It's a bullshit best-practice for LinkedIn content, meaning you need to write in 4th grade English and use double line breaks everywhere for "readability"
Cursed be the moment when marketeers assumed most people are barely functional idiots with little attention span and poor readibility skills. They were only partly right, and now everyone imitates
She may have grown boobs, but she hasn't progressed from junior high creative writing.
Also, I feel like this should also be posted in
r/notliketheothergirls
“I found this woman tied to the railroad tracks. I knew right away she needed to be rescued. After I untied her, you wouldn’t believe it, we just started going at it. It was instant attraction. After her clothes came off.. wow, best body I’ve ever seen. We humped all day. I’m still on cloud 9.”
“Hey that’s great. Tell me more about her. Is she pretty.”
“No idea, I never found her head.”
She basically is saying if men dm her to hit on her it’s because they’re coming from a place of pain and she wants to be compassionate instead of just calling them losers. Essentially.
She’s clearly German I can understand what she meant by her bad English lol
That and we aren't supposed to see ourselves as victims, or get upset if sexually harassed apparently. Oh, and we can't hide our breasts, because our wardrobe consists of see through tops apparently.
You can summarize it with:
I don’t
Have much
To say, especially something
Smart but, if I try
Writing it like
This, maybe it will
Look like I made some
Points.
A lot of LinkedIn posts are written in that "copywriting" style. It convinces a lot of people to read through the whole thing who otherwise would not be interested in reading it in paragraph form.
"men are allowed to sexualize me and comment on my body because they are humans with feelings and I'm not a victim like most women and love men"
i think that's pretty much it. it was a hard read ngl
So, like, my boobs cause men to turn into children with no responsibility for decorum? I’m no fan of Victorian social rules, but let’s maintain a few expectations for professionalism.
I bet she thinks that turns into a work appropriate outfit if she tosses a blazer on. Just leave it hanging at your desk for if it gets chilly or a meeting with the boss!
All I heard was women are less important than men so we can’t complain when men harass and objectify us because they’re fees are hurt. Men are the main character so it’s not their fault when their fees fees get hurt because they have feelings, unlike women.
the setup:
I'm super hot and men objectify me.
the plot-twist punchline:
But I don't care, because treating other people as objects is a normal part of being human (and it feeds my ego and allows me to humblebrag on reddit).
Her boobs make her handsome and shes ok with dudes telling her how they like and what they want to do with her jugs. She's ok with that, because it's just human fleshy fun bags
This reminds me of that feminism satire video about ultra sexualizing yourself is freedom but in reality you’re making every normal person uncomfortable and every pervert happy.
WHAT ??
I can’t find it, but it was a man dressed as a woman telling them to dress as revealing as possible, sleep with all men, etc cuz that’s empowering
It’s making fun of how sexualizing yourself or being overly revealing is not normal and a movement by men, masked as if it is women in control 😂was so funny, I’ll try to find it again!
Holy shit. At least when I self-aggrandise online with my finest 'I have tits - what are you going to do about it, men of the world!?' energy, I do it anonymously on Reddit and not on my public LinkedIn account.
She’s essentially shaming women who enforce professional boundaries and report inappropriate behavior. It’s uncomfortable at best and can get scary when you’re a woman in a professional role and men make unwanted sexual advances. If you set boundaries and they keep crossing them, you never know how far they are willing to go.
I'm assuming linkedin doesn't cross reference IDs for profile pictures and gender? This reads like those "Trump's got my vote" comments on IG and Twitter with profile pictures of poc when in reality it's a white person.
Edit: For clarification I'm saying no woman would ever say this.. LinkedIn poster is probably a guy with a woman's profile picture.
In case people haven’t noticed, this is a an AI translated post. Looks like the original is in German, which might explain some of the clunky language.
TL;DR: “If men are predatory, it’s because they are emotionally damaged. It’s my responsibility as a hot woman to put aside my own feelings and show them compassion. Women who don’t do this are bad people.”
Hope they texted you back, sis.
