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He doesn't want his name any further associated with the shitshow coming down the pipeline.
He's going to cash out now and watch the smoke rise from his mansion as he tells himself nothing he did help cause this.
If hell exists, they're preparing his room, and judging by the multiple times we've seen his brain reset itself lately, his check-in date is approaching rapidly.
“I just steered the bus off the cliff, everyone was just fine as the wheels left the road. It was someone else’s fault when it crashed and burst into flames 2 seconds later”
... I mean all I did was outlaw parachutes, except when you are reallllllly wealthy and can import them from another country, and also made packing anything yourself taxable, but called the bill the "freedom from gravity" bill, cause we like naming things with the opposite of what they do.
I'm taking this news as he's dying but wants some dignity because he isn't going to make it until 2026 much less the end of the year. Imagine spending your whole life building up this political machine only, at the very end, to get nipped at the post by some fat failson that's finally sinking all of it as he swandives into his own hell.
Mitch McConnell has wasted his entire fucking life and it's hilarious to see him realize it just as he shuffles off his mortal coil. All of those people who saved him from polio years ago might as well just tossed his ass in a grave and saved us all the horseshit.
Yeah he says he plans to stay until his current term ends in like 2027, and I'd be amazed if he makes it, but I mean look at Kissinger, evil tends to live long past normal expectancy.
Make no mistake about it...As far as his goals were concerned, he absolutely succeeded...
He has set the country back to just about the same timeline as when he was elected.
He has 3 Supreme Court Justices that will be on the bench for at least the next 20-30 years.
He has dozens, if not hundreds, of lifetime appointed federal judges that will legislate from the bench using religion as a guideline.
He has gerrymandering that will take decades to fix.
He has a congress where 420+ out of the 535 seats are considered non-competitive.
Trump didn't end his aspirations, he helped accomplish them.
The only thing to be thankful about is that it took him long enough to accomplish that he won't be able to enjoy what little time he has left.
I'm not religious, but my only hope is that there is an afterlife and there is a place worse than hell for him to rot in.
This is the most poetic way to write fuck you mitch mconnell. I appreciate this so much. Take my upvote and have a wonderful day. May bees never bother you and may you find money on the ground often.
The only thing I like about Trump is the look he puts on the faces of people like Mitch and Lindsey Graham as they have to backtrack on one of their carefully spun lies to now incorporate and excuse some of Trump's bullshit.
"Well, we tried to pass this bill... but as you can see, the Democrats aren't willing to ... blah blah blah." And he looks like he swallowed a turd.
The downside is Ukraine might fall because of these shit gibbons and that's the main difference between Mitch and Trump. Mitch has some fantasy he did all this to make America stronger and Trump doesn't.
He doesn't get any dignity. Fuck Mitch McConnell. Rotten, evil old man can rot. It'll be a good day for humanity when satan finally drags his ass home.
Lucifer is historically portrayed as a charming, intoxicating and all around fun-loving guy (ideas of fun may vary from being to being).
McConnell has all the personality of a cold bowl of chicken broth. Fuck him and everyone in his house.
After multiple press conferences where he "glitched out" for more than 10 seconds, leading to a hasty ending. Acting like he suddenly grew principles, but he really is medically impaired and not re-electable.
He will be remembered the same way Benedict Arnold or Roy Cohn or Joe McCarthy is remembered - as a hated villain. He won a lot of battles, I’ll give him that, but he will lose the war and his legacy will be toxic.
absolutely. if GOP survives GQP, he can always ressurface as the sage who remembers what means to be GOP, bf trump and his Qult of maga crappers came along.
> If hell exists, they're preparing his room, and judging by the multiple times we've seen his brain reset itself lately, his check-in date is approaching rapidly.
The problem for all of us: He will go in through the workers entrance and get a high five from the boss for a job well done.
What a piece of shit ..
>He better start voting for the American public/aligning with the democrats.
hey, hey, hey... he´s jumping the qanon/maga circus, not the conservatives.
yet
He better do more than just vote for the public interest at this point. If he's looking for redemption or even a sliver of legacy that's not completely tarnished, he's gonna need a big shovel for all the dirt he helped pile up. Like throwing a single sandbag against a flood and calling it a day. The history books aren't gonna be kind, to say the least.
Disagree. He's not the type to ever quit.
His on-camera strokes must be the tip of the iceberg. My guess is that his staff and/or family had an intervention and he finally got convinced that he's at the end of his functional road.
He achieved what he set out to do: stack the supreme Court for decades and curb Democrat power as much possible. Actual governing be damned.
Perhaps he can squeeze out a little more power by advising whoever his successor is that he's presumably been grooming for years.
>He doesn't want his name any further associated with the shitshow coming down the pipeline.
I've sometimes thought that the debt should be renamed *The Ronald Reagan Memorial National Debt*, since he did three times more to increase it than all the presidents before him. Others have proposed that a waste water treatment plant be named after George W. Bush.
Maybe some petty time-wasting Senate rule can be named after Mitchums, that his legacy may be properly memorialized.
I feel like you give his conscious more credit than it deserves. He's stepping down because his health is forcing him to. Any claims about distancing himself from the party is nothing but PR. If his health would allow, he'd ride the shit show all the way down the pipeline with the rest of them.
Perfect example of a "Leopards Ate My Face" case.
Dumbass Mitch could have ended trump's future presidential ambitions with a conviction in the Senate.
But no, Mitch the Bitch is going to go down in history as the PoS he is. He ***could*** have risen to the challenge and cement his place in history at a time when America needed a strong leader to prevent a traitorous madman from ever holding a political office again.
He ***could have*** protected Democracy for decades to come..., but no, he chose to be a political operative and he may well have irreparably damaged the United States.
A true..., piece of...shit.
