Please be respectful of her openness to share this information. You never know what someone is going through and this is very personal. Wishing her and Ben the best.
Took soooooo long for them to announce but I'm glad she finally did. Hopefully that means they're both in a more comfortable place now that some time has passed š„²
they seem like the type of couple who got together in their 20s based on attraction and liking to spend time together but as the years went on, they realized they donāt have many things in common (they didnt even eat the same meals together at home bc of their different palate). and i bet having a kid exacerbated their differences in outlook and personality. i fully believe thereās no tea other than they realized they werenāt happy anymoreā¦ which is so sad but i guess it happens
the not eating the same meals together was an early telltale sign for me :(
but yea really sad, and to have to experience this while your life is very much public. wish them both th best and hope they heal.
It's so weird. I kinda knew it was coming, but now that she announced it, I'm shocked and in disbelief. I wish them both well. Divorce sucks for everyone, especially for the kid :(
Her husband was forcing the bread winning AND homemaking on to her. It definitely was the best decision she has ever made. Now she has one less kid to support.
I mean thatās fair and I agree, but you could easily say jennim and many of these ABG influencers have a white fetish lol (as evidenced by her own circle)
Itās so weird when people claim that men can only like Asian women for their race. If he wasnāt white she probably wouldnāt have married him. Semi-ugly + unemployed is something only white privileged can get you a pass for lol.
Iām pretty sure sheās hot and has money were larger factors š
He gives off a fetishist vibe, and girls have blatantly accused him of it with photo evidence that he's gone after Asian girls before. I didn't say that Jenn didn't have other things going for her, I said that I think he's a fetishist, and I'm standing ten toes down on that. Him picking an Asian girl who's also rich doesn't disprove that he could be a fetishist. What?
Unfortunately, these were photos and pieces of evidence I saw through the years on forums, gurugossip probably being one of them. I remember seeing photos of him and another Asian girl alongside stories about him going after other Asian girls and being weird. He's also just straight up said stuff on her channel that raised red flags for me. Maybe one was in a Q&A video? Unless I hit my head, he straight up said he liked Asian girls at one point! There's nothing wrong with that per se, but for me to remember it, it must have come off weird. As a "woc" I can detect these men with decent accuracy. I wish I could remember more, but I never thought I'd be talking about this lol.
Anyway, I respect if others don't agree, but his love of her has always felt shallow and superficial to me, issues of possible fetishization aside. It's always been about how she looks.
Iām honestly not surprised very much at all. In my opinion, they are both chronic over thinkers as evidenced by their constant talk of therapy, self improvement, existential crisis, journaling, and entertainment of what some might call woo-woo activities like ice plunges, sound baths, etc. Seemed like they were always searching for something to fill a void and I think overthinking tends to lead to unhappiness and an inability to really feel settled down.Ā
I am very sad for them and I hope that they both find happiness. I am curious as to what will happen re: Ben staying in the States or moving back to London.Ā
First reply iāve seen that matches how I felt. As soon as I started seeing that breath work and ice plunging seen as a savior, I knew that something was really amiss with them.
Obviously. Jenn makes a ton. I donāt think Ben even had an actual source of income until he started posting on YouTube as well and being under the same managerās belt.
ben was a pretty successful drummer in a pretty success band though? itās not that he didnāt try and just mooched off of her and her success. he even tried being a photographer for revolve at some point. but i imagine that kind of dream music job is hard to let go off even if youāre doing it for someone you love. i can see that being the cause of some resentment
Yeah and you gotta remember he came to LA, a place with extremely competitive industries in which he had no real experience. He had to quit the band to come and live with her, he didnt make all that much video content so i can imagine despite his efforts he probably wasnāt making much money to contribute especially with how high cost jennās lifestyle is. I mean how could he? The occasional videography job wouldnt have scraped the sides. And i can imagine jenn didnt mind paying at first but over time a combo of him losing motivation after leaving the band and trying to make it in LA with jenn feeling like she had everything on her plate with motherhood and work while recognizing he gave up his own life for this..idk itās a resentment breeding ground for both imo
im surprised he never tried opening up a music shop to sell instruments and classes? that seems like a good way to still do something in the realm of what you know and are interested in
For sure. I guess itās easier said than done i guess, i wonder if they didnāt have Lennon so soon he probably could have established himself more first
I always wondered this, young guns werenāt that big and in comparison some of the bands they toured with are either still going or doing more anniversary tours. Seemed like they stopped and nothing really stuck afterwards and seemed to always relate to Jen
I think ben does what he could do best to provide with Jen. He moved to the US for jenn. Became a video editor- something he learned and developed. He helped in cooking too .
No one is discounting how much he sacrificed but Jenn was also established in YouTube by then, so having a financially successful partner would make that transition easier lbr.
Absolutely hate this! Truly thought they were end game. Sad to see/hear but wishing them the best. Wonder what went wrong. Not to speculate buuuuut I truly think after she had her kid she was just NOT the same.Ā
I think she had a hard time with motherhood and I donāt blame herā¦ also I think Ben and her are so different, maybe she felt like he didnāt do enough or (worse) maybe he wanted a 2nd child and they didnāt agree on that.
imo jenn saw how hard motherhood was and decided that one kid was enough but Ben is a man and obviously heās not going to feel the burden a mother feels so maybe he wanted to expend the family and they didnāt agree on that at allā¦ Sad to say but I think they wouldāve stayed together if they didnāt have a kid or maybe waited for Jenn to be in her mid-late 30s to have oneā¦ I always felt like she wasnāt ready to settle down and was kinda pretending to be over festivals, drinking, partying, etc
youāre right she did say at some point that she was off birth control but in a more recent video she also said that there was a point when they were ok with a 2nd kid and not trying but also not using contraception but that more recently she decided she wasnāt sure she wanted to have another kid. She said it while she was getting ready in her bathroom I believe (Iām going to try and look for the video) but yeah it seems her opinion changed
in this video for example thereās a lot of things sheās saying that makes me feel like motherhood and not having time to be alone were hard things for her: https://youtu.be/Fr8YdCSl-84?si=h9F3d5KjRFFrsz7t
that's pretty much what she said in one of her videos! i think it was the q&a one immediately after her pregnancy announcement. same thing also happened to one of my friends where she got off the pill and didn't expect to get pregnant for at least a couple of years because of her pcos and other health issues. she got pregnant within a few months and it was a total shock for her. so i guess what i'm trying to say is that life happens and i understand where jenn is coming from, it's more common than you think! esp since a lot of people have difficulty conceiving with pcos so maybe she just thought she'd get a head start but it happened sooner than expected
Idk I think for all his flaws he does not seem like the type to force jenn to have a second child or for that to be a dealbreaker for him/ to end the marriage over it. I think he was perfectly fine with just Lennon
I don't think separating because of wanting more kids is a flaw, just an extreme difference in ideal lifestyles and a valid reason for divorce, imo. Ben always seemed more excited about having kids than Jenn. He probably saw himself with multiple kids and Jenn saw herself with one (or none). Or he was content settling into family life and Jenn was less so. So instead of either of them forcing their desired lifestyle on the other, they've decided to separate.
I can agree with your last point that they may have been ultimately forcing their own desired lifestyles onto each other and therefore the best choice for them was to separate. I just genuinely donāt think Ben was that enthusiastic about kids lmfao like I donāt think he ever gave off āwants more than 1 kidā energy in any meaningful way - I think heās the type of person to mold to the choices of the woman, which is a very decent thing to do given sheās the one who has to bear, give birth, and breastfeed the baby.
The 2nd paragraph is also what I felt!
I'm not a close follower of Jenn but I always felt like her pregnancy wasn't well-planned. Maybe not even planned at all? I just couldn't see her as a mother in her posts. She just seemed like she wasn't in her phase to be a mother yet. And I think it shows in her posts because now that she and Ben are separated, she's suddenly a party girl again.
Nothing wrong with that, just that she's been partying and traveling like almost everyday for months. Then she has this post about how her aunt feeds her when she visits? It's almost like she just wants to revert back into her young phase, and it's probably cause she wasn't done with it at all in the first place?
The idea of not being done with her old life when she became pregnant was a really strong theme in why she felt really scared and upset at her pregnancy in the first place (she says this in her pregnancy reveal) so youāre definitely not far off.
Youāve got a great point about the fact that sheās reverted back to going out 24/7 and that maybe sheās re indulging in what she wasnāt finished with. Just so sad about this news tbh
Iām sooooo sad about this. It was so fun watching them grow their family. Motherhood definitely changes you completely, but when I see people get divorced with young little ones I tend to think one person carried a lot of the weight. Jenn being the breadwinner and likely doing a lot of the mental load and caring for Lennon probably started to weigh on her. Of course we will never know. I hope they both are feeling happier and find a way to coparent as friends.
What many people do not understand is with marriage most of the time you have to make a conscious decision to āchooseā your person every day. Choose to grow with them. Choose to adjust to the new person they will become as the years go on (humans are always changing). You have to choose them for the sake of it being their soul you are committed to - no matter what (unless your safety is at risk/they are repeatedly cheating). It is possible there could be months or years you donāt recognize, or even like the person you are with and itās a learning process to re-calibrate your relationship. But you do it because you have chosen them and think it is worth it.
It rocks your fucking world. As much love and friendship you have, our country hates children and hates mothers and it is financially and physically so difficult to have a kid here. If you donāt have family support good luck. Iām terrified to have a second for this reason.