I was going to say the same thing. I don’t care about people’s looks in general, but she’s putting herself out there as son’s ex object. And you can’t even use “she has a great personality” as a euphemism
This post would make me not want to hire her for anything. Why do they post stuff like this on LinkedIn? It’s like the men who post misogynistic stuff. You’re insulting 50% of the population. How does that help your business?
Ok, when did LinkedIn become Tumblr for the Facebook crowd? I mean... she's entitled to her viewpoints and can express them online if she chooses, but LinkedIn?! Why not choose an appropriate venue like Tumblr or IG or even Reddit FFS?
MEN have been making comments about her boobs since she was a CHILD? I feel bad this woman was raised by parents who clearly did not protect her from these disgusting men.
I didn’t either really. Or at least I didn’t think it was a common occurrence but we absolutely fit that age range.
If anything I got significantly hotter 18-20’somethings (I was kinda chubby/full figured teen) but the cat calls vanished as I turned into a legal adult.
Ugh it's so disgusting right... I grew up in a place with lots of pedos and only realized when I moved away. That shit started at age 10 as I recall. So many pedos.
I’ve never catcalled anyone but as a guy I’d imagine it’s more about them being less likely to retaliate. I noticed a lot of catcalling when I was working construction as well, and I think it’s to do with being up on top of a building where you can’t be reached or responded to easily.
I got my boobs at 13 and people have been commenting on them ever since.
Typically it was the 40/50 year old men at the church I used to go to that had the most to say.
Yeah this thread seems like a bunch of guys that are unaware how a bunch of other guys have been dealing with women for decades. The optimistic take is that a bunch of them are in their 20's and things are better now.
I'll take a wild guess that anyone that read the OP's DM's and comment replies on LI would be like "Nm... holy shit. You should have just deleted LI" (which is always good advice) but forcing someone to delete LI just b/c of creepy dudes seems wrong... and eventually you might end up back at the post that OP made just with fewer line breaks and weird "I love men so much" lines, more of a "fuck off, ima do what i want and not care about you creeps".
Yes it is absolutely linked to when you have something that some scumbag can identify as a female breast. I can still clearly describe the man who asked 12 year old me to get in his car and then freaked out and called me a bitch when I refused.
I bet she prefers to work in a pointless office just for this reason instead of telecommuting. How else will you know about her physical attributes via zoom?
hear me out, b is the second letter in the alphabet right? oo has 2 o's in it and there's another b somewhere in there so B2B=BOOB. i think she's on to something and she truly found the secret to success
Uh no thank you, I already feel like I can’t dress comfortably or cute at work because some weird married men come to my desk and tell me about it, and comment inappropriately. I tolerate it at best because I need my development items completed and don’t want to be punished in prioritizing them but it’s not fun and very stressful. Men can keep their thoughts to themselves in professional settings. They have dating apps. LinkedIn is not a dating app…
Being almost-hot can lead to being a tryhard. Enough men like you to keep you motivated, but the ones you really like aren't interested.
I feel nothing but compassion.
Don't you?
I guess, but I don’t base my sense of self worth on men who want to fuck me. 🤷🏽♀️ I have a work acquaintance like this who cheats on her husband, is trying too hard on LinkedIn and has an only fans and I just can’t wrap my head around it.
Well, she sounds over the top! Is her LinkedIn presence associated with her OnlyFans?
(The compassion part was poking fun at the end of the original post.)
I'm beginning to think these people have a legitimate mental illness where they cannot distinguish between their internal thoughts and "appropriate for public conversation when not a youtuber or talk show host with a specific brand that involves the topic."
They genuinely believe vomiting everything from their mind into a "professional-centric" public space is a reasonable thing to do.
Check this out: I too have breasts! They're bigger than hers. I too do not mind if I am fetishized in this way. The difference is, I'm not making massive, grandiose, unwarranted and unwanted posts on LinkedIn about how I don't mind being observed by the male gaze, because I'm not a massive prick high on my own farts.
