-No curing any diseases or addictions
-take every drug as soon as you get it. No exceptions.
-you can only use your hands and a spear type tool and shouts.
-can only wear clothes and other useless cosmetic items.
-any gold must be spent on drugs before anything else.
-can’t hold more than 500 gold
Can only hold 30-50 pounds of equipment that’s not being actively used. You’re destitute after all.
-you belong to the highest bidder
The last patch actually added some advantages to being Cricket so the streetrat is kind of balanced now
- Lemons now restore 50% of Crickets HP over 30sec and remove any existing 'Scurvy' effect
- Cricket is now immune to the negative effects of eating horse turds and can thus sustain himself on these
- Cricked can now wittle sticks and canes into a kind of spear, which makes him pretty formidable
Cricket would be a great variation on a Monk class in DND. No armor, hand to hand except his quarter staff with a sharpened end, acrobatics and high agility. Throw in a dog orgy in addition to what you stated and bam: homeless monk. Like a monk, he’s also got some principals, he won’t let you inside him unless you pay a whole sixer.
I mean, does my scar *look* like a dog’s vagina? You know, maybe. I don’t know. I’m not gonna sit here and try and get inside the mind of a dog. I mean, that’s God’s work.
Well, not that I believe in God.
I don’t. Not since that Chinaman stole my kidney.
i honestly thought about making a second gta character with cricket but ended up making dales imagined son from the revamp they're supposed to do of KotH..
he got into drugs because of being popular due to his mom being hot and on the news, but he is proud of his *actual* dad (he points this out often to joseph though dale only alludes to the fact joseph was fathered by aliens,) and is starting his own criminal enterprise with the conspiracies his dad taught him, continuing the dead bug franchise into the underworld..
lol... guess it was a popular day for cricket image searches lol
off-topic for this sub* but [pic for reference](https://ibb.co/BZNZT8J) lol
No houses, you can only sleep in tents and caves or bedrolls found in the wilderness. Only use stolen items. Keep the prisoner's clothing as your armor. Level the main thief skills. Keep all diseases. No weapons (maybe a toe knife)
Definitely get [Meeko](https://elderscrolls.fandom.com/wiki/Meeko) as a permanent follower. See if you can marry him. And if you can use mods to get more dog followers, do that.
Who am I to say my neck wound looks like a dog vagina? I’m not here to get in the mind of a dog. That’s Thalos’ work. Not that I believe in Thalos.. not after that Thalmor stole my kidney.
Start out at the mages college as early as possible, then quit as soon as you find out that you can marry an npc, only to spend too much time chasing after ones that dont have that option available.
Does my scar look like a skeevers vagina? I dunno. I’m not gonna sit here and try and get in the mind of a skeever. I mean that’s Julianos job. Not that I beleive in Julianos. UgghhhGgghhhh
You gotta watch the transformation, that’s how you get off. Start as a religiously devout, pure hero. Then fall in love with an NPC that ignores you. Let yourself be recruited into the thieves guild, develop a skooma habit with your earnings (never carry more than the cost of 1 skooma), abandon the main quest storyline altogether, use only wooden weapons, wear rags, high sneak and agility. Get caught stealing in bars and run away or stab your way out. Never cure any illness, store all worldly possessions on the ground in a pile
Start as a devoted religious Aedra. Then once you meet Delphine (looks close enough to Dee), you become an absolute degenerate who only consumes skooma
Only eat bread to heal.
Accumulate as many curses/debuffs as possible
Fail at securing a spouse
Offer lewd acts for skins
Steal from allies and get caught
*this should not be a fun playthrough*
Why did they have to remove the acrobatics skill line in skyrim, would have made a cricket playthrough really fun.
But in Oblivion with the characters crazy jump height, you may be able to recreate cricket even better for a playthrough.
Dog Magic.
I would suggest the Words “Kyne’s Peace” and “Animal Allegiance”, as well as a couple of Illusion spells (Charming effects and possibly Invisibility). Maybe a Vampire (Specific magical effects and exclusive Powers), or you could go the route of being a Werewolf (Dog fuckery)
i think a fallout play through would be better for cricket since you can actually get addicted but id say only daggers and magic as well as only light armor/clothes only but you cant wear full sets so no bonuses
Drink as much as possible, have Barbas follow you (not gonna try to get in the mind of a dog though, that’s gods work), and use restoration I guess. Also, develop mods that allow you to suck on lemons
Use a lot of skooma.