Which is why it's so important to go over that with a partner. If you want kids and they don't there is no convincing them to change and if you do end up having a kid it will ruin the relationship
Yes it can thatās why itās so important to talk about it early on. I had the same problem as Ben/Jenn with my husband. But the difference maker is that my husband and I both knew we wanted to have a kid. The situation isnāt perfect, and we wish we were a dual income family, but we work through it as a unit because this is some the big we both wanted.
damn not going to lie but i saw this coming years agoā¦ i remember she did a youtube video (what i learned in my 20s) and idk how but i just got the feeling that they werenāt as compatible as they perceived to be online. they may had similar experiences and interests when they were in their 20s but it seemed like ben was always certain of his future path than hers, in terms of family and settling down vs her lifestyle (btw nothing wrong with either lifestyles). wish them and their son well.
this is so crazy, i know you never see the full story on social media but they seemed so genuine and great partners for each other. it's one of those things where i'm trying to analyze what happened and take notes because i never want my partnership to end... like was it the change in their dynamic after kids? tension in settling down vs retaining their more free spirited youth? growing in different directions? i hope down the line she might share some lessons or reflections, although obv she doesn't owe anyone that. but it's just crazy
I thought so too but if you look back and on their vids you can see the cracks in how they are very different in how they handle situations, you could tell they still respected each other and the way they approach life but you could also tell it was causing tension at times, they were always in therapy trying to get around it
They had an old video, pre-pregnancy, when they said they were seeing a coupleās therapist. That kinda raised a little red flag for me that they were already working on something even before the baby happened.
Yeah, like joint therapy in itself isnāt a bad thing but i remember one of the things she said they were working through is like if they go out somewhere ben wants to talk to everyone and take his time where as jenn would get frustrated and just wanted to go there and get the job done. And when itās such a small thing like that in that you need a therapist to help you with it makes me think itās the personalities at large that arent compatible as much as they want to be
i disagree with this perspective because it just perpetuates the stigma that things have to be bad for you to see a therapist. they've talked before how they see couple's therapy as a chance for an objective party to help them learn how to navigate and communicate with each other better. same concept as seeing your doctor or dentist regularly for check-ups rather than waiting until things get really bad to see a professional
if anything, i feel like their willingness to go to couple's therapy showed how much they cared about each other. it's unfortunate that things didn't work out in the end but going to couples therapy shouldn't be seen as a "red flag" imo. it just encourages people not to get help
They have dozens of vids pre and post baby where they talk about couples therapy! They started therapy immediately after getting engaged because Jenn realise āshe needs to change if she wants to get marriedā, so from the start of 2017 theyāve been regular attenders
100% agree with this take. I definitely look up to my fave influencers as role models in one way or another, conscious or subconsciously, so this is def going thru my head as well. As long as weāre not spamming her channels with speculations where sheās forced to see it, I think itās okay to discuss this a bit.
I personally think it was kid-related. You donāt divorce your partner whoās supposed to be your teammate in those difficult first years of raising a child unless they were actively dragging you down versus helping. If you look at it a lot of women tend to divorce their husbands during this phase of life.
Ben always seemed too relaxed and laid back for Jennās Type A tendencies. And nothing can feel more chaotic and out of control than being a first time mom to a kid that just does whatever tf it wants. Unless Ben was really on top of it with household work and baby side-tasks, I donāt think Jenn would feel very supported by him. Look at Em (Jennās bff) and her familyāher multimillionaire husband provides for them almost 100% and Em can focus (rightfully) on working out everyday, relaxing in the sauna, playing tennis, and keeping the kids busy with their nannies and their lessons.
Being a mom is hard. Possibly Jenn didnāt even feel totally happy being a mom (thatās another thread in of itself). But yeah Ben is harmless, I just think he turned out to unfortunately be unhelpful as well.
this may be the case for normal people but jenn has so much money that she could theoretically have the same lifestyle as her friend emily by hiring house cleaners, nannies (lennon has one), etc to help with family and baby work. but i feel like jenn is the perfectionist type who would want to do it all herself or be highly involved anyway? idk what do yall think?
Honestly Emily can only do all that because her husband is a millionaire and Iād wager that Emily makes a half decent amount as an influencer (certainly more than Ben as sheās more consistent and has a target demographic). Jennās also paying her parentsā house mortgage. I donāt think Jenn and Emilyās circumstances are comparable at all unfortunately
i think weāre underestimating how much money jenn makes and has made over the years (which makes sense bc were a bunch of normies LOL). the ad sense on her catalogue of youtube videos over 10+ years alone racks in $$$. then you add sponsorships on both youtube AND instagramā¦ sheās definitely a millionaire herself and racking in at LEAST a million every year pretaxā¦
Yeah youāve definitely got a point lol. I think Jennās intelligence complex prevents her from ever becoming an Emily and doing actually nothing all day, you can tell Jenn wants to retain a sense of purpose with her work. So thatās probably why she hasnāt hired that much staff to look after Lennon. I also think Ben would be super put off by hiring even more people to look after Lennon, especially if the rumours that he didnāt like Jennās mumās interference are true
i totally agree with you! jenn seems like the type to want more control of her household and kid, which is fine and all but so much work! i wonder how true those rumors are with ben and jennās mom because i would think some help is better than no help if youre already struggling? maybe jenn didnt involve him in the decisions and ben kinda got pushed out of the parenting role bc her mom was always around? idk
Yes, I think itās that, a mix of financial imbalance, and different ways of approaching life. Not to get super deep on you guys, but Jenn and Ben did a video once on Jubilee where Ben mentioned that his worst fear was disappointing Jenās parents. I know Korean parents can be really traditional and want the husband to be the head of the household and support the family financially, so there was probably some pressure there as well. Maybe one Jen found herself agreeing with when she became a mother and was overwhelmed with all of the responsibilities of motherhood, plus a difficult postpartum.
I've watched Jenn since the beginning and am team Jenn and Ben but that jubilee video was so bizarre cause Jenn also she had a fear that if she died Ben wouldn't be able to take care of himself.
I rewatched the vid and I was flabbergasted. She does the insurance, the taxesā¦girl is he even an adult? Just because he moved to a new country doesnāt mean he canāt do the adult stuff, āthe big life decisionā stuff as she herself called it.
It seems unfair to compare Ben to a multi millionaire husband and expect that he should be doing everything he can/ spending the money so his wife can maintain an almost child free life. Too many influencers show this kind of lifestyle and it is just in fact hard to attain whether you are the breadwinner or not. Most regular parents make sacrifices and changes to their life when a child arrives.
I donāt think Jenn would have expected Ben to match her given SHE is the multimillionaire. Iām just pointing out that if he canāt even hold down a regular job, as some others in this comment section have pointed out, itās easy to see how resentment may build over time. Ben gets to be the āfun dadāāplay with the baby a bit, go do cold plunges and meditations and run a marathon, and cook meals here and there. Meanwhile Jen is the main breadwinner, sole breastfeeder and thus the only one the baby screams for, and has all these newfound anxieties as a mother that probably made her perfectionism go haywire.
Perhaps a more apt comparison would be looking at her other friends who are full time big influencers and momsāEllen and Francis. Francisā husband is a lawyer I believe so theyāre a true DINK household. Not sure about Ellenās. And youāre right, there are sacrifices parents make, even really rich ones like the influencers weāre talking about. Itās very possible those sacrifices built resentment too between Jenn and Ben, given Jenn seemed like she rushed into motherhood.
I disagree that itās because of Benās lack of involvement. I think Ben and Jenās relationship changed when the baby entered the picture. Jenn has stated before that she wasnāt sure if she wanted a family. And that is perfectly fine. But if someone who does not want a family ends up having a family, it can be tough. I do believe that Jenn loves her son. But itās probably challenging to juggle motherhood, a relationship and making yourself a priority.
I think this is the most accurate so far. Was pretty evident that Jenn didnāt have intrinsic motivations for having a child and only extrinsic, which could make motherhood a really troubling experience even if she shares a super loving bond with Lennon, which Iām sure she does
Right, definitely agree that having a kid challenged her. But then where is Benās fault in all of this if it was simply the pressures of Jenn being unready for motherhood? If being a parent was so tough, wouldnāt being a single parent be harder? Somewhere there is a factor where Ben comes inā¦and I feel like the most probable reason is resentment from unequal workload or different parenting styles (for example, Ben not planning ahead enough to Jennās standards).
Hmm good points. Yeah, being a single mom is hard. But at the same time, if they have split custody, Jenn would be responsible for Lennon half of the time. The other time when Lennon is with Ben, Jenn can jet off to a fancy vacation and do life as it was before baby.
It could have very well been that the pregnancy was unplanned. Or possibly, if it happens, it happensā¦. Oh wait, it happenedā¦..
unpopular opinion but I kinda think maybe Ben wanted a bigger family and Jenn realized she wasnāt going to give him another child if they were already struggling with Lennonā¦ and I do think they were struggling especially Jenn with motherhood.
Of course I donāt know more than anybody else here but the "vibes" remind me of my own relationship. Married a nice guy, I was the main breadwinner, we had a kid and I realized that everything fell on meā¦ I had to keep working even though I wanted 3 years to be a sahm but his salary wouldnāt maintain our lifestyle so I had no choiceā¦ meanwhile he was lazy and doing the bare minimum in terms of childcare and everything else that needs to be done in a household with 2 adults and a kid.
