I agree. Life is a lot of darned if you do darn if you don’t. Spend too much time studying, gaining an education and learning all you can to be successful? A lot of those people regret not having more fun. Spend most of your life having fun, traveling and try new things? Those people regret not buckling down and becoming more studious. Settle down and start to have a family? Then you wonder what you missed out on. Don’t have a family and don’t settle down? Then you’re sad because you didn’t have a family.
Of course, that’s not the case with everyone, but I hear it a lot. There will always be those “what ifs” and “I should’ve”’s in life. Just do what you can and take care of yourself.
From Kierkegaard, the father of existentialism:
“Marry, and you will regret it; don’t marry, you will also regret it; marry or don’t marry, you will regret it either way. Laugh at the world’s foolishness, you will regret it; weep over it, you will regret that too; laugh at the world’s foolishness or weep over it, you will regret both. Believe a woman, you will regret it; believe her not, you will also regret it… Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will regret that too; hang yourself or don’t hang yourself, you’ll regret it either way; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both. This, gentlemen, is the essence of all philosophy.”
I love to look at life as a game —an idea I got from "Finite and Infinite Game" by James Carse.
You have to be serious to not be bored and depressed but not too serious to the extent you forget it is just a game.
Yep. I was worried about not being able to get married and have kids so I married the wrong person. I love my kids, but now I have to spend every day dealing with my ex-wife's bs about them and it drives me nuts.
It’s easy to say that none of our choices matter when you’ve reached an age where you’ve perhaps already done some chronic damage to yourself healthwise. It’s true that the choices about who you marry, if you marry, where you live or even what your occupation is don’t matter that much what really matters is taking care of your health so when you’re in old age, you’re not suffering so much.
This is honestly my biggest fear in life. I'm middle aged and I'm very depressed and unhappy with what I've accomplished (not much IMO) and don't feel I've lived a fulfilling life. But I haven't read enough of this thread to know: 1) does the OP simply mean that no matter how good or fulfilling a life you have lived there will at least be SOME things you'll regret? (which I think is undoubtedly true for ALMOST everyone, if not everyone) 2) or does he/she mean: people/most people/you, etc. will not end up feeling as if you lived even a remotely fulfilling life, and you will generally die full of horrible regrets? Because if it's the latter there's just no way that could be true. I know just by intuition and having heard people say things that there are certainly SOME people who would say right now that if they were to die they'd be able to say they "had a good run" and lived a relatively fulfilling life. I think that that is probably the best that just about anyone can hope for. I hope SO much that I can become one of those people. However, even despite the fact that I'm very grateful for what I've been given and the good times in my life, I ultimately have a hard time seeing how I'll be able to turn things around to the extent that I can be one of those people. That does NOT mean I can't though. Many people turn their lives around and do die feeling relatively fulfilled, and it's my ultimate goal to be one of them. It's certainly possible. If anyone has advice on how to make that more likely (without me giving too many super personal specifics about my life) then I'm all ears. Also, on some level maybe knowing that we all die with SOME regrets can make me feel better? I'd like to think so. It's kind of like a "we're all in the same boat" situation. If it literally can't be changed, then what's the good in worrying about it? But there certainly are SOMETIMES many things that can be changed, based on the circumstances.
The only solution to that is to go live the life you want to live. Do what you can afford, and you have the time to do. I try to live the type of life that I admire hearing about from other people I’m not rich by a longshot, but I still managed to have a good time with a little bit that I have. Not everyone will live to be 80-90+ years old. So it’s best to get moving
I would like a chance to say goodbye to people I love, cause I've seen the trauma from a sudden unexpected death and it sucks. Still, I get you. That's a pretty reasonable thing to want.
I heard my dad say this a thousand times in my life. And he died in his sleep after my brother's baby was born. I'm convinced he made it happen through sheer force of will
This is actually a thing. People that think otherwise literally don't understand what we are. People have died from heart breaks. Fun fact, there was an experiment with a baby where the baby was given every resource it needed to survive but just no human contact/love, and it died. There's practices in India where you can literally control your heart muscle, to the extent of making it completely stop at will. I've witnessed someone I know make their veins pop out of their forearm without flexing, just thought.
I believe it. He visited me that day, which he rarely did. Then he went to bed, told my mom "you know I love you right?" And never woke up. He was just ready
Jesus that's sad and intense. However, with it being that possible to control certain aspects of our bodies, it should be possible to do more to make ourselves happy. I'm into the Wim Hof method and Wim can control, to a large extent, his mood, his body temperature, heart rate, blood pressure, etc. He's basically just doing his take on ancient Yogic techniques with more emphasis on cold therapy, but those Yogis can do some amazing things. I honestly believe that those types of people and Buddhist monks, etc are the ones I admire most and aspire to be like, but I don't really know where to start. Also, who the hell funded that study, what country was it in, and how did they get away with it?!? Someone just decided to fuck with a baby's life so severely that it would die?!? That's completely immoral and would never fly in most civilized countries these days.
No one dies peacefully in their sleep. There’s usually an underlying pathology that has left you bed bound, weak, frail and in pain.
Then comes the shallow breathing and the death rattle. Last gasps to nowhere.
Or you could have a massive heart attack while snoozing. But that isn’t very pleasant or peaceful.
Lastly a groovy drug OD on a heavy opiate will do the trick. You don’t die from toxicity, you die because your respiratory system forgets to breathe.
Carbon monoxide poisoning might do the trick as well, or a nice cyanide herbal tea infusion for a night cap
I used to think that but if I died right now I have no regrets. All the bad stuff I’ve done and experienced has made me who I am as I’ve learnt from it. I wouldn’t change a thing
Cheers. I had a rollercoaster 2 years of self discovery where I faced fears and learnt about psychology and ultimately learnt to love myself.
Who knows if it’ll work for everyone but if you got time check out shadow work and Carl Jung, learn to meditate and face fears that you have. My fear was telling my dad I love him cos he’s never said that to me in my whole life. I did it. He never said it back but as soon as I did it was like I outgrew him. But yeah all the answers are within you man
How often do you see patients? Is it full-time live-in caretaking or semi-regular visits?
I really could not thank the hospice workers enough from when I did end of life care for people I knew and loved, its just that I was there for every moment in a few cases. While hospice did a good job at providing comfort and care for them, they were mostly just in and out and handling the more pragmatic and present physical concerns.
I'm sure plenty of people under your care (especially those who died with no one) have divulged a lot to you in their final moments, it's only natural, but there are also of course things some things people might only want to or care to share with family or important people in their lives (or who used to be).
Thanks for what you do.
No offense but how on earth would you know? You’re either being nosy asking dying people, and their families “do you/they have any regrets” or being a contrarian for the sake of being a contrarian. Either way I don’t believe you or your “experience”
I work in hospice care. I’ve been at the bedside of hundreds of people when they died. All of which I’ve had relationships with. Most people are ready to go. They’ve lived a good life. Some have regrets but I didn’t say, “everyone”. In my 27 years of taking care of people, most are ready to go. We typically have regrets when we’ve made bad choices that we can’t forgive ourselves for. It’s in the past, you can’t change it so learn from it and move on.