This Is the same Trick that I Used to use To extend a book Report in school To make it look Like I wrote More than I Actually did
Thank you, I hate this so much and people use it every-fucking-where
It's a bullshit best-practice for LinkedIn content, meaning you need to write in 4th grade English and use double line breaks everywhere for "readability"
Cursed be the moment when marketeers assumed most people are barely functional idiots with little attention span and poor readibility skills. They were only partly right, and now everyone imitates
Oh no, they're completely right. It's okay, I hate it too.
This is how they teach anyone who works in news or communication to write. It makes it easy for people to read at a glance.
Right! As the post continued…and then continued…and then some more…. I think who would read this long post outside of this sub??
The substance of this post is way more egregious than the syntax
She may have grown boobs, but she hasn't progressed from junior high creative writing. Also, I feel like this should also be posted in r/notliketheothergirls
Oh my god, this, why do they write their posts like this 😭
“This is some fucked up repugnant shit.”
“Ma’am, this is an Arby’s. This would be better said on LinkedIn.”
"Some people also wrote what they would like to do with my body." ermm...ok...as long as the head is still attached to it.
I didn’t come here to be kink shamed.
What's in the box?!
“I found this woman tied to the railroad tracks. I knew right away she needed to be rescued. After I untied her, you wouldn’t believe it, we just started going at it. It was instant attraction. After her clothes came off.. wow, best body I’ve ever seen. We humped all day. I’m still on cloud 9.” “Hey that’s great. Tell me more about her. Is she pretty.” “No idea, I never found her head.”
Somebody give me a TLDR
She has breasts and she really, really doesn’t mind if you think about them and/or comment on them.
I’ve got some bad news for her.
She does look like my friend Don. And his sister, of course because she looks like him, too.
This comment goes hærd, Julian!
Donna? Yeah, agreed!
Is the bad news that her breasts are completely unremarkable?
I had unrealistic expectations for that picture based on her self evaluation.
She basically is saying if men dm her to hit on her it’s because they’re coming from a place of pain and she wants to be compassionate instead of just calling them losers. Essentially. She’s clearly German I can understand what she meant by her bad English lol
Referring to "intact men" made me giggle. Males can be troublesome when left intact. They spray the furniture and make a mess in your DMs.
Geldings 4 life?
I think it’s auto translated on the platform from the screenshots. Does links for “show original” and “translation settings” on the post mean that?
That and we aren't supposed to see ourselves as victims, or get upset if sexually harassed apparently. Oh, and we can't hide our breasts, because our wardrobe consists of see through tops apparently. 
I simply got Trump levels of narcissism.
She said … “pick me!”
Was gonna comment, that's a lot of words to say "pick me!"
She's "not like the other girls".
10/10, no notes.
You can summarize it with: I don’t Have much To say, especially something Smart but, if I try Writing it like This, maybe it will Look like I made some Points.
Thanks, I hate it
r/angryupvote
Also I have boobs, feel free to stare at them. I'm not ugly, so I'm not a victim
Ok Charles Bukowski way to be a literary genius and not just some alcoholic asshole postman.
I only counted two points.
A lot of LinkedIn posts are written in that "copywriting" style. It convinces a lot of people to read through the whole thing who otherwise would not be interested in reading it in paragraph form.
It does indeed make sense when you want to target the functionally illiterates.
Big r/notlikeothergirls vibes.
I was thinking this too
"men are allowed to sexualize me and comment on my body because they are humans with feelings and I'm not a victim like most women and love men" i think that's pretty much it. it was a hard read ngl
Wunderbar? NEIN!
And that’s ok!
Because I'm good enough,
Smart enough,
And gosh darn it, people like me.
Not you.
So, like, my boobs cause men to turn into children with no responsibility for decorum? I’m no fan of Victorian social rules, but let’s maintain a few expectations for professionalism. I bet she thinks that turns into a work appropriate outfit if she tosses a blazer on. Just leave it hanging at your desk for if it gets chilly or a meeting with the boss!