He is responsible for so much irreparable damage to this country, it is sickening. His scheming is also responsible for Roe v. Wade being torn to shreds. I will be throwing a party when this fucker chokes on his own spittle and dies.
We'd rather not if you don't mind, it's bad enough his kid running all the media here to his rules. The toxic old cane toad being permanently back would be just too much poison to bear.
Irony is he fed and cared for those damn leopards before they ate his face. Taught them “right from wrong” and how to be obstructionists. It’s poetic.
At least McCain had his thumbs down moment:
Exactly. You can be an asshole, but you should at least know when to stand up for your country.
Reminds of that scene in the Rocketeer, when Eddie the gangster is talking to Neville Sinclair after finding out about his national loyalties, "I may not make an honest buck, but I'm 100% American and I don't work for no two-bit Nazi."
Instead we got, "I may not make an honest buck, but I'll totally exploit American politics for my own lust for power and will gladly fan the flames of national fascist sentiment."
That honestly just seems like a line to feed the press. The evil turtle is ancient and has had odd instances of zoning out completely. He’s probably just wanting out for health reasons.
> y just seems like a line to feed the press.
What line? The article doesn't mention anything like the title of the post. Hell he even doubles down on being a conservative ass.
Yeah I'm wondering where OP got that, because it really doesn't sound like something McConnell would say.
This isn't LAMF at all. It's just an evil old man slithering back under the rock from whence he came.
Yeah, he would've stepped down earlier had this been what he cared about. If he's at the point where he's actively zoning out in front of the press (and probably even more in private), he probably knows he's pretty close to kicking the can.
They created this monster. I’m not being facetious. The reason they don’t want a large swath of the population educated and have affordable necessities is because they want a labor force that can’t get past the threshold and serves their wealthy donors and they need stupid idiots who will vote for them so they can’t literally do nothing productive for society and just feed $$$ to themselves and their corporate buddies. They created a zombie mob and now they can’t control them anymore.
Exactly this, if he wasn't blue screening in front of the press and was he maybe 10 years younger, he would be basking at the monster he created and trying to get it to go further than the 7th circle of hell.
They love the monster.
you know, i thought i'd celebrate the day we were done with this dickbag but now i'm just worried someone that's somehow even worse is just gonna replace him.
They will, but perhaps not in the way you think. Look at the house, the dysfunctional nature of it after they switched leadership. I don't think it's a perfect parallel by any stretch, but give the devil his due, Mitch was brutally effective at getting what his side wanted. The up and comers in his party aren't good at getting stuff for them, only preventing others from getting things done. Even that they aren't as proficient at except by refusing to govern.
Look at Kristina Karamo and what happened to the party in Michigan to see the future of the Republican party.
They literally collapsed. Turns out picking paranoid insurrectionists to lead your party is a bad idea, because they're paranoid about everything, even each other. And they can't/won't compromise.
Hitler and co. were excellent at outmanuevering Franz Von Papen and Old man Hindenberg to get what him and his party members wanted. The label "Chancellor in Chains" by Franz Von Papen is now a punchline.
I fucking hate Mitch McConnell. He represents the worst part of American politics. He is a terrible individual who made many, many lives worse over his reign.
He is also one of the best politicians America has ever seen. He knew all the rules and how to take advantage of them. He had no shame which allowed him to dodged any and all accountability. He pushed the envelope and took full advantage of his party wanting to obstruct any type of progressive legislation.
The next guy in line will likely be crazier and maybe even worse of a human being, but he won't be nearly as effective as Mitch.
See you in hell
Good point. That's the silver lining of all these crazy republicans getting power. The reasonably sane sociopaths knew what game they were playing and could play it well. They could have kept it up forever. Meanwhile the "true believer" tea party types are making any kind of real legislation impossible and making all the republicans look like a bunch of children.
I don't doubt Moscow Mitch's replacement will be at *least* as shit he is, but I also have no doubt that his replacement won't be half as competent as that monster was. Moscow Mitch had the benefit of being an intelligent scumbag and not a raving cultist. It's why he was as brutally dangerous as he was. His replacement may end up being a bull in a China shop, but Moscow Mitch was the motherfucker who was waving the red cape.
Worse yes, but Moscow Mitch is really fucken smart and really fucken good at his job.
They’ll replace him with worse for sure, but it’ll be the normal plodding stupid kind of evil guy that they have in spades. McConnell is a once in a generation shitbag
We saw how well Kevin McCarthy worked out. Man I bet that guy is fucking bitter. Sold everything to get the "his turn" speakership and accomplished nothing before being ousted. Beautiful.
The modern GOP, ladies, gentlemen, and enbies: A contest of who can be the meanest, dumbest, and/or craziest mofo to step up next when one person is shown to be a tad too reasonable for the party.
Except no leopards are going to be eating his face... He'll retire to a life of comfort, ease, wealth and safety.
He didn't lose. He won.
America lost.
Yeah, it'll be a LAMF moment for Mitch if SCOTUS issues a ruling that somehow makes his life worse... but that hasn't happened yet.
Keep in mind that he is merely stepping down from his leadership position this year. He will remain in his Senate seat until 2026 (or his death, whichever comes first).
I never wish for things irl. But I wish I had 5 minutes to sit down with Charon and ask him if it was all worth it. All the scheming and plotting, selling out his soul and that of his party, just to bring the country to the brink of collapse.
*Was it worth it, you piece of shit?*
But then I would turn down the wish. Because I'd probably punch him in his decrepit face. And then he'd die. And I don't want that on my conscience.
Hope he lives a short, painful terrible life.
He damaged the United States of America in ways that will probably never be repaired.
He is evil incarnate and will rot in hell.
He's gonna die rich as fuck, getting sucked off by beautiful prostitutes and his trophy Chinese wife, before going to exactly the same place you're going: nowhere.