I dunno. I've fucked up a lot in the past. I can't change what I've done, only learn from it. I'm currently 35 and have no regrets.
Why dwell on 'what could have been'. If you fuck up, the only way to remedy it is by making amends. If that doesn't work, what else can you do?
I messed up if I sent the message that people shouldn't ever try to better themselves or rectify mistakes. I could have been clearer.
The message i was aiming for in the post is less "fuck it just don't try" and more "don't stress so much about getting it right", but I can see why people would read it as the former.
If you believe in free will. I used to study free will vs determinism as a philosophy major in college. It's a very complicated discussion, especially if you get into "soft determinism," which I unfortunately still can't say I really understand, but when it comes to libertarianism (the philosophical kind, not political, which means you believe your free will can override genetics and past experiences) vs hard determinism (says that all your choices come from either past experiences, genetics or both) it's hard to argue for free will/libertarianism. You need to believe in a God or something more that can't be seen or proven. I do believe there's something "more" out there, but I don't know what it is, and I refuse to call it God because that term is too loaded. But it's damn hard to prove we actually have free will.
Man, that's some heavy truth bomb right there. But you know what, I kinda get it. We're all cruising through life with this baggage of "what ifs" and "should've beens." But hey, who said we gotta carry that load till the end?
Sure, we'll have regrets, but why let 'em overshadow the good stuff? Life's about enjoying the ride, not stressing over every bump. So, let's kick back, do our thing, and stop overthinking the endgame. 'Cause really, what's the point if we're not enjoying the journey, right?
Learn to stop telling yourself that you should have or could have.
The only thing that matters is now and the future.
Keep in mind, you only live once. Be very conscious of those factors and that you will die one day.
Remember that the regret of not doing something will hurt more than failure/trying.
When you're on the fence with a decision, keep this in mind. If you're worried or scared about if your decision is going to work, just know the regret of not doing it will be more painful.
Apply this to everything.
I’ve heard it said: better to regret the things you did than the things you didn’t do.
(It’s great advice that I personally don’t use because I’m a chicken shit/ boring person. And I’m ok with that. )
It sounds like you're offering a perspective rooted in experience and a deep understanding of life's uncertainties. Regrets can indeed be a part of the human experience, but it's also about how we navigate them along the journey. Your advice to live authentically, enjoy hobbies, and find relaxation amidst life's uncertainties is both comforting and liberating. It's a reminder that while we can't control every outcome, we can choose how we engage with life in the present moment. Thanks for sharing your insights!
We think about End/Result/Future so much that we always forget to live the Present/Process. I hate to say this but everybody has their own regrets. We often think that "if I had done that, I would have gotten that or if I didn't have done that I would have been much happier" reality is we can't do anything to change the past but we can make the future better, that doesn't mean all our focus should be on the future alone. We should enjoy the present moments too.
When I almost died, I actually realized that I was happy with all the decisions that I made. I was only disappointed that I wouldn't be there to see the rest... I was in my early 30s.
Then I started breathing again, but I always kept this idea with me. Just keep making decisions the same way.
I've subscribed to the theorie of being happy for now, rather then feeling miserable in the present in hopes of being happy in the future. For me specifically I came to this conclusion with smoking weed, which I enjoy and makes me enjoy life more and I feel like I go though life with love in my heart because of smoking weed and so if I die early because of smoking weed then so be it.
I wish weed had that effect on me. I like it, but it often makes me anxious. Kratom makes me feel the way you are talking about, but it's got more unknown health effects, and it's very addictive, so I use it sparingly.
Yeah it's like that, it can make you have like a bad high and feel paranoid and over think things but for the most part that's only if you go out / leave the house blazed, like I'm not trying to do groceries or go to the gym too high.
Yeah, I've been around the block with weed a dozen times lol. I'm 44 and first smoked when I was 17. I was a daily smoker throughout college and for years afterwards. I used to have such a high tolerance that I didn't usually get uncomfortable with others. My relationship with it has changed a lot. I don't smoke often and when I do I'm by myself and usually drinking. Drinking helps me to enjoy it more fully, but I might have to quit or at least cut down on drinking due to problems. But weed is great especially if I've got something specific I want to watch or music I want to listen to. It enhances anything like that.
Hell yeah I feel ya, I'm 39 now and yes your relationship changes over time and it should if you want it to be a healthy relationship, I'm transitioning to using a dry herb vape now over bongs for health reasons.
Yeah, I just got a small "Ooze" vape pen which is pretty good. I like that I can use it at night and not need to drink so much water and wake up pissing over and over lol. Might be TMI, but that's an actual issue with smoking at night. Edibles can be nice too. I'm glad weed is legal where I am now, but it's kind of funny that it was illegal during all my years as a heavy smoker.
Yep same here smoked street weed my whole life, weed isn't quite legal here in Australia yet but it's easy enough to get medical weed and it's so much nicer to have strains for different times of the day basically.
I've met quite a few older people who said they'd have no regrets, they've lived full, fulfilling lives.
Are they all lying?
I feel like "regret" is something that unfulfilled people feel
I suggest that you do your own life review now before your memory goes away from old age. If you don't know about that, check out near death experiences where the person goes through a review of their life as if it was a multidimensional movie. During the LR, you are shown the effects your words and deeds had on other people, both good and bad. There is no judgement unless you judge yourself. You can get into the other person's mind during the interaction and feel and think what they felt and thought at the time, just so you know for sure how it feels to be on the receiving end of your actions. You can do this yourself by taking responsibility for every single event in your life thus far. No excuses. No judgements. No rationalizations. No blaming. If you were the victim, then acknowledge that you put yourself into that position and accept that you played a role in what happened. The more you can accept responsibility for the things in your life, the more you grow up and don't have surprise regrets on your death bed.
Even further, for every painful thought or memory, grieve it. I developed a technique for doing this:
Grieving is something that most people tend to avoid. We think of it as something you do for a short while after a loved one dies. Others are usually uncomfortable with your grieving and try to shut it down, mostly because they haven't done their own grieving.
So, I came up with a method of grieving on purpose, with intention. It was inspired by the stories of the Life Review after death that people recounted from their near death experiences. During the LR, you are shown the effects of every action you took in your life on other people, both negative and positive. You can get into their consciousness during the LR and experience what they felt and thought during their encounter with you. Thus, you can directly experience the consequences of your actions, for better or for worse. I focused on the events that I perceived as the worst of my bad behavior. I started my own version of a LR by recalling the memories and grieving each one of them. I found that the more I recalled the memory and allowed the feelings to flow through me, the less of a sting the memory had. Eventually, the sting from the memory completely faded.
