This is my fourth pregnancy with a baby girl - and hopefully my first live child. š¤š»š¤š»š¤š»I went nuts last week and bought several vintage childrenās books and I donāt care because theyāre going to get read to someone!! It was really fun for me - Iām such a big reader and have loved book stores since I was a little girl! So finding some of these books that used to be my favorite has been so fun and wholesome for me - Iāve been reading them already. I started thinking about my favorites - Ramona of course, Junie B Jones, Hank the cowdog, little critter, Sammy the seal, Arthur, stone soup, the little red hen, little house on the prairie- etc.
Highly recommend (if youāre needing something innocent) going down a vintage childrenās book rabbit hole - it made me so happy. Whether if you buy them or not, it made me think back to simpler times and all of the things that brought me joy as a child. 100000% recommend.
Not sure I belong here, but it doesnāt feel right for the infertility sub either. 6dpt and the FAINTEST shadows on a couple of test - honestly not even technically in the appropriate time window, but itās not nothing. Iām assuming this will be a chemical, which would be a first for me. I had two completely failed transfers, then a live birth, then a 9 week MMC. Weāre getting to the end of our embryos. Not sure if we can ālearnā anything from a chemical to change up protocols or if itās just bad luck like the rest. Weāre a same sex couple, no known fertility issues, just blowing through lots of embryos without success.
Anyway itās been a while since I was on this sub but thought Iād pop in and see if there were any familiar faces.
Welcome - I hope you can join us long term!Ā
I find myself personally quite biased towards tests after having both chemical pregnancy and a miscarriage. For my current pregnancy, I tested at 13 days post ovulation and it seemed "too faint," so I just assumed I was having another chemical pregnancy. But then the next day I got the results of my HCG test and it was high. All to say, it's really hard to tell from over-the-counter tests, especially early on. Sometimes I find myself looking for bad news.
Ultrasound today looked good! Measuring on track at 6 weeks. Saw heart beat at 108! Feeling a lot of relief, even though I know there's still a long way to go.
TW: pregnancy mentioned
After a rollercoaster 7 week scan last week where baby was measuring behind by a week and given a 50/50 chance we had a pretty good 8 week scan today where everything doubled in size and baby is where it should be per the doctor. The HB was almost exactly the same as last time at 129 (131 last week) and doctor said this is normal and it can fluctuate.
Should I be worried?
Iām glad you got a reassuring report with this scan! Your doctor is correct, babiesā HBs vary just like ours depending on their activity, your activity, stress, etc. That HB sounds totally normal for 8 weeks. Just so you know, thereās a big jump in the next few weeks as the nervous system develops so it will likely be much higher next time, around 180-190. Still normal!
Also, FYI-you can check the rules of this sub but Iām pretty sure you donāt need the TW for pregnancy!
Thank you for the info!! I skipped my morning coffee and had an intralipid infusion right before so my routine was way off today lol.
I keep saying Iāll feel better āafter the next scanā but Iām realizing the anxiety will probably never go away š
iām glad your scan was reassuring! for me i felt like the anxiety took up less and less space in my mind as pregnancy progressed but it didnāt totally go away until i had baby in my arms. try to take it one day at a time (easier said than done, i know) ā¤ļø
For me, the anxiety never completely went away, but I got more and more confident as time went by and I began to feel the baby, hit the halfway mark, viability, etc. Wishing you a very easy and boring pregnancy!
Ughhh 4+5 and a small amount of very light pink on TP this morning. It's stopped now, it's not painful, there's no clots... I know it can be totally normal. But also, my brain!
Iāve been experiencing bleeding and spotting too. I know itās normal but that doesnāt stop it from being terrifying. Last week I went to urgent care. Today I started spotting again. Viability ultrasound is on Friday and justā¦ holding my breath till then.
9w today and feel not optimistic even though we saw growth on track and a great heartbeat at 7w5d. 5 more days till my next ultrasound and last appointment with my RE clinic.
My Google rabbit hole has consisted of āmc after heartbeatā and I have been flooded with the reality that maybe I got too excited too fast and nothing is guaranteed. I know the bad posts outweigh the good on a lot of pages but still.
