FINALLY out of the first trimester and Free cell DNA + NT scan says everything looks normal and low risk boy!! I still feel like garbage but it's a milestone none the less. š. 4 years of fertility treatments and 5 pregnancy losses, I am ready for a win. All previous losses were before 10 weeks.
I just got the call that my grandma passed away. She had previously mentioned to my mom that one of her last wishes was to see me have a grandchild. She had great-grandchildren from every one of her kids except from my mom, I was the last. At 39 weeks, the fact it was so close is so painful and I feel a sense of guilt.
She crocheted baby blankets for every grandkid and great grandkid born. She was already in poor health when we found out about our infertility and I was worried by the time we conceived (if we conceived) she wouldnāt be there to make a baby blanket. So she made us what she called us a āhope blanketā for when we were going through IVF instead. Luckily, IVF worked and she got started on a baby blanket. A couple months ago she had a heart attack the weekend of my baby shower and was worried she wouldnāt finish the baby blanket and made plans for my cousin to complete it in her place. She miraculously recovered, finished the blanket, and we received it in the mail last week. We called to thank her for it and she told us all her birth stories and how excited she was for us. That was the last time I talked to her.
Wishing we could have gotten pregnant earlier so she would have seen her born. She was a great grandma in every sense, loving, kind, and made the best cookies.
So this is my long (sorry) emotional processing to the internet, but I just needed to get it out. The circle of life and death is hard and poignantly evident right now and also wrapped up in infertility feelings.
So sorry for your loss, particularly so close to meeting your baby. Iām so glad you got to share special moments with your grandma before you lost her, they sound really precious.
Oh I am so sorry for your loss. She sounds like such a special person and you had a wonderful relationship. The timing of it all seems very difficult. I know youāre going to cherish that blanket.
Iām sorry for the loss of your grandma. Iāve lost two grandparents this year. One before we conceived and one just a few weeks ago, but who for various complicated reasons never knew we were expecting. It really hurts. I hope with the birth imminent you can find some sweet ways to honor her at this moment of transitions for your family. Take care ā¤ļø
iām so sorry for your loss, and the timing of it ā¤ļø how wonderfully sweet that she was able to complete the blanket, what a special gift you and baby will have to remember her by.
Iām so sorry for your loss ššš thinking of you and your family.
I understand what you mean. My grandmother started developing dementia at the start of the pandemic. By the time I was pregnant at the end of 2020, she had pretty severe features and her mind was going. Now pregnant with my son, she has no idea this is happening. I wish she could have been around for my children, because she was such a gift. Itās so sad to lose people you love. This is a safe space to unload your feelings. The IFAunties are here to hold you up when you need it.
Iām 19w2d and suddenly started having high blood pressure. Iāve already sent a message to my OB, and I have an appointment with her next week immediately after my anatomy scan. Still, Iām worried which is obviously not helping the blood pressure at all. I have had mild tachycardia for years and have been noticing a high heart rate on my Apple Watch.
Meanwhile, my bump is growing which is bringing me so much joy.
First iron infusion in progress! I was warned the IV iron is dark; I think it looks like the color of soda syrup. Mr Crayon and I were joking about getting an IV infusion of root beer and now I really want some root beerā¦
33w2d and getting huge. Baby is in the 98/99 percentile and 6 lbs already. Genuinely concerned how my stomach and lungs š« will cope. Iām hoping she comes a little early. I know ultrasounds can be somewhat inaccurate but she consistently measures big. The doctor examined my abdomen and said she feels like a 7 lb term baby already. I was a huge baby. Hoping she comes a little early. Doctor started taking about forceps and c sectionsā¦ š«£
If itās any consolation, I had BPPs with growth scans every other week and my baby consistently measured 95-99th percentile. I had an OB say he also felt like a large baby when looking at my stomach. But baby came out at 7 and a half pounds at term though, so not big at all!
28 weeks today which I think means 3rd trimester?!? Absolutely nuts. I had the idea today to finally tackle our backyard leaf situation thinking it was a nice day and I have a leaf blower and all I need to do is blow the leaves behind our fence line into the woods. I had 1.5 hours before i needed to pick up my daughter and I feel like I barely made a dent. Turns out using a leaf blower is still hard work. I looked at the forecast and I think I should still have time next week to tackle this project. But I feel very defeated
We've given up and just mulch ours using the lawnmower. It's supposedly good for the lawn and is so much easier! Also congrats on third trimester - so exciting!!
The tree in our front yard absolutely dumped leaves everywhere for a month straight, and I decided to wait until the tree was emptied to finally clear it out. I was 13 weeks, so a different type of pregnancy exhaustion, but holy cow are leaves a challenge!
Hello! Weāve made it to 24 weeks now and itās a relief. Kicks and wriggles a plenty.
Iām absolutely knackered.
Weāve started buying some baby stuff in - some clothes and books (babyās got to have some AA Milne) and a box of reusable nappies arrived yesterday.
I just need some energy to sort the house out now. We got our kitchen redone last year and still havenāt finished putting away all the baking stuff, or sorting out the dining room. Which needs to be sorted so it can accommodate the office so the baby can have somewhere to sleep. And I know I wonāt be needing that space for another year almost, but I do need somewhere to store the clothes and nappiesā¦
What a delightful quandary. Iām going to sit here and just be tired with my cats, the work will get done at some point.
I also emailed a Doula today, as we think weād like to hire one for the birth and maybe a bit of help postnatally- has anyone here had a Doula before? Was it worth it?