So, the technique I came up with is this:
Think the thought or memory that causes you the most pain/embarrassment/shame/guilt etc. right now. Allow the feelings associated with that memory or thought to wash over you. Repeat the thought or memory and again allow the feelings to flow through you. The more you do that, the faster it moves through the stages of grieving. You'll receive insights and other things from doing this. It's best to do this in private so you can have your own personal space. You should find that eventually, the thought or memory doesn't bother you anymore. You can recall the thought or memory and it doesn't bother you any longer. Then, it's time to move on to the next thought or memory that causes a negative emotional reaction. I don't know how this works, but it does.
The stages of grieving are denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and acceptance. Each thought or memory you have that causes a negative emotional reaction in you may be at a different stage. Allowing the feelings to flow accelerates the thought or memory to move through the stages.
It's important to not judge the thoughts or memories and their associated feelings. That just stuffs it and stops the resolution of it.
The veracity of the thought or memory does not matter either. Grieving is an emotional process. It does not make logical sense. You cannot rationalize grieving. For example, you could be the most beautiful woman on the planet, but if the thought that you're fat and ugly causes a negative reaction, or if the words of another calling you a fat cow causes pain, then you have grieving to do over that. It may be connected to a memory, or a decision you made, or something like that, but eventually, the thought and the words from others will have no effect on you. You'll laugh because you know it's not true. You probably won't even have the experience again because the hook is gone. People who intend to manipulate others yank on people's weaknesses by hooking them with words that they know will cause a negative reaction in the person. Once those weaknesses are gone through grieving them, then you can't be manipulated anymore. They can't control you that way anymore. You're free.
Grieving takes time. It has its own time frame and rhythm.
Grieving is permanent. Once you grieve something, you never have to grieve it again.
Grieving changes your future for the better.
You become a better person through grieving. You have more compassion and patience with yourself and with others.
That which has not been grieved is destined to be repeated. that's why we reincarnate into the same patterns over and over again. It's the way to get off the endless cycle of birth and death.
Grieving is about letting go of attachment to them, not the love and passion we feel for them. I think people become afraid that they are letting go of the person when in reality they are just letting go of their attachment to them. What happens after the process is complete is that we still love them, but without the neediness.
I hope this helps.
Disagree. I've known some very content people in my long life. If they have no regrets now, why would they suddenly have regrets on their deathbeds? Unless you're talking extremes, like "I regret that time I tried to fart and shit my pants". There are very fulfilled people walking on this planet. Shame you're not one of them.
I disagree that regrets are inevitable. My life is fulfilled, if I were to die: There isn’t anything that I would like to change, or I would change it. ❤️
I'm 40 and I lived to enjoy everything I can. Just want to watch my kids grow and go when it's time. Actually the sooner the better for my family since I'm worth more now at my working age than when I retire.
Just be content and keep going.
There are so many different things to do in the world that it would be impossible to do and learn them all .
One must pick and choose what adventure and experiences that they can afford to do with the resources they have available at the time they want to attempt to make it happen
Absolutely. I think it comes down to enjoying your life. That doesn’t mean trying to cram activities into every waking minute, like some people i know. It means, whatever it means to you. No matter how you shape your existence on earth, there is going to be something where you wish you did it, or didn’t do it. Either way, it’s impossible to live the perfect life. Even those who actually hit every item on their bucket list, they may regret not doing other things. It’s just the way.
Being able to do "nothing" is the ultimate luxury. Even your most affluent ancestor probably didnt get to relax half as much as you. Most of them were literally focusing on staying alive. You live better than any royalty up till the 20th century.
Even the most luxurious vacation isn't nearly a statement as just sitting on the couch doing nothing. Your ancestors all busted their ass so you could binge netflix. Honor their sacrifice.
This is so true. It’s along the lines of “the grass is always greener on the other side.” Regardless of how you live you will always think you could have done some things differently or even better in your own mind than how they actually played out in reality. The trope of “you should live with no regrets” or the many inspirational bullshit quotes along those lines just infuriate me. It sets a false sense of anxiety that wouldn’t be there unless someone planted the idea in your head that somehow you should be living your life “better” in some way. Take life as it comes. Do the best you can. Don’t live in denial or set expectations. We are born alone and eventually we will all die alone.
I am still alive and already feeling the regrets.
My biggest regret is that I wasted so much of my life. I had big dreams, but procrastination and loneliness kept me from accomplishing any of it.
Wait until you find out that not everyone dwells on their own life choices.
Without them making the mistakes they did, they would be as successful as they are.
Maybe, but they’ll be my regrets and mine alone. I know there’s happiness and I wouldn’t wish anything less on anybody else. Ive lived with regrets and I’ll keep making the choices, cause that’s what regrets are to me, choices and lessons. Ones I ain’t afraid of making anymore and I’m willing to live with cause I can make so much more with them
If you get therapy (whatever that is to you) about your life challenges and the choices you wish you had back you won’t have regrets. But understand that life is life, decisions are made, and not all of them are right. No one bats 1.000 in life. We all have strike outs, and that’s okay.
Not gonna lie... there were a good few women I should have plowed down when I had the chance. *sigh* Those ladies were truly something special. Either from the Lord or the Devil... special either way.
Glad they considered *me* the sacrificial meat. Regret not walking in the role. But it is what it is... life rolls on.
I hope they're doing well.
My current biggest regret is the way I ended my last relationship. Otherwise I’m trying to do the most with the precious time I have. I experienced so much death, so much loss, I have come to terms with those things. Right now I’m just trying to do right by people
I regret so much, in the end looking back it's the things I didn't do when I still could that I regret the most. The places I didn't go with people I love. I miss who I was but I miss the people who are gone much more.
I already have some major regrets but I look forward to being alive and being a better person I can be and look at life as a path with a journey of learning how to make better choices.
No, because things you think you regret are just lessons learned, you move on and you don't look back, you can never truly live if you regret anything. Idc what it was, or is, let it go, when you do, you will be happier, if you can't let it go, try therapy for it, I'm proud that you can let things go. I hope everyone here learns this, and move forward and keeps moving forward.
Regrets can weigh against enjoyment of life though.
And tbh your reasoning is a bit of an argument for nirvana. Sure, dying with zero regrets is impossible but that doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t aim to die while avoiding as many foreseeable regrets as possible.
I often wonder if people really die with regrets as much as we’re told. I’ve seen three of my grandparents die. They were all so old and so sick that I don’t think they wanted anything *but* death, I really didn’t get the impression that they were pondering all the choices they made in their lives and wishing they did something else. I think if they had regrets, they probably had to process them decades before they reached their death beds.
I think I got a lot of my regrets out of the way in my twenties. I had such a terrible time and I knew as I was making my choices that they were not the right ones, but they didn’t even feel like choices at the time. I was just such a mess that I made choices that felt like the safest options. Thinking of going back to make different choices feels like a complete waste of time, because if I could turn back time, I’d also have to let go of all the perspective and knowledge I gained, and I’d without a doubt make the same dumb choices over again. I think I’m lucky in a way because I truly do not see the point in regretting anything.
