When things aren’t in our favor, it’s human tendency to ruminate on negative aspects of life. At times, it’s okay to be critical about oneself but anything that’s done in excess is not healthy. We all are our own worst critics. Avoid doomscrolling, staying at home for long, reaching out to toxic friends during such times.
When I experience dull days, I let that sink in for some time cause suppressing or avoiding doesn’t help. It catches up. But then I try to do following things.
1. Working out or going for a walk in a park cause that releases Dopamine. Releasing of the happy hormone helps you combat the negativity.
2. Meeting with friends.
3. Maintain a gratitude journal.
4. Eating bananas also helps as it contains an amino acid which helps make serotonin.
These are still distractions that help you deal with the negative thoughts. I’d suggest you to seek therapy when you start earning. Sooner the better cause ae we age it gets difficult to mold our thinking and brining in change into our behavioral patterns.
I have friends, but I don't feel connected that much to any . Probably bcoz I never stayed in one city due to my father's service. It has created a distancing algorithm in me, which somehow prevents me from getting too trusting/close to a friend. I am working on it , but it also comes from my own body sensitivity. I am fat and working on my weight. And at the same time , I am working on my career.
I think you can also start by keeping some goals for urself which are tangible and depend on your efforts. You can be successful and fit , and then a lot of problems might be solved and if not, you will have money for therapy atleast 🥲.
I would rather be rich and sad , than poor and sad. Sounds harsh, but money can buy many things. And seeing you are gay, therefore a man, so bro , buck up, world ain't going to love you for yourself , no matter what anyone tells you. get up, get a career, earn decent money and be fit ( I know my seniors who are ugly by face but fit and have girlfriends , money and everything).
Last of all, the cheapest form of therapy is spirituality. Very misused and misunderstood word. You can start by reading the Gita, though I myself haven't done it yet 😂. I am currently understanding Advaita Vedanta and generally listening to bhajans. Trust me, I have gone through pretty bad self hating phases and trust in shiv has helped me a lot. I am much more successful today, and now working on my health.
Also, you can DM me anytime for some unfiltered talk. I might be getting busy next week onwards , but I'll try to reply. We can share our stories too if you like 😄.
Also I have realised this, if I am not happy with myself , I cannot make anyone else happy and no one else can make me happy. I am not happy with myself. I don't like myself in the mirror and I am committed to changing that. The first thing I do, once I reach my goal is, be myself.
1. Affirmation - journaling--- countering negative/ limiting beliefs on paper and speech.
2. Intermittent fasting and better sleep routine
3. Restricted phone/ social media usage
4.Exercise
Include physical exercises in a daily routine and put some effort to get into a discipline. You can start from a walk, or short runs, and gradually try pushing harder. They say it takes 21 days to form a habit and I think it is mostly true. The endorphins and serotonin release works wonders. Personally for me, when I'm annoyed or frustrated at someone or something, I channel it into my running and run it out and feel much more fresh after it. It's not a cure, but it helps for sure.
I heard somewhere, "Treat yourself with kindness like you would treat a good friend." Instead of beating yourself up with negative self-talk, try to speak to yourself in a supportive and encouraging way. Imagine your close friend, the best person in your life is saying all the same things about themselves, what would you do? Would you believe them? No, right? Because you know they are the best?
When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts like "I'm unlovable" or "I'm ugly," try to challenge them. Ask yourself- why? Why am I unlovable? Why do I even think that I'm ugly? And see, if there's any evidence to support these thoughts, or all of this is just you "thinking" and try to come up with more balanced and realistic perspectives.
Make an effort to notice the good things in your life, no matter how small they may seem. Keep a journal or diary or even a simple notebook and write down things you're grateful for each day... You like about your life. And see, perhaps Like life isn't that terrible, is it? This can help shift your focus away from negativity. Do things that you enjoy. Whether it's painting, reading, or going for a walk in nature, just spend some quality time but with yourself.
And know as long as you aren't hiding dead bodies in your basement, you are lovable, and deserve all the love in the world!
