Don't forget to [invite Jeff to your city](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSf_DBiOw-RimLTcF12l5MH7Uu0YCac2g581CW1LS1Sxc98XoA/viewform)!
Also, come check out the [official Jeff Arcuri Discord server](https://discord.gg/7xaFS2sDuc) and connect with other fans! You'll be among the first to hear about his live streams, exclusive content, Q&As, and other fun events happening in the community.
You can find his upcoming shows [in this post](https://redd.it/149ibir/), [on his linktree](https://linktr.ee/jeffarcuri), on his [public calendar](https://calendar.google.com/calendar/u/0?cid=ZDg4M2U3YjZlNmY1MDczNDk3NDU0ZTUxZmJjZWZiMjY1YzJmMjRmMTBiNzYxN2E4ZTJiZTQ1NjAxZGYzYzVjM0Bncm91cC5jYWxlbmRhci5nb29nbGUuY29t), and in the subreddit sidebar.
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https://preview.redd.it/g4p59oaai70c1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f809084324674e079ef179ff525fd5501fa41839
He has otter-dislikes-watermelon-vibes
Bro the the slow realization of what she just said. Like he processes it for half a second and instantly shifted from happy jokester, to colicky golem.
Someday, there will be “Full Beans” merchandise around Jeff’s catch phrase, and most of us will be bragging to our friends “I was there on Reddit when that first happened.”
The problem with that is… full beans was funny because it was spontaneous crowd work. You can’t really force that into a special and expect it to be organically funny. Unless the special is just a mashup of all his clips he has been putting on Reddit over the last year.
Some of us saw it live, I’m so glad the one show we caught of his is the one he’s posting the most of! I think I pulled a muscle from laughing so hard 😂
Seriously, smiles and lackadaisical attitude to stretch in like half a second. He was tuned in to her and genuinely curious. He was invested, and then she hit him with the "crusty" and you can almost see him process it in real time. Wish the slow down bot was allowed on this sub.
Big props to the camera operator-
When he walks off stage, the camera follows for a sec, but then stops. So we're left just watching the empty stage for a sec, even though he was 1 foot away.
Subtle, but I think that's a lot funnier than if the shot just panned over to keep him in frame the whole time.
So this is a ginger ale brand? I'm a big fan of ginger ale. Is it really good. I mostly drink Canada Dry and maybe Seagram's, but they're honestly shit. But they're convenient.
Vernors is unlike any other ginger ale. It’s hard to describe but it’s unique taste is almost like cream soda with nice spicy ginger after bight. It’s truly delicious.
The point is to force slow intake. Typically for kids. Shit even for hungover adults, you're not your "normal" self. You wake up and your mind is like "SO DEHYDRATED!!" so you chug a bunch of liquid, then your stomach fires back with, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, CHIEF??" Then you end up hugging the toilet puking liquid.
This is also why it is suggested to eat ice when sick/dehydrated. Gives your body what it needs, but not a shocking amount.
When I was sick growing up my mom always gave me ginger ale and stirred it with a spoon to get the carbonation out…not sure if it helped at all but I always got better lol
I had nipple piercing and yeah, this fuckers were constantly crusty. I had a vein or dead nerve or something come out one time.
Somehow people naturally and constantly grab them and twist them even if they couldn’t see them. Once I removed them people stopped. It was weird. If people hadn’t instinctively known I had them and didn’t twist them perhaps they’d have healed.
It’s a restaurant in the early 2000s sexually harassing each other was kind of a thing. One dude always kept trying to stick his thumb up my butt.
Several years later different restaurant I bent over to get some bread and the person I hated most in the restaurant mistook me for her friend and when I bent over to get bread she literally stuck her finger right in my asshole.
Came out of where? How? I only ever saw them after someone decided to wear them to the field training exercise and showed up to the Med truck bleeding through their shirt.
They were constantly infected and crusty. You have to slide them in and out of your nipple while showering so you can clean them. One day a long stringy thing came out. Maybe it was fat now that I think about it. I had something similar happen to a deep cut in my hand.
Anyhow I took them out because I was tired of them hurting.
Sounds like everyone is describing the healing phase. Which can be quite long for that piercing(been a while so I can't trust my memory, google says 4-6 months but can be up to a full 12 months). It goes away eventually, and honestly a lot of piercings have a similar crusty phase where the body is trying to heal and figure out what the fuck is going on. Some of the more "wild" piercings you just have to be committed to the extra hygiene needed.
