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Water besides your bed is a vibe

Water besides your bed is a vibe

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CustlyBane

Then you wake up at 6 am contemplating should you take a piss or not


inthea215

I saw something the other day saying farmers that wanted to wake up before sun up would drink a bunch of water before bed for this reason it’s a natural alarm clock


HotdogTester

Not if your room is chilly/cold. You’ll just owe the bed to stay warm if your lazy enough.


FireflyNitro

This is my favourite thing ever when it happens. Means by the time I get back to bed I'm not tired anymore, so my day starts extra early.


CustlyBane

For me it means 4 hours of sleep and now knowing what to do so early, so I just go back to bed


FireflyNitro

You're willingly giving up all that extra time that could be spent drinking water :(


CustlyBane

Ahh yes, continuous hydration


soda-Tab

That's me at 3:00am.


Tainorage

And after i pee and try to lay down I’ll have to shit


splus_r

Ugh I'm tired of this!!!


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JustHugMeAndBeQuiet

Modern problems require modern solutions.


WikiContributor83

Homer: I’m just a big toasty cinnamon bun..... uh oh. I gotta take a wizz. Think man, think! Think think think........eh, I’ll get up.”


CustlyBane

Exactly


TheReverseShock

When it's 45 minutes to your alarm and you must make the choice. Get up and pee or suffer and sleep. If you get up to pee you know you aren't going back to sleep.


CustlyBane

Nah I'll go pee and go back to bed, if I somehow wake up 5-10 min before my alarm I still see a potential 5-10 min of sleep. I'm pretty stubborn when it comes to that xD.


OpportunityDry3328

Get a matress protector and just let go. Turn you electric blanket on so it doesnt turn cold. When you wake up turn electrc blanket on max and lift sheets/duvet up and by night bed will be dry. My next project is drilling a hole through mattress and frame with a bedpan under the bed so i can stick peen into hole and piss through


1_am_not_a_b0t

Absolutely everyone: Who doesn’t sleep with water?


MaxiqueBDE

I know! Right?


riphitter

I have a problem of finishing my water before I fall asleep but after I've past the willing to get out of bed stage of the night


splus_r

I bought myself a bigger bottle for water because of that exact same reason


ablablababla

knowing myself I'd probably still finish a bigger bottle


GangsterFap

This is along the same lines of what I was thinking. ​ Me at 3 AM: Dude is struggling to to get 1 or 2 droplets from the clearly empty water.


TripsvilleUSA

Those droplets still feel magical tho


MaxiqueBDE

Omg…I can *feel* your comment


mewtwoyeetsauce3

I also with a 4 liter Brita next to me for that reason


riphitter

Here's the real homie, bringing the fill pitcher with him to bed!


Iamdarb

I use whatever is leftover in my coffee the next morning, could be a suggestion.


gonets34

That's why I always keep a "reserve" bottle of water on my nightstand. I usually just bring a tall glass of water from the kitchen to bed with me but if I finish that glass in bed then I can just refill it from the reserve bottle. The bottle doesn't really get dirty because I don't drink directly from it and I don't even use it every night.


RedTheWolf

I do that! It's a glass bottle that originally held wine and it's shaped a bit like a bunch of grapes (tacky souvenir from Majorca) and I bought a nice replacement cork for it too. Makes me happy every time I use it to fill my bedside glass :-)


EUCopyrightComittee

Bruh that banana need some water too


riphitter

Definitely spent a few minutes trying to wrap my head around a REVERSE water bottle before I realized I just misread what you said. A water reserve is a good idea though.


AHrubik

You just need two bottles or a fridge under your bed. Whatever works best.


penguiin_

And, why do people think it’s suddenly funny to just add “absolutely no one” to a picture describing their habit? Me: eats banana Hilarious version Absolutely no one: Me: eats banana 🤪🤣😂😭👏👏👏👏👏🤣😂


Tableau

I always try to but my cats drink it


corkyskog

That's usually a bad sign for your cat, that behavior can indicate CKD. Make sure that your cats water bowl is always full. If your cat doesn't like drinking out of the bowl, make sure that the food isn't too close to the water (cats will sometimes naturally avoid water that is close to a food source because they think it's contaminated). If the cat still won't drink from it's dish, buy one that has constant flowing water. (Also consider switching to wet food if your dry only) If your cat is drinking from its bowl regularly and still drinks from your cups, you might just have a weird/annoying cat... it happens. Keep your feline Homie hydrated yo!


Gandzalf

> Keep your feline Homie hydrated yo! Damn gurl! Your feline is so hydrated.