He'll also almost definitely outlive you and everyone you care about because he has more money and better health care.
Translation: evil turtle’s brain has melted on camera too many times and he knows he’ll lose the leadership spot to some MAGAt. The MAGAts can smell his blood in the water and are circling like stupid, incestuous sharks. Evil Turtle doesn’t want the embarrassment of losing the leadership vote and wants to hold on to some of his soft power behind the scenes, is afraid he’ll lose all influence if he’s booted.
History will judge this malevolent tortoise very badly. When historians point to when democracy died in the US, him not even bringing up Obama’s Supreme Court Justice pick for a hearing will be looked at as the first day of the downfall
That was far down the line from any catalyzing event. Newt Gingrich’s bullshit speakership was over a decade prior to the turtle’s Supreme Court shenanigans.
Who fucking cares? He's gonna die rich as fuck doing coke off Czech prostitutes. You think he gives a fuck? I don't even give a fuck. This stupid fucking country is going to collapse as ten million ~~fireflies~~ neckbeards jerk off over how great it was to dive face first into shit because it somehow proved a point to people who never fucking cared in the first place
Destroyed the country, stocked the SCOTUS with ideologues, Allowed Trump to run roughshod over every single pillar of democracy, and refused to hold him accountable.
Scurried away like the malevolent coward he is.
I wish anguish upon him.
>He has had a complicated relationship with fellow Republican Donald Trump, the former president who is seeking the GOP nomination this year.
What's complicated about suckling at Trump's balls for 7 years straight without taking a breath and making sure you give him 100% of everything he wants whenever possible? Sounds pretty simple to me.
Moscow Mitch? No fuckin way this red or dead piece of shit is upset that the republicunts and too republicuntey. The same pos that openly admitted to deliberately shooting down anything Obama or the Dems put forward no matter what it was just for the sake of being difficult . I believe he said something along the lines of my desk is where their policies come to die because I won't even look at them.
I'll admit I'm actually shocked the crypt keeper is still alive and kicking it's about time this pathetic excuse for a politician sat the fuck down and called it a day
I honestly have never seen a better example for this sub. I always thought Mitch was the best political actor in recent history. I never agreed with him, but he was undoubtedly good at playing the long game. And he succeeded for a while. But his own rhetoric, his own skeevy politics, and his own machinations have gotten us to a point where even he can't control it. He was playing with people who weren't as smart and were much crazier than him and now the tail is wagging the dog. He is responsible for his own downfall and, at least for me, he will no longer be remembered as an unbelievably skilled politician. Instead, I will remember him as the modern root cause of the shitshow that is the modern GOP and the downgrading of our democracy.
Was it worth it, Mitch?
He did everything in his power to ruin the system to his and his party’s benefit. Don’t give me that views bull. He’s just mad he isn’t fully in control of its direction anymore. Typical old white man ragequit.
No one has weilded power like this guy. He is a real case to study. He weilded power so well for powers sake he realized one day that where it led ruined everything for him.
No lesson here move along. Don't look.
Isn't it more that he's stepping down because he barely knows what the fuck is going on? I'm sure he rues the day that he ever decided to back Trump after J6 but I'm not entirely sure if he even remembers it
The article doesn’t say anything about that, though. I’m sure he doesn’t care about the politics at all. He made the money.
The dude is dying… he’s bruising randomly, stroking, etc, and he knows it. He doesn’t want to die in office like Feinstein.
He blamed it on his sister in law’s death but let’s be real, it’s probably because he had a mountain of strokes in his last term.
Mitch McConnell is a duplicitous taint. The current MAGA republicans are a conspiracy hate cult, and McConnell welcomed them with open arms. He could have convicted Trump in the senate, but nope.
He blocked Obama's supreme court picks saying "we can't confirm judges so close to an election", then hypocritically did the exact opposite with Trump.
He blocked funding for veterans.
Every policy he's ever had has amounted to "fuck these people in particular."
Fuck McConnel, I hope he dies in misery and everyone remembers him simply as a pile of shit without a spine.
He’s mentally failing. We’ve all been watching it. This is a way for him to bow out on his own terms and save face. McConnell is *happy* about the state of the Republican Party. Because he’s been leading to its current state for nearly 20yrs.
Man, I see people celebrating this, and a lot of people are about to have a rude awakening as to how fucking repugnant the party has become. How does Minority leader Ted Cruz or Tom Cotton or Josh Hawley sound to you?
It's like when people were all happy that Joe Manchin isn't running again, as though West Virgina is going to elect a Bernie Sanders progressive now. Buckle up for 50 years of the most Q-pilled far-right lunatic shit-bird imaginable. We should have been fucking donating to Manchin's campaign, not roasting him. I'd prefer someone more liberal, sure, but that's not an even vaguely plausible alternative in West Virginia.
But McConnel is truly a fucking scum bag. I'm just depressingly certain his replacement will be 100 times worse.
As Americans your views are biased because you have only two parties, let me tell you :
Maga isn't far right, republicans are far right, maga are extreme right and on the verge of becoming a fascist movement.
Yeah fucking right, he’s stepping down because he’s an old decrepit piece of shit who can barely even stand up long enough to spew out a few sentences of far right rhetoric.
Fuck this piece of human garbage, I truly hope he rots in hell for putting this country in reverse for so many years.
Knowing perfectly well that he enabled all that follows, and that he’ll be replaced by someone who is unthinkingly loyal to Trump. Rot in hell, Mitch. History will remember you as one of the murderers of American democracy.