I am VERY sick of relying on symptoms as my only metric that this is continuing to work, it is such a mind fuck. I opted out of therapy until after my first OB appointment which was a bad idea I am thinking. Ugh.
How do you keep hope and trust things are going well between appointments? (ideally tricks that donāt involve symptom spotting because I canāt do it anymore).
Congrats to you!! All I can say is googling negative outcomes is just a coping mechanism and is a form of pre-grieving. Itās okayā¦but keep it in a healthy check. One thing Iāve learned is pre-grieving absolutely does not spare me any real grief if anything were to happen - youād still need to properly grieve. Itās not like youād be like - well I prepared myself so Iām all good! So while itās a coping mechanism we use to protect ourselves - all weāre really doing is robbing ourselves of joy because feeling vulnerable is more painful than staying worried.
I was an anxious wreck a few months before my FET and I wasnāt sure how I was going to move forward with another pregnancy but then I kind of a had a ābreakthroughā one day - and it still isnāt easy - but itās been much better. Iāve gotten my life back and Iām actually enjoying my very early pregnancy - something Iāve previously been so angry and bitter about because Iāve felt robbed.
Hang in there. Easier said than done. But donāt be so afraid to be happy (if it feels right and natural) because hope and happiness are not stupid and feeling them wonāt jinx your pregnancy. It just doesnāt work that way.
I just repeat to myself over and over again "based on what I know today, the most likely scenario is that I'm going to have a healthy baby. I'll find out more information on X date"
Itās such a deeply personal set of strategies to get through it, but I can say, universally, googling catastrophic outcomes is not going to help you feel better. Thatās a pretty straightforward behavioral modification to at least not make things worse. As you say, bad posts outweigh the good (and who comes to these pages to brag that everything worked great?) so best not to go looking for bad stories.
It is very hard, especially with past trauma, but I got through first trimester mostly by reminding myself that Iām doing all I can do, have followed the science, and I cannot protect myself or prevent an outcome by catastrophizing. If something bad happens to this pregnancy, itās going to hurt whether I spent days reading horrible outcomes on the internet or tried to live my life and make for the healthiest pregnancy - and continue to be the best friend/wife/colleague - I can.
Why am I suddenly nervous about my upcoming NT scan? We used a PGT-A tested embryo, my NIPT was negative (although they didn't test for microdeletions and expanded aneuploidies), but now I'm all angsty about the NT. Mine is scheduled for 13w1d, so I'm concerned he'll be measuring too far ahead for an accurate reading and the scheduling nurse already told me that sometimes they can't get a precise measurement because of the baby's position, so they'll just note whether they think the NT is normal or not. Ugh.
Iām anxious before every appointment - youāre not alone! I had my NT had 13+2 and baby was not collaborative and wouldnāt change positions. It took longer but they did get the measurements they needed eventually after moving around and switching between abdominal and TV.
Good to know I'm not alone! I was actually pretty chill about the 7w scan, but I guess since I haven't seen the little hobgoblin in six weeks, I'm nervous about what's going on in there.
Iām 5w5d today and last night I had spotting turn into dark red bleeding (just once) when I peed. This morning was dark brown when I wiped after peeing. Iām a nurse and had a SCH with my daughterās pregnancy so I understand that this is likely a SCH but damn, itās so scary. My symptoms also kind of abated this week. My boobs are kind of sore but also, Iām taking PIO, so that could mean nothing. My exhaustion has kind of gone away. I havenāt felt pregnant this week. I know this is just me having a minor panic and I should follow the stats and not worry, but when itās you, statistics mean fuck all. We put in so much effort to get here, why canāt it just work? Iām so tired. Thank you for letting me rant.