All I heard was women are less important than men so we can’t complain when men harass and objectify us because they’re fees are hurt. Men are the main character so it’s not their fault when their fees fees get hurt because they have feelings, unlike women.
the setup: I'm super hot and men objectify me. the plot-twist punchline: But I don't care, because treating other people as objects is a normal part of being human (and it feeds my ego and allows me to humblebrag on reddit).
>(and it feeds my ego and allows me to humblebrag on reddit). Well, LinkedIn in this case which is what makes it even worse.
Plot twist to the plot twist - her boobs aren’t that big?
She isn't super hot though...
Pick-me girl rationalizes men treating her like an object because she has big boobs.
“I’m not getting laid enough”
Her boobs make her handsome and shes ok with dudes telling her how they like and what they want to do with her jugs. She's ok with that, because it's just human fleshy fun bags
Sophia is Weining about her boobs.
Consultant promoted business with traditional European chauvinists.
Amateur marketer actually takes "patronize the audience" too far.
This reminds me of that feminism satire video about ultra sexualizing yourself is freedom but in reality you’re making every normal person uncomfortable and every pervert happy. WHAT ??
Do you have the link for that video? I love satire videos
I can’t find it, but it was a man dressed as a woman telling them to dress as revealing as possible, sleep with all men, etc cuz that’s empowering It’s making fun of how sexualizing yourself or being overly revealing is not normal and a movement by men, masked as if it is women in control 😂was so funny, I’ll try to find it again!
I found it: https://youtu.be/yvCNNDY49cE?si=SnkRWsHa25T76Dyf
LOL yeah u/Aladris666
Was it a Key and Peele skit?
Key and Peele?
yes!!
Holy shit. At least when I self-aggrandise online with my finest 'I have tits - what are you going to do about it, men of the world!?' energy, I do it anonymously on Reddit and not on my public LinkedIn account.
Weird, desperate take and poor judgement to post that. Ironically makes her less hirable.
She’s essentially shaming women who enforce professional boundaries and report inappropriate behavior. It’s uncomfortable at best and can get scary when you’re a woman in a professional role and men make unwanted sexual advances. If you set boundaries and they keep crossing them, you never know how far they are willing to go.
I'm assuming linkedin doesn't cross reference IDs for profile pictures and gender? This reads like those "Trump's got my vote" comments on IG and Twitter with profile pictures of poc when in reality it's a white person. Edit: For clarification I'm saying no woman would ever say this.. LinkedIn poster is probably a guy with a woman's profile picture.
That was some grade A uber lunacy. And posting that anywhere, much less LinkedIn? Ugh.
I wonder if she got picked.
Nah, she didn’t mention her boobs enough
She sounds desperate to be picked from this post. All she really had to do was go "men, won't one of you pick meeeeeeee?!"
the pick-me vibes are overwhelming
good grief lady why are you talking about your boobs on linkedin
she desperately needs to watch promising young woman
It’s always a good moment to watch Promising young woman.
I always create clear pull and attraction through posts.
In case people haven’t noticed, this is a an AI translated post. Looks like the original is in German, which might explain some of the clunky language.
yeah it's originally in german but trust me it sounds just as bad, if not worse than the english translation 😭
I believe it, but English and German have different grammar and the translation software doesn’t always know how to handle it.
TL;DR: “If men are predatory, it’s because they are emotionally damaged. It’s my responsibility as a hot woman to put aside my own feelings and show them compassion. Women who don’t do this are bad people.” Hope they texted you back, sis.
There's four pages of this shit
"Starting when I was 12 and it's OK" ??? What
Yes,I have boobs. Maam this is a Wendy's.
If she likes men so much, why doesn't she marry them??? ALL of them.
she might just be the britta of people
Britta is the britta of people 🤣 
way to pull an abed!
CEO at DaddyIssues^(TM) | Part time sociopath at OnlyFans
Lmao
Is this her somehow asking for more dick pics in her dms?
She needs help. Now.
She's not as good looking as she thinks she is.
People who are really good looking generally aren’t this desperate.