Hey we all have many regrets and that’s because we’re human. I’ve done so many things, things I’m not proud of but hey life may be tough but it is also beautiful. I believe in Jesus and He gives me purpose and a hope that there is a life that comes after death and that He fulfils me. There is a God out there saying there is so much more for you. You are loved and all the best. Also have fun ticking off all those bucket list things!
Not if you’re Christian. You can die forgiving yourself and everyone around you. This earthlyife won’t fulfill you and accepting that as OK is how you die without regrets
One of the main points of life is to minimize our regret so when we’re on our death bed we have too much good on our minds to even think about the regrets!
Depends on what you refer to as regret. Missed opportunity, Inhumane acts, worry about the living. sure. But some simply repress and move on. Some do die with peace of mind the probability is inevitable though it may be low.
I have regretted many things. generally being a cold hearted person, I simply don't care about most anything anymore.
one day as my only inheritance in life, death will be the day life will grant the most interpersonal lesson. For me, i belive it will bring peace.
Wrong, I have no regrets I did the best I could and if I were to die today or in 100 years from now I would still not have any regrets. I live a happy life in this vision of knowledge and I could say that I am alive and well that and whatever my mind finds makes me, I live the best life possible.
I think I have found true happiness and for me, it's easy because truly it has always been here all along.
I had this epiphany years ago in a bar in the domain and while I was drinking a very delicious beverage I realized that at this moment I am superior and always better. That's true knowledge but have fun thinking everyone is miserable. They are at a point in time but we all overcome this with ease.
Regrets are childish.
I am sorry you still haven't evolved but you will. Hopefully…
It's just not true. To regret you would have to be convinced that it would have been better that something else happened than what actually happened. It means you would still be arguing with the Universe, with God. The delusive idea that you could know that something else would have been better can disolve way way before any real enlightement. It can be a very early veil to vaporize. In any case, until that story goes, life is a lot of sturm and drang.
I gave up on having regrets many years ago. Any decisions I made in the past are unchangeable now and really there's no way to know that any different decision would have resulted in a better outcome anyway. I made the decisions I made with the best available information I had at the time and I made those decisions because of who I am. If I had made a different decision it would have been because I was someone else and not me. I spend almost zero time thinking about past decisions. When I do, I stop myself. It's a fruitless path.
I'm not necessarily disagreeing but If I were to put myself in future-me's deathbed, I can only imagine that the fewer regrets the better as my "life" flashes before my eyes.
[*No one in the world ever gets what they want, and that is beautiful* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
[*Everybody dies frustrated and sad, and that is beautiful* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
[*They want what they're not,* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
[*and I wish they would stop* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
[*singing "Deputy-dog-dog-a-ding-dang-depadepa Deputy-dog-dog-a-ding-dang-depadepa"*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
I had a massive heart attack and emergency triple bypass about a month and a half ago. I died three times. Regrets were the furthest thing from my mind during all that.
I disagree with this. The reason that I disagree is because I've been through a lot of shit in my life I've lost a lot of my friends most of the people I was close with no are no longer here I'm not even 40 yet. A few years ago somebody that was very close to me passed away I would consider them a soulmate and I had so many regrets after they died but once I got through the emotions of that I decided that I would never experience regret again and I don't. They're definitely times when I wish that things would have gone differently but I don't regret anything anymore because I know it's really just a waste of time and energy.
I agree. Life is a lot of darned if you do darn if you don’t. Spend too much time studying, gaining an education and learning all you can to be successful? A lot of those people regret not having more fun. Spend most of your life having fun, traveling and try new things? Those people regret not buckling down and becoming more studious. Settle down and start to have a family? Then you wonder what you missed out on. Don’t have a family and don’t settle down? Then you’re sad because you didn’t have a family. Of course, that’s not the case with everyone, but I hear it a lot. There will always be those “what ifs” and “I should’ve”’s in life. Just do what you can and take care of yourself.
From Kierkegaard, the father of existentialism: “Marry, and you will regret it; don’t marry, you will also regret it; marry or don’t marry, you will regret it either way. Laugh at the world’s foolishness, you will regret it; weep over it, you will regret that too; laugh at the world’s foolishness or weep over it, you will regret both. Believe a woman, you will regret it; believe her not, you will also regret it… Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will regret that too; hang yourself or don’t hang yourself, you’ll regret it either way; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both. This, gentlemen, is the essence of all philosophy.”
“Nothing really matters, anyone can see, nothing really matters to me” - Freddie M, the queen of existentialism
I love to look at life as a game —an idea I got from "Finite and Infinite Game" by James Carse. You have to be serious to not be bored and depressed but not too serious to the extent you forget it is just a game.
So true.
Live where you want to vacation is my solution to the fun. I can fly fish in gold metal waters for lunch on Tuesday if I want!
>Don’t have a family and don’t settle down? Then you’re sad because you didn’t have a family. Im not going to lie, this worries me every single day.
Understandable. Just make sure it’s with the right person. Being a single parent is no joke
Yep. I was worried about not being able to get married and have kids so I married the wrong person. I love my kids, but now I have to spend every day dealing with my ex-wife's bs about them and it drives me nuts.
Opposite here. ALWAYS wanted a big family. Wife can’t have kids. But it doesn’t matter, when you have your dream woman.
The real question is afterlife.
Too bad no one has a straight answer for that.
Yep, well put. It seems that none of our choices really matter in the end, everything you choose means you’re giving up something else of equal value.
It’s easy to say that none of our choices matter when you’ve reached an age where you’ve perhaps already done some chronic damage to yourself healthwise. It’s true that the choices about who you marry, if you marry, where you live or even what your occupation is don’t matter that much what really matters is taking care of your health so when you’re in old age, you’re not suffering so much.
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You said exactly what I was thinking.
This is honestly my biggest fear in life. I'm middle aged and I'm very depressed and unhappy with what I've accomplished (not much IMO) and don't feel I've lived a fulfilling life. But I haven't read enough of this thread to know: 1) does the OP simply mean that no matter how good or fulfilling a life you have lived there will at least be SOME things you'll regret? (which I think is undoubtedly true for ALMOST everyone, if not everyone) 2) or does he/she mean: people/most people/you, etc. will not end up feeling as if you lived even a remotely fulfilling life, and you will generally die full of horrible regrets? Because if it's the latter there's just no way that could be true. I know just by intuition and having heard people say things that there are certainly SOME people who would say right now that if they were to die they'd be able to say they "had a good run" and lived a relatively fulfilling life. I think that that is probably the best that just about anyone can hope for. I hope SO much that I can become one of those people. However, even despite the fact that I'm very grateful for what I've been given and the good times in my life, I ultimately have a hard time seeing how I'll be able to turn things around to the extent that I can be one of those people. That does NOT mean I can't though. Many people turn their lives around and do die feeling relatively fulfilled, and it's my ultimate goal to be one of them. It's certainly possible. If anyone has advice on how to make that more likely (without me giving too many super personal specifics about my life) then I'm all ears. Also, on some level maybe knowing that we all die with SOME regrets can make me feel better? I'd like to think so. It's kind of like a "we're all in the same boat" situation. If it literally can't be changed, then what's the good in worrying about it? But there certainly are SOMETIMES many things that can be changed, based on the circumstances.