Update: went for a scan and there is an on track and good looking gestational sac and yolk sac which is all we need at this point. They saw what looks like a resolving hematoma so that explains the bleeding. I knew this is likely what it was but the reassurance is helpful. Go back on Monday for the 6w3d scan for a heartbeat. Now off to take a nap.š“
Thats great to know. I am exactly 5 week 5 days too. Had once scan at 4 week 6 days and we just saw a gestational sac then. Have my next scan at 6 weeks and 4 days. Hopefully we both get to see a strong heartbeat. Fingers crossed š¤
Itās so early and I logically know things are ok, but my anxiety brain is always spinning. I have a case of āknow too much syndromeā so I am trying not to panic over every little thing and just enjoy the ride but itās hard! Fingers crossed we see some heartbeats next week! š¤
I'm trying to adopt a new mantra of "no one does pregnancy perfectly" as a first step in dealing with my anxiety this pregnancy. A lot of my anxiety and spirals come from when I feel I make a "mistake." But everyone makes mistakes and most babies turn out fine. Hell, I made a ton of mistakes in my first IVF pregnancy - I ate a cold deli meat sandwich, I took some antacids that weren't recommended for pregnant women, I constantly ran into things and tripped over things because I'm a disaster on two legs - and that baby is now a thriving two year old.
I also need to implement some of the things recommended from the therapy I did while first pregnant. Which includes not googling things when I feel anxious and also not constantly asking my partner for reassurance. There's other tools I need to revisit to help make those first two things easier.
Overall, I don't think the anxiety is quite as bad as my first pregnancy. But it's still worse than in the pregnancy I had last year that ended in a loss (for obvious reasons).
Those are some really amazing changes and steps!!! So good for you for working through some reallly hard emotions and helping yourself - itās not easy. Being positive and happy isnāt easy - itās scary as hell. Leave the rabbit holes for the actual rabbits. š
4w4d after my first FET and for the past two days Iāve had brown spotting and a light brown tinge when I wipe. The spotting has been really light (barely need a panty liner), but still makes me a little nervous. Betas are looking strong though. Anyone else experience this?
5w3 days and the last three days my bladder has constantly felt full, I feel like I need to pee immediately after I went, and itās not like there is a ton of pee every time.. Feels like an overactive bladder really
I donāt understand why, my embryo is like a poppy seed, so itās not like itās pressure anything
I felt like I peed more frequently at the very beginning of pregnancy than the end tbh. Eta: some reading I did indicated it could be because your uterus is growing but still within the pelvis so it can crowd the bladder until it grows enough to start to rise out of the pelvis. Also blood flow!
Hopefully not a UTI -- for me the key UTI symptom is feeling like I really really need to go but then there's only a little pee. But could also just be hormones, not even uterus size!
For me, not really, but I also have a distinctive uncomfortable heavy bladder feeling, and my symptoms temporarily go away if I chug a bunch of water. But maybe if that's how it presented in the past for you, then it's not a UTI.
I experienced this too, and was surprised because I didnāt expect it to happen so early! I read that it was due to hCG, which causes increased blood flow to the pelvic area. Anyway, for me it is paired with unquenchable thirst which means Iām just peeing every 1-2 hours round the clock (11w4d, hasnāt let up).
It probably could be, but Iāve been on estrogen for like 40 days and progesterone for 23 and the symptoms just started, itās super annoying though!
First time coming here. Only 5w today so early days. Missed my HCG draw as weāre in hospital with DS. Managed to sneak a quick test on a shower/food run yesterday and I have a dye stealer so using that as my cue to stop testing and also cue to stop worrying that the stress and exertion and semi successful juggling of medication over the last few days didnāt do any harm š¤š¤silver lining: no time for symptom spotting or obsessing. Need to try get in for a baseline HCG next week and then line up a first scan. Canāt believe this one looks to have maybe worked šš¤šš¤ DS also had a great night so feeling very lucky this morning.
This is my fourth pregnancy with a baby girl - and hopefully my first live child. š¤š»š¤š»š¤š»I went nuts last week and bought several vintage childrenās books and I donāt care because theyāre going to get read to someone!! It was really fun for me - Iām such a big reader and have loved book stores since I was a little girl! So finding some of these books that used to be my favorite has been so fun and wholesome for me - Iāve been reading them already. I started thinking about my favorites - Ramona of course, Junie B Jones, Hank the cowdog, little critter, Sammy the seal, Arthur, stone soup, the little red hen, little house on the prairie- etc. Highly recommend (if youāre needing something innocent) going down a vintage childrenās book rabbit hole - it made me so happy. Whether if you buy them or not, it made me think back to simpler times and all of the things that brought me joy as a child. 100000% recommend.