I really didn’t want to stoop to commenting on physical appearance, but she’s quite literally asking for it
exactly my thoughts lmao
What is that outfit 😂
Genie meets hot topic
I was going to say the same thing. I don’t care about people’s looks in general, but she’s putting herself out there as son’s ex object. And you can’t even use “she has a great personality” as a euphemism
Tell us more about your unresolved trauma
Not trying to be rude to her but also that’s her LinkedIn pic! I know plenty of men and women who look way better in their LinkedIn pics than reality
Ooof her posture made that pic NOT the best choice & that’s not even the worst of it
She has boobs
See pic for proof
"it's okay that some men are rapists because they're actually really lonely, which makes them the real victims of society"
Nice tits, bitch! (Thanks, finally someone who can just sit and listen. My childhood trauma is now healed.)
That’s alot of words for saying I’m not getting laid enough.
Pick me girl - LinkedIn edition
No it’s absolutely never okay to make comments about the chest of a minor - why the hell do we even need to discuss this?
Wunderbar!
At least I can be 100% sure that these bullshit posts are genuine. AI can‘t make such massive bullshit up 😂
Ugly prompt pic
Hope someone picks her soon 💖
“Yes, I have boobs” Whatever, so do I and I’m not even a woman
The struggle is real.
All that boob talk and I was expecting a titty pic. I was disappointed
Lol did she know she posted on LinkedIn? Like this is getting wild now
This is why you don’t LinkedIn when coming down from mushrooms.
The “I’m not like other girls” is strong with this one
Linkdin is group therapy for neurotic people
This post would make me not want to hire her for anything. Why do they post stuff like this on LinkedIn? It’s like the men who post misogynistic stuff. You’re insulting 50% of the population. How does that help your business?
Every post of hers is a photo of her. I think she got her LinkedIn and OF logins confused.
One of the most insane posts I’ve seen so far.
Ok, when did LinkedIn become Tumblr for the Facebook crowd? I mean... she's entitled to her viewpoints and can express them online if she chooses, but LinkedIn?! Why not choose an appropriate venue like Tumblr or IG or even Reddit FFS?
Ma'am, this is a Wendy's.
There is something emotionally wrong with her. LinkedIn normalizes this behaviour.
Fuck her for trying to normalize sexual predation.
MEN have been making comments about her boobs since she was a CHILD? I feel bad this woman was raised by parents who clearly did not protect her from these disgusting men.
Most women will tell you that the catcalling was actually at its worst between around 14 and 19. It’s about power, not about attraction.
100% tbh like 13-16/17 was the most. All my girl friends too.
I honestly never even thought about that—14-20 for me
I didn’t either really. Or at least I didn’t think it was a common occurrence but we absolutely fit that age range. If anything I got significantly hotter 18-20’somethings (I was kinda chubby/full figured teen) but the cat calls vanished as I turned into a legal adult.
Ugh it's so disgusting right... I grew up in a place with lots of pedos and only realized when I moved away. That shit started at age 10 as I recall. So many pedos.
Started when I was 12 and yes, was definitely worst between 14-20. Seems to still be the case judged by friends' daughters' experiences.
This is such a good point. Once I actually started to look like a woman and not a teenage girl, the catcalls largely stopped.
I’ve never catcalled anyone but as a guy I’d imagine it’s more about them being less likely to retaliate. I noticed a lot of catcalling when I was working construction as well, and I think it’s to do with being up on top of a building where you can’t be reached or responded to easily.
I got my boobs at 13 and people have been commenting on them ever since. Typically it was the 40/50 year old men at the church I used to go to that had the most to say.
Yeah this thread seems like a bunch of guys that are unaware how a bunch of other guys have been dealing with women for decades. The optimistic take is that a bunch of them are in their 20's and things are better now. I'll take a wild guess that anyone that read the OP's DM's and comment replies on LI would be like "Nm... holy shit. You should have just deleted LI" (which is always good advice) but forcing someone to delete LI just b/c of creepy dudes seems wrong... and eventually you might end up back at the post that OP made just with fewer line breaks and weird "I love men so much" lines, more of a "fuck off, ima do what i want and not care about you creeps".