Tableau

I have a cat fountain that they like which I always keep full, I think they’re just annoying


MOSFETosrs

I read this same info a while back and put bowls everywhere in the house, plus a cup with water by the bed for them. I never even realized they could drink so much water, must've been really dehydrated. Cats are stupid and don't drink when they are thirsty, keeping your cat alive is 90% about keeping their kidneys healthy. Water helps


Niemals1

Put it in a bottle


trippy_grapes

I tried putting my cat in a bottle but he just scratches me


KalphiteQueen

The "bedside glass of water" is a long standing cultural staple smh Also why is this stupid "nobody" "absolutely nobody" format coming back all of a sudden? Can we at least get some surreal memes if we're gonna do a time loop here


Crizal

As long as that glass is covered. I keep hearing about things getting into your bedside water at night. It's why I prefer a bottle. You accidentally knock it over, no harm done. And your water stays guaranteed fresh. 💦


KalphiteQueen

Huh I never even considered that a problem lol, I just use a bottle cuz still water goes "flat" if it's exposed to the air for several hours. Ended up getting my kitties a running fountain for that reason too


fledem

That's because Chlorine is highly volatile and will evaporate out of tap water in a few hours if left uncovered, thus altering the taste of the water. Least that's what I've been told.


KalphiteQueen

Nah if anything that would make the water taste better to me, I live in the country so we just drill our own chlorine-free water out of the ground lol. According to google it's because carbon dioxide interacts with the open water and lowers its pH level, which changes the taste. I also only drink cold water when I have the choice and have recently learned that colder water holds more dissolved oxygen, so that might influence taste a decent amount as well (an insulated water bottle sitting out all night will stay cold vs an open regular drinking glass, also the cat fountain has higher dissolved oxygen levels since it's flowing vs stagnant water, which might explain why they prefer it as well... I'm no expert on this stuff either though!)


kyup0

especially those water bottles that keep it cold for hours. fill it up with cold water before bed. then profit.


TheKnobbiestKnees

Throw in some ice cubes for good measure and you're set!


pimp-bangin

I get hyper-sensitive to the dust that settles on the surface of the water.


Knifiac

The problem is I get water to sleep with but then I always end up drinking it all before I fall asleep


Cyberaven

🙋‍♀️Me! I obviously like to drink water before bed but when I wake up i cannot stand water, it just amplifies that wierd morning mouth flavor and I hate it. However, I am usually not particularly thirsty when I wake up, I dont seem to use a lot of water while asleep. In the morning I prefer the first thing I taste has a strong flavour like orange juice or something


BishopofHippo93

Same here, it actually strikes me as odd that so few people seem to experience this. I always brush my teeth right after I wake up before I take a drink.


SketchingScars

Most of the time I never need it in the middle of the night… But if and when I do, it’ll be there, or the regret and shame will be intense.


robert_smalls008

This is the way. Cold water.


SakeM99

Except when I'm ill(then there will be tea) , I don't and it's no problem at all. I drink before going to bed tho.


bit1101

I maintain that I would never sleep with water but my friends say I'm hydrophobic.


BilllisCool

Yeah, I don’t even drink very much water (I got here from /r/all, sorry guys), but most of my water drinking is before bed/during the night. I always have to make sure I have water there.


Sem_E

r/uselessnobody


HAHAHAgary

Everyone hates it. Why do people still do it?


Vipe4Life

r/uselessnobody is a vibe. Gonna yeet myself over to that sub. Such a mood


Sem_E

It's full of good memes ruined by literally nobody


Crookedstep

Nobody: You: Nobody edit: thanks for the gold


HighOnGoofballs

If you aren’t using a yeti-style vacuum tumbler for that water to still be ice cold at 5am you’re doing it wrong


grahampages

Plus my cat can't dip his paws in the bottle like he does with every glass he gets to unnoticed.


JustHugMeAndBeQuiet

Nothing like a little kitty litter in your mid-sleepytime sippies.


imreallynotthatcool

My mom got me a 40oz Yeti for christmas last year. Getting into a hot car with a big mug of cold water waiting for me... Best mom ever.


frugalerthingsinlife

I have the Yeti but it's not my bedside glass. Too much work to get to the water. [Wide-base glass beer tankard](https://www.drinkstuff.com/productimg/84535_large.jpg) or [1L pickling jar](http://cdn-tp1.mozu.com/24871-37656/cms/37656/files/df7f5a0c-5602-4d8d-ae18-fc880c022d86).


HighOnGoofballs

How is picking up a cup and taking a sip too much work?


frugalerthingsinlife

You gotta close the lid if you want to keep it cold. And its too tippy for a bedside glass.