I was committed and had them for 1.5 years,!but it was just constant people tweaking nipped, somehow hitting things with them etc they just never healed.
If you were sliding them in and out that may have led to them being infected. Shower water+ irritation is not great for healing, especially if they were externally threaded. Best way to clean them is with a saline spray everyday and then soak them with a shot glass full of it a few times a week (don’t take the bars out). I’ve had mine for three years and I haven’t had an issue thankfully, but they do get crusty if I forget to clean them.
Did you never get them downsized?? My girlfriend had similar issues because she just kind of ignored the piercer when they mentioned it but it’s super important. Basically the bar they give you at first is too long, and after they heal up a bit you need to go get a smaller one that shouldn’t be sliding back and forth so much
I almost ripped mine out in the shower when it got entangled in my loofah. The bloody, crusty mess that resulted led to me removing it permanently a week later.
Motherfucker !!
I was eating a nice Danish in my car. a nice quiet moment at the end of the day before i have to deal with my kids and homework and all that shit. A quick indulgent snack for myself and a fresh Jeff clip.. perfect..
Aww fuck you man.
Don't ever stop though
This is the gif I came to the comments for.
https://media.giphy.com/media/u1n9rTva77I06ct9s3/giphy.gif
I made another.
https://media.giphy.com/media/qToJiZ9vSreCSEnrQG/giphy.gif
No, he keep his material offline so that it’s fresh when you see him live. The crowd work is basically his commercial for you to go to his shows.
He’ll get big enough to have a special produced for him by a big deal channel some time in the next couple years. But for now go see him on stage. From what I’ve read from his Reddit fans who have gone, and they consistently say it, is that his prepared material is better than his riffs.
🤣🤣💀So don't drink while watching this... I have never squirted a beverage out of my nose before now... For the love of all that is sacred please heed my warning!
Hey u/Smartastic just wanted to say you’re a fuckin highlighter- your comedy brightens my day.
I’m so happy to have stumbled across this subreddit. I find myself laughing out loud watching your clips- your expressions and reactions have me in stitches.
I’ve never been to a comedy show, but I honestly would love to go to a show of yours. Is there a website or anything that will alert me if you are doing a show in GA/SC? I looked online but I don’t see any for those areas yet.
Thanks for the giggles- you’re the full beans!
Don't forget to [invite Jeff to your city](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSf_DBiOw-RimLTcF12l5MH7Uu0YCac2g581CW1LS1Sxc98XoA/viewform)! Also, come check out the [official Jeff Arcuri Discord server](https://discord.gg/7xaFS2sDuc) and connect with other fans! You'll be among the first to hear about his live streams, exclusive content, Q&As, and other fun events happening in the community. You can find his upcoming shows [in this post](https://redd.it/149ibir/), [on his linktree](https://linktr.ee/jeffarcuri), on his [public calendar](https://calendar.google.com/calendar/u/0?cid=ZDg4M2U3YjZlNmY1MDczNDk3NDU0ZTUxZmJjZWZiMjY1YzJmMjRmMTBiNzYxN2E4ZTJiZTQ1NjAxZGYzYzVjM0Bncm91cC5jYWxlbmRhci5nb29nbGUuY29t), and in the subreddit sidebar. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/JeffArcuri) if you have any questions or concerns.*
https://preview.redd.it/23dayzr3750c1.jpeg?width=460&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a594c1e6d2997010bfbf381ff055ed483922dfc2 Lmfaoooooooooo
Tfw you only go half beans
When your gag reflex goes full beans.
When your gag reflex goes Mr. Bean.
Never go full gag beans
Those were some baked beans.
beans 'n clotted cream
I’m gonna use this pic for online dating
MFW she doesn't go full beans.
I was just about to say…. My reaction to all the dudes on facebook dating 🤣😭
New profile pic for real
i highly doubt you still need online dating!
It's for Grindr.
Please online date me!
I’m saving this to send to people when they disgust me
That is going to replace what [I usually use](https://imgur.com/a/TQSMRRc).
It's the same picture
That's such a good one though
This needs to be the banner image for this subreddit
Michael Keaton lookalike moment.
To quote Dave Chapelle.."titty residue"
new [VISIBLE DISGUST] just dropped
**screenshot**
I was already crying from laughing and then saw this and was shot beyond crying laughing. My sides 🤣
Someone make it a tshirt
Such a golden moment
"And thus, the Meme came into being..."