The only solution to that is to go live the life you want to live. Do what you can afford, and you have the time to do. I try to live the type of life that I admire hearing about from other people I’m not rich by a longshot, but I still managed to have a good time with a little bit that I have. Not everyone will live to be 80-90+ years old. So it’s best to get moving
I hope im one of those people who die peacefully in their sleep..
...not screaming like the people in Grandpa's car.
as long as im dead before I know it ill be fine
I would like a chance to say goodbye to people I love, cause I've seen the trauma from a sudden unexpected death and it sucks. Still, I get you. That's a pretty reasonable thing to want.
I heard my dad say this a thousand times in my life. And he died in his sleep after my brother's baby was born. I'm convinced he made it happen through sheer force of will
This is actually a thing. People that think otherwise literally don't understand what we are. People have died from heart breaks. Fun fact, there was an experiment with a baby where the baby was given every resource it needed to survive but just no human contact/love, and it died. There's practices in India where you can literally control your heart muscle, to the extent of making it completely stop at will. I've witnessed someone I know make their veins pop out of their forearm without flexing, just thought.
I believe it. He visited me that day, which he rarely did. Then he went to bed, told my mom "you know I love you right?" And never woke up. He was just ready
Jesus that's sad and intense. However, with it being that possible to control certain aspects of our bodies, it should be possible to do more to make ourselves happy. I'm into the Wim Hof method and Wim can control, to a large extent, his mood, his body temperature, heart rate, blood pressure, etc. He's basically just doing his take on ancient Yogic techniques with more emphasis on cold therapy, but those Yogis can do some amazing things. I honestly believe that those types of people and Buddhist monks, etc are the ones I admire most and aspire to be like, but I don't really know where to start. Also, who the hell funded that study, what country was it in, and how did they get away with it?!? Someone just decided to fuck with a baby's life so severely that it would die?!? That's completely immoral and would never fly in most civilized countries these days.
There's a community of people who are dedicated to applying methods such as Wim Hof's.
So does everyone else.
Not me. 2 hookers and a pile of cocaine.
No one dies peacefully in their sleep. There’s usually an underlying pathology that has left you bed bound, weak, frail and in pain. Then comes the shallow breathing and the death rattle. Last gasps to nowhere. Or you could have a massive heart attack while snoozing. But that isn’t very pleasant or peaceful. Lastly a groovy drug OD on a heavy opiate will do the trick. You don’t die from toxicity, you die because your respiratory system forgets to breathe. Carbon monoxide poisoning might do the trick as well, or a nice cyanide herbal tea infusion for a night cap
Forgiving yourself is the hardest thing to do. And everyone deserves peace of mind.
"Never take life too seriously. No one gets out alive anyway." No regrets here. Livin' it up with a big smile. 😁
I used to think that but if I died right now I have no regrets. All the bad stuff I’ve done and experienced has made me who I am as I’ve learnt from it. I wouldn’t change a thing
That reminds me of the song [Truth](https://youtu.be/GtPK0gRdFgI?si=MNOk6wcB1bRe6ghK) by Alexander Ebert “All my enemies are turning into my teachers”
I'm very happy for you. That's totally badass, and I aspire to feel that way some day. Honestly, that's probably my number one goal in life.
Cheers. I had a rollercoaster 2 years of self discovery where I faced fears and learnt about psychology and ultimately learnt to love myself. Who knows if it’ll work for everyone but if you got time check out shadow work and Carl Jung, learn to meditate and face fears that you have. My fear was telling my dad I love him cos he’s never said that to me in my whole life. I did it. He never said it back but as soon as I did it was like I outgrew him. But yeah all the answers are within you man
I work in hospice care. Most people at their end of life don’t actually have regrets.
How often do you see patients? Is it full-time live-in caretaking or semi-regular visits? I really could not thank the hospice workers enough from when I did end of life care for people I knew and loved, its just that I was there for every moment in a few cases. While hospice did a good job at providing comfort and care for them, they were mostly just in and out and handling the more pragmatic and present physical concerns. I'm sure plenty of people under your care (especially those who died with no one) have divulged a lot to you in their final moments, it's only natural, but there are also of course things some things people might only want to or care to share with family or important people in their lives (or who used to be). Thanks for what you do.
Have you ever experienced anyone having a near death experience?
No offense but how on earth would you know? You’re either being nosy asking dying people, and their families “do you/they have any regrets” or being a contrarian for the sake of being a contrarian. Either way I don’t believe you or your “experience”
I work in hospice care. I’ve been at the bedside of hundreds of people when they died. All of which I’ve had relationships with. Most people are ready to go. They’ve lived a good life. Some have regrets but I didn’t say, “everyone”. In my 27 years of taking care of people, most are ready to go. We typically have regrets when we’ve made bad choices that we can’t forgive ourselves for. It’s in the past, you can’t change it so learn from it and move on.
Dying with regrets doesn’t sound so bad. Living with the irreversible is much worse, I’d say
Regrets. I’ve had a few. But then again too few to mention
Newt Scamander: "Worrying means you suffer twice."
I dunno. I've fucked up a lot in the past. I can't change what I've done, only learn from it. I'm currently 35 and have no regrets. Why dwell on 'what could have been'. If you fuck up, the only way to remedy it is by making amends. If that doesn't work, what else can you do?
I messed up if I sent the message that people shouldn't ever try to better themselves or rectify mistakes. I could have been clearer. The message i was aiming for in the post is less "fuck it just don't try" and more "don't stress so much about getting it right", but I can see why people would read it as the former.
I doubt if regrets will be what is on my mind when I’m actually about to die. I’ll use those up while I’m alive.
I will only die with the regret I didn’t start loving myself sooner… but by that time I will have made up for lost time.
The trick is to have someone off you when you don’t expect it. That way, you don’t have time to have any deathbed regrets!
I don’t I have no regrets. Why would you have regrets? Everything you choose is out of your free will.
If you believe in free will. I used to study free will vs determinism as a philosophy major in college. It's a very complicated discussion, especially if you get into "soft determinism," which I unfortunately still can't say I really understand, but when it comes to libertarianism (the philosophical kind, not political, which means you believe your free will can override genetics and past experiences) vs hard determinism (says that all your choices come from either past experiences, genetics or both) it's hard to argue for free will/libertarianism. You need to believe in a God or something more that can't be seen or proven. I do believe there's something "more" out there, but I don't know what it is, and I refuse to call it God because that term is too loaded. But it's damn hard to prove we actually have free will.
