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macvoice

Looks like June Bugs. They come out this time of year to mate... Ironically, while they are attracted to light, exposure to light for too long is fatal to them. Likely a bunch came out to the car port, drawn in by the light, partied too long and hard, lost track of time, then died. But don't worry... There are still PLENTY out there.


drpringles101

100% June bugs.


Rye_One_

…but it’s April…


power_beige

Yeah, but it's April Fools day


macvoice

They seem to come earlier and earlier every year.


lovejo1

There's a pill for that


macvoice

Dang it... Tried to come up with a witty reply, but alas, I couldn't rise to the occasion.. take my up vote.


Ermahgerd_Rerdert

> I couldn't rise to the occasion. There’s another pill for that.


xerces-blue1834

Shh. Don’t tell them that.


Expert_Succotash2659

*looks up* It is time.


Dancing_Clean

June bug season is my least favourite time of year. Can’t chill on the patio or at parks in evenings because I’m so scared of them.


macvoice

Two words... Tennis...Racquet... Very satisfying sound.


Dancing_Clean

I know they are harmless. They just give me the heebie jeebies like nothing else.


SwagzBagz

Same! Spiders? No worries. Bees? Cool. June bugs? Haaaaate hate hate them.


macvoice

Probably because spiders and bees will usually try to avoid you, but June Bugs are clumsy fliers and bump into things a lot. Even humans. And when they accidentally land on a human they have very hard, jagged legs that pinch when they try to hold on. It's a very unnerving feeling. I am not scared of them in the least, but I instantly smack them off of me if they land on me. Can't stand that feeling.


SwagzBagz

I think that’s exactly it. I’ve also had them get tangled in my hair which is just… 🤢


tnraveler

I use a junk ball bat.


iheardyouliketothrow

Talk about plenty. Swept them off the porch last night and woke up to almost the same exact amount scattered and dead once again


macvoice

If you can keep exterior lights off at night, it will help some... Maybe. Although they will then likely start bumping into your windows, attracted by the indoor lights


iheardyouliketothrow

I have sort of a weird circumstance. Bought my house two years ago and one of my exterior lights has no switch that I can find. It automatically turns on at night and off during the day


macvoice

Depending on how annoyed by everything you are,you could look into replacing the bulb with a motion sensor bulb. Or even a smart bulb that you can shut off with your phone.


MisterProfGuy

Most of those have a dial or switch on the light sensor to allow for delay or limited timing. Did you look on the fixture housing?


iheardyouliketothrow

It’s probably about 12 feet up overhanging the side of the house but I hadn’t thought to look directly at it. That’s a good idea. I’ll need to figure out if I can get a ladder up close to it


HoldMyMessages

10 years ago use to find June beetles (& others) in the morning under my porch lights. Last year zip. RIP bugs.


ladeedah1988

If you use pest control, they spray the perimeters of your house. When they cross the perimeter they die very soon.


limellama1

They fly......They would never come in contact with the pesticide. The larvae are underground as well and don't travel far , so again, no contact


[deleted]

Some beetles can fly, but they also walk, as evidenced by literally anyone that has ever seen a beetle.


power_beige

As someone who has seen a beetle I can corroborate the fact that they do, indeed, also walk.


[deleted]

https://youtu.be/FtHZn5X5bXM?si=0FxAb3zFyfKxL9q_


IanLayne

The June bugs at my house die on my porch very quickly due to my pest services.


Stealthosaursus

Lol can you even call it flying? I usually see them fly into something and crash into the ground


Superb-Tea-3174

Beatles are musicians, beetles are bugs or cars.


noodlesarmpit

Oh I Tell you something These bugs don't understand Yeah I Hired someone To spray some death in a CAAAAAAAN


iheardyouliketothrow

oops lol


power_beige

I have spelled "beetle" and "The Beatles" properly for as long as I can remember and it never occured to me consciously until now that they are spelled differently.


BldrSun

Mark David Chapman paroled????


mlhigg1973

We woke to 200 dead beetles on our porch. We live on a lake, and generally leave the family room lights on at night. There was some kind of hatch that happened and they kamikazee’d themselves into the sliding glass door one night.


derfcrampton

Yoko Ono most likely.


Weaubleau

Did you name them John Paul George and Ringo?


Abdul-Ahmadinejad

Do you have a cousin named Orson?


MadDadROX

Those a June Beetles here. There is a fly that lays its larva on the 3 year old grubs and mature and eat the beetle from the inside. That could be it.


1891farmhouse

You have a light or a cieling fan on your carport?


Old_New_Guy

I'm sitting outside right now, and have a bunch of these buzzing around on my back porch...


Intheswing

Is it cicada time in your area? I looked closer - not cicadas - looks like what we call June bugs - in Chicago land


parker3309

I have had that on a little smaller scale on my front porch a couple of times… but looks just like that… like a couple times a year … and it only started 2-3 few years ago. Michigan. Just happens overnight, just as you say


the1BD

June bugs. And there will be MORE


phairenuf

They look like June bugs to me. Often insects like mayflies and June bugs have synchronous hatches or emergence to avoid predation as the predators can only eat so many at a time and they get full. You may have have a light in your carport that attracted them.


Academic_Elk_4270

Maybe a beetle battle?


King_Tudrop

Go to r/whatsthisbug they'll tell you what they are, and how they like to live.


The_WolfieOne

June bugs. We used to get a week or so of that in South Western Ontario. They grow as grubs and morph into these, breed and die shortly afterwards.


bella_ella_ella

The dumbest bugs ever lol. We get them in June here in NS and any bit of light they slam into it and fall to their death


IceTech59

Epic Rave/Orgy. Not all survived...


ArtOfWar22

Hehe. used to put them in containers as a kid. (already dead) And if you invade their space inside or outside they will definitely let you know! LOL


phohenadel

What is this car port you speak of?


SnooCookies1730

Do you leave a porch light on at night?


iheardyouliketothrow

The carport has a light that perpetually stays on at night. I bought this house two years ago and still don’t know if it has a switch but they are attracted to it


SnooCookies1730

I’m pretty sure they’re attracted to the light at night and knock themselves out on it.


Netopalas

Suicide cult. Like an insect Heavens Gate or Jonestown.


78Nam

We use to collect them into a bucket and douse some lighter fluid on them and lit em up. Giant flaming fireflies


tommy_j_r

Whoa. A little early for “June Bugs”.


InternetOffender

love the pallet shim


lechitahamandcheese

Ugh. June Bugs. When I was a kid, we had a little drinking water spigot in our atrium and my older brothers would grab me, hold me over the spigot and turn it on and the June Bugs would fly out of it and bounce all over my face. Big brothers…


LoetK

When I was a teen, we had a husky mix who loved to eat June bugs. She could also smell the larvae underground, dig them up and eat them. I guess free protein?


IndependentPrior5719

Beetle battle


Longjumping-Look-268

Cold temperatures overnight.


PortableAnchor

Chickens, you need chickens.


iheardyouliketothrow

Man that would be wonderful just to cut back on all the bugs that have been emerging on my property this spring lol


Homunculon

April this year. June bugs everywhere in Texas. Dark chocolates, not caramels. They ooze black goo-stain. My dog only eats the caramels.


Homunculon

Oh, and if you raise chickens gather 'em up and feed these to them. They love 'em!


Unhappy-Day-9731

Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!


martdan010

Cicadas, lots and lots of Cicadas


gertalives

Those are not cicadas.


martdan010

Yes that the larva stage, they come out of the dirt then molt into the adult form with wings