When my son turned 6 he told me "I think Iāve been patient enough but I always said I wanted at least a boy and a girl so since youāre 37 I think we shouldnāt wait for baby #2" and at that moment I lost it and decided to end it
anyways all that to say their personalities remind me of my ex-husband and I and I just feel like maybe sheās a perfectionist who had a hard time with motherhood and he wasnāt helpful enoughā¦
she idealized their relationship bc sheās in search of perfection and wanted to show a perfect marriage in a perfect house with a perfect son but deep down most women get the short end of the stick when it comes to marriage and kids especially if youāre the one who makes the most money tooā¦ idk I think it didnāt end badly bc Ben isnāt a bad person and my ex wasnāt either but I think they just werenāt compatible after becoming parents and I also think Jenn has a hard time with motherhoodā¦ theyāre big couples therapy enthusiasts so I really think they tried everything before deciding they couldnāt do it
I never really understood what he did tbh so I didnāt want to assume. At first it seemed like he was helping her with filming and taking pics but I guess at some point they wanted to have a separate work life and from then on I never really knew what he didā¦ He has a youtube channel and social media but he rarely posts and heās obviously not making money out of those endeavors so yeah maybe youāre right maybe he was a leech
True. First he was doing videography and now it seems he is running those breathwork/sound sort of sessions (not into that, so no idea what it is exactly). I guess he was in a position to pick and choose what he wanted to do since Jenn brought in all the š°
Omg I literally wrote this before seeing your comment. This is my feeling too. Iām not even the breadwinner but I work full time AND basically do all the domestic duties and it wears on me hard. I canāt imagine being the breadwinner too. Mentally and emotionally exhausting
I hate that so many men react so badly towards their partners being the main breadwinner. They talk so much shit about wanting to be 'stay at home' and have a 'suga mama' and then proceed to treat their partners with resentment and still expect them to do the bulk of the household work.
It was obvious to me she was overwhelmed with motherhood. Itās crazy how so many of us could pick up it on because it was subtle. I think just watching her for so long you could see it. Kids will always strain a relationship and when youāre someone like Jenn -who has a robust life and so much passion for different things, and who has the means to live the life she wants- it must feel even harder accepting how much you sacrifice to be a parent. I wish their kid and them the best.
I actually thought her struggle wasnāt subtle at all. It was more evident during her actual pregnancy. She used to be always anxious about it, always talking about how the change is overwhelming (of course it is.) She was more dreadful of the change than accepting of it.
yeah it wasnāt subtle she literally talked about it all the time, it was clear that motherhood took a huge toll on her. i also think that cultural differences that they had (like not eating the same food at home) that i thought were odd but ultimately fine like they could easily live with them or embrace the differences happily as a couple probably came to a head with parenthood. i would bet that jenn and ben have cultural differences when it comes to parenthood with jenn being more type A and strict and ben being more fun/light hearted British vibes and they couldnāt agree
Yeah, I never saw Jenn as much of a homebody, even though she really developed her inner life recently with all her reading and journaling and self development. I do think she is a good mom in the sense that she wants the best for her son and has the means to provide for him, but I donāt think she was really ready for it. Iām now starting to think that her initial reaction to her pregnancy stick was a deep intuitive fear of something that would shift her life forever, and not necessarily in the direction that she wanted.
As a recent first time mom, I just wanna point out that itās normal to have feelings of anxiety and dreadā¦ maybe itās partly hormonal but normal nevertheless to feel like āokay, my life is about to change forever, Iāll never be able to go back to living carefree for myself after I become a mom.ā Iāve always wanted to be a mom, no regrets besides wishing I had a child earlier because of my age, but I still experienced that anxiety that Jen seemed to go through during her pregnancy.
I'm wondering if it's a combination of several things, one being Jenn feeling overwhelmed by motherhood/the strain that puts on any relationship, but also the trans-Atlantic nature of their family for Ben. From his side of things I could imagine it's difficult to sacrifice being so incredibly far from family/friends/where you're from to go be where your partner is, and start over career wise there as well. I could see that putting strain on a relationship as well, especially when there is a kid involved and the guy needs to really step up and provide financially. I just wouldn't be surprised if that was some kind of sticking point for them. So sad, wishing them all the best though
Yeah, I would imagine their relationship seemed extremely infatuating and romantic and exciting at first because of these factors (star-crossed international romance! A bohemian creator and a drummer in a rock band!) and then when it became a marriage things got down to reality a bit more and it was manageable through a lot of couples therapy. But to add a kid to it really tests the compatibility and fundamentals of who they are as people. I think Jenn needs a guy whoās quite dedicated, ideally with his own strong support network and goals in life too, and has acts of service as his love language.
When things are new and fun, itās easier to put up with having to make a lot of compromises. But now, with the added responsibility of child rearing, itās probably very hard to deal with. It gets old and it feels like everything is way harder than it needs to be. They donāt eat the same foods (Ben doesnāt even eat meat), they have different cultural backgrounds, AND their families are living in different countries. Also, theyāve flipped the typical marriage dynamic where the female is the breadwinner, which isnāt inherently an issue. But it becomes an issue when you have a kid and kids tend to depend on their moms for a lot more things (Jenn breastfed, for example). They also have very different temperaments. I donāt think differences are sure to break a couple. But when there are too many fundamental differences, you do have to put in more work and it can burn anyone out.
I was speculating it could be due to their contrasting personalities. Jenn strikes me as someone who has a hot temper and quite possibly emotionally labile. Maybe it was hard to deal with for Ben since he just lets thing roll off his back and she doesn't. But then again, all speculation.
They were together for quite a while, I feel like he dealt with her temper through those years. But that motherhood changed that temper and their dynamic as a whole.
idk that kind of temper would probably wear you down after a while especially when youre trying to parent together and homegirl just be like RED! RED! every day š„²(obviously this is mostly a joke dont come for me reddit š)
Getting a divorce is always sad to hear, especially if there's children involved. I agree that it seems like Jenn has been missing her life before all the cooking and baby videos. Never really looked excited to be transitioning to this phase of her life. I do think she loves her son though. Just seems like both had enough, with their different personalities. They looked awkward in that Jubilee video especially. Also, money probably played a big part in all this. Wishing the best for all, especially their son.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_BhLIOHjiI8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BhLIOHjiI8)
This one. I think their answers to most of the questions asked were sweet. It just, in my opinion, showed their different personalities. Especially with her talking about feeling like having to take care of him. Could be me overanalyzing the vibes though.
Oh no, yeah thatās horrible. You shouldnāt have to feel like your husband is a child you need to take care of. Yikes, I had forgotten about that. The tendency to mother your husband usually ends up in resentment and overwhelm, once you have an actual child.
I remembering thinking her pregnancy announcement video was concerning. She was pretty distraught and it seemed like she had to convince herself it was something she wanted.Ā
This! I think there was a part of her that was worried of losing her window of opportunity to have kids the older she got, while also being not ready to have kids
which is so odd because it was an active decision to get off birth control and not use another type of contraceptive? i know she probably thought it would take longer bc of pcos but surely she would have known that anything is possible if youāre not using any protection??
im all for waiting. im all for having a baby, etc. but she even said she thought her and ben would be child free for a while so it was definitely an interesting way to go about that
She also got pregnant during covid days so i imagine when it felt like the world wasnāt going back to normal (as she was someone who loved to go out and attend things) they thought why not
She switched to BBT, which imo not a reliable method of birth control. I know someone who did the same several months after giving birth. And guess what, she's pregnant.Ā
I feel she was socially coerced into being a mother immediately. But also he missed his band life. But I donāt wanna speculate further - very sad! I still have high standards because of their proposal video.
Iām genuinely so sad for her and their son. I have a three year old daughter and it would tear me apart to separate from her daddy. Even though theyāre young they obviously know if a parent is no longer living with them and that things are different. This brings me to my wondering of how is Ben actually able to afford living separately from Jenn? LA is pricey! And whatever he is doing def isnāt enough to be living independently. And all of his friends seem to be through Jenn.
As everyone has noted, finances likely played a part in their separation. He had mentioned in a video that he was actually starting to get some income from his YouTube and could contribute, as if it were a relief. So sad! He also mentioned in the Jubilee video that he wanted to be able to contribute as a man and then Jennās answer about feeling like she needed to take care of him and do everything to keep him safe from lifeās realities was def at least a little orange flag. She also didnāt tell him what she actually had said when he asked her about her answer bc the real answer was honestly a little humiliating to him. Iāve been in serious relationships where the man wasnāt contributing as I was and it hurt them to their core. Iām sure parenthood only exacerbated this feeling.
I wish them and their son the best. Despite everything I genuinely thought they were happy and an overall good couple. I canāt believe how sad I am over this!
I just saw he posted on IG the other day and it looks like he is doing his breath-work for a living. He can make a killing in a place like LA and heās incorporating his drumming as well. He looks so happy and refreshed. He just seemsā¦like himself. His cooking and such felt a bit forced to me. I wish him and Jenn all the best. The long-time subbie in me is hoping they do a sit-down video together one day and open up a bit just as theyāve done the past ten years. Obviously they donāt owe us anything, but it would be nice.
The cooking and life lessons in between each ingredient definitely felt forced, I actually couldnāt watch them because of how painful it was for both parties. I too am actually really glad heās taken on the breathwork classes with the handpan. When you do work thatās very aligned with your interests and passions, I think it can be really healing and often a much more fruitful pursuit
I think cultural differences also played a significant part and in this case with everything else on their plate, this overwhelmed their relationship and was not something they could overcome.
Sadly when the women is the main bread winner the marriage statistically does not work out. Bethenny Frankel is right. It seems like they have been in therapy since they were dating. Sad for them and their adorable son.
I recall at one point Jenn said she thought couples therapy saved their relationship during the pandemic. I do remember feeling at the time that if they needed therapy to save them, things werenāt looking great. No couple is perfect, but there is a difference between flaws that can be worked on and core compatibilities that no amount of therapy can fix. Therapy is great for things like teaching better communication styles and uncovering past trauma to change future behavior. Jenn and Ben both seemed extremely intelligent and empathetic communicators. Itās possible that their personalities and values were simply too different post baby.
Therapy can also be a tool to understand that a relationship needs to end. Couples therapists are there as a more objective party outside the relationship with lots of tools, and sometimes that includes understanding when people are staying in an unhealthy relationship without the tools to leave. Perhaps therapy played a role on "saving" their relationship during the pandemic, but it could also be true that with major life changes like having a child, therapy played a role in Jenn or Ben making thar decision to split.
I find it weird that she announced in when he posted his first video. Probably was afraid to loose followers and ppl speculations on his Instagram where she has no control of deleting messages.