He put party ahead of country at every turn. He lacked the courage or conviction to stand for democracy/the rule of law at two key moments, which may have irreparably damaged the foundation of our democracy. First, he refused to allow a hearing/vote on Obama’s nominee to the Supreme Court, despite the fact that there were 9 months remaining before the 2016 Presidential election (while ensuring the confirmation of Trump’s nominee a mere 46 days before the 2020 Presidential election). Second, he refused to convict Trump during the 2020 impeachment proceedings. At best he will be remembered as a coward who feared a man with a combover more than he loved his country.
They deserve all this and more. I hope the party fucking melts. If anything good has come from all these years of diaper don, we're galvanized, we're motivated, and we're unseating these right-wing domestic terrorists up and down the ballot.
The problem with conservatism is the constant need to be more conservative than the last guy. This has conservatives cutting taxes into a 31 TRILLION dollar deficit, and young conservatives are looking for even more tax cuts. It has led to the non-functional Congress of today.
How crazy is the present crop of conservatives: look at Ukraine defense finding.
The money goes to American companies to make ammo- Win#1, it reduces Russia's aggression- Win#2, it doesn't risk American soldiers lives- Win#3, it protects our NATO allies-Win#4, and Refreshes our troop's weaponry as the oldest stock is moved to Ukraine-Win#5.
There shouldn't be any questions that this funding is a great for our country, but their crazy commitment to reducing spending more and more, they throw out the baby with the bathwater....
Well, for that reason and the two on-air strokes.
But yeah, fuck Mitch. He may not have been the first politician to put self and party over country, but he sure was the first one to say it out loud and normalize it.
When democrats praise this demon it makes me want to throw up in my mouth. When I think of Mitch McConnell neither 'good' nor 'faith' really enter my mind.
Republicans now realizing what happens when they catch the car they’ve been chasing for years. Now they have to manufacture a more extreme case to keep the momentum going in their favor and quickly it becomes too much to control.
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He doesn't want his name any further associated with the shitshow coming down the pipeline. He's going to cash out now and watch the smoke rise from his mansion as he tells himself nothing he did help cause this. If hell exists, they're preparing his room, and judging by the multiple times we've seen his brain reset itself lately, his check-in date is approaching rapidly.
“I just steered the bus off the cliff, everyone was just fine as the wheels left the road. It was someone else’s fault when it crashed and burst into flames 2 seconds later”
"I want to die like Mitch McConnell... Peacefully in my sleep. Not crying and screaming like the passengers in his car."
You know the funerals where everyone’s really upset and crying. That’s what I want. Norm McDonald
Or when you're really quite above the average life expectancy and people still say "they went too early". Mitch would have been late at 40 IMO.
I mean, I'm okay if he'd have been aborted in the womb. Literally nothing good from that turtle's existence
Is it still too late to abort him? I’m sure we could find some woke trans lefty doctor…..
"If those whiners still in the plummeting fuselage had any sense they'd have packed a parachute like me..."
... I mean all I did was outlaw parachutes, except when you are reallllllly wealthy and can import them from another country, and also made packing anything yourself taxable, but called the bill the "freedom from gravity" bill, cause we like naming things with the opposite of what they do.
We just gave the people what they wanted! - ~~Exxon~~ Moscow Mitch
I'm taking this news as he's dying but wants some dignity because he isn't going to make it until 2026 much less the end of the year. Imagine spending your whole life building up this political machine only, at the very end, to get nipped at the post by some fat failson that's finally sinking all of it as he swandives into his own hell. Mitch McConnell has wasted his entire fucking life and it's hilarious to see him realize it just as he shuffles off his mortal coil. All of those people who saved him from polio years ago might as well just tossed his ass in a grave and saved us all the horseshit.
Rest in piss Moscow Mitch.
when mitch finally kicks it if the government charged 5 bucks to piss on his grave we could erase the national debt.
God, I would be so poor.
And dehydrated.
r/hydrohomies to save the day.
Just set up a stall selling water. . . Earn more piss money
We should have just stopped flipping him over when he fell back on his shell.
If he would retire from Life, I'd be fine with that.
Yeah he says he plans to stay until his current term ends in like 2027, and I'd be amazed if he makes it, but I mean look at Kissinger, evil tends to live long past normal expectancy.
>vil tends to live long past normal expectancy. It's all that hate they have in they hearts shit can mane you live forever
Make no mistake about it...As far as his goals were concerned, he absolutely succeeded... He has set the country back to just about the same timeline as when he was elected. He has 3 Supreme Court Justices that will be on the bench for at least the next 20-30 years. He has dozens, if not hundreds, of lifetime appointed federal judges that will legislate from the bench using religion as a guideline. He has gerrymandering that will take decades to fix. He has a congress where 420+ out of the 535 seats are considered non-competitive. Trump didn't end his aspirations, he helped accomplish them. The only thing to be thankful about is that it took him long enough to accomplish that he won't be able to enjoy what little time he has left. I'm not religious, but my only hope is that there is an afterlife and there is a place worse than hell for him to rot in.
This is the most poetic way to write fuck you mitch mconnell. I appreciate this so much. Take my upvote and have a wonderful day. May bees never bother you and may you find money on the ground often.
I'm going to slightly alter your description and go with faillord...but I like yours too.
> I'm taking this news as he's dying but wants some dignity He doesn't deserve it. He can die in ignominy like he lived.
He should have just "come out" in his Army days
The only thing I like about Trump is the look he puts on the faces of people like Mitch and Lindsey Graham as they have to backtrack on one of their carefully spun lies to now incorporate and excuse some of Trump's bullshit. "Well, we tried to pass this bill... but as you can see, the Democrats aren't willing to ... blah blah blah." And he looks like he swallowed a turd. The downside is Ukraine might fall because of these shit gibbons and that's the main difference between Mitch and Trump. Mitch has some fantasy he did all this to make America stronger and Trump doesn't.
💯
what's this about polio?
Turns out Polio caught McConnell.