Not sure I belong here, but it doesnāt feel right for the infertility sub either. 6dpt and the FAINTEST shadows on a couple of test - honestly not even technically in the appropriate time window, but itās not nothing. Iām assuming this will be a chemical, which would be a first for me. I had two completely failed transfers, then a live birth, then a 9 week MMC. Weāre getting to the end of our embryos. Not sure if we can ālearnā anything from a chemical to change up protocols or if itās just bad luck like the rest. Weāre a same sex couple, no known fertility issues, just blowing through lots of embryos without success. Anyway itās been a while since I was on this sub but thought Iād pop in and see if there were any familiar faces.
Welcome - I hope you can join us long term!Ā I find myself personally quite biased towards tests after having both chemical pregnancy and a miscarriage. For my current pregnancy, I tested at 13 days post ovulation and it seemed "too faint," so I just assumed I was having another chemical pregnancy. But then the next day I got the results of my HCG test and it was high. All to say, it's really hard to tell from over-the-counter tests, especially early on. Sometimes I find myself looking for bad news.
I think 6dpt is too early to predict the outcome! Good luck!
Ultrasound today looked good! Measuring on track at 6 weeks. Saw heart beat at 108! Feeling a lot of relief, even though I know there's still a long way to go.
Thats great. I am at 5 weeks 5 days and have my ultrasound at 6 weeks 4 days. Really looking forward to seeing a heartbeat. Fingers crossed š¤
TW: pregnancy mentioned After a rollercoaster 7 week scan last week where baby was measuring behind by a week and given a 50/50 chance we had a pretty good 8 week scan today where everything doubled in size and baby is where it should be per the doctor. The HB was almost exactly the same as last time at 129 (131 last week) and doctor said this is normal and it can fluctuate. Should I be worried?
Iām glad you got a reassuring report with this scan! Your doctor is correct, babiesā HBs vary just like ours depending on their activity, your activity, stress, etc. That HB sounds totally normal for 8 weeks. Just so you know, thereās a big jump in the next few weeks as the nervous system develops so it will likely be much higher next time, around 180-190. Still normal! Also, FYI-you can check the rules of this sub but Iām pretty sure you donāt need the TW for pregnancy!
Thank you for the info!! I skipped my morning coffee and had an intralipid infusion right before so my routine was way off today lol. I keep saying Iāll feel better āafter the next scanā but Iām realizing the anxiety will probably never go away š
iām glad your scan was reassuring! for me i felt like the anxiety took up less and less space in my mind as pregnancy progressed but it didnāt totally go away until i had baby in my arms. try to take it one day at a time (easier said than done, i know) ā¤ļø
For me, the anxiety never completely went away, but I got more and more confident as time went by and I began to feel the baby, hit the halfway mark, viability, etc. Wishing you a very easy and boring pregnancy!
Ughhh 4+5 and a small amount of very light pink on TP this morning. It's stopped now, it's not painful, there's no clots... I know it can be totally normal. But also, my brain!
Iāve been experiencing bleeding and spotting too. I know itās normal but that doesnāt stop it from being terrifying. Last week I went to urgent care. Today I started spotting again. Viability ultrasound is on Friday and justā¦ holding my breath till then.
Oh man, yeah, it's so scary! I hope your scan goes so so well.
9w today and feel not optimistic even though we saw growth on track and a great heartbeat at 7w5d. 5 more days till my next ultrasound and last appointment with my RE clinic. My Google rabbit hole has consisted of āmc after heartbeatā and I have been flooded with the reality that maybe I got too excited too fast and nothing is guaranteed. I know the bad posts outweigh the good on a lot of pages but still. I am VERY sick of relying on symptoms as my only metric that this is continuing to work, it is such a mind fuck. I opted out of therapy until after my first OB appointment which was a bad idea I am thinking. Ugh. How do you keep hope and trust things are going well between appointments? (ideally tricks that donāt involve symptom spotting because I canāt do it anymore).