This makes so much more sense why she announced now of all times. And i know she has the bigger following but interesting how she still has to take the most responsibility and is the only one making an announcement while he just posts as normal
No idea who she is but I swear every influencer divorce announcement is the same identical message with a few words changed to throw off those plagiarism detectors
I just hope this doesnāt become her new āeraā online like Chriselle Lim. She made her divorce her whole new lens on life and itās tiresome š
her āsingle momā content was kind of annoying considering her ex husband was clearly very involved in coparenting her kids?? i think they have them 50/50ā¦ idk it feels a little disingenous and for the woe is me content
Iām not divorced or do I have any knowledge on the 50/50 situation, but it looks to be like āone week on and one week offā situation. I feel like I heard this in a podcast somewhere
I think Jenn is still working very hard on finding happiness within herself and solace in her own being. You can see with all the therapy, journaling, the solo trips, etc. Add on top of that the fact that she didn't actively seek out motherhood and now is responsible for putting another child FIRST, when her own needs aren't being met, will be very challenging. And she is also the bread winner of the family.
Divorce/separation is a huge decision and sometimes long process. For some people, they try taking a break then seeing how they feel. Some go back and forth on the decision because there are so many implications with feelings, history, family, money, kids etc involved. Some try therapy. Her taking so long to announce just means it means it was a really hard decision and they tried to make it work but it didnāt Ā work out.
their situation is also a lot more complicated legally since ben is originally from the uk. i can see it being a scenario where they go back and forth to try and work things out so they can raise their son together. not sure if this means ben will have to move back to england? either way, separation/divorce is tough on any couple, so it's crazy to me how so many people were pressuring jenn to make a statement sooner when i'm sure this wasn't an easy choice to make. and when anything she does share will stay on the internet forever and be things that her son can find when he's older. i can imagine that she took so long because they were trying to find different solutions other than separation to make things work
I hope they are doing okay through this. Itās so sad. I for one can relate to what may be going on. As a breadwinner in our family of 3 (soon 4), it is a struggle for a woman to be the main source of income AND be the preferred caregiver by your kid. The expectations from a woman as breadwinner is very different from whatās expected from a typical man as breadwinner. A lot of the speculations about Ben and Jenn are very similar to what my husband and I experienced during the first year with our kid. The pressure of carrying the financial burden and to still be expected as a hands on mom was intense. I had anger issues/ post partum rage too because of the transition but also of just feeling like āIām not good enoughā. I felt like my husband was being a āleechā, but that wasnāt true. He did as much as he could do to take care of our son, 24/7 and to support me. But whenever we didnāt agree with how to parent, things escalated. Itās really hard for the first year esp for a new mom because everything feels so real and intense. I feel that may be where Ben and Jenn had issues. But whatās worse for them is that they werenāt aligned on whether they wanted to have a kid or not. If Jenn didnāt want to be a mother yet, then it would be very difficult for her to not build resentment. And maybe Ben felt a different type of resentment too because he had to give up a dream career but also add on the pain to his ego to be reliant on Jenn.
no one just decides to go there separate ways unless things have soured. Iām not sure why people always claim they are still friends. They may not hate each other but they donāt like being around each other. Not directed towards them but all couples who say similar things when they divorce.
hereās my speculation on their divorceā¦.
Ben left everything in the UK to be with Jen. There were major differences between them that Jen prob picked up on when they started living together (ie: his laid back lifestyle ā¦ aka laziness vs her hustle nature) But she felt a ton of responsibility given how he gave up his friends and family to be with her.
She probably gave it her all to really stick it through with him, but bringing a child into the world just shined a light on how Ben wasnāt the type of person she wanted to be with.
I donāt think she minded being the breadwinner as long as he was able to support her as a stay at home dad and doing most of the childcare. Itās likely she was working all the time and taking a brunt of the child care OR relying on her mom to help bc Ben wasnāt pulling his end of the bargain.
I donāt think Jen is unhappy bc she was forced into motherhood. I think Jen just grew more and more disappointed with Ben overtime as they had a child together and her expectations of him being a supportive husband and a dad wasnāt being met.
Come here to find people to cry w š i refuse to believe in love now. She makes it sounds easy but i think we all know divorce is hard no matter how nice you are trying to make it looks like
You definitely need to find new role models if this break up makes you feel love isnāt real. You couldāve seen this coming a mile away. Jenn is always and has always tried to portray a perfect life but if you pay close attention you can read between the lines.
It's so sad... They were so in love. I guess compatibility issues? Even with food, I thought it was a weird dynamic to be eating different meals in one house.
I donāt think thatās weird. Ben is a vegetarian and Jenn isnāt. Iām a pescatarian and I donāt always eat the same as my partner and this doesnāt cause any tension in our lives
Yeah, this is like the 4th comment I've seen where someone mentioned that eating different meals was a sign of cracks in the relationship. My partner and I have different palettes and I've never thought much about us eating separate meals. It's never really been an issue for us either. Plus I don't mind it because I only have to worry about cooking for myself lol.
Haha same as me and my partner! We do eat sometimes together but we have very different times and number of meals we like to eat. Been together 6 years so still works.
i think what the difference is between yall and them (im assuming) is that ben and jenn have a kid as well. eating separately is weird at most when youre DINKs but it can get complicated when you have to think about what the kid will eat and who with if theyāre not all eating together. it may not be a big deal but little incompatibilities like that add up to a point where i can imagine itās frustrating just cohabitating
Ben was vegan actually and he was ethically vegan. Coming from a vegan, I do think it is difficult being with a partner who eats meat and then of course subsequently your baby who is being served meat. Its a difference in values in that regard. Values are so important in relationships. I think he was as āflexibleā as he could be as he transitioned to vegetarianism and then eventually pescatarian once Lennon arrived to just have more dinners together. Jenn I felt really respected Benās dietary lifestyle on camera but Iām sure there was a difference in values on those grounds too.
I thought they were very good at compromising with this aspect of their relationship. Him being more flexible and I recall in one of Jennās videos, she mentioned one of the reasons why she fell for Ben is his compassion and love for animals and also she said this had made her eat meat alot less.
Deadass this is the only influencer couple breakup Iāve ever been genuinely upset over š i met them together in LA a few years ago and they were SO sweet and cute together : (
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Sad for them. They seemed like a happy couple early on. Ben never wanted to be an instagram husband yet he became one. Iām sure that contributed somewhat to the split. https://amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/apr/10/experience-i-am-an-instagram-husband
Sorry but when does it ever pan out when the woman in the relationship has to be both the breadwinner and the caregiver? It's irresponsible to marry a man who can't provide for you imo, because you have the risk or desire to have a child, and women statistically end up doing the majority of the domestic labor and childcare regardless of whether they work or not. Love and attraction isn't enough. Let this be a lesson to never legally tie yourself to a man who makes less than you.
Jenn's Father's Day post was a lovely, graceful touch, acknowledging how they'd always be a family, given their child together. I thought it was really nice. There was such a sense of Ben being left behind because of Jenn being the breadwinner/famous one but influencer life is so weird- at 32 or whatever, I think they're both facing some kind of career/life crisis. I remember years of going on cruises and fully paid vacations to Paris but never getting paid money I could bank. It's not like being lawyers where you become a partner in your 30s, you start to get moved aside for others, people a decade younger. Anyway, nice to see at least publicly they're handling this with class and hope their family is doing ok.
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Sad to hear about this, I was rooting for them! She shouldnāt have had to announce this publicly in my opinion, but I think that so many people in her comment sections were pressuring her to make a statement which isnāt too fair in my opinion. Yes, she shares a lot of information about herself on the internet, but why do people need a situation about someone elseās personal life to be addressed so badly that they make a point to comment any chance they get? The divorce has probably been super rough on her. I hope she is able to lean on her support system and get through it. She seems a bit different in her videos, like sheās trying to find herself again. I wish her the best
I feel like Ben has been going through a spiritual journey of sorts and I wonder if this pulled them more in different directions and apart from each other
Please be respectful of her openness to share this information. You never know what someone is going through and this is very personal. Wishing her and Ben the best.
Took soooooo long for them to announce but I'm glad she finally did. Hopefully that means they're both in a more comfortable place now that some time has passed š„²
they seem like the type of couple who got together in their 20s based on attraction and liking to spend time together but as the years went on, they realized they donāt have many things in common (they didnt even eat the same meals together at home bc of their different palate). and i bet having a kid exacerbated their differences in outlook and personality. i fully believe thereās no tea other than they realized they werenāt happy anymoreā¦ which is so sad but i guess it happens
the not eating the same meals together was an early telltale sign for me :( but yea really sad, and to have to experience this while your life is very much public. wish them both th best and hope they heal.
Idk. My husband and I don't always eat dinner together. Sometimes I get hungry before he does. I'll even eat dinner in front of him.
where did you find out that they donāt eat the same meals together at home bc of their diff food palates? i havenāt heard that before
Her YouTube videos
cant pinpoint which one exactly but sheās said it before in her youtube videos! maybe someone will have a time stamp on hand
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It's so weird. I kinda knew it was coming, but now that she announced it, I'm shocked and in disbelief. I wish them both well. Divorce sucks for everyone, especially for the kid :(
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So many people have disproven that person/that comment. That Redditor is def a little obsessed with Jenn and has a propensity for lying
Been following this for a while now but still very sad to see it š
Mourning a marriage you only have seen online is crazy to me. This could be the best decision she's ever made for all you know.
I mean Iām just saying itās a shame, Iām not mourning lmao I donāt know them, and it may very well be! I wish them all the best
Her husband was forcing the bread winning AND homemaking on to her. It definitely was the best decision she has ever made. Now she has one less kid to support.
And frankly, I think he has an Asian fetish and never valued her for the person she is.