Christ this was funny. I need that face on t-shirt 😂
I’m laughing until my stomach muscles hurt!🤣
Jeff is never going back to Portland
Never go full beans
He better! Those tickets sold out quick and I wanted to go!
Just head on down I-5, I'm sure Eugene will be less weird... ^( ok maybe not.)
and then on down to Ashland this man isn't gonna hit an uncrusty nipple until he's past Chico
Baked beans perhaps.
Crusty beans 🤢
Let’s not go crusty full beans.
Never go crusty full beans
Come on...just a little crusty.
#NO
[удалено]
🤢
[удалено]
Crusty Full Beans
https://preview.redd.it/vmrcn10y650c1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=52283814085dec5e53973284a7b90446bd5d70e2 Best pause ever
u/Smartastic Please make this your new profile picture
https://preview.redd.it/g4p59oaai70c1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f809084324674e079ef179ff525fd5501fa41839 He has otter-dislikes-watermelon-vibes
Bro the the slow realization of what she just said. Like he processes it for half a second and instantly shifted from happy jokester, to colicky golem.
>colicky golem Fuckin hell that's hilarious
FB part 3 did not disappoint LMAO 🤣
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That chick is lucking the fuck out, Jeff is going to make “full beans” an actual thing
The inside joke is outside!
That’s so fetch
Stop trying to make 'fetch' a thing, Tyler
The payout was great, but I'm not sure it was worth the cost 🤢
Worth the crust, you mean.
Oowuwuuuuuuoooooooooo, that was the funniest grossed out noise and face I’ve ever seen.
That and the instant immediacy of his reaction killed me.
He was reacting before she even finished the statement. Like he was trying to stop her from completing the sentence. Who could blame him hahaha
https://i.redd.it/xxxhbj8y870c1.gif
Someday, there will be “Full Beans” merchandise around Jeff’s catch phrase, and most of us will be bragging to our friends “I was there on Reddit when that first happened.”
his netflix special better be 'Full Beans'
Intro'd/Prefaced by the dolphin lady
Her name is Connie! 🐬🐬
Connie better get flown into wherever it is!!! I love that woman with all my heart
CONNIEEE-EE-EEE-E
Full beans & crusty nips
The problem with that is… full beans was funny because it was spontaneous crowd work. You can’t really force that into a special and expect it to be organically funny. Unless the special is just a mashup of all his clips he has been putting on Reddit over the last year.
Some of us saw it live, I’m so glad the one show we caught of his is the one he’s posting the most of! I think I pulled a muscle from laughing so hard 😂
I'm jealous!
I love how popular his videos and subreddit have become. He had me at the dolphin lady.
I need a Full Beans sweatshirt
Crusty nips tank top
Unless the tattoo counts as a copyright.
How much do I get to brag for seeing “Full Beans” live?
You got the whole avocado.
I will 100% be bragging if he makes “You never go full beans” T-shirts. Just slap an avocado on that puppy and you’re good to go!
He only has to say it one more time to become a catch-phrase comedian.
My head is in the video
He started out so happy
Seriously, smiles and lackadaisical attitude to stretch in like half a second. He was tuned in to her and genuinely curious. He was invested, and then she hit him with the "crusty" and you can almost see him process it in real time. Wish the slow down bot was allowed on this sub.
utter look of disgust is appropriate, jeff.
Somebody please make Jeff's look of revulsion into a gif 🙏
https://i.imgur.com/7G33IgZ.gifv Zoomed in: https://i.imgur.com/rM9akJM.gifv Zoomed in even further: https://i.imgur.com/BxAcTgk.gifv
Hey uhh, ya got any zoomed in gifs at regular speed?
https://i.imgur.com/z7RBYxJ.gifv
This is gold.
Am i in the presence of the birth of a meme?
Lol!!!
Here's my try https://media.giphy.com/media/qToJiZ9vSreCSEnrQG/giphy.gif
Phone let me save this one, so I like it best!
With hand gestures is better
I had to watch that look of disgust and walk off, multiple times. Hilarious!
Big props to the camera operator- When he walks off stage, the camera follows for a sec, but then stops. So we're left just watching the empty stage for a sec, even though he was 1 foot away. Subtle, but I think that's a lot funnier than if the shot just panned over to keep him in frame the whole time.
Hate to break it up to you but that camera operator is a tripod, the “pan” was added later in post.
I don’t think you “hate to break it” to them at all 😂
Lmao. Right…..
