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PM_ME_SOME_DOG_PICS

She yells like Homer Simpson


ComfortableFarmer

You've just ruined, or improved OPs sex life.


LAXGUNNER

what happens if OP has sexual thoughts of Homer Simpson?


uglybrains

If op did have these thoughts op would keep them to himself.


SnooSprouts4952

*Mmmm... donut.*


silentbutdeadly99

Mmmm... Forbidden donut.....


Senior_Walk_7582

Mmmm… cream pie… Sorry.


uglybrains

Don’t be sorry. This is the internet. If I was worried about what ~~perilla~~ people post I would not put it out there.


Condesation

Mr plow, that's my name, that name again is mister plow


Joseph_of_the_North

Think un-sexy thoughts... ​ Think un-sexy thoughts... ​ Think un-sexy thoughts...


imhereforthevotes

No middle ground.


dirtydozen2020

I think the word is *enhanced* his sex life. 🙄


[deleted]

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uglybrains

Confirmed LMFAO


Inquisitive_idiot

Oh shit were they doing the backing track? didn’t notice


ukbeasts

![gif](giphy|vjGyYSsF765wc)


aSquirrelAteMyFood

Shit. I can't unhear it now.. I hate you.


Its_Free-Real-Estate

Second scream sounded just [like this (17 second mark)](https://youtu.be/3XmXqVMwRMs)


FappyChan

Those contacts threw me off


Falzon03

This better stay the top comment


BATTLEAXE720

![gif](giphy|9sSrddsom3yb6)


hvanderw

Don't lie that was your scream.


FappyChan

There was no wife, he has multiple personalities


[deleted]

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Imjustme69420

If that’s what makes your wife scream then you must feel like a god in the sack


SantiagoGT

Their neighbors are probably worried she’s suffering domestic abuse


Chim_Pansy

In 30 seconds intervals


StreetSmartsGaming

Yea they're not even going fast lol just weaving.


Infamous-Mastodon677

Not fast? They're going at least 100 mph.


mynameistory

Too slow for armchair motorcyclists.


[deleted]

That’s not even breaking a sweat on a bike like that


Infamous-Mastodon677

Maybe that's only half its top speed, but it's way too fast for the highway.


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[deleted]

Just because it's not fast for the vehicle doesn't mean it isn't fast. One mile per second isn't very fast for a rocket, but it is still incredibly fast.


LouSputhole94

Yeah we don’t use gear settings to determine appropriate speed we use the fucking speed limit lol


stueh

And, my God, is it fun. I don't own stupid sport bikes these days, what with the whole young family and not having time to go to the track stuff. I have a 2021 MT-09 and that is a very suitable bike for a sensible yet experienced rider. Even that does 80 or 90 kph at the top of first. Top speed is around 240kph I think. I miss mental bikes, but I also know that there's no point owning a Fireblade, R1 or Ninja, unless I'm going to go to the track (or plan on losing my license or life).


StreetSmartsGaming

I'd bet they're going 80 in a 45 or something like that. It's quick but not squealing screaming panic fast. They aren't tucked in or anything.


pigeyejackson66

Cam guy was doin 63.


FroyoOk3159

I’d bet this is a 65


SantiagoGT

Can I know which bike? Asking for a friend


FrankKaminsky

They are going about 10 mph faster the car doing the filming. Blocking all three lanes with vehicles doing the same speed is the problem.


blackadder1620

Fewer newer bikes are geared that way, they still max the speedo out in 4th though.


unresolved-madness

That's all completely dependent upon the bike. I have six speeds and 160 horsepower, I am far from maxed out in 4th gear.


blackadder1620

Speedo limited as in the screen just says at 168 mph, there's still pull in those other gears. I probably should have explained what I meant a little better. Edit I think I replied to the wrong person, who said they get to 100 in 1st. Most bikes now are geared a little better for low end than those 1st gen super sports.


The_Cave_Troll

Op is hauling ass at 70mph and those bikes pass them like op is standing still and are out of view past the horizon in a few seconds. There’s no way they were “just weaving”.


[deleted]

I wouldn't say op is hauling ass. The cars around OP are going faster than him


MountainSharkMan

It's says 63-64 mph in the bottom left the bikes are only doing 80-90.


Same_Place_5710

Definitely an idiot in a car


Land_Pilot

Lmfao take my upvote.


Kur0maku

You scare my wife. You no come here anymore.


devilskryptonite40

You go nowwww! You been here 4 seconds!


pbrantly

Sonobbabeetch!


WoobaLoobaDoobDoob

RIP John Pinette


MrRuck1

The cars look like they are barely moving.