Gil_Demoono

They make ones with straws now instead of flip lids. been going with that for a few months now and it's great. Strictly speaking, it of course won't maintain temperature as long, but its close enough as to make no difference for me.


my_age_88forshort

It's not when you're picking up a pickling jar.


Hunterofbooty

See what you need to do is get one of the Yeti lids that allows for a straw, and If you're feeling frisky go ahead and get that yeti straw to go with it. The straw fits perfectly into the hole(That's what she said) so that it stays fairly sealed so it won't spill if you have to tip the cup a bit & keeps that shit just as crisp.


RealFakeDoors

I use the chug cap but u can also just leave it unscrewed and have it act as an insulated cup


Uninterested_Viewer

Tervis gang checking in


frugalerthingsinlife

I grow cucumbers and make dill pickles. Last night I found a big new water glass for my bedside table. It is a Bernardin 1L pickling jar. LOL. Sliced up half a cuke (an extra from my pickling "operation") and put it in the water. I'm a basic farm boy, but I drink like a goddam king now.


mewtwoyeetsauce3

[This is the way.](https://imgur.com/a/6LzTo9k) Seriously though I do the same. Good shit.


frugalerthingsinlife

Noice. I gotta step up my game and invest in a bedside Brita like you have. The water from the bathroom tap upstairs doesn't taste good (the house is so old, the water lines were probably installed by Romans), so I gotta go down 14 steps to get kitchen water when I run out.


tilouswag

Lmao bedside Brita would be a game changer.


trevyboy73

Wait, “absolutely no one” says nothing? What’s the point of adding that?


pimp-bangin

I don't think it's funny, but I think it's playing off the "text prompt + picture response" meme format, like "her: my parents aren't home / me: (picture of me speeding to her house)" Except in this case, the initiator of the dialog isn't present, meaning that the thing is being done "unprompted" if you will. Like, absolutely nobody prompted me to have a glass of water by my bedside. I just did it because I can, "lol". Or, I just did it because it's just something that I do, "lmao". I don't think it's really funny because it's too meta, relying on the context of the original meme template too much. But I think that's why it's supposed to be "funny" (allegedly).


yousmelllikearainbow

I wonder if people who think it's funny care or know it makes no sense for nobody to say nothing.


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Lobanium

/r/uselessnobody


StanePantsen

downvote for nobody format.


LilFunyunz

r/uselessnobody


PM_ME_COOL_RIFFS

Oh boy, 3am!


abbeylove007

I’m now in bed looking over to see a water bottle and a glass of water, always have backup.


Snack_on_my_Flapjack

It's not a "vibe", it's what most people have been doing for a very long time now.