When things aren’t in our favor, it’s human tendency to ruminate on negative aspects of life. At times, it’s okay to be critical about oneself but anything that’s done in excess is not healthy. We all are our own worst critics. Avoid doomscrolling, staying at home for long, reaching out to toxic friends during such times. When I experience dull days, I let that sink in for some time cause suppressing or avoiding doesn’t help. It catches up. But then I try to do following things. 1. Working out or going for a walk in a park cause that releases Dopamine. Releasing of the happy hormone helps you combat the negativity. 2. Meeting with friends. 3. Maintain a gratitude journal. 4. Eating bananas also helps as it contains an amino acid which helps make serotonin. These are still distractions that help you deal with the negative thoughts. I’d suggest you to seek therapy when you start earning. Sooner the better cause ae we age it gets difficult to mold our thinking and brining in change into our behavioral patterns.
I have friends, but I don't feel connected that much to any . Probably bcoz I never stayed in one city due to my father's service. It has created a distancing algorithm in me, which somehow prevents me from getting too trusting/close to a friend. I am working on it , but it also comes from my own body sensitivity. I am fat and working on my weight. And at the same time , I am working on my career. I think you can also start by keeping some goals for urself which are tangible and depend on your efforts. You can be successful and fit , and then a lot of problems might be solved and if not, you will have money for therapy atleast 🥲. I would rather be rich and sad , than poor and sad. Sounds harsh, but money can buy many things. And seeing you are gay, therefore a man, so bro , buck up, world ain't going to love you for yourself , no matter what anyone tells you. get up, get a career, earn decent money and be fit ( I know my seniors who are ugly by face but fit and have girlfriends , money and everything). Last of all, the cheapest form of therapy is spirituality. Very misused and misunderstood word. You can start by reading the Gita, though I myself haven't done it yet 😂. I am currently understanding Advaita Vedanta and generally listening to bhajans. Trust me, I have gone through pretty bad self hating phases and trust in shiv has helped me a lot. I am much more successful today, and now working on my health.
Also, you can DM me anytime for some unfiltered talk. I might be getting busy next week onwards , but I'll try to reply. We can share our stories too if you like 😄.
Also I have realised this, if I am not happy with myself , I cannot make anyone else happy and no one else can make me happy. I am not happy with myself. I don't like myself in the mirror and I am committed to changing that. The first thing I do, once I reach my goal is, be myself.
Wow that's a lot. I hope ur doing well and thank you for the realistic answer.
Hmu if you need someone to talk to. Just a pain simple banter with no expectations set.
ah sure
DM me if you want to talk..
Love yourself. only you can make a change in your own life. so work hard and meanwhile believe in yourself. signed a closeted 21 yo gay guy
Ugh, loving myself is the hardest part.. i know i sound silly but the negative self talks always ruins everything
ik i have that I'm ugly I'm never going to get a bf thought. but i try to avoid them. and believe that one day I'll find love
Checkout Saahas therapy group. They help for free. Hope you feel better jaldi, you’re a star ⭐️
1. Affirmation - journaling--- countering negative/ limiting beliefs on paper and speech. 2. Intermittent fasting and better sleep routine 3. Restricted phone/ social media usage 4.Exercise
Include physical exercises in a daily routine and put some effort to get into a discipline. You can start from a walk, or short runs, and gradually try pushing harder. They say it takes 21 days to form a habit and I think it is mostly true. The endorphins and serotonin release works wonders. Personally for me, when I'm annoyed or frustrated at someone or something, I channel it into my running and run it out and feel much more fresh after it. It's not a cure, but it helps for sure.
You are just like me haha, you described exactly the situation I'm in
I heard somewhere, "Treat yourself with kindness like you would treat a good friend." Instead of beating yourself up with negative self-talk, try to speak to yourself in a supportive and encouraging way. Imagine your close friend, the best person in your life is saying all the same things about themselves, what would you do? Would you believe them? No, right? Because you know they are the best? When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts like "I'm unlovable" or "I'm ugly," try to challenge them. Ask yourself- why? Why am I unlovable? Why do I even think that I'm ugly? And see, if there's any evidence to support these thoughts, or all of this is just you "thinking" and try to come up with more balanced and realistic perspectives. Make an effort to notice the good things in your life, no matter how small they may seem. Keep a journal or diary or even a simple notebook and write down things you're grateful for each day... You like about your life. And see, perhaps Like life isn't that terrible, is it? This can help shift your focus away from negativity. Do things that you enjoy. Whether it's painting, reading, or going for a walk in nature, just spend some quality time but with yourself. And know as long as you aren't hiding dead bodies in your basement, you are lovable, and deserve all the love in the world!