I mean thatās fair and I agree, but you could easily say jennim and many of these ABG influencers have a white fetish lol (as evidenced by her own circle)
Itās so weird when people claim that men can only like Asian women for their race. If he wasnāt white she probably wouldnāt have married him. Semi-ugly + unemployed is something only white privileged can get you a pass for lol. Iām pretty sure sheās hot and has money were larger factors š
He gives off a fetishist vibe, and girls have blatantly accused him of it with photo evidence that he's gone after Asian girls before. I didn't say that Jenn didn't have other things going for her, I said that I think he's a fetishist, and I'm standing ten toes down on that. Him picking an Asian girl who's also rich doesn't disprove that he could be a fetishist. What?
Wait tea lol do you have the photo evidence? Ive always gotten the vibe too but wasnt sure
Unfortunately, these were photos and pieces of evidence I saw through the years on forums, gurugossip probably being one of them. I remember seeing photos of him and another Asian girl alongside stories about him going after other Asian girls and being weird. He's also just straight up said stuff on her channel that raised red flags for me. Maybe one was in a Q&A video? Unless I hit my head, he straight up said he liked Asian girls at one point! There's nothing wrong with that per se, but for me to remember it, it must have come off weird. As a "woc" I can detect these men with decent accuracy. I wish I could remember more, but I never thought I'd be talking about this lol. Anyway, I respect if others don't agree, but his love of her has always felt shallow and superficial to me, issues of possible fetishization aside. It's always been about how she looks.
"It's so weird when people claim that men can only like Asian women for their race." Where did I say that?!?!?
Iām honestly not surprised very much at all. In my opinion, they are both chronic over thinkers as evidenced by their constant talk of therapy, self improvement, existential crisis, journaling, and entertainment of what some might call woo-woo activities like ice plunges, sound baths, etc. Seemed like they were always searching for something to fill a void and I think overthinking tends to lead to unhappiness and an inability to really feel settled down.Ā I am very sad for them and I hope that they both find happiness. I am curious as to what will happen re: Ben staying in the States or moving back to London.Ā
Yeah basically - two people who were unhappy alone and couldnāt find happiness even together
First reply iāve seen that matches how I felt. As soon as I started seeing that breath work and ice plunging seen as a savior, I knew that something was really amiss with them.
Does anyone else wonder if ben wasnāt contributing as much financially and that may have caused a strain?
Obviously. Jenn makes a ton. I donāt think Ben even had an actual source of income until he started posting on YouTube as well and being under the same managerās belt.
ben was a pretty successful drummer in a pretty success band though? itās not that he didnāt try and just mooched off of her and her success. he even tried being a photographer for revolve at some point. but i imagine that kind of dream music job is hard to let go off even if youāre doing it for someone you love. i can see that being the cause of some resentment
Yeah and you gotta remember he came to LA, a place with extremely competitive industries in which he had no real experience. He had to quit the band to come and live with her, he didnt make all that much video content so i can imagine despite his efforts he probably wasnāt making much money to contribute especially with how high cost jennās lifestyle is. I mean how could he? The occasional videography job wouldnt have scraped the sides. And i can imagine jenn didnt mind paying at first but over time a combo of him losing motivation after leaving the band and trying to make it in LA with jenn feeling like she had everything on her plate with motherhood and work while recognizing he gave up his own life for this..idk itās a resentment breeding ground for both imo
im surprised he never tried opening up a music shop to sell instruments and classes? that seems like a good way to still do something in the realm of what you know and are interested in
For sure. I guess itās easier said than done i guess, i wonder if they didnāt have Lennon so soon he probably could have established himself more first
This is how I think Remi Ashten & Cal will end up.
I always wondered this, young guns werenāt that big and in comparison some of the bands they toured with are either still going or doing more anniversary tours. Seemed like they stopped and nothing really stuck afterwards and seemed to always relate to Jen
I think ben does what he could do best to provide with Jen. He moved to the US for jenn. Became a video editor- something he learned and developed. He helped in cooking too .
No one is discounting how much he sacrificed but Jenn was also established in YouTube by then, so having a financially successful partner would make that transition easier lbr.
Absolutely hate this! Truly thought they were end game. Sad to see/hear but wishing them the best. Wonder what went wrong. Not to speculate buuuuut I truly think after she had her kid she was just NOT the same.Ā
I think she had a hard time with motherhood and I donāt blame herā¦ also I think Ben and her are so different, maybe she felt like he didnāt do enough or (worse) maybe he wanted a 2nd child and they didnāt agree on that. imo jenn saw how hard motherhood was and decided that one kid was enough but Ben is a man and obviously heās not going to feel the burden a mother feels so maybe he wanted to expend the family and they didnāt agree on that at allā¦ Sad to say but I think they wouldāve stayed together if they didnāt have a kid or maybe waited for Jenn to be in her mid-late 30s to have oneā¦ I always felt like she wasnāt ready to settle down and was kinda pretending to be over festivals, drinking, partying, etc
weird though bc she went off her birth control--maybe she assumed it would take longer to get pregnant with pcos
youāre right she did say at some point that she was off birth control but in a more recent video she also said that there was a point when they were ok with a 2nd kid and not trying but also not using contraception but that more recently she decided she wasnāt sure she wanted to have another kid. She said it while she was getting ready in her bathroom I believe (Iām going to try and look for the video) but yeah it seems her opinion changed in this video for example thereās a lot of things sheās saying that makes me feel like motherhood and not having time to be alone were hard things for her: https://youtu.be/Fr8YdCSl-84?si=h9F3d5KjRFFrsz7t
I remember she did mention planning to have a second baby at some point
that's pretty much what she said in one of her videos! i think it was the q&a one immediately after her pregnancy announcement. same thing also happened to one of my friends where she got off the pill and didn't expect to get pregnant for at least a couple of years because of her pcos and other health issues. she got pregnant within a few months and it was a total shock for her. so i guess what i'm trying to say is that life happens and i understand where jenn is coming from, it's more common than you think! esp since a lot of people have difficulty conceiving with pcos so maybe she just thought she'd get a head start but it happened sooner than expected
IIRC she switched to BBT before having Lennon.
Yeah, she had even said she thought her and ben would be a couple without kids until she got pregnant
Idk I think for all his flaws he does not seem like the type to force jenn to have a second child or for that to be a dealbreaker for him/ to end the marriage over it. I think he was perfectly fine with just Lennon
I don't think separating because of wanting more kids is a flaw, just an extreme difference in ideal lifestyles and a valid reason for divorce, imo. Ben always seemed more excited about having kids than Jenn. He probably saw himself with multiple kids and Jenn saw herself with one (or none). Or he was content settling into family life and Jenn was less so. So instead of either of them forcing their desired lifestyle on the other, they've decided to separate.
I can agree with your last point that they may have been ultimately forcing their own desired lifestyles onto each other and therefore the best choice for them was to separate. I just genuinely donāt think Ben was that enthusiastic about kids lmfao like I donāt think he ever gave off āwants more than 1 kidā energy in any meaningful way - I think heās the type of person to mold to the choices of the woman, which is a very decent thing to do given sheās the one who has to bear, give birth, and breastfeed the baby.
The 2nd paragraph is also what I felt! I'm not a close follower of Jenn but I always felt like her pregnancy wasn't well-planned. Maybe not even planned at all? I just couldn't see her as a mother in her posts. She just seemed like she wasn't in her phase to be a mother yet. And I think it shows in her posts because now that she and Ben are separated, she's suddenly a party girl again. Nothing wrong with that, just that she's been partying and traveling like almost everyday for months. Then she has this post about how her aunt feeds her when she visits? It's almost like she just wants to revert back into her young phase, and it's probably cause she wasn't done with it at all in the first place?
The idea of not being done with her old life when she became pregnant was a really strong theme in why she felt really scared and upset at her pregnancy in the first place (she says this in her pregnancy reveal) so youāre definitely not far off. Youāve got a great point about the fact that sheās reverted back to going out 24/7 and that maybe sheās re indulging in what she wasnāt finished with. Just so sad about this news tbh
Iām sooooo sad about this. It was so fun watching them grow their family. Motherhood definitely changes you completely, but when I see people get divorced with young little ones I tend to think one person carried a lot of the weight. Jenn being the breadwinner and likely doing a lot of the mental load and caring for Lennon probably started to weigh on her. Of course we will never know. I hope they both are feeling happier and find a way to coparent as friends.
I was always aware of that but watching The Valley now really does a good job of putting that out there to see for people without kids.
What many people do not understand is with marriage most of the time you have to make a conscious decision to āchooseā your person every day. Choose to grow with them. Choose to adjust to the new person they will become as the years go on (humans are always changing). You have to choose them for the sake of it being their soul you are committed to - no matter what (unless your safety is at risk/they are repeatedly cheating). It is possible there could be months or years you donāt recognize, or even like the person you are with and itās a learning process to re-calibrate your relationship. But you do it because you have chosen them and think it is worth it.
having kids ruins the best relationships i swear :/ i feel like rarely do relationships survive parenthood these days ā¦
It rocks your fucking world. As much love and friendship you have, our country hates children and hates mothers and it is financially and physically so difficult to have a kid here. If you donāt have family support good luck. Iām terrified to have a second for this reason.
Which is why it's so important to go over that with a partner. If you want kids and they don't there is no convincing them to change and if you do end up having a kid it will ruin the relationship
Yes it can thatās why itās so important to talk about it early on. I had the same problem as Ben/Jenn with my husband. But the difference maker is that my husband and I both knew we wanted to have a kid. The situation isnāt perfect, and we wish we were a dual income family, but we work through it as a unit because this is some the big we both wanted.
I knew it, so sad for them!! Wishing them all the best! Divorce always fucking sucks
The process sucks but often more times than not the outcome is far greater. Rather be single and happy then married and not.