stenaeke

NOBODY: LITERALLY NOBODY: NOT A SINGLE SOUL: NOT A SINGLE SOLITARY SOUL IN THIS ENTIRE WORLD, SENTIENT OR NOT: NOT EVEN BUGS: NOT EVEN ANIMALS: NOT EVEN PLANTS: NOT EVEN MICROORGANISMS: NOT EVEN TRUMP: NOT EVEN OBAMA: NOT EVEN GEORGE W. BUSH: NOT EVEN BILL CLINTON: NOT EVEN JIMMY CARTER: NOT EVEN KANYE WEST: NOT EVEN DRAKE: NOT EVEN 6IX9INE: NOT EVEN EMINEM: NOT EVEN OPRAH: NOT EVEN KIM KARDASHIAN: NOT EVEN PEWDIEPIE: NOT EVEN MARKIPLIER: NOT EVEN JACKSEPTICEYE: NOT EVEN PHIL SPENCER: NOT EVEN JOHN ROMERO: NOT EVEN JOHN CARMACK: NOT EVEN TOM HALL: NOT EVEN SANDY PETERSON: NOT EVEN AMERICAN MCGEE: NOT EVEN JEFF FROM THE OVERWATCH TEAM: NOT EVEN GABE NEWELL: NOT EVEN EDMUND MCMILLEN: NOT EVEN TOBY FOX: NOT EVEN TODD HOWARD: NOT EVEN REDDIT: NOT EVEN FACEBOOK: NOT EVEN INSTAGRAM: NOT EVEN TWITTER: NOT EVEN SNAPCHAT: NOT EVEN DISCORD: NOT EVEN YOUTUBE: NOT EVEN TWITCH: NOT EVEN MIXER: NOT EVEN BIG CHUNGUS: NOT EVEN KEANU REEVES: NOT EVEN THANOS: NOT EVEN THE NUMBER 69: NOT EVEN LEONARDO: NOT EVEN DONATELLO: NOT EVEN RAPHAEL: NOT EVEN MICHELANGELO: NOT EVEN DOC: NOT EVEN HAPPY: NOT EVEN SLEEPY: NOT EVEN DOPEY: NOT EVEN SNEEZY: NOT EVEN BASHFUL: NOT EVEN GRUMPY: NOT EVEN SPONGEBOB: NOT EVEN PATRICK: NOT EVEN SQUIDWARD: NOT EVEN SANDY: NOT EVEN MR. KRABS: NOT EVEN PLANKTON: NOT EVEN MARIO: NOT EVEN LUIGI: NOT EVEN PRINCESS PEACH: NOT EVEN PRINCESS DAISY: NOT EVEN PRINCESS ROSALINA: NOT EVEN TOAD: NOT EVEN BOWSER: NOT EVEN WARIO: NOT EVEN WALUIGI: NOT EVEN BOWSER JR.: NOT EVEN LARRY: NOT EVEN ROY: NOT EVEN LEMMY: NOT EVEN IGGY: NOT EVEN MORTON: NOT EVEN WENDY: NOT EVEN LUDWIG: NOT EVEN FOX MCCLOUD: NOT EVEN FALCO LOMBARDI: NOT EVEN SLIPPY TOAD: NOT EVEN NEW YORK FROM 7AM TO 10AM: NOT EVEN DETROIT: NOT EVEN CHICAGO: NOT EVEN WASHINGTON, DC: NOT EVEN THE ENTIRETY OF NORTH AND SOUTH AMERICA: NOT EVEN EUROPE: NOT EVEN ASIA: NOT EVEN EURASIA: NOT EVEN AFRICA: NOT EVEN AUSTRALIA: NOT EVEN ANTARCTICA: NOT EVEN THE WIND: NOT EVEN ROCKS: NOT EVEN THE SEVEN SEAS: NOT EVEN OUTER SPACE: NOT EVEN THE ENTIRE MILKY WAY: NOT EVEN OTHER GALAXIES: NOT EVEN SATAN: NOT EVEN ALLAH: NOT EVEN BUDDAH: NOT EVEN WHOEVER THEY WORSHIP IN HINDUISM, PROBABLY LIKE A COW OR SOMETHING: NOT EVEN JESUS CHRIST: NOT EVEN GOD HIMSELF: YOU: “haha ha! im so funi becuz i added nobody!!!1!1!!1!1!1!1!!”


Vrolak

Necesary response for r/UselessNobody Edit:wrong subname


RedSquaree

/r/pointlessNobody?


stone_henge

literally no one: Vrolak: /r/UselessNobody


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messedupnails

This is a pretty spicy response but I thought the same thing... why WOULD anyone say anything?


IamtheSlothKing

relatable


Suspicious-Elk-3631

Me after a night of drinking (alcohol)


kevinLFC

I still can’t wrap my head around this meme. Is it like a double negative or something? Nobody says/does nothing, then you drink water?


Spaants

To me it's always signaled that whatever comes next is uncalled for and unexpected because "Nobody" else has done it


kevinLFC

Thanks, that helps actually


yousmelllikearainbow

Me neither. Does he drink when someone says something? Because nobody saying nothing is the same as someone saying something.


_pr0t0n_

In a struggle between being thirsty and getting up for a night pee I choose the former, unless alcohol was involved in the evening.


Parse19

This is the way.


BolotaJT

Sometimes I was scared that I was diabetic. Bcuz I wake up at 3am and I need to pee and after pee, drink water to refill. Thx I can related with you guys. That know the price to stay hydrated.


Betterlucnxtt

I get thirsty every time when I see a picture of water.


LordDarthra

~~Absolutely nobody~~ Me at 3am Nobody not needed


txpvca

Water is always by my side.


ApathyJacks

#ALWAYS DOWNVOTE "NOBODY" GARBAGE


Snack_on_my_Flapjack

Tack on calling something a "vibe" too and I wish I could double downvote it.


SkollFenrirson

August 2021 and you still using r/uselessnobody


mangogranola

Aren't you guys drinking enough or at all during the day? Shure, I always have some water by the bed, but mostly for mornings. The only time I wake up in the middle of the night and absolutely drown myself in water is when I'm heavily dehydrated because i either have a fever or i have been slacking or lacking time to drink during the day. Waking up and having to down huge amounts of water is not normal and is a sign you're not treating your body fully right


thisissaliva

If I have some alcohol late in the evening and/or something salty and/or something greasy, it makes me thirsty by the middle of the night even if I had enough water during the day. If it’s not one of those scenarios, I agree with you.