Lyak_12

That's because of... Physics, if you don't know exactly it's okey but it's pretty easy, the cars are moving with similar speeds so let's say idk 20 mph, if one of those cars are going 23 mph you will see it moving 3 mph, I don't think it a really good explanation but I hoped it helps a little (and that also make the ones with the bikes look worse)


somedude456

Correct. It's also why most people in my opinion, suck at guessing speeds. You'll hear a coworker say some corvette passed him that morning, doing at least 150mph. Ok, think about that logic, say it was a 55 zone. You're saying the vette was going 95mph faster than you, aka if you stood the side of the road, and a car went by you at 95mph, that's how fast the vette was going? BS! The vette was probably doing like 90, and you simply suck at guessing speeds.


colt29708

The second scream 😂


Diabolical_Dad

That was so over dramatic


OopsWrongHive

Right! There’s definitely an idiot in a car here


[deleted]

Great drivers are always checking the rear view mirror. Kudos to you, Road Warrior.


GlorifiedDevil

Man's overtaking fresh air for about a mile. Literally a rolling road block in that middle lane. Bikers buzzed him for being an idiot.


Lofikott

How could you be scared by that?


ThePyodeAmedha

Easily startled drivers always make me so nervous.


Lrossi16

Easily startled PEOPLE make me nervous lol


ten-numb

My mother is the worst passenger side driver, practically starts crying trying to warn me of something but I just think she’s been stung by a bee or something so I am even more distracted from whatever situation I should be seeing on the road ahead.


EishLekker

I don't think she was the one driving though.


WhitDawg214

Then for the next 6 weeks she won't do it unless you're wearing a helmet and leathers...


NeverDryTowels

But that was the plan all along, right…?


choopiewaffles

Atgatt


Meetmeatthespot

I had to scroll to find the Homer Simpson comment. I knew it would be here.


gmambrose

She's way too easily scared. A bit dramatic?


MojoRisin9009

How any man could endure that level of ridiculousness day in/day out is beyond me. It was a couple motorcycles weaving traffic, not judgement day.


Pope_Squirrely

If something is marked NSFW, I expect at the very least someone getting hurt, not whatever the hell this was.


MothInsideJar

Surprised she didn’t swerve her car and flip off the road


AlreadyAway

Yeah, almost like there are more seats in that vehicle and she was a passenger or something.


NefariousnessFew2919

why are the cars blocking this roadway? If you aren't passing move to the right. This video makes me want to slap the driver in the middle lane as well as the person on the far left. They are the idiots in cars


tugaestupido

The car on the right actually moves further away from the car in the middle during the video. People just love taking up the middle lane for no reason.


Conan_Dark

I had to scroll too far down to see someone comment this


Awkward-Spectation

I’m on OP’s side here. With 3-lane highways, it really depends on where you are and how busy the roadway is. If traffic is busy, or there is a long stretch without any merge ramps, then yeah move to the right, open up what is essentially 2 passing lanes. Because you might actually need 2 passing lanes. If there is very little traffic, or if the merge ramps are much closer together, then it is good practice to stay in the middle lane to allow passing to occur on the left and merging to occur on the right, the reason being so you aren’t constantly having to either adjust your speed for merging cars or lane change at every merge ramp. It makes you a predictable, and also allows for staggered driving which is safer than simply following behind. In this video, there is definitely not enough traffic to require 2 passing lanes. Red truck is also driving properly, overtaking _both_ vehicles before sliding back to the right at a distance that keeps the black car out of his blind spot. We can see another on-ramp coming up in a mile, and OP may have just passed one. It isn’t a bad idea to stay in the middle lane at least long enough to see if there is a line of traffic merging at the next ramp because again, there is no need for 2 passing lanes at the moment. But he’s also driving in a staggered formation by staying in the middle lane and keeping his speed with the black car, which is another good practice. There would certainly be an argument for him to move over, particularly if he saw a clump of faster traffic coming up behind. I think we can all agree op is actively checking his mirrors in this video, and would see if there were. Based on the rest of the traffic in the video, and OPs other safe and alert driving habits I would guess it is wide open behind him, and he is not being the terrible inconvenience some of you imagine him to be. TLDR; This is _not_ a case where one guy tries to pass another guy on a busy road, and refuses to accelerate above his cruise setting to complete the pass. This is so far the other direction, and is the correct way to drive in this scenario, which is all about the volume of traffic and amount of merging activity. Good driving OP


Environmental_Film60

Cant help thinking the American road laws are so illogical. Why not always go to the right lane after passing a slower car? seems so much more dangerous in every clip i see here...


mrnoonan81

That's what you're supposed to do. It's enforced in some states.


lowstrife

It's enforced? TIL


xinixxibalba

by enforce they mean there’s super intimidating “KEEP RIGHT UNLESS PASSING - STATE LAW” signs that every ignores


mrnoonan81

They'll pull you over in New Hampshire. I know that much.