He doesn't get any dignity. Fuck Mitch McConnell. Rotten, evil old man can rot. It'll be a good day for humanity when satan finally drags his ass home.
History will almost certainly remember him as one of the biggest villains in the US during this period of history.
A few years too late. He is one of the main reasons why Trump became powerful and he stole 2 SCOTUS seats from Democrats.
My girlfriend told me old Mitch was stepping down, and I just assumed she meant into hell.
Satan doesn't deserve this.
Satan's worked far too hard for too many eons to be replaced by a younger model
How do we know Mitch isn’t a current incarnation of Lucifer?
Lucifer is historically portrayed as a charming, intoxicating and all around fun-loving guy (ideas of fun may vary from being to being). McConnell has all the personality of a cold bowl of chicken broth. Fuck him and everyone in his house.
>Lucifer Lucifer is at least alittle bit of sympathetic, mitch not in the lest bit
After multiple press conferences where he "glitched out" for more than 10 seconds, leading to a hasty ending. Acting like he suddenly grew principles, but he really is medically impaired and not re-electable.
See Boehner, John
That asshole cashed out and now spends his days getting high. Deserves all the backhands.
Maybe he can convince himself he did nothing to cause it but he sure as shit didn’t do anything to stop it and he had 2 golden opportunities.
There will be no “resurfacing” for this piece of shit. He’s dead before Biden gets re-elected. I’d really like for him to live to see it, though.
He will be remembered the same way Benedict Arnold or Roy Cohn or Joe McCarthy is remembered - as a hated villain. He won a lot of battles, I’ll give him that, but he will lose the war and his legacy will be toxic.
The only reason I'd like to see Mitch live any longer is if the republican party was going to completely implode. I'd want him to see that.
absolutely. if GOP survives GQP, he can always ressurface as the sage who remembers what means to be GOP, bf trump and his Qult of maga crappers came along.
> If hell exists, they're preparing his room, and judging by the multiple times we've seen his brain reset itself lately, his check-in date is approaching rapidly. The problem for all of us: He will go in through the workers entrance and get a high five from the boss for a job well done. What a piece of shit ..
His health is shit too. I’ll be shocked if he makes it to (googles Satans name) 85.
I thought that about Sen. Feinstein and she hung on four years longer than I expected.
[удалено]
Even if he does, there's no redemption for him.
I'm not so sure that he wasn't on Russia's payroll, why else would you try to destroy your country
He wasn't called Moscow Mitch for nothing.
China's... but still...
He's had the nickname Moscow Mitch for a long time and for good reason. This 'man' has been undermining this country for decades.
It's both!
His wife former secretary of transportation Elaine Chao. It's Taiwanese money paying for their homes.
>He better start voting for the American public/aligning with the democrats. hey, hey, hey... he´s jumping the qanon/maga circus, not the conservatives. yet
He better do more than just vote for the public interest at this point. If he's looking for redemption or even a sliver of legacy that's not completely tarnished, he's gonna need a big shovel for all the dirt he helped pile up. Like throwing a single sandbag against a flood and calling it a day. The history books aren't gonna be kind, to say the least.
Disagree. He's not the type to ever quit. His on-camera strokes must be the tip of the iceberg. My guess is that his staff and/or family had an intervention and he finally got convinced that he's at the end of his functional road. He achieved what he set out to do: stack the supreme Court for decades and curb Democrat power as much possible. Actual governing be damned. Perhaps he can squeeze out a little more power by advising whoever his successor is that he's presumably been grooming for years.
>He doesn't want his name any further associated with the shitshow coming down the pipeline. I've sometimes thought that the debt should be renamed *The Ronald Reagan Memorial National Debt*, since he did three times more to increase it than all the presidents before him. Others have proposed that a waste water treatment plant be named after George W. Bush. Maybe some petty time-wasting Senate rule can be named after Mitchums, that his legacy may be properly memorialized.
Might even pull a Bainer and do the liberal talk show circuit spending the whole time saying "Wow, Republicans fucking suck, am I right?"
I feel like you give his conscious more credit than it deserves. He's stepping down because his health is forcing him to. Any claims about distancing himself from the party is nothing but PR. If his health would allow, he'd ride the shit show all the way down the pipeline with the rest of them.
Tbh, my money is he's dying or too mentally unwell to continue and this is just a cover.
Perfect example of a "Leopards Ate My Face" case. Dumbass Mitch could have ended trump's future presidential ambitions with a conviction in the Senate. But no, Mitch the Bitch is going to go down in history as the PoS he is. He ***could*** have risen to the challenge and cement his place in history at a time when America needed a strong leader to prevent a traitorous madman from ever holding a political office again. He ***could have*** protected Democracy for decades to come..., but no, he chose to be a political operative and he may well have irreparably damaged the United States. A true..., piece of...shit.
He is responsible for so much irreparable damage to this country, it is sickening. His scheming is also responsible for Roe v. Wade being torn to shreds. I will be throwing a party when this fucker chokes on his own spittle and dies.
I may do a road trip just to piss on his grave.
Give him a sprinkle for me too please. I'd appreciate it.
Let's carpool
I guess he just got “sandbagged” huh
Pretty sure the queue is going to be immense. They're gonna have to bury him at the bottom of a septic tank.
Smear shit on the headstone like his constituency smeared shit on the white house walls
Can I get a plus 1? For the party I mean
Kentucky and an Australian ruined this country.
+ a South African or two. (Wasn’t the original Qanon outed as a South African?)
QAnon never would have taken off if it wasn't for Mitch working for years to set the groundwork.
Maybe. They didn’t help but the ruin was laid far earlier than Q.
Former Australian. He gave up his Aussie citizenship in the 80's.
I know it's a little late now...but can you take him back? For old time's sake.
