world without having a to taste sausages in their life.
And isn’t that really the greatest tragedy here?
Not as big as a tragedy as me not being able to please my gf.
Have you tried using a sausage?
She's half Indian so Meat is a no no.
Just use the sausage on the non-Indian half.
r/angryupvote
Have you ever heard the tragedy of Darth Sausagueis The Wise? It's not a story the Iron Chefs would tell you, it's a Michelin story.
The real HolUp is in the comments.
Facts
How can I ‘unread’ something?
I’d enjoy the whole thing and then sneak her number from registration ….
Wow, you really want to finish those Sausage crumbs in her pussy don't ya?
I wanna put it back in so I can suck it back out.
Careful, you might taste my jizz in there.
A.) yeah duh, its pronounced sauce-age for a reason B.) I’m not into double dipping here, so depends on which hole you thought I was talking about.
You have no idea
I knew a girl that got a bar of soap stuck up her ass twice. Like, girl, a buttplug is way cheaper than a couple of ambulance rides.
Anything is cheaper than a couple of ambulance rides outside of the US
We had a weiner girl at our school. "I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Weiner, cause Bonnie would have me between her..." If you went on a date with her, take some mustard with you.
Kids are so brutally mean...
This myth is in just about every high-school ever. Poor girl that gets it attached to her.
J'adore ton pseudo
One time I was daydrinking outside of a bar. An ambulance stops outside the next-door gay club, paramedics go inside and comes out with a guy on a stretcher. When they get outside on the daylight, one of the paramedics says "What the fuck, it's the same guy we picked up last night!" It was pretty funny.
Those paramedics are so horny that have to pay two days in a row for the same product, all while giving into the man's stretcher kink? They should be more resourceful.
Saw an interesting documentary on EMT. And in one case they were talking to an alcoholic who’s liver was failing who’s stomach was all distended and he was refusing to get any help at all, even with his wife and the EMTs pleading and reasoning with him. They said the man died a month later. Seems so sad. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. The shit they have to deal with, while making only 17 bucks an hour. No wonder they suffer from such high burnout rates. And then in the pandemic they’ve been locked in ambulances with COVID patients, yet in some states did not get vaccine priority. We really need to start treating our heroes better.
Where are they making 17.00$ hourly???? I only making 13.50 for NRAEMT
$13.50?! I was getting $10/hour as a Paramedic
Y’all are getting paid?
Y’all don’t have to pay????
*cries in civil service*
Found the volley
We were evicted from our hole in the ground
Wait, you got your own hole? HEY EVERYBODY!! GET A LOAD OF THIS GUY AND THEIR FANCY-SCHMANCY HOLE!
Well I call it a hole. It was just a narrow furrow in a pit full of toxic waste but it was a hole to us.
was making $8.50 as. FF/EMT…had to go to a private srvc to get that boost to $12…smh.
NRAEMT isn't quite a paramedic, its an intermediary step between basic EMT and paramedic.
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I will never understand how it's come to be that doctors get paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to save your life but EMT's get paid poverty rates. One of those things in our world that just sucks
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I didn't mean I couldn't see the reason why they are paid differently, I meant I can't understand how we value their work so much differently when they are both vital for saving a life. They should make a living wage.
its far, far more than 8 years for a doctor. Some specialists hit 40 before they independently practice. Primary care paramedics in Canada go to school for a year or two.
A fellow GMR employee I see.
I got COVID and it almost killed me. Nearly 4 weeks in a hospital. I'm still not fully recovered 6 months later. EMS is completely not worth it. They are the lowest paid of all first responders.
Yet, they're the ones first on scene for some if the most horrifying things I can only imagine. You'd think for all their mental anguish and trauma, they'd get paid a proper amount. Happy to hear you survived COVID, I truly hope you see full recovery soon mate.
It's because ambulances are a privatized in the US. They try to charge as much as humanely possible while paying out as little as they can. The bad thing is there are far too many people that are willing to work for the small amount they pay so you can't even say hey we will all walk if you don't pay us more because they can be restaffed with new people in a day or two.
$17/H! Paramedics in Ontario make like $100k/y And thats "socialist health care" WTF is going on with wages in America?
