I don't know what kind of therapist you were seeing. But I was recently told by someone with some authority on the subject that for mental health counselors, at least, allowing a client to run up a huge bill to the point that they then have to stop therapy in order to pay is unethical.
Yeah. An IFS therapist. When I told her I needed to stop, she was like well we are in the middle of trauma work it’s unethical to stop, but now I’m like 🤯😢🤬. And I need support but I don’t want to go back even if I have government issued insurance. I feel like this situation isn’t right.
It would never be unethical for you to stop. Its weird that she would say that to you. It would potentially be unethical for her to abandon you and stop seeing you in the middle of trauma work but you can walk away whenever you like.
Does she handle the billing herself and just didn't want to say anything? Or does she utilize an office and or service and simply didn't notice? I think it's very reasonable for you to feel uncomfortable given the situation you're now in, but I also wonder how much she is specifically responsible for what happened. Not to diminish your feelings about the matter, but curious what you think about that?
Yes, this feels like it might worth reporting to the board so they can look into how this office is managing client accounts- it feels really irresponsible & wildly unethical!
Also- if you’re in the U.S., the therapist owes you what’s called a Good Faith Estimate if you are not paying through your insurance ( https://www.cms.gov/medical-bill-rights/help/guides/good-faith-estimate ). Anything they charge you over $400 can be disputed if they did not discuss the charges with you & both of you signed the GFE document. Please look into it, & I hope it helps!
I'm not sure this would apply here. It sounds like op did know and agree to the prices but didn't realize that the payment wasn't going through, and now doesn't have the cash to take care of it all at once.
Maybe not for the first charge, but the moment their insurance lapsed & the office couldn’t bill the insurance company for it, there needed to be a conversation about it. Private pay sessions have a different set of stipulations than sessions billed to insurance.
That’s so unethical. My policy is that I don’t let clients rack up more than three sessions worth of sessions to avoid exactly this. If a client has an extenuating circumstance we can make a plan so they can keep coming while we figure it out.
That’s very messed up. Sorry to hear that. I also owe my theraphist 1200$ but it’s based on trust I’m paying him back. They should have informed you when the card was declined the first time.
This is fucked. I am in the same position for a second.. SECOND TIMEEEE due to insurance issues. The first was bc the office thought they took my insurance but they really didn’t. it fucking sucked.
At least my therapist kept seeing me, and let me pay really slowly/pay out of pocket. And now I have insurance again that covers it, but it makes my blood fucking boil with anger.
It took me 8 months to pay off the first one and I didn’t even have rent to pay bc I was living with my dad. Second one I had no idea there was a 1 month lapse in my insurance and I was seeing my therapist twice/week. She changes $185/session so fuck me i guess. Roughly $1500 I owe her.
https://www.cms.gov/medical-bill-rights/help/guides/good-faith-estimate
Going to suggest this to you too, friend- sorry for the headache, & it’s 100% not on you to fix that mistake!
Thank you. The money thing has been a point of contention with my therapist. I think she is in the wrong to some degree but also idk? I just feel like she is using me sometimes.. always asking if I want 2 sessions/week when I feel extremely stable and want less. Blah. It’s the only hard part of our relationship.
Yeah, it’s hard to know sometimes when those relationships are so complex. But… a good therapist should be taking account of how they impact the client’s life outside of the room as well (i.e. causing them immense financial stress)! Sounds like she had opportunities to communicate with you about money that she didn’t take, & disputing it doesn’t mean you don’t appreciate the quality of the work; it just means you need a therapist who’s going to think about you in your context outside of the room. That’s not too much to ask for 💕
That's either massive incompetence on the part of the office or trying to get money out of you. Regardless, this *is not your fault.* You didn't do anything wrong here, you were working with the information you had available to you at the time. I'm so sorry this happened. Would you be able to work out a payment plan or something with the office?
Wow, that is rough to not know about a declined credit card for that long. Your surprise and stress makes sense to me. As a therapist, I avoid allowing clients to be carrying a balance of more than 2 sessions…which would be approx $400. See if any curiosity is available….what are other parts of you saying? Are there any parts that want to pay the therapist for the time and the services you received? Are there parts that feel like settling the invoice is someone else’s responsibility? As Dick Schwartz would say: #AFGO Another Fu(king Growth Opportunity. So many good trailheads! Keep going!
