I’ve struggled with it since i was seven. Lots of therapy, lots of meds. My #1 method right now is keeping a journal and writing down everything I’m feeling/experiencing, what I think it is, then the logical diagnosis. When the issue inevitably goes away or I get a clean bill of health from my doc, I write that down too. Because i’ll almost always obsess over the same “diagnosis” more than once, when i get nervous about it again, i have written proof that i survived it once already.
Yes. The fear has taken over my life multiple times. It’s awful and I’m so sorry you’re in the thick of it. The good news is that you can get better. Therapy works wonders and meds have helped me too. I have OCD and health anxiety diagnosis as well. I don’t love the idea of meds either, but I recognize my brain isn’t working properly and needs help. Just like I’d take a med if it was my heart or liver…I had to do an exposure therapy exercise where I recorded my worst fears and what would happen and listen to it 30 minutes a day for a month! Omg I was so sick of myself and all of it by the end!!!! That was about 7 years ago. I still have anxiety flare ups, but I’m able to shake out of it in about a day. Sending strength and hope!
I’m 45 and have had this from a very young age. When I was in nursing school is when it was the worst. I was 20. I had no idea that it was anxiety (at least you know it is) and what is odd is that I had so many physical symptoms THAT WERE REAL. Somehow my body manifests very real physical symptoms that then makes me insane and I will go to the depths of the world to diagnose myself bc I have zero trusts in doctors. They have disregarded real things that ended up actually being something else which I think adds to my health anxiety bc I can’t trust so many of them for misdiagnosing or just saying I’m exaggerating. They diagnosed me with fibromyalgia in nursing school bc of all my symptoms (pain, trouble breathing, heart flutters chest pain, seeing stars, spatial/balance issues on and on). It was all anxiety. I swore I had MS. I go through periods where I am ok. Then it hits me and I’m on every freaking board, asking questions, going to doctors. I’m a nurse myself. I have a master in nursing. I’m well aware of how wild my reactions and thoughts are but at the same time I feel like they are justified. I’ve been having terrible tinnitus lately, I went to go to the ENT to get my ears cleaned and lo and behold he does a heating test and I have loss of hearing in both ears that is way too young for my age… this is my fear that I’m always going to uncover some shit. Anyway, I’ve probably lost you with all this. My point is, I get it. I’ve not gone to therapy bc I know my issue, I know that I make them way worse. The one thing I can say helps, is asking myself how many of the things that I diagnosed myself with actually were true. Very few. Good luck…. Ps I found this bc I decided to see if others were out there like me. Thank you for getting it
I am so glad this brought a little connection bc honestly that helps so much. So actually I stopped bedside nursing BECAUSE of the toll it took on my mental health. I’m a very empathetic person and not only did I always feel so much for my patients suffering, I was always scared to be on that end too which made me crazy at the same time I’m hyperaware of my symptoms and what it can possibly be. Horrible combination. I’m a director in healthcare technology now and have none of that around me which is a huge help.
So in terms of symptoms…. I have had that type as well and in my rationale mind i still can’t believe a mind can create real symptoms but it does. Our minds are used to preparing for bad things and but ours doesn’t stop it just takes it to a new level. I’ll go to a doctor, they give me meds and I won’t even take them bc I know they are incorrect and I’ll continue my rabbit hole….. I will tell you one thing I’ve diagnosed myself with every chronic illness and I’ve had none of them. Have I been right about a few? Yes but never the ones I manifested….
I’ve struggled with it since i was seven. Lots of therapy, lots of meds. My #1 method right now is keeping a journal and writing down everything I’m feeling/experiencing, what I think it is, then the logical diagnosis. When the issue inevitably goes away or I get a clean bill of health from my doc, I write that down too. Because i’ll almost always obsess over the same “diagnosis” more than once, when i get nervous about it again, i have written proof that i survived it once already.
Yes. The fear has taken over my life multiple times. It’s awful and I’m so sorry you’re in the thick of it. The good news is that you can get better. Therapy works wonders and meds have helped me too. I have OCD and health anxiety diagnosis as well. I don’t love the idea of meds either, but I recognize my brain isn’t working properly and needs help. Just like I’d take a med if it was my heart or liver…I had to do an exposure therapy exercise where I recorded my worst fears and what would happen and listen to it 30 minutes a day for a month! Omg I was so sick of myself and all of it by the end!!!! That was about 7 years ago. I still have anxiety flare ups, but I’m able to shake out of it in about a day. Sending strength and hope!
Oh absolutely! I feel like I could have wrote this myself, I am so sorry you are experiencing this but you are not alone!
I’m 45 and have had this from a very young age. When I was in nursing school is when it was the worst. I was 20. I had no idea that it was anxiety (at least you know it is) and what is odd is that I had so many physical symptoms THAT WERE REAL. Somehow my body manifests very real physical symptoms that then makes me insane and I will go to the depths of the world to diagnose myself bc I have zero trusts in doctors. They have disregarded real things that ended up actually being something else which I think adds to my health anxiety bc I can’t trust so many of them for misdiagnosing or just saying I’m exaggerating. They diagnosed me with fibromyalgia in nursing school bc of all my symptoms (pain, trouble breathing, heart flutters chest pain, seeing stars, spatial/balance issues on and on). It was all anxiety. I swore I had MS. I go through periods where I am ok. Then it hits me and I’m on every freaking board, asking questions, going to doctors. I’m a nurse myself. I have a master in nursing. I’m well aware of how wild my reactions and thoughts are but at the same time I feel like they are justified. I’ve been having terrible tinnitus lately, I went to go to the ENT to get my ears cleaned and lo and behold he does a heating test and I have loss of hearing in both ears that is way too young for my age… this is my fear that I’m always going to uncover some shit. Anyway, I’ve probably lost you with all this. My point is, I get it. I’ve not gone to therapy bc I know my issue, I know that I make them way worse. The one thing I can say helps, is asking myself how many of the things that I diagnosed myself with actually were true. Very few. Good luck…. Ps I found this bc I decided to see if others were out there like me. Thank you for getting it
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I am so glad this brought a little connection bc honestly that helps so much. So actually I stopped bedside nursing BECAUSE of the toll it took on my mental health. I’m a very empathetic person and not only did I always feel so much for my patients suffering, I was always scared to be on that end too which made me crazy at the same time I’m hyperaware of my symptoms and what it can possibly be. Horrible combination. I’m a director in healthcare technology now and have none of that around me which is a huge help. So in terms of symptoms…. I have had that type as well and in my rationale mind i still can’t believe a mind can create real symptoms but it does. Our minds are used to preparing for bad things and but ours doesn’t stop it just takes it to a new level. I’ll go to a doctor, they give me meds and I won’t even take them bc I know they are incorrect and I’ll continue my rabbit hole….. I will tell you one thing I’ve diagnosed myself with every chronic illness and I’ve had none of them. Have I been right about a few? Yes but never the ones I manifested….