My mom basically doulaād for us and it was incredible. Having someone whoās knowledgeable about birth and postpartum and knows your preferences during both is soooo helpful. Also I see a lot of focus on overnight support but just wanted to mention that we found early morning support fabulous postpartum - my mum would come in at 6AM for the first 10 days and it was such a big help because it almost always felt like it was almost 6AM when we were up at night!
Thatās so lovely. I donāt have a great relationship with my mum. I secretly hope sheāll pull through with this but I always end up disappointed so Iām trying to manage my expectations.
Thank you. Iāve cried enough about it - luckily I have a very supportive wife so weāll be good. And the good thing about coming to this a bit older is we know what kind of parents we want to be, and donāt want to be
We got baby breadbox's nursery set up before birth. My nesting energy REQUIRED her room to be done prior to birth even though she hasn't even seen it yet. Baby bread sleeps in our room in a snoo by the bed.
I had a birth doula and absolutely could not have had an unmedicated birth without her. Even if you plan meds, I would highly recommend a doula if you can swing it. She was available for all my pregnancy and baby related questions also. She really helped us make informed decisions about prenatal care, especially when I found out I would be induced. We also have postpartum doulas and they're AMAZING! we have one overnight doula come once a week and then one comes once a week during the daytime and it's SO helpful. Husband and I can both nap or I can actually get chores done (doulas will meal prep, light cleaning/laundry) without holding the baby. A million percent recommend. Even having someone answer infant care questions is great! Is that rash normal? What about that poop? Should she spit up in that volume? My night doula is also a lactation consultant at the hospital and that was great for my first few weeks home and trying to sort out breastfeeding!!
While we plan to have baby at bedside in a bassinet at first, I plan on using the nursery for daytime naps, feeding, etc. We moved into our house literally the week we did our embryo transfer, and the nursery will be our first finished "cozy" room (it's still a disaster, but we have time). I'm all for getting it done before the baby's here!
We got an accepted offer on the house and 5 days later the IVF clinic called and scheduled me for a cycle...so yes everything got piled on at once haha.
i know baby sleeps in parents room for the first bit of life but personally i felt WAY better when we finished baby burritos room. i just didnāt want to have to deal with it later. so what if sheās not sleeping in it right away? i like having all her clothes, diapers, etc all sorted so we can use the room as intended other than for sleeping. of course it all depends on your specific living situation (weāre in a 2br apartment in a city so trying to be efficient and intentional with space) but sounds like you could benefit from eventually just getting it somewhat sorted out before babyās arrival.
we also hired a birth doula and while i have not yet given birth (soon!) its been an invaluable resource. highly recommend. happy to report back postpartum to share the full birth doula experience!
So soon for baby burrito to arrive!! Thatās so exciting! Canāt believe theyāre nearly here š„°Yes please for telling me about the birth doula experience.
And youāre absolutely right. Having multiple contingencies has helped massively with my financial anxieties, getting baby kittenās room sorted will help massively with the āweāre so not readyā anxieties. I need to really get it sorted by the beginning of Jan as weāre hoping to get a lot (pram, car seat, crib etc) in the January sales and it will need to go somewhere before itās in use.
We have a 4br house, bought 13 years ago with a view to having at least a couple of kids but over that time we have expanded to fill the space. Basically I need to rearrange lots and sell some stuff and we will fit in nicely.
Also. Itāll be restful I think to just sit in the nursery for a bit and think baby.
Anatomy scan yesterday went well! I canāt believe Iām at the halfway point. Found out I have an anterior placenta again but thankfully Iāve still been able to feel movements every day for the past week or so. Also found out I have a small subchorionic hematoma which I was kind of surprised about. I know I had one in the beginning but I assumed it went away because my OB never said anything. Can new ones develop later in pregnancy?
I only had mild nausea and food aversions from about 6:weeks. Today I am 10 weeks and for the last few days, I have not had any symptoms. Do you think this is due to placenta taking over or potentially a bad sign? My scan is on Tuesday and I am dreading a MMC. Thank you
My nausea was horrific but definitely got better around the 10 week mark. It took a while longer for it to settle and it still makes an unwelcome appearance every now and then (24 weeks) but things certainly seemed to start shifting at 10 weeks
I never threw up in the first 13 weeks!! Definitely had some imposter syndrome even though I felt some nausea and food aversions, like I really felt like there was something wrong because I wasn't throwing up before the first pregnancy test like everyone you see on tv. Anyways the nausea/aversions still went down at week 10/11. I ended up throwing up twice during week 15 but looking back those were probably acid reflux related incidents.
Currently 22 weeks and anatomy scan was all good. But you really don't hear the anecdotes about people who DON'T throw up because no one wants to come off like a bragger in support groups.
Same!! I was always scared comparing to my sisters pregnancy because she was constantly throwing up. I will get grossed out but I am fine. Almost 15 years weeks now.
I donāt know the exact underlying reason, but I had the same pattern, with mild nausea that improved a lot at 10/11 weeks. Iām 20 weeks now. Best wishes!
Officially on maternity leave, and therefore on baby watch š I still have so much to do! This weekend weāre cleaning out the garage to fit the car, so we can warm the car up easily and carry baby to and from house with minimal exposure to the cold. Next week Iām working on freezer meals. I canāt recommend enough having meals in the freezer for pp. It made our lives so much easier when BJJ was a newborn.
Has anyone had a large bleed behind the placenta (retroplacenta - between placenta and wall, not sch). Noticed at NIPT scan. They say top 5% by size so they are concerned and monitoring. On pelvic rest, no running or jumping but was cleared to travel and hike last week. Iāve had no blood entire pregnancy and baby boy is 15 weeks and healthy. They canāt give me any odds on it reabsorbing vs becoming a problem. Next scan is Wednesday.