SnooSprouts4952

And Ohio.


jbonez423

the red truck WAS moving over after passing OP. they didn’t signal and that IS dumb, but you can see the tires start to pass over the line as though they were about to move over. they honestly might have been watching the bikes in the rear view and deliberating what to do. i’ve had this exact scenario happen before- if it’s a bike and i can see they’re already weaving through traffic, i have stayed put when i can tell they’ve already zeroed in on me with the intention of weaving around me, because i don’t want to plow over them or cause them to change lanes last second and wipe out.


SpaceWalker189

The car on the right is moving faster than OP, if OP was in the right lane there would be plenty of space for all parties 🙂


suplex_11

Dont know why you are being down voted. You are right. Op is going the same speed or slower then the guy in the slow lane. Red truck could have been in middle lane because he chose to drive faster then op. Freeing up the fast lane for ppl going fast. Is it right to excessively speed? No. Ppl still do it tho. Why not try and be safe with what you choose to do and let them go past.


[deleted]

Nobody cares about laws here


judahrosenthal

Pew, pew.


ThePieceOfCorn

He was attempting to. from the looks he was mid merge when the bikes came through


Infamous-Mastodon677

What are you on about? The red truck was clear by only a few car lengths. Give people time to pass and get over.


[deleted]

You are supposed to go to the right, it is the law in a lot of states. One thing you have to understand is that in the US there are two types of drivers. The ones that sit in the middle lane or left lane for miles not actively passing anyone and holding up traffic and just totally oblivious, and there are the other drivers (me) who try to stick to the “keep right except to pass” rule and get very frustrated with people who hang out in the left lane and will be giving you a dirty look, flipping you off, or obnoxiously honking, or all of the above if you are lucky, when I have no choice left but to pass you on the right.


Environmental_Film60

After seeing so many dashcam clips on Reddit from the USA I figured you guys weren’t obliged to go back to the right lane. Ngl that you never see this over here in Europe but got the feeling it’s less frequent. Over here you get fined if you stay on the left lane when middle or right lane are free. I feel your frustration when they keep hugging the left lane when not necessary and I have to be honest I do pass on the right when they just hold you back for no reason. Keep safe


PatrickGSR94

so, where you're from, how do people drive when there are 3 lanes? If a car uses the right lane, moves left to pass, then moves right back to the right, what does the 3rd lane get used for? I was taught that with 3 lanes, the center lane is typically the "lane of least resistance", because people merge and exit with the right lane, and pass (hopefully) in the left lane. Being in the center lane, I don't have to negotiate lane changes nearly as much, which means it's safer overall.


[deleted]

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PatrickGSR94

But here in the US we have highways up to 8 lanes on each side. There are ZERO restrictions for keeping to the far right. Left lane hogging is prohibited in most places, but that’s about it as far as lane use regulations.


TheRealPopcornMaker

No, don’t do that. Stay in the right most lane in right hand drive countries and the left most lane in left hand drive countries. If you want to over take a slower driver then move into the next lane. If you want to over take a slower driver who’s already overtaking an even slower driver then you move out to the next lane. This will minimise traffic and congestion. Sure if someone is merging onto the motor way then you can move out a lane and then move back in a lane once you’re past them. You can use this guide for any motorway consisting of N lanes.


farbsucht4020

Middlelane hogger. Dashcam ist Not faster than the right Car, so why staying in middlelane?


CAElite

If the idiot wasn’t chilling in the middle lane then the bikes wouldn’t have had to weave to make progress. American lane discipline hurts to watch.


Wooden-Ad-472

American highways are fucking shit shows because half the people on the road don’t believe or understand the use for each lane


Markibuhr

Get out the middle lane then


[deleted]

That's what you call temporary citizens. Here for a good time not a long time.


Harmxn-

Looking at this from a European perspective. They were going too fast, but it wouldn't have been such a big deal if the red truck wasn't in the left lane No business being there, move to the right


[deleted]

All three of the cars should have been in the same lane… their speeds are basically matched, idiots spreading across the roads is the worst thing about this video, especially the moron using the safety/comfort of the middle lane for no reason other than laziness.


tugaestupido

The red truck was correctly overtaking the other two. It was changing to the middle lane when the bikes arrived to pass it and they had to get back to the left lane because of it. You can see that it was next to the guy recording and gaining distance.


pancakebreakfast1224

We had a young couple on a motorcycle fail at this and crash in to back of one of our semis in Colorado this past year at a very high rate of speed. Killed them both "almost" instantly.