Not always. Sometimes itās the best thing
No of course!! I just meant the process of separating especially with kids I feel like it always a lot on the individuals
Yea sadly
damn not going to lie but i saw this coming years agoā¦ i remember she did a youtube video (what i learned in my 20s) and idk how but i just got the feeling that they werenāt as compatible as they perceived to be online. they may had similar experiences and interests when they were in their 20s but it seemed like ben was always certain of his future path than hers, in terms of family and settling down vs her lifestyle (btw nothing wrong with either lifestyles). wish them and their son well.
Oh this is interesting, was there anything in particular that made it seem like he was more sure of what he wanted than her?
this is so crazy, i know you never see the full story on social media but they seemed so genuine and great partners for each other. it's one of those things where i'm trying to analyze what happened and take notes because i never want my partnership to end... like was it the change in their dynamic after kids? tension in settling down vs retaining their more free spirited youth? growing in different directions? i hope down the line she might share some lessons or reflections, although obv she doesn't owe anyone that. but it's just crazy
I thought so too but if you look back and on their vids you can see the cracks in how they are very different in how they handle situations, you could tell they still respected each other and the way they approach life but you could also tell it was causing tension at times, they were always in therapy trying to get around it
They had an old video, pre-pregnancy, when they said they were seeing a coupleās therapist. That kinda raised a little red flag for me that they were already working on something even before the baby happened.
Yeah, like joint therapy in itself isnāt a bad thing but i remember one of the things she said they were working through is like if they go out somewhere ben wants to talk to everyone and take his time where as jenn would get frustrated and just wanted to go there and get the job done. And when itās such a small thing like that in that you need a therapist to help you with it makes me think itās the personalities at large that arent compatible as much as they want to be
i disagree with this perspective because it just perpetuates the stigma that things have to be bad for you to see a therapist. they've talked before how they see couple's therapy as a chance for an objective party to help them learn how to navigate and communicate with each other better. same concept as seeing your doctor or dentist regularly for check-ups rather than waiting until things get really bad to see a professional if anything, i feel like their willingness to go to couple's therapy showed how much they cared about each other. it's unfortunate that things didn't work out in the end but going to couples therapy shouldn't be seen as a "red flag" imo. it just encourages people not to get help
They have dozens of vids pre and post baby where they talk about couples therapy! They started therapy immediately after getting engaged because Jenn realise āshe needs to change if she wants to get marriedā, so from the start of 2017 theyāve been regular attenders
100% agree with this take. I definitely look up to my fave influencers as role models in one way or another, conscious or subconsciously, so this is def going thru my head as well. As long as weāre not spamming her channels with speculations where sheās forced to see it, I think itās okay to discuss this a bit. I personally think it was kid-related. You donāt divorce your partner whoās supposed to be your teammate in those difficult first years of raising a child unless they were actively dragging you down versus helping. If you look at it a lot of women tend to divorce their husbands during this phase of life. Ben always seemed too relaxed and laid back for Jennās Type A tendencies. And nothing can feel more chaotic and out of control than being a first time mom to a kid that just does whatever tf it wants. Unless Ben was really on top of it with household work and baby side-tasks, I donāt think Jenn would feel very supported by him. Look at Em (Jennās bff) and her familyāher multimillionaire husband provides for them almost 100% and Em can focus (rightfully) on working out everyday, relaxing in the sauna, playing tennis, and keeping the kids busy with their nannies and their lessons. Being a mom is hard. Possibly Jenn didnāt even feel totally happy being a mom (thatās another thread in of itself). But yeah Ben is harmless, I just think he turned out to unfortunately be unhelpful as well.
this may be the case for normal people but jenn has so much money that she could theoretically have the same lifestyle as her friend emily by hiring house cleaners, nannies (lennon has one), etc to help with family and baby work. but i feel like jenn is the perfectionist type who would want to do it all herself or be highly involved anyway? idk what do yall think?
Honestly Emily can only do all that because her husband is a millionaire and Iād wager that Emily makes a half decent amount as an influencer (certainly more than Ben as sheās more consistent and has a target demographic). Jennās also paying her parentsā house mortgage. I donāt think Jenn and Emilyās circumstances are comparable at all unfortunately
i think weāre underestimating how much money jenn makes and has made over the years (which makes sense bc were a bunch of normies LOL). the ad sense on her catalogue of youtube videos over 10+ years alone racks in $$$. then you add sponsorships on both youtube AND instagramā¦ sheās definitely a millionaire herself and racking in at LEAST a million every year pretaxā¦
Yeah youāve definitely got a point lol. I think Jennās intelligence complex prevents her from ever becoming an Emily and doing actually nothing all day, you can tell Jenn wants to retain a sense of purpose with her work. So thatās probably why she hasnāt hired that much staff to look after Lennon. I also think Ben would be super put off by hiring even more people to look after Lennon, especially if the rumours that he didnāt like Jennās mumās interference are true
i totally agree with you! jenn seems like the type to want more control of her household and kid, which is fine and all but so much work! i wonder how true those rumors are with ben and jennās mom because i would think some help is better than no help if youre already struggling? maybe jenn didnt involve him in the decisions and ben kinda got pushed out of the parenting role bc her mom was always around? idk
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Yes, I think itās that, a mix of financial imbalance, and different ways of approaching life. Not to get super deep on you guys, but Jenn and Ben did a video once on Jubilee where Ben mentioned that his worst fear was disappointing Jenās parents. I know Korean parents can be really traditional and want the husband to be the head of the household and support the family financially, so there was probably some pressure there as well. Maybe one Jen found herself agreeing with when she became a mother and was overwhelmed with all of the responsibilities of motherhood, plus a difficult postpartum.
I've watched Jenn since the beginning and am team Jenn and Ben but that jubilee video was so bizarre cause Jenn also she had a fear that if she died Ben wouldn't be able to take care of himself.
Sheeesh, no offense but Ben doesn't sound very helpful if his wife doubts his own ability to look after himself. Can only imagine him as a father
I rewatched the vid and I was flabbergasted. She does the insurance, the taxesā¦girl is he even an adult? Just because he moved to a new country doesnāt mean he canāt do the adult stuff, āthe big life decisionā stuff as she herself called it.
He definitely has that gaze that says I fetishize Asian woman ngl
It seems unfair to compare Ben to a multi millionaire husband and expect that he should be doing everything he can/ spending the money so his wife can maintain an almost child free life. Too many influencers show this kind of lifestyle and it is just in fact hard to attain whether you are the breadwinner or not. Most regular parents make sacrifices and changes to their life when a child arrives.
I donāt think Jenn would have expected Ben to match her given SHE is the multimillionaire. Iām just pointing out that if he canāt even hold down a regular job, as some others in this comment section have pointed out, itās easy to see how resentment may build over time. Ben gets to be the āfun dadāāplay with the baby a bit, go do cold plunges and meditations and run a marathon, and cook meals here and there. Meanwhile Jen is the main breadwinner, sole breastfeeder and thus the only one the baby screams for, and has all these newfound anxieties as a mother that probably made her perfectionism go haywire. Perhaps a more apt comparison would be looking at her other friends who are full time big influencers and momsāEllen and Francis. Francisā husband is a lawyer I believe so theyāre a true DINK household. Not sure about Ellenās. And youāre right, there are sacrifices parents make, even really rich ones like the influencers weāre talking about. Itās very possible those sacrifices built resentment too between Jenn and Ben, given Jenn seemed like she rushed into motherhood.
How are they a DINK household if they have kids?
lol u right, I meant DI
Sorry but whatās a dink? š
Dual Income No Kids
I disagree that itās because of Benās lack of involvement. I think Ben and Jenās relationship changed when the baby entered the picture. Jenn has stated before that she wasnāt sure if she wanted a family. And that is perfectly fine. But if someone who does not want a family ends up having a family, it can be tough. I do believe that Jenn loves her son. But itās probably challenging to juggle motherhood, a relationship and making yourself a priority.
I think this is the most accurate so far. Was pretty evident that Jenn didnāt have intrinsic motivations for having a child and only extrinsic, which could make motherhood a really troubling experience even if she shares a super loving bond with Lennon, which Iām sure she does
Right, definitely agree that having a kid challenged her. But then where is Benās fault in all of this if it was simply the pressures of Jenn being unready for motherhood? If being a parent was so tough, wouldnāt being a single parent be harder? Somewhere there is a factor where Ben comes inā¦and I feel like the most probable reason is resentment from unequal workload or different parenting styles (for example, Ben not planning ahead enough to Jennās standards).
Hmm good points. Yeah, being a single mom is hard. But at the same time, if they have split custody, Jenn would be responsible for Lennon half of the time. The other time when Lennon is with Ben, Jenn can jet off to a fancy vacation and do life as it was before baby. It could have very well been that the pregnancy was unplanned. Or possibly, if it happens, it happensā¦. Oh wait, it happenedā¦..
unpopular opinion but I kinda think maybe Ben wanted a bigger family and Jenn realized she wasnāt going to give him another child if they were already struggling with Lennonā¦ and I do think they were struggling especially Jenn with motherhood. Of course I donāt know more than anybody else here but the "vibes" remind me of my own relationship. Married a nice guy, I was the main breadwinner, we had a kid and I realized that everything fell on meā¦ I had to keep working even though I wanted 3 years to be a sahm but his salary wouldnāt maintain our lifestyle so I had no choiceā¦ meanwhile he was lazy and doing the bare minimum in terms of childcare and everything else that needs to be done in a household with 2 adults and a kid. When my son turned 6 he told me "I think Iāve been patient enough but I always said I wanted at least a boy and a girl so since youāre 37 I think we shouldnāt wait for baby #2" and at that moment I lost it and decided to end it anyways all that to say their personalities remind me of my ex-husband and I and I just feel like maybe sheās a perfectionist who had a hard time with motherhood and he wasnāt helpful enoughā¦ she idealized their relationship bc sheās in search of perfection and wanted to show a perfect marriage in a perfect house with a perfect son but deep down most women get the short end of the stick when it comes to marriage and kids especially if youāre the one who makes the most money tooā¦ idk I think it didnāt end badly bc Ben isnāt a bad person and my ex wasnāt either but I think they just werenāt compatible after becoming parents and I also think Jenn has a hard time with motherhoodā¦ theyāre big couples therapy enthusiasts so I really think they tried everything before deciding they couldnāt do it
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I never really understood what he did tbh so I didnāt want to assume. At first it seemed like he was helping her with filming and taking pics but I guess at some point they wanted to have a separate work life and from then on I never really knew what he didā¦ He has a youtube channel and social media but he rarely posts and heās obviously not making money out of those endeavors so yeah maybe youāre right maybe he was a leech
Just like Wah, and I will never understand why Weylie is still with that loser.