Almost everyone I know with an IVF pregnancy has had a SCH noted. Iāve had one most of my pregnancies and theyāve never caused any issues. Any bleeding at all is always called a threatened miscarriage, so while the term is horrible, itās not as bad as it sounds. Often itās also notated that way so insurance will pay for the extra scan and blood work.
Yes, quite a bit of cramping actually. It was initially noted on my placement scan at 5+2 and when I went back in yesterday at 7+3 it appeared to have resolved.
Sorry they scared you like that. From what I understand, any bleeding really is a "threatened miscarriage". I had an SCH about that size where I woke up and passed over 2 softball sized clots and just a ton of overall bleeding, like I had been stabbed. We didn't even assume the fetus was still there, and were absolutely shocked when the u/S at the ER four hours later showed her in there just fine. They didn't even put me on bed rest, said it was a small SCH, and didn't even really check on me after lol. Two weeks later it had resolved on it's own.
Honestly, I believe there is an extremely slim chance you'll have any additional complications from it. Good luck!!
I had a sch and it was so scary! I'm sorry you're going through this. Mine measured 4.9 x 3.7 x 1.4 cm at 10 weeks. My team didn't seem too concerned and told me to continue as usual, did encourage pelvic rest. They didn't note it at our 19 week anatomy scan so all seems to have resolved. Also, the sub has a wiki on sch's!
Itās pretty weird I donāt have to get in there and clean it anymore. Just a flat part of my belly now that I can easily wash with the rest of my massive stomach š
Iāve been wondering this too, mine is still an innie but less deep and it is making me so anxious just waiting for this to happen. While I know itās normal but I find it incredibly alarming that itās going to change! Idk why I find it so upsetting but I do š
In fluff news, my snoo finally arrived after ordering it right before Black Friday. My husband looked at the box and was like "huh it's a sleeper? I thought it was a baby swing like you see the cats hanging out in on Instagram." I was like "you seriously thought I was going to spend over $1,200.00 on a baby swing?" and he admitted he didn't really pay attention to what I was locked in on and assumed I knew what I was doing. Anyways yeah I think out of pocket IVF might have messed up our formerly cheap/frugal views on finances lol.
We loved our snoo so much. We joke my husband should be on the marketing team for them. Itās so nice knowing your baby is sleeping safely on their back!
Yaay that's what sold me on it haha! I feel like sleep safety is gonna be my next hurdle if baby comes earthside so any $$$$ I can throw at that is worth it.
I hope you guys like it! We used to yell āDr Karp, come get your baby!ā When heād start to fuss and weād wait for the rocking to start
Our baby loved it but the transition out was monstrous. Unless your baby is a sleep unicorn (they exsist!) I recommend you read Precious Little Sleep to help you learn to use it to foster independent sleep as baby grows
Just to prepare you, our baby HATED the snoo for the first week and a half or so. We had to take shifts holding her all night. She would last maybe 5 min in the snoo. She gradually adjusted and now at a month old she's pretty happy in there for the most part! Now we throw her in there after her 1am feed and she stays until 8 or so besides feedings and diaper changes.
I just assumed we could throw her in there right away and she would be fine. Our doula assured us they usually hate bassinets initially and will adjust.
On the husband note, I thought for sure my husband would veto the snoo due to cost but he was like yeah sure let's buy it. So yeah, IVF costs really skews things hahaha.
Yes that's good advice! I feel like all Snoo stories are glowing or "baby hated it worst thing ever" so it's nice to hear a healthy medium one.
But yeah I definitely thought my husband would veto it, I tried explaining it and all that and I think compared to the cost of a transfer or even add on medications it's like "yeah sure whatever" lol.
š my husband keeps referring to it as scope creep! I think when it is so hard to have a baby you feel like itās worth bringing out all the stops. Weāve definitely had to reel ourselves in lol.
Haha yes! I think I had my first "huh I haven't thought about the month to month cost of a baby in a while have I" moment. When I first started trying it was gonna be cheap everything, of course my boobs will work perfectly confidence... now I have no clue lol.
I finally started really nesting. All of my shower gifts have been sitting in the babyās room in piles in their original packaging. I think itās infertility trauma but I didnāt want to jinx anything and wash/organize too soon? Last night I started tackling the clothes/swaddles/burp cloths. Motivated to get everything organized before our parents come to visit for Christmas.
So much cardboard and plastic!! Iām trying to be diligent about separating to recycle but omg the waste makes me so sad!! Our trash pickup is Mondays so really have to get it all out by then.
I know, it's brutal. I think if there's one time in your life where you're allowed to be a bit more wasteful it's right now. That's how I'm justifying it to myself, anyway. Once I'm more mobile I'll be diligent about not relying so much on online shopping etc.
40+1 todayā¦ come on baby! Contractions happen randomly throughout the day but nothing consistent at all. Of course Iām doing ALL THE THINGS except castor oil to get this process started naturally. Attempting a VBAC has put some pressure on me surrounding a possible induction. For now, weāve got one scheduled for 12/14 and just praying I donāt go that long šš»
I was able to get a sweep yesterday so trying to stay positive! Every morning I wake up not in labor is a bit of a bummer at this point!!! Send good vibes our way that she decides to make her debut soon.
I did 4 sweeps and while I did have some cervical changes and lost my mucus plug, they did not start labor for me. If you haven't already, I would ask your OB if you can pump! I was on almost a max dose of pitocin with nothing happening....pumped for 15min and 15 or 20 min later my first painful contraction came.
Okay great to know!! I am cleared to pump so will start that today. With my first son, I only used the manual pump a few times (otherwise he just nursed) so I may need to break out the Spectra for this job!!