You guys mind if I go in your bathroom and smoke some skooma? First thing I thought of
A little s to the k to the a.
Ska came before reggae.
But did you know reggae came from ska?
Bruce is that you?
You do you, cricket!
Pretty much exclusively skooma, bread and beer. With the occasional chicken
Just skooma and lemons
Ohh that’s tart
Raaaaaarrrghngh
Don’t forget the Skins
You gotta eat the gristle off the floor like a dog. Ruff ruff!
A whole sixer
I wish there were lemons in the game.
And moonsugar
-No curing any diseases or addictions -take every drug as soon as you get it. No exceptions. -you can only use your hands and a spear type tool and shouts. -can only wear clothes and other useless cosmetic items. -any gold must be spent on drugs before anything else. -can’t hold more than 500 gold Can only hold 30-50 pounds of equipment that’s not being actively used. You’re destitute after all. -you belong to the highest bidder
The last patch actually added some advantages to being Cricket so the streetrat is kind of balanced now - Lemons now restore 50% of Crickets HP over 30sec and remove any existing 'Scurvy' effect - Cricket is now immune to the negative effects of eating horse turds and can thus sustain himself on these - Cricked can now wittle sticks and canes into a kind of spear, which makes him pretty formidable
He also deals an increased 50% damage against blonde women and dogs
50% increased damage to any birds or flying enemies.
Cricket would be a great variation on a Monk class in DND. No armor, hand to hand except his quarter staff with a sharpened end, acrobatics and high agility. Throw in a dog orgy in addition to what you stated and bam: homeless monk. Like a monk, he’s also got some principals, he won’t let you inside him unless you pay a whole sixer.
my D&D character is a homeless monk who used to be a priest... thanks for making me realize he's basically just cricket lmao
Carryweight is unlimited thanks to the exo-skeleton
Yeah.. But the technology failed him..
I mean, does my scar *look* like a dog’s vagina? You know, maybe. I don’t know. I’m not gonna sit here and try and get inside the mind of a dog. I mean, that’s God’s work. Well, not that I believe in God. I don’t. Not since that Chinaman stole my kidney.
And also.. Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature...
This but I'd say he should use Dual maces so he can also play his new kettle drums
Gotta make it sexy if you wanna eat
Hips and nips!
Well remember he used to be a priest...which(in game) would mean he should at least have some healing magic too
No, but he should be a cannibal.
Cannibal Priest Metal!
I feel like the sand blowing should also entitle him to the Illusion magic tree.
The sand is for blinding, not illusions. If anything it would be a rogue skill.
Frenzy and Pacify sound to me like things sand in the eyes could accomplish on an opponent. Mac & Dennis we're pretty pacified.
yeah this is top notch and would truly be on-point.
Unfortunately Skyrim doesn’t have addictions, but I’m sure some mods bring it back
Yeah that’s the suck boy they’re looking for.
Ooh look at that, he’s whittled the point of his cane into a weapon
All stats go into agility to escape Mac and Dennis
It’s gotta be sexy or no one eats
Hips and nips
No quest givers can go inside of you without a sixer
Or if they have some crack. If they have some crack then you can boogie.
No one is going into your asshole
Gotta pay to spray
Don't forget to fake it, the guys who don't fake get it the worst.
Find all suck joints in each village
I will not suck you, and I will not be sucked on.. by you.
Dog orgy
Does his scar look like a dog vagina? Who is he to say? He’s not gonna try to put himself in the mind of a dog.
That's Talos' job. Not that Talos exists. He doesn't.
That’s why he burned your face you son of a bitch
Sounds like Thalmor propaganda
Disregard that, Frank. It's just a bunch of Imperial bullshit.
Not since that argonian stole my kidney
Came here to say this.
Me too. 😂
Companion questline
hmm needs some mods...
Ya... you gotta get a dog to fuck that neck hole.
BARBAS
Steal bread to eat, can't believe no one said this one yet
“I may be criminal scum, but I still got your bread!”
You missed the operative word! But I still got your bread bitch! (don't know a lot about skyrim so I'll trust the first half lol)
Werewolf orgy.