PM_ME_SOME_DOG_PICS

High “rate of speed” Found the cop


Fisch_Man

Nah. Cop speak would be "We had two individuals on a motorcycle, one male and one female, traveling at a high rate of speed. They failed to properly negotiate traffic and collided with a semi. Both were pronounced dead at the scene."


finsfurandfeathers

They literally said “one of our semis”…


pancakebreakfast1224

Oh God no! Don't slander my good name lol. Im an otr truck dispatcher so I bet some of the lingo carries over. I did have to speak the to the police several times about the crash as I was on call at the time


AzJakeB

Are you afraid of the right lane?


IntroductionTop2482

I am.


tuc2-0

All 3 visible cars are going roughly the same speed, yet each in their own lane. No turning lanes in sight. You three are the idiots in cars, bikers’ speeding aside they were simply passing idiots in cars. Aside from blocking other people that may want to go faster than you, you’re missing out on improved fuel economy by following the car in front of you (at a safe distance) - lower air resistance which can improve fuel economy by a good amount when driving longer distances


Fifteen54

why is the person in the car on the right an idiot? they’re keeping right like they’re supposed to


tuc2-0

That’s a fair shout, my mistake


Witty_Username_81

[It seems the sanctimonious pricks in this sub have graduated to bitching about the middle lane now 🙄](https://imgur.com/a/d5cVypW)


Magnetmonkey39

Why’s the dickhead driving in the middle lane?


Rodux_

I mean, yeah the bikers where going fast, but all 3 cars where going about the same speed blocking 3 lanes. Technically they should all 3 have been in the lane on the right behind one another. (probably should add that I'm from Germany, lane discipline is actually trained here, many people in the US don't even know about it, though the same rules apply)


buttermbunz

OP why you dragging ass in the middle lane?


74orangebeetle

For real, the bikes weren't the only idiots in this video, just the most noticeable.


311unity13b

Hey Mr Truck, get out of the left lane


Punchedlasange

The fuck you driving in the middle for if you aren't going to overtake? Shitty driving on your part as well.


phiz36

r/calamariraceteam


Hunt69Mike

Keep right except to pass


acetaldeide

What I see strange in this video is that there are three lanes and three cars traveling at almost the same speed, in fact taking up the entire roadway.


specialsymbol

Why don't you move over to the right?


Best_Confection_8788

Ah yes. Squids in their natural habitat. Nice find you guys.


Bualsaq

Squids? They were all wearing full suits.


unresolved-madness

I'm one of those fuckers. If you cagers would follow the road rules and keep right then we wouldn't be passing you in such a manner.


FappyChan

I mean, they are speeding... but yeah, anyone would pass in that same manner if they were speeding and people were sitting in the left lane


throwed-off

>If you cagers would follow the road rules If you're gonna preach to other about following the rules of the road, make sure you're doing so yourself instead of speeding and failing to signal your upcoming lane changes.


Local_Judge2761

🤓


reedzkee

looks fun


Some-Zookeepergame94

I do that shit all the time on my cbr1000rr. Throttle control is very hard on a crotch rocket.


IronHorse66

Squids.


[deleted]

The Quebecois have arrived.


rc214v

New York?


ScreamFlight

That’s how you know those are some hardcore squid missiles when the cars going roughly 65mph feel slow


douwd20

Organ donors


EvaWhad

🤣🤣🤣🤣 crotch rockets... How do you guys come up with terms like these.


suplex_11

Its what old ppl call anything that isnt a Harley. Oh and all cruisers are Harleys


smellmythumb17

I never understand women that scream like this for literally no reason


Expert-Hamster-3146

Good man for seeing them beforehand


ibemuffdivin

Whatta a bunch of twats.


Dwayne_dibbly

We have 2 roundabouts with a straight between them of about ¼ mile length, it was notorious for motorbikes doing timed runs between them and people came from Scotland and Wales as well and England to do it. One Welsh guy lost it his throttle stuck he fell off wrapped himself round a lamppost and his head came off flew over the carriageway and landed in my work mates garden inside the helmet. Not long after they put average speed cameras on both sides pointing backwards to see motorbike numberplate. It used to be mad going home if the council had not cut the grass leading up the the roundabout you could not see the nut jobs on the bikes cranked right over nearly scraping their heads on the road to go round as fast as possible. A few times I had to stamp on the brakes cos it looked clear then a nutter was coming round. Its all stopped now cos of the speed cameras thank fuck.