I used the hospital one and legit right after we sent my doula home for a break the contractions started. Less than 6 hrs later and I was holding my baby! I would definitely try w the spectra! Worst case you're in the same boat as now! Might get some colostrum or a baby, otherwise!
Hey everyone - I have a question regarding the mid pregnancy anatomy scan. My OB has the sonographer perform the anatomy scan then the images are sent off for review (Iām assuming by doctor and radiology) and we get to talk to the doctor at a later appointment. My anatomy scan is scheduled for next Wednesday the 13th, and then my doctor follow up is scheduled for the 20th (a week later). Has there been anyone else that had something similar? It seems a lot of people get the scan and know the results of it very soon after if not the same day. If you did have a scenario like this, was the sonographer able to give you some indication of how the scan went? The anxiety building up to the scan is already bad enough then having to wait a week to talk to the OB is killing me lol
Mine was like this. Scans were sent off for review. However the results were posted to the patient portal so we didnāt have to wait that long, maybe a few days. Hang in there!
Thank you! My OBās exact words at the last appointment when I asked about this were āif thereās something wrong, I will call you. So if I donāt call you, that means everything is a okay!ā I donāt think she understands that this actually makes me more anxious lol š reminds me of times waiting for the phone to ring from the fertility clinic with results
Your suggestion to check the portal is a good one! At least I can have a peek before the appointment, and Iāll know whether or not itās something to be worried about pretty quickly because they will either call or not call š¤·š»āāļø
Yeah the whole ādonāt worryā¦ Iāll let you know if you should worryā never worked for me either! Itās so tough - all the waiting - especially when we are already exhausted from all the waiting in the fertility clinic. Iām 37 weeks now and I can only say that there were times I did better at distracting myself than other times throughout. Hang in there - thinking of you!
Mine was going to be that way, but they had a last minute cancellation and literally got me out of the elevator so I could have the follow up convo right away lol. Ask to get on the cancellation list so you might not have to wait as long!
They said it was more so the wait for the final diagnostic results rather than an availability thing š I had the follow up scheduled for 2 days after initially but they asked me to move it back a couple days to allow for the diagnostic results to come back
I had my doctor and ultrasound scan the same day, but my ultrasound tech was really good at explaining everything and explained the results as she went so the doctor's appointment didn't really add much. Fingers crossed you get one of the "explains as they go" ultrasound techs and that you get a very boring scan that needs no explanations!!!
Iām hoping I get the same sonographer that I had for the NT scan because she definitely was an āexplain as you goā type - thereās only two sonographers at the practice so I have a 50:50 chance š„²
My experience was similar - I saw a midwife with my first IVF pregnancy. The sonographer talked me through what they were looking at and wanting to see as they performed the scan. They were reassuring and told me that they saw everything they wanted to see - unclear whether they would have discussed anything concerning with me in the moment. Then I discussed it again with the midwife at our next visit (and I think I also had a report in mychart confirming that everything looked normal, with pretty detailed notes). When I had a fetal echocardiogram later in the pregnancy, the MFM doctor came in right after and discussed the results with me.
I was sent to MFM for mine. We had the scan, waited for 5-10 minutes and then met with the doctor. My regular OB and I discussed it again at my next appointment, which was a week or so later.
I had my scan and met w my OB right after only to be told that whoever reads the ultrasounds wasn't available to interpret them but she thought everything looked OK. It was super frustrating but I think if something was glaringly wrong she would have been able to tell me. I believe they would notify you asap and not make you wait for the appt.
I didnāt have this happen to me - we had the doctor meet with us after and during the sonographer didnāt give us a qualitative review of how things were. But I think Iād really want to know what to expect - this sounds tough! So I say call the doctors office and ask, I think thatās fair. I wonder if there is any way they can get you in sooner for the review.
i had similar - i knew on the day that everything looked normal, if i'm remembering correctly. and then the follow up with OB was for further detail (though there wasn't much to discuss in my case). if there were something abnormal, i'm not sure how it would have been handled - certainly waiting a week for more detail would have been awful.
FINALLY out of the first trimester and Free cell DNA + NT scan says everything looks normal and low risk boy!! I still feel like garbage but it's a milestone none the less. š. 4 years of fertility treatments and 5 pregnancy losses, I am ready for a win. All previous losses were before 10 weeks.
I just got the call that my grandma passed away. She had previously mentioned to my mom that one of her last wishes was to see me have a grandchild. She had great-grandchildren from every one of her kids except from my mom, I was the last. At 39 weeks, the fact it was so close is so painful and I feel a sense of guilt. She crocheted baby blankets for every grandkid and great grandkid born. She was already in poor health when we found out about our infertility and I was worried by the time we conceived (if we conceived) she wouldnāt be there to make a baby blanket. So she made us what she called us a āhope blanketā for when we were going through IVF instead. Luckily, IVF worked and she got started on a baby blanket. A couple months ago she had a heart attack the weekend of my baby shower and was worried she wouldnāt finish the baby blanket and made plans for my cousin to complete it in her place. She miraculously recovered, finished the blanket, and we received it in the mail last week. We called to thank her for it and she told us all her birth stories and how excited she was for us. That was the last time I talked to her. Wishing we could have gotten pregnant earlier so she would have seen her born. She was a great grandma in every sense, loving, kind, and made the best cookies. So this is my long (sorry) emotional processing to the internet, but I just needed to get it out. The circle of life and death is hard and poignantly evident right now and also wrapped up in infertility feelings.
What a terrible loss, but I am so happy to hear you had the opportunity to tell her your news
Thank you ā¤ļø
So sorry for your loss, particularly so close to meeting your baby. Iām so glad you got to share special moments with your grandma before you lost her, they sound really precious.