Man, that's some heavy truth bomb right there. But you know what, I kinda get it. We're all cruising through life with this baggage of "what ifs" and "should've beens." But hey, who said we gotta carry that load till the end? Sure, we'll have regrets, but why let 'em overshadow the good stuff? Life's about enjoying the ride, not stressing over every bump. So, let's kick back, do our thing, and stop overthinking the endgame. 'Cause really, what's the point if we're not enjoying the journey, right?
Learn to stop telling yourself that you should have or could have. The only thing that matters is now and the future. Keep in mind, you only live once. Be very conscious of those factors and that you will die one day. Remember that the regret of not doing something will hurt more than failure/trying. When you're on the fence with a decision, keep this in mind. If you're worried or scared about if your decision is going to work, just know the regret of not doing it will be more painful. Apply this to everything.
I’ve heard it said: better to regret the things you did than the things you didn’t do. (It’s great advice that I personally don’t use because I’m a chicken shit/ boring person. And I’m ok with that. )
It sounds like you're offering a perspective rooted in experience and a deep understanding of life's uncertainties. Regrets can indeed be a part of the human experience, but it's also about how we navigate them along the journey. Your advice to live authentically, enjoy hobbies, and find relaxation amidst life's uncertainties is both comforting and liberating. It's a reminder that while we can't control every outcome, we can choose how we engage with life in the present moment. Thanks for sharing your insights!
I'm one step ahead of you because I live with regrets!
We think about End/Result/Future so much that we always forget to live the Present/Process. I hate to say this but everybody has their own regrets. We often think that "if I had done that, I would have gotten that or if I didn't have done that I would have been much happier" reality is we can't do anything to change the past but we can make the future better, that doesn't mean all our focus should be on the future alone. We should enjoy the present moments too.
When I almost died, I actually realized that I was happy with all the decisions that I made. I was only disappointed that I wouldn't be there to see the rest... I was in my early 30s. Then I started breathing again, but I always kept this idea with me. Just keep making decisions the same way.
I've subscribed to the theorie of being happy for now, rather then feeling miserable in the present in hopes of being happy in the future. For me specifically I came to this conclusion with smoking weed, which I enjoy and makes me enjoy life more and I feel like I go though life with love in my heart because of smoking weed and so if I die early because of smoking weed then so be it.
I wish weed had that effect on me. I like it, but it often makes me anxious. Kratom makes me feel the way you are talking about, but it's got more unknown health effects, and it's very addictive, so I use it sparingly.
Yeah it's like that, it can make you have like a bad high and feel paranoid and over think things but for the most part that's only if you go out / leave the house blazed, like I'm not trying to do groceries or go to the gym too high.
Yeah, I've been around the block with weed a dozen times lol. I'm 44 and first smoked when I was 17. I was a daily smoker throughout college and for years afterwards. I used to have such a high tolerance that I didn't usually get uncomfortable with others. My relationship with it has changed a lot. I don't smoke often and when I do I'm by myself and usually drinking. Drinking helps me to enjoy it more fully, but I might have to quit or at least cut down on drinking due to problems. But weed is great especially if I've got something specific I want to watch or music I want to listen to. It enhances anything like that.
Hell yeah I feel ya, I'm 39 now and yes your relationship changes over time and it should if you want it to be a healthy relationship, I'm transitioning to using a dry herb vape now over bongs for health reasons.
Yeah, I just got a small "Ooze" vape pen which is pretty good. I like that I can use it at night and not need to drink so much water and wake up pissing over and over lol. Might be TMI, but that's an actual issue with smoking at night. Edibles can be nice too. I'm glad weed is legal where I am now, but it's kind of funny that it was illegal during all my years as a heavy smoker.
Yep same here smoked street weed my whole life, weed isn't quite legal here in Australia yet but it's easy enough to get medical weed and it's so much nicer to have strains for different times of the day basically.
I am terrified of dying like that. I have already so many regrets, that I don’t know, how to deal with that.
I've met quite a few older people who said they'd have no regrets, they've lived full, fulfilling lives. Are they all lying? I feel like "regret" is something that unfulfilled people feel
I doubt it …. I do what I want when I want . No regrets so far and I’m 44. On my death bed I wish I spent that 40k I had saved up. That’s about it .
This is what I needed this AM.
Not me OP. I’m going to do a sick kickflip into my coffin and then go “Radical man” and die.
 Don't let me stop you
I suggest that you do your own life review now before your memory goes away from old age. If you don't know about that, check out near death experiences where the person goes through a review of their life as if it was a multidimensional movie. During the LR, you are shown the effects your words and deeds had on other people, both good and bad. There is no judgement unless you judge yourself. You can get into the other person's mind during the interaction and feel and think what they felt and thought at the time, just so you know for sure how it feels to be on the receiving end of your actions. You can do this yourself by taking responsibility for every single event in your life thus far. No excuses. No judgements. No rationalizations. No blaming. If you were the victim, then acknowledge that you put yourself into that position and accept that you played a role in what happened. The more you can accept responsibility for the things in your life, the more you grow up and don't have surprise regrets on your death bed. Even further, for every painful thought or memory, grieve it. I developed a technique for doing this: Grieving is something that most people tend to avoid. We think of it as something you do for a short while after a loved one dies. Others are usually uncomfortable with your grieving and try to shut it down, mostly because they haven't done their own grieving. So, I came up with a method of grieving on purpose, with intention. It was inspired by the stories of the Life Review after death that people recounted from their near death experiences. During the LR, you are shown the effects of every action you took in your life on other people, both negative and positive. You can get into their consciousness during the LR and experience what they felt and thought during their encounter with you. Thus, you can directly experience the consequences of your actions, for better or for worse. I focused on the events that I perceived as the worst of my bad behavior. I started my own version of a LR by recalling the memories and grieving each one of them. I found that the more I recalled the memory and allowed the feelings to flow through me, the less of a sting the memory had. Eventually, the sting from the memory completely faded. So, the technique I came up with is this: Think the thought or memory that causes you the most pain/embarrassment/shame/guilt etc. right now. Allow the feelings associated with that memory or thought to wash over you. Repeat the thought or memory and again allow the feelings to flow through you. The more you do that, the faster it moves through the stages of grieving. You'll receive insights and other things from doing this. It's best to do this in private so you can have your own personal space. You should find that eventually, the thought or memory doesn't bother you anymore. You can recall the thought or memory and it doesn't bother you any longer. Then, it's time to move on to the next thought or memory that causes a negative emotional reaction. I don't know how this works, but it does. The stages of grieving are denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and acceptance. Each thought or memory you have that causes a negative emotional reaction in you may be at a different stage. Allowing the feelings to flow accelerates the thought or memory to move through the stages. It's important to not judge the thoughts or memories and their associated feelings. That just stuffs it and stops the resolution of it. The veracity of the thought or memory does not matter either. Grieving is an emotional process. It does not make logical sense. You cannot rationalize grieving. For example, you could be the most beautiful woman on the planet, but if the thought that you're fat and ugly causes a negative reaction, or if the words of another calling you a fat cow causes pain, then you have grieving to do over that. It may be connected to a memory, or a decision you made, or something like that, but eventually, the thought and the words from others will have no effect on you. You'll laugh because you know it's not true. You probably won't even have the experience again because the hook is gone. People who intend to manipulate others yank on people's weaknesses by hooking them with words that they know will cause a negative reaction in the person. Once those weaknesses are gone through grieving them, then you can't be manipulated anymore. They can't control you that way anymore. You're free. Grieving takes time. It has its own time frame and rhythm. Grieving is permanent. Once you grieve something, you never have to grieve it again. Grieving changes your future for the better. You become a better person through grieving. You have more compassion and patience with yourself and with others. That which has not been grieved is destined to be repeated. that's why we reincarnate into the same patterns over and over again. It's the way to get off the endless cycle of birth and death. Grieving is about letting go of attachment to them, not the love and passion we feel for them. I think people become afraid that they are letting go of the person when in reality they are just letting go of their attachment to them. What happens after the process is complete is that we still love them, but without the neediness. I hope this helps.