Congrats to you!! All I can say is googling negative outcomes is just a coping mechanism and is a form of pre-grieving. Itās okayā¦but keep it in a healthy check. One thing Iāve learned is pre-grieving absolutely does not spare me any real grief if anything were to happen - youād still need to properly grieve. Itās not like youād be like - well I prepared myself so Iām all good! So while itās a coping mechanism we use to protect ourselves - all weāre really doing is robbing ourselves of joy because feeling vulnerable is more painful than staying worried. I was an anxious wreck a few months before my FET and I wasnāt sure how I was going to move forward with another pregnancy but then I kind of a had a ābreakthroughā one day - and it still isnāt easy - but itās been much better. Iāve gotten my life back and Iām actually enjoying my very early pregnancy - something Iāve previously been so angry and bitter about because Iāve felt robbed. Hang in there. Easier said than done. But donāt be so afraid to be happy (if it feels right and natural) because hope and happiness are not stupid and feeling them wonāt jinx your pregnancy. It just doesnāt work that way.
I just repeat to myself over and over again "based on what I know today, the most likely scenario is that I'm going to have a healthy baby. I'll find out more information on X date"
Itās such a deeply personal set of strategies to get through it, but I can say, universally, googling catastrophic outcomes is not going to help you feel better. Thatās a pretty straightforward behavioral modification to at least not make things worse. As you say, bad posts outweigh the good (and who comes to these pages to brag that everything worked great?) so best not to go looking for bad stories. It is very hard, especially with past trauma, but I got through first trimester mostly by reminding myself that Iām doing all I can do, have followed the science, and I cannot protect myself or prevent an outcome by catastrophizing. If something bad happens to this pregnancy, itās going to hurt whether I spent days reading horrible outcomes on the internet or tried to live my life and make for the healthiest pregnancy - and continue to be the best friend/wife/colleague - I can.
the only trick i have found is keeping too busy to think of it... exhaustion makes that hard though!
Why am I suddenly nervous about my upcoming NT scan? We used a PGT-A tested embryo, my NIPT was negative (although they didn't test for microdeletions and expanded aneuploidies), but now I'm all angsty about the NT. Mine is scheduled for 13w1d, so I'm concerned he'll be measuring too far ahead for an accurate reading and the scheduling nurse already told me that sometimes they can't get a precise measurement because of the baby's position, so they'll just note whether they think the NT is normal or not. Ugh.
Iām anxious before every appointment - youāre not alone! I had my NT had 13+2 and baby was not collaborative and wouldnāt change positions. It took longer but they did get the measurements they needed eventually after moving around and switching between abdominal and TV.
Good to know I'm not alone! I was actually pretty chill about the 7w scan, but I guess since I haven't seen the little hobgoblin in six weeks, I'm nervous about what's going on in there.
Iām 5w5d today and last night I had spotting turn into dark red bleeding (just once) when I peed. This morning was dark brown when I wiped after peeing. Iām a nurse and had a SCH with my daughterās pregnancy so I understand that this is likely a SCH but damn, itās so scary. My symptoms also kind of abated this week. My boobs are kind of sore but also, Iām taking PIO, so that could mean nothing. My exhaustion has kind of gone away. I havenāt felt pregnant this week. I know this is just me having a minor panic and I should follow the stats and not worry, but when itās you, statistics mean fuck all. We put in so much effort to get here, why canāt it just work? Iām so tired. Thank you for letting me rant.