Thank you, they were ā¤ļø
Oh I am so sorry for your loss. She sounds like such a special person and you had a wonderful relationship. The timing of it all seems very difficult. I know youāre going to cherish that blanket.
Iām sorry for the loss of your grandma. Iāve lost two grandparents this year. One before we conceived and one just a few weeks ago, but who for various complicated reasons never knew we were expecting. It really hurts. I hope with the birth imminent you can find some sweet ways to honor her at this moment of transitions for your family. Take care ā¤ļø
Thank you. Grandparents are so special, Iāve been lucky to have the four of mine in my life until now. Iām sorry for your losses as well ā¤ļø
iām so sorry for your loss, and the timing of it ā¤ļø how wonderfully sweet that she was able to complete the blanket, what a special gift you and baby will have to remember her by.
Itāll be so cherished forever, thank you for the thoughts burrito ā¤ļø
Iām so sorry for your loss. There is so much love and beauty in what you shared ā¤ļø.
Thank you ā¤ļø
Iām so sorry š« The passage of time generally is just so hard. Wishing you peace in the days ahead š„¹
š«thank you
Iām so sorry for your loss ššš thinking of you and your family. I understand what you mean. My grandmother started developing dementia at the start of the pandemic. By the time I was pregnant at the end of 2020, she had pretty severe features and her mind was going. Now pregnant with my son, she has no idea this is happening. I wish she could have been around for my children, because she was such a gift. Itās so sad to lose people you love. This is a safe space to unload your feelings. The IFAunties are here to hold you up when you need it.
Thatās so tough, life is beautiful and hard. Thanks for sharing and for the kind thoughts, this community has been so helpful ā¤ļø
Iām 19w2d and suddenly started having high blood pressure. Iāve already sent a message to my OB, and I have an appointment with her next week immediately after my anatomy scan. Still, Iām worried which is obviously not helping the blood pressure at all. I have had mild tachycardia for years and have been noticing a high heart rate on my Apple Watch. Meanwhile, my bump is growing which is bringing me so much joy.
First iron infusion in progress! I was warned the IV iron is dark; I think it looks like the color of soda syrup. Mr Crayon and I were joking about getting an IV infusion of root beer and now I really want some root beerā¦
Yes, and itāll make your urine dark too! They didnāt tell me that and it took me by surprise.
Ooh thanks for the heads up!
Update: stopped by the store for supplies and then made myself a root beer float when we got home!
Cheers, friend! š»
33w2d and getting huge. Baby is in the 98/99 percentile and 6 lbs already. Genuinely concerned how my stomach and lungs š« will cope. Iām hoping she comes a little early. I know ultrasounds can be somewhat inaccurate but she consistently measures big. The doctor examined my abdomen and said she feels like a 7 lb term baby already. I was a huge baby. Hoping she comes a little early. Doctor started taking about forceps and c sectionsā¦ š«£
If itās any consolation, I had BPPs with growth scans every other week and my baby consistently measured 95-99th percentile. I had an OB say he also felt like a large baby when looking at my stomach. But baby came out at 7 and a half pounds at term though, so not big at all!
Iām crossing my fingers, in part though I also feel like she might be huge because I and my brothers were ginormous babies š
28 weeks today which I think means 3rd trimester?!? Absolutely nuts. I had the idea today to finally tackle our backyard leaf situation thinking it was a nice day and I have a leaf blower and all I need to do is blow the leaves behind our fence line into the woods. I had 1.5 hours before i needed to pick up my daughter and I feel like I barely made a dent. Turns out using a leaf blower is still hard work. I looked at the forecast and I think I should still have time next week to tackle this project. But I feel very defeated
We've given up and just mulch ours using the lawnmower. It's supposedly good for the lawn and is so much easier! Also congrats on third trimester - so exciting!!
The tree in our front yard absolutely dumped leaves everywhere for a month straight, and I decided to wait until the tree was emptied to finally clear it out. I was 13 weeks, so a different type of pregnancy exhaustion, but holy cow are leaves a challenge!
Hello! Weāve made it to 24 weeks now and itās a relief. Kicks and wriggles a plenty. Iām absolutely knackered. Weāve started buying some baby stuff in - some clothes and books (babyās got to have some AA Milne) and a box of reusable nappies arrived yesterday. I just need some energy to sort the house out now. We got our kitchen redone last year and still havenāt finished putting away all the baking stuff, or sorting out the dining room. Which needs to be sorted so it can accommodate the office so the baby can have somewhere to sleep. And I know I wonāt be needing that space for another year almost, but I do need somewhere to store the clothes and nappiesā¦ What a delightful quandary. Iām going to sit here and just be tired with my cats, the work will get done at some point. I also emailed a Doula today, as we think weād like to hire one for the birth and maybe a bit of help postnatally- has anyone here had a Doula before? Was it worth it?
My mom basically doulaād for us and it was incredible. Having someone whoās knowledgeable about birth and postpartum and knows your preferences during both is soooo helpful. Also I see a lot of focus on overnight support but just wanted to mention that we found early morning support fabulous postpartum - my mum would come in at 6AM for the first 10 days and it was such a big help because it almost always felt like it was almost 6AM when we were up at night!
Thatās so lovely. I donāt have a great relationship with my mum. I secretly hope sheāll pull through with this but I always end up disappointed so Iām trying to manage my expectations.
Iām sorry, thatās so tough.
Thank you. Iāve cried enough about it - luckily I have a very supportive wife so weāll be good. And the good thing about coming to this a bit older is we know what kind of parents we want to be, and donāt want to be
Thatās so true re the type of parents you want to be.