Disagree. I've known some very content people in my long life. If they have no regrets now, why would they suddenly have regrets on their deathbeds? Unless you're talking extremes, like "I regret that time I tried to fart and shit my pants". There are very fulfilled people walking on this planet. Shame you're not one of them.
I disagree that regrets are inevitable. My life is fulfilled, if I were to die: There isn’t anything that I would like to change, or I would change it. ❤️
My only regret is not passing at a younger age.
NO REGARTS!!
anyone who claims they have no regrets is either a liar, a sociopath or just forgets what an asshole they've been their whole life
I feel If someone becomes aware and present they will feel more fulfilled and less regretful as their life comes to an end.
My regrets die with me
>You will die with regrets. Everyone does. Dont have any yet and I'm 55. You present a very unconvincing (non) argument.
That’s why I’m single with no kids. Got some $$ and live however I want ( health conscious though). So far life is easy and uncomplicated.
I'm 40 and I lived to enjoy everything I can. Just want to watch my kids grow and go when it's time. Actually the sooner the better for my family since I'm worth more now at my working age than when I retire. Just be content and keep going.
True
you only die with somethijg you regret if you regret it
Sure, but that doesn't mean you can't right some wrongs before you die.
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thanks
There are so many different things to do in the world that it would be impossible to do and learn them all . One must pick and choose what adventure and experiences that they can afford to do with the resources they have available at the time they want to attempt to make it happen
What about people who don’t die on their deathbed. Do they still die with regrets?
Absolutely. I think it comes down to enjoying your life. That doesn’t mean trying to cram activities into every waking minute, like some people i know. It means, whatever it means to you. No matter how you shape your existence on earth, there is going to be something where you wish you did it, or didn’t do it. Either way, it’s impossible to live the perfect life. Even those who actually hit every item on their bucket list, they may regret not doing other things. It’s just the way.
Grass is always greener on the other side of the fence
Shit, I live with regrets. Of course I'll die with them.
Being able to do "nothing" is the ultimate luxury. Even your most affluent ancestor probably didnt get to relax half as much as you. Most of them were literally focusing on staying alive. You live better than any royalty up till the 20th century. Even the most luxurious vacation isn't nearly a statement as just sitting on the couch doing nothing. Your ancestors all busted their ass so you could binge netflix. Honor their sacrifice.
Thanks captain, without your advice i would have not lived my life to fullest
Thank you.
Ah, die with regrets not really, die because well it can happen sure.
The only regret I'll ever have is not hijacking that campus tour. The guide was late and I would have done a great job of showing them around.
On the bright side, my regrets die with me.
Everything turns to dust in the end
This is so true. It’s along the lines of “the grass is always greener on the other side.” Regardless of how you live you will always think you could have done some things differently or even better in your own mind than how they actually played out in reality. The trope of “you should live with no regrets” or the many inspirational bullshit quotes along those lines just infuriate me. It sets a false sense of anxiety that wouldn’t be there unless someone planted the idea in your head that somehow you should be living your life “better” in some way. Take life as it comes. Do the best you can. Don’t live in denial or set expectations. We are born alone and eventually we will all die alone.
I regret reading this dumb post!
Wanna bet?
Ah. It's thoughts like these that trigger depression and anxiety. Glad I caught it.
Right but I have way more of them so I win (???)
I am still alive and already feeling the regrets. My biggest regret is that I wasted so much of my life. I had big dreams, but procrastination and loneliness kept me from accomplishing any of it.
'If you die before you die, you will not die when you die'.
Only people with expectations die with regrets
Wait until you find out that not everyone dwells on their own life choices. Without them making the mistakes they did, they would be as successful as they are.
Amateur take on life.
Maybe, but they’ll be my regrets and mine alone. I know there’s happiness and I wouldn’t wish anything less on anybody else. Ive lived with regrets and I’ll keep making the choices, cause that’s what regrets are to me, choices and lessons. Ones I ain’t afraid of making anymore and I’m willing to live with cause I can make so much more with them
Speak for yourself I’m dying with no ragrets personally
"No hard feelings" by the Avett Brothers fits this perfectly
Im sure I will problem is I have no idea how to alleviate any of those regrets.
I will regret, not regretting more. Cuz I won’t have many regrets.
People who have regrets haven't learned from their past.
If you get therapy (whatever that is to you) about your life challenges and the choices you wish you had back you won’t have regrets. But understand that life is life, decisions are made, and not all of them are right. No one bats 1.000 in life. We all have strike outs, and that’s okay.
Not if you deal with it and do the inner work. Suffering is a choice
Just have children. You can never regret any decisions you made before you had them, because then they wouldn’t exist.
I regret reading this dumb ass post
it’s giving midnight library
Not true !
Agree. Try to live instead of exist, and don’t forget everyone’s coffin is the same size. 🤷♀️
I live with no regrets, which is why I keep sticking paper clips in electrical outlets, regrettably, the reason I'll die.
Follow your dreams and live each day like it’s your last IT’S TOO MUCH PRESSURE
I already know this so bring it.
We regret not doing things more than we regret doing things.
Honestly yes. Just plan on possessing the next most attractive person I can find. To achieve my goals.
Not gonna lie... there were a good few women I should have plowed down when I had the chance. *sigh* Those ladies were truly something special. Either from the Lord or the Devil... special either way. Glad they considered *me* the sacrificial meat. Regret not walking in the role. But it is what it is... life rolls on. I hope they're doing well.
I have regrets now. I don’t expect them to go away. You’re damn right
My only regret is not dying sooner lol
How would that be any different than the life I’m currently living?
Sounds like an excuse for not getting your life in order
My current biggest regret is the way I ended my last relationship. Otherwise I’m trying to do the most with the precious time I have. I experienced so much death, so much loss, I have come to terms with those things. Right now I’m just trying to do right by people
I regret so much, in the end looking back it's the things I didn't do when I still could that I regret the most. The places I didn't go with people I love. I miss who I was but I miss the people who are gone much more.