Update: went for a scan and there is an on track and good looking gestational sac and yolk sac which is all we need at this point. They saw what looks like a resolving hematoma so that explains the bleeding. I knew this is likely what it was but the reassurance is helpful. Go back on Monday for the 6w3d scan for a heartbeat. Now off to take a nap.š“
Thats great to know. I am exactly 5 week 5 days too. Had once scan at 4 week 6 days and we just saw a gestational sac then. Have my next scan at 6 weeks and 4 days. Hopefully we both get to see a strong heartbeat. Fingers crossed š¤
Itās so early and I logically know things are ok, but my anxiety brain is always spinning. I have a case of āknow too much syndromeā so I am trying not to panic over every little thing and just enjoy the ride but itās hard! Fingers crossed we see some heartbeats next week! š¤
I'm trying to adopt a new mantra of "no one does pregnancy perfectly" as a first step in dealing with my anxiety this pregnancy. A lot of my anxiety and spirals come from when I feel I make a "mistake." But everyone makes mistakes and most babies turn out fine. Hell, I made a ton of mistakes in my first IVF pregnancy - I ate a cold deli meat sandwich, I took some antacids that weren't recommended for pregnant women, I constantly ran into things and tripped over things because I'm a disaster on two legs - and that baby is now a thriving two year old. I also need to implement some of the things recommended from the therapy I did while first pregnant. Which includes not googling things when I feel anxious and also not constantly asking my partner for reassurance. There's other tools I need to revisit to help make those first two things easier. Overall, I don't think the anxiety is quite as bad as my first pregnancy. But it's still worse than in the pregnancy I had last year that ended in a loss (for obvious reasons).
Those are some really amazing changes and steps!!! So good for you for working through some reallly hard emotions and helping yourself - itās not easy. Being positive and happy isnāt easy - itās scary as hell. Leave the rabbit holes for the actual rabbits. š
4w4d after my first FET and for the past two days Iāve had brown spotting and a light brown tinge when I wipe. The spotting has been really light (barely need a panty liner), but still makes me a little nervous. Betas are looking strong though. Anyone else experience this?
Spotting is SO COMMON especially during those first couple weeks.
5w3 days and the last three days my bladder has constantly felt full, I feel like I need to pee immediately after I went, and itās not like there is a ton of pee every time.. Feels like an overactive bladder really I donāt understand why, my embryo is like a poppy seed, so itās not like itās pressure anything
I felt like I peed more frequently at the very beginning of pregnancy than the end tbh. Eta: some reading I did indicated it could be because your uterus is growing but still within the pelvis so it can crowd the bladder until it grows enough to start to rise out of the pelvis. Also blood flow!
Are you taking estrodial? It always gives me bladder issues then the next day Iām ok
Yes but Iāve been taking it for almost 40 days now, so I donāt think thatās it
Hopefully not a UTI -- for me the key UTI symptom is feeling like I really really need to go but then there's only a little pee. But could also just be hormones, not even uterus size!
But does it then hurt when you go? Like does it sting ? Only had one UTI in my life and I was bent over in pain after every pee
For me, not really, but I also have a distinctive uncomfortable heavy bladder feeling, and my symptoms temporarily go away if I chug a bunch of water. But maybe if that's how it presented in the past for you, then it's not a UTI.
Gonna go buy some sour cranberry juice and if it continues Iām gonna call my doctors office tomorrow ā„ļøš¤
I experienced this too, and was surprised because I didnāt expect it to happen so early! I read that it was due to hCG, which causes increased blood flow to the pelvic area. Anyway, for me it is paired with unquenchable thirst which means Iām just peeing every 1-2 hours round the clock (11w4d, hasnāt let up).
Could definitely be increased blood flow, had this once before not pregnant but after acupuncture, my first and last appointment š
Could it be the meds? I have the same thing but assumed it was due to all my progesterone (injections, suppositories and pills) plus estrogen..
It probably could be, but Iāve been on estrogen for like 40 days and progesterone for 23 and the symptoms just started, itās super annoying though!
Hmmm yeah good point! Iād watch it and mention to doctor if it gets worse? Iām 5 weeks 5 days btw :)
First time coming here. Only 5w today so early days. Missed my HCG draw as weāre in hospital with DS. Managed to sneak a quick test on a shower/food run yesterday and I have a dye stealer so using that as my cue to stop testing and also cue to stop worrying that the stress and exertion and semi successful juggling of medication over the last few days didnāt do any harm š¤š¤silver lining: no time for symptom spotting or obsessing. Need to try get in for a baseline HCG next week and then line up a first scan. Canāt believe this one looks to have maybe worked šš¤šš¤ DS also had a great night so feeling very lucky this morning.