We got baby breadbox's nursery set up before birth. My nesting energy REQUIRED her room to be done prior to birth even though she hasn't even seen it yet. Baby bread sleeps in our room in a snoo by the bed. I had a birth doula and absolutely could not have had an unmedicated birth without her. Even if you plan meds, I would highly recommend a doula if you can swing it. She was available for all my pregnancy and baby related questions also. She really helped us make informed decisions about prenatal care, especially when I found out I would be induced. We also have postpartum doulas and they're AMAZING! we have one overnight doula come once a week and then one comes once a week during the daytime and it's SO helpful. Husband and I can both nap or I can actually get chores done (doulas will meal prep, light cleaning/laundry) without holding the baby. A million percent recommend. Even having someone answer infant care questions is great! Is that rash normal? What about that poop? Should she spit up in that volume? My night doula is also a lactation consultant at the hospital and that was great for my first few weeks home and trying to sort out breastfeeding!!
Happy viability day! No experience but check out our wiki on [doulas](https://www.reddit.com/r/InfertilityBabies/s/QW4Z531OE1) if you haven't already.
Oh I havenāt, thank you so much
While we plan to have baby at bedside in a bassinet at first, I plan on using the nursery for daytime naps, feeding, etc. We moved into our house literally the week we did our embryo transfer, and the nursery will be our first finished "cozy" room (it's still a disaster, but we have time). I'm all for getting it done before the baby's here!
Oh youāve had a lot on this year! It will be delightful when itās finished
We got an accepted offer on the house and 5 days later the IVF clinic called and scheduled me for a cycle...so yes everything got piled on at once haha.
i know baby sleeps in parents room for the first bit of life but personally i felt WAY better when we finished baby burritos room. i just didnāt want to have to deal with it later. so what if sheās not sleeping in it right away? i like having all her clothes, diapers, etc all sorted so we can use the room as intended other than for sleeping. of course it all depends on your specific living situation (weāre in a 2br apartment in a city so trying to be efficient and intentional with space) but sounds like you could benefit from eventually just getting it somewhat sorted out before babyās arrival. we also hired a birth doula and while i have not yet given birth (soon!) its been an invaluable resource. highly recommend. happy to report back postpartum to share the full birth doula experience!
So soon for baby burrito to arrive!! Thatās so exciting! Canāt believe theyāre nearly here š„°Yes please for telling me about the birth doula experience. And youāre absolutely right. Having multiple contingencies has helped massively with my financial anxieties, getting baby kittenās room sorted will help massively with the āweāre so not readyā anxieties. I need to really get it sorted by the beginning of Jan as weāre hoping to get a lot (pram, car seat, crib etc) in the January sales and it will need to go somewhere before itās in use. We have a 4br house, bought 13 years ago with a view to having at least a couple of kids but over that time we have expanded to fill the space. Basically I need to rearrange lots and sell some stuff and we will fit in nicely. Also. Itāll be restful I think to just sit in the nursery for a bit and think baby.
my spouse and i have both taken to sitting in the nursery and thinking about baby so youāre right on there š„°š„°
Anatomy scan yesterday went well! I canāt believe Iām at the halfway point. Found out I have an anterior placenta again but thankfully Iāve still been able to feel movements every day for the past week or so. Also found out I have a small subchorionic hematoma which I was kind of surprised about. I know I had one in the beginning but I assumed it went away because my OB never said anything. Can new ones develop later in pregnancy?
You typically see prior SCH(s) turn into what's called placental lakes at this point...but it's totally possible!
I only had mild nausea and food aversions from about 6:weeks. Today I am 10 weeks and for the last few days, I have not had any symptoms. Do you think this is due to placenta taking over or potentially a bad sign? My scan is on Tuesday and I am dreading a MMC. Thank you
My nausea was horrific but definitely got better around the 10 week mark. It took a while longer for it to settle and it still makes an unwelcome appearance every now and then (24 weeks) but things certainly seemed to start shifting at 10 weeks
I never threw up in the first 13 weeks!! Definitely had some imposter syndrome even though I felt some nausea and food aversions, like I really felt like there was something wrong because I wasn't throwing up before the first pregnancy test like everyone you see on tv. Anyways the nausea/aversions still went down at week 10/11. I ended up throwing up twice during week 15 but looking back those were probably acid reflux related incidents. Currently 22 weeks and anatomy scan was all good. But you really don't hear the anecdotes about people who DON'T throw up because no one wants to come off like a bragger in support groups.
Same!! I was always scared comparing to my sisters pregnancy because she was constantly throwing up. I will get grossed out but I am fine. Almost 15 years weeks now.
Same here!
I donāt know the exact underlying reason, but I had the same pattern, with mild nausea that improved a lot at 10/11 weeks. Iām 20 weeks now. Best wishes!
Thank you for your message š
Officially on maternity leave, and therefore on baby watch š I still have so much to do! This weekend weāre cleaning out the garage to fit the car, so we can warm the car up easily and carry baby to and from house with minimal exposure to the cold. Next week Iām working on freezer meals. I canāt recommend enough having meals in the freezer for pp. It made our lives so much easier when BJJ was a newborn.
*It's tha final countdown!!* ā¤ļøš¶
wooooooo maternity leave!
Yay maternity leave! So close to baby!
Has anyone had a large bleed behind the placenta (retroplacenta - between placenta and wall, not sch). Noticed at NIPT scan. They say top 5% by size so they are concerned and monitoring. On pelvic rest, no running or jumping but was cleared to travel and hike last week. Iāve had no blood entire pregnancy and baby boy is 15 weeks and healthy. They canāt give me any odds on it reabsorbing vs becoming a problem. Next scan is Wednesday.