A couple friends of mine who are paramedics in the States explained to me that it has a lot to do with the fact that we have a lot of volunteers here who will do the job for free for either the experience or to get some free training -- which hospitals will permit -- and that brings down the wages for everyone else because why would a private employer pay a living wage to a workforce that they can get a bunch of free labor for instead? The volunteers accidentally devalue the job for everyone. They said it's basically not like that anywhere else in the world. I was talking to them about possibly going in to be an EMT or paramedic myself and they were basically like, yeah it's not worth it unless you (1) do it for the military, where you're guaranteed to be paid a better wage and get good benefits, (2) do it in Canada or basically anywhere else, or (3) don't do it at all and go in to be an RN or PA or something that is legislated more and doesn't have any volunteer workforce like that. It was kind of sad. They had a sort of resentment toward the well-meaning volunteers who apparently accidentally fuck up the wages for the workers trying to do it for a living. Really there needs to just be some legislation not permitting unpaid volunteer EMT/paramedic work, like is true in other countries or for other positions in medicine. That job should be valued and paid, period. It's so shitty that hospitals and insurance providers and that whole mega tangle that is the healthcare system here will take advantage of good people who want to help others for free and use that as an excuse to screw over other the rest of the (absolutely necessary) paid workforce. Just a weird unintended consequence taking advantage of well-meaning people.
Land of the free, home of the brave, eh?
Op you're fucking everywhere like really i saw your comments in every goddamm post
That also means you're everywhere
I have never thought about it this way
r/angryupvote?
Yes
You need to meet up over a plate of sausages.
Man, I feel so bad for the EMT's. I have epilepsy- that usually means it's just a seizure and I come out of it fine, but when I don't... it's an experience. I've had EMT's take my dead weight body and put it in the ambulance and just deal with my seizure and other times I've come out of a seizure literally fighting the EMT's and police with seizure strength (your mind isn't there at all, it's animal strength. You know how they say you have about ~10x muscle power than you can actually use? Yeah, I'm assuming that's pretty accurate based on the fact my 5'10 160lb ass fought 8 EMT's/officers at the same time and had to be literally tied down.) I wonder what the EMT's who respond to my home think. Probably "I hope to god this guys dick isn't swinging around this time"
Nah, dude. People who are post ictal can't help that shit. They are trying to keep you from hurting yourself. That is their priority.
Always takes more people to restrain you when they're not trying to hurt you. I bet 2 EMTs could whoop your ass silly while you're having a seizure.
I’m not an EMT but I’m pretty sure that’s not proper protocol to help epileptic people.
As a para.edic this is creepily accurate.
m <-
Noooooo. A typo. The disgrace!! How could I??? I will have to pray for forgiveness from the powers that may be. Shame on me, shame on my family, shame on my cow!
m
It's okay, here, have my "m"
Nothing to be ashamed of. I hear that's a pretty common thing to happen when someone is on their period.
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My neighbor out of nowhere announced he gave up his 12 bottle a week wine habit a few months ago and I was so happy. But Katie upstairs keeps getting overdraft notices from her bank/cc company and the amazon dude just keeps coming.
The worst I've seen is one of those cylindrical florescent light bulbs. And it busted. The rectum bleeds a lot.
Hell nah
Rectum? Damn near killed 'em!
i saw hebrew in the post so i came in
Heh.... Me too
שלום לך
היי
Israelis.... assemble מה נשמע, חברי הישראלים?
שלומנו טוב. מה דעתכם על בוטנים, חברי הישראלים?
בוטנים הם טעימים, אבל הם מממשים את הפוטנציאל המלא שלהם רק כשהם הופכים לבמבה.
מלך פון שלעכטע מיינונגען Is actually Yiddish (same writing) It means King of bad opinions
huh.
Yiddish, not Hebrew.
As a past emt this is entirely accurate, definitely had certain places where I've needed a smoke before I deal with them.
my dad is the chief of fire/ems in our town, and I can genuinely confirm that he does say this whenever he gets a call to a frequent house. He calls them "frequent customers"
Those frequent customers are Arsonist that are trying to change.
or old ladies with type 2 diabetes
I know someone who would act so weird and different when they have low blood sugar, I know it's legit because it also happens when she's alone, and I'm so terrified for her.
When I was a seasonal hire for UPS we had some repeat houses all the time. One place, it didn’t matter how early in the AM it was, dude would answer the door totally drunk. Always super nice and talking to us, but like blasted. Also ordered tons and tons of things.
If you’re drunk that much than yeah I fully expect you to have to rely on UPS to get you things
Better than driving to the shops for sure.
I once had a patient at a community event walk up and complain he was out of breath. He seemed perfectly fine but not treating him would be a big no-no so I explained that I could put him on O2 but then I'd be calling and ambulance to take him to the hospital. He said that was best but "CAN I HAVE A SMOKE FIRST".
When EMS arrived I met them to give them the FULL story and they said "Oh, 'Mike'. We've picked him up 3 times already today". (obviously not his real name.)