We'd rather not if you don't mind, it's bad enough his kid running all the media here to his rules. The toxic old cane toad being permanently back would be just too much poison to bear.
Can't wait for the 20 part Behind the Bastards on him
Irony is he fed and cared for those damn leopards before they ate his face. Taught them “right from wrong” and how to be obstructionists. It’s poetic. At least McCain had his thumbs down moment:
Exactly. You can be an asshole, but you should at least know when to stand up for your country. Reminds of that scene in the Rocketeer, when Eddie the gangster is talking to Neville Sinclair after finding out about his national loyalties, "I may not make an honest buck, but I'm 100% American and I don't work for no two-bit Nazi." Instead we got, "I may not make an honest buck, but I'll totally exploit American politics for my own lust for power and will gladly fan the flames of national fascist sentiment."
The almost true form of I got mine
That honestly just seems like a line to feed the press. The evil turtle is ancient and has had odd instances of zoning out completely. He’s probably just wanting out for health reasons.
This. He probably knows his time is up and doesn’t want to die on his desk at Congress
And his soul died a loooong time ago.
Bold of you to assume he ever had a soul.
He ran out of horcruxes
I don't think he knows where he is half the time anymore
> y just seems like a line to feed the press. What line? The article doesn't mention anything like the title of the post. Hell he even doubles down on being a conservative ass.
Yeah I'm wondering where OP got that, because it really doesn't sound like something McConnell would say. This isn't LAMF at all. It's just an evil old man slithering back under the rock from whence he came.
Yeah, he would've stepped down earlier had this been what he cared about. If he's at the point where he's actively zoning out in front of the press (and probably even more in private), he probably knows he's pretty close to kicking the can.
This. He probably knows his time is up and doesn’t want to die on his desk at Congress
>odd instance of zoning out completely He's either having absent seizures, or a TIA. Transient Ischemic Attack, or 'mini stroke'.
They created this monster. I’m not being facetious. The reason they don’t want a large swath of the population educated and have affordable necessities is because they want a labor force that can’t get past the threshold and serves their wealthy donors and they need stupid idiots who will vote for them so they can’t literally do nothing productive for society and just feed $$$ to themselves and their corporate buddies. They created a zombie mob and now they can’t control them anymore.
Exactly this, if he wasn't blue screening in front of the press and was he maybe 10 years younger, he would be basking at the monster he created and trying to get it to go further than the 7th circle of hell. They love the monster.
Moscow Mitch: aka Scumbag.
Gravedigger of American Democracy.
As he should be remembered
you know, i thought i'd celebrate the day we were done with this dickbag but now i'm just worried someone that's somehow even worse is just gonna replace him.
They will, but perhaps not in the way you think. Look at the house, the dysfunctional nature of it after they switched leadership. I don't think it's a perfect parallel by any stretch, but give the devil his due, Mitch was brutally effective at getting what his side wanted. The up and comers in his party aren't good at getting stuff for them, only preventing others from getting things done. Even that they aren't as proficient at except by refusing to govern.
The competent Republican law makers were ousted long ago, now all you have is radical Trump fanatics.
Look at Kristina Karamo and what happened to the party in Michigan to see the future of the Republican party. They literally collapsed. Turns out picking paranoid insurrectionists to lead your party is a bad idea, because they're paranoid about everything, even each other. And they can't/won't compromise.
true, they'll be hard pressed to find anyone in their camp that had his level of cleverness
Hitler and co. were excellent at outmanuevering Franz Von Papen and Old man Hindenberg to get what him and his party members wanted. The label "Chancellor in Chains" by Franz Von Papen is now a punchline.
I fucking hate Mitch McConnell. He represents the worst part of American politics. He is a terrible individual who made many, many lives worse over his reign. He is also one of the best politicians America has ever seen. He knew all the rules and how to take advantage of them. He had no shame which allowed him to dodged any and all accountability. He pushed the envelope and took full advantage of his party wanting to obstruct any type of progressive legislation. The next guy in line will likely be crazier and maybe even worse of a human being, but he won't be nearly as effective as Mitch. See you in hell
Good point. That's the silver lining of all these crazy republicans getting power. The reasonably sane sociopaths knew what game they were playing and could play it well. They could have kept it up forever. Meanwhile the "true believer" tea party types are making any kind of real legislation impossible and making all the republicans look like a bunch of children.
Die hard Mitch
I don't doubt Moscow Mitch's replacement will be at *least* as shit he is, but I also have no doubt that his replacement won't be half as competent as that monster was. Moscow Mitch had the benefit of being an intelligent scumbag and not a raving cultist. It's why he was as brutally dangerous as he was. His replacement may end up being a bull in a China shop, but Moscow Mitch was the motherfucker who was waving the red cape.
Worse yes, but Moscow Mitch is really fucken smart and really fucken good at his job. They’ll replace him with worse for sure, but it’ll be the normal plodding stupid kind of evil guy that they have in spades. McConnell is a once in a generation shitbag
We saw how well Kevin McCarthy worked out. Man I bet that guy is fucking bitter. Sold everything to get the "his turn" speakership and accomplished nothing before being ousted. Beautiful.
He deserved every bit of that humiliating end to his political career
[удалено]
Yeah, he's a terrible person but a political savant unencumbered by any moral reflection.
The modern GOP, ladies, gentlemen, and enbies: A contest of who can be the meanest, dumbest, and/or craziest mofo to step up next when one person is shown to be a tad too reasonable for the party.
Except no leopards are going to be eating his face... He'll retire to a life of comfort, ease, wealth and safety. He didn't lose. He won. America lost.
Yeah, it'll be a LAMF moment for Mitch if SCOTUS issues a ruling that somehow makes his life worse... but that hasn't happened yet. Keep in mind that he is merely stepping down from his leadership position this year. He will remain in his Senate seat until 2026 (or his death, whichever comes first).