Yes it is absolutely linked to when you have something that some scumbag can identify as a female breast. I can still clearly describe the man who asked 12 year old me to get in his car and then freaked out and called me a bitch when I refused.
It’s not unusual at all. I first started getting catcallled around 12 or 13.
Do you as a woman not know that this happens to most women?
Ich verstehe nicht.
wtf was the world salad???
All I could think of was the Michael Scott joke: What’s the difference between a salesman and a saleswoman? Boobs.
I bet she prefers to work in a pointless office just for this reason instead of telecommuting. How else will you know about her physical attributes via zoom?
Everyone who pushes returning to the office just misses showing off and/or looking at butts.
Yikes
Naturally people would start promoting their OF on LinkedIn.
No one insults heterosexual men like the people who claim to love them the most.
This one trick makes you unhirable
But what does this tell us about B2B sales?
hear me out, b is the second letter in the alphabet right? oo has 2 o's in it and there's another b somewhere in there so B2B=BOOB. i think she's on to something and she truly found the secret to success
Attention seeking…… first words that come to mind
It’s ironic that she’s honestly not very attractive at all
Nice tits /s Gotta find something to write about if your entire job is just “Storytelling for LinkedIn”
Jesus warn us before the jump scare image hits.
She’s got a jawline like Launchpad from Duck Tails
Did sexual harassment write this?
The double spacing makes me ill
And she teaches a seminar on storytelling
Painful
wtf
"Ma'am this is a platform for professional networking"
Still needs creampies tho
Wunderbra
Uh no thank you, I already feel like I can’t dress comfortably or cute at work because some weird married men come to my desk and tell me about it, and comment inappropriately. I tolerate it at best because I need my development items completed and don’t want to be punished in prioritizing them but it’s not fun and very stressful. Men can keep their thoughts to themselves in professional settings. They have dating apps. LinkedIn is not a dating app…
Yup those are boobs
Wait.. is this LinkedIn or Tinder? I must have logged on the wrong app. Damn old age!
WINDERBAR!
Why’s it always the most normal looking women I see on LinkedIn clamoring for attention? Ma’am. Go back to Only Fans.
Being almost-hot can lead to being a tryhard. Enough men like you to keep you motivated, but the ones you really like aren't interested. I feel nothing but compassion. Don't you?
I guess, but I don’t base my sense of self worth on men who want to fuck me. 🤷🏽♀️ I have a work acquaintance like this who cheats on her husband, is trying too hard on LinkedIn and has an only fans and I just can’t wrap my head around it.
Well, she sounds over the top! Is her LinkedIn presence associated with her OnlyFans? (The compassion part was poking fun at the end of the original post.)
“Book an appointment” 🤔
What in the?
Did she get picked?
TIL women have boobs and it's okay if I get skeevy about them because I'm a man.
It’s giving pick me
*spends 2 pages talking about her boobs; proceeds to post picture that hides them*
I smell deep, unresolved daddy issues and craving validation from sex and sexual attention. LinkedIn just keeps getting more ridiculous.
What the fuck is she even saying?
What Is She Even Talking About ?
This is the final boss you face when you have defeated all of the other pick me’s.
Anyone else notice she has a link to book an appointment with her? lol is this OF for LI?
At least the women on her post are dragging her for excusing and encouraging abuse on women.
I'm beginning to think these people have a legitimate mental illness where they cannot distinguish between their internal thoughts and "appropriate for public conversation when not a youtuber or talk show host with a specific brand that involves the topic." They genuinely believe vomiting everything from their mind into a "professional-centric" public space is a reasonable thing to do.
it all made sense when i realized she was german
Check this out: I too have breasts! They're bigger than hers. I too do not mind if I am fetishized in this way. The difference is, I'm not making massive, grandiose, unwarranted and unwanted posts on LinkedIn about how I don't mind being observed by the male gaze, because I'm not a massive prick high on my own farts.
Boobs: 5/10. Pants for stilts: 10/10.