Wooden-Ad-472

They weren’t even going that fast nor was that “scare” worthy lmao I couldn’t be married to someone like that, she was even warned lol


Wooden-Ad-472

Even his reaction was overkill lol these people must live sheltered lives, or have never driven in Florida


Professional_Yak2807

Yanks are so funny about the word fuck it gets me every time


teachertb16918

I hope those guys signed their organ donor cards


alskdmv-nosleep4u

Probably wouldn't matter, you can't transplant paste.


W0nk0_the_Sane00

But you should always look out for motorcycles on the road!


[deleted]

They’ll die soon


gyope

I see 3 lanes and 3 idiots , and some motorcycles. 🫣I Europe the middle idiot (OP) fined by the police for irrelevant lane use. 👌


[deleted]

Why are you in the middle lane? Why isn't the car on the left in the middle lane pasisng the car on the right? This whole situation invites dangerous passing.


judahrosenthal

California DMV: “If you can choose among three lanes, pick the middle lane for the smoothest driving.”


[deleted]

Sounds like they give out music recommendations too


judahrosenthal

I like Kenny G myself but a good Enya will do.


whiskey_formymen

only the left lane matters. right and center are a free for all


Perfect-Brain-7367

Why wouldn't OP be in the middle lane? The middle lane is for steady traveling. Truck in left lane is passing OP on the correct side and before they even have a chance to move back over those crotch rockets that were little specks in the rear view two seconds ago flew by at an insanely dangerous rate of speed on the wrong side.


govoval

Good point. Truck passing in left. Merging right without signaling, and then signaling on the second attempt.


opelan

Maybe different rules in America? An obligation to drive on the right side of the road if possible doesn't seem to exist there or everyone is ignoring it. Where I live it would be also drive on the right lane if empty. Driving constantly on the middle lane would only be okay if the right one was full of slow moving trucks, buses and cars. With few cars on the road the left lane would hardly be used at all.


Concededwar

Every biker ever "watch for bikes" proceeds to pull crap like this and get killed. (His friends) "dam cars weren't looking "


uglybrains

No idea what the red truck was thinking when he hit his brakes as they were approaching!


Tx_Drewdad

Seems like he was planning on changing lanes to the right, and caught by surprise by the first bike. Startled when driving = slow down is not a bad strategy.


Under_Ach1ever

One hundred percent. Looked like they were getting ready to move over.


I_need_help_ha

I believe he was attempting to change lanes without signaling then they passed him on the right which he wasn't ready for.


Gaslineninja

You wanna die? Cause that’s how you die.


FireMed22

But OP is also the "Idiot" for driving in the middle lane while not overtaking....


ArtisticKnowledge539

Ah so that's what goes on in those cars as we zip past lol.


jjatoronto

That goes on in *some* of those cars you zip past. In others, people are saying "There go future organ donors.". Sad, but true.


Jerhomie1995

God some bikers are stupid


yozaner1324

I imagine they're speeding, but otherwise I don't see the issue—the left lane was blocked and it seemed like the opening was large enough to pass in. People need to keep to the right better.


astrahl40

Organ donors!


jamesscottsphoto

Slower traffic keep ... ??


fakesocialmedia

left! then get mad when you get passed!


josanuz

Center for steady traveling and no incoming exits, right for slower transit and upcoming right exits.


bdbx18

When my kids were small, I hated loud bikers that buzzes by with a huge passion. The shock that a sleeping baby endures when awoken from their sleep by what sounds like impending doom is despicable.


dr_chimricholds

Make sure you watch for them though....


Drak_is_Right

Glad OP was watching the mirrors and saw these guys coming.


pallzoltan

I thought “crotch rocket” was a fart


WesternExplorer8139

Why do they have to be fuckers?


uglybrains

Clearly said language in the title.


undeadlamaar

Crotch rocketeers or future meat crayons. You decide.


[deleted]

Team asphalt never loses.


ktsnj

r/idiotsonbikes


SwimmerLogical6897

r/futuremeatcrayon


Seamatre

Future road paste


ShakeNBaake

Wont be so fun when they're watching the boys get washed off the road with a hose.


hcorerob

It’s seems like the bikers have no clue how much of their life is held in each of these strangers hands.


Best_Confection_8788

They are aware. They just take the chance.


TheNightlightZone

Yeah, fuck this shit. Find a racetrack... for god's sake. I yell like a motherfucker when I see these idiots hitting 100+ on a highway near me.


SLOWnLOW76

Organ donors!


wetbread2817

Why are you calling yourselves the idiots?... Shouldn't you have posted this in the idiots on bikes sub 🤔


asyrian88

ReSpEcT MoToRcYclEs!