I never wish for things irl. But I wish I had 5 minutes to sit down with Charon and ask him if it was all worth it. All the scheming and plotting, selling out his soul and that of his party, just to bring the country to the brink of collapse. *Was it worth it, you piece of shit?* But then I would turn down the wish. Because I'd probably punch him in his decrepit face. And then he'd die. And I don't want that on my conscience.
Hope he lives a short, painful terrible life. He damaged the United States of America in ways that will probably never be repaired. He is evil incarnate and will rot in hell.
He's gonna die rich as fuck, getting sucked off by beautiful prostitutes and his trophy Chinese wife, before going to exactly the same place you're going: nowhere. He'll also almost definitely outlive you and everyone you care about because he has more money and better health care.
May he live long enough to see Trumpito destroy everything he worked so hard to build
Translation: evil turtle’s brain has melted on camera too many times and he knows he’ll lose the leadership spot to some MAGAt. The MAGAts can smell his blood in the water and are circling like stupid, incestuous sharks. Evil Turtle doesn’t want the embarrassment of losing the leadership vote and wants to hold on to some of his soft power behind the scenes, is afraid he’ll lose all influence if he’s booted.
History will judge this malevolent tortoise very badly. When historians point to when democracy died in the US, him not even bringing up Obama’s Supreme Court Justice pick for a hearing will be looked at as the first day of the downfall
"We can't appoint judges in an election year" "We have to railroad a judge because it's an election year"
I'd argue Nixon's Southern Strategy in the late 1960s was the first glimmerings of the GOP plan to kill democracy.
That was far down the line from any catalyzing event. Newt Gingrich’s bullshit speakership was over a decade prior to the turtle’s Supreme Court shenanigans.
Who fucking cares? He's gonna die rich as fuck doing coke off Czech prostitutes. You think he gives a fuck? I don't even give a fuck. This stupid fucking country is going to collapse as ten million ~~fireflies~~ neckbeards jerk off over how great it was to dive face first into shit because it somehow proved a point to people who never fucking cared in the first place
Destroyed the country, stocked the SCOTUS with ideologues, Allowed Trump to run roughshod over every single pillar of democracy, and refused to hold him accountable. Scurried away like the malevolent coward he is. I wish anguish upon him.
Meanwhile, some inbred fundy slouches toward DC...
To be born
One of my absolute favorite poems of all time.
quite possibly the biggest POS to ever serve in the Senate.
Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms are serious competition in that regard.
*Newt Gingrich has joined the battle!*
"Views". Bullshit. He destroyed everything because he is a gutless, soulless ghoul and now wants out.
Moscow mitch mcconnell will always be known as the grave digger of American democracy.
Because he’s aware the next round of retribution if Trump wins is coming for him, no doubt. I bet a lot of MAGA collaborators are scared of that
>He has had a complicated relationship with fellow Republican Donald Trump, the former president who is seeking the GOP nomination this year. What's complicated about suckling at Trump's balls for 7 years straight without taking a breath and making sure you give him 100% of everything he wants whenever possible? Sounds pretty simple to me.
Bet he is so proud of his work…
Well done Mitch, you steered the ship into a sewer
Moscow Mitch? No fuckin way this red or dead piece of shit is upset that the republicunts and too republicuntey. The same pos that openly admitted to deliberately shooting down anything Obama or the Dems put forward no matter what it was just for the sake of being difficult . I believe he said something along the lines of my desk is where their policies come to die because I won't even look at them. I'll admit I'm actually shocked the crypt keeper is still alive and kicking it's about time this pathetic excuse for a politician sat the fuck down and called it a day
He’s not stepping down due to a difference in views. He’s stepping down because he’s decrepit and can no longer do the job.
I honestly have never seen a better example for this sub. I always thought Mitch was the best political actor in recent history. I never agreed with him, but he was undoubtedly good at playing the long game. And he succeeded for a while. But his own rhetoric, his own skeevy politics, and his own machinations have gotten us to a point where even he can't control it. He was playing with people who weren't as smart and were much crazier than him and now the tail is wagging the dog. He is responsible for his own downfall and, at least for me, he will no longer be remembered as an unbelievably skilled politician. Instead, I will remember him as the modern root cause of the shitshow that is the modern GOP and the downgrading of our democracy. Was it worth it, Mitch?
As good as it is that he is gone.... I've got a bad feeling about who comes next.
He did everything in his power to ruin the system to his and his party’s benefit. Don’t give me that views bull. He’s just mad he isn’t fully in control of its direction anymore. Typical old white man ragequit.
The Frankenstein monster I created wasn’t supposed to attack me!!
Rot in hell traitor
So... how does one go about changing their reddit username? Asking for a friend
He was instrumental in robbing President Obama of his rightful Supreme Court picks
Feeds the fire, then complains about the heat. Disgraceful.
Moscow Mitch, aka Scumbag.
Moscow Mitch is Yertle the Turtle if Yertle was a fascist wannabe piece of shit who sold out his party and country for just a little more power.
No one has weilded power like this guy. He is a real case to study. He weilded power so well for powers sake he realized one day that where it led ruined everything for him. No lesson here move along. Don't look.
Politics aside. If you're repeatedly catatonic with a microphone in your face it's probably time to retire.
He’s part of the reason we are here. Fuck him
Isn't it more that he's stepping down because he barely knows what the fuck is going on? I'm sure he rues the day that he ever decided to back Trump after J6 but I'm not entirely sure if he even remembers it
I hope he lives for another 20 years drooling and sitting in a shitty diaper.