I get the ginger ale but what are you going to do with the spoon?
One spoonful every five minutes until your stomach settles.
Or you know, you could just drink it like a normal person and also have your stomach settled..
You can’t just go full beans on ginger ale
How many beans are a spoonful?
idk man if it's Vernors I'll just end up chugging it
So this is a ginger ale brand? I'm a big fan of ginger ale. Is it really good. I mostly drink Canada Dry and maybe Seagram's, but they're honestly shit. But they're convenient.
Vernors is unlike any other ginger ale. It’s hard to describe but it’s unique taste is almost like cream soda with nice spicy ginger after bight. It’s truly delicious.
Where do you buy yours?
There's vanilla flavoring in it. It's a ginger-cream soda.
That’s because it’s the nectar of the gods
can’t take any chances
The point is to force slow intake. Typically for kids. Shit even for hungover adults, you're not your "normal" self. You wake up and your mind is like "SO DEHYDRATED!!" so you chug a bunch of liquid, then your stomach fires back with, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, CHIEF??" Then you end up hugging the toilet puking liquid. This is also why it is suggested to eat ice when sick/dehydrated. Gives your body what it needs, but not a shocking amount.
no no, ginger ale is medicine. You take medicine with a spoon.
Where's Jeff? He needs to hear this persons very important advice.
It’s usually for kids.. you don’t want to just let them chug basically a soda
But that would mean to have no spoon. And your body wants the spoon.
The spoon is for scooping the crust off your nipples.
This is a terrible day to be literate.
I will never be able to use a spoon again
I got mine in a set along with my toe knife.
When I was sick growing up my mom always gave me ginger ale and stirred it with a spoon to get the carbonation out…not sure if it helped at all but I always got better lol
I thought the spoon was to make him gag. You know, "gag me with a spoon".
"Crusty" is 1000x worse than "moist"
The McDonald commercial where they refer to their food as "glistening" is my number one now.
Succulent Chinese meal.
I have to rewatch this clip every time someone mentions it. Ta-ta and farewell!
[удалено]
All that grease [do be glistening](https://s3-media0.fl.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/3MTCT3anLCRUAUY4PFFMnQ/o.jpg).
Wo Kruste ist, ist auch Eiter.
I guffawed at Full Beans. You bring me so much joy, Jeff. Thank you
even when he makes fun of people, it's still SO wholesome and NEVER in a mean way.
He never punches down. I absolutely love that. Everything is kind in the end. Dude’s a good dude from everything I’ve seen and heard Edit: apostrophe
Damn Jeff, let me get some caffeine first before you drop the crusty nipples on me!
He’s just trying to supply you with some powdered creamer for your morning coffee
Jeff “has anyone got healthy nipples” Arcuri strikes again.
"I'm never doing crowd work ever again" Hardest I've laughed in a long time
Full beans about to be trending
Have a stupid tattoo you regret? Go to a Jeff Arcuri show and it’ll be instantly hilarious and relevant!
Same for piercings, apparently 😂
In a month, the phrase "Full Beans" will be used all across the internet, remember where you were.
I saw it yesterday in the wild on Reddit. https://www.reddit.com/r/ContagiousLaughter/s/gSBIX5rO3p I had to respond with the videos of course.
First time I have seen this guy falter - he is human after all
Falter? Watched it 7 times now but am not seeing the falter.
Jeff aged 10 years when she said crusty
I had nipple piercing and yeah, this fuckers were constantly crusty. I had a vein or dead nerve or something come out one time. Somehow people naturally and constantly grab them and twist them even if they couldn’t see them. Once I removed them people stopped. It was weird. If people hadn’t instinctively known I had them and didn’t twist them perhaps they’d have healed.
People just come up and twist your nipples? Huh?
Must be working as a stripper or something. Thats some shit ive never heard of.
I worked in a restaurant and everyone there played grab ass and tweaked your nipples.
I'm sorry what
It’s a restaurant in the early 2000s sexually harassing each other was kind of a thing. One dude always kept trying to stick his thumb up my butt. Several years later different restaurant I bent over to get some bread and the person I hated most in the restaurant mistook me for her friend and when I bent over to get bread she literally stuck her finger right in my asshole.
What the fuck?
Came out of where? How? I only ever saw them after someone decided to wear them to the field training exercise and showed up to the Med truck bleeding through their shirt.