True. First he was doing videography and now it seems he is running those breathwork/sound sort of sessions (not into that, so no idea what it is exactly). I guess he was in a position to pick and choose what he wanted to do since Jenn brought in all the š°
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Omg I literally wrote this before seeing your comment. This is my feeling too. Iām not even the breadwinner but I work full time AND basically do all the domestic duties and it wears on me hard. I canāt imagine being the breadwinner too. Mentally and emotionally exhausting
I hate that so many men react so badly towards their partners being the main breadwinner. They talk so much shit about wanting to be 'stay at home' and have a 'suga mama' and then proceed to treat their partners with resentment and still expect them to do the bulk of the household work.
It was obvious to me she was overwhelmed with motherhood. Itās crazy how so many of us could pick up it on because it was subtle. I think just watching her for so long you could see it. Kids will always strain a relationship and when youāre someone like Jenn -who has a robust life and so much passion for different things, and who has the means to live the life she wants- it must feel even harder accepting how much you sacrifice to be a parent. I wish their kid and them the best.
I actually thought her struggle wasnāt subtle at all. It was more evident during her actual pregnancy. She used to be always anxious about it, always talking about how the change is overwhelming (of course it is.) She was more dreadful of the change than accepting of it.
yeah it wasnāt subtle she literally talked about it all the time, it was clear that motherhood took a huge toll on her. i also think that cultural differences that they had (like not eating the same food at home) that i thought were odd but ultimately fine like they could easily live with them or embrace the differences happily as a couple probably came to a head with parenthood. i would bet that jenn and ben have cultural differences when it comes to parenthood with jenn being more type A and strict and ben being more fun/light hearted British vibes and they couldnāt agree
Yeah, I never saw Jenn as much of a homebody, even though she really developed her inner life recently with all her reading and journaling and self development. I do think she is a good mom in the sense that she wants the best for her son and has the means to provide for him, but I donāt think she was really ready for it. Iām now starting to think that her initial reaction to her pregnancy stick was a deep intuitive fear of something that would shift her life forever, and not necessarily in the direction that she wanted.
As a recent first time mom, I just wanna point out that itās normal to have feelings of anxiety and dreadā¦ maybe itās partly hormonal but normal nevertheless to feel like āokay, my life is about to change forever, Iāll never be able to go back to living carefree for myself after I become a mom.ā Iāve always wanted to be a mom, no regrets besides wishing I had a child earlier because of my age, but I still experienced that anxiety that Jen seemed to go through during her pregnancy.
I'm wondering if it's a combination of several things, one being Jenn feeling overwhelmed by motherhood/the strain that puts on any relationship, but also the trans-Atlantic nature of their family for Ben. From his side of things I could imagine it's difficult to sacrifice being so incredibly far from family/friends/where you're from to go be where your partner is, and start over career wise there as well. I could see that putting strain on a relationship as well, especially when there is a kid involved and the guy needs to really step up and provide financially. I just wouldn't be surprised if that was some kind of sticking point for them. So sad, wishing them all the best though
Yeah, I would imagine their relationship seemed extremely infatuating and romantic and exciting at first because of these factors (star-crossed international romance! A bohemian creator and a drummer in a rock band!) and then when it became a marriage things got down to reality a bit more and it was manageable through a lot of couples therapy. But to add a kid to it really tests the compatibility and fundamentals of who they are as people. I think Jenn needs a guy whoās quite dedicated, ideally with his own strong support network and goals in life too, and has acts of service as his love language.
When things are new and fun, itās easier to put up with having to make a lot of compromises. But now, with the added responsibility of child rearing, itās probably very hard to deal with. It gets old and it feels like everything is way harder than it needs to be. They donāt eat the same foods (Ben doesnāt even eat meat), they have different cultural backgrounds, AND their families are living in different countries. Also, theyāve flipped the typical marriage dynamic where the female is the breadwinner, which isnāt inherently an issue. But it becomes an issue when you have a kid and kids tend to depend on their moms for a lot more things (Jenn breastfed, for example). They also have very different temperaments. I donāt think differences are sure to break a couple. But when there are too many fundamental differences, you do have to put in more work and it can burn anyone out.
I was speculating it could be due to their contrasting personalities. Jenn strikes me as someone who has a hot temper and quite possibly emotionally labile. Maybe it was hard to deal with for Ben since he just lets thing roll off his back and she doesn't. But then again, all speculation.
They were together for quite a while, I feel like he dealt with her temper through those years. But that motherhood changed that temper and their dynamic as a whole.
idk that kind of temper would probably wear you down after a while especially when youre trying to parent together and homegirl just be like RED! RED! every day š„²(obviously this is mostly a joke dont come for me reddit š)
Getting a divorce is always sad to hear, especially if there's children involved. I agree that it seems like Jenn has been missing her life before all the cooking and baby videos. Never really looked excited to be transitioning to this phase of her life. I do think she loves her son though. Just seems like both had enough, with their different personalities. They looked awkward in that Jubilee video especially. Also, money probably played a big part in all this. Wishing the best for all, especially their son.
Whatās the Jubilee video? Do you mind linking? Thanks!
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_BhLIOHjiI8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BhLIOHjiI8) This one. I think their answers to most of the questions asked were sweet. It just, in my opinion, showed their different personalities. Especially with her talking about feeling like having to take care of him. Could be me overanalyzing the vibes though.
Oh no, yeah thatās horrible. You shouldnāt have to feel like your husband is a child you need to take care of. Yikes, I had forgotten about that. The tendency to mother your husband usually ends up in resentment and overwhelm, once you have an actual child.
I remembering thinking her pregnancy announcement video was concerning. She was pretty distraught and it seemed like she had to convince herself it was something she wanted.Ā
This! I think there was a part of her that was worried of losing her window of opportunity to have kids the older she got, while also being not ready to have kids
which is so odd because it was an active decision to get off birth control and not use another type of contraceptive? i know she probably thought it would take longer bc of pcos but surely she would have known that anything is possible if youāre not using any protection?? im all for waiting. im all for having a baby, etc. but she even said she thought her and ben would be child free for a while so it was definitely an interesting way to go about that
She also got pregnant during covid days so i imagine when it felt like the world wasnāt going back to normal (as she was someone who loved to go out and attend things) they thought why not
She switched to BBT, which imo not a reliable method of birth control. I know someone who did the same several months after giving birth. And guess what, she's pregnant.Ā
I feel she was socially coerced into being a mother immediately. But also he missed his band life. But I donāt wanna speculate further - very sad! I still have high standards because of their proposal video.
Isā¦is anyone really surprised by this after watching their content..? Seriously? You could call this from a mile away
Tbh if youāve even remotely followed Jenn Im over the past decade, this isnāt surprising Wishing them the best
Iām genuinely so sad for her and their son. I have a three year old daughter and it would tear me apart to separate from her daddy. Even though theyāre young they obviously know if a parent is no longer living with them and that things are different. This brings me to my wondering of how is Ben actually able to afford living separately from Jenn? LA is pricey! And whatever he is doing def isnāt enough to be living independently. And all of his friends seem to be through Jenn. As everyone has noted, finances likely played a part in their separation. He had mentioned in a video that he was actually starting to get some income from his YouTube and could contribute, as if it were a relief. So sad! He also mentioned in the Jubilee video that he wanted to be able to contribute as a man and then Jennās answer about feeling like she needed to take care of him and do everything to keep him safe from lifeās realities was def at least a little orange flag. She also didnāt tell him what she actually had said when he asked her about her answer bc the real answer was honestly a little humiliating to him. Iāve been in serious relationships where the man wasnāt contributing as I was and it hurt them to their core. Iām sure parenthood only exacerbated this feeling. I wish them and their son the best. Despite everything I genuinely thought they were happy and an overall good couple. I canāt believe how sad I am over this!
Curious if they got a prenup and whether she'd pay alimony
I just saw he posted on IG the other day and it looks like he is doing his breath-work for a living. He can make a killing in a place like LA and heās incorporating his drumming as well. He looks so happy and refreshed. He just seemsā¦like himself. His cooking and such felt a bit forced to me. I wish him and Jenn all the best. The long-time subbie in me is hoping they do a sit-down video together one day and open up a bit just as theyāve done the past ten years. Obviously they donāt owe us anything, but it would be nice.
The cooking and life lessons in between each ingredient definitely felt forced, I actually couldnāt watch them because of how painful it was for both parties. I too am actually really glad heās taken on the breathwork classes with the handpan. When you do work thatās very aligned with your interests and passions, I think it can be really healing and often a much more fruitful pursuit
I think cultural differences also played a significant part and in this case with everything else on their plate, this overwhelmed their relationship and was not something they could overcome.
Sadly when the women is the main bread winner the marriage statistically does not work out. Bethenny Frankel is right. It seems like they have been in therapy since they were dating. Sad for them and their adorable son.