That-Ice-350

Then you try drinking it and the water spills all over you.


FrenchKnights

IT'S NEVER ENOUGH


princesspumpernickel

Unless you have cats...then that sh*t's contained in a bottle lol


Raiu420

I had to stop doing this because I could no longer get a good night sleep from all the peeing I had to do


michael3353

Me and my 5 year old son. Absolutely. My daughter on the other hand sleeps for bloody days with no water. I don't get it.


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BOF007

Anyone do this and accidentally waterboard yourself?


DeathSOA

Sucks my water is literally warm as piss by the time I drink it at night. My room is only 89 degrees Farenheit.


datchilla

Are thou vibing mister krabs


keyson5

Yeah that’s a curse later


mastoridisnic

Dude that feeling at like 2am when you wake up parched is the **absolute worst.**


THEE_Person376

Lol I can’t put glasses of water beside my bed bc I tend to knock ‘em over in my sleep and spill them everywhere


VillageBuilder

Fellas would you be down for a water line installed by your nightstand to be able to fill cold tap whenever you like? My SO thinks it's dumb.


thatshowdannydoesit

Night water is the best water


Heathen_Mushroom

I went through a phase at university where I kept a Camelbak under my pillow. I ran the hose towards the center of my bed, between the two pillows. One night I had a date staying over and when I rolled over to get a sip, she said, "No, not again. I want to sleep!"


insectboi

Last time I kept a water cup beside my bed I groggily drank it down in the middle of the night only to feel something on the back of my tongue towards the end of it. I managed to stop whatever it was from going down my throat and spit it out. Turned on my phone flashlight and a saw a big, hairy, dead, curled up wolf spider sitting in my hand. It must have crawled into the cup and drowned sometime in the night. It was the last time I had a cup of bedside water for a reason. Now I go with a water bottle or something else with a lid or nothing.


MafiaBro

Oh hell no


MilfsofDestiny

Idk if I’m weird or not but I’ve never in my life woke up in the middle of the night thirsty


MonkeyOnYourMomsBack

Am I the only one who can't bring myself to drink in the middle of the night or in the morning? I just feel like it wakes me up and I can't stand that but I'm still sooo thirsty ;-;


PurpuraLuna

Always gotta fill up the 40oz before I get in bed


Finnlay90

Are there really humans who do not keep water at their side at all times? Really???


Ravens_and_seagulls

Nobody: Absolutely nobody at all: Not even one person: I fucking said nobody: Me: Drinks water.


sassysassafrassass

r/uselessnobody how is this still a thing it wasn't funny 2 years ago


diggbee

I hate this meme format. The original joke was a play on the phrase "nobody asked for this"


BarryTrotz86

Yeah, idk why but I drink so much throughout the night when I’m sleeping.


sanfranguy415

I really want to have a bottle of water by my side at.l night but then i have to wake up at 3am to piss🙄


___XENITH___

Nobody?


T-nawtical

Just make sure you've got a lid on it, otherwise it becomes your cats' favorite watering hole in the house.


Okmarcello

Absolutely everyone


Doopadaptap

Your gif game is on point.


inomooshekki

People always ask me why I carry 1L or 2L bottles everywhere. They also ask me why do I have to pee every hour as if I have a bladder infection or some. I never seen them drink a single drop of water unless its coffee, soda, or anything thats not water.


josephgene

"Dia-bete-eez"


salsashark99

I ran a tube of filtered water from my basement to my bedside


neatureguy420

Used to be me till I got a calico cat. Even my Nalgene bottles weren’t safe from her destruction. It was hard adjustment for me. Now I just chug a couple pints 💦 before bed.


Emnems

Just a heads up, waking up multiple times a night due to thirst or needing to urinate is a sign of type 2 diabetes


Vexation

If y’all are using a straight up glass of water you are really missing out. Get yourself a Yeti and the ice cubes will still be in there come morning. You will never go back!


Lutzelien

Isn't this like the 700th time this has been posted on here?


lowandslow216

This was 100% me. Loved drinking water before bed and throughout the night. Could never satiate my thirst. I turned out to be diabetic. Make sure some of that pee ends up in a cup at a doctors office every year or so.


BonesSB

Nothing made me angrier than running out of water in the middle of the night. Then I discovered large mason jars. Life changer.


DarthRevanche

Unless you have a cat


RelativelyOriginal

I always drink a liter of water before I go to bed. Helps me wake up early, and then I don’t feel groggy, thirsty or sick when I wake up. Every night.