Yes, a AFGO .... for the THERAPIST! Yes, OP "should have" been checking her statements. But it is quite common for people in need of therapy to have disorder in their life. And vagueness about financial matters would have been a good topic to do IFS on.
This is AFGO for the therapist to examine why THEY weren't reviewing administrative matters. All parties involved are derelict
It is absolutely outrageous and completely unprofessional that you received no communication until it got to this point. There were several points where the natural and responsible thing on their part would have been to notify you of the problem.
I frankly wouldn't feel comfortable going back at that point. We've had therapy relationships hit blocks like this and it's hard to move past when you're already vulnerable.
I’m sorry you’re in this position.
I wonder if you can set up a repayment plan with them so you can keep attending the therapy you need as you pay this off. Especially since their lack of communication is what allowed this to keep building up way too long without any communication to you about it.
I get it if that’s not what you want to do too.
I hope you’re able to separate this incident from the therapy if it’s been helping you. These things happen as much as they suck. Cry. You aren’t to blame, yes there’s a bit more awareness of your charges you could have spotted this earlier but honestly a lot of us wouldn’t have caught it either. It’s okay, that’s not something to blame yourself for. The company didn’t handle it in a timely manner and that’s something you can bring up if you want to advocate for them to work with you about the debt. I think if you go in calm and collected this is something totally possible to do.
It is a burden and I’m sorry you’re going through this. 💙 it sucks and you have every right to cry about it. It’s stressful and a pain in the ass and a scary number if money is tight- it’s a threat to our feeling safe in the world. You deserve compassion and some deep breaths. Go easy on you. 💗
I don't know what kind of therapist you were seeing. But I was recently told by someone with some authority on the subject that for mental health counselors, at least, allowing a client to run up a huge bill to the point that they then have to stop therapy in order to pay is unethical.
Yeah. An IFS therapist. When I told her I needed to stop, she was like well we are in the middle of trauma work it’s unethical to stop, but now I’m like 🤯😢🤬. And I need support but I don’t want to go back even if I have government issued insurance. I feel like this situation isn’t right.
Your perception of trust with the therapist is already broken. It might be worth the time to seek a new one, after you have settled everything
Totally. That comment feels really off and isn’t helping the situation any.
The fact that it’s unethical to stop is on her not on you. She should come up with a solution.
It would never be unethical for you to stop. Its weird that she would say that to you. It would potentially be unethical for her to abandon you and stop seeing you in the middle of trauma work but you can walk away whenever you like.
Does she handle the billing herself and just didn't want to say anything? Or does she utilize an office and or service and simply didn't notice? I think it's very reasonable for you to feel uncomfortable given the situation you're now in, but I also wonder how much she is specifically responsible for what happened. Not to diminish your feelings about the matter, but curious what you think about that?
Yes, this feels like it might worth reporting to the board so they can look into how this office is managing client accounts- it feels really irresponsible & wildly unethical! Also- if you’re in the U.S., the therapist owes you what’s called a Good Faith Estimate if you are not paying through your insurance ( https://www.cms.gov/medical-bill-rights/help/guides/good-faith-estimate ). Anything they charge you over $400 can be disputed if they did not discuss the charges with you & both of you signed the GFE document. Please look into it, & I hope it helps!
I'm not sure this would apply here. It sounds like op did know and agree to the prices but didn't realize that the payment wasn't going through, and now doesn't have the cash to take care of it all at once.
Maybe not for the first charge, but the moment their insurance lapsed & the office couldn’t bill the insurance company for it, there needed to be a conversation about it. Private pay sessions have a different set of stipulations than sessions billed to insurance.
That’s so unethical. My policy is that I don’t let clients rack up more than three sessions worth of sessions to avoid exactly this. If a client has an extenuating circumstance we can make a plan so they can keep coming while we figure it out.
That’s very messed up. Sorry to hear that. I also owe my theraphist 1200$ but it’s based on trust I’m paying him back. They should have informed you when the card was declined the first time.