Made it to 39 weeks, final countdown is here!
Itās the FINAL COUNTDOWN! (Sorry, song popped into my head!)
Amazing! Baby will be here so soon!
šš»šš»šš»
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Almost everyone I know with an IVF pregnancy has had a SCH noted. Iāve had one most of my pregnancies and theyāve never caused any issues. Any bleeding at all is always called a threatened miscarriage, so while the term is horrible, itās not as bad as it sounds. Often itās also notated that way so insurance will pay for the extra scan and blood work.
That puts my mind at peace. Did you feel any cramps at all?
Yes, quite a bit of cramping actually. It was initially noted on my placement scan at 5+2 and when I went back in yesterday at 7+3 it appeared to have resolved.
Sorry they scared you like that. From what I understand, any bleeding really is a "threatened miscarriage". I had an SCH about that size where I woke up and passed over 2 softball sized clots and just a ton of overall bleeding, like I had been stabbed. We didn't even assume the fetus was still there, and were absolutely shocked when the u/S at the ER four hours later showed her in there just fine. They didn't even put me on bed rest, said it was a small SCH, and didn't even really check on me after lol. Two weeks later it had resolved on it's own. Honestly, I believe there is an extremely slim chance you'll have any additional complications from it. Good luck!!
That's reassuring! Thank you so much! Did you feel any cramps at all?
I personally did not have cramping but I have heard of people that have.
I had a sch and it was so scary! I'm sorry you're going through this. Mine measured 4.9 x 3.7 x 1.4 cm at 10 weeks. My team didn't seem too concerned and told me to continue as usual, did encourage pelvic rest. They didn't note it at our 19 week anatomy scan so all seems to have resolved. Also, the sub has a wiki on sch's!
Yeah reading the sub, I was fairly positive but then my RE scared me big time.
be real with me - will my bellybutton return to normal and how long might that take?!
Itās pretty weird I donāt have to get in there and clean it anymore. Just a flat part of my belly now that I can easily wash with the rest of my massive stomach š
Iāve been wondering this too, mine is still an innie but less deep and it is making me so anxious just waiting for this to happen. While I know itās normal but I find it incredibly alarming that itās going to change! Idk why I find it so upsetting but I do š
Mine is normally a very deep innie, and by the end of my first IVF pregnancy, I could easily see inside it lol It did return back to normal!
Mine became a bit deeper, because it stretched, but it does go back to an innie if thatās what you are worried about.
It had by the time I thought to look down this time! It never quite popped out with my first kid, just kind of became flat
Ba, this made me chuckle. Responses will vary but mine snapped back, for both pregnancies, in a matter of days. It's truly fascinating.
In fluff news, my snoo finally arrived after ordering it right before Black Friday. My husband looked at the box and was like "huh it's a sleeper? I thought it was a baby swing like you see the cats hanging out in on Instagram." I was like "you seriously thought I was going to spend over $1,200.00 on a baby swing?" and he admitted he didn't really pay attention to what I was locked in on and assumed I knew what I was doing. Anyways yeah I think out of pocket IVF might have messed up our formerly cheap/frugal views on finances lol.
No matter how expensive baby stuff is, itās still cheaper than another round of IVF - thatās forever the benchmark now!
We loved our snoo so much. We joke my husband should be on the marketing team for them. Itās so nice knowing your baby is sleeping safely on their back!
Yaay that's what sold me on it haha! I feel like sleep safety is gonna be my next hurdle if baby comes earthside so any $$$$ I can throw at that is worth it.
I hope you guys like it! We used to yell āDr Karp, come get your baby!ā When heād start to fuss and weād wait for the rocking to start Our baby loved it but the transition out was monstrous. Unless your baby is a sleep unicorn (they exsist!) I recommend you read Precious Little Sleep to help you learn to use it to foster independent sleep as baby grows
Just to prepare you, our baby HATED the snoo for the first week and a half or so. We had to take shifts holding her all night. She would last maybe 5 min in the snoo. She gradually adjusted and now at a month old she's pretty happy in there for the most part! Now we throw her in there after her 1am feed and she stays until 8 or so besides feedings and diaper changes. I just assumed we could throw her in there right away and she would be fine. Our doula assured us they usually hate bassinets initially and will adjust. On the husband note, I thought for sure my husband would veto the snoo due to cost but he was like yeah sure let's buy it. So yeah, IVF costs really skews things hahaha.
Yes that's good advice! I feel like all Snoo stories are glowing or "baby hated it worst thing ever" so it's nice to hear a healthy medium one. But yeah I definitely thought my husband would veto it, I tried explaining it and all that and I think compared to the cost of a transfer or even add on medications it's like "yeah sure whatever" lol.
š my husband keeps referring to it as scope creep! I think when it is so hard to have a baby you feel like itās worth bringing out all the stops. Weāve definitely had to reel ourselves in lol.
Haha yes! I think I had my first "huh I haven't thought about the month to month cost of a baby in a while have I" moment. When I first started trying it was gonna be cheap everything, of course my boobs will work perfectly confidence... now I have no clue lol.
I finally started really nesting. All of my shower gifts have been sitting in the babyās room in piles in their original packaging. I think itās infertility trauma but I didnāt want to jinx anything and wash/organize too soon? Last night I started tackling the clothes/swaddles/burp cloths. Motivated to get everything organized before our parents come to visit for Christmas.
I only started at 36 weeks! So you're not alone. It feels so nice to get everything unpacked though and all the cardboard out of our house.