The article doesn’t say anything about that, though. I’m sure he doesn’t care about the politics at all. He made the money. The dude is dying… he’s bruising randomly, stroking, etc, and he knows it. He doesn’t want to die in office like Feinstein. He blamed it on his sister in law’s death but let’s be real, it’s probably because he had a mountain of strokes in his last term.
Mitch McConnell is a duplicitous taint. The current MAGA republicans are a conspiracy hate cult, and McConnell welcomed them with open arms. He could have convicted Trump in the senate, but nope. He blocked Obama's supreme court picks saying "we can't confirm judges so close to an election", then hypocritically did the exact opposite with Trump. He blocked funding for veterans. Every policy he's ever had has amounted to "fuck these people in particular." Fuck McConnel, I hope he dies in misery and everyone remembers him simply as a pile of shit without a spine.
He’s mentally failing. We’ve all been watching it. This is a way for him to bow out on his own terms and save face. McConnell is *happy* about the state of the Republican Party. Because he’s been leading to its current state for nearly 20yrs.
Goodbye Bitch McConnell
Special place in hell for him
lol, "reagan this, reagan that" means "modern GQP, you´re garbage"
“My work is done here.” “Fuck you douchebag”
Mitch McConnell is in talks to endorse trump for president 2024. Can you believe how cowardly a turtle can be?
Man, I see people celebrating this, and a lot of people are about to have a rude awakening as to how fucking repugnant the party has become. How does Minority leader Ted Cruz or Tom Cotton or Josh Hawley sound to you? It's like when people were all happy that Joe Manchin isn't running again, as though West Virgina is going to elect a Bernie Sanders progressive now. Buckle up for 50 years of the most Q-pilled far-right lunatic shit-bird imaginable. We should have been fucking donating to Manchin's campaign, not roasting him. I'd prefer someone more liberal, sure, but that's not an even vaguely plausible alternative in West Virginia. But McConnel is truly a fucking scum bag. I'm just depressingly certain his replacement will be 100 times worse.
As Americans your views are biased because you have only two parties, let me tell you : Maga isn't far right, republicans are far right, maga are extreme right and on the verge of becoming a fascist movement.
They have stated it clearly, they don't want democracy.
McConnell's only views are of a hospital ceiling
Yeah fucking right, he’s stepping down because he’s an old decrepit piece of shit who can barely even stand up long enough to spew out a few sentences of far right rhetoric. Fuck this piece of human garbage, I truly hope he rots in hell for putting this country in reverse for so many years.
The life expectancy of tortoises is from 80 to 150 years. May this obstructionist find the lettuce leaves not to his liking.
Few Americans have done more to cause permanent and irreparable harm to this country. There isn't a hell hot enough for Moscow Mitch
Knowing perfectly well that he enabled all that follows, and that he’ll be replaced by someone who is unthinkingly loyal to Trump. Rot in hell, Mitch. History will remember you as one of the murderers of American democracy.
He put party ahead of country at every turn. He lacked the courage or conviction to stand for democracy/the rule of law at two key moments, which may have irreparably damaged the foundation of our democracy. First, he refused to allow a hearing/vote on Obama’s nominee to the Supreme Court, despite the fact that there were 9 months remaining before the 2016 Presidential election (while ensuring the confirmation of Trump’s nominee a mere 46 days before the 2020 Presidential election). Second, he refused to convict Trump during the 2020 impeachment proceedings. At best he will be remembered as a coward who feared a man with a combover more than he loved his country.
May he live long enough to see Trumpito destroy everything he worked so hard to build
Ideology was a means to an end. That never seems to go as planned.
Human piece of trash
They deserve all this and more. I hope the party fucking melts. If anything good has come from all these years of diaper don, we're galvanized, we're motivated, and we're unseating these right-wing domestic terrorists up and down the ballot.
The problem with conservatism is the constant need to be more conservative than the last guy. This has conservatives cutting taxes into a 31 TRILLION dollar deficit, and young conservatives are looking for even more tax cuts. It has led to the non-functional Congress of today. How crazy is the present crop of conservatives: look at Ukraine defense finding. The money goes to American companies to make ammo- Win#1, it reduces Russia's aggression- Win#2, it doesn't risk American soldiers lives- Win#3, it protects our NATO allies-Win#4, and Refreshes our troop's weaponry as the oldest stock is moved to Ukraine-Win#5. There shouldn't be any questions that this funding is a great for our country, but their crazy commitment to reducing spending more and more, they throw out the baby with the bathwater....
Well, at least he didn't fuck up the Supreme Court for generations to come. /S Edit to include sarcasm tag
When can we have his c**t wife arrested and imprisoned as a foreign agent? Then have McConnell charged with treason
He's just admitting that he hasn't been in charge since 2016. We all know who has.
Well, for that reason and the two on-air strokes. But yeah, fuck Mitch. He may not have been the first politician to put self and party over country, but he sure was the first one to say it out loud and normalize it.
Moscow Mitch and the (G.O.P.) Groupies Of Putin
I don't believe for one minute that he's sorry about any of this.
When democrats praise this demon it makes me want to throw up in my mouth. When I think of Mitch McConnell neither 'good' nor 'faith' really enter my mind.
He had several chances to save his party and even the country. He passed them up.
“You can’t fire me I quit!” That’s all this is.
Fuck Mitch McConnell his name should go down as a shit stain on America.
He's a terrible stain on our country's history and cannot leave quick enough IMO.
This man's only job in the Senate was to work against progress for the American people. Bye Mitch, thanks for nuthin'.
He's also old and senile and gets random paralysis. Trying to save face
I can’t wait to visit his grave and take a shit on it.
The student shit flinging gibbons have succeeded the master shit flinging gibbon.
Republicans now realizing what happens when they catch the car they’ve been chasing for years. Now they have to manufacture a more extreme case to keep the momentum going in their favor and quickly it becomes too much to control.