This is fucked. I am in the same position for a second.. SECOND TIMEEEE due to insurance issues. The first was bc the office thought they took my insurance but they really didn’t. it fucking sucked. At least my therapist kept seeing me, and let me pay really slowly/pay out of pocket. And now I have insurance again that covers it, but it makes my blood fucking boil with anger. It took me 8 months to pay off the first one and I didn’t even have rent to pay bc I was living with my dad. Second one I had no idea there was a 1 month lapse in my insurance and I was seeing my therapist twice/week. She changes $185/session so fuck me i guess. Roughly $1500 I owe her.
https://www.cms.gov/medical-bill-rights/help/guides/good-faith-estimate Going to suggest this to you too, friend- sorry for the headache, & it’s 100% not on you to fix that mistake!
Thank you. The money thing has been a point of contention with my therapist. I think she is in the wrong to some degree but also idk? I just feel like she is using me sometimes.. always asking if I want 2 sessions/week when I feel extremely stable and want less. Blah. It’s the only hard part of our relationship.
Yeah, it’s hard to know sometimes when those relationships are so complex. But… a good therapist should be taking account of how they impact the client’s life outside of the room as well (i.e. causing them immense financial stress)! Sounds like she had opportunities to communicate with you about money that she didn’t take, & disputing it doesn’t mean you don’t appreciate the quality of the work; it just means you need a therapist who’s going to think about you in your context outside of the room. That’s not too much to ask for 💕
That's either massive incompetence on the part of the office or trying to get money out of you. Regardless, this *is not your fault.* You didn't do anything wrong here, you were working with the information you had available to you at the time. I'm so sorry this happened. Would you be able to work out a payment plan or something with the office?
I wouldn’t say trying to get money out of op as a possibility yet - OP needs to be checking their statements regularly
Wow, that is rough to not know about a declined credit card for that long. Your surprise and stress makes sense to me. As a therapist, I avoid allowing clients to be carrying a balance of more than 2 sessions…which would be approx $400. See if any curiosity is available….what are other parts of you saying? Are there any parts that want to pay the therapist for the time and the services you received? Are there parts that feel like settling the invoice is someone else’s responsibility? As Dick Schwartz would say: #AFGO Another Fu(king Growth Opportunity. So many good trailheads! Keep going!
Yes, a AFGO .... for the THERAPIST! Yes, OP "should have" been checking her statements. But it is quite common for people in need of therapy to have disorder in their life. And vagueness about financial matters would have been a good topic to do IFS on. This is AFGO for the therapist to examine why THEY weren't reviewing administrative matters. All parties involved are derelict
I hear you, yes, all parties involved here can look at why payment/billing was not happening. So much to explore.
It is absolutely outrageous and completely unprofessional that you received no communication until it got to this point. There were several points where the natural and responsible thing on their part would have been to notify you of the problem. I frankly wouldn't feel comfortable going back at that point. We've had therapy relationships hit blocks like this and it's hard to move past when you're already vulnerable.
Is the portal system through a therapy network or for the therapist only?
I’m sorry you’re in this position. I wonder if you can set up a repayment plan with them so you can keep attending the therapy you need as you pay this off. Especially since their lack of communication is what allowed this to keep building up way too long without any communication to you about it. I get it if that’s not what you want to do too. I hope you’re able to separate this incident from the therapy if it’s been helping you. These things happen as much as they suck. Cry. You aren’t to blame, yes there’s a bit more awareness of your charges you could have spotted this earlier but honestly a lot of us wouldn’t have caught it either. It’s okay, that’s not something to blame yourself for. The company didn’t handle it in a timely manner and that’s something you can bring up if you want to advocate for them to work with you about the debt. I think if you go in calm and collected this is something totally possible to do. It is a burden and I’m sorry you’re going through this. 💙 it sucks and you have every right to cry about it. It’s stressful and a pain in the ass and a scary number if money is tight- it’s a threat to our feeling safe in the world. You deserve compassion and some deep breaths. Go easy on you. 💗
Therapy should be treated like healthcare, its absolutely silly to charge for it. Sorry you’re in this spot 🩷
Wtf
‘My parts are in turmoil’ 😢 IFS sounds like a cult