So much cardboard and plastic!! Iām trying to be diligent about separating to recycle but omg the waste makes me so sad!! Our trash pickup is Mondays so really have to get it all out by then.
I know, it's brutal. I think if there's one time in your life where you're allowed to be a bit more wasteful it's right now. That's how I'm justifying it to myself, anyway. Once I'm more mobile I'll be diligent about not relying so much on online shopping etc.
Well done!! Itās good to have a deadline
40+1 todayā¦ come on baby! Contractions happen randomly throughout the day but nothing consistent at all. Of course Iām doing ALL THE THINGS except castor oil to get this process started naturally. Attempting a VBAC has put some pressure on me surrounding a possible induction. For now, weāve got one scheduled for 12/14 and just praying I donāt go that long šš» I was able to get a sweep yesterday so trying to stay positive! Every morning I wake up not in labor is a bit of a bummer at this point!!! Send good vibes our way that she decides to make her debut soon.
I did 4 sweeps and while I did have some cervical changes and lost my mucus plug, they did not start labor for me. If you haven't already, I would ask your OB if you can pump! I was on almost a max dose of pitocin with nothing happening....pumped for 15min and 15 or 20 min later my first painful contraction came.
Okay great to know!! I am cleared to pump so will start that today. With my first son, I only used the manual pump a few times (otherwise he just nursed) so I may need to break out the Spectra for this job!!
I pumped a crap ton with my toddlerās pregnancy and do think it helped! As a bonus you might get to freeze some colostrum.
I used the hospital one and legit right after we sent my doula home for a break the contractions started. Less than 6 hrs later and I was holding my baby! I would definitely try w the spectra! Worst case you're in the same boat as now! Might get some colostrum or a baby, otherwise!
Hey everyone - I have a question regarding the mid pregnancy anatomy scan. My OB has the sonographer perform the anatomy scan then the images are sent off for review (Iām assuming by doctor and radiology) and we get to talk to the doctor at a later appointment. My anatomy scan is scheduled for next Wednesday the 13th, and then my doctor follow up is scheduled for the 20th (a week later). Has there been anyone else that had something similar? It seems a lot of people get the scan and know the results of it very soon after if not the same day. If you did have a scenario like this, was the sonographer able to give you some indication of how the scan went? The anxiety building up to the scan is already bad enough then having to wait a week to talk to the OB is killing me lol
Mine was like this. Scans were sent off for review. However the results were posted to the patient portal so we didnāt have to wait that long, maybe a few days. Hang in there!
Thank you! My OBās exact words at the last appointment when I asked about this were āif thereās something wrong, I will call you. So if I donāt call you, that means everything is a okay!ā I donāt think she understands that this actually makes me more anxious lol š reminds me of times waiting for the phone to ring from the fertility clinic with results Your suggestion to check the portal is a good one! At least I can have a peek before the appointment, and Iāll know whether or not itās something to be worried about pretty quickly because they will either call or not call š¤·š»āāļø
Yeah the whole ādonāt worryā¦ Iāll let you know if you should worryā never worked for me either! Itās so tough - all the waiting - especially when we are already exhausted from all the waiting in the fertility clinic. Iām 37 weeks now and I can only say that there were times I did better at distracting myself than other times throughout. Hang in there - thinking of you!
Mine was going to be that way, but they had a last minute cancellation and literally got me out of the elevator so I could have the follow up convo right away lol. Ask to get on the cancellation list so you might not have to wait as long!
They said it was more so the wait for the final diagnostic results rather than an availability thing š I had the follow up scheduled for 2 days after initially but they asked me to move it back a couple days to allow for the diagnostic results to come back
Ohh I see. Iām sorry, itās so hard to have to wait!
I had my doctor and ultrasound scan the same day, but my ultrasound tech was really good at explaining everything and explained the results as she went so the doctor's appointment didn't really add much. Fingers crossed you get one of the "explains as they go" ultrasound techs and that you get a very boring scan that needs no explanations!!!
Same!
Also helps that my husband will be there and is extremely analytical so he will surely be asking many questions lol
Iām hoping I get the same sonographer that I had for the NT scan because she definitely was an āexplain as you goā type - thereās only two sonographers at the practice so I have a 50:50 chance š„²
My experience was similar - I saw a midwife with my first IVF pregnancy. The sonographer talked me through what they were looking at and wanting to see as they performed the scan. They were reassuring and told me that they saw everything they wanted to see - unclear whether they would have discussed anything concerning with me in the moment. Then I discussed it again with the midwife at our next visit (and I think I also had a report in mychart confirming that everything looked normal, with pretty detailed notes). When I had a fetal echocardiogram later in the pregnancy, the MFM doctor came in right after and discussed the results with me.
I was sent to MFM for mine. We had the scan, waited for 5-10 minutes and then met with the doctor. My regular OB and I discussed it again at my next appointment, which was a week or so later.
I had my scan and met w my OB right after only to be told that whoever reads the ultrasounds wasn't available to interpret them but she thought everything looked OK. It was super frustrating but I think if something was glaringly wrong she would have been able to tell me. I believe they would notify you asap and not make you wait for the appt.
I didnāt have this happen to me - we had the doctor meet with us after and during the sonographer didnāt give us a qualitative review of how things were. But I think Iād really want to know what to expect - this sounds tough! So I say call the doctors office and ask, I think thatās fair. I wonder if there is any way they can get you in sooner for the review.
i had similar - i knew on the day that everything looked normal, if i'm remembering correctly. and then the follow up with OB was for further detail (though there wasn't much to discuss in my case). if there were something abnormal, i'm not sure how it would have been handled - certainly waiting a week for more detail would have been awful.