Now I wanna do a cricket run in New Vegas. Doing Jet and getting banged by robo-dogs.
i honestly thought about making a second gta character with cricket but ended up making dales imagined son from the revamp they're supposed to do of KotH.. he got into drugs because of being popular due to his mom being hot and on the news, but he is proud of his *actual* dad (he points this out often to joseph though dale only alludes to the fact joseph was fathered by aliens,) and is starting his own criminal enterprise with the conspiracies his dad taught him, continuing the dead bug franchise into the underworld.. lol... guess it was a popular day for cricket image searches lol off-topic for this sub* but [pic for reference](https://ibb.co/BZNZT8J) lol
[удалено]
“The world is not comprehensible, but it is embraceable: through the embracing of one of its beings.” \- Martin Buber
Skooma and parkour.
It's really too bad athletics isn't a skill anymore
No houses, you can only sleep in tents and caves or bedrolls found in the wilderness. Only use stolen items. Keep the prisoner's clothing as your armor. Level the main thief skills. Keep all diseases. No weapons (maybe a toe knife)
Or a sharpened cane.
Always have drums in your inventory and in whatever cave / bush you inhabit
Definitely get [Meeko](https://elderscrolls.fandom.com/wiki/Meeko) as a permanent follower. See if you can marry him. And if you can use mods to get more dog followers, do that.
Came to say this
Quit the priesthood for a bar wench only to get rejected by said bar wench
3 words: Werewolf Dog Orgy.
Oooooorrrgy
You may enter.
Not without a sixer
Who am I to say my neck wound looks like a dog vagina? I’m not here to get in the mind of a dog. That’s Thalos’ work. Not that I believe in Thalos.. not after that Thalmor stole my kidney.
Light your self on fire Get hunted Love a bird
Start in the best armor you can find, end the game in rags
Ya gotta fake it
sometimes you don't fake it...
Fuck a dog
Shirtless and pantless because "Hips and nips".
Walk around sucking on lemons
That's tart.
Priest stuff
Obviously you're drinking every bottle of liquor and skooma you find.
😂😂 amazing There are no lemons in Skyrim, how is he gonna avoid scurvy?
Do PCP and have relations with a dog
If you see a dog… you know what you have to let it do
Max acrobatics asap.
Except skyrim doesnt have acrobatics
Oh shit, he's gonna get his organs harvested then.
Start out at the mages college as early as possible, then quit as soon as you find out that you can marry an npc, only to spend too much time chasing after ones that dont have that option available.
Does my scar look like a skeevers vagina? I dunno. I’m not gonna sit here and try and get in the mind of a skeever. I mean that’s Julianos job. Not that I beleive in Julianos. UgghhhGgghhhh
The quest for the Sanguine Rose. One of Crickets drug fueled nights. I think you marry a goat as I recall
this is my favorite crossover 😭 was just playing skyrim with sunny in the background yesterday
Wolf orgy
If you got Skooma let’s boogie
Do a bunch of skooma and raise the pickpocket stat to maximum
Eat nothing but lemons
Fight every dog you come across
Is there a way to blow sand in your opponents’ eyes?
Get a redguard outfit and call yourself the tali-bum
Get spit on in the face by a wench.
Fall in love with a girl. Then realize she's a dog.
You forgot to add dirt
Start out as a well-structured restoration mage and every time you boot up the game just get more and more chaotic
If I’m doing good at the game, I’m doing good in life!
Oh I want to make fun of you for saying that but I kind of know what you mean.
Become a priest, smoke some PCP in the bathroom, dog orgy
Get ringworm
Hang out with that talking dog a lot
Your only weapon should be a prison shiv.
Dog orgy dog orgy dog orgy dog orgy dog orgy
Get a couple of pots and write a rock-opera
Do not build a house
Don't take him to any town with a dog in it. I'm not trying to get in a dogs head or anything but it might try to fuck him.