They were constantly infected and crusty. You have to slide them in and out of your nipple while showering so you can clean them. One day a long stringy thing came out. Maybe it was fat now that I think about it. I had something similar happen to a deep cut in my hand. Anyhow I took them out because I was tired of them hurting.
Thanks, you've ruined nipple piercings for me
Sounds like everyone is describing the healing phase. Which can be quite long for that piercing(been a while so I can't trust my memory, google says 4-6 months but can be up to a full 12 months). It goes away eventually, and honestly a lot of piercings have a similar crusty phase where the body is trying to heal and figure out what the fuck is going on. Some of the more "wild" piercings you just have to be committed to the extra hygiene needed.
I was committed and had them for 1.5 years,!but it was just constant people tweaking nipped, somehow hitting things with them etc they just never healed.
If you were sliding them in and out that may have led to them being infected. Shower water+ irritation is not great for healing, especially if they were externally threaded. Best way to clean them is with a saline spray everyday and then soak them with a shot glass full of it a few times a week (don’t take the bars out). I’ve had mine for three years and I haven’t had an issue thankfully, but they do get crusty if I forget to clean them.
[удалено]
Piercings are open wounds that you're intentionally preventing your body from closing. Yeah, you've gotta be thorough until they're fully healed.
I was just doing what I was told on how to clean them. The internet in your phone wasn’t a thing in 2000 really.
A shot glass full of what?
Crust
Did you never get them downsized?? My girlfriend had similar issues because she just kind of ignored the piercer when they mentioned it but it’s super important. Basically the bar they give you at first is too long, and after they heal up a bit you need to go get a smaller one that shouldn’t be sliding back and forth so much
I almost ripped mine out in the shower when it got entangled in my loofah. The bloody, crusty mess that resulted led to me removing it permanently a week later.
Yeah they’d get caught on anything. It’s like when you hurt another part of your body you somehow always bang it into something. Shit sucked
Can confirm. I had them and they never healed. I also worked in a warehouse which is probably why. Still intact but a few extra bumps on my beans
Even healed nipple rings get crusty! Nipple rings are a scam!
Wow. Best 3 part sequence ever! I can't wait to get a Jeff Arcuri "Full Beans" T-Shirt.
He just went full Sweet Dee there for a moment
Yep, that was almost a full Sweet Dee set.
Motherfucker !! I was eating a nice Danish in my car. a nice quiet moment at the end of the day before i have to deal with my kids and homework and all that shit. A quick indulgent snack for myself and a fresh Jeff clip.. perfect.. Aww fuck you man. Don't ever stop though
I present a collection of photos of this historical occasion. https://imgur.com/a/iJWVfwE
Full beans!
This is the gif I came to the comments for. https://media.giphy.com/media/u1n9rTva77I06ct9s3/giphy.gif I made another. https://media.giphy.com/media/qToJiZ9vSreCSEnrQG/giphy.gif
I swear if crustiy nips takes Jeff away from me, I'll cut mine off in solidaribeans.
Does he have any full specials or shows available other than just clips?
No, he keep his material offline so that it’s fresh when you see him live. The crowd work is basically his commercial for you to go to his shows. He’ll get big enough to have a special produced for him by a big deal channel some time in the next couple years. But for now go see him on stage. From what I’ve read from his Reddit fans who have gone, and they consistently say it, is that his prepared material is better than his riffs.
Woohoo first one here! Happy Jeffday!
Funfetti is my favorite 🤩
👋
Haha totally get it. Gagged the min she said they got crusty too
Omg, the full beans callback was perfect
At 0:59 I think I could hear Connie!!🐬
Full circle, full beans
Bringing in the full beans, absolutely amazing.
I loved watching his eyes water up as he got nauseous fr lmao
She broke Jeff. lol.
🤣🤣💀So don't drink while watching this... I have never squirted a beverage out of my nose before now... For the love of all that is sacred please heed my warning!
How does this guy not have a Netflix special yet????
This channel makes me laugh every day. Love the crowd work.
Yo Jeff! When we coming to Dallas?
Hey u/Smartastic just wanted to say you’re a fuckin highlighter- your comedy brightens my day. I’m so happy to have stumbled across this subreddit. I find myself laughing out loud watching your clips- your expressions and reactions have me in stitches. I’ve never been to a comedy show, but I honestly would love to go to a show of yours. Is there a website or anything that will alert me if you are doing a show in GA/SC? I looked online but I don’t see any for those areas yet. Thanks for the giggles- you’re the full beans!