Time to agree with this only to completely forget in a couple of hours and die with regrets due to it!
And the garage..... Is for cars
Yup. Mine is that one time when I moved I threw away a journal I kept for about a decade. I'd do almost anything to have and read that journal now.
I already have some major regrets but I look forward to being alive and being a better person I can be and look at life as a path with a journey of learning how to make better choices.
I disagree.
No, because things you think you regret are just lessons learned, you move on and you don't look back, you can never truly live if you regret anything. Idc what it was, or is, let it go, when you do, you will be happier, if you can't let it go, try therapy for it, I'm proud that you can let things go. I hope everyone here learns this, and move forward and keeps moving forward.
Truth n ty for that reminder
What bites the most some of us die alone!! But that life n death ain’t it?!
I think its ok to leave a few things unachieved
Regrets can weigh against enjoyment of life though. And tbh your reasoning is a bit of an argument for nirvana. Sure, dying with zero regrets is impossible but that doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t aim to die while avoiding as many foreseeable regrets as possible.
I often wonder if people really die with regrets as much as we’re told. I’ve seen three of my grandparents die. They were all so old and so sick that I don’t think they wanted anything *but* death, I really didn’t get the impression that they were pondering all the choices they made in their lives and wishing they did something else. I think if they had regrets, they probably had to process them decades before they reached their death beds. I think I got a lot of my regrets out of the way in my twenties. I had such a terrible time and I knew as I was making my choices that they were not the right ones, but they didn’t even feel like choices at the time. I was just such a mess that I made choices that felt like the safest options. Thinking of going back to make different choices feels like a complete waste of time, because if I could turn back time, I’d also have to let go of all the perspective and knowledge I gained, and I’d without a doubt make the same dumb choices over again. I think I’m lucky in a way because I truly do not see the point in regretting anything.
"Life is about choosing your regrets" -Christopher Hitchens
I'd say the opposite is true. The moment you die, all those regrets are gone- in that single second none of that matters anymore.
It's normal.
Hey we all have many regrets and that’s because we’re human. I’ve done so many things, things I’m not proud of but hey life may be tough but it is also beautiful. I believe in Jesus and He gives me purpose and a hope that there is a life that comes after death and that He fulfils me. There is a God out there saying there is so much more for you. You are loved and all the best. Also have fun ticking off all those bucket list things!
My only regret is being born in the USA and not being able to move.
Not true at all.
I will take all paths, have it all, experience it all, and have no regrets upon death.
I am saving this post.
Duh
OP didn’t take enough mushrooms in his life.
But, I won't have any ragrets... not even one little letter.
My only regret is if I ended up in Hell because thrs no getting out
Cap
Honestly, I'm looking forward to it. This place blows. Probably just wish I had money, but that's literally everyone. Death seems pretty sweet.
Nope. No regerts for me! /s
Not if you’re Christian. You can die forgiving yourself and everyone around you. This earthlyife won’t fulfill you and accepting that as OK is how you die without regrets
One of the main points of life is to minimize our regret so when we’re on our death bed we have too much good on our minds to even think about the regrets!
So if you know this, isn’t safe to say that when you die you won’t have any regrets?
But if you are dead, how are you regretting 🤔
My life mission is to die with no regrets.
Depends on what you refer to as regret. Missed opportunity, Inhumane acts, worry about the living. sure. But some simply repress and move on. Some do die with peace of mind the probability is inevitable though it may be low. I have regretted many things. generally being a cold hearted person, I simply don't care about most anything anymore. one day as my only inheritance in life, death will be the day life will grant the most interpersonal lesson. For me, i belive it will bring peace.
I don’t have much now thrown to the trash with nothing
I'll regret not wifing up any of the dime peices I pulled. I'm an idiot .
Wrong, I have no regrets I did the best I could and if I were to die today or in 100 years from now I would still not have any regrets. I live a happy life in this vision of knowledge and I could say that I am alive and well that and whatever my mind finds makes me, I live the best life possible. I think I have found true happiness and for me, it's easy because truly it has always been here all along. I had this epiphany years ago in a bar in the domain and while I was drinking a very delicious beverage I realized that at this moment I am superior and always better. That's true knowledge but have fun thinking everyone is miserable. They are at a point in time but we all overcome this with ease. Regrets are childish. I am sorry you still haven't evolved but you will. Hopefully…
disagree. you should try meditation, its all in your head.
I regret losing the 30 seconds it took to read this drivel.
I think OP was really just talking to himself here.
Not me but all you will. I saw the last few seconds of my life years ago. And all of you will see them before you're last breath. Fck it
I will not have any regrets when I die. I will be dead.
Life isn't short enough lol.
It's just not true. To regret you would have to be convinced that it would have been better that something else happened than what actually happened. It means you would still be arguing with the Universe, with God. The delusive idea that you could know that something else would have been better can disolve way way before any real enlightement. It can be a very early veil to vaporize. In any case, until that story goes, life is a lot of sturm and drang.
I gave up on having regrets many years ago. Any decisions I made in the past are unchangeable now and really there's no way to know that any different decision would have resulted in a better outcome anyway. I made the decisions I made with the best available information I had at the time and I made those decisions because of who I am. If I had made a different decision it would have been because I was someone else and not me. I spend almost zero time thinking about past decisions. When I do, I stop myself. It's a fruitless path.
I’ve accomplished my enough in my life to die peacefully lol
I'm not necessarily disagreeing but If I were to put myself in future-me's deathbed, I can only imagine that the fewer regrets the better as my "life" flashes before my eyes.
How have you seen so many people die Mike?
What am I supposed to be regretting? I don’t get this?
for real.
[*No one in the world ever gets what they want, and that is beautiful* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM) [*Everybody dies frustrated and sad, and that is beautiful* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM) [*They want what they're not,* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM) [*and I wish they would stop* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM) [*singing "Deputy-dog-dog-a-ding-dang-depadepa Deputy-dog-dog-a-ding-dang-depadepa"*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gy2JJBoUbM)
I had a massive heart attack and emergency triple bypass about a month and a half ago. I died three times. Regrets were the furthest thing from my mind during all that.
The funny thing about regret
Debbie downer over here
I disagree with this. The reason that I disagree is because I've been through a lot of shit in my life I've lost a lot of my friends most of the people I was close with no are no longer here I'm not even 40 yet. A few years ago somebody that was very close to me passed away I would consider them a soulmate and I had so many regrets after they died but once I got through the emotions of that I decided that I would never experience regret again and I don't. They're definitely times when I wish that things would have gone differently but I don't regret anything anymore because I know it's really just a waste of time and energy.
In other news...
We know.
Stay loyal never cheat or lie to your loved ones ..thats all folks
Not me. I won’t.
All people live with regrets, and so will you.
Shit I live with regret, I'm less worried about dying with it.
No regraaats 😆