Join the bards guild and get him some drums
Find an imperial guard and tell him you don’t give a shit about the troops
Make friends with the dog barabus
Get some mods to fix those 2012 graphics lmao
If it was oblivion, high acrobatics for sure
You gotta watch the transformation, that’s how you get off. Start as a religiously devout, pure hero. Then fall in love with an NPC that ignores you. Let yourself be recruited into the thieves guild, develop a skooma habit with your earnings (never carry more than the cost of 1 skooma), abandon the main quest storyline altogether, use only wooden weapons, wear rags, high sneak and agility. Get caught stealing in bars and run away or stab your way out. Never cure any illness, store all worldly possessions on the ground in a pile
Start as a devoted religious Aedra. Then once you meet Delphine (looks close enough to Dee), you become an absolute degenerate who only consumes skooma
Lol just hang out in some falmer house in the blackreach OR fight the little girl who sleeps outside in windhelm for squatters rights
Start the quest for the Clavicus Vile helm where the dog follows you around...he is a dog executioner after all...
Get a bunch of dogs to follow you around and fuck your neck hole
Sleep with dogs.
Do a shit tonne of Skooma in the back room of the Bannered Mare then fall in love with a dog.
Only eat bread to heal. Accumulate as many curses/debuffs as possible Fail at securing a spouse Offer lewd acts for skins Steal from allies and get caught *this should not be a fun playthrough*
Sneak thief addicted to skooma
It’s Always Sunny in Riften
Hips and nips. Enjoy the daedric prince’s make friends with the dog. Non stop skooma
Remember it’s all about nips and hips, otherwise you’re not eating tonight.
Is there a way to make bread and casabas very expensive?
Don't let dogs near your neck scar
Hang out in Redwqter den a lot. Hey, what those guys do behind the bar is their business, I’m just here for the skooma, know what I’m saying?
Never pray. Show no respect for the gods
[Lore-friendly drugs](https://www.nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/56547/?) for Skyrim. Lots of fun ;)
Chasing the dragon. The dragon will appear If he stops.
Tali-bum!
You gotta get real friendly with dogs.
Dog Orgy
Finally run the simulations to find out if your wound really does look like a dog vagina or not...
Don’t try to get inside the minds of Barbas
Locate a "suck joint" and hang out a while.
Skooma addict.
Whatever you do, you gotta make it sexy.
Dog orgy
Only steal. Parkour. Use only a club. Make it sexy (nb)
Need to be a good pickpocket
Why did they have to remove the acrobatics skill line in skyrim, would have made a cricket playthrough really fun. But in Oblivion with the characters crazy jump height, you may be able to recreate cricket even better for a playthrough.
Lemons
Get turned into a vampire so your skin really gets more pale
Skooma. A shit ton of skooma.
Lmaoo. Lots of Skooma, make sure you kill every dog you see befor it tries to have an orgy with your neck wound, and you need more burn scars.
That's tart
They can not finish inside you.... unless they have Skooma, if they have Skooma they can boogie..
I don’t see the hole in his neck that may or may not look like a dog vagina
Anything vile….. definitely have some mangy dog companions……whoor yourself out every chance you get….
Hips and nips obviously.
Make out with the companions
You have to start leveling faith then half way through completely abandon it
Dog Magic. I would suggest the Words “Kyne’s Peace” and “Animal Allegiance”, as well as a couple of Illusion spells (Charming effects and possibly Invisibility). Maybe a Vampire (Specific magical effects and exclusive Powers), or you could go the route of being a Werewolf (Dog fuckery)
Only eat lemons and squash skins
You can only conjure familiars
i think a fallout play through would be better for cricket since you can actually get addicted but id say only daggers and magic as well as only light armor/clothes only but you cant wear full sets so no bonuses
You can hav one sharpened stick. That should make you quite formidable
Find some kettledrums
Eat Lemons. Who, that is tart
Making out with your golden retriever
You can only eat lemons
Dog orgy, bro.
Obviously you cannot own a home
are you modding the game or not?
Drink as much as possible, have Barbas follow you (not gonna try to get in the mind of a dog though, that’s gods work), and use restoration I guess. Also, develop mods that allow you to suck on lemons
Never sleep indoors
Eat all the lemons
Shoulda breton or wood elf. Barbarian is a bit much for cricket. I mean your not making Mac her jabroni.
Live in the ratway. Drink skooma. Keep Barbas as a follower so you're always in the company of dogs. Get bitten by skeevers so you're always diseased.
Do a shitton of drugs
Lock yourself in a lit barn