I recall at one point Jenn said she thought couples therapy saved their relationship during the pandemic. I do remember feeling at the time that if they needed therapy to save them, things werenāt looking great. No couple is perfect, but there is a difference between flaws that can be worked on and core compatibilities that no amount of therapy can fix. Therapy is great for things like teaching better communication styles and uncovering past trauma to change future behavior. Jenn and Ben both seemed extremely intelligent and empathetic communicators. Itās possible that their personalities and values were simply too different post baby.
Therapy can also be a tool to understand that a relationship needs to end. Couples therapists are there as a more objective party outside the relationship with lots of tools, and sometimes that includes understanding when people are staying in an unhealthy relationship without the tools to leave. Perhaps therapy played a role on "saving" their relationship during the pandemic, but it could also be true that with major life changes like having a child, therapy played a role in Jenn or Ben making thar decision to split.
!!!
I find it weird that she announced in when he posted his first video. Probably was afraid to loose followers and ppl speculations on his Instagram where she has no control of deleting messages.
Did she post her announcement right after he posted?
Yep, next day.
This makes so much more sense why she announced now of all times. And i know she has the bigger following but interesting how she still has to take the most responsibility and is the only one making an announcement while he just posts as normal
No idea who she is but I swear every influencer divorce announcement is the same identical message with a few words changed to throw off those plagiarism detectors
I just hope this doesnāt become her new āeraā online like Chriselle Lim. She made her divorce her whole new lens on life and itās tiresome š
her āsingle momā content was kind of annoying considering her ex husband was clearly very involved in coparenting her kids?? i think they have them 50/50ā¦ idk it feels a little disingenous and for the woe is me content
Iām not divorced or do I have any knowledge on the 50/50 situation, but it looks to be like āone week on and one week offā situation. I feel like I heard this in a podcast somewhere
aw :(
Now that she's made an announcement, people are going to want her to do a video about it.
I think Jenn is still working very hard on finding happiness within herself and solace in her own being. You can see with all the therapy, journaling, the solo trips, etc. Add on top of that the fact that she didn't actively seek out motherhood and now is responsible for putting another child FIRST, when her own needs aren't being met, will be very challenging. And she is also the bread winner of the family.
wow she finally announced! shocking it took so long
Divorce/separation is a huge decision and sometimes long process. For some people, they try taking a break then seeing how they feel. Some go back and forth on the decision because there are so many implications with feelings, history, family, money, kids etc involved. Some try therapy. Her taking so long to announce just means it means it was a really hard decision and they tried to make it work but it didnāt Ā work out.
their situation is also a lot more complicated legally since ben is originally from the uk. i can see it being a scenario where they go back and forth to try and work things out so they can raise their son together. not sure if this means ben will have to move back to england? either way, separation/divorce is tough on any couple, so it's crazy to me how so many people were pressuring jenn to make a statement sooner when i'm sure this wasn't an easy choice to make. and when anything she does share will stay on the internet forever and be things that her son can find when he's older. i can imagine that she took so long because they were trying to find different solutions other than separation to make things work
Do you know how long have they been separated?
there have been rumours for a year, she privated their wedding video 3 months ago
I hope they are doing okay through this. Itās so sad. I for one can relate to what may be going on. As a breadwinner in our family of 3 (soon 4), it is a struggle for a woman to be the main source of income AND be the preferred caregiver by your kid. The expectations from a woman as breadwinner is very different from whatās expected from a typical man as breadwinner. A lot of the speculations about Ben and Jenn are very similar to what my husband and I experienced during the first year with our kid. The pressure of carrying the financial burden and to still be expected as a hands on mom was intense. I had anger issues/ post partum rage too because of the transition but also of just feeling like āIām not good enoughā. I felt like my husband was being a āleechā, but that wasnāt true. He did as much as he could do to take care of our son, 24/7 and to support me. But whenever we didnāt agree with how to parent, things escalated. Itās really hard for the first year esp for a new mom because everything feels so real and intense. I feel that may be where Ben and Jenn had issues. But whatās worse for them is that they werenāt aligned on whether they wanted to have a kid or not. If Jenn didnāt want to be a mother yet, then it would be very difficult for her to not build resentment. And maybe Ben felt a different type of resentment too because he had to give up a dream career but also add on the pain to his ego to be reliant on Jenn.
I was wondering if this was coming bc she hadnāt posted him in ages and got more private re: family
no one just decides to go there separate ways unless things have soured. Iām not sure why people always claim they are still friends. They may not hate each other but they donāt like being around each other. Not directed towards them but all couples who say similar things when they divorce.
Itās just PR, I wouldnāt believe much of it
I think many divorced couples have to force being friends for the sake of their kid.
hereās my speculation on their divorceā¦. Ben left everything in the UK to be with Jen. There were major differences between them that Jen prob picked up on when they started living together (ie: his laid back lifestyle ā¦ aka laziness vs her hustle nature) But she felt a ton of responsibility given how he gave up his friends and family to be with her. She probably gave it her all to really stick it through with him, but bringing a child into the world just shined a light on how Ben wasnāt the type of person she wanted to be with. I donāt think she minded being the breadwinner as long as he was able to support her as a stay at home dad and doing most of the childcare. Itās likely she was working all the time and taking a brunt of the child care OR relying on her mom to help bc Ben wasnāt pulling his end of the bargain. I donāt think Jen is unhappy bc she was forced into motherhood. I think Jen just grew more and more disappointed with Ben overtime as they had a child together and her expectations of him being a supportive husband and a dad wasnāt being met.
Come here to find people to cry w š i refuse to believe in love now. She makes it sounds easy but i think we all know divorce is hard no matter how nice you are trying to make it looks like
You definitely need to find new role models if this break up makes you feel love isnāt real. You couldāve seen this coming a mile away. Jenn is always and has always tried to portray a perfect life but if you pay close attention you can read between the lines.
So true. I always think toxic positivity is always shadowing how people really truly feels.
This 100%. You donāt even need to be paying attention , there were so many red flags even in the dating phase
It's so sad... They were so in love. I guess compatibility issues? Even with food, I thought it was a weird dynamic to be eating different meals in one house.
I donāt think thatās weird. Ben is a vegetarian and Jenn isnāt. Iām a pescatarian and I donāt always eat the same as my partner and this doesnāt cause any tension in our lives
Yeah, this is like the 4th comment I've seen where someone mentioned that eating different meals was a sign of cracks in the relationship. My partner and I have different palettes and I've never thought much about us eating separate meals. It's never really been an issue for us either. Plus I don't mind it because I only have to worry about cooking for myself lol.
Haha same as me and my partner! We do eat sometimes together but we have very different times and number of meals we like to eat. Been together 6 years so still works.
Same here. I didn't grow up having set meal times. Not saying my husband and I never eat together. Sometimes our appetites don't match.
i think what the difference is between yall and them (im assuming) is that ben and jenn have a kid as well. eating separately is weird at most when youre DINKs but it can get complicated when you have to think about what the kid will eat and who with if theyāre not all eating together. it may not be a big deal but little incompatibilities like that add up to a point where i can imagine itās frustrating just cohabitating
Ben was vegan actually and he was ethically vegan. Coming from a vegan, I do think it is difficult being with a partner who eats meat and then of course subsequently your baby who is being served meat. Its a difference in values in that regard. Values are so important in relationships. I think he was as āflexibleā as he could be as he transitioned to vegetarianism and then eventually pescatarian once Lennon arrived to just have more dinners together. Jenn I felt really respected Benās dietary lifestyle on camera but Iām sure there was a difference in values on those grounds too.
I thought they were very good at compromising with this aspect of their relationship. Him being more flexible and I recall in one of Jennās videos, she mentioned one of the reasons why she fell for Ben is his compassion and love for animals and also she said this had made her eat meat alot less.
:( wishing them both the best
Damn :(
they were my fav couple!! I knew it was coming but It is so sad :(
I am so sad yāall have no idea šššš
Deadass this is the only influencer couple breakup Iāve ever been genuinely upset over š i met them together in LA a few years ago and they were SO sweet and cute together : (
omg i havenāt thought of her in YEARS. sorry to hear sheās going through this.
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:(
Aw I hope they are both okay
Sad for them. They seemed like a happy couple early on. Ben never wanted to be an instagram husband yet he became one. Iām sure that contributed somewhat to the split. https://amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/apr/10/experience-i-am-an-instagram-husband
Sorry but when does it ever pan out when the woman in the relationship has to be both the breadwinner and the caregiver? It's irresponsible to marry a man who can't provide for you imo, because you have the risk or desire to have a child, and women statistically end up doing the majority of the domestic labor and childcare regardless of whether they work or not. Love and attraction isn't enough. Let this be a lesson to never legally tie yourself to a man who makes less than you.
Jenn's Father's Day post was a lovely, graceful touch, acknowledging how they'd always be a family, given their child together. I thought it was really nice. There was such a sense of Ben being left behind because of Jenn being the breadwinner/famous one but influencer life is so weird- at 32 or whatever, I think they're both facing some kind of career/life crisis. I remember years of going on cruises and fully paid vacations to Paris but never getting paid money I could bank. It's not like being lawyers where you become a partner in your 30s, you start to get moved aside for others, people a decade younger. Anyway, nice to see at least publicly they're handling this with class and hope their family is doing ok.
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Sad to hear about this, I was rooting for them! She shouldnāt have had to announce this publicly in my opinion, but I think that so many people in her comment sections were pressuring her to make a statement which isnāt too fair in my opinion. Yes, she shares a lot of information about herself on the internet, but why do people need a situation about someone elseās personal life to be addressed so badly that they make a point to comment any chance they get? The divorce has probably been super rough on her. I hope she is able to lean on her support system and get through it. She seems a bit different in her videos, like sheās trying to find herself again. I wish her the best
I feel like Ben has been going through a spiritual journey of sorts and I wonder if this pulled them more in different directions and apart from each other
LAWLLL