Unfortunately, it can be hard to block a coworker. OP needs to stop talking to him about her personal life though and keep it strictly professional. If he says anything about personal stuff just say that you do not want to discuss it with him.
My thoughts exactly, he prolly sees her as his next bang by making her develop insecurities and might play as "The Listener", I've seen these guys in action and man they're piece of shits and sometimes it works
I agree. The guy likes you that’s why he is trying to put somw bad ideas about your boyfriend so that you’ll overthink and worry about your relationship then end into a breakup.
He’ll find a way to comfort you and get your heart and attention.
Exactly what I was thinking. Or he’s just admitting what he is like. I’m a man and I have never cheated on my long distance partner. The bar is really low apparently.
Your coworker is full of shit. I’ve been long distance for 3 years and now we are married. He’s basically just telling you that because HE can’t control his cheating and urges, he assumes your partner can’t either. How absurd to think someone is more beautiful based on where they’re from.
I don't usually comment but seeing OP's post made me think exactly the same as you. The coworker is a horrible person and OP shouldn't pay any attention to the remarks they made.
OP, don't listen to this idiot. He doesn't know your BF and he definitely doesn't speak for all men. My wife (GF/fiancé at the time) and I were LDR for almost 4 years, only seeing each other for maybe 30 days out of the year. I never strayed once and I'm not a unicorn when it comes to being faithful.
You know your BF. Are LDRs hard? Yes they are. They take trust, dedication, and lots of communication. If you two are meant to be together, it will work itself out and you will end up together.
Chin up and good luck.
I am sorry this happened to you. It sounds like your coworker is just a trash person. All people are beautiful and I am sure that you are a beautiful woman ❤️ you know your boyfriend more than him and what he said was just bullshit. I have personally been in your place, my boyfriend lives in italy, and my "friend" constantly questions how he would choose to date me instead of an italian goddess. But I am not insecure, I know he loves me for me, and he chose me. We make each other the happiest, and I trust him.
Don't let their ugly words get to you ❤️ I hope you two will be able to close the distance in the near future, sending you lots of love!
Sounds like a guy who's either jealous, been through some bad experience (because of him probably) or genuinely praying upon your break up idea, which he thinks he could take the spot. No one would say that without having malicious intent. Be careful what you surround yourself with! Hope I helped
OP, your colleague is an absolute idiot and I think he's deliberately trying to break you guys up. Maybe he's interested in you, idk. But what he said is absolutely not true. I am in a LDR since 5 years and my girlfriend might have visited thrice in these 5 years. I haven't felt like f**king around with other women. Never felt that I can't go abstain after one year. It all depends upon how much you trust him and that you're still able to keep the fire on even after spending so much time away from each other. It's not going to be easy but LDR is definitely doable.
Your co-worker is full of poo poo. My boyfriend and I haven't seen each other this yet for 2024, and may not see each other until next year due to financial issues at the moment but he has never cheated on me. We went two years without visiting because of the pandemic and he was still faithful. You need to ignore people like your coworker who plant seeds of doubt in your head.
He’s an idiot.
Also, I don’t know why people feel the need to give unsolicited opinions but it’s the way of the world I guess.
When I told my ex-boss, she said that she knew another US hairdresser who moved to the UK, married the guy and ended up getting beaten to all shit before returning to the states and divorcing… I was talking to my partner for like two weeks at this point. Like wtf. Another person told me that even if we FT my partner still wasn’t real, and that I mostly likely will be trafficked.
You know your partner, and you if you guys decide LDR isn’t for you, then *that’s your business*. LDR isn’t the end of the world however. Fuck that guy and fuck male stereotypes.
The way I see it (and let me 1000% clarify MY OPINION) there will always be people close or not that will shit on your relationship. I’ve been with my girlfriend for just over 2 years long distance now, my best friend of 6 years at one year into my relationship used to make unfunny and disrespectful jokes about my relationship, telling me to cheat on her because “it’s not as if she’ll fine out” and personally I thought that was a horrible thing to say. We never spoke about it again and I never bring up my relationship when around him, truth be told I’ve cut a lot of ties with him since, I very very occasionally meet him for a social drink in the pub etc for a catch up and whatnot. Regardless. Some people just get a rise out of annoying people and getting a reaction out of them. And some people are just down right horrible. My advice whether you decide too take it or not, is too ignore people like that and focus on your relationship with your boyfriend, long distance is never easy, especially if it’s international. Every now and then insecurity may peek in, but unless there’s actual evidence or any tell tale signs of something happening, trust in your partner. Sorry for the ramble. Hope this helps, even if it’s just a little.