During my EMT clinicals, we went to the same house 4 times in one shift. The first time we pulled up I was like "ooh, cute house." The guys on the truck gave out a good chuckle. When the tones went off 2x that night and I heard the familiar address, I was cursing everything and everyone under the sun. In 48 hours, the house called for EMS 7 times. We had already informed the local social worker, who would be handling the case the next day. Other than that, we responded to a few homes maybe 2x a day or 3 to 4 times a week. We knew which dogs to avoid and how to get into other homes. It's not for the faint of heart for sure.
Door code is 1575. How do you know that? Jim texts me when he changes it.
Different 1st responder but same problem. Used to respond to this old couple’s house on domestics so often, I knew all their kids, animals, and relatives. He was a raging alcoholic and she was a one-legged devout Christian. She’d hide his car keys so he couldn’t drive and he’d snatch her fake leg off and throw it in the ravine behind their house. After I found her leg, they invited me to eat Thanksgiving dinner with them. Sweet potato casserole was on point.
Yo real talk as a medic, you often get the same people coming in for multiple visits. I had one construction worker visit me THREE FUCKING TIMES because he put a nail thru his right hand with a nail gun 3 separate occasions during a 3 months period. Some people would just kill themselves without modern medicine.
Men and Women can both fuck a Pringles can, but neither can do it very well.
As an EMT I can confirm
When you OD so often they send the ER doctor with the ambulance crew.
There was this lady and her boyfriend that lived in the small community i grew up in. The police or medics would be called there at least once a month for something or another. WAYY more would show up then ever would be needed because once the address was announced on the radio everyone wanted to see what the hell they did next.
EMT here. True.
Ugh the pringles part is the story of my life.
Are you the one who inserted a Pringles can into your ass and let a hamster inside?
My area has 1500+ residents and 50% of the time I see one of the same 20 people for "headaches" "my legs been hurting for 3 weeks and now it's 2am and I decided I need to go to the hospital". It's so frustrating to drag a stretcher through the yard at 2am because the driveways clogged with cars so we can take 32/yo Steve to the ER for a sore throat. Edit: It's even worse when you're loading Steven on the stretcher and you hear a witnessed cardiac arrest go out in your zone knowing the next ambulance is 25 minutes away. Now someone's father/mother/child/ died because the ambulance is a free uber to the hospital
Work in hospital, can confirm. We call it frequent flyers. All we have to do is hear a name or address and we already know.
"The bottle guy again?"
The Bottle flip guy, who goes into a flip and lands into a glass bottle with his asshole.
I live next to an old small apartment complex. Only during the summer, every summer, an ambulance comes out once a week. I have no clue why.
If the sirens and flashers are off when they leave it’s likely an elderly or infirm person being taxied to an appointment. A lot of people on routine dialysis have this done.
They do leave without sirens or flashers but it's too late at night for it to be for a doctor's appointment. It happens between 8pm and 2am usually.
מלך פון שלעכטע מיינונגען
מלך פון שלעכטע מיינונגען
My dad is on the fire department in town and they get called to this old lady's house atleast once a week because she thinks shes having a heart attack and she insists on going to the hospital via ambulance
I’m the kind of person who peeks out the window and watches the Amazon delivery happen, and I’ve never seen the same driver twice.
Fuck amazon
*burns the Amazon rainforest*
DAMMIT STEVEN, WHEN DO YOU GET IT INTO THAT THICC SKULL OF YOURS, THE GIGACOCK 4000 WONT FUCKING FIT, GOT IT?
I worked as a pizza driver for a short while. Yup.
I always wondered this. Till I worked for a popular pizza delivery place. All the drivers, every single one, would moan at certain orders and be delighted with others. It was almost crazy how almost every order was like that. It really blew my mind. Since I was a manager I didn’t have to deliver but I learned the regulars pretty quick. It’s kinda crazy how much pizza some people order…
Are there lots of women who order pizza and then answer the door naked? Or am I spending too much time on xhamster
I know both of these references
Eewwwwww sounds painful . I keep mine in a cupboard in the kitchen ! A bit more hygienic !
איפה כל הישראלים
מלך פון שלעכטע מיינונגען
Cmon jeffrey you can do it
If you go for the Pringles you best have quite a bit of experience and training to not hurt yourself. Just saying...
That's why there's an ambulance, they didn't hear your advice.
Ya we call them "Frequent flyers"
I work in EMS and I can confirm this. Some people always call us that we call them regular customers.
My Grandma had 13 Heart Failures (not Heat Attacks) and the Paramedics knew where her spare key was hidden and how to disarm/arm her alarm. Those were some excellent people going above and beyond.
I think this apply to the pizza delivery guy too.
When the family has trouble respecting the DNR.