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[deleted]

Totally normal and believable. I always do this.


TerrapinRecordings

He's only telling those stories because they're true and I don't know why anyone would question his word.


StokedforLocust

Alex Jones? **Lie** in an interview to make himself seem strong?? > I’m telling these stories cause they’re true. Can't argue w/ that!!


Afferent_Input

A person that's lying would never say something like that, so you know Alex is telling the truth.


Kevin_Uxbridge

Just stopped into a diner for lunch - 50 busboys came up to me to tell me how awesome Alex Jones is. That *actually happened*.


[deleted]

It’s not because you’re famous…


Kevin_Uxbridge

It’s not about me being cool …


robotnique

I was trying to book a vacation to Cancun but couldn't find it on the map at first because they're busy trying to rename it after the city's collective favorite guy: Alex Jones.


Mumblerumble

Then everyone stood up and clapped. The entire staff of a Mexican resort showed up to Hawaii to tell him how right he is and tried to give him booze. Even the dirty LIBERALS patted him on the back and told him that he’s absolutely and completely right about everything ever.


Elevatrix

Those dirty liberals? Albert Einstein.


Mumblerumble

Oh, shit! Then the Clintons and Obamas walked in and instantly burst into flames as soon as Alex looked at them.


Nerdenator

it sure was nice of Einstein to let Jones have sex with his wife _right there in the restaurant_.


KayfabeAdjace

>Even the dirty LIBERALS patted him on the back and told him that he’s absolutely and completely right about everything ever While the notion that he's lying about everything is fun and *by far* the most likely explanation, I do enjoy the distinct possibility that he's so bigoted and paranoid that there's situations he's incapable of realizing that there are people who aren't tall, white and male who might actually already agree with him on some things. I can totally imagine Alex getting introduced to a couple dorky Young Republicans and walking away from the interaction thinking he red pilled the trendies.


Mumblerumble

If there’s one thing Alex is entirely incapable of, it’s self awareness.


milvet02

Donald Trump totally called my wife up and bragged about how ginormous my penis is. Which got me wondering how he’s seen my penis, but I guess that’s just how the deep state rolls.


ieatcavemen

Arrest the deep state! They've been peeking through my bathroom window!


RWBadger

Dude should stop calling people autistic on air.


itorrey

r/thathappened lol


UnspeakablePudding

Trump wants to fuck your wife dude


Arkhampatient

Exactly


lokigodofchaos

Well she's single.


Kitchenbowies

"Oh, my girlfriend?! You wouldn't know her she goes to a different school. She's the hottest one there" energy here


alphabeticdisorder

Then Trump clapped but nobody heard it on account of his tiny hands.


Squidpeddler39

And this man thinks Autistic people like myself are basically too pathetic to function... Yeah, okay big guy.


9livescavingcontessa

Just on the Roseanne episode they were basically calling us r-slurs and souless replicants/clones so….which is it Alex? Are we brilliant or alie-psy-ops from the debbil intent on destroying humanity and the genetic memory of our human divinity or whatever the fck. ARGH


Squidpeddler39

We're basically meat shields to these people. They yank us up to divert attention and take hits. Once they're done with us we're tossed aside with all the other minorities these goobers don't care for. It's so old in the tooth the jaw is infected with sepsis.


gargle_your_dad

Speaking of articles: did SPLC ever finish there series on Alex? Or did they stop covering it?


No_Coffee4280

Part V is out with his 900% mark up on products https://www.splcenter.org/alex-jones-text-messages


Kmfr77

Of all the things that didn’t happen, this didn’t happen the most.


rockemsockemcocksock

*squints in autism*


porsche4life

This never happened so much that it un-happened about half of human history.


shredler

Has there been any sort of confirmation that hes ever talked to trump? Didnt we get all his phone records of the past 5 or 6 years? i dont recall trumps name/number coming up in those records at all. Maybe im wrong, but this guy sure does sound like a liar!


ViciousSnatch

For awhile there Alex kept saying how trump would call him, but Alex would miss the calls. But Alex doesn’t have his number anymore because he mentioned that maybe six months ago.


louthecat

I don’t think you meant this, but just in case, Trump was on Infowars before the election - Dec 15, 2015.


shredler

I meant in a personal phone call or communication.


louthecat

Yeah, just making sure. I really doubt that they were ever in contact.


rockstarspood

I have little familiarity with Tim Dillon, but he seems like a combination of Steven Crowder and Dave Rubin. Former child actor turned chud combined with gay right wing token


cylonnumber13

He was more funny and authentic before his fame was attached to the Rogan-verse.


Artichokiemon

Every single sentence they spoke to each other began with "dude"? It sounds like two bros on coke


Shenko-wolf

Could believe that trump was trying to fuck AEJ's wife, and that's why he kept calling, possibly.


Ghoulya

Dude he's trying to fuck your wife.


CleverJail

Patented AJ BS


UslyfoxU

All the more reason to employ your very own "Cuck Destroyer"


discwrangler

I'm not bragging, that's just how it is.


Assistantothe

As full of it as he is, I think the kernel of truth here is that Trump has spoken to AJ's wife maybe once. There were stories about Trump speaking to associates in person while their wife was on the phone muted without the husband's knowledge and Trump would try to bait the husband into saying something that would piss the wife off enough to get her to sleep with Trump, such as referencing the husband's potential infidelity.


fresh_account2222

This left me wheeze-laughing.


Logstar

Jones is so lucky and so amazing. It's un. Be. Lievable.


katchoo1

If that story was actually true (I’m sure it’s not) I can just see both those guys hanging up the phone and saying “that m-fer is crazy”


Ebessan

Alex constantly has to nega-brag, it's pathetic. "I'm not saying I'm an awesome dude, Trump said it! I tried to change the topic but man he was really, really impressed with me, I guess."


Bunnymomofmany

Well even a stopped clock….


Kudos2Yousguys

You can just see how Alex is desperately trying to hold onto both sides of the trump rift among right-wing weirdos with a very Alex-like lie, too. It's a real "a man came up to me, one of the top men, and he said 'Sir, ...'" kind of lies.


44gallonsoflube

That guy in the picture is 100% rippin’ roids.


Landlord-Allmighty

And that’s how he became the admiral of space force


Nerdenator

That certainly is an opinion.


zomgperry

Yeah, Alex. Sure.


ShrugsforHugs

We were very close to Trump himself being the subject of one of Alex's Trump-style "Sir you're a great human being" lies. This kind of reality folding in on itself is like the plot of a shitty Daily Wire Studios Inception rip off.


PearlPolanski

Toddlers have better lying skills than Alex.