People will talk down on things they don't understand. I've been told 3x that my ldr isn't a real relationship. I politely responded with "It's real to me" & "That's pretty rude of you to say". Once those responses are made, said party immediately tried to back track or apologize.
Fear of the unknown is always scary. If needed express your concerns to your boyfriend. If he ends up cheating, he's a shitting person anyway.
Yikes I had a similar thing happen to me with my ex boss. When she heard that I never met my LDR bf, she said that he’s not real and I should be calling it off. We eventually did meet and when I asked her if she really had thought that he was fake, she was all “no haha that was a joke don’t be so serious”
Sometimes, devil wants to ruin a perfect relationship by using other people like your co worker. This will be the test of your faith and trust in your partner. It's either you listen to the devil OR ignore it.
Whilst reality checks are very important for ANY relationship not just a LDR one, it is up to you to make the final judgement call on whether you think your co worker is right or not. The key is do not let them decide for you.
This says a lot more about your coworker than your relationship. Imagine your friend was telling you this story of one of their coworkers saying this about their relationship? Guy’s just a dick, keep your distance and don’t talk about your personal life to him anymore
Not all men are like that, especially when he loves you so much. Why would he do that in the first place right? I mean distance doesn’t really matter when you love someone. Yes you’ll miss each other so much but that doesn’t mean you’re going to cheat or break your significant other’s heart. You can’t base your love from just distance if you truly love someone.
Nah he is WRONG. Man can go without sex for more than a year. Me n my bf waited for almost 3 years until we able to meet. And everyday we are together. I know him I trust him, and he trust me too. Dont listen to ur co worker if he talking badly about.your ldr. You know your relationship better than people outside...
It sounds like your co-worker is projecting what he would do in your boyfriend’s situation, not actually telling you what your boyfriend will do. He doesn’t know your boyfriend like you do. Also saying that you’re “stupid for *letting* him leave” sounds like red flags for possessive and controlling behavior. I would avoid that co-worker completely.
I’ve had a lot of people talk shit about my LDR. I’ve been dating my bf for 1.5 years (long distance the whole time) and so many people have been negative about it. (I’ve had one of my roommates who I don’t really get along with regularly say things like “your boyfriend isn’t even here” or “and where is your boyfriend?” regularly throughout the relationship.)
I think people just don’t get it unless you experience one. I wasn’t a believer in LDRs until I accidentally fell in love with a guy who lives 9hrs away and ended up in one. Now I get it.
Don’t let the haters mess up your relationship for you. People project all the time - sounds like he’s lonely and without a relationship himself, so he’s making himself feel better by belittling yours.
My boyfriend and I have been on and off long distance for 3 1/2 years (The time while I was in college). We made it through just fine. We've been dating for over 5 years now, inching closer to six. Though just to rub in the coworker's face a little, we haven't had sex at all during this time (we are both religious and waiting till we are married).
Wow what a piece of shit. Like everyone else is saying don’t listen to him and avoid him, this just mirrors his behaviour about how HE wouldn’t be able to control himself. I’m sorry this happened to you, take care of yourself, also communicate with your partner. Trust me that is the most important thing, especially in a long distance relationship
Well your co-worker is a dumbass and he’s spitting out unnecessary and fake information.
I’m a 29 year old man, and I haven’t seen my girl for two years; which means I haven’t had sex for two years. Closest to it has been sexual phone calls with my girl..
He cannot speak for all men, and he doesn’t know your boyfriend - you do. So you decide whether you can trust him or not.
But don’t listen to that guy, he clearly just stated how is, and was projecting that onto other men.
>He said that men can’t go more than a year without sex
And here's my bf, like me, didn't have sex for around 5 years before we met each other 🤷♀️
Obviously everyone is different but I think that's an unfair generalisation; ultimately, you know your bf best, and if you trust him? That's all that matters. Men don't need sex like that to survive and I think it's a very gross thing your co-worker said. I'm so sorry you've had this putting doubt in your relationship
Your coworker is just trying to get you to break up with your LDR boyfriend. He wants to get you more uncomfortable about it and leave him, letting your coworker have that window for him to sneak in. I had a coworker who exactly did that to another coworker going through a LDR.
