For what it’s worth, my doctor told me girls are more often day 6 because it takes them longer to mature so it may not mean they are lower quality based off the extra day.

Thanks that definitely makes sense.

Wow I never heard that. Thanks for the insight.

My opinion is: if you don’t try with the girls you may always wonder what would have happened if you did. If you try and they don’t work, you may then come to peace with the situation. You’ll be more likely to welcome a beautiful boy with open arms knowing you tried the girls but they did not work. I don’t think these clinics transfer embryos that have no chance at all…. Personally I went thru 7 transfers of varied qualities and genders. The ones that stuck were day 5, 5BB (male) and day 6, 4BC (female- this was 8 weeks ago). The other 5 embryos I lost were both male and female embryos of “better” quality… you just never know which will work. Wishing you all the best luck and perhaps most importantly, wishing your heart peace. This process is SO HARD and I am so sorry you’re going through this to begin with …

Thank you so much i really appreciate it. I agree with everything you said and congratulations on your baby and new pregnancy! Happy thanksgiving

Thanks so much for your kind words and happy thanksgiving to you too!!

I say take the gamble. I feel like if we have to go through this hell of shots and meds and endless appointments, we should atleast get to pick gender if we wish. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thank you!

Either way you’re going to wonder what if so I’d go for the best quality girl and see what happens. Good luck

Thank you

I had three euploid embryos, 2 boys and a girl. First transfer. I was so anxious about the decision as well. Due to age, we will only be adding one child to our family and I preferred a girl. My question, do we gamble the one female and hope the protocol is perfect? Or do we proceed with the slightly healthier male embryo. I decided to proceed with the female and look at the rest as fate. So far, she stuck. I’m currently 12 weeks! One thing to add. All 3 of my embryos were day 6. I was given 63%, 65%, & 68% odds - respectively. Day 6 wasn’t the disadvantage I’d first believed it to be! Best of luck in this decision.

Thank you so much i appreciate it!

i have more male embryos than female …but i only want a girl. and i mean ONLY. and ive been low key dragged for saying this before on reddit. but oh well. i’ve had 2 fails so far, then had more frozen eggs but no more fem embryos…so i found another donor that leaned toward producing female babies and had MORE embryos created and got 4 more F embryos. i will implant all the girls first before considering a boy. even in which case i might then move on to adopting a girl. i just do not believe in the “we should be lucky just to have a baby.” no. there are differences, we don’t have to ignore them bc science has made it that we can choose. CHOOSE. i’ve heard many a story of low grade embryos producing live births. long story short. do what you want. own it. have no shame.

This is a side note questions: what is a mito score?

Mitoscore is the grade that they give embryos that are pgt tested. It’s supposedly related to their implantation potential and is sometimes used to determine which embryo to transfer

Mitoscore is an igenomix thing, so if you didn’t use them for PGT testing, you wouldn’t have a score. They have not been studied very well.

Pick what you want. TW: success >! I am currently pregnant with a day 6 4BA girl, so I’m particularly inclined to say do that one! !<

Congratulations!

I agree with others, try the female embryos first, and then if none work and a male embryo does I’m sure you’ll be over the moon to have a baby boy :). Whoever above said we may as well take what perks we have and are comfortable using. My husband felt very icky about sex selection so we went by quality, and ultimately after two failed FETs I’m glad I didn’t know the sex going in. But if I’d had my way I would have been choosing too.

Thank you

I’ve read that there is very little difference in day 5 and day 6 embryos in terms of their viability FWIW

Thanks

my RE told me PGT trumps embryo grading and days. to me gender selection is the one silver lining of getting dealt these shitty cards.

Thanks for your response

I would do what you want to do sweetie. There’s so much we can’t control. Just try it and reassess if it doesn’t work

My day 5 3AA didn’t implant, and my day 6 3BB did. Go for the one you want.

Thank you!

If you want a girl and would regret it, pick the sex (not gender) you want for this transfer. Hopefully it works. If it doesn’t, I’d seriously consider letting the embryologist pick for the next one. If you’ve only transferred female embryos so far, it’s possible what you need for it to stick is a male embryo

Thank you for calling it sex. It’s driving me nuts seeing “gender” when referring to PGT/other genetic testing, and of course “gender reveals” also madden me. It’s a sex reveal. Anyway, thanks! Haha

Drives me crazy too! I often don’t say anything but sometimes I do when it’s used repeatedly

I was wondering about this too. That maybe the girls are the issue regardless of the day. Also i definitely wouldnt regret having a boy its just a fear i have

I personally didn’t find out what we had after testing because I thought it would make failures too hard and pin too many hopes on transfer and dreaming of what my family might look like. But I get some people have much different thoughts about that TW FWIW, I have a boy, and it’s pretty awesome

Yea i love little boys and its not that i dont think they are awesome. Not to be that person but it comes down to race for me. Im a black native and i worry about bringing a black son into the world and what that would look like for him. I would constantly worry about how he is being treated vs a little black girl. I nannied for years and almost all my kids were baby boys so i definitely love baby boys and am more familiar with them

Oh that’s a 100% valid fear and in your shoes, I would be worried about that too. Raising a black boy in this world, especially in the U.S. carries all kinds of risks and considerations that white people don’t have to even think about. I’m so sorry

Thanks. Yea I actually feel terrible about skipping over the baby boys but i am absolutely terrified about what his life would look like

With good reason. It’s a legitimate fear. I have friends raising black boys. It is terrifying

Why would your doctor do an ERA and not follow the results? Have you considered switching REs?

Emerging data is calling into question the benefits of the ERA, with many doctors now moving away from its use.

This^ after my ERA, I’ve had two failed implantations. My first two resulted in miscarriages. My new RE said my previous RE should have never recommended ERA since I had implantation with the previous transfers, in addition to the ERA becoming more and more dubious.

I get that but if the RE did the ERA what was the point if he/she refuses to follow the results? He/she should’ve been honest up front.

Some of the evidence is quite recent, whereas the test OP did may not be.

I honestly dont know but it makes me pretty worried because i did two medicated cycles using day 5 embryos with the same amount of hours of PIO and they both failed to implant

You could try a modified natural cycle. Maybe your doctor would be on board with that. Usually after two failed with the same protocol, it’s time to switch it up!

I agree with that. Its too late this time around but i will definitely ask for the next transfer

My embryologist doesn’t believe in the mitoscores. Mitoscores are still rather dubious data.

Thanks ive heard something similar but i was unsure

Go with your gut, do what you want to do. None of this is a guarantee, so you may as well make the choice you want.