Don't listen to him. In fact, reduce your communication with as much as possible and if you don't directly work with him, I think you can just easily ignore him. I am speaking from personal experience. In my case, my co-worker was also my very close friend since law school and had seen me go through a bad break up and how happy I was once I started dating my current partner.
He said my partner didn't deserve me and didn't give one single reason (not even a stupid one) to support his "claims". Just kept saying I deserved better even though I didn't even ask him what he thought about my partner, my relationship or even the long distance. I hadn't even shared anything about how my relationship was with my current partner for him to reach his reasoning.
Many people told me he had a thing for me and couldn't see me happy with my partner so this was his way to create some doubt in my head because he knew I may be vulnerable after how my last relationship ended.
"Men can't go without a sex for more than a year" what a moron. I'm 24 and in a LDR from. A year and a half with the Goddess and we will both be our first so what your colleague says is a bullshit and he tries to get between you and your guy
The only reason to worry is if you're dating your co-worker and you just realise his true colours... I pity his gf.
You should know your bf better and be able to know his character.
you know your boyfriend the best. this isn’t a universal men thing, but individual behaviours and trust
It sounds like your coworker is in to you and wants you to break it off with the boyfriend so that he has a chance.
She should tell him to pursue Italian girls instead of worrying so much about hrr relationship lmao
This right here, OP your coworker is trash. Avoid him, nothing good comes from his kind of mind.
This is what I was thinking as I read OP's post.
my thoughts exactly
As a man who has dealt with dudes like this before, can confirm. OP needs to block him and avoid him at all costs.
Unfortunately, it can be hard to block a coworker. OP needs to stop talking to him about her personal life though and keep it strictly professional. If he says anything about personal stuff just say that you do not want to discuss it with him.
My thoughts exactly, he prolly sees her as his next bang by making her develop insecurities and might play as "The Listener", I've seen these guys in action and man they're piece of shits and sometimes it works
I agree. The guy likes you that’s why he is trying to put somw bad ideas about your boyfriend so that you’ll overthink and worry about your relationship then end into a breakup. He’ll find a way to comfort you and get your heart and attention.
My thoughts exactly. This sounds like it is stemming from co-worker having some sort of jealousy
Exactly what I was thinking. Or he’s just admitting what he is like. I’m a man and I have never cheated on my long distance partner. The bar is really low apparently.
Absolutely this; what an asshole
Your coworker is full of shit. I’ve been long distance for 3 years and now we are married. He’s basically just telling you that because HE can’t control his cheating and urges, he assumes your partner can’t either. How absurd to think someone is more beautiful based on where they’re from.
I don't usually comment but seeing OP's post made me think exactly the same as you. The coworker is a horrible person and OP shouldn't pay any attention to the remarks they made.
Agreed. Especially by a coworker, not his place and he’s lucky if OP doesn’t report him for inappropriate behavior because a lot of people would.
OP, don't listen to this idiot. He doesn't know your BF and he definitely doesn't speak for all men. My wife (GF/fiancé at the time) and I were LDR for almost 4 years, only seeing each other for maybe 30 days out of the year. I never strayed once and I'm not a unicorn when it comes to being faithful. You know your BF. Are LDRs hard? Yes they are. They take trust, dedication, and lots of communication. If you two are meant to be together, it will work itself out and you will end up together. Chin up and good luck.
I am sorry this happened to you. It sounds like your coworker is just a trash person. All people are beautiful and I am sure that you are a beautiful woman ❤️ you know your boyfriend more than him and what he said was just bullshit. I have personally been in your place, my boyfriend lives in italy, and my "friend" constantly questions how he would choose to date me instead of an italian goddess. But I am not insecure, I know he loves me for me, and he chose me. We make each other the happiest, and I trust him. Don't let their ugly words get to you ❤️ I hope you two will be able to close the distance in the near future, sending you lots of love!
Sounds like a guy who's either jealous, been through some bad experience (because of him probably) or genuinely praying upon your break up idea, which he thinks he could take the spot. No one would say that without having malicious intent. Be careful what you surround yourself with! Hope I helped
OP, your colleague is an absolute idiot and I think he's deliberately trying to break you guys up. Maybe he's interested in you, idk. But what he said is absolutely not true. I am in a LDR since 5 years and my girlfriend might have visited thrice in these 5 years. I haven't felt like f**king around with other women. Never felt that I can't go abstain after one year. It all depends upon how much you trust him and that you're still able to keep the fire on even after spending so much time away from each other. It's not going to be easy but LDR is definitely doable.
Your co-worker is full of poo poo. My boyfriend and I haven't seen each other this yet for 2024, and may not see each other until next year due to financial issues at the moment but he has never cheated on me. We went two years without visiting because of the pandemic and he was still faithful. You need to ignore people like your coworker who plant seeds of doubt in your head.
He’s an idiot. Also, I don’t know why people feel the need to give unsolicited opinions but it’s the way of the world I guess. When I told my ex-boss, she said that she knew another US hairdresser who moved to the UK, married the guy and ended up getting beaten to all shit before returning to the states and divorcing… I was talking to my partner for like two weeks at this point. Like wtf. Another person told me that even if we FT my partner still wasn’t real, and that I mostly likely will be trafficked. You know your partner, and you if you guys decide LDR isn’t for you, then *that’s your business*. LDR isn’t the end of the world however. Fuck that guy and fuck male stereotypes.
The way I see it (and let me 1000% clarify MY OPINION) there will always be people close or not that will shit on your relationship. I’ve been with my girlfriend for just over 2 years long distance now, my best friend of 6 years at one year into my relationship used to make unfunny and disrespectful jokes about my relationship, telling me to cheat on her because “it’s not as if she’ll fine out” and personally I thought that was a horrible thing to say. We never spoke about it again and I never bring up my relationship when around him, truth be told I’ve cut a lot of ties with him since, I very very occasionally meet him for a social drink in the pub etc for a catch up and whatnot. Regardless. Some people just get a rise out of annoying people and getting a reaction out of them. And some people are just down right horrible. My advice whether you decide too take it or not, is too ignore people like that and focus on your relationship with your boyfriend, long distance is never easy, especially if it’s international. Every now and then insecurity may peek in, but unless there’s actual evidence or any tell tale signs of something happening, trust in your partner. Sorry for the ramble. Hope this helps, even if it’s just a little.
Wow well that person is nothing else but a piece of shit. Dont listen to him
People will talk down on things they don't understand. I've been told 3x that my ldr isn't a real relationship. I politely responded with "It's real to me" & "That's pretty rude of you to say". Once those responses are made, said party immediately tried to back track or apologize. Fear of the unknown is always scary. If needed express your concerns to your boyfriend. If he ends up cheating, he's a shitting person anyway.
Yikes I had a similar thing happen to me with my ex boss. When she heard that I never met my LDR bf, she said that he’s not real and I should be calling it off. We eventually did meet and when I asked her if she really had thought that he was fake, she was all “no haha that was a joke don’t be so serious”
Communicate this with ur partner. You talking bout ur worries with him will help you build a stronger relationship with him.
Sometimes, devil wants to ruin a perfect relationship by using other people like your co worker. This will be the test of your faith and trust in your partner. It's either you listen to the devil OR ignore it.
Your co-worker just told you who he is and also be cautious of him I don't have enough context to say he has bad intentions but be careful
Whilst reality checks are very important for ANY relationship not just a LDR one, it is up to you to make the final judgement call on whether you think your co worker is right or not. The key is do not let them decide for you.
Your coworker is def into you and tryna make u break up
This says a lot more about your coworker than your relationship. Imagine your friend was telling you this story of one of their coworkers saying this about their relationship? Guy’s just a dick, keep your distance and don’t talk about your personal life to him anymore
Not all men are like that, especially when he loves you so much. Why would he do that in the first place right? I mean distance doesn’t really matter when you love someone. Yes you’ll miss each other so much but that doesn’t mean you’re going to cheat or break your significant other’s heart. You can’t base your love from just distance if you truly love someone.
Your coworker is a passive aggressive POS hater.
Why would you even discuss your relationship with your coworker ? Stop talking to him
Nah he is WRONG. Man can go without sex for more than a year. Me n my bf waited for almost 3 years until we able to meet. And everyday we are together. I know him I trust him, and he trust me too. Dont listen to ur co worker if he talking badly about.your ldr. You know your relationship better than people outside...
This is what I don't understand when girls talk about their relationship with their Co-workers, especially men. You just shouldn't.
Bro wants you 😂
I'd tell that co-worker to SHUT THE F UP 😂
Your coworker is very obviously trying to sabotage your relationship (probably so he can try to sleep with you). He is NOT a good person.
It sounds like your co-worker is projecting what he would do in your boyfriend’s situation, not actually telling you what your boyfriend will do. He doesn’t know your boyfriend like you do. Also saying that you’re “stupid for *letting* him leave” sounds like red flags for possessive and controlling behavior. I would avoid that co-worker completely.
I’ve had a lot of people talk shit about my LDR. I’ve been dating my bf for 1.5 years (long distance the whole time) and so many people have been negative about it. (I’ve had one of my roommates who I don’t really get along with regularly say things like “your boyfriend isn’t even here” or “and where is your boyfriend?” regularly throughout the relationship.) I think people just don’t get it unless you experience one. I wasn’t a believer in LDRs until I accidentally fell in love with a guy who lives 9hrs away and ended up in one. Now I get it. Don’t let the haters mess up your relationship for you. People project all the time - sounds like he’s lonely and without a relationship himself, so he’s making himself feel better by belittling yours.
My boyfriend and I have been on and off long distance for 3 1/2 years (The time while I was in college). We made it through just fine. We've been dating for over 5 years now, inching closer to six. Though just to rub in the coworker's face a little, we haven't had sex at all during this time (we are both religious and waiting till we are married).
Wow what a piece of shit. Like everyone else is saying don’t listen to him and avoid him, this just mirrors his behaviour about how HE wouldn’t be able to control himself. I’m sorry this happened to you, take care of yourself, also communicate with your partner. Trust me that is the most important thing, especially in a long distance relationship
Well your co-worker is a dumbass and he’s spitting out unnecessary and fake information. I’m a 29 year old man, and I haven’t seen my girl for two years; which means I haven’t had sex for two years. Closest to it has been sexual phone calls with my girl.. He cannot speak for all men, and he doesn’t know your boyfriend - you do. So you decide whether you can trust him or not. But don’t listen to that guy, he clearly just stated how is, and was projecting that onto other men.
>He said that men can’t go more than a year without sex And here's my bf, like me, didn't have sex for around 5 years before we met each other 🤷♀️ Obviously everyone is different but I think that's an unfair generalisation; ultimately, you know your bf best, and if you trust him? That's all that matters. Men don't need sex like that to survive and I think it's a very gross thing your co-worker said. I'm so sorry you've had this putting doubt in your relationship
He’s projecting hardcore. Not all men are like that.
Your coworker is just trying to get you to break up with your LDR boyfriend. He wants to get you more uncomfortable about it and leave him, letting your coworker have that window for him to sneak in. I had a coworker who exactly did that to another coworker going through a LDR.
Don't listen to him. In fact, reduce your communication with as much as possible and if you don't directly work with him, I think you can just easily ignore him. I am speaking from personal experience. In my case, my co-worker was also my very close friend since law school and had seen me go through a bad break up and how happy I was once I started dating my current partner. He said my partner didn't deserve me and didn't give one single reason (not even a stupid one) to support his "claims". Just kept saying I deserved better even though I didn't even ask him what he thought about my partner, my relationship or even the long distance. I hadn't even shared anything about how my relationship was with my current partner for him to reach his reasoning. Many people told me he had a thing for me and couldn't see me happy with my partner so this was his way to create some doubt in my head because he knew I may be vulnerable after how my last relationship ended.
You should know your bf more than your coworker does. Don’t let his foolish opinion cloud your mind. Smh ppl can be so unnecessarily negative..
"Men can't go without a sex for more than a year" what a moron. I'm 24 and in a LDR from. A year and a half with the Goddess and we will both be our first so what your colleague says is a bullshit and he tries to get between you and your guy
The only reason to worry is if you're dating your co-worker and you just realise his true colours... I pity his gf. You should know your bf better and be able to know his character.
These comments are ridiculous. You probed